Here Lately I have been Thinking About Women Of Color.

I have a Fetlife  Account, Vile1962 . Last week I joined a couple of groups, that had to do with Black Female Submissive’s . I joined the groups because a friend of mine told me I would be a good fit in the group. Being how soft spoken I am.

I have had a couple of females request to be friends.Now we are shooting emails back and forth. Although nothing will come of if, it is nice to have someone asking questions. One thing I make clear, what I say is just my own opinion, and thoughts.

I do come off kinda strong at times, egotistical, stuck up, self centered, I could go on and on.  I can tell you this if you take the time out to get to know me, you would not have a better friend, Or Dominant.

I have never been prejudice I grew up in a small country town, brought up with good Southern values. I will bend over backwards to help someone if I see they are trying to help themselves. If you are not, well you can guess.

About 1.5 years ago when I was going through my mini sabbatical, re-finding myself, getting my shit together, and making sure of what I wanted out of life and.

I wanted to have my life straight, no problems, no drama, and no Ex issues, before entering another relationship. Just prior I made a couple of bad choices speaking of relationships. We do this when we feel something missing and we want to fill that void. We tend to settle for less. The bad thing is it never works out.

So what do we do? We wait, we seek, until we find the perfect fit. The One. I can tell you it is not an easy task. As a matter of fact It would probably be an easier task if I would bend, or change the way I am, but I refuse.

So I met this black female who lives in Texas a school teacher, very smart, awesome personality, and we talked for hours and hours for a couple of months. The problem we had in the end is her children. Which is really not a problem because a mother is always going to be there for her kids. I respect a single mother who has children, and works to keep a home. My hat goes off to all of you.

The second thing, her kids who were both in college, found out I was white. Yea they had a fit, but I was okay with that, and in a way I understand, then again I do not after all it is the year 2012.

Then came my parents, both Pentecostal, my stepmother is a bishop, and teaches part time at UT, as a substitute. They both being Christians, very loving people, God fearing. Well they came unglued at the seams. Wow really are you serious. The Pentecostal’s who are now letting Gay and Lesbians become bishops. I commend the church for allowing this as well. I may not agree, but it is only fair, I suppose. Who am I to say what is right and what is wrong. I know if your someone who follows the bible then it is not right. I believe that we as adults should be able to choose out own partners, with out backlash from our Government

The point I am making is they were judging me. Telling me it was not right in gods eyes, I was wrong. This is why I am Buddhists and I would like to blog about that sometime, how it has change me and helped me in the lifestyle.

Now my parents know of my lifestyle, I hide nothing from anyone. It is not something I boast about, but if I happen to get close enough to someone I tend to open up a little bit. They do not agree with me, and my stepmother will tell you I need help.

So I have to sit down and do what is adventitious to me , not anyone else. Just as I told my stepmother, you are not paying my bills, you are not doing my laundry, I am not banging you, nor would I . Yes I said those things. I am not on her favorite list of people she prays for every night, well maybe she does, and finds out the next day when I call her prayers were not answered.

This is really a touchy subject and I had to think hard before sitting down, and just let my thoughts flow. We are not in control, who or when we find the right partner. Sometimes we are just narrow minded, and we have a mindset of what we need, not want, wants are to vague. What we need. Our needs must be met way before our wants.

So would I date a black female, sure I would, if I found or could see the qualities, in a slave that fits my needs. I think most would find a relationship in the D;s lifestyle a little taboo. Then again we are not her to make others happy, it does not matter what others think. The bottom line it is what makes you happy. Am I seeking a black female? I am looking for a slave. A life long partner. Maybe that answers the question, maybe not.

The key is waiting, being patient, not getting stressed out. Spending to much time worrying if there is someone out there for us. Sure there is. Being in the lifestyle it may not be as easy, but yes there is someone.

Take note about what I said about getting my shit together. If you enter a relationship, and you have mounds of problems, you are causing great harm to your partner..

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16 Responses to “Here Lately I have been Thinking About Women Of Color.”

  1. Mr. Vile,
    If you think Texas Pentecostals are rough you have not met an Old southern Texas Episcopalian. I enjoy your writings & my Sir is correct I am learning a great deal…thank you for your insight. I hope I can become a better submissive for him, he deserves the world.
    Amanda

    • Thank you for following, I will hit you up later.
      I am against organized religion, it lost its meaning in the 50’s
      It is now about money. Now I do not judge anyone for what they believe,
      if one is happy that is all that counts.
      The thing about the lifestyle is, you never stop learning, everyday is a
      bright and new experience. Every day you grow, more so, you know you have
      someone who truly care for you…
      Vile

      • Mr. Vile,
        You are wise beyond your years. Above and beyond anything else I want to excel at being my Sir’s submissive, his alone. Thank you.
        A

  2. You’re a cool dude, Vile…very cool…

  3. I have a great deal of respect for him as well. He did the right thing. Unlike most so called Dominants, who have to crawl like a piece of low life hiding and living a second life.
    You have a good Master,.

  4. Butterfly Joy Says:

    “The key is waiting, being patient, not getting stressed out. Spending to much time worrying if there is someone out there for us. Sure there is. Being in the lifestyle it may not be as easy, but yes there is someone.”
    Very well said Vile!!!
    And I totally agree with you, Buddhism is the one that makes most sense with the lifestyle!

  5. Did I understand this correctly: that your religious family is okay with the BSDM lifestyle and a blog devoted to it, but date a black woman and that’s IT, now you’re going over the top?

    • thekinkyworldofvile Says:

      No my family is not okay with my lifestyle, I have not dated a black female yet, I said I had been thinking about it as of late.
      Although I have had the chance to date a black submissive, I have never crossed that line, for what ever reason.

    • What ever the reason Carolina, many people in the BDSM lifestyle live double lives. The BDSM is a big secret. Although I do not just run up to total strangers and blab about my kinks I do not hide.
      All my friends know who and what I am about. Most of my vanilla friends are females, go to the movies, out to eat, fishing, car shows you get the picture. No sex at all. They know about my lifestyle, but they fell safe, because they know I am not about sex with them

  6. Written well. My favorite subject of yours, of getting your act together before starting a relationship was tacked on the end, so you know I liked that bit best.

    Please do write about Buddhism. Everything and anything you wish to say. Yes, it will be interesting on it’s own, but your thoughts of Buddhism in practice by you, will be quite valuable to many I think.

  7. I was worried when I first started exploring with BDSM, being a young black female sub. I’m actually happy at the openness others have with me in the community. I’ve come across a few jerks who said that I was only doing what I had been born to do in the first place, though my Dom quickly checked them. I appreciate any doms or subs who give a black male/female a chance because speaking from experience it took a while for me to actually build up my confidence to take that first step.

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