Our Collaring Ceremony

Well there comes a time when something just feels right. In the world of BDSM a Collar is earned it is not giving. A submissive or slave must prove they are worthy of wearing their masters collar.

How is one worthy? The truth is there are not many who are truly submissive or a slave, far and few between. Then there are those who are only submissive in the bedroom. That is fine and good for those such a lifestyle fits.

Being compliant is first on my list, adjusting to my surroundings is second. Adjusting to my way is third, following my rules , my protocol. You never question my actions, unless I am about to make a mistake, which is very seldom. I think things out clearly before acting. The way one acts in public, as well as private. The willingness to please and serve, but the main thing of course is communication, an open line of communication at all times. If I ask a direct question, I want a direct answer, not an explanation. If it is a yes or no question that is what I want, not an explanation.

To a submissive or slave adaptability is most important, most can and have no problem, but there are those who are somewhat high strung. In time that can be fixed.

The Dominant must stay on a consistent role. The Dominant cannot give rules that are out of touch, or reality. The Dominant cannot change rules midway to fit his needs. The Dominant cannot just sit around and wait on one to make a mistake. Beating is not always the answer. In five months I have punished Arianna one time. I had to think about it before hand, because it was something I truly did not want to do. On the other hand if I had not followed through with the punishment I would not of been the Dominant Arianna thought I was or what I had told her. Punishing her made her respect me that much more.

Arianna is the most compliant slave I have ever met, she craves to please and serve, she does not want to, it is a deep need. Arianna also knows I look out for her best interest. Arianna knows she can come to me about anything and speak freely and openly. Arianna knows at times I let her stumble, but I pick her back up. If you the Dominant only knows the word no, how fair is that to the submissive or slave. You have to say yes sometimes , and if it turns out to be a mistake we fix it, then we explain.

The truth be known last month I asked Arianna if I could collar her. Her answer was she was not ready, I understood, and I agreed after we talked about it. Well something changed this month and she explained she was ready to take the next step. She would gladly except my collar. She went one step further and she proposed. I declined for now on the proposal, only because I have to really think about that.  I do see us as long term, I see neither of us going anyplace anytime soon. We fit like peanut butter and jelly. I just may take her up on that.

So I began looking for a collar. It had to be special, and unique. I really love the Eternity Collars, but they are made in mass production. So I contacted houseofcollars. The man was awesome. I measured Arianna’s neck, and he made it to fit. There are some imperfections in the collar but that is what makes it special. I ordered it last Tuesday and it arrived Saturday. It has a removable O ring which is much better. Stainless steel in a Matt finish. It locks and only I can remove it.


We are having the ceremony in Orlando. I have a very good friend, I want to perform the ceremony. We are expecting 25 to 30 people, a small ceremony.

I bought Arianna a long Back Dress, to wear, nice but simple, it almost touches the ground. She will wear simple flats. She wants to order a cake, a red velvet with the BDSM symbol in the middle with our names on it.

The ceremony is very special. It is called The Ceremony of the Roses.

The formal lifestyle is filled with traditions and ceremonies that are seldom witnessed by the outside world and perhaps one of the most moving and meaningful is the “bonding ritual” or Ceremony of the Roses. This ceremony is steeped in symbolism and mystique that dates back for centuries. Here is a brief description of what it involves and means

An Eternal Bond A couple who has decided to remain together for the duration of their lives and beyond will often opt for this ritual as a symbolic statement of their eternal commitment. It is sometimes used to renew a relationship that has gone through a difficult time and survived the test. There are many variations and couples often choose to add special touches to make it uniquely theirs.

The ceremony is never public. Most often only the couple and one or two of their closest associates attend. The submissive carries a single white rose, not quite in full bloom. The Dominant holds a single red rose that is opened almost fully. Both roses must have thorns on their stems and be freshly cut. To perform two other parts of this ritual, a 6-8 foot length of light chain is also required along with several candles or an alcohol burner (or other liquid fuel , such as a good serving dish might use).

The couple, along with one or two of their closest friends, stand facing each other. The submissive, wearing a simple dress, holds her single white rose. Her Dominant, holding his red rose, removes her collar. He passes it quickly through the flames of a small burner and returns it to her neck. As he fastens it securely, he makes a declaration to her that he will protect and guide her for all of eternity.

With a thorn on the stem of his red rose, he pricks her middle finger and lets two drops of blood fall on the white petals of her rose. She then offers the thorns of her rose to him and he pricks his own finger. He lets two drops fall to her rose, one alone and one on top of a drop of hers.

Their witnesses or friends take a length of light-weight chain and pass it quickly though the flame and wrap it around the couple. They again make their vows to be bound by their souls for eternity. The roses are touched together, letting the blood from hers kiss his, and are then exchanged. The chain is removed and wrapped carefully in a cloth to be given to the couple when the ceremony has ended. The roses are put into a single vase and will later be taken to their private chamber to remain as a reminder to them as they contemplate their new bond that night while joining their bodies.

In the morning, they share their hopes and dreams of being together for eternity and pluck the petals from the roses to place them in a container together. These petals are kept for the lifetime of the couple and a portion of them are buried with each in death. The chain is passed down in the family or given to an honored friend who will use it in their own bonding ceremony.

The Symbolism Revealed

The significance of the roses.

The ceremony will take place on the 26th or April possibly the 27th. I will know the exact date here in a couple of days.

The collaring of a submissive or slave should be very special, not in some Hotel room or over at your house and the Dominant says here put this on. The Collaring should be very special, something to remember..



22 Responses to “Our Collaring Ceremony”

  1. Congrats to you both! I love the symbolism of the ceremony.

  2. Congratulations to you Vile! 🙂

  3. Best wishes and congratulations

  4. Congrates to you both, I wish you both all the best. I am so pleased that you both are getting on so well. Hugs & kisses XOXOX

  5. Congratulations to you both!

  6. That’s just so beautiful! Congratulations to the both of you!

  7. Thank You all for the best wishes and warmest thoughts. I feel honored to serve such a respected Master. Thank you also for sharing this journey with us as we delve deeper and deeper Into the dynamics of a tue 24/7 Master and slave relationship.

  8. Congratulations!!!!
    I am so happy, even if I don’t know you both in person, for the both of you. To meet your one is so rare and I am happy you and Arianna have each other.
    Have a blessed ceremony.

    I do have a small question and I hope I don’t offend but why are you so opposed to having the ceremony at a hotel, or someone’s house?
    What if to them their home is truly special to them or what if they have a special city or a country and that is where they want to have their collaring ceremony?
    Why couldn’t it be performed there?

    I agree that it should be special and be done at a special place and most of all the Dom/Domme should be the one placing his collar on their submissive. I shudder to think that some can be so callus and say “put this on” 😦

    Thank you in advance.

    • Hmmm , thank you for stopping by. I am going to re-read the post we are having the ceremony at a Dom and slaves house. We have been friends for about ten years.
      I had contacted another friend but he had never taking part in a ceremony.
      I picked the place, I bought the dress, and collar, Arianna is putting everything else together. I will post our vows soon, it is almost the same as getting married, which I might add she did propose to me, but I declined for now. It is not to say that down the road, things may change..
      Much Love

      • MaríMar Says:

        You are welcome I love reading your blog and as time permits I try to catch up and comment.
        I can’t wait to read your vows and thank you in advance for sharing them with us.

  9. It is a very intense ceremony. We were invited to one yesterday and it was awesome and moving and unforgettable.

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