Master And Slave Are One

Okay some may say 7 months is way to soon to even consider thinking about getting married. In the past I would not of even considered putting a collar on a slaves neck in less than a year.

The truth be known I never thought I would marry again, nor did I think I would be living 24/7 with a slave. I was looking but not looking. I guess I was in a chill mode. I had dated so much I was just tired.

Although it is hard to find a real Dominant the same goes when looking for a real slave, far and few between. The same could of been said about me I suppose after a date.

I was just chilling, I had cut off all my friends in the lifestyle. I had stopped attending events. I stopped heading up a local munch. I truly just wanted to be left alone while I was gathering my thoughts, needs and wants. In the past I had settled for less, knowing it was not going to work. I suppose at times we just need the closeness, the companionship, conversation.

Then I met Arianna, in the beginning I was very cautious , I truly did not think anything would come of us meeting. Then you just get a good feeling, you can feel something is right. You take a deep breath and you feel refreshed. Still being cautious I decided to see where it would lead.

So I explained who I was, what I expected out of a relationship, my wants, and needs. I put all the cards on the table.

I control everything, the word no is not in your vocabulary. You follow my rules, my protocols. You must give up 100% control without question. You sit, dress, walk, eat, shower, speak, sleep and wake when I say.

Many of you are going WOW REALLY? My need to be a Dominant is just that a need not a want. Over the years I have grown, and my expectations of what or how I saw a relationship grew. My needs changed. I wanted a true slave.

Now this does not mean I do not value Arianna’s opinion, this does not mean I do not care what she has to say. Arianna knows she can come to me and talk about anything, she also knows I listen.

The key to being a good Dominant is to not only care for yours, but to value what you have. Value what you have. That is something many look over today. Respect what is giving to you as the Dominant or the Domme. Do not take advantage of what is giving. Their submission is a gift of trust. Their submission is needed it is not a want.

Master and Slave meet everything goes well, both have their guard up, both are looking for the same thing, a life long partner, who fits their needs.  I mention needs of people and not so much wants. If you have everything you need, your wants become almost nonexistent.

Meeting your needs is the most important things you can look for in a relationship. Communication being the first. Being able to sit down and hold a real conversation that is not just based on sex. Being able to laugh and joke, going out with each other. Although your master and slave, you still need the little get a ways. You need to become best friends.

Then of course the kinks, the sex, bondage, sessions. All of this must be talked about prior to entering a relationship that is M’s based Master and Slave. This is not a fifteen minute conversation. This is a conversation that should be in the privacy of your home, TV’s off.

When I tried to leave the lifestyle, even when I married a vanilla , I still had to add dome kink. Sucking cock was first on the list, then anal was on the list. To me both were a must. Well she sucked at both, once married all my needs came to an end. The sex was a total disaster.

I am thinking what the fuck have I done. Now I have the house on the beach, the convertible, the dog, and grilling out with the two fat people next door. He carried a cooler full of beer everywhere he went. Always inviting me to a bar, the elks club.

Okay so I got myself in this mess so now I need to fix it. Eight years into the marriage I came clean. I was suffering I needed out.

I told her who I really was, every thing I was into, all the kink, the control, and I just got a blank stare. Then the next day I was told to move out.

Then Nine years I spent in total hell, I still remained Loyal, no matter how much or bad I felt I never stepped out. Yes I do have morals and some values.

You find the one, you know when you do. You have this warm feeling run through your body. We you both leave to go home, you have this overwhelming rush, like a high, your on the moon. The more you get to know each other the better you feel.

If you start your D’s or M’s out with fucking and sucking that is what the relationship is going to be nothing more, 6 to 12 months it comes to an end sometimes sooner. You have to start out as friends , friends only…  Sex or the lifestyle should not come up, you both already have that in common. Once you get to know each other, then step into the more personal aspect of the relationship.

The biggest road block is forcing yourself not to move to fast even though you know it is right. Trying not to rush, but your on such a high, at times everything seems like a dream.

When in a M’s relationship and your in love at times it is hard to stay consistent when it comes to being in the Master’s role. Many think being a Dominant is just barking out orders but that is far from the truth. You have to be able to set love aside when it comes to , lets say punishing, or correcting. Staying on task is very important.

Once you let your feelings get in the way, and the Dominant becomes to comfortable he becomes to relaxed, the slaves starts to get away with little things, without consequences, thus the Dominant is no longer in control, then we are not what the submissive or slave needed. I am speaking from experience.

It takes time to learn to separate both , it is not an easy task. On the other hand neither is the first 30 to 45 days of living with your slave. When the Dominant is setting the pace , he is setting the expectations. The rules, being consistent is the most important part of the relationship. The first 30 to 45 days is the deal breaker, this tells if the two are going to become one.

Truth be known if the two are compatible everything falls into place like domino’s. Keeping a routine is good, but the Dominant has to change things up at times. The Slave will try desperately to figure out her owner, so making small unexpected changes in the daily activity is also needed.

Never be afraid to punish, never let your emotions or feelings get in the way. If you as the Dominant allow such the relationship will fail.

Master and Slave do become one.



2 Responses to “Master And Slave Are One”

  1. Very well said and valuable advice.

  2. ‘smiles’ I am happy for you ..

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