How Far Is To Extreme

Every submissive or slave is different, just as every Dominant is different. The world of BDSM has grown 110% over the last ten years, some for the good but for the most many have strayed away from the traditional D’s and M’s. Today it is mostly about kink. Unlike ten years ago it was not uncommon to see a couple who had been together , 5 10, 15 years or longer.

Today we have moved more into a kink world, nothing is considered long term, just like a vanilla relationship it is easier to pack up and move on to the next in hopes the grass is greener on the other side. When in fact most of the time it is not.

BDSM Bondage, Discipline , Sadomasochism , sadist , and masochist if you will. You can be a sadist and not be a dominant, I have met masochist who were not a slave nor were they submissive, and a D’s relationship would not be adventitious for them, because they are just looking for the pain aspect, could be a alpha outside the bedroom.

When someone is new to the lifestyle if they do not have the right guidance, one can stray off of their path without knowing. Meeting your first Dominant or sadist, because a sadist at times will tell you he is a dominant, as far as he knows he may think he is until it comes to the responsibility part of the relationship. After 3 months 6, or maybe a year you come to realize this is not for you, there is a bad taste in your mouth.

A sadist is just that, very few have the dominant side, the need to inflict pain, more so the need to see your pain through your eyes, that is the rush.

A new submissive or slave to the lifestyle will take most anything that is dished out and then some, be it verbal, mental and yes physical. They will take what ever just to please, hoping to find the one, but most of all acceptance.

Most have been a Slave or submissive all their life, but did not have a clue about the lifestyle or what they are. The sub, or slave just knows they are different, and most do not fit in the average circle of friends, and no one to talk to about their feelings. I have talked to slaves who had feelings at a very young age, early teens. Some find out at a young age then there are late bloomers in their 30’s 40’s and even 50’s.

Most men not just Dominants think with their cock, every 40 or 50 year old dominant wants a 18 year old slave. It can be fun for short term but I have seen very few last. I was the same way so I am speaking from experience. I found I was babysitting much of the time. I am not saying there are not those who are mature at that age, because there are.

I prefer an older slave, someone who has experienced life, someone who is mature. Now it is not to say that if I had not met Arianna it is possible I would of met someone much younger, although that is not what I was looking for in a relationship, we cannot help who we like of fall in love with.

A lot of younger subs or slave prefer older dominants those who have been in the lifestyle for sometime, those with experience. Would a 20 yr old submissive really consider a 20 year old dominant? maybe just maybe but at such a young age what does the dominant really know about the lifestyle, or how to implement structure in someones life, enforce rules, but most of all stay in control, and not be controlling. Just my thoughts you do not have to agree with me.

So you meet a New dominant for the first time. Dinner someplace public. Then you jump in the car and head for the nearest Motel. He ties you up, blindfolds you and the HELL starts, you have never been beating so bad in your life, fucked in every hole even if you had limits in place. The next day you can hardly walk, your black and blue, or worse something is broking. Okay lets say you suck it up, take about a week to heal, your going to either stay away or your going to try it one more time.

To most sadist if he is not looking for a relationship, he is just looking to put another notch in his belt, you were a piece of meat for the night, he busted a nut you went home crying. I am speaking from experience here I am not just running off at the mouth. To many are to eager to please, they could care less if they are pleased. To many are eager to meet someone and allow someone to use them. It many cases the after the fact is to late.

So just how far is to extreme? how far do you really need to go to find the one? better yet how much are you going to take?

I have said before have a list ready, your needs, your do nots, and your limits, and what you expect out of a relationship. Stick to the list do not bend from it. Once you give in your just another notch in someones belt. I know I had one belt I had to replace because there was no room for anymore notches.

Believe me when I say this you can get hurt, you can get hurt bad, and chances are you will not go to the police and explain why you let a stranger tie you up and beat you.

Just think, as your pulling into a denny’s how far is to extreme.

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Vile

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