Are You Looking For Submission Or Just The Kink ?

Submission comes on many different levels , many married couples only take part in any D’s while in the Bedroom, once the door opens it is back to ward and june clever, your normal everyday vanilla couple. There is nothing wrong with that we all need our own outlet.

Many read books and something just triggers, something deep inside may have been hidden for many years, or something happened as a child and something twenty years later sent triggers to your brain, and you have no idea where your thoughts are coming from. What you once thought as Taboo and nasty now kinda rings some type of bell in your head.

The down side to this is if your married, and you wake up one morning at you feel like your a different woman inside out. You have this need to be controlled, the need to be used, and it does not matter how your used.Ā  Sometimes if you have the right communication things can be worked out, or you can manipulate your husband. into getting what you need.Ā  The correct way would be talking to him about your needs, and why you think you have changed, what caused these series of hmmm events to take place.

Some husbands will do what ever is needed to keep his family together , then again some view D’s or BDSM as abuse, and if you really do not know anything about the lifestyle the first thing that comes to mind is abuse…

While I do believe a woman can wake up and the submissive slaps her in the face, it is much different when it comes to a Dominant. Being Dominant in a relationship is not something that is learned over night.

I have said this before the best way for someone who wants to live this type of lifestyle is to find a mentor. Someone who has the time to talk to, to teach and share life experiences. Being a Dominant is much deeper than just Barking orders or passing out senseless rules, or punishing.

Maybe your just kinky, maybe you just like rough sex, maybe you just enjoy bondage, maybe you enjoy being gang banged. There are people out there who can meet your needs.

There is a difference between a kinkster and a Dominant a huge difference,Ā  and your search should be different. It is really easy to mislead someone and you really not meaning to, by then you already have feelings involved and it is not fair to the other. So if your just into the kink then look for kink, if your into submission then search out a good Dom.

One thing I like to bring up is, keep your drama at home. You cannot enter a relationship with a dark cloud hanging over your head and every time you speak it pours rain. It is not fair to the other. You would not want someone spilling their guts all over your floor would you, I would think not.

I have also said Arianna and I have zero drama , and I will keep it that way. That is why I limit Arianna’s communication with people, and you can take this to the bank if I tell Arianna NO, there are no questions. I protect what is mine.

Drama is a cancer, and with some people there is no known cure, and it spread and it infects the whole family, and it will drag you down, and it will eat and eat, until you have no friends left.

The D’s world, the M’s world can be very rewarding. I myself look forward to coming home, I want to be home, I have a need to be home.

Everyone is going to have problems come up, but you handle them head on , before they get out of hand. It is easy to put a smoldering fire out than it is a full blaze.

I know everyone does not want the kind of life I have, not everyone is into the M’s lifestyle, but I can show you how to have an awesome relationship, but and there is always a but, nothing is giving to you. If your not willing to put a little bit of effort or work into your relationship, you will walk around with that huge dark cloud, and you will become a cancer.

It is not hard, for myself it was learning to communicate, but the hardest part was learning to listen. If you can do both and you really care, there is no limit.

I cannot even begin to explain how rewarding the D’s lifestyle can be. You can have perfection, your world as you know it can be perfect.

I want everyone to be able to say you know what Vile was right.

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Vile

 

19 Responses to “Are You Looking For Submission Or Just The Kink ?”

  1. Listening is talking. Communication is extremely important.
    I was 17 when I saw the French movie “Histoire d’O” and when O sat down in the car to be brought to Roissy, her boyfriend asked her to lift her skirt so her pussy came in direct contact with the cold leather of the seat. Wow. It was memorable moment in my life.
    Yes a D/s lifestyle can be very rewarding, as much as a M/s one.
    So Vile, I agree with you šŸ™‚

  2. My D just closed the door on some of my relatives this week. His explanation? We don’t need this drama and you need to be protected. Over. That was a RELIEF!! Decades of emotional abuse ended. I am one of those wives you speak of and he gladly stepped up when I shared my desire to submit to his leadership 24/7. As Mr. TW pointed out to me early on, we were already closely following the model. It has been a good transition because we communicate well and are devoted to each other. I just needed to get out of his way.

  3. Thanks Vile, yes, so true!, we make the rules to peace n nirvana. m

  4. Listening, and thoughtfully considering the needs of your partner, then deciding to take action or not to take action. Communication that decision. Not terribly kinky just good relationship dynamic. Well put Vile.

  5. Early in our marriage, and next week marks 21 years, it was all about the kink for us. We toyed with bondage, and used many toys, and Sir has always been a Dominate lover, we just never made the connection to the lifestyle till about 2 1/2 years ago. Now we live as close to a 24/7 D/s life as possible. And in a vanilla setting, or around our children we act just like a regular happily married couple. But I always still show Sir respect, defer to him for decisions, and he is always a gentleman. It all comes down to the rules and protocols, which so many can still be honored in front of children and vanilla minded people. You get out of your dynamic what you put into it!
    Great post Sir!

    Hugs, Mynx

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