Abuse Starts At A Very Early Age

I have been in the lifestyle for more than twenty years, and I have met thousands of people. Dominants, Masters, Submissive’s, slaves, Pony Girls, puppy’s, Kitty’s , the list goes on and on.

One thing I found in common with many is a lot not all but a lot were abused at an early age. This included physical , Mental , Rape and the most being molested by family members.

Okay so I do not have any hard numbers or facts so call me a bull shitter, or say I don’t know what I am talking about , but any Dominant who has been in the lifestyle for any amount of time will also say this is true.

I am not sure why the medical Profession has caught on yet, if I have surely they can find a connection. I believe one problem is those who are seeing doctors are scared of being open, about their lifestyle, in fear the doctor may not understand.

Okay so teen suicide is up by more than 50% compared to the 70’s , but now we have troubled teens taking to the streets with guns.

So a troubled teen lives at home and he is fixing to go on a slaughter, but the parents do not have a clue, really are you serious? They are locked up in their room, with nothing to do.

It is easier to push drugs on kids to make them so they can no longer think. They walk around like zombies. Now the problem is fixed.

The one thing I have not figured out is, troubled male teens growing up seldom make it into the lifestyle as Dominants, or I have never met anyone who had such troubles.
I have however met those who were Dominant and suffered from depression which I have blogged about in the past. This is probably one of the most dangerous Dominants you can enter a relationship with. If a Dominant or any other man for that matter cannot control his own life, how can you expect him to control someone else ?

Bea who I was in a relationship with for seven yrs, she was a cutter at a very young age, and her parents knew it was drugs, and they blamed it on her friends. Her mother would stand in the bathroom with her watching her pee in a cup for a over the counter drug test kit. How fucking embarrassing is that.
All along it was her parents, they were the root of the problem. On the outside of the shell everything looked like a 1950’s home, but behind closed doors, the arguing and the fighting, the screaming, and the lack of attention, the lack of taking part in their child’s life..

Shortly after we moved in together the cutting stopped, each time I would catch her we would talk about what was going through her mind. I never told her should could not do it, I just made it clear it displeased me.

Family’s are not what they were 30 years ago. Today it takes two incomes to support a home, mostly due to greed. The huge houses, and cars, credits cards are a disease a bad cancer.

Americans as a whole are stuck on big, our cars, boats, houses , and there is nothing wrong with that, but we tend to get lost , lost in life.

Several years ago I use to drive a Taxi during season here, and I could pick up a grand a week sometimes more.
One day I dropped off at the Orlando Airport and a guy from Egypt stopped me and asked me where I was going, Daytona Beach man. How much, um for you 200 bucks, normally 150, I get half. So he jumped in.
While driving I asked what his business was, he was here to buy seven 7/11’s
okay go figure.
So I ask why so many people from the Middle East come to the US to buy business’s. He stated he did not want to offend me. I was like dude you cannot offend me.

His answer was, The American people have lost all family values, Morals, and everything is for sale including your wife.
I thought wow that is some deep shit there. So if he thinks this way, imagine how the rest of the world views us. I mean the french hate us, but who really cares about them?
So it cannot be just one man who feels that way, millions I am sure feel the same way.

I was talking to Arianna sometime ago, and I was telling her how people change. I said you know 30 years ago a bad storm hits, and a huge oak tree is knocked down in your back yard. The next morning 20 people would be there helping you clear it out.
Today 20 people would show, but they would want to know how much they are getting paid. It is true.

Instead of blaming our future, we need to take a look at us as a whole. What are we doing different than we did 30, 40 or 50 years ago.

We use to fight in school, today kids are bringing guns. Something is wrong.

This is just my opinion you can take it for what it is worth I do not have a PHD.



21 Responses to “Abuse Starts At A Very Early Age”

  1. You hit it. The foundation, core, values, morals of the home has been lost. It has been replaced with greed. There is nothing wrong with aiming for success, for a bigger car or home, but in the process we can’t neglect the time we owe our kids. And I say owe, because it is our responsibility to give them the time, attention, care that is needed for them to have a chance at being healthy, body and mind, human beings. Many complain about children or young adults now in days…but they didn’t raise themselves(well in some way, some have). They are a product of what and how they were taught to be, or lack of. Like you said, we must see what we are doing different and change it or adjust it in a way that works.

    • Singer song writer was asked two weeks ago, how much of his 300 million he was going to leave to his children.
      His answer was…… Nothing, okay it sounds bad but it really is not.
      He has taught them to be successful in life, he has taught them to take care of there selves.

      You have to teach and be there. Instead children are just giving things with out responsibility.

      It is much easier to give them money and kick them out the door, or spend hundreds on video games than to spend quality time with them.

      Thank you

      • I agree. You teach them to be successful, take care of themselves. But like you said, quality time, knowing who your kids are and recognizing when they are in trouble, is your responsibility as a parent. Quality time is the only way you will have that. We as a society are raising our future in a very dangerous way.

        Thank you for your post! It’s something I wonder and worry a lot about. I fear the world my three princesses will have to go and live in one day. *sigh*

      • Thank you, Wow three girls you have a time ahead of you.

  2. writingthebody Says:

    I agree that there is something worth looking at here. I feel too that these sorts of behaviours (me, male masochist, sub etc) are themselves protective….my shorthand for it is that my masochism saved my life. But that is to extend on where you rightly began – is this a common pattern? I suspect so. We protect our egos and selves that way. And something gets mixed up….forever. I wish it would fall away now that I do not need it, but then again, when I look at those who were not protected by these mechanisms, they suffer alcoholism, and worse. So I just don’t know.
    As for values, I am less of a believer in that aspect….if anything, a new core is being sought by the young….I think though that the abuse carries on emotionally across the generations, but in very unpredictable ways. And it continues, and is not new.

  3. My life’s work has dealt in some way or another working with disadvantaged children or young emerging adults. The shift in society’s core values is never more apparent than when working with it’s broken children. Yes, we need to get our heads out of our asses and work on our families. We need to stop thinking that money or medication is the answer. Kids spell love T-I-M-E. They do not care if it is Disneyland. They may give you crap about that time but in the end, investing yourself in their lives reaps reward far greater than the temporary inconvenience.

    I see my sons holding doors open for women and the elderly. I watch them instructing young cousins on the proper and safe way to hold a gun. I delight that they are called to babysit because they are so responsible and trustworthy. One son is a man now and my heart swells with pride when I hear him talk and know he is well respected at his work. That young man was nurtured and parented. He didn’t raise himself and we were strict. He was rebellious. He was hard. He was worth the tears. Someday he will raise children and I am fairly certain he will invest in them like we invest in him. Not with money, but with heart.

    Vile, it is important that this message gets repeated over and over. I’m glad you are sharing. You don’t need a PhD to recognize that we are slowly killing our society with greed, selfishness, and outright stupidity.

  4. one doesn’t need a piece of paper to see it, yes, you r on the money, abused kids come out a little kinkier, I think….m

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