The Definition Of BDSM Has Changed

In 1967 a book was released by an author named John Norman , and the Gorean lifestyle was born. Normans books were spread out over the years from 1967 to roughly about 1988.

While BDSM was still under ground the Gorean lifestyle was growing. Although the books were based on fantasy it was still about Dominants and women who served as Slave or Kajira.

Although the books may be about fantasy’s Dominant males and submissive females the Gorean lifestyle is alive and well.

In the past I have had the opportunity to meet couples who were in and lived the Gorean lifestyle, and I was amazed at how the female Slave, Kajira carried herself while in a public setting.

The Gorean lifestyle is not about sex, although it does take place. The lifestyle is about structure , protocols , and rules. While it is true most Gorean Masters do have more than one Slave , everyone works as a unit, a family. Everyone works to better the home the Master has provided.

Lets look at BDSM

B&D, which stands for bondage and discipline.

D/s, which stands for dominance and submission

S&M, which stands for sadism and masochism

No where in those words does it say your training starts with sucking cock , or if you take it up the ass or not. Through out the years the terminology has lost its meaning.

Somewhere we have lost much of the structure the lifestyle was once based on.

You will respect me. Respect it not something that can be demanded, Fake respect however can be, butt hat will washout in the laundry. With fake respect you have earned nothing but the dumb ass award, and showing just how childish you are.

You cannot demand submission, you can however receive Fake submission, if that is really what your looking for.

Again Fake Submission will only go so far.  If the submission is fake what are you really getting out of it , it would seem the submissive is getting even less.

This is the first time I have brought this up but I believe options are good.  Having options gives you a much bigger picture, and you have something to compare to as well.

I think dating more than one Dominant before entering a relationship would give you the bigger picture. It would also give you options.

It also gives you the chance to look at the different qualities in a Dominant, the different personality’s , and the different views when it comes to the lifestyle. Having choices is good and sometimes only having once choice is not so good.

It was sometime ago I had a post called 30 days of no fucking, keeping your legs closed and your mouth shut. The idea is to see if the Dominant is really interested in you or if he just wants a piece of ass. You are a slave or submissive, but you only submit when you choose to do so. The ball is in your court, that does not mean you are being disrespectful, that only means you are being careful, and you can do this while not letting your guard down.

Once you let your guard down you are had, then you only have a 50/50 chance of things going in the right direction. 30 days is not a long time when you are thinking about your future. It is your life you are talking about, whom you wish to submit to is up to you.

You can enter into a relationship and about two months into it you find out his life is a total wreck, problems coming out of his ass, drama, ex wife issues, kids, behind on child support, maybe a drinking problem, or even a drug problem.

A drinking problem equals a temper problem, and I promise you that is so true. If drinking impairs your driving, it does the same during play.

I am not sure why some will jump through hoops to pretend to be someone they are not. The truth is you can be who who are and no one gives it a second thought. Its when you try acting like your someone your not and people think your an idiot.

There are submissive’s who are just as bad as the fake male Dominant, there are those who have their own agenda , I call these women poison , they poison everyone they come in contact with. It is all about give me, give me this, give me that, I want, want, and want, but they give nothing in return.

Pure Poison and they will walk over who they have to , just to get what they want. Most Dominants or men in general cannot see it they are blind, and they will try and try and try, and continue to fail, and still wipe their tears and keep going, and really it is just over a piece of ass.
There is no pussy , ass , or mouth worth the stress they will put you through. The truth is when you are down and out you will be left out in the cold with no one to turn to.
If your damaged you may be able to be fixed, but if your broken, you will remain broken, well at least until you wise up and you realize the world is not about you.

I got off track there a little bit , Franco Bolli asked me some time ago why I just ragged on the Fake Dominants and never women, but he is right there are some gold digging bitches out there, who will drain you dry like a leach.

The respect thing, I have had other Male Dominants come right out and ask me if they could fuck Arianna, and I just get this blank stare from them like I am really going to answer their stupid question, or can we trade slaves for the weekend?
The someone sharing their property I never really got, or how a Dominant could just pass his property around like they are a bag of trash.
Here you go fuck her, or suck his dick make me proud , and there are some who really think this way. So some dude dumps his cum in your slave and you take her home and eat her out, really?

Your D’s or M’s relationship should not be about sex only. You want that bond between the two of you, you want that connection, that feeling, that craving.

I am not speaking about those who are married and they are venturing off into our world, they will find their own comfort zone , they will find their needs and kinks, and they will grow. Some will keep it just in the bedroom, but there are others who will grow, and continue to grow and search.

So with your new found Master your Training consist of meeting in public with a short skirt with no panties. Your not allowed to look at me eye to eye , Sucking cock, and Anal Training on cam. Oh and I almost forgot your not allowed to cum for 30 days or at times even longer.
I would like for someone to explain to me what are the benefits of the above ? What type of structure does the above provide , how does the above help you in your daily life ?

See this is not a game , if your going to suck dick , lay on your back and take it up the ass, what are you going to get out of the relationship?
You already have a vision , you already know what your looking for , but your to afraid to speak up in fear of getting dumped

Submissive, What makes you a Dominant ? Being a Dominant what do you get out of it ? Do you have any on going problems ? If divorced is there any drama with your ex ? Do you have a drinking problem or any type of drug problem ?
What are the goals you have for your property ? What type of structure do you plan on providing ? Are you going to require me to do something that could cause me to lose my job or family ? Will I be allowed to see my family and friends ?
How many D’s or M’s relationships have you been in and what happened ?
The list of questions just go on and on and on, and the funny thing is they are all in the back of your mind but your to scared to ask them again in fear of being dumped.

You could avoid a huge mess just by asking a few questions.

Why do I have to suck your cock to prove I am submissive ?

Never allow someone to disrespect you, never allow someone to use you unless it is on your terms.
You deserve the best life has to offer you do not have to settle for less..

I have a saying. I want the world and everything that comes with it, and the truth is today and everyday I feel like I have it, and you can as well.

train

Vile

6 Responses to “The Definition Of BDSM Has Changed”

  1. Do you mind if I repost this as a link on my personal blog on tumblr? I think you bring up good points about D/s rather elegantly. P.S. I also run a submissives only discussion blog if that sheds some light on why various opinions are interesting to me.

  2. Reblogged this on thekinkyworldofvile and commented:

    I believe this to be true

  3. Awww.. I was hoping you would go keep going with the Gorean lifestyle stuff. I like the depth of that world. If you are into Star Trek or Lord of the Rings, you know the whole world and everything in it. Goreans are like that. Interesting stuff, that.

    I wonder what percentage of people are drawn to BDSM, simply because of sexual desires, and what percent are more about the DS or SM aspects.

    • I have much respect about the Gor lifestyle even though it is based on a book.
      The gorean lifestyle is not based on sex like much of BDSM is.
      Gorean households usually have multiple slaves with each having their own task.
      We call it poly but with Gor the slaves are dedicated to only one house , where as poly for the most see’s multiple partners and at times out of the house.
      Many times those who are poly do not live in the same home.
      Many times the submissive may see more than one Dominant.
      My question has always been how does a Dominant keep control of his house? How does a submissive follow more than one dominant ?

      • Going biblical here – Matthew 6:24 – No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other.

        I don’t agree that you have to love one and hate the other, but parallel power structures simply do not work. I know. I’ve seen its failures. A power structure, to succeed, MUST but be a pyramid, with one at the top.

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