Get Your Fuck On
Finding the right partner is very important , in our kinky world of BDSM it is more important because our needs tend to be much different than Ward and June Clever.
Dominants come in so many different flavors , just as Baby Girls , slaves and those who are submissive. What ever your kink or fetish is you are sure to find someone to meet your needs.
Last night while on the evil Facebook I received a message from a little , while I am not going to share any names , she did ask me for a little advice.
She had met someone on Fetlife which is an awesome place to go if you want to make friends and learn , there are groups for every kind of kink you can think of and more you have never even heard of, and it gives you the opportunity to find local people and groups as well.
She feels she has a bond with this Daddy Dom, she feels safe while with him , they get along very well, so you would think all is good on the home front when it comes to building a relationship. Yea I do not think so , and the reason being is when we meet someone we need to know that we have the whole pie and not just half or 3/4’s , you want the whole thing. If you are not getting the whole pie then your needs are not being met.
he went on to explain he is everything I need and want except , He is not as commanding or primal as I need him to be. Bam she just answered her own question. See she would not be getting the whole pie.
She went on to say she did not want to communicate her needs in fear of losing what she has already. That is another bad sign if you do not feel comfortable enough to communicate your needs and feelings.
Ladies communication is they key, communication will open all doors to the success of your relationship , communication will help you grow as well as your relationship. If you cannot fully communicate and be open about your feelings , then you cannot fully submit, again only half of the pie.
I told her to make a list of her needs and stick with it , do not alter or bend , because if you do , again only half of the pie.
I remember sherri my first slave , she was primal but only receiving , I grabbed her hair onetime and slapped her and she said again , so I slapped her face again she said harder , and I continued until she hit the ground when she hit the floor she squirted all over the place and just laid there shaking. She was very extreme to extreme for even me.
The first time I fisted her my hand was in her pussy past my wrist and as I started pumping her she started slapping herself and when she came her pussy clamped down on my hand so tight I thought she was going to break it. Primal that was a need for her., and it was a need I could not be there for. Our relationship lasted almost seven years.
Chong , her thing was anal sex , she loved being fucked up the ass , and that was the only way she could cum , that was a new experience to me , but every mans dream. Anal sex was a need to her and believe it or not there were a lot of men who were not into ass fucking.
You want this , you want that , you want and want and what , but what do you need ? Put all of your wants to the side and think about your needs. Then you will find the one who fits like a glove.
My needs were as follows. I wanted total control , I wanted total control over everything in our life. The other need was someone I could communicate with and someone who could communicate with me. I love to be rimmed so finding someone who liked was very important. I needed someone who loved to suck cock , foot worship . These were ll needs to me and I was not going to bend just so I could get some pussy. So for almost two years I took care of things with my own two hands.
Being able to get your fuck on is being able to feel not only comfortable , but safe and knowing you can talk about anything , knowing your limits will be respected.
I think one problem is not being able to separate lust from liking or loving someone because both gives you the same feelings, the only problem is lust is short term.
You have to have a plan before entering a relationship if you don’t you will lose every time and you spend more time looking that you do in an actual relationship…
You can tell if the Dominant is playing the Intimidation card when you first meet , if that is the case thank him for his time and get up and leave. You have to become friends first , your first and maybe your second meeting should not have anything to do with BDSM. It would seem you would want the Dominant to get to know you as a person first then you move in to different areas as you grow.
You need to be able to communicate if you cannot you will never be able to open other doors or fully submit.