My Life ,My House

 

 

Even I up until about 2 months ago had a Mentor, someone I could turn to if I did not have an answer. Animel passed away and I had no clue until I received a call from someone I knew not a friend just a acquaintance. I had known Animel for some 20 plus years and although I did not agree with everything he shared he was a book of knowledge. So here lately Ive kinda been out of it and it seems the smallest things get on my nerves. I do not get angry but I suppose the word would be irritated.  The other night I reached out to someone else and I knew immediately it was a mistake and I cut it off before I even got started. I reached out to a Master R and was told basically to go fuck myself but no hard feelings I just really needed to vent , venting Ive been doing for a couples of weeks and most everyone that knows me has seen the difference , the other half just think its me being me.

Calling Animel , he would answer and I would hear my phone rang and I looked at it and the caller ID said Dick Head. Then what the fuck do you want I don’t have all day ? The thing is I could talk and I knew it would not go anyplace. Sometimes I took his advice and at times I took a little of his and added a little of mine.

I am not into having cookouts with the smiths , I guess mainly we have absolutely nothing in common. I am not into sports or talking about other people. I am pretty much a loner until I get around like minded people.

Most people who meet me their first opinion is I am self centered , obnoxious , loud and rude , none caring , non empathetic, man I could go on and on but I wont. Arianna and I have talked about this very subject and she calls it confidence.

I get attached to some for what ever reason , its not like a love thing but more of a inner spiritual  connection on my part. Then and only then are you a true friend someone I would bend over backwards to help. This has only happened three times in my 54 years.

However there is a exception but there always is a exception. I enjoy helping people but I only help those who are trying to help themselves. I ask for nothing but in the back of my mind I am thinking if down the road I should need help those would step up to the plate.

I have been there , I was listening to a speech the other day and it was stated your life is a frame of mind. You can take someone who has lost everything and with the right state of mind they would bounce back full steam ahead.  If you expect someone to just open the door and fix your fuck ups then it will never happen.

Our community is very small compared to the over all population but today it is a dog eat dog world. Depending on who your speaking with most of the time I feel like picking up the phone and calling CNN.

I am a man who will drop everything at the drop of a hat if someone needs help , but as I have aged , Ive learned to only help those who are willing to help themselves.

I am a Drama free man , and I will not allow anyone to bring any drama to my home or my girls , this includes family. There are times when you have to cut ties even when someone is very close to you. Drama is a sickness , drama is a cancer and there are those who not only want it to spread but it is a need to them in order to survive.

BDSM today is more about the kink side of things , men wanting pussy and most subs or slaves trying to find that security and structure. You can play the game but if you do not know the rules you cannot win. BDSM has always been about kink but some try to hide that fact , but there are others who want to take a different path , there are those who are sincere about their Dominance or their submission.

So I use the word Mastery , the Master , the Dominant being able to put a solid plan into action and following through with good intentions. Mastery being able to enter someones head , someones train of thought. Getting in someones head is the easy part staying there is a total different story.

Mastery having the ability to stay consistent on a daily basis , being able to communicate, being able to listen , being able to maintain your control and anger.

I am against Domestic violence of any kind be it physical , verbal , or mental. Domestic Violence does not always mean a male there are women who are just as abusive.

Our relationship is 100% consensual , our relationship was negotiated prior to entering a relationship. We entered the relationship as master and slave. That brings back that state of mind. You have to need you can want but the need has to be there.

I like structure , I thrive on structure , I thrive on having a plan. Arianna and Lynns plans are planned a month in advance. Both have calendars , and the first of each month both start adding dates to doctors appointments and free time as well. Before making any type of request both come to me and ask , this is to make sure I do not have plans. My calendar is in my head.

I work from home and for the job I do and money I make I am paid very well. Arianna and Lynn work outside of the home.

My morning starts roughly around 4.10 am Arianna walks into the room after the coffee is made and wakes me , sometimes its not so easy but I do get up and the three of us sit and have coffee. Arianna has to be at work by 5.45am. I walk Arianna out to the car and when I enter the bedroom a fresh glass of ice water is waiting on me and Lynn heads off back to bed. Shortly after Arianna calls and we talk while she is driving to work. This has been the same for 4.5 years now. At 6am I lay back down and sleep until about 8am and I wake this is my down time so to speak but I know my day is just beginning. I go to the office and log into work around 10.45am go through my emails and stats. 11am I being and I work until 10pm. The good thing is I only work Saturday through Tuesday. 10pm I log off , then I relax until about 12am then I crash.

By Wednesday I am a wired fool , I am strung out and ready to go. I am one who jokes a lot and many times when I say something they will look to Arianna for the truth, or while talking they are waiting for the punch line. I am a true conservative with just at ouch of Democrat . I am not politically correct , I speak my mind but many times I will not give any type of opinion because the topic is not worth even getting involved. If it is something I truly believe in then I will speak up. I am not going to get all political on you I am just sharing my state of mind.

In order to have a M’s home run like a fine tuned machine you have to be able to take a look into the slaves mind , you have to stay one step ahead of the thoughts and emotions, yea it sounds like a lot of work but the fact is it is really pretty easy if you are willing to donate the time needed. Another factor is you have to care , you must want to see growth, you must be supportive during not just the good but the bad.

There was a post on fetlife in a group and Arianna asked permission to post a comment, I said yes of course. As we know fetlife is full of drama and those who are new to the lifestyle cringe at the thought of asking a question because all of the others who know everything pounces on the question like Piranhas. Arianna stays away from such childish antics.

The question was

Opinion: A Slave’s Compass

From time to time I am somewhat shocked when I read a answer Arianna has posted in a conversation or even reading her blog just after a fresh post at times I really scratch my head.

Arianna’s answer

VilesArianna:

I love the analogy. In my life, I find that when the focus is on my Master, other things seem less important. There’s a freedom in prioritizing ones life in one direction. There’s always an answer. I wear an engraved bracelet that states, WWMD, ( what would Master do?). This reminds me that my actions both public and private reflect my submission. Another bracelet is engraved, VKA, Vile knows all. This isn’t because he’s egotistical but because in my submission there are no secrets. My likes, needs, wants and desires, even thoughts are to be known to my Master. I strive to be complete in my submission. My submission is no longer mine to give but once accepted it became a need. The need to continue my commitment to Him.

It was easy for me to walk down the path of slavery. My Master portrayed confidence, intrigue, intelligence, and insightful questions. He challenged me to look past my own definitions and become His definition. So, His needs became my wants. His wants became my desires. His desires became my goals. It was an AHA moment when I released my own vision of what slavehood should look like and adopted His. That was hard because I wanted to give more and more. I trust that although I need to anticipate His needs that He will not allow me to continue once His own definition of Mastery is completed. In other words, I had to let go of my ambitious ways that were intruding into His ideal vision and release my own desires and adopt His even if the picture was different.

The compass is a great picture of ones truth. The stronger the bond, the deeper the connection, and the freedom in adopting another’s life as their own is a wonderful achievement in my own journey. For us, it works and each day I can look forward to having a focus in the turbulent seas of life because I have found my compass.

Thank you
~arianna

 

I did reblog her post from last night and again after reading it left me scratching my head causing me to think even deeper.

https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/

It will act like the link is broken from my phone anyway but just click on the title and everything will work fine.

If you the Dominant take the lifestyle and your relationship serious the world is yours no questions asked. If you truly love someone why would you not provide the time needed?

Everything in our relationship is based on my decision , its not to say I never ask for advice because I do and many times I take the advice giving , but in the end I have the final say.

Again everything is on my terms even when it comes to sex it is about me and only me at that time. I find it hard to use the words making love its hard to focus when I have these thoughts because I know at times it is needed but I am about taking what is mine. Once I start I hit every hole and at times more than once and Ill fuck until I cant fuck anymore. I love anal sex to me that is the most submissive act a slave or submissive can offer her most private part.

A submissive or slave not only wants but has the need to please , this is something that comes natural we as Dominants just have to file off the rough edges.. You put the work in that is needed and the rewards are far greater than you can imagine. What you have is a relationship that is consensual instead of intimidation and fear.

A relationship based on fear or intimidation is a one sided relationship and will be short lived.

If anyone has questions feel free to ask  it can be personal or maybe just advice , I am currently trying to figure out how to do some audio files..

Much Love to everyone who has stopped by….. I truly appreciate everyone.

 

Vile

7 Responses to “My Life ,My House”

  1. I love what you say about Drama. Its the other side of “finding your happiness”. I tend to talk about taking responsibility for your own happiness, about learning to find your happiness in accomplishment, from your failures, and your successes.. Drama is what happens when people fail at this.. when they attache to the negatives, when someone else is always responsible for their mood. I need to remember that.. that drama is the other choice.

    Not surprising that you had a mentor..though after 20 years he was more of a sounding board and a confidant. It was the way of things. My condolences. The loss of a confidant is huge.. everyone needs someone who will give it to you straight.

  2. missagathaarmstrong Says:

    Sir – there must be a hole – maybe not huge and gapping – but a hole nontheless…

    I have not been able to read all of this as i am work and i am in a filthy mood – not angry – just unbelievably irratated – even by my colleages breathing – they are very irratating… but i shall keep you till this evening and read propertly.

    but for now – to lose a person like mentor in ones life – it is hard and it is difficult … and i am sorry x

    • You are right there must be a hole any hole , it depends on my mood or I may decide to play a round of golf.
      I dislike people that is mostly why I work from home.
      People get on my nerves really easy and I guess it all in circles stupid….

      • missagathaarmstrong Says:

        Dear Sir – i really do know exactly… humans annoy me terribly – and on the most part i would much rather be hidden away… Gardening is for me – not a golfer…

  3. TheMane Says:

    Vile, thank you for your work. It is very helpful for me as I work to comprehend, and subsequently understand BDSM and my role as a dominant. I am twenty three years old and attracted to the lifestyle, but I have no desire to jump into this blindly.

    You are providing perspective by relating your experience with us faceless masses. As a young male struggling to accept the Self in a world of Post Modernism I find your blog refreshing.

    Thank you.

    • Thank you for stopping by , thank you for your comment but most of all I am glad you got something out of my blog, While I am not always right or my way may not work for you, there are bits and pieces some can use

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: