Training A Slave To Fit Your Needs

You have to have great appreciation for your slave ,in a way you have to love and cherish probably more than your slave will love you. The slave in today’s world probably works a full time job , then comes home and another job begins. However the work at home is more than likely more intense once home than at work.

Depending on the master there is a breaking process, some are extreme while some not so much but you have to be able to bring out the humble that is within the slave. My philosophy is if you break it you gotta fix it.

I have mentioned in other post the importance of getting to know the slave, the importance of knowing the slave better than family and friends and better than the slave knows themselves.

Knowing who you are , how much control you want, how much responsibility  you want, and how much care. Are you strict ? Are you easy going? Are you looking to take full control of someones life? Are you more service orientated, into humiliation, pain?

While sex is not my main driver in a M’s relationship  it does play a part and sex has to be compatible. Both have to be on the same page and both have to talk about sexual needs before entering a relationship.

If you are going to put rules and protocols in place you need to follow through on a daily basis. If you are going to take full ownership there is no what I call downtime , while I do allow my slave to have days just so she can unwind , relax and clear her head, my days are much different. I have no what I call true friends , I do have friends but no one I can really confide in , maybe sit down for a couple of beers or have a in dept  conversation about training. One of the subjects I have been studying for sometime is hypnosis but this is only a me thing. I have practiced on my slave and have been successful there is really no one to talk to. In the community I know a great deal many people but talking to someone and having to worry about something getting out is not something I want to deal with. I actually spend more time speaking with what I do call friends who live overseas , yea I know weird but it works.

I was really young when my kink first came to light , maybe 13 or 14 with a girl my same age. I spoke about her probably seven years ago and I am going to correct what I called her. I called her the school whore but the word whore was really pretty bad so I am going to replace it with the word slut. Just because someone is a slut is not a bad thing , it just means they have a huge sex drive, maybe slut is a word that does not fit but anyway.

Beverley was the first girl I tied up , spanked fucked and face fucked, yea she talked so I did not date very much while in school but she was a regular hookup for several years. The more we saw each other the more extreme we were even to the point of fisting, and wow the first time my hand vanished deep inside her pussy wow! I remember once my hand was fully inside and opening it and feeling all around inside her pussy , it was just amazing.

So while I was kinky and I wanted to be in control , I had no idea what I was doing. At that time is was hunt , fuck and move on.

To the slave, why do you want to be a slave ? What was it that drew you to this lifestyle? Something you read , maybe talking to someone, a movie? What type a slave are you ? Are you more about service? Are you a slave but a masochist ? This is something you have to figure out to insure you find the right match because not one master is the same.

Questions that are seldom asked of the slave is about health , be it physical or the most important mental. Medications the slave is on and why they are on them and what they are for. You as a master are responsible for doing research and it should give you a greater understanding on just how far you can go when it comes to play and that being physical and mental to include pain. If you break it you may not be ale to fix it and you could find yourself answering questions to law enforcement.

As a slave you have to have a need not a want because if it is just a want then while you are training there will be some internal fighting and will case you to resist to a point or you may find you are objecting to most.

Being mentally prepared having your mind right knowing you are about to step off a cliff and expect someone you trust to catch you.

The master must know the slave , the master must know the slave better than the slave knows themselves. You have to know the slaves limitations and something many look over are medications. What type of medications is the slave taking? Does the slave suffer from any type of depression? If so then this may alter your training program some. Remember if you break it you have to fix it and depression may not be something you can fix. I have found over the years those who do suffer from some type of depression are much better suited to be a service slave. Working with a masochist is this a area you have experience in?  The truth not many who are masochist are slaves just as not many who are sadist are actual master. Their pleasure comes from inflicting pain and humiliation.

Training a slave is really not as difficult as many think but it does take a lot of work and going into a relationship you really have to have a game plan. Some ask me about rules when they first meet a slave and my answer is you cannot give out rules until you know the slave. Rules are for the betterment of the slave and this does not include not being allowed to wear panties. I have found over the years that protocols can actually take the place of many rules although some see both as the same.

The one thing many look over is negotiating the relationship and if you do not it can cause a lot of confusion and trouble because you just cannot make shit up as you go.

I have standards when it comes to upkeep. I dress nice when out but I expect my slave to look 100 times better at all times. It is the masters responsibility on how the slave presents their selves when out. A slave is a direct reflection of the master and the masters training.

I had a list, a list of my needs when it comes to ownership and if the answer was no to anything on my list the conversation was over. The slaves needs are different, you have clothing, food, and a place to sleep anything else is a privilege and privileges can be earned or taken away.

Negotiations should include how much control the master wants to take, how much freedom to take and give. Sex is on your terms and your terms only after all it is about you the master. The slave must agree to your terms and speak the word I agree out loud not just by nodding. If you like anal sex and the slave does not and is not willing to compromise then the slave is not for you. If the slave does not swallow and it is a requirement for you , then the slave is not the right one for you. Do not give in to any of your needs.

The slave will come back with a list of needs besides the three basic. You the master must agree, if you say no and the slave does not agree then the slave is not the right one for you.

The slave has rights , the slave has the right to be able to communicate openly 24/7 to include waking you at night. The slave has the right to communicate freely without being judged and you the master must listen. This includes during your busy day, if the slaves sends a text you are to respond it only takes a few seconds.

A part time master cannot expect full time submission.

Ok you are taking a human and you are changing their train of thought, you are changing their habits, you are changing their needs. Needs in my eyes are four simple things. Food, water , clothing and a place to live. These are absolute needs

Training is about being consistent hourly, daily, weekly and monthly and so on. Once you begin the training there must be no interruptions. My thoughts on LDR these are extremely  hard because if you cannot reach out and touching someone you really do not have any control over someone, you have the control you are being told you have and nothing more..

You have a vision on how you see your daily life , you envision your home, you are the master , living with your slave. One thing, if you are looking for a slave then look for a slave. Your search should not include a submissive or a baby girl, a brat nor a switch. You are looking for a slave and nothing less.

One of the first words out of your mouth should be privilege. Everything you allow the slave to do or have is a privilege and privileges can be taken away at anytime. This is one area of the relationship the slave has control, privileges are in the slaves court and the slave controls the outcome.

You as the master having a clear game plan and knowing what your expectations are is a must. You can not just go in winging it or playing by ear. Once you start training it is really hard to make changes and this is mainly because you have already set the pace.

Strip, standing right there and strip as she walked through the door. Hand me you cell , your purse. In today’s the cell has become a part of life so allowing the slave to check a couple of times a day is important , maybe family friends, emails and so on but limited time.

You may sit here and here but not here or here. You are not allowed at anytime to sit on my furniture , you do not have that right. See what I did there? I have taking what once was normal freedoms and taken them away. Everything in a slaves life is a privilege and privileges  can be taken away at anytime.

Dinner time you may sit on the floor next to me , you do not have the right to sit on a chair, you are the slave remember? You will not begin to eat before I take my first bite,then and only then may you begin to eat and after the first bite you will thank me.

When you sit you will sit with both legs closed and hands placed on your lap, you will never cross your legs , you are not permitted to do so. When you stand and you are speaking or not your hands will be clasped in the front hanging in front of you.

You will ask permission to sit on my floor , you will ask permission to stand , to go to the bathroom , to get a drink or water , to shower and to enter the bed.

Here is the key as masters we can only make a informed decision based on the information given to us, if you do not communicate your feelings I cannot read your mind. If you ask a slave a direct question you expect a direct answer, if something goes wrong and the slave did not communicate the problem is clearly the slaves fault.

I have three main protocols in place while out. Protocol one, the slave may speak freely, two the slave may speak when spoken to and three speaking is not permitted.

My slave does not wear clothes while at home, she is not permitted  and does not have that right. If requested such as cooking or taking the dogs out I allow.

In the beginning of your relationship after you have agreed to enter one,  Use your slave this is your right. Guide the slave to the bedroom place them on the edge of the bed and tell them to spread. You fuck , bust a nut and walk away after you have finished. You and use often many times without saying a word. I have my slave trained I just tap on the back of the head and she knows it is time to suck dick, if I tap twice she knows to go all the way down and hold it until I grab a hand full of hair and pull her up.  If I want pussy I take pussy if I want the ass I take the ass but I do without giving any indication until I start.

All of the above is done in repetition , hourly, daily , weekly and so on.  You must remain consistent and what you have done over the past 90 days or so is changing the slaves mindset and taking old habits and replacing with habits you want in place. Just because a slave makes a mistake but not mean the slave should be punished after all the slave is human and even masters makes mistakes.  Punishments do not always include physical punishment. There is a mindset that if a slave breaks a rule which seldom happens then we must beat them.

The Collar is very sacred to me and I hold it above a wedding ring. The collar shows ownership , you own your slave , you own property. While negotiating find out what kind of collar would be suitable for everyday wear.

Myself I use a Turian collar  which for the most is Gorean and it locks with a allen screw. I am the only one with the wrench to remove it. Arianna has worn it for almost 7 years and it has never been off her neck. She wears to work and is out in public and in 7 years has been asked about it 3 or 4 times. She simply replies it is like a wedding ring and nothing else is said.

A collar is earned not giving , if it is just giving there is no appreciation

I do not believe in under consideration collars or training collars. I did make a leather one I put on Arianna when we went to events so others would know she was taking. Many today run down to the local pet store and purchase a dog collar and give it with no meaning. Most wear the collar as a trophy or to be able to stand out , maybe play.

Leave sex off the table until you get to know the slave, as a matter of fact let the slave bring the topic up when it comes to sex, kink and bondage as well as fetishes.

Shut up and listen

Start with a blank canvas and build what you need.

Fetlife you can find me

I_Vile_Own_Her

 

Vile

 

 

 

10 Responses to “Training A Slave To Fit Your Needs”

  1. As always Vile, and very insightful and informative post. I also have no friends with which I can speak with about the lifestyle, thoughts, ideas, etc. I have a few friends I drink with, but none that would understand or be able to offer any insight.

    I have never been a fan of long distance DS relationships as I don’t consider than true DS relationships. Both people are only participating part time and over text message with an occasional phone call. I’m not sure they are investing themselves completely in the relationship, though maybe that is what they want.

    I agree about the collar. I had Angels collar special made. It can be removed but that was done specifically for times when I’m not with her. She has to remove it at the chiropractor mostly but she does occasionally travel solo and will need to remove it going through security. That being said, people do give out collars much too fast. It’s almost like: “Hi how are you? You like DS? Here, where this collar. You are now mine and must do as I say.” No real meaning to it.

    Thank you for taking the time to post your thoughts and ideas.

  2. A long read but every bit worth it.

    The one area I diverge is on the three collars, which you probably know about me. I would agree with Jadow.. too many “velcro” collars out there. I think the “fix” for velcro collars is the three collars.

    I like to promote the value of the three collars… consideration, training, and final.. because each marks another step in the negotiations and responsibility you both have accepted.

    That being said.. I totally agree on the value of the final collar.. it should be of greater value than a wedding ring.. its why we celebrate every 4th of July.. My slave and I recognize this is a vow and a commitment of great importance to both of us.

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