Archive for the Arianna Category

Fifty Shades Darker

Posted in abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Cheating Dominant, Christian Grey, commitment, communication, Dominant, Fifty Shades Darker, Fifty Shades Of Gray, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Married Dominant, Master and slave relationship, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, The Secretary, Uncategorized, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , on August 2, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Most Doms or Masters have skills many skills , be it play , communication , staying consistent in training among other things but one very important skill is the skill to negotiate a relationship.

I was somewhat taken back by the first 50 shades so when 50 shades darker came out , I thought okay Mr Grey can redeem himself.. Well that did not happen , instead he lowered himself to almost animal waste.

I do give credit for the books and the movies though it brought millions into the lifestyle some serious and to some they found out it was just a fantasy.

It is not uncommon to renegotiate a contract be it written or verbal. We continue to grow on a daily basis and our needs change. A Dominant may see where some changes are needed and may just act or he may sit down and communicate his needs. The Submissive or Slaves needs may change and may want to sit down and request some changes. I myself do not make a decision right then I want to take some time to think about what was discussed.

To see Mr Grey kneel about beg was truly disappointing , although we as Masters should show the ability to be humble at times, what Mr Grey did was truly humiliating to see him beg. On his knees admitting he was not a Dominant but still wanting to renegotiate , renegotiate what?

Most women loved the sex scenes , some were pretty intense but to put those into our world of BDSM just gives a false look into the way we live.

Outside of the movie jumping into real life, suck my dick , you broke a rule you burnt my chicken now ive got to beat you , or you failed to send my pics while your at work. I want videos of you masturbating , I want your passwords , I want your banking info. This is no way the characteristics of a Dominant , this is pure ego , insecure , the need to abuse and think its alright because your in charge.

Our life is so deep very few understand even those like E.L. James who tried her best to let people take a peak into our life. If you do not live something you cannot write about it.  Our life has such a wide base many do not understand but are very intrigued. People trying to interpret our life would be like me trying to write a book on how a nuclear submarine , hows its built and keeps generating power.

I have changed over the years , I have been the abuser , I have been the user , I have made false promises , I have giving false hope. Many years I felt women were just a dumping station many had no faces. My only concern was how to use all three holes.

The art of manipulation and for some it never ends , its a game that is never won , because in the end you crawl into your bed alone. This goes for both male and female, one thing we all have to remember we are a commodity and the older we get the less our stock is worth. Manipulation is not hard but staying on that path with one does not last very long.

Any man can find someone to suck his cock , or take it up the ass but to be able to take control , and finding someone who will give up the amount of control you want is an art. It meaning days , weeks , months and in some cases years to find the one who fits your needs , Dominant or Submissive.  Hours of conversation , days, weeks , months getting to know each other.

The Dominant must be secure , the Dominant must know who and what he is, the Dominant must know how to be fair, true and loyal to his word. The Dominant must make it clear when it comes to his needs and wants.

When you meet a Dominant and you are explained his needs and wants , how he runs his house and what is expected , if you have any doubts or your not able to fulfill his needs then he is not the right Dominant for you. If he backs down on anything he has presented and gives in , there will come a time when the subject will come up at a later date. The same goes for the submissive if you lay out your needs and the Dominant disagrees then you need to move on. You may meet 25 , 30 , 40 or even 50 Dominants before you find the right fit. You know within the first couple of minutes if you are compatible and if your not why even continue?

More of the community today is about kink and only kink , but there are just as many submissives and slaves who are looking for so much more. Most who are submissive are looking for much more when it comes to a relationship , although kink will play a huge part there are many other factors. Many are looking for security , communication , wanting to turn over power to someone they can trust.  Guidance is huge , structure , and yes even discipline when a rule is broken, being held accountable , but many who claim to be a Dom , or Master turn their backs on the basic ideology of the lifestyle , trying to convince the submissive they know the way.

Making a movie that is realistic , instead of a kinky Billionaire begging some girl for pussy why not a average guy? If the dude had lived in a trailer and worked at McDonalds then he would of been a creep.

You know if you just want to fuck why not just ask instead of trying to run a game , if your married why not be upfront instead of hiding your marriage like some little bitch. Ive met married Doms who cheat and once they get home they turn into the bitch. If the dude cant run his own home , if the dude cant control his wife or his house , if the dudes wife wont submit , then how in the fuck can he truly control someone else? The dude is living a fantasy , the dude wants to find someone to do things his wife wont do. Dont get me wrong there are some who are ok with seeing a fake married Dom and if both are ok with the situation then do it, but if you are married and misleading someone your balls needs to be cut off because your a pussy.

I hoped before watching the first 50 shades that someone would step up and show a true side of the lifestyle but I learned in the first 30 minutes it had nothing to do with a real Dominant but a man with control issues who suffered from depression, a man who wanted to hurt someone just for the sake of hurting someone.  A quote, Why do you want to hurt me? For your pleasure , really? Yea he said that.

Many do not take into consideration of the damage you can do to someone male or female. Leading someone down a false path and once your caught they put the blame on them like its their fault.

Guys , Masters , Dominants if you are who you claim to be you can live the dream, if you walk the walk and talk the talk, hmmm I think that is right? Your life could grown into something you cant even imagine. There is so much more to the relationship , its not about just sucking cock , or fucking some chick up the ass, it take work but the end result would be incredible…

Vile

 

 

 

My Cocoon And Fucking

Posted in Arianna, ass fucking, ass to mouth, bdsm, Bondage, Dominant and Submissive, Humiliation, Rough Sex, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Throat Fucking with tags , , , , on June 28, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Some days I sit back and think about how it all started , how over the years I went through this crazy transformation, how I was different and did not really fit in.

I grew up with a very dysfunctional family , always fighting , I mean fighting throwing punches not me but my parents , real hand to hand combat. Addiction to pain pills and binge drinking and yet I still for the most managed to stay mostly unnoticed.

I had no idea where I was going or how I would turn out but I knew what I did not want to be and that was like my parents.

The age of I am thinking 13 we moved to a little hick town one of our many moves and I remember my first day of school the 6th grade. Meeting the principle and him walking me to my first period class. As the door opened to the classroom , my first thoughts were holy fucking shit ,what the fuck have my parents done now ? Crew cuts , cowboy boot , army style hair cuts and overhauls.

My hair was almost to my waist and I was thinking this would never work , now I fit in less. I was right for about the first 6 months , the guys mostly ignored me but the girls for the most was pretty friendly. Sitting in class who ever sat behind me would braid my hair.

I remember one of the guys making fun of me because I had been wearing the same pair of jeans to school for 6 months , again my parents were pretty much useless but at 13 I had to do something about it.

Right across the street from us was a restaurant called the Skyline Cafe a little mom and pop place that was always busy. I walked over one day and asked the owner if there was anything I could do to make a little money. The next day I was washing dishes after school making 2.01 an hour. I started at 2.30pm and worked until 10.30 and still getting up for school. At the age of 13 I was making like 90 bucks a week so it was time to make some changes.

Family Discount , they were good for selling clothes that were seconds , meaning when finished something did not pass inspection. In about 3 weeks I had a closet full of clothes.

At the age of 15 I went to work at a cotton mill , and I was trained to work on a thread machine, now I was making 4.91 an hour and soon 6 dollars an hour making more than either one of my parents. I was working second shift and still going to school and at home I pretty much stayed to myself , locked in my room with my Tv and Boom box.

One day this was a few years back I got nosy and while my parent were gone I went into their bedroom and started going through their stuff not really looking for anything. Then I found this box under the bed full of paperback books. I sit down and started reading and I was thinking holy fuck what the fuck? Books like the daughter next door , the Babysitter, but they all had one thing in common. They are all about nasty degrading fucking. Rough humiliating sex , face fucking , stretching the ass with massive cocks, pulling hair and yes bondage. I fucking struck gold , I took two of the books and off to my room I went. Jumping in bed pulling my pants off and just started reading and jacking off. I now have learned about the birds and the bees. I knew what sex was and , and how a girl wanted to be treated.

Over a short period of time when I first started working one thing I noticed that was different was my confidence it was off the chain. I had changed , I was more out going, more out spoken and could walk up to a girl and strike up a conversation.

My biggest thing was what was called leisure suits with bell bottoms. I had a different color suit for every day of the week , and silk shirts but lets not forget the platform shoes. I felt like a rock star and the feeling was good instead of walking there was somewhat of a strut.

Riding the bus home one day I found myself sitting next to a girl named Beverly , she was not that pretty but had a fucking body that would derail a train. Talking and she invited me over to her house one Saturday. When she answered the door my jaw dropped she was wearing this short tee shirt and nothing under although I did not notice until in her bedroom and she sat one the bed. Here was my chance to put everything I had learned to work after all from reading I knew everything about sex.

Spread your legs so I can see your cunt bitch, the look in her eyes was a true Kodak moment but she did, grabbing her hair and shoving two fingers in her going as deep as I could I started pounding her. Standing up I dropped my pants grabbed her by her and to her knees shoving my cock in her mouth I began fucking her. What a fucking feeling , what a fucking rush. It was like two minutes and I blew my load. Once I let go Beverly sat back and just said holy fuck. I pulled my pants back up and said I gotta go and I just walked out. That was the beginning of my travels , that was the change, that is what got me to where I am today.

The next time I saw Beverly we went into the woods but I had something different in mind , this times I had rope with me and I was looking for the perfect spot , the perfect trees. Ahh there we go I placed her between two trees and told her to get naked. Without any hesitation in a matter of seconds she was butt ass naked. Grabbing one wrist I tied it with rope and attached it to a tree, then the other wrist. Sitting back I got this kinda evil feeling running through me and I walked behind her and took my belt off, remember the books , I knew what she wanted. I stood back and grabbed my belt the buckle in one hand and smack right across her ass then again and again until her ass was blood red and she did not say a word. I walked up behind her puling her ass towards me just bent over a little dropping my pants and I shoved my cock in her pussy yea the first time. Fucking seemed like forever , I guess because my mind was racing, I pulled out and found her ass and right in I went, then it was only seconds I blew my load. As I was fucking her ass I reached up and grabbed her throat and squeezed tight that is when I blew. Stepping back and looking I was thinking what power , I just took what I wanted.

Walking in class I would walk up to her and tell her to meet me behind the gym at lunch. On your knees, I would fuck her mouth cum and tell her to go eat. She always did what I told her and without question.

The bad thing is girls talk so reaching high school I did not date very much. There were a few but those were short lived. One or two outings and I was just ignored until I met Shannon , Shannon was a small little chunky blonde who had a ass sent straight from heaven and there was one thing I knew I had to have it. She had very pale skin and deep blue eyes , very soft spoken , quiet . She like me was a loner we stayed to ourselves , so we kinda hit it off. She to was much like Beverly , but Shannon was different her and I actually talked , played games together you know fun stuff but the sex was fucking incredible I could do pretty much anything I wanted to. Our relationship lasted about a year, there was no bondage just straight out fucking. The mouth , pussy and ass , she really hated being fucked in the ass but she took it. I knew she did not like being fucked in the ass but it was not about her it was about me , so once again I was dumped but it did not matter because Beverly was my go to girl. It felt incredible because I had this sense of power over her. I could treat her like shit and she would come at the snap of a finger. Beverly was my first ass to mouth. Fucking her ass pulling out shoving my cock in her mouth and back in her ass.

As I said my parents were drunks , both took turns going in and out of rehab , both had been hospitalized for drug over dose multiple times.

I was getting ready to turn 17 and a Army recruiter came to our high school , while listening to the spill I had one thing in mind and that was get the fuck out. One friday the recruiter stopped by and picked me up and I went down to take a test , the next week at high school I was told I passed. So I left with a huge file getting home I waited till dinner once finished I started talking about going to camp. I had to talk early because one or both would soon be passed out. Summer camp is where I wanted to go so I put the papers on the table everything marked in yellow , yea just sign here and here and here.

That night I went to a phone booth and made the call telling him my parents had signed everything. October 14th the age of 17 the car pulled up in front of out apartment and off to Atlanta I went. Then a snag , I was like 4 pounds under weight what the fuck ? So I was put up in a hotel room across the street from the famous Fox Theater. 3 days I was fed peanut butter and banana sandwiches. On the 18th I was put on a train headed to Ft Dix New Jersey. I was in for a rude awakening , it was the first time in my life I had truly been scared.

One thing I had learned by then , life was based on two things. That would be choices and consequences.

A whole new life had opened up , once I finished Basic training I was off to Aberdeen Proving grounds. This is where I took a turn for the worse, smoking pot , taking pills and my first experience with Acid. Going to Titty bars at 17 being able to drink , I thought I was all grown up but it would take me several years to regain control.

Two tours in Korea this was my first experience with the world of BDSM I have posted a story about that. Then from Korea I was off to Germany where I met Gretchen , Gretchen was a beverly but only hotter. She had this goth nasty look. visiting a bar that looked like a cave, a singer named Nina was playing that night. Standing at the bar I turned and looked and I thought holy sweet jesus there is a god.  I walked up to her and she just looked at me and for the first time in my life I was speechless. I turned and walked away had a few more beers and walked back over and I just said you are fucking hot here’s a beer and she took it.

Gretchen was only 4’10 and weighed about 85 pounds , and always dressed goth, knee high platform boots with ripped stockings and gloves with no fingers. Jet black hair , and wore dark makeup.

Her and I would go over to a friend of mines place we would all be drinking , Gretchen laying across my lap and I would be fingering her ass , or have her suck my cock while we played cards. Going out when needing a taxi she would call at a phone booth and while waiting she would drop to her knees and blow me, she would even blow me sometimes in the taxi or at a bar.

Jumping ahead a few years I left the Army after serving 8 years. This is when I got slapped in the face. Still drinking , smoking pot and popping pills. Losing my first three jobs. Sitting down one night I thought to myself this is the same road my parents had taking.  So I fixed it I went cold turkey , took a month off to gather my thoughts.

Here I am today life is good and Ive calmed down quite a bit. Ive learned to control my anger. I now think logical , deep and hard before making huge decisions. Ive learned to love and not lust , although the lust does come out in thoughts.

I am now Married to my wife and slave Arianna , and our sister L life could not be any better. Last year my health started catching up to me and I had to make some drastic changes but there has been a huge improvement and it gets better every day.

Just a little more about me , much love to everyone who comes by and more so to those who comment. It may take a few days but I will reply.

 

 

The Power Of Slave Training

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7, BDSM Relationships, Dominant and Submissive, Face Fucking, fetlife, Master And Slave, molding your slave, owned property, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Total Power Exchange, Total Submission, TPE, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , , , , , on June 26, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Training has to be a need , not a want, if it is just a want it has no meaning. One day a week or so ago Arianna made the comment about the Topic Brainwashing , other topics have been Hypnosis. Both topics were really no surprise as she spends a good deal of time looking for other ways to offer her submission even more than she does now, she continues looking for ways to give up more control.

A TPE relationship or Total Power Exchange is not a easy task and even more so if it is a micromanaged but as time goes on it becomes less of a task and more of a way of life. Generally it takes both about 90 days to get their feet in the ground and well adjusted.

So lets set sex to the side for now and concentrate on the building of a lasting relationship. In the past sex was hard to put on the back burner. Putting sex on the back burner is very important and it is a need in order to build a successful D’s Or M’s relationship.

Training is a need and not a want , I mean the type of need that keeps you awake at night, the need to please someone , the need to give up control. If your needs are met then there are no wants..

Your body and mind belongs to someone else, you are told how to do your hair, the color, nails and how do dress. Sex will be new as well , your told how to suck dick , how to fuck, you become a toy.

Arianna and I spoke at our local munch this past week on the building a TPE , Total power exchange relationship. We love sharing our story on how we met , how we started and how we grew and today we continue to grow.

Sitting back and watching the transformation , the changes not so much at first but then you can see almost on a daily basis. The Slave however in most cases are not fully aware of any changes at all.

Starting out taking small privileges away , things that are cherished such as being able to sit on furniture, being able to sit at the dinner table and sitting on the floor next to you. Giving direct times to shower , using the bathroom asking permission to do anything. The forming of habits it very important , again being consistent on a daily basis , even hourly.

I prefer keeping my property nude while at home , no clothes unless I give the word. This bring on a more humble feeling , the feeling of being exposed. At times depending on the company who comes over determines if I allow clothes or not. Putting restrictions in place on when and where the Slave can sit and permission must be giving before any type of action.

Everything is earned nothing is giving , there are goals put in place and goals must be reached before moving on to the next level of training. Reaching goals there are small rewards, small privileges are giving. What ever is giving depends on your dynamic , your agreement in your relationship after all each is different.

If you the Dominant are going to put rules in place , protocols you have the responsibility to explain everything in full detail so the Slave understands what you are saying. The Slave should be able to ask for clarification if there are still unanswered questions.

Training a Slave or Submissive cannot begin until you know either inside out, you cannot impose any rules without fully knowing the needs.

The Slave is not your mother , the Slave is not your grandmother , if you want a mommy figure then move back home. I pickup behind myself , there are some days I cook and I will explain why.

We expect so much from our property , and you can get to a point to where there is a breaking point , so we as Dominants have to take up some of the load. Every Slave needs down time, a time to relax , clear their head. Get out for the day , see friends or family , go to a movie doing something giving the mind a chance to relax. This also allows down time for the Dominant, because not only do we work but we take care of the home as well. I myself need that time alone just as a Slave does, I need that time to clear my head.

Accountability is huge , there is a lot of meaning behind that word. The Slave has to know they are held accountable for their actions. The Slave has to know there are consequences. The Slave has to know the privileges giving can be taken away at any time. If you are going to punish then punish , you cant bark like a wolf and never attack. Say what you mean and do what you mean and if your going to punish explain in detail why and what punishment you are going to use. However you cannot sit around and watch hoping something is going to go wrong you are setting the Slave up for failure.

Rules are meant for improvement , rules are meant to be followed however I prefer protocols over rules. If enough realistic protocols are in place then very few rules are needed.

Using the Slave , and this has worked for me over the years but more so while in my relationship with Arianna. In the beginning stages of our relationship I made it clear sex was all about me. If she was allowed to cum it was earned and no I was not using Orgasm control, again its about me. The slave gives her self , and giving I mean fully.

You the Dominant when entering a relationship make your needs known upfront, lay everything out on the table, be clear and make sure the Slave understanding. If the Slave states one of your needs is off limits then sit down and talk. At this point you cannot be making any type of demands. If the two of you cannot come to an agreement then you move on. Just as the Slave is looking for the right owner , the Owner is looking for the right Slave.

Watching fifty shades of grey almost made me sick, although the movie is credited to bringing more men and women alive and opening their eyes , and I am sure it has helped some relationships in the bedroom.

The first movie while negotiating their contract Mr Grey gave in to almost all of his needs, the word is need. The second movie when begging for her to come back he got down on his knee almost begging. This showed how weak he was , I was really disappointed.

While the movie was based on being submissive during sex , there was absolutely nothing in the movie about a Dominant or Submissive on how they live on a daily bases, there was no structure , thus having no meaning. The Movie had nothing to do with Master and Slave. To some men the movie was a open door to abuse, some men think all women think that way and that is just not true.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/02/23/college-student-accused-of-rape-claims-he-was-reenacting-50-shades-of-grey/?utm_term=.93211a13bf53

It is really fucked up how some people think, its fucked up how those who call themselves Dominants and see submission as a form of weakness.

Back to using , once you have agreed to enter a relationship and the terms are made clear you are ready to begin. I find the words making love very hard to use, It is seldom I can even get off in that frame of mind. I have the mindset I am using my property , I am using my property for my pleasure, I am using my property so I can get off. At times I am extremely rough and at times not so much. I love getting my cock sucked , there is not a better feeling and while I try to be somewhat gentle yea it does not end up as such.  I use the term face fucking, I love that gagging feeling , feeling the muscles grabbing my cock. I love anal sex at times I use lube then there are times I go straight from the mouth to the ass or from the pussy to the as. I love ass to mouth, which makes me wonder if banks know what ATM really means. The word again is use , you use your property.

This is something I shared on Fetlife.

I am not into the pain , I am not into humiliation although at times I do believe it is necessary .
I am not into abuse of any kind , be it physical , mental , or verbal.

My slave and I just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary and I cannot begin to explain how blessed I am .

On our wedding day we also had a collaring ceremony and to this day my slaves collar has never been off.

I am into a well structured home , I am into a drama free home, I am into a problem free home.

I run a very strict home , rules are followed , I have strict protocols in place both are followed without question.

I am into communication I set time aside on a daily basis.
There are no cell phones allowed during any meal public or private.

My slave comes first without question.

To this day we have yet to have a single argument, this is something I take pride in.

I just wanted to say thank you Arianna

I crave the control , I crave the structure , I crave the drama free life , I crave the problem free life, I am living the dream.

I dont want passwords  to accounts that is just fucking childish , if I cant trust you I dont need you. I am far from insecure, however I will take the phone or pad and go through when I feel like it. I think in 4.5 years ive going through Ariannas phone and pad maybe 5 times , Lynn now our third once.  There is a huge difference in being in control and being controlling.

Find your space , find your needs , and find someone who shares the same interest you have..

As A Slave Or Submissive

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Anger Issues, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Bondage, communication, Dominant and Submissive, Domme, fuck hole, Giving Head, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Low Self Esteem, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Meeting a new Dominant, Slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock with tags , , , on May 14, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Where do you want to be ? What do you truly want ? How do you see yourself in a mirror? What are your goals ? What so you want to accomplish in life ? What are your dreams? Dreams are real , dreams are reachable , dreams can come true. How much work are you willing to put in to make those dreams come true. If you think about it nothing is free , if you sit and wait for something you fall out of the sky you will end up being alone.

Why do you not share the above with a potential Dominant or Master , maybe a Domme? Why would you put your life on hold for one man or woman ? A good Dominant will stand by you , a good Dominant will push you to accomplish everything on your list , he will push you and push you hard because he as well knows nothing is free. Those who keep you locked up away from family and friends is selfish. The Dominant who keeps you isolated lives in fear of you leaving , he does not trust , he does not want anyone else influencing you. He wants to be the word the only word you listen to. The Dominant has a low self esteem, and all of this equals abuse and nothing more. The abuse may not be physical , but it is mental and physiological. This does not include just the lifestyle this happens in a everyday vanilla relationship. Calling you names , screaming at you , spitting on you. You feel as if you can do nothing right and this is where he wants your mind to be.

The I can fix you Dominant , what he is saying is all of the above , because the truth of the matter is very few want to take on such a responsibility .

Sex is no longer fun because you are seen as a object you feel like a object and while your being fucked you just want it over so you can go shower and wash his stench away. You cook , you clean , you do laundry , you pick up behind him , in fact you do everything his mother did , with the exception of fucking.

You spend more time sucking cock than you ever have , your mouth is just another hole. He blows his load and gets up and leaves. You spend more time laying on your back taking what he gives and you get nothing out of it. You are punished for no reason , the rules change on a daily basis without notice. You take pain because you think your suppose to, as you lay in bed and glaze at the bruises , wondering how in the fuck did you get here?

A true statement there are many who continue to make the same mistakes expecting different results. There are those who are only interested in the bad boy look but you are treated the same way time after time, until it becomes the norm.

Older single Dominants tend to flow towards the young subs and slaves. This is purely fantasy and nothing more. What does a 50 year old Dom have in common with a 18 year old sub? He is more interested in getting his dick sucked and fucking than he is looking out for your future. Why is this you ask ? Well just read the above or maybe just maybe you already know its true because as I am typing this you are living this very life.

You think you are just a fuck toy , you believe you are meant to be used anyway he sees fit. You believe you have no rights when in fact as a submissive you have the right to say NO , but you live in fear , in fear of being alone , in fear of not being able to take responsibility of your own life, being able to live on your own. If you stay it will only take a few years to realize how many dreams have slipped though you hands and you believe everything is your fault because you are told this daily just how worthless you are.

Family and friends are a important part of your life these are people you have more than likely known your whole life but now you find yourself alone standing before one and one only.

Before meeting your new Dominant you have so much information to share but this is put on hold before even meeting. He is more interested in the shortest skirt you own, do you wear high heels, how often do you go without panties? You are told what to wear , you are told there will be no eye contact, you are told he will order for you, and for the encore you will suck his cock in the parking lot and you both leave. You spent maybe a hour and a half eating and listening you only got a few words in. You leave after taking a mouth load and he knows absolutely nothing about you with the exception you suck a good dick.

You have put your life on hold , you have put your education on hold your dreams on hold and if you think your going to end up with the little white house with a fence around it with a dog and kids you need to slap your face. You have put your whole life on hold because you were afraid to express your feelings , you were and are intimidated.

If you are active in the lifestyle you will notice there are way more single Doms than there are subs and slaves. These Doms have been single for a very long time and you ask why? Because they fall under the above they have watched 50 shades , read stories , watch porn , read stories and that is how they see the lifestyle.

At some point you have to be friends , at some point a little of that vanilla has to come out but maintaining the same level of respect. You have to be able to sit and talk , you have to be able to communicate.

The sex is fun , the bondage is fun , the spanking is fun , the slapping , being pissed on , humiliated all of this can be fun but in the end you have to be best friends. You have to be able to talk as adults , you have to be able to express your feelings , your thoughts and concerns.

I love dinner time , the three of us sitting on the back porch eating , no cell phones, this is our time to talk. Both ask permission to sit, both wait on me to take the first bite before they begin to eat. Then comes my question directed at Lynn. Is there anything on your mind that you would like to talk about? Those words open a very deep conversation between the three of us. This is the time to air everything , thoughts and concerns, we also talk about schedules and things the girls would like to do and on what days. Both have a calendar , everything is planned out a month in advance. Both sit down together filling it out , buying little stickies and stuff to decorate.

I am in full control of my home , I know every move each make , both have mileage note books everything is logged leaving and destination and at times ill ask one to bring it in and leave it for a day, and when I get time I will look through it. I allow no drama into the home, I handle problems before they become a problem.

There is one difference , I give each free time , time to wind down be with friends and family but they both understand what is giving is a privilege and it can be taken away at any time…  Everything is a privilege , everything is earned nothing and I mean absolutely  nothing is given.

I support both in anything they want to do, I listen , we talk and when we talk it is a open discussion, but I can only make a informed decision based on the information given to me.

You must always come first no matter what. Your dreams , your feelings , your thoughts , your life must always come first without question….

You can paint your own future.

Also visit

https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/

 

A Slave Needs Down Time

Posted in abuse, Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, communication, Dominant and Submissive, fucking and sucking, http://bestslavetraining.com/, Insecure Dominants, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Self Pity, Slave, Submission, Submissive, submissive or slave has rights, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , on April 18, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

While at a munch 3 or 4 months ago there was a topic on relationships , the different types of Doms and submissive’s. Asking Arianna what type of Master I was she said I was like the Rock star , meaning the way I am treated.

Speaking with someone else the topic come up about men helping around the house and I said I do stuff. I was then asked what I did and my mind went blank.

Think Vile , my mind was going crazy and I came back I just do stuff ok drop it. Driving home with Arianna and Lynn , just out of the blue I said I do stuff ,Arianna replied yes you do Master.

On my days off I love cooking , when I cook it is something special , I generally spend the day preparing and cooking. So yes I do stuff leave me alone.

Then we turn the page and we look into our submissive’s life our slave , our property. If you the Dominant would just take a moment and sit down and reflect on just how much your submissive does and gives it might just give you a different perspective.

We want everything just right, we want everything in place, we want our glass full at all times. Then comes the kink , the bondage , fucking , getting head. We use when we want , how we want , where we want.  With me my sex life is like HBO on demand , I take when I want anyway I want, at anytime I want and any hole. We as Masters want to be able to snap our fingers and BOOM its done. We want rules followed , protocols , and we punish when something goes wrong.

Arianna and Lynn has a calendar and it is filled out daily I keep track of everything. There are also request days , usually a month out. These are days I give for both to be able to go out and let go , relax , clear their heads.

One of the most important is family , I am Master but family comes first no questions asked. Friends come into play everybody needs friends and our property deserves that time.

There is a breaking point , kinda like running a race horse till it drops, not giving it any down time , running it into the ground until it just drops. You stand above wondering what happened.

I need down time , I need to be able to clear my head , I need to relax , sit down and blog while jamming out to AC/DC Live at the river plate. Pouring myself a nice brandy firing up a good cigar on the back porch..

I am not meaning to get under anyone’s collar but to keep your property locked up 24/7 is not fair and if you do there will come a time when you wake up alone. It is not fair to keep your property from their family and friends.

There are only a few types of Dominants who would not allow downtime , free time, time to see family or friends. You are talking one day a month really and you are that concerned ?

The Master is insecure , the Master is controlling , the Master does not trust. The Master has a ego problem. I am going to guess it is the first being insecure.  Being insecure can cause a lot of problems down the road again your property is going to take only so much.

We want our dick sucked on demand , we tell to spread not ask , bend over I want the ass. We use different object , toys really anything we want. So why is it not fair to give that down time?

I control everything , hair color , hair length , nail polish , fuck even makeup. I control what both wear , I control shoes , everything is on my dime, everything is on Viles watch , Viles time.

I am secure , I trust , if I cant trust I don’t need you. If you fuck around you need to make sure he is the one you want because that is who you will be living with.

If you cannot trust why in the fuck would you of even entered a relationship? It makes no fucking sense to be spending so much time wondering who your property is fucking or blowing. If the cheat you know , you have to know if you know your slave .

If you are taking care of business you have no worries. If you are insecure , if you do not trust , if you keep locked up 24/7 then you have something to worry about. It is not a question of how or why it is a question of when. There will come a time when your slave says fuck this shit I am done.

You the Master wants 100% at all times no questions asked , the bad news is we as Masters have to give back 200%, yup we have to give back more than we take.

Keep pushing that button and one day the spring will break and you will have to replace it…  Keeping someone locked up 24/7 is abuse, you might as well beat their ass. If you are insecure works on your issues figure out what is wrong… Do not make your property suffer because you have short Cummings….

 

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, blow job, cock sucking, codependency, codependent, commitment, communication, consequences, Dominant and Submissive, Ego, Face Fucking, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, Kink, Low Self Esteem, masochist, Master And Slave, Online Dominants, owned property, Owned Slave, Poly Triad, Private Protocol, Punishment, self confidence, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission with tags , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sitting here listening to Bret Michael’s jamming with friends , and it fucking rocks. Music is a passion of mine , it is my release , it is my time to chill , gather my thoughts , enjoy my own little world.  Ted Nugent , KISS , Aerosmith , and some country at the top of my list Kid Rock. I love the cheesy kung fu movies that comes on Thursday nights. I am a huge news fanatic so if there is something you want to know just ask.

I am very laid back for the most , I have never raised my voice or lost my temper towards my property. This is not to say I am a push over because I am not , I speak my mind no matter where I am or who I am with.

I am a Buddhist , I have learned to channel my anger but as with any man or human there is a limit. At one time I had a very bad temper , I drank a lot , you could hand me a bunch of pills  and I would not even ask what they were I would just take them. I tried to smoke all the pot in the world but I failed. I would smoke and someone would just grow more. I was on a down hill spiral with not a care about tomorrow or the future.

A Dom who has a temper is not a Dom he is a abuser and nothing more. A man who hits a woman out of anger is a pussy because he will not hit anyone who will not fight back. A Dom who will not allow you to ask questions and want answers is not a Dom. A Dom who does not allow open communication is not a Dom…

However that road of destruction ended around November 1986. October and November I lost my first two jobs after my exit from the US Army. I went cold turkey I stopped everything at one time not looking back… I thought for sure I would of had some type of withdraws but that was not the case, however I did lose most of my friends or I assumed they were friends…

At this time I was living in a small town called canton Ga. It had changed a lot being gone for ten years. Most of the people I knew had moved or changed so much we no longer had anything in common…

My Dominance is a gift and I mean that. A gift means I am taking time out of my life and offering a gift. My gift I am setting my time and life to the side and offering you security , I am offering a sanctuary of peace no drama , no arguing . I am offering you respect , I am offering you me. I am offering you a open door 24/7 , I am offering you communication 24/7. I am offering you stability , I am offering you protection. I will allow you to grow and I will conform to your needs. I will take the time out of my life to train you to fit my needs. I will not take advantage of you , I will not mislead you , I will admit my mistakes. I will offer more than I take but most of all I will always put you first.

Wow! looking over the list and it could of continued I am sure with enough thought. I just wanted to crack the door open and let people take a peak inside.

Both dominance and submission is a gift both have much to offer and prove. I am of course speaking of the beginning steps in a new relationship.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.

I am at a later date going to speak about our triad , we now live as three and while there could be some improvement things are really going well. My time training is limited due to my work but Arianna has stepped up to the plate and is offering guidance .

The Slave has a different mindset than a submissive. A submissive can and has the right to say NO. The submissive can impose limits on the relationship. The submissive can have the choice of when and when not to submit.

The word Slave , the word ownership , the word property. We all know owning a slave is not in any way legal but it is a mindset. The slave kneels holds her hands out and says I am yours to take and use.

You have to want it , you have to need and crave, it has to be in your blood. You have to live, dream and walk with this deep need and desire.

Arianna is a very unique Slave , during her training there was no rejection , there was no resistance, I could see in her eyes she had a hunger. To this day she continues to seek ways to submit more to give more. Everyday I grow with her everyday my respect grows. As my needs change Arianna conforms , but as she changes I conform to meet her needs.

Giving yourself without a thought having that feeling of being completely owned. Willing to be trained to fit someones needs and wants. Being used as a sexual object at the drop of a hat. You can be loved but in the end you are owned property.

Now I sit looking back over the years and thinking about the transformation , thinking about the growth. Watching someones habits change, watching needs change. More than willing to follow rules , protocols and understand there are consequences for her actions. To this day Arianna continues to search and find ways to submit more , she has that need, it is something she craves.

You the Slave must be in the right frame of mind and have a understanding what is about to take place. You must be willing to have over your mind and body and be willing to hand over complete control without question.

Are you Domestic more service orientated ? Are you just going to be used sexually ? Are you a Masochist used for pain? Or are you a mixture of all rolled into one?

You also must be giving a clear understanding what is expected of you , what your training will consist of , how long your training will be. You will want to know what the final goal is.

Trust is the main factor in building a Master / Slave relationship. The slave knowing once she or he agrees to the terms negotiated during the process.

You have to know most of your rights will be stripped away from you. You must know you and your body will be used , without warning. You will be taken when and how your Master chooses.

However and there is a however , you should still be allowed to see friends and family , a slave needs what I call down time. A time to relax and breath , to be able to clear the mind. A time to reflect on past and future.

We as Masters and Dominants take and we must give back more than we take. Probably two or three times a week I tell both Arianna and L that I really appreciate everything they both do. At time I do help out as well. On my days off I cook and at times I even jump in and do a few dishes.

A Slave is not your maid although the slave will be giving chores to do , A slave is not your mom. I pickup behind myself. If I use something I put it back. I do not demand dinner be done at a certain time, both know when I take lunch , If I am going to be late they eat before me.

Many just sit back and look for reasons to punish and my question is why? We can just sit back and find something wrong and the first thing that most grab is a belt or paddle.

Although I run a strict house punishing is something I do not look forward to, just as a parent feels bad for punishing a child.

We as humans , Masters and Dominants make mistakes maybe not on a daily basis but we do. Slaves and submissive’s make mistakes as well but nothing more could be more devastating known they have failed.

As with the 7 types of Submissives there are just as many slaves , but also there are just as many Dominants or Masters..

The service slave is more geared towards service , cleaning , cooking , and keeping things in order. Although sex does play a part service is their main goal. Just knowing their Master is pleased gives them pleasure.

The sex slave can be a little service orientated but is geared more at being used as a sex object , at times no holes barred. The sex slave gets off more knowing they have pleased than them getting off. Most sex slaves will conform to what pleases the Master and urge those actions more.

The Masochist in most cases is neither just as a full blown sadist. Very little structure , very few rules, it is all about the pain and the pleasure the sadist gets out of inflicting pain.

The all around slave a mixture of all of the above , a slave that needs a little of all , being used , in service and at times stepping up to take what pain is giving..

We as Master need to step up to the plate , owning one of the above takes a great deal of time and responsibility. We must make ourselves available 24/7. Arianna knows she can wake me at any time to talk.. We must give more than we take.

Being codependent does not make you broken , being needy does not make you broken , having a low self esteem does not make you broken in fact many times it makes you special.

I have heard many times I am broken or I am not worthy of having a Dominant or Master.

I myself prefer the needy part even the codependent , it is just knowing how to handle and being able to offer the care. Short term neither play out good if both sides are not ready to commit.

I have found very few Dominants or those who call themselves Masters who are truly willing to take any type of relationship serious or willing to take the responsibility needed.  These are the guys who hide behind the computer , the trolls who really have no clue. Once they find someone who is gullible enough it is short lived . The crazy rules the unrealistic demands , the confusion of changing rules just so they can punish.

Training is very time consuming just the initial training I am going to say 90 days with hands on contact on a daily basis. In order to be in control you have to be able to reach out and touch. Online training does not work , it works as long as the computer is on and you have 24/7 contact then it is still iffy.

You have to have need , the craving to be owned , the craving to be used , the craving to be called property. The craving to be able to hand yourself over completely.

The hardest part is the first 90 days it will tell you number one if you are just going through a frenzy or the life of a slave is not you….. It is easy to throw in the towel and give up , it takes a lot to stick it out , but if things are not what they seem , the raise the white flag and say I am done… No shame your just being true. I can assure you the Dominant you leave is not the last in the world.

I believe at times humiliation is needed , it is needed to bring someone back down to reality. It is meant to give a shock , kinda like sticker shock when looking at a new car. It brings someone ego back down to earth. Even during my relationship there are times I will use some form of humiliation to keep things in check , it puts them or reminds the slave of their place..

The word USE I use my property , I use my property for my pleasure , even during fucking I use the word USE , I love using you , I love fucking my property , I love fucking your ass. I like the little reminders..

We live a micromanaged relationship as most of you know. I control everything. I control hair color , I control the length , the nail polish , her clothes . I control the way she walks , talks. I control how she acts in public. I control bathroom , food , bedtime , shower , shaving. I receive a hourly check in 90% of the time with pictures. Both girls have a mileage book although I do not check it on a regular basis it is there if I have the urge to look. I have no passwords , I see no need mainly because I am secure enough in my relationship. However I will at times pick up the phones and strum through them.  If you as a Dominant has the need to demand passwords you do not trust and you have a very low self esteem.

If you the Dominant are insecure how can you control someone and your ego not be behind the force of your relationship? A relationship based on insecurities and ego will be short lived and you brought it on yourself, but you will sit in a corner and cry like a little bitch. Even in a relationship when things don’t go your way you still act like a little bitch.

You cannot be a part time Master , you have to be a Master 24/7 365

If you noticed I did not speak to much about Kink , or Bondage. My relationship runs much deeper. While at times I enjoy getting rough , at times I enjoy bondage , at times I get off on sexual abuse , face fucking being my favorite, then anal. I am more about the control , I love being in the mind. I love the structure . I have a life with zero problems and zero drama.. I love my life

New Dominants your best source for information http://bestslavetraining.com/

Oh My Ride

 

Grow up and be a man…

 

 

You Are A Submissive No You Are A Slave

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, are you submissive, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominant and Submissive, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master & Slave, relationships, Self-identification, Slave, Submission, Submissive with tags , , , , on March 11, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

The world is full of stupid people , we all know stupid cannot be fixed. The world is full of idiots , again cannot be fixed. We all know the world is full of Predators again cannot be fixed. The world is full of abusers and once a abuser always a abuser. The world is full of rapist , again cannot be fixed. The world is full of pedophiles yes very sick but cannot be fixed.

The above our medical professionals say all of these people can be fixed , well with the exception of stupid and idiots. We can give medication , we can send to rehab , and we can offer group meetings and regular appointments but the truth is those people are poison.

Then we move into the world of BDSM a world like our universe that has no end and we have the capability of stepping into other worlds, we have the capability of experimenting , we have the capability to explore new and decide where we fit in.

Wikipedia

BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves as practicing BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture is usually dependent on self-identification and shared experience.

Look at the word Self-identification because it will come up again soon in my post it is very important.

As much as I would like to believe I am not perfect, yea I know a big pill to swallow but it is true.  While I am close to perfection I do mess up every now and then but when I do it is usually something I have no control over. When it does happen I take a step back I rethink things and I move on with a different plan.

Where am I going with this ? I did not just wake up one morning and say hey I am a Dominant , or a Master titles are really useless if they are not acknowledge in a form or respect from someone other than you.

It took years for me to evolve , years to learn and learning from mistakes and yes I made the same mistake more than once before I learned it was not someone else it was me.

It took me years to be able to self identify so I could determine the direction I wanted to go , still stumbling and making mistakes.

I just like you had to go through a Self-identification process , while others were trying to tell me who and what I was. Self-identification is not a over night process and it a process that one has to put a great deal of thought and soul searching.

The thing that makes it a hard rode to follow are the fine people I mentioned above. The stupid , the idiots, the predators , the rapist,he abusers and in some cases the pedophiles. You have to think smart and keep your emotions packed away because the above mentioned will hurt you .

You meet a Dom on a dating site , maybe craigslist , maybe in a chatroom. You talk for a while then you agree to meet and twenty minutes into the conversation he is telling you who and what you are. You are not a submissive you are a slave really? This dude has been talking twenty minutes and he has you figured out , while he has no clue what your favorite color is , what your favorite movies are , the foods you like and he has already made a determination on who and what you are. He knows nothing about your family or upbringing , the kind of friends you have.

The things he does know is if you swallow , if you take it up the ass , if you are into humiliation oh and if you are Bi sexual if not willing to try.

Self-identification  The act of identifying yourself as a particular kind of person. Knowing and understand who and what you are. Being able to communicate with others about who and what you are and what you not only want out of life but what you expect.

Self-identification requires self thought and understanding on many different levels. A good example , your are a Slave , um no I am submissive. Now this is not to say as you grow while in a relationship you could have growth or something may inspire you to explore the option of entering such a world.

You cannot chat with someone or meet someone once or twice and the Dominant come to a conclusion of where you fit in the lifestyle. In order to make that kind of determination someone would have to know you inside out.

So questions that come to mind , why do you think I am a Slave ? How do you know I am a Slave? What are you going to get out of such a relationship ? What are your goals in a Master / Slave relationship ? Once confronted chances are there will be no answer , chances are anger will come out simply because you questioned his experience ..

I went through a rather long process of Self-identification , figuring out who and what I was about a year. First I had to understand me , then I had to understand what I wanted out of this one life I was giving. At this point and time in my life I had hit rock bottom, going through the guilt , the poor me self pity , the whole world was against me when in fact I was against myself. My problems were self inflicting , I myself created a mess I had to figure out how to clean up. I spent a year alone , dating from time to time just for the companionship someone to talk to. Many times we settle for less just for the companionship and security knowing it is not going to work , but it works for the moment and time..

Self-identification never let someone try and take this from you it changes your whole identity , it changes your whole world and you will not be happy.

I have never figured out why so many are stuck on titles , I am assuming that is why some try to put you in a category , you are slave and I am Master. The word Master puts him on a different ego cloud, his chest swells so much he can hardly breath and when you come back I am not a slave I am submissive the chest then begins to deflate. Anger comes out he then starts to get aggression , this is a side you have not seen and it should be a warning sign. I hate the word red flag , red flag has no meaning , anything can be labeled as a red flag. When you talk to others they will say oh he does not text back immediately  that is a red flag you should dump him.

Being able to see and understand if you are just being used , used as a toy , a fuck toy. You find yourself on your knees most of the time sucking dick or getting your ass beat for a couple of hours a month and never hearing from him. Doing things you never thought you would , sending pics and videos which you have and were totally against. What are the benefits of such actions unless it is just a control thing ?

I said once before every morning when you wake you stand in front of the mirror in the bathroom and take a deep look. Then you wash your face and make to bad go away and bring in the good.. I guess kinda like the wax on wax off.

If you are knew to the lifestyle you know absolutely nothing. You have spent hours reading and what you are reading is someones opinion and you don’t even know if it is true. You spend hours chatting in BDSM rooms most of the Dominants their are web Doms who are single and will remain single. There are Doms making unrealistic demands , demands you call them Sir or Master. He gets your phone number you both masturbate then he has to go. The whole conversation zeros in around sex and nothing more he has not intentions of moving nor do you because you want to find someone next door.

If you want something you have to be willing to put effort into getting what you want. You have to be willing to work for what you want. If something is just given there is no respect for it.

After the Self-identification process and you meet your prospective owner your job has not ended because now you have to negotiate your relationship at this time you are able to make demands , you have to explain who you are and what you need out of a relationship. It is very important you stick to your needs and not give in. He will then make his demands and you need to listen and ask questions.

The insecure Dom , this are the ones who show anger , do not trust, want all of your passwords. You are accused of cheating , you cannot do anything right. You are not a true submissive. Most of the time it is just verbal , humiliation , mental but at times it can get physical. All of this is abuse but once it gets physical it will never stop. The insecure Dom will not communicate , he will not talk or listen. At this time you sit him down and say look things are going to change or I will make changes for you.  Stand your ground.

If you want some good information bestslavetraining.com

Self-identification never let someone tell you who or what you are.