Archive for the BDSM Online Relationships Category

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, blow job, cock sucking, codependency, codependent, commitment, communication, consequences, Dominant and Submissive, Ego, Face Fucking, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, Kink, Low Self Esteem, masochist, Master And Slave, Online Dominants, owned property, Owned Slave, Poly Triad, Private Protocol, Punishment, self confidence, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission with tags , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sitting here listening to Bret Michael’s jamming with friends , and it fucking rocks. Music is a passion of mine , it is my release , it is my time to chill , gather my thoughts , enjoy my own little world.  Ted Nugent , KISS , Aerosmith , and some country at the top of my list Kid Rock. I love the cheesy kung fu movies that comes on Thursday nights. I am a huge news fanatic so if there is something you want to know just ask.

I am very laid back for the most , I have never raised my voice or lost my temper towards my property. This is not to say I am a push over because I am not , I speak my mind no matter where I am or who I am with.

I am a Buddhist , I have learned to channel my anger but as with any man or human there is a limit. At one time I had a very bad temper , I drank a lot , you could hand me a bunch of pills  and I would not even ask what they were I would just take them. I tried to smoke all the pot in the world but I failed. I would smoke and someone would just grow more. I was on a down hill spiral with not a care about tomorrow or the future.

A Dom who has a temper is not a Dom he is a abuser and nothing more. A man who hits a woman out of anger is a pussy because he will not hit anyone who will not fight back. A Dom who will not allow you to ask questions and want answers is not a Dom. A Dom who does not allow open communication is not a Dom…

However that road of destruction ended around November 1986. October and November I lost my first two jobs after my exit from the US Army. I went cold turkey I stopped everything at one time not looking back… I thought for sure I would of had some type of withdraws but that was not the case, however I did lose most of my friends or I assumed they were friends…

At this time I was living in a small town called canton Ga. It had changed a lot being gone for ten years. Most of the people I knew had moved or changed so much we no longer had anything in common…

My Dominance is a gift and I mean that. A gift means I am taking time out of my life and offering a gift. My gift I am setting my time and life to the side and offering you security , I am offering a sanctuary of peace no drama , no arguing . I am offering you respect , I am offering you me. I am offering you a open door 24/7 , I am offering you communication 24/7. I am offering you stability , I am offering you protection. I will allow you to grow and I will conform to your needs. I will take the time out of my life to train you to fit my needs. I will not take advantage of you , I will not mislead you , I will admit my mistakes. I will offer more than I take but most of all I will always put you first.

Wow! looking over the list and it could of continued I am sure with enough thought. I just wanted to crack the door open and let people take a peak inside.

Both dominance and submission is a gift both have much to offer and prove. I am of course speaking of the beginning steps in a new relationship.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.

I am at a later date going to speak about our triad , we now live as three and while there could be some improvement things are really going well. My time training is limited due to my work but Arianna has stepped up to the plate and is offering guidance .

The Slave has a different mindset than a submissive. A submissive can and has the right to say NO. The submissive can impose limits on the relationship. The submissive can have the choice of when and when not to submit.

The word Slave , the word ownership , the word property. We all know owning a slave is not in any way legal but it is a mindset. The slave kneels holds her hands out and says I am yours to take and use.

You have to want it , you have to need and crave, it has to be in your blood. You have to live, dream and walk with this deep need and desire.

Arianna is a very unique Slave , during her training there was no rejection , there was no resistance, I could see in her eyes she had a hunger. To this day she continues to seek ways to submit more to give more. Everyday I grow with her everyday my respect grows. As my needs change Arianna conforms , but as she changes I conform to meet her needs.

Giving yourself without a thought having that feeling of being completely owned. Willing to be trained to fit someones needs and wants. Being used as a sexual object at the drop of a hat. You can be loved but in the end you are owned property.

Now I sit looking back over the years and thinking about the transformation , thinking about the growth. Watching someones habits change, watching needs change. More than willing to follow rules , protocols and understand there are consequences for her actions. To this day Arianna continues to search and find ways to submit more , she has that need, it is something she craves.

You the Slave must be in the right frame of mind and have a understanding what is about to take place. You must be willing to have over your mind and body and be willing to hand over complete control without question.

Are you Domestic more service orientated ? Are you just going to be used sexually ? Are you a Masochist used for pain? Or are you a mixture of all rolled into one?

You also must be giving a clear understanding what is expected of you , what your training will consist of , how long your training will be. You will want to know what the final goal is.

Trust is the main factor in building a Master / Slave relationship. The slave knowing once she or he agrees to the terms negotiated during the process.

You have to know most of your rights will be stripped away from you. You must know you and your body will be used , without warning. You will be taken when and how your Master chooses.

However and there is a however , you should still be allowed to see friends and family , a slave needs what I call down time. A time to relax and breath , to be able to clear the mind. A time to reflect on past and future.

We as Masters and Dominants take and we must give back more than we take. Probably two or three times a week I tell both Arianna and L that I really appreciate everything they both do. At time I do help out as well. On my days off I cook and at times I even jump in and do a few dishes.

A Slave is not your maid although the slave will be giving chores to do , A slave is not your mom. I pickup behind myself. If I use something I put it back. I do not demand dinner be done at a certain time, both know when I take lunch , If I am going to be late they eat before me.

Many just sit back and look for reasons to punish and my question is why? We can just sit back and find something wrong and the first thing that most grab is a belt or paddle.

Although I run a strict house punishing is something I do not look forward to, just as a parent feels bad for punishing a child.

We as humans , Masters and Dominants make mistakes maybe not on a daily basis but we do. Slaves and submissive’s make mistakes as well but nothing more could be more devastating known they have failed.

As with the 7 types of Submissives there are just as many slaves , but also there are just as many Dominants or Masters..

The service slave is more geared towards service , cleaning , cooking , and keeping things in order. Although sex does play a part service is their main goal. Just knowing their Master is pleased gives them pleasure.

The sex slave can be a little service orientated but is geared more at being used as a sex object , at times no holes barred. The sex slave gets off more knowing they have pleased than them getting off. Most sex slaves will conform to what pleases the Master and urge those actions more.

The Masochist in most cases is neither just as a full blown sadist. Very little structure , very few rules, it is all about the pain and the pleasure the sadist gets out of inflicting pain.

The all around slave a mixture of all of the above , a slave that needs a little of all , being used , in service and at times stepping up to take what pain is giving..

We as Master need to step up to the plate , owning one of the above takes a great deal of time and responsibility. We must make ourselves available 24/7. Arianna knows she can wake me at any time to talk.. We must give more than we take.

Being codependent does not make you broken , being needy does not make you broken , having a low self esteem does not make you broken in fact many times it makes you special.

I have heard many times I am broken or I am not worthy of having a Dominant or Master.

I myself prefer the needy part even the codependent , it is just knowing how to handle and being able to offer the care. Short term neither play out good if both sides are not ready to commit.

I have found very few Dominants or those who call themselves Masters who are truly willing to take any type of relationship serious or willing to take the responsibility needed.  These are the guys who hide behind the computer , the trolls who really have no clue. Once they find someone who is gullible enough it is short lived . The crazy rules the unrealistic demands , the confusion of changing rules just so they can punish.

Training is very time consuming just the initial training I am going to say 90 days with hands on contact on a daily basis. In order to be in control you have to be able to reach out and touch. Online training does not work , it works as long as the computer is on and you have 24/7 contact then it is still iffy.

You have to have need , the craving to be owned , the craving to be used , the craving to be called property. The craving to be able to hand yourself over completely.

The hardest part is the first 90 days it will tell you number one if you are just going through a frenzy or the life of a slave is not you….. It is easy to throw in the towel and give up , it takes a lot to stick it out , but if things are not what they seem , the raise the white flag and say I am done… No shame your just being true. I can assure you the Dominant you leave is not the last in the world.

I believe at times humiliation is needed , it is needed to bring someone back down to reality. It is meant to give a shock , kinda like sticker shock when looking at a new car. It brings someone ego back down to earth. Even during my relationship there are times I will use some form of humiliation to keep things in check , it puts them or reminds the slave of their place..

The word USE I use my property , I use my property for my pleasure , even during fucking I use the word USE , I love using you , I love fucking my property , I love fucking your ass. I like the little reminders..

We live a micromanaged relationship as most of you know. I control everything. I control hair color , I control the length , the nail polish , her clothes . I control the way she walks , talks. I control how she acts in public. I control bathroom , food , bedtime , shower , shaving. I receive a hourly check in 90% of the time with pictures. Both girls have a mileage book although I do not check it on a regular basis it is there if I have the urge to look. I have no passwords , I see no need mainly because I am secure enough in my relationship. However I will at times pick up the phones and strum through them.  If you as a Dominant has the need to demand passwords you do not trust and you have a very low self esteem.

If you the Dominant are insecure how can you control someone and your ego not be behind the force of your relationship? A relationship based on insecurities and ego will be short lived and you brought it on yourself, but you will sit in a corner and cry like a little bitch. Even in a relationship when things don’t go your way you still act like a little bitch.

You cannot be a part time Master , you have to be a Master 24/7 365

If you noticed I did not speak to much about Kink , or Bondage. My relationship runs much deeper. While at times I enjoy getting rough , at times I enjoy bondage , at times I get off on sexual abuse , face fucking being my favorite, then anal. I am more about the control , I love being in the mind. I love the structure . I have a life with zero problems and zero drama.. I love my life

New Dominants your best source for information http://bestslavetraining.com/

Oh My Ride

 

Grow up and be a man…

 

 

Some Have A Very Dark Side , Michael Makai

Posted in Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Online Relationships, Charles Michael Segaloff, consequences, Convicted Sex Offender, Fake Dominants, http://housemakai.wordpress.com/, human trafficking, Living Poly, Manipulation, Michael Makai, morals, Poly couple, poly slaves, Polyamory, Polygamist, polygamy, Self Proclaimed Master, Slave, Submissive, Total Servitude / Solitude on December 26, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I am going to say it was roughly two years ago I received a phone call , at that time I was very interested in starting a internet radio show , and today I am still pondering the idea. It is a long time commitment if I were to venture into such a thing.

The call came in and the number was blocked , I found that to be somewhat odd but I took it anyway , note this was already prearranged. I had a million questions and then a few more, as I was talking the answers I was getting , were in a belittling format , but I just looked over it because it was apparent the person I was speaking with on the phone was not who he portrayed himself to be…. It was not long after I unfriended  him from social media.

So a somewhat successful book it would seem he was at the top of the world , but I am sure the closet was getting so full the door would not shut, so he manipulated others to stand and hold it closed , if that makes any sense.

Thinking back about all the people I have met in the lifestyle ive noticed one thing , and that would be manipulation. Manipulation runs wild like a cancer, preying on those who have no clue about the lifestyle or maybe even infatuation plays a part , but there is a trigger..

No matter who you are, or think you are, or the game you are playing you always get caught. The world crashes down around you , the walls cave in around you and there is no place to run , or even any friends to turn to , because everyone runs and hides.

It is funny you think you have a million friends but then you find out your really alone, I cannot even imagine how that would feel, on any level.

So who am I speaking of ? I was not going to bring up any names but I have changed my mind.

If a 17 year old contacts a grown man , the only words that should be spoken is I cannot help you. Mike was contacted via face book this is where the relationship began.

I am speaking of no other than Charles Michael Segaloff , or as many know him as Michael Makai

I want to go over a few things first before I begin my rant. A Dominant is a leader in the community , reaching out to those in need , and not expecting anything in return. As we grow older we want to share what we have learned over the years, while my way or our way may not be yours maybe there would be something you could put to good use. While I cannot fix you or your relationship , maybe some of my advice just might come in handy.

When someone wants to profit from your needs or questions , this is not the trait of a real Dominant. I am proud to say I did not purchase any of his books, I did listen to about 10 minutes of his boring radio show.

You always get caught no matter how good you are, be it cheating , drugs , or picking up a 17 year old girl so you can have sex with her, more troublesome driving 2500 miles to pick her up and really thinking your going to get away with it.

Just thinking that makes you a dumb ass , and acting on it makes you stupid.

I cannot even think why A man or a Dominant could think that a 17 year old would even understand the lifestyle , but when you turn it into manipulation that makes it a different story.

When someone thinks they can just pickup a 17 year old girl and think no one is going to miss her or report her missing, then that makes you really stupid.

What I find really upsetting is he was able to form a 501 non-profit on the study of Polyamory, wow really ? Being a convicted sex offender since 2001, you would of thought someone would of caught that..

I am going to share some recent articles along with news paper releases..

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/bdsm-author-allegedly-lured-girl-small-town-sex-family-article-1.2475835

http://www.kswo.com/story/30818181/lawton-author-charged-for-bringing-teen-from-new-york-for-sex

I also have the Arrest Warrant that was shared with me on Facebook , which was more than happy to share all the emails and chats, as they should have…

So it is not like the lifestyle already has a bad name , I am not sure if this will make national news or not Mike is really a nobody…

 

 

 

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/10895088/1-main%20copy.pdf

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/10895088/1-main%20copy.pdf

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/10895088/1-main%20copy.pdf

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/10895088/1-main%20copy.pdf

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/10895088/1-main%20copy.pdf

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/10895088/1-main%20copy.pdf

Training And Online Dominants

Posted in 24/7, Anal Training, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Long Distance Relationships LDR, Manipulation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, slave, submissive, Training And Online Dominants with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 26, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I use to perv the internet a lot, as a matter of fact back in the day, yahoo had one of the best profile search engines on the net. You could go to profiles and just type in a word of interest. Submissive , Slave , Slut , Whore, and one of my favorites Humiliation. Aol had something close to yahoo but yahoo was the place to hunt pussy.

I would pour a big ass glass of Tea , crack my knuckles and go to work.  You could search all over the world, by state , county and city. It was just a total fuck search, maybe that is why yahoo shut it down…

Your looking to enter the lifestyle and your looking for a Dominant, today the first place to look is your PC or Laptop. It is easy a cup of coffee and Google.

Online training is noneffective and has no meaning. Most online Dominants are married and spend spare time when the wifey is not home sitting behind his computer jacking off.

It does not take long until the submissive finds out they are being used. Rules are just sexual self pleasure acts, sending pictures and lots of phone sex. Having you drive someplace in public and Masturbating, or told not to wear panties out in public.

The first thing your told to do is keep a journal, a journal the dominant will never read. A journal of your daily activity’s which to you have very little meaning because there was no explanation on why you should keep such a thing…

The self punishment for not sending nude pics on time, or taking to long to respond to a text…. Self punishment , spanking your pussy until you cry while on the phone with your dominant, clothespins on pussy lips or nipples for long periods of time.
Then you end up spending money you do not have on toys, dildo’s and vibrators , nipple clamps , ohhh and butt plug for anal training.

While the Dominant does have control , that control is very short lived, 30 , 60 maybe 90 days and at times a little longer or until that deep loneliness kicks in..

I have done all of the above. I have used and manipulated , and I have shared pictures with friends that were sent to me. I have told stories how some bitch double fucked herself with two bottles.

I can say Ive never sat in front of my computer and jacked off, I mean its okay but nothing like the real thing…

The Dominant thinks he is in charge but in reality he is just barking orders that have no meaning, and your gullible to follow them until you figure out he is just an ass..

I am not going to say that all online training is not effective because at times , and there are some online relationships that do work and last for years.
Those relationships are those where the dominant has put a plan in place, and works on getting you to him, or him to you. Then again this can fail as well. If you are not the one painting the picture, you never see the finished product until you get to your new home.. Someone can paint a pretty picture and fill your mind with what you need, but you need to know all and have proof before you decide to move 1500 miles..

Over the past ten years or so I have gone through some Major changes. Changes in what type of relationship I wanted, what I wanted in the future, and most important how I saw myself living in a M’s relationship…

Online Dominants are just that, very few have ever had a D’s Or M’s relationship, and chances are they never will… These are men or women who cannot control their own life much less others.

The Topping from the Bottom I spoke about this topic last week, it can be fun , or it can be the death of a relationship.. Someone had contacted me not long ago while I was talking about BDSM and depression. I truly believe a Dominant who suffers from depression , he has no business trying to enter a D’s relationship. Someone who suffers from depression even on medication can only handle so much…

If you are a submissive who is trying to convince a man who suffers from depression you are doing more damage than good, and yes you are Topping from the bottom..

Many online Dominants have anger issues, many use humiliation as a way to control, they feed off of your problems they feed off of your self pity, and your low self esteem. Kinda like a Leech , until you have no blood left , nothing left to give and your left out in the dark alone…

The reason online training cannot work in the long term is because a D’s or M;s relationship is so personal. The Intimacy is so deep , the eye to eye contact, the communication, and last but not least the physical contact.

Many have tried and tried and tried with the results being the same, making the same mistakes thinking the next will be different…

You the submissive has to set ground rules. I email you answer, I ask a direct question, I want a direct answer. I text you I want a text back, I call you answer, providing your not at work. Those are not unrealistic demands.

Vile

My Take On Online BDSM Relationship

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, Aftercare, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Collar, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Rules, BDSM Session, Bipolar, Collar, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Conversation, counselor or Psychiatrists, Depressed, Depression, Discipline, Dominant, Dominants, endorphin's, http://szymonw44.wordpress.com/2014/11/07/myths-and-facts-about-online-ds-relationships/, Humiliation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Online Collar, Online Dominanrt, Protocol, Protocols, psychiatrist, relationships, Rules, session, slave, Sub Drop, Submission, submissive, submit with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 7, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I just read an excellent post from… http://szymonw44.wordpress.com/2014/11/07/myths-and-facts-about-online-ds-relationships/

While I understood much of it there were a few things that were not covered so I wanted to touch base on somethings.

I myself have never been in a online relationship , I have tried and it does nothing for me.
I am strictly hands on and I have never had the desire to have an M’s relationship via the internet.

I have never been a picture collector as well . I myself find it very degrading and most will send pictures just to please , okay that is off topic.

While I can see how one a submissive or slave could reach that endorphin release at that moment and time , I would think that Sub-Drop would begin right after the laptop is powered off.

While I do believe Sub-Drop can be controlled it would not be able to be controlled if you were 500 miles away.

Sub-Drop requires a great deal of emotional understanding , communication and being physical , I mean as far as holding.
Communication is huge right after play or having a session, because you the Dominant wants to pick their brain. How do you feel right now ? What are your thoughts right now ? What were your thoughts during play? How were you feeling ? It just goes on and on.
To be online and then having to power off until the next session, I would imagine it would be pretty lonely.

While I can see the high and the thrill of remaining anonymous while sitting at your keyboard , I can see the downs as well as some dangers.

Even for a new comer there are things that have to be considered. Someones health , how stable are they? Are they taking any medications? do they suffer any type of depression? Does their depression go deeper maybe bipolar. Maybe they hurt themselves when alone or depressed.

I do know of many who have met online and while some have turned out good most have failed.

I have also found many online Dominants are single , and there has to be a reason. Maybe online is a bit easier, there is not as much responsibility when having an online relationship, you do not have the communication needs online like you do in a physical relationship. Then there is a lack of commitment , not having to commit causes less stress.

If one relationship does not work out then I see the advantage of moving on to another and being able to rather quickly.

Being able to remain anonymous means you can be who you want, but so can the submissive, and unless you know their mental state someone could get hurt.
I do know someone will not open up about something so personal online and what happens with the laptop fires up could not have a good turn out.

I have never figured out how you can own someone and just be online. I have never figured out, when people speak of an online collar.

You never really have any control. The only control you have is the control your being told you have. You have no structure or stability with in the relationship. You cannot enforce rules on any level, you are having to go by what your being told.

I do know most online relationships turn sexual in a very short amount of time, and the Dominant is soon demanding pictures and videos. That I never understood since that is not what we are suppose to be about.

Although as Dominants we should never be rescuers , we are here to help. In many cases although we do not have a PHD we are at times a psychiatrist , we are a best friend , we give advice , we communicate , and we offer options based on our experience.

We provide the stability a sub or slave needs in their life, and in a sense we make everything alright. We take away the deep pain and the feeling of not being able to feel.

I have a saying I have used for many years. Come and Let me hold you so I can feel your pain , and today I believe that statement to be true you can feel someones hurt, you can feel someones needs but more so you can feel love.

Like Ive said I have never had an online relationship and I am 51 years old. Ive never wanted an online relationship, again because I am hands on…

While I do believe you can learn a lot online, a submissive or slave can never lern, what it is like to be in a physical relationship.

I found a lot of good from the post ……

http://szymonw44.wordpress.com/2014/11/07/myths-and-facts-about-online-ds-relationships/

I just wanted to add my side..

brad

Much Love Vile