Archive for the being used Category

I Feel Alone

Posted in Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, Bdsm friends, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Structure, Being alone, being used, communication, compatibility, Discipline, Dominant, Dominants, Dominants Protocol, Lies, MAST, Master And Slave, munchs, New age BDSM, Protocols, relationships, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive on March 31, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I am not speaking about my relationship With Arianna , I am speaking in general. I am obsessed with the TV The Walking Dead , and I wonder at times if something like that could really happen?

What I am getting at , I remember the very first Walking Dead , when the Deputy Rick had been shot and was in a comma. Once he woke up and started looking around he realized there were no people around. He walked outside and there was nothing no other humans.

Now I am not going off the deep end just in case your wondering , I am just sharing my thoughts. This is why many Dominant need that interaction at local munchs and MAsT groups so we can interact with those who have the same interest.

Here lately that has not been so easy. Arianna and I have attended several different functions and I have not clicked with anyone. I am not sure if it is a lack of differences , or a lack of how we view the lifestyle. I do know that over the past several years the lifestyle has moved more towards the kink side of things, than the what I call the standard BDSM flow. Being communication, structure protocol and rules , and then on to ownership.

I do at times find it difficult to trust people, I also find it difficult to sociable , but maybe that is just the lack of things in common. Going to different functions allows me to be me , and in hopes of communicating with others who have the same interest. What I do find is others bringing drama into a public setting and that is what the conversation is centered around….

I am still debating on filing for my own MAsT chapter , as of now I do have the support of another MAsT group and would give a good recommendation. It is just finding the right time. There is so much more I want to do , but with moving and getting set up , my new job and yes I consider being at a job for 8 months still new. It was not suppose to be as stressful as it is , but I do enjoy it.

Arianna pointed out several months ago , that some people find me to be intimidating , and I am not sure why unless it is my lack of joking around. She also brought it up that many think it is my way or no way. While I can see her side of things , that is not the whole truth. It comes down to a couple of things. If you portray yourself to be someone your not , if you lie , or if your bringing your problems or drama someplace that is meant to be educational , or if your abusive that is where I draw the line.

Arianna brought it up that I should try being nicer to people , be more open or receptive, and after giving it some thought for a while , I decided to give it a try.
I invited someone to my home , and even offered to take them out, as it turned out I had to work so Arianna met her and spent a great deal of time with. Now I invited with the intentions of just being friends nothing more. I made no out of the way advancements because Arianna was in the loop the whole time, and once the two started texting , I for the most dropped out of the picture, we still chatted on Facebook but it was just friendly chat.
I am more than positive Arianna was a good host, I am also sure Arianna was polite and friendly. So after going to a theme park , out to eat a couple of times, all communication stopped.
So one or two things happened , either I offended her or Arianna was not a good host and was not friendly , which I doubt was the case, at any rate this is the reason I distant myself from people , this is the same reason I have very few friends. This is why I do not allow myself to get close to anyone , because after it was all said and done , I felt as if I was used, no explanation or anything.

In the end it is all good though , I am in a good place and it is my own little world….

Before you start thinking , this is not a pity party because I do not roll like that, I am just expressing my feelings , on this part of life..

horse

Vile

If I Control Your Mind

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, anger, Anger Issues, Arianna, bdsm, being used, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Conversation, Depressed, Depression, Dominance, Dominant, emotional, Emotions, FaceBook Vile Woods, Humiliation, inhibitions, Master, Master And Slave, molding your slave, Patience, Protocol, Respect, Rules, Safe and Sane, slave, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used, submissive or slave has rights with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 15, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

How much of her submission do you want ? Have you ever wanted a Slave or submissive who has no inhibitions? Have you ever wanted a slave or submissive who is 100% compliant ?
Have you ever wanted a relationship where the word argue is not in either ones vocabulary?
Have you ever wanted a Docile pet, Baby Girl, submissive or slave ?
Do you want someone who will follow you without question ?

The truth is you can have all of the above and more. The bad news is it takes a little work on your part, the Dominant, yes you are going to have to put in a little effort.

You know I was chatting with a Dom on Facebook the other day, and he told me his life was basically a wreck, and when I told him he needed a plan, he laughed at me. He laughed and he meant it.

If you the Dominant enters a relationship and you are true about what you want and need, and your willing to put your slave or submissive first, dedicate the time that is needed, you can have anything you want, and I do mean anything, and without question.

Some of you are going to say dude your full of shit, there is no such thing as a relationship like that is there?
I am here to tell you I am living the dream, and you the Dominant can live the dream as well.

BDSM is not about pain or how many bruises you can leave. BDSM is not about humiliation. BDSM is not about barking orders. Most of all BDSM is not about demanding respect or submission, it is about earning both.

You can never demand submission, it does not work that way, but some have it in their mind, I am Dominant and you will submit.
You may luck out and find a submissive who is down and out with a low self esteem, who will follow you for a short time, and meet your silly demands, but that bull shit is so short lived.

Control, that word openings up a whole new world. If your truly in control of yourself, your life, your surroundings the moon is the limit.
Being in full control, you will earn respect, you will earn the right to be called Sir, or Daddy even Master. Those titles what ever they are worth are earned. If you have to demand they mean nothing, nothing at all.

So we go a little deeper, instead of telling someone to crawl to you, or having trouble enforcing rules, not wanting to follow rules.
Why not have someone who wants to crawl to you, or someone who has the need to follow rules, the need to please ?

A D’s or M’s relationship is really easy, it does not require any drama, , no yelling, no getting angry and losing your temper. Just being who you say you are, just doing what you say your going to do, and keep your word, and be nothing but truthful….

Being truthful will help you earn the trust that is needed, and earning the trust will also lead to submission.

One thing that gets to me, is a Dom will say you must always be truthful and he is living a lie. You cannot expect someone to be someone if you are not who you are suppose to be…

This strategy will not only work is a D’s or M’s relationship but much of this can work in a vanilla relationship.

We as men, Dominant or not, we have to value our partner , we have to respect and be thankful for who and what they are, because in the end they are the only ones who will have our back in a time of need.

If you control their mind , for the most as well all know BDSM is mental, BDSM is communication, BDSM is about control and not controlling, BDSM is about having patience, BDSM is about understanding and caring about ones needs.

Being able to fully understand your partner and what makes them tick.
Being able to let your partner rant or share their thoughts without getting angry. Being able to understand when they are feeling funky and just letting them alone for a while.
You would not believe how many arguments could be avoided by using this practice.

You have to learn when it is okay to ignore certain situations and when some needs to be addressed.

I screw everything up, it is all my fault, I did it, I cant do anything right. Come on you have all heard this.
There are times when you just stay quite and let things pass, instead of drilling to find out what is wrong.

I mentioned how important the journal is, this gives the Dominant a great tool to find out where his slave or submissive is coming from.

Communication, several times a day I ask Arianna what is on her mind. She knows this is free time, she can share her thoughts and we talk about them.
Even if it is something that was brought up before, we should be open to talk about it.
Well we have already talked about that so there is no need to bring it up again.
Sure there is and it may have greater importance this time around.

This is how we access the open communication. The slave or sub will feel they can now talk about anything and everything.
This is also a step in the right direction when it comes to trusting.

Although we want to know what they are thinking, we want to know why they are thinking it. I know it sounds complicated but it is really not.

I mentioned the first 90 days of training. The training process is more effective if the two are living together.
Reason being there has to be some form of consistency while training if not , the process can take much longer. The 90 days does not mean training is completed because it never really ends.
As we grow we learn, and the more we learn the more we share. We also want our property to grow as well.

Living together allows you to put rules and protocols in place and the Dominant can be sure they are being followed.

If you the Dominant are in the right frame of mind, your property will want to follow without question.

Getting into the mind that is where you want to be. You should know your property inside out. You want to learn things they have never told anyone else.

Whether you know it or not when you the Dominant shows anger this is a weakness, and it is a weakness they slave or submissive will use against you.
These are buttons that can be pushed and will be pushed. Anger controlling anger take a lot of control and self training.
You want to figure the slave or sub out, what makes them tick, their thoughts , their needs, but if they ever figure you out, it is game over, and showing your anger, and being abusive, be it verbal, mental or physical, you just might as well pack up your bags.
Being happy in a relationship is one thing, but a submissive no matter how happy they may be if they are not getting what they need, it will be found somewhere else.
I know I am speaking from experience. Once you lose that control, it is nearly impossible to regain, I know I lost.
The best way to start is to think before you speak, think about how it is going to sound coming out of your mouth.

An angry mans words are a calm mans thoughts, that is true, just like a drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts. So thinking before we speak, taking in that deep breath, really makes a world of difference.

The calmer your are, the more in control you are, the greater the submission will grow.

What many of us fail to see is there is no right way, we all have different needs, finding the right partner to fill that void is the right way.
The last thing we should do or want to do is try to change someone. We can improve but to change is not fair…

mind

Vile

Do You Know What Training Really Is ?

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Argue, Arianna, ass fucking, Baby Girl, bdsm, being used, commitment, communication, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Conversation, cunt, Daddy Dom, Deception, Depressed, Depression, Dominance Through Intimidation, Giving Head, Humiliation, infidelity, married, Married Dominant, Master & Slave, Master And Slave, Meeting a Dominant for the first time, poly, Polyamory, Rules, Safe and Sane, selfish, slave, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 25, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Lets take cock sucking out of the picture, while we are at it lets take a rule out a lot of you have, or have had.
Your not allowed to cum for a month, or maybe even two months

The second I spoke about is pure ego, and nothing more. The you are not allowed to touch your pussy or cum without my permission was something I did when I was in my twenties. If I had come across anyone who had been in the lifestyle for anytime when I said those words I was laughed at. They knew then I was not a experienced Dom.

Before you begin your Training there are a few questions you need to ask yourself.
1. Is this lifestyle really for me? You know your own feelings, but much research must be done, before being able to correctly answer.
2. Why do I need to be trained?
3. What do I hope to get out of being trained by a Dominant ?
4. Just how far do I want to go ?
5. What are some of my limits ? You probably have an idea, but you also may need to explore.
6. What Type of Dominant or Master should I be looking for ?
Remember we are all different , we all have different values, and methods. Some are very strict, while some are not. Some have rules and protocols while some do not. Some want to see their property excel in life, while others will still care about you but you are more of a physical object.

These are just a few of the questions you need to ask yourself before you begin your journey. Know what you need is very important. Never let anyone tell you what you need, or how they are going to change you.

Meeting your new Dominant and taking an assessment should be done while you are getting to know each other. This covers many areas.
Your health should be talked about in depth, medications, phobias as well. Your work should be discussed, as well as family and friends.

Here is a list of health questions I used.
Do you have any dietary restrictions?
Are you allergic to anything? (Scene materials as well as common allergies)
Do you wear contact lenses or glasses? Dental bridges or hearing aids?
Do have any injuries that can keep you from service or play type training? (Neck, back, knee injuries)
Do you have any ongoing illnesses or chronic problems? What type of medications or treatments do you take for these?
Make a list of all the vitamins, herbal or nutritional supplements your take?
When was your last blood test and physical? Will you be willing to take a blood test or physical?
Do you use recreational drugs (including alcohol or tobacco)? What? How Often?
Do you have any addictions or are you struggling with an addiction?
Are you recovering from an addiction? Are you clean and/or sober? How long?
Have you suffered from abuse as a child? As an adult? (Physical, verbal, psychological, sexual, spiritual)
If so, are there any triggers that can cause you trauma now?
Do you abuse others, or have abused others, in the past? How have you addressed these problems?
Have you ever had any type of sexually transmitted disease? How was it, or is it, being treated?

All of these questions are very important, this is one of the ways besides communication you get to know someone. This will also prevent someone from getting hurt.

While there may not be a cure for many mental illnesses, I do believe that under the right house, and the proper structure , most can be kept under control, and managed.

Clarification. You will need clarification on the entire process. You will want to know what will be expected of you.

If you work or have children there will be limitations that will have to be put into place.

Just so you know this is not a Wham Bam Thank You Process. These discussions is something that should take place over time. This is a courtship, this is the getting to know each other time.
Go out to eat, catch a movie, long walks. The most important thing is to take your time. Communication is the most important thing in your relationship, but and there is a but, compatibility plays a major role.

Call me Sir, call me Master, call me Daddy, never fall for those demands. Each title no matter what should be earned and not demanded.

The RULE thing is never really clear, a lot of Dominants want to start out with rules before even entering a relationship.
Once your relationship gets to that point, when a Rule is giving out, there should be a clear explanation on why that rule is being put into place.

One thing I do and did, when I explained something to Arianna, I explained it in such a way there were no questions. Everything must be very clear.

It is also impossible to be told to memorize 30 or 40 rules. If the Dominant expects you to remember each and everyone , then he should be able to repeat them all.

We all have training ideas, but what works for one will not work for another.
The one thing you have to remember you are being trained to fit someone’s needs, it is you that will have to adapt to your new world, not the Dom.

In many cases you may need to be trained, looking for that structure in your life, or you may be perfectly fine, and your just entering a D’s or M’s relationship, at any rate you are still going to adapt to someone else’s world. Your life is going to really go through changes.

Some of the things that are important to us, is our family, we also need friends, you need to be able to go out, we all need down time.
During your negotiation part you need to make sure you will still be allowed to do the above.

If the Dominant you are meeting tells you he is married, make sure the spouse is okay with what he is doing. This is where it gets tricky because you cannot just take his word, after all if his wife says its okay for him to see other people, then it should be okay for you to talk to her.

He will come off well my wife is a bitch, she does not understand me, she does not fulfill my needs, she is always nagging.
Well!!! If things were really all that bad he would not be there.
I am staying because of the children. Yea that is a lame excuse.
He is cheating because she will not suck cock or take it up the ass but you will.
Remember you are now number two , and you will always be number two.
No Birthdays, no Holidays, no vacations, you are just a secret.

Training should start almost immediately once the two have agreed to enter a D’s or M’s relationship. The most effective way to train is while you are living together.
If your Dominant is a once a month warrior then you are not really going to get the whole picture.
This also happens when you see someone who is married, your in it for the benefits, and he is in it for the ass, and nothing more.

You the Submissive or Slave should have a good idea when it comes to what your looking for, and what your needs are. This is something you need to cover as well.
When you meet a new Dominant, and you are to intimidated or scared to talk openly about your needs then he is the wrong Dom for you.
A Dominant should make you feel at ease, relaxed. He should be easy to speak to, and not make any demands.
If you cannot speak freely and express your needs, how can you fully submit to him?

The first meeting all eyes should be on you. You should be doing all the talking, and the Dominant should have his total attention on you. If your shy he will keep the conversation flowing with questions
During this time he is taking in all the information. This is the time he is putting a training program together in his head.

Your question should be what does your training consist of? What do you think I will get out of your training ?

What are your protocols ? Are your protocols just private or are they public as well?

One thing I did, is I would request a journal be started something I could read everyday or week. I did not have to do that with Arianna because she had ten years worth of journals, so I really got a deep look inside her life.

There are rules and then there is sex. The two should never be mixed. Rules are meant to provide structure, and guidance.

A rule telling you to send a video on your anal training does not benefit you at all. You being told as a rule to send nude pics, does not benefit you at all.
If these are the things he is interested in, then he does not have your best interest in mind.

Being trained is real, and you need to be sure you are in the hands of someone who really cares about you. Someone who has open communication.
Our lifestyle is you are a True D’s or M’s is a mind thing. It is all about the Dominant getting inside your head, and having the ability to stay there, keeping you in that submissive frame of mind.

The first 90 days Arianna had almost zero freedom. She was allowed to call and visit family, she has a dear friend she was allowed to see, and of course work.
Other than the things above she spent 90 days learning Viles way.
Rules a few at a time, protocols, again Viles way, learning in service. Learning how to be a host in an M’s home.

The first thing I did, was introduce her to friends I had within the community.
Why did I do this? She has been in two Bad D’s relationships prior to me.
I told her I had been in the lifestyle for more than 20 years. So not that I had anything to prove, I introduced her to very close friends who had known me , here in the local community. This was a way to validate myself. I am who I said I was.

Any Dominant who tells you he has been in the lifestyle for 20 years knows people in the lifestyle, and he should be more than willing to introduce you to his friends.
99% of the time he will be active in the local community, if he is not then something happened.
It does not take much for a Dominant to get a bad name, and once your shunned , there is really not much he can do as far as meeting new subs or slaves, unless it is Via Collarme or something.
That should be a bad sign if he tells you he has no friends in the local community.
I know and I know others who need that interaction. We need to be able to talk to our friends, someone we can relate to.

There are warning signs to look for, and many times you see them but you over look them because you think he could be the one.
Well! he is nit the one, because there are thousands of ones out there, and if you settle for less than what you need, your relationship will be short lived.

Many Dominants who have no real life experience will try to isolate you, because they are still in the insecure mode. The married Dominant will even more isolate you, because you are his fuck toy on the side.
These are also warning signs you need to look out for, keeping you isolated is where the abuse begins, and once it starts you are the only one who can stop it.

You are a submissive you have the right to question, more so you have the right to say no.

Remember everything is a negotiation , this is when you talk about your needs, what you expect out of the relationship, as well as your limits.
You want everything out on the table, so there are no surprises.

Now the most important issues. What are you going to get out of the relationship? If you are not living together , how much time will be devoted to you?
Is the relationship going to be one on one or he is Poly? That is a very important question, if you do not ask he may bring it up at a later date.

If you are asked a direct question then give a direct answer, and do not tell something someone wants to hear, be honest.
If you ask a direct question you expect a direct answer.

If your going to submit, you cannot submit on your terms, if you happen to find a Dom who will allow you to do this , then what kind of Dominant is he ?

Also it is not that you will not have any say , but your whole thought process will be different, you are now in the follow position. The Dominant will lead you will follow.

When you first meet asking the proper questions, and giving honest answers would prevent so much drama and heartache. Many for what ever reason are to intimidated to speak up. If the Dominant has caused this, then you need to step away before even meeting him, so there is no connection.

You cannot gain a connection over the internet alone, well it can be done if both are honest. The truth is we can be who ever we want to be, and make you believe most anything without even meeting.

Married Dominants, they do not want a relationship with you. You will never be able to experience what the D’s lifestyle is truly like. You will never get that one on one attention you need, he will never be available when you need him, but he has agreed to take care of you, he has agreed to be there for you. The truth is that will never happen.
He will never leave his wife, his home, his cars, nor his children, nor is he going to part with his money.
Why would he leave he has the best of both worlds? He has everything at home, and someone who will suck his cock on the side. The truth hurts huh?

In the lifestyle training is for the betterment of the submissive or slave.
You have to decide if you want to be part of a growing relationship, or just a piece of ass on the side that no one knows about. The dirty little secret you cannot even talk about, because your married Dom is afraid you will blow his cover.
Sitting at home on your couch, crying because you cannot get a reply to a text is no way to live.
He cannot text because he is having a cookout with his wife and kids.
The biggest myth is you are the only one he is seeing on the side, if you believe this then you are dumber than your Dom thinks you are already, and yes he thinks your Dumb, he thinks you can do no better, and he thinks you are wrapped around his fingers, and when you leave after a year or so he will find someone to take your place. You are not an asset and never will be.
He will keep you until you become either to needy, or a burden to him. Keep your cock sucker shut and things will go as he had planned

This is why it is very important when a Dominant says he wants to train you, you need to get clarification on what he means.

You have the right to explain your needs, and you need to be sure they are going to be met, before you enter the relationship, because once his lies start they are never ending.

Training is meant to be one on one with no interventions. You should be the Dominants main focus during this time.
Telling you that you are not allowed to cum is not training , and I will tell any Dom or Master face to face he is full of fucking shit.

You calling him Sir, Daddy, or Master, and in his mind he is calling you an idiot.

Does anyone know the Definition of the word CUNT?
Cant understand normal thinking.

Men fall under this category as well it is not only women, because I meet stupid everyday, and I meet a lot of CUNTS

If you stay focused you will go far, if you stick to your plan you will go far. If you stick to your goals in life you will go far. If you make sure your needs are met you will go far.

The only way you can be trained is through someone being consistent, consistency is the KEY.

focused

Yours Truly
Vile

Slave Contracts When They Can Be Broken

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Argue, bdsm, Bdsm events, being used, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Discipline, Dominance Through Intimidation, emotional, Emotions, FaceBook Vile Woods, Fake Dominants, Guidelines, Inservice Slave, Keeping submissive Isolated, Master, Master And Slave, punish, Punishment, Safe and Sane, slave, Slave Contract, Structure, Submission, submissive, submissive or slave has rights with tags on July 16, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Slave Contracts are used by two types of Dominants or Masters.
Those with no experience and they are trying to show their authority, and by those who are into extreme ownership.

Contract are used at times to intimidate someone , this happens when you have someone new who knows nothing about the lifestyle. After the signing they do get a different feeling, but it depends on how the slave is being treated. If abused then the slave will feel trapped.
Please refer to the Red Flag post.
If they are being treated as promised, then a great feeling of security. The feeling of being wanted and needed, everything is provided.

The novice Master quickly loses control of reality , now he is in charge, he now owns someone, he now has property. He can now do what ever he sees fit, without caring about someones feelings or emotions, or what the toll is doing to someone.
There is a huge difference between someone who is in control and someone who is controlling, we all know that but when your playing with someones life, it can get pretty bad, on a emotional level.

So as a Slave you do have certain rights , if you singed a contract, in the contract the Master said he would take care of you, Physically and Emotionally . If all of your needs are not being met you have the right to void the contract.
I found this below and I wanted to share

Bea Amor, Yahoo Contributor Network
Sep 18, 2008

You have the right to feel safe.

You have this right irrespective or whether you are submissive or slave. You have the choice as a slave to choose someone who will make you feel safe as this is your sole choice and you need never be in a position where fear is all you know. If you are, this means you have no one to blame but yourself for not choosing the right dominant and for not leaving when you find that this is his or her style of dominance. If you are in a position where you are being held against your will, you need to find a way of escape or indicating distress at the first available opportunity.

You have the right to your emotions and feelings.

As a Slave you have a right to your own feelings and to express them. It does not matter whether they are positive or negative, they need to be discussed whenever they happen for you. Submission does not work in the absence of communication. As a slave you have no right to withhold this from your master or mistress. That person cannot control your life and make good decisions that will not harm you if you do not share the feelings you are feeling.

You have the right to expect happiness in life.

Remember that you chose this lifestyle because you weren’t happy with people who did not know how to handle your submission? Remember that you discovered great joy when you found out that you are not just needy or codependent? You have the right to enjoy this lifestyle and feel all the joy you are getting. It took guts to admit your submission and you are allowed to pick the fruits of honesty.

You have the right to have input in a relationship.

You have the right to communicate openly and honestly and to have say in any relationship – a relationship by definition is a two way street and should never be one sided. You need to make sure that you make your needs known and that you make sure that you are always present in the relationship. Slaves also have this right but they exercise the right when they choose a dominant or master or mistress. Your needs, desires and wants should be discussed in detail before any collar is placed around your neck.

You have the right to belong.

As a Slave you finally can exercise this right. You are now in a family of people who feel the same way you do and who understand who and what you are. You will belong to that special dominant soon or may already belong to someone. Slaves and Slave alike both have that right.

You have the right to be loved and to love.

You have the right to be loved for your submission and to love the person who will control your life and use you to serve them. Love is something that happens in most D/s relationships contrary to what you might have heard. Love also makes you submission bloom. Remember that slaves sometimes have different ideas of what love looks like. They might want someone who humiliates and hurts them and does objectify them. To them that might show love. Never look down on what others perceive as love and celebrate the differences.

You have the right to be healthy.

I would love to change this to you have a duty to be healthy. Health is a requirement for slaves and this is not negotiable. You have to make sure that you are in a healthy relationship and that you do not get abused. If you are, the entire community will rally to your aid should you request it.public

Vile

BDSM And The Dominant

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, anger, Bad Dominant, bdsm, being used, commitment, communication, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Dominant, Dominants, slave, Submission, submissive on July 5, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have received a lot of comments these past few days. Many were from submissive’s who had been abused, and a few who had been punked by married men.
I use the word punked , they were bull shitted , lied to, mislead. Abused by partners, and lied to by married men.

Ladies, Baby Girls, Submissive’s, and Slaves those are not Dominants. Those are not who you would want to be in control of your life. Those are not who you would want to follow. Those are not the men who you want to take care of you.

I would like to add being a Dominant is not an easy task, we have a great deal of responsibility and depending on the depth of the relationship, some many not even understand how deep ones relationship is, or the responsibility that is truly on the Dominants shoulders.

Before we start this relationship , I want you to be honest with me 100%. I want you to always tell me the truth no matter what.

I run my house, I have always ran my house, and I can assure you I always will.

We are not abusive, we do not yell or call you names, out of anger. We do not lie to you, nor do we lie to anyone else..

Several years ago I drove a Tractor Trailer, local, I delivered hospital linen. Heavy fucking work, and manual labor is not in my genes. I only worked 4 days a week but it was like 51 hours in 4 days.
The supervisor came in early one morning and a driver was unloading the truck and the back door was busted. Someone did not strap in the carts tight enough and they banged against the door.
So Dave said what happened to the door? The drive said Vile did it last night. Dave said no he did not, the driver then asked Dave how do you know? Vile would of told me.
That my friends is the truth.

We are in full control, we are in full control of our home, our surroundings , and our life. We show total love and devotion, we take care of ours.

There are several signs you are nothing more than a hole or a mouth used for a cum dump.
You cannot take part in your partners FaceBook. Really? Your on Fetlife but you are not acknowledged, or even on friends list. Or you make comments on things but you never get a reply. If your not included any any of your doms outside activities. If you do not have 24/7 access. then you are not a priority. You see all of these signs but you ignore them.
You give up all of your passwords, for what reason I do not have a clue, but your not allowed to know anything or really be a part of your Doms life. You see all of these signs but then you don’t really, and by the time you wake up, a couple of years have gone by, and those are years you cannot get back.

I know I rant and rant about abuse and what to look for, but the truth is there is only a few who has said hey Vile is right.

Even when You ask questions if its not the answer you want to hear, then you just ignore it, even when all your friends are telling you the same thing.

So for now you just sit and wait.

Vile

I have Never Been So Offended

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, Acceptance, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, being used, Living Poly, Living Triad, Married Dominant, Master And Slave, slave, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used on July 2, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

As the world knows Arianna and I have been looking at the possibility of adding a third to our home.
This is to add to the family. This is meant to not improve anything it is meant to help. At this point and time there is nothing that needs to be improved.

The third has nothing to do with sex, nor does it have anything to do with any kink. We meaning both wants to open our door and allow someone into our home.

You can take three and make a couple a triad a rectangle all ends connect, everyone is within arms reach. You function as one, everyone is there to help each other
The third is there to help the first, to be best friends, to the point they both feel like sisters. They both work together, there is no alpha or beta. Arianna would not be in charge but she would give direction.

Since my first post about us searching I have mentioned nothing about sex, kink bondage anything when it came to forming a Triad.
In the lifestyle it is hard for those who are submissive or slaves to find and keep friends. Most are full of problems and drama, and once they latch onto someone, they are the garbage dump.

So I will fix the problem we shall add another to our home. Let me explain something. This has nothing to do with looks per-say , it has nothing to do with your build, and it has nothing to do if your Bi sexual or not. It has to do with the submissive. It has to do with how well the submissive gets along with Arianna. Arianna is the deal breaker.

Lets forget about Vile for now , because Vile is out of the picture, until Arianna says Master there is a possibility here. Then I step in.
Now from the beginning the submissive and I would get to know each other, once you pass the nutty list, I then introduce the two of you, and I am out of the picture.

Again I have mention nothing about sex. This is not about sex, this is about forming a close tight family. A family that works together.

So this Baby girl who lives with her alpha, in their own apartment, their daddy is married and they both think hes going to leave his wife. He pays none of their bills because he wants them to be independent he treats the alpha like a princess then the beta is a tag along, he does not even have sex with her.
She is never included in any of the vacations, and she cannot see she is being used. So we had been talking, and I am thinking okay this may just work.
We had a lot in common, the same interest and our talks were not about sex.

Her comment was I was looking for a third for all the wrong reasons. I wanted lust. Lust was making me look for a third. I was only interested in sex.
This is someone who was supposedly following mine and Ariannas blog. It now seemed like she was saying Arianna was nothing or she meant nothing to me, it was just Lust. Wow

The lag post I did about abuse, and isolation, making her shut her blog down because she wanted to meet others like her. yup

We have a lot to offer the right one, a very loving home, with no drama, no arguing, no fighting, no abuse, and being part where everyone helps each other grow, it has nothing to do with LUST
Vile

To Those Who Cheat

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, Advice, anal sex, anger, Anger Issues, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, Being fucked, being used, Cheat, Cheaters, cheating, Cheating Dominant, cock sucking, commitment, communication, consequences, consistent, control, controlling, Conversation, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Discipline, Dominant, Dominant Switch, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, Fake Dominants, Lies, married, Married Dominant, Master And Slave, morals, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, sucking dick, Vile, Vile Woods on FaceBook, Wedding Vows on June 1, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I give my opinions nothing more , I may not be much but I am a man with Morals, I am a man with pride, I am a man who lives by the truth , but most of all I am a man who is loyal to the end.

I was stuck in a bad marriage for 9 years because I was at Bush Gardens one year and as I was sitting there watching all these married couples pass me by who had children , I started thinking man I am missing out on a lot. The wife, the kid the dog, the house with a fence, cooking out with the smith’s I was missing out on something very special.

Chong had just left maybe I was just feeling lonely, my feelings were mixed, my mind was going a thousand miles an hour. So I found a wife. To this day I harbor some guilt, not because I still love her, that is so far from the truth, but because I lead her down a false path, I made her believe I was someone else, and for 8 1/2 years I lived a lie. The longer we were married to more it tore me up on the inside, I was dieing to get the fuck out, but I was going to try one thing. I was going to come clean about who I was and what I needed. Well that did not go over so well, and being married to the church lady did not help the situation at all. So I was asked to leave, and it was not until after I moved out Bea and I came into play. Now I had met Bea on line but we had not met each other until I moved out.

We had a son while I was married he will be 16 this year, and here is part of my morals coming out. I have not missed a child support payment in 16 years, although it is court ordered it does not come out of my pay check. 16 years not one payment has been missed and for many years I paid twice the amount that I was suppose to because I knew how she was struggling.  Again part of my morals.

Part of my morals when we were married I took vows, and many of you wrote your own vows, you swore to stand by each other through thick and thin for better or worse. You said it looking into each others eyes, and your husband or wife believed you, they took what you said to heart and trusted you.

Now there are circumstances that comes into light than can change those vows, If you are being abused, be it mentally or physically.. If you catch your spouse cheating, that is the unforgivable sin in my home. I told Arianna first thing if you cheat make sure that is who you want to be with because that is where you are moving. I refuse to sleep with someone who has been where I lay. The unforgivable sin, if you fuck around you are dead in my eyes.

Okay so we change, we are human, our needs change, not wants our needs. We begin to age and we want more out of life, so this is where the communication comes into play. You do have the right to express your needs, you have the right to tell your spouse how you have changed. If your spouse refuses to comply or try, then you have the right to leave, remember the VOWS you took now, for better or worse.

So the female cheats because she is not getting her kink met, her husband no longer communicates with her, they are no longer on the same intellectual level, hes hanging with the boys at the bar. You have the right to communicate, you have the right to express your needs. What you do not have the right to do is let someone other dude bang you and then go home to the man who has built the roof over your head, the man who pays your bills the man who puts food on your table, the father of your children, because this other dude is not going to share any of that responsibility, he is there for the pussy. The bad news is, the relationship will be short lived and you will be back to square one. The truth is you will get caught it is not when but how. You have to think is it fair to drag your children into your mess, to drag your whole family into your mess. Is it fair to catch something you cannot get a shot for and pass it on to your spouse. Again you took Vows.

The male who cheats, once a cheater always a cheater. So his wife will not suck cock, or refuses to do anal. He knew this before he took his what ? His Vows he knew this ahead of time, but at that point and time it was not a need because he had a steady piece of ass, he was or is getting a steady piece almost every night but the one thing missing was the cock sucking, being able to get the ass. Now it becomes a need because you told him no. If you tell a man NO then he needs it, it is in bedded in his brain now he has to have it.

Now we have google, I found Bea through yahoo profile searches which was the best. all you had to do was go to profiles and type in submissive or slave and a million names popped up. I had the world at my finger tips. The internet is a powerful mother fucker, you can find anything, including a bitch that will suck cock. someone who will take it up the ass, someone who will crawl to you,and someone who will sit by their phone and wait for your text or call.

You found your married Dom your married daddy. He is married to the worst bitch in the world, shes a fucking cunt, she is worthless, she is a bad mother, he wishes he was not still married to her, but you saved him your just what he needs now. He has been assuring you he is going to leave, but the time has to be right.

The bad thing is you fall for it, and you wait and you wait and you wait, but it never comes , he never moves out, even though she is so bad. She will not communicate with him, she will not have sex with him, she does not connect with him, she is so so bad, but he never leaves.

The truth is everything is fine on the home front except the sucking cock part, or the ass fucking, being able to tie you up, being able to spank you, you know the little things his bad wife wont do, but she does cook clean, probably works as well, and takes care of his children. He takes them out, they go on vacations together, school functions, they have cook outs with the smiths, while you sit and stare at your phone.

I am telling you this as a man not a pissed off woman, I am letting you in on how a male thinks , because I do not want to see you be someones bitch who is just there to suck cock once or twice a month.

If his life was so bad and he was treated so bad, you know what ? He would leave. He would pack his shit up and move the fuck out no matter the cost. No man is going to stay where he is not happy its not going to happen. On the other hand if he can stay home and get ass on the side, he will ride the storm out.

You know 30 years ago if you caught something you could go to the doctor and get a shot. Today that is not true, and most of you do not enforce any type of protection, putting your own life in danger. In the end you will be stuck alone, and your Dom or daddy is still cooking out with the smiths.

Some men for what ever reason are just close minded, I know dudes who don’t even like blow jobs, I know dudes who think anal sex is nasty. Some men see tying you up and spanking you as abuse. Some are just that stupid. A woman can tell their husband here I am you can do anything you want, and they think your sick, they think you need help. Like you I do not get it nor do I understand it.

If your an unhappy submissive and you have talked to your husband and he will not come around, if your kink means that much to you then leave. If you need to submit and he will not fill that dominant role then leave, but you better hope the one you move in with is going to be able to provide for you on all levels.

To the women who are subs or baby girls, and your seeing a married man.. He is not going to leave his wife, he is not going to leave the stability he has. He is not going to leave the mother of his children There are a few who will very few, but you have to look at his side of the world can you fill the shoes his wife can, because everything today comes down to money. If his wife is making a hundred grand a year and your making thirty grand a year, go on think about it, or maybe your not even working, the odds are not there, but if your a betting woman, go ahead and roll the dice.

I am just ranting, if your being cheated on it is not fair, if your the cheater its not fair. Somewhere in your head or heart if your seeing a married man, you have to be thinking about his wife, the one who gave birth to his children, the one who has built what he has, the one who has stood by all his bull shit. How would you feel if you were being cheated on? In a way you are because hes banging both of you.

Remember all you get is one side of the story, his side. If he says she does not care what he does, then it should be alright for you to talk to his wife. Last if you think you are the only one he is banging, your really dumb.

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Vile