Archive for the Cheating Dominant Category

Fifty Shades Darker

Posted in abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Cheating Dominant, Christian Grey, commitment, communication, Dominant, Fifty Shades Darker, Fifty Shades Of Gray, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Married Dominant, Master and slave relationship, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, The Secretary, Uncategorized, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , on August 2, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Most Doms or Masters have skills many skills , be it play , communication , staying consistent in training among other things but one very important skill is the skill to negotiate a relationship.

I was somewhat taken back by the first 50 shades so when 50 shades darker came out , I thought okay Mr Grey can redeem himself.. Well that did not happen , instead he lowered himself to almost animal waste.

I do give credit for the books and the movies though it brought millions into the lifestyle some serious and to some they found out it was just a fantasy.

It is not uncommon to renegotiate a contract be it written or verbal. We continue to grow on a daily basis and our needs change. A Dominant may see where some changes are needed and may just act or he may sit down and communicate his needs. The Submissive or Slaves needs may change and may want to sit down and request some changes. I myself do not make a decision right then I want to take some time to think about what was discussed.

To see Mr Grey kneel about beg was truly disappointing , although we as Masters should show the ability to be humble at times, what Mr Grey did was truly humiliating to see him beg. On his knees admitting he was not a Dominant but still wanting to renegotiate , renegotiate what?

Most women loved the sex scenes , some were pretty intense but to put those into our world of BDSM just gives a false look into the way we live.

Outside of the movie jumping into real life, suck my dick , you broke a rule you burnt my chicken now ive got to beat you , or you failed to send my pics while your at work. I want videos of you masturbating , I want your passwords , I want your banking info. This is no way the characteristics of a Dominant , this is pure ego , insecure , the need to abuse and think its alright because your in charge.

Our life is so deep very few understand even those like E.L. James who tried her best to let people take a peak into our life. If you do not live something you cannot write about it.  Our life has such a wide base many do not understand but are very intrigued. People trying to interpret our life would be like me trying to write a book on how a nuclear submarine , hows its built and keeps generating power.

I have changed over the years , I have been the abuser , I have been the user , I have made false promises , I have giving false hope. Many years I felt women were just a dumping station many had no faces. My only concern was how to use all three holes.

The art of manipulation and for some it never ends , its a game that is never won , because in the end you crawl into your bed alone. This goes for both male and female, one thing we all have to remember we are a commodity and the older we get the less our stock is worth. Manipulation is not hard but staying on that path with one does not last very long.

Any man can find someone to suck his cock , or take it up the ass but to be able to take control , and finding someone who will give up the amount of control you want is an art. It meaning days , weeks , months and in some cases years to find the one who fits your needs , Dominant or Submissive.  Hours of conversation , days, weeks , months getting to know each other.

The Dominant must be secure , the Dominant must know who and what he is, the Dominant must know how to be fair, true and loyal to his word. The Dominant must make it clear when it comes to his needs and wants.

When you meet a Dominant and you are explained his needs and wants , how he runs his house and what is expected , if you have any doubts or your not able to fulfill his needs then he is not the right Dominant for you. If he backs down on anything he has presented and gives in , there will come a time when the subject will come up at a later date. The same goes for the submissive if you lay out your needs and the Dominant disagrees then you need to move on. You may meet 25 , 30 , 40 or even 50 Dominants before you find the right fit. You know within the first couple of minutes if you are compatible and if your not why even continue?

More of the community today is about kink and only kink , but there are just as many submissives and slaves who are looking for so much more. Most who are submissive are looking for much more when it comes to a relationship , although kink will play a huge part there are many other factors. Many are looking for security , communication , wanting to turn over power to someone they can trust.  Guidance is huge , structure , and yes even discipline when a rule is broken, being held accountable , but many who claim to be a Dom , or Master turn their backs on the basic ideology of the lifestyle , trying to convince the submissive they know the way.

Making a movie that is realistic , instead of a kinky Billionaire begging some girl for pussy why not a average guy? If the dude had lived in a trailer and worked at McDonalds then he would of been a creep.

You know if you just want to fuck why not just ask instead of trying to run a game , if your married why not be upfront instead of hiding your marriage like some little bitch. Ive met married Doms who cheat and once they get home they turn into the bitch. If the dude cant run his own home , if the dude cant control his wife or his house , if the dudes wife wont submit , then how in the fuck can he truly control someone else? The dude is living a fantasy , the dude wants to find someone to do things his wife wont do. Dont get me wrong there are some who are ok with seeing a fake married Dom and if both are ok with the situation then do it, but if you are married and misleading someone your balls needs to be cut off because your a pussy.

I hoped before watching the first 50 shades that someone would step up and show a true side of the lifestyle but I learned in the first 30 minutes it had nothing to do with a real Dominant but a man with control issues who suffered from depression, a man who wanted to hurt someone just for the sake of hurting someone.  A quote, Why do you want to hurt me? For your pleasure , really? Yea he said that.

Many do not take into consideration of the damage you can do to someone male or female. Leading someone down a false path and once your caught they put the blame on them like its their fault.

Guys , Masters , Dominants if you are who you claim to be you can live the dream, if you walk the walk and talk the talk, hmmm I think that is right? Your life could grown into something you cant even imagine. There is so much more to the relationship , its not about just sucking cock , or fucking some chick up the ass, it take work but the end result would be incredible…

Vile

 

 

 

Pussy To Man is Like The Apple To Adam

Posted in abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Cheating Dominant, Dominance Through Intimidation, fucking, Giving Head, Manipulation, Slave, Submission, Submissive being used, sucking cock, Uncategorized on February 6, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Most men will crawl naked through broken glass if they think they are going to get laid.

To some pussy is an addiction, an uncontrollable addiction, and at times it interferes with their daily life.

This is where the games come into play. Telling you what you want to hear just to get you on you’re back.

Now your feelings do not come into play nor do you’re emotions.

There is however an easier way but it does take a little work.

To get into ones mind is an incredible feat. To figure out how someone thinks is an incredible feat. Once in the mind you own it. There are no limits to the growth, there are no limits at all.

A submissive or slave are only looking for a few things in life.

Security , Trust, knowing they are cared for , someone to take responsibility for their actions.

Most men are the worst communicators in the world , I suppose some are scared , but my guess is many just do not care.

If it turns out a man is Dominant but his wife is not submissive he then feels bad about approaching her with the idea of D’s or bringing up the kink. He may feel like it is abuse. The problem is by not communicating he then turns to cheating , finding someone he has no emotional feelings for, someone he can use and go home with no connection. This is his way of justifying his actions. Once he is caught he will turn the tables around and make it her fault for not fulfilling his needs.

I have a friend well not really a friend we talk from time to time, but he spends all of his spare time on Match and Plenty of fish. He spends hours hunting and once someone bites he insist they come to his place. Once he has the pussy he is done, he then finds a reason why he should not enter a relationship with them. They lie , they are needy , they cant be with him 24/7 but he does not want them to move in.  It is never his fault , by placing the blame it makes him feel better.  Use and out the door , no feelings or emotions…

Some 10 years ago I use to drive a cab part time , believe it or not those dudes make a decent living. I picked up a family of 4 husband and wife , 2 kids and she was smoking hot, I mean blood rushed down to my dick so fast I got dizzy  she was that hot.

Once we reached the Hilton the guy handed me a hundred on a 35,00 dollar fair. He tapped me on the shoulder and asked me to wait for him while he took everything to his room. Once back down he entered the front seat and wanted to know where the hookers were?

Okay there are some respectable workers today who work and make a lot of money , a lot of money , but what he was looking for was a 20.00 dollar hooker a crack head. I reached in my pocket and handed him 65.00 dollars and told him I had a call .

This guy was willing to put his wife and family in jeopardy , he was willing to take the risk of catching something and passing it to his wife, is this true love ?

When dating someone new this is the time to be honest , by the second or third date both should begin to open up. If you the man likes getting your cock sucked and the new girl friend does not like sucking cock guess what ? It is not going to work. She may like anal sex but you the male thinks its disgusting for what ever reason , guess what ? It is not going to work. If you like bondage and spanking but she does not guess what ? It is not going to work.

Honesty is everything , being truthful about you’re needs, if down the road the kink side comes up sit you’re partner down and talk , talk a lot about the feelings you are having , why the feelings came up. There is a great chance he or she may come around , if not guess what ? You gotta suck it up because you knew before you entered the relationship , and if it comes up later and you talk and the answer if no you should suck it up if you really love and respect.

The lifestyle relationships be it a D’s or M’s or what ever category you put yourself in. Being new is a mother fucker because you are going to be used and dumped a half dozen times before you get it right. Men who do not take the lifestyle serious and are out just for the pussy and nothing more. He sees submission as a weakness , he knows he can use you and use you for a long time , leading you down a road of broken promises and promising things will get better.

The breakup you think it is your fault and of course he will put the blame on you, this will make him feel better, while you sit and feel sorry for yourself. The problem is you knew all along something was wrong.

It took me years to realize it was harder playing the game that it was to be truthful . I stepped over so many hurdles just to get a little head or some pussy by the time it was over I felt like I had wasted so much time and got nothing. It also took me years to realize the damage I had done to others , emotionally , mentally and physically. The truth is I did not care I was getting my nut.

If you want the pussy be up front you might be surprised how many are looking for a no strings relationship , eat date and fuck then you go home. That would make things simple.

You the male Dominant can have anything you want , sure it takes work , sure it takes devotion , sure it takes caring , sure it takes being honest , but the rewards out weigh the bad if you are looking for bad. We can all find something bad if that is what you are looking for. I myself concentrate on the good, and if you continue to look for good there will be no bad.

I made it a point once I figured out who and what I was, what I needed and wanted out of a relationship. I was determined to find the right one, the one who could fulfill my needs and wants, but in return I had to give. In return I had to give back more than I was taking.

A man never wants something until you tell him he cannot have it. It may not of been important at the time but now that he cannot have it , it now becomes a need.

You the female yes you , if in a committed relationship should do what ever you can to make you’re man happy within reason of course. You should care enough about his needs.Okay so you don’t like anal sex , you are talking 5 minutes of your life. You don’t like sucking cock or swallowing again 5 minutes. You keep your man happy he will not stray, but and yes but you do have those idiots.

I will never cheat again please just one more chance I am begging. Yea you can believe this just like I am so sorry I will never hit you again. Once a cheater always a cheater, the same with being Hit out of anger he will hit you again and again.

Pussy To Man is Like The Apple To Adam

 

 

 

 

 

 

Abuse Is Alive And Well

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Mentor, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, Cheaters, Cheating Dominant, Choices, communication, compatibility, consequences, Dominance Through Intimidation, exploiting your slave, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master and slave relationship, relationships, Slave, Submissive, Submissive being used with tags , , , , , , , , , , on June 4, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

MAsT:Kissimmee

 

May 19th

 

Meeting

A small group of 9 attended the 19th meeting and the topic was abuse. Even though I lead the MAsT, Masters and Slaves Together. http://www.mast.net , if you are not familiar with MAsT check out the site.

Abuse many understood how abuse can happen in a D’s or M’s relationship some were still unsure.

Girl- L  who is an awesome friend helped facilitate the meeting and she came loaded with awesome information. I myself like to let different people facilitate MAsT meetings because it make someone feel a part of. We also get different point of views which is truly needed.

The meeting is held at our home , meeting in this type of environment allows people to speak freely with out prying ears. It allows people to relax and let go where as they would not in a public setting.

We also spoke about how abuse is just not about men but there are women who abuse as well , mainly through manipulation or known better Topping from the Bottom. Most of the time this only occurs if the Dominant is not experienced or very new to the lifestyle…

Many times the abuse can be stopped prior to entering a relationship with the right education and asking the right questions. The problem today is many are to impatient and do not care about taking the proper steps. Being active in the community is a huge step forward , making friends as well. I have a handful of people I actually consider my friend. However being active does not always solve all problems because there is a dick or a bitch at every corner. The thing is it does not matter what others think about you or how you should be living your life, that is unless they are going to pay your bills..

One thing about the BDSM lifestyle is everybody is right and no one is wrong , everyone has the right answer and everyone is wrong. No one knows what they are talking about, even on Fetlife everyone is wrong. The one thing i noticed is all the people giving advice about how your life should go are single more so Doms. So yes taking advice from someone who has never been a D’s relationship is the way to go..

Abuse when it comes to the lifestyle is a huge gray area and it can be a touchy subject for some.

I know I have been approached by Doms in the community asking me if I thought I was to strict on Arianna. I suppose this is the difference between a Master and a Dominant, a Submissive and a Slave, having rules and protocols or just letting your girl run wild, and having no consequences for their actions.

I run a very smooth home, I am strict and firm, but I do so without arguing , screaming, calling names or even getting physical. I have rules in place and they are followed, I have protocols and they are followed.

I am not a 9 to 5 Dominant , I am not a weekend warrior , I am not a once every now and then Dominant , I am 24/7 and no less. I take full responsibility for not only my relationship but I admit when a mistake is made. One thing Arianna comes first and always will , I will drop what ever I am doing if needed. A Submissive or Slave should have 24/7 access to their Dominant or Master and no less, there are no excuses.

Okay ive been ranting a little and if you follow me you know by know I get off the subject at times.

One thing that really irks me is when mental abuse comes into play. When a slave or submissive is suffering from depressions, maybe being bipolar , manic and the newly found Dom does not see the signs or maybe he just does not give a fuck. Having any or all of these symptoms can put unneeded stress on someone and cause more damage.

Many times everything is in the open but many times who ever suffers from such a  disease will not be upfront about their illness. Many are ashamed but more are scared of failing a new relationship.

I myself cannot even imagine how someone who is bipolar , come close to even knowing what their thought process is, or even how one makes it through a normal day , much less how someone would handle being tied down and beaten, or used sexually. I would not even want to comprehend the thought process, or how scared or confused someone might be.

On the other hand there are some aspects of the lifestyle in which someone could benefit from a D’s or M’s home , if it was based on more of a structured setting , where rules and protocols were put in place to be beneficial. Understanding ones limits and not trying to push that explore button.  Insuring they are on medication and on the proper medication.

Just to let you know I am not talking out of my ass I am speaking from experience. I am living in such a relationship. The beginning  was a rough start but 3 years later I am and we are blessed. I suppose the setting would be different if love did not play a part , I suppose it would be different if you were just being used as a fuck toy….

The above can only be accomplished if you truly know someone and you care enough to put any effort into building a lasting relationship.

Some of the most common situations when it comes to abuse starts out with isolation. Separating you from friends and family. Making you turn over passwords to all of your accounts. Emails , social media , not allowing you to speak with other Doms, and the most severe is your banking information.

These tactics are used by Doms who are insecure or new to the lifestyle. Many have anger issues and use fear in order to obtain your submission, verbal and eventually it will turn physical.

Being new it will take some time to catch on before you will see the abuse or something pay hit you , thinking Hmmm there is something here that is not right. You feel like you have no one to turn to, after all you have turned your back on all of your friends, but even then how would you explain such a relationship?

Female abuse happens often and this is done through manipulation, and it happens with a Dom who lacks experience. However there are times when ones judgement can be blurred by letting feeling get in the way of a D’s or M’s relationship.

I have written about this subject many many times and at times I get this fuck it attitude because the truth is maybe one out of a hundred even takes notice.

The signs are clear first is isolation from friends and family , making you give all passwords to your email and social  media and email. Constantly putting you down calling you names and telling you , you area  worthless bitch. At times taking your banking information.

The fist date is either a Denny’s or a motel and your training starts off with you sucking cock. You get to see your new Dom maybe once a month if your lucky, or maybe more often to suck cock. The first date is the only date you are seen in public with him, unless your dumb enough to invite a total stranger to your house.

When you ask a question or question the way the relationship is going you get yelled at.

You the s;ave the submissive should have 24/7 access to your Dominant no questions asked. If you text you should get an answer , but most of the time it is days not minutes.

Most of the time you know something is wrong but you have it in your head he is the one, there is no one else who can fill his shoes , or should I say diapers.

You know I am not so sure it is abuse at times , I think it is more on the side of the Dom not knowing what they are doing. Many do not understand the amount of time it takes to develop a new D’s or M’s relationship, or most may not want to invest the time it takes, or some may not even consider the needs the submissive may have. Many see the relationship more as a maid service or just a sex toy but it runs much much deeper than just a piece of ass.

Ive had many new Dominants tell me they want to talk and spend time with me, and after I agree I hear nothing else from them.

There are those who are just male chauvinist pigs who see a bdsm relationship as a open door to abuse and just use and toss away until they have that need again.

After 3 years I am still finding it takes a great deal of time and communication.. I get to a point to where I have to alter things such as protocols or rules , I may have to add or take away. Both of us sit down and go over the rules to see if they still apply or maybe make some changes, maybe head in a new direction.

Only you the submissive knows what you need and you need to have a plan and know exactly what you need out of a relationship. Because a mistake made more than once is a decision , and everything falls on you if you allow yourself to continue to be unhappy or used…

What kind of Dom are you looking for ? What type of submissive are you ? Are you a slave? If so a Daddy Dom would not fit your needs. Are you a Masochist ? Then a Daddy Dom is not going to work.

You need to know who you are and what you need before you can begin your search.  Just because a Dom contacts you does not mean he is the one for you…

Last you need someone you can talk to , someone who understands you or at least tries, you need to have an outlet when something is not going well….

Again a Mistake made more than one is a decision..

There are those who crave to be used for what ever reason , those who continue to fall into the same trap, and just sit around wondering what has gone wrong or blaming others.. life is based on two things and only two choices and consequences .

Then I have to rag on the married Doms who are married and they cheat on their vanilla wives who know nothing about the other side of their husband. The wives who believe they have built the perfect home. Let me tell you something a man has what he has because of his partner , be it a vanilla wife a submissive or slave she built the kingdom.

He will talk about how bad she is and how he plans to leave her, she is a bitch and does not understand him, there is no communication , she takes no interest in his likes or hobbies. She is a total bitch.

If she was really so bad he would of left long ago. However maybe if this so called Dom had communication skills and really tried his wife who built his kingdom might be open to a little kink.

Instead he finds someone like you, who will take his bullshit , who will take his verbal abuse, and physical abuse. Someone who will take his humiliation, someone who wants to control you but he is controlling not in control. Someone who takes it up the ass because his wife will not…

Your a piece of ass and you will lose every time. You would cost him to much money if he left not to mention if there are kids involved… He is not going to leave the security he has the security his wife has built. You will do just fine until you become to needy and you will and he will dump you because you have become a liability.

While I was married to a vanilla for 9 years I never stepped out on her. I was in the lifestyle prior to meeting her but I was trying to change who I was. I wanted the house, the cars, the kids and the dog. My first month I knew I had made a bad mistake. Remember the choices and consequences ?

After 9 years I came clean about who I was and what I needed. I lost a house on the beach , two cars and a lot of money. I left with 1500 dollars in cash a canvas  bag full of clothes dirty and clean, and a beat up Yamaha 750.

My philosophy is if your not happy get the fuck out.. There is no reason to drag someone through the mud more so over something I did. I lied to her , I mislead her, I was someone I was not, and I made a fool out of her. I can say for the past 9 years I have paid child support every week and I have never missed a payment working or not..

You do not have to let someone drag you through the mud and in the end it will be your fault…

 

 

 

 

B. E. S. T. slave training.

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM and The Master, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave training, BDSM Structure, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Cheating Dominant, commitment, communication, compatibility, Daddy Doms, gullible submissive, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://fetlife.com/groups/5290, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, slave, Submission, submissive, Trainer A Slave on April 9, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

It is not often I pimp to many blogs or Web Sites but when I do it is for a good reason. To me it is kinda like recommending someone for a job , or someone asking me to be a reference for someone which I never do.

I learned a very long time ago not to stick my neck out for anyone , with the fall of a well known Gorean Master who got into a lot of trouble and did a little Prison time.
While at a munch last week I was speaking with another Dominant about him , and how he fell from grace. He was very well respected and really had it made. I believe when he got into trouble he was living with nine slaves. So for those reasons I never I mean never put myself out there like that any longer.

Our world the world we cherish because we are allowed to be who we are , we get to live our life the way we need and want to. We get to be us, we get to be real..

So here I am pimping so I guess I am back tracking a little but what I want to share about B.E.S.T. Slave Training is there is a wealth of information there. You can literately spend six months there and never read the same thing.

B.E.S.T. Slave Training also has a Fetlife group as well and is fairly active and Cuffsmaster who owns the group always takes part in the topics.

Many times it seems Dominants or Master who have been in the lifestyle for and length of time , spend way more time telling people who they are and what they have done , instead of reaching out to others , or criticizing the way other Doms live their lives and how wrong they are. There is nothing more irritating than having to listen to someone about all of their accomplishments in life. ME, ME , ME ,ME.

Most of what I blog about is about BDSM relationships , D’s and M’s but most you can even relate to Vanilla relationships as well. Because any relationship has to be about communication. Communication is the down fall of most.

Two things are needed before training begins , A Dominant who is sincere in what he wants and a Submissive or Slave who is sincere in moving forward as she is seeking freedom.

When I was in my early teens I read a book for History class. It was called Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee. It was by far the deepest book I had ever read, and when I was finished I was like What ? So I read it again , and again and still did not fully understand it.

Today when I read something I want it clear and in a language I can understand , now I am not stupid by any means , but I love to open a book and be like Bam.

B.E.S.T. Slave Training going into a lot of information , but it is written very well, easy to follow and understand , and the good thing is you can find just about any topic your interested in.

I always encourage new Dominants to perv the site because of the wealth of information. It also gives you not only a Beginning but a steady flow of information. There is no book that can tell you how to form a D’s Or M’s relationship but you can gain good information. What works for me may not work for another Dominant.

I love sharing my life here , it is more of a place for me to think and vent at the same time. I also enjoy helping other , and at times offering advice.

You read about every ones life, their new path in the D’s lifestyle , you hear the sorrow, the bitching , the complaining, fucking , sucking, and everything in between.

The Grand Daddy of it all is the submissive or Baby Girl who is seeing the so called Married Dominant. His wife knows and does not care if he see’s other people. Do you really believe this ? Are you really that naive ? Second this man or so called man is no way in any form a Dominant. This is a man who cannot even run his own home. He will see you once a week for an hour or so , maybe twice a month or even longer. He fills you will the words of love and he is going to leave his wife when the time is right. Think about it if his life was so bad he would of already left.

To you subs or Baby girls who see married men and your trying to rip a home apart because you cant find your own man, that is all good because youa re used merchandise and nothing more , I would doubt anyone else would even want you..

Now over the past two years or so , since I began my journey of blogging , I have for what ever reason opened up my life to everyone. The good , the bad and the ugly.

I have also shared my extensive training process with my slave, my property , my wife and best friend. I explained in such detail it would of been almost like you were there watching.

Many new Dominants who come to me for advice , I point them in the direction of B.E.S.T. Slave Training. Much of what I use today comes from there. Training is not something that takes place in a one week period , four weeks or three months. Training is continuous, there is not a day that goes by I do not learn something.

new Dominant coming into the lifestyle looking for a Submissive or a slave you have to have the right tools. Even when giving the right tools if you do not use them and you decide to go on your own way because now you know everything , you will crash and burn.

I have brought most of this up before , but here lately I have had several new Dominants contact me, and what I am sharing is the best tools available today. Your not going to use everything , but you will be able to put a solid plan together.

B.E.S.T. Slave Training Fetlife
https://fetlife.com/groups/5290

http://bestslavetraining.com/

This will not work

shades

How Deep Is Your Submission

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, anal sex, anticipation, Arianna, ass fucking, Bad Dominant, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, BDSM Rules, BDSM Safety, BDSM Structure, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Cheaters, cheating, Cheating Dominant, cock sucking, commitment, communication, compatibility, Consensual, consequences, control, controlling, Dominant, Dominants, FaceBook Vile Woods, Forced Submission, fucking, Humiliation, kinky, Lies, Manic, Married Dominant, Master & Slave, Security, Self Pity, slave, slave no limits, Slave no rights, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission, Training Arianna, Training your submissive with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 22, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I was sitting on the couch the other day and I was looking at Arianna. I was thinking how fast time has flown by , but what I was really thinking is how lucky I am to have found the perfect Slave , partner and wife.
I cannot say I built our home I have to say both of us built our home. It takes two to build a relationship and it takes two to work together so it can continue to grow.
So for me to sit here and say Look at what I did , would be a false statement. I may of laid down the grown work but without Arianna it would not of been possible.

I am always very cautious of those who use the words I or me on a regular basis. Most who do spend a great deal of time bragging, about what they have done or accomplished.

I am a firm believer we write our own ticket , we decide where and when we are going to go. We are responsible for our decisions, we are responsible for our right and wrongs. It is us to sets the pace in our life and what happens. Now there are times a wrench gets thrown in and we have to back up a little, but staying true in what you believe and do unto others as you would do to them, hmmm did that come out right ?

Although there are not very many people I like , I treat everyone with respect. If I don’t like you I have nothing to do with you. I am not going to get wrapped up in others drama or problems , I have my own house to take care of.

Drama will eat you up from the inside out like a cancer. Drama can destroy your home , drama can and will destroy your relationship no matter who brings it in through the door. It is not fair to bog someone else down with problems. This does mean you do not listen or help a friend in need , but there has to be a limit. Once it becomes a problem or a burden to you , then it is time to cut the rope unless you want to go down with the ship.

Submission is a beautiful thing , It puts you in a peaceful state of mind , the feeling of freedom , the freedom of being who and what you are, and you only have one to answer to. Your Dominant is the only one in your life you have to answer to, well excluding work but you know what I am talking about.

Just like meeting a New Dominant , and being asked about your limits. Well if your new to the life style you really have no idea. Being in a secure relationship with communication allows you to explore that side of you. Maybe you had limits in place, which is normal but as you grow those limits will slowly fade.

On Fetlife I love reading post when a guy says, I am looking for a bitch with no limits. What he is looking for is someone he can abuse and degrade and feel okay about it.
Early last year I was chatting with a Dominant who was mad because his slave left him because she would not fuck who ever he wanted her to. It was his right to make her lay down for who ever. The bad news is she came back , I am guessing maybe a codependent thing , maybe the feeling of being secure.
Can you really love someone if you just pass them around to just anyone ? Your going to fuck and suck who ever I say, where I say and how I say. Can that really be love?

There are those who share , there are those who explore but that is generally worked out between the couple, and there is nothing wrong with that. I myself am not the sharing type, well with a male anyway , a female would be different , but only if Arianna brought it up and she has a few times. Then you have to think about what your going to catch. It is not like it was in the 70’s when you could go get a shot.

You plant the seed , you water it , you fertilize it and it will grow. The same with your relationship. In a relationship your fertilizer is communication , and honesty. This allows the both of you to grow together..

All the kinks , the bondage , the cock sucking , the ass fucking , even to some the humiliation , the control , the submission. All of this comes as you grow , the more communication you have the more you will want to try or do, the more you will want to please the one who is in control.

In a steady long term relationship the submissive , or slave has the need to please and gets pleasure out of pleasing or know they are pleasing the one they are with.

Submission is not something you can demand , respect is not something you can demand. You will call me Sir , you will call me master. Really have you earned that much respect? I just met you why would I call you Sir? Maybe because it makes your ego swell. Maybe it fuels the Dominant inside you. Maybe you should earn that right.

Calling someone Sir or Mam is a lot different when your doing it out of respect than it is when being demanded.

I like the game , playing the game of earning someones respect , then one I am trying to form a relationship with. I like the challenge , I like the finding out how , when and where. I wait for that one word Sir. Then I know without a doubt I have been on the right track. Once you have earned that respect you have a wide open road.

When I met Arianna , I was truthful from the start about who I was and what I needed out of a relationship. I explained everything is such detail she had no questions. I am like that about anything I explain to her. Before I speak I look at every possible question that could be asked , even before Her Training started I explained everything is such detail she had no questions about anything , she just followed.

Following was her greatest down fall because she is one to trust to easy , she thinks other she had seen had her best interest in mind, just as many of you trust to easy. Under the wrong hands it can turn into a bad situation.

Rescuing and submission is not a good combination. You never as a Dominant want to be put in a situation where you are rescuing someone. Many times these are the ones who are wanting you to step in and clean up the mess they made. It is not that they cannot fix it , they just do not want to put in the time or resources it takes to fix.
Entering a relationship many do have some problems and some have problems they have no idea how to fix. If you feel you have a good chance in a long term relationship then it is okay to step in and handle a few things, just make sure your not on the Titanic with a bucket.

I told Arianna , I want you to be able to anticipate my every need. I want you to know when I need something. This was confusing to her at the start of our relationship. She asked me how am I suppose to learn all that , it seems your setting me up for failure?
Watch me and listen , that was the first 90 days of her initial training , and I can tell you the first 90 days was not a very easy task. Training is not made to be easy.
She watched and she listened and to this day she is on top of things. She is because it is a need for her. Her knowing she is pleasing me fuels her submission.

Knowing when someone needs down time is very important , knowing when someone has had enough and they just need time to let their mind go. This is something huge I believe in. Allowing Arianna down time , to see family and friends, taking her shopping. This place a huge role in supporting her.
You know at times Arianna gets somewhat Manic , that is her I accept her for who she is, but there are times you have to let the manic run its course , because slamming the breaks on something could do more harm than good, so I let out a little rope and if a mistake is made I fix it, not that there has ever been something drastic.
Knowing your partner means the world , knowing when to let a little rope out does more help than bad. Being there to pick things up , insures your partner you have their back.

Male insecurities , the two words that start almost everything argument , is what’s wrong ? These two words do more damage than anything , because it is not asked just once or twice especially is the answer is nothing. Then if the answer is nothing there has to be something wrong, so that question is just hammered until something is made up. This all comes back to the down time. Sometimes we just need to vegetate , think , let our mind go and just chill.

Who are you seeing? Are you cheating? Are you talking to anyone else? This means one or two things , the Dom you are seeing is very insecure which is not a good quality when it comes to a Dominant or he is the cheater. 99% of the time the accuser is the one who is stepping out , so then you need to ask him those same questions..

A Dominant who demands your passwords to all of your accounts that is a security problem as well as an ego problem, not to mention a lack of trust.
It cracks me up when these married fuck tards who are cheating on their wife does not trust their submissive. They cant be trusted but they cant trust the other one they are with. How fucking stupid is that? Fuck Tard was a nice word by the way.

We all choose our own path , you just need to make sure you are traveling down the right path , and you need to know your partner has your back..

Confused

Vile

The Truth About Daddy Dominants

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Structure, BDSM TPE Relationships, Cheating Dominant, Collar, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Daddy's Baby Girl, Discipline, Dominance, Dominant, Dominants, Dominants Protocol, Fake Dominants, fuck buddy, kinky, Local events, MAST, Master And Slave, Masters And Slaves Together, Rules, slave, Submission, submissive with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 9, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

First I am not speaking about every Daddy Dominant in the lifestyle , I am however speaking about 98% or higher .
Baby Girls in the lifestyle for the most are really different than those who are submissive or even a Slave. Most Baby Girls do not live with their Daddy Dominants, while I am not sure what the numbers are the percentage is very high.

Most Daddy Dominants are married and cheating , most Baby Girls do not care that they could be responsible for ripping a family apart because they are selfish. Selfish enough to try and separate the father from his children. In those cases I look down on both and I have zero respect for either.

Baby Girls first coming into the lifestyle are very vulnerable, all are really clueless when it comes to the lifestyle. Most if not all are clueless when it comes to finding a good Dominant.

So A week or so ago I was speaking with a Baby Girl who mentioned the same thing I am speaking about , how the Doms wanted a relationship but they did not want the responsibility.

So while chatting with this Baby girl she told me she had been talking to a Daddy Dom or maybe just a Dom , but when I asked if he was married she said luckily no , she too has had the same problem with married Dominants.

Again I am not speaking about all Daddy Doms , there are some good ones out there who have their baby girls best interest at heart.

You know I spent almost 7 years in a Daddy Dom role , I will also be the first to admit that was a bad turning point in my relationship but I did it because it was a need for the slave, little did I know she saw that as a weakness in me , because I was willing to change who I was.

My role was not an easy one , I set goals for her , and I made sure they were followed through with. I had rules , and protocols that were followed. Again the weakness was me changing who I was.

Once your Baby girl , submissive or slave spots a weakness they will prey on that to see how far they can push you.

While our relationship is strictly an M’s , it is based more on structure , rules and protocols. I have never left a mark on Arianna , the key word here being NEVER. One I know her limits and I respect them , two I care to much for her.

This statement is going to hit some nerves. The term Daddy Dom is somewhat new to the lifestyle. Another for the most I do not even think in a Daddy baby girl relationship the term BDSM should even be used. The main reason being many do not have rules , many do not have protocols , nor any type of structure. The final the only time a collar is put on is during play.
While at a MasT meeting sometime ago a Daddy Dom called me aside and told me I was abusing Arianna, I should not even be in the lifestyle because I did not know what I was doing. He said I was to strict, and I did not give her any freedom.
I thought for a second and I asked his what was he even doing at a MasT meeting. MasT means Masters And Slaves Together.
I have been approached by Dominants who have asked me basically the same thing. These are people who do not have a true understanding of what the dynamics of a M’s relationship is really about.
Again this is not my thoughts to all Daddys Doms within the lifestyle.
However there is a reason why you do not see many Daddy , Baby girl relationships active in the local community, who knows?

Books are an excellent reference , and you can obtain a great deal of information from books , good and bad , but you cannot live your life according to what someone else has written it will not work. We as humans have different needs , different kinks , we need different structure , and rules. Books can give you an out line but in the end your just reading someones opinion, just like my blog.

Most Daddy Doms do not collar their property, well the first meeting but after that the collar is not brought up except during play.

We need to learn to accept everyone for who they are , and what would help is maybe learning to understand our friends a lot more. The more we understand the more we grow, the more we grow , then we are open to more ideas.

I have a very dear friend Master R , him and I live total different separate lives , we both have total different views on how a M’s relationship should be ran, how a house should be ran, but we are open enough to understand we both have different needs. We also know we can depend on each other , and today in the lifestyle that is really hard.

That is why when you first meet someone being able to clearly communicate is so important, being able to understand where each other is coming from. Knowing what is expected of each other. How you see yourself in a relationship , be it Daddy Dom Baby Girl , Dominant , and Submissive or Master and Slave.

I have said this before , my way is not the only way, and just with any book , after reading some 1000 post maybe you can lay the ground work to something awesome…

Again there are a few Daddy Dominants I respect but for the most man I cant even say.

Many who call themselves Daddy Doms are married and want a piece of ass on the side. So you sit and wait and wait and wait for that call or text and then you get a couple of hours alone, then you wait another two weeks or a month and in some cases longer. You are an object and if you are happy being an object then so be it I am happy for you.

Daddy

Vile

My Wife , My Slave , My Bitch , My Property

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Safety, Cheating Dominant, commitment, communication, Consensual, owned property, owning a slave, slave, submissive with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on February 4, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I read a very interesting piece from John Brownstone this am and it really hit home. I myself fully understand where he is coming from , and why it took him so long to use certain words , and why many people who are in the lifestyle and not in the lifestyle do not understand how we as Leaders , and Dominants how we could call someone so dear to us Names.

http://southernsirsplace.com/shes-my-slut-bdsm/?fb_action_ids=1561126647477766&fb_action_types=news.publishes&fb_ref=pub-standard

I have what is called pet names , some may use Baby , sweetie , Bootsey , Baby Boo, I happen to use slut , whore , my bitch , really what ever comes to mind again these are pet names , this is under what is called open communication.

Arianna knows I mean nothing by it in a angry way, to use such names out of anger is a total different story. An angry mans words are a calm mans thoughts, just like a drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts.

You know I am not the romantic type in case you have not noticed , I try I really do , I just find it hard trying to be mushy. So I make it up in other areas. Doing things around the home, cooking on my days off , I always try and do something special. Going out as much as possible to give Arianna some breathing room, but I am just not the cuddly type and again I do try.

Looking back many years ago I saw women as objects and nothing more . It my mind it was game on and in my head I had to fuck as many women as I could. Again I was on the hunt for an object not a person , in my mind women had three pussy’s and all were there to use. I seldom dated someone more than twice unless she had above average cock sucking skills. So a long term relationship was not high on my list.

Growing older though we change , something inside of us says hey man there has to be more. Why wake up every morning alone?  The truth is you can only burn so many bridges before you run out. I have done some fucked up things in the past but one thing I always knew is NO meant NO and STOP meant STOP. Then at times silence means NO trust me you can tell. In that aspect I always respected the words and actions of NO or STOP.

John Brownstone had spoken a little about bringing another in or play in a dungeon setting , and I think such play could be okay under the right hands, as John mentioned the Dominants he knows are well versed in the lifestyle and has known them for a very long time. To add more it was not sexual which I find that to be very honorable.

I find it hard to bite or digest how a Dominant could openly share his property with another man or men. Someone you love and cherish. That mostly happens though when the two do not live together and the dude is married yea he is just a dude not a Dom or Master just a plan ol Dude.  He can share because he has no emotional ties with the submissive, she is a piece of ass and nothing more.

I loved this John spoke about respect and although there are not very many Daddy Dominants I like or even respect , without even Meeting John I have a great deal of respect for him. He is someone I could sit down with a nice Brandy someday.

Arianna you can look but you cant touch she is owned property. Since the day she was collared her collar has never been off. I have never disrespected Arianna and neither will anyone else. I have actually had other Dominants ask me if they could fuck Arianna, and all they got was a blank canvas stare.

The problem today is so many relate BDSM to just sex and kink , and nothing more . That is why so many relationships rise and fall and you people have seen that as well, subs and slaves jumping from Dom to Dom, Doms jumping from subs and slaves to others some only lasting a few days.

Back to the names , I also look at some names as a sign of ownership , my property. Some are still closed minded about the subject and that is okay we are all different.

collar

Arianna is my Property

Vile