Archive for the cock sucking Category

You Need To Strip

Posted in adapting, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave, cock sucking, Consistency, Dominant and Submissive, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Protocols, Sex and Submission, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Training Arianna, training your slave with tags , , , on February 5, 2019 by thekinkyworldofvile

Arianna walked in the house , I was sitting at the dinning table and I said stop right there.

You need to strip , take all of your clothes off. You will not be allowed any clothing unless I give permission , this includes company coming over.  I stood up and walked over to her took her hand and started walking . I stopped in front of the couch and pointed at the floor. This is where you can sit , on the floor in front of me. I then walked over to the dinning table and pointed at the floor , this is where you will eat dinner. Besides the bed those two places are the only places you are allowed to sit.

The next couple of hours I remained silent , just observing as Arianna sat on the floor wondering what I was thinking. Later in the evening I walked Arianna to the bedroom laid her down crawled on top , I came inside of her and got off and just walked away without saying a word. I was thinking to myself , my property I will use when I want.

Later that night we were talking and I explained to Arianna in 90 days you will know my needs , what I expect. She then asked how ? You will watch and listen , do what you are told when you are told and told how to do it. Arianna thought I was setting her up for failure.

The next 90 days Arianna spent a great deal of time on her back and sucking my dick. The idea behind that was to use as much as I could to let her know that is what she was for. I remember the first time Arianna sucked my dick , I was thinking this bitch is a keeper and today she just keeps getting better. The using was very important during training. The purpose was to make it clear in her mind she was here to serve and reminded her of her place in the relationship.

Remember it is the slave who must adapt to your way of living , your home , your rules , your protocols.

Over the 90 days I started introducing rules and protocols , I started to control the way she spoke , walked , sit , how she would interact with others . The protocols I introduced were important to me , this was important as well because after all Arianna would be a direct reflection of me.

I controlled the way she dressed , her nail polish , her hair style and color and at one point I shaved one side of her head.

At times I used different forms of Humiliation , this was to set the reminder who was in charge and who was not.

How do you get to know your slave ? You let them talk , talk and talk and you listen. You cannot begin to train or issue rules unless you know who you are entering a relationship with. Having open communication , your slave or submissive has the right to speak and express their feelings . You want the slave to feel comfortable enough knowing they can come to you and speak about anything and be respected and knowing you care and will not judge.

I arranged a protocol dinner where Arianna served dinner and supplied drinks and after everything was dished out , Arianna was allowed to sit at the table for the first time.

I started introducing Arianna to friends I knew in the lifestyle and we attended Munchs together.

Over the next 90 days Arianna started to become a little more comfortable but still had trust issues. We continued to communicate and we talked for several hours daily.

From the day we met is was exactly 6 weeks when Arianna moved in. We would of moved into her place but it was to small for the two of us. Arianna had a really nice small two bedroom Apartment in the historic district and I loved it but it was just to small for the two of us..

I have moved passed the need to inflict pain , my needs were more on the mental side of things. I wanted to get into Arianna’s . It took me years to realize getting into someones head was far more effective and taking the sadist side of things. Truth be known I enjoy showing Arianna off so marks and bruises would not be very appealing.

Our negotiations lasted about a day , it was not a 8 hour conversation , but we did converse on our needs , her needs , my needs and wants.

I had made up my mind I was not going to give in on any level and I was going to get my way or it would be noway.  If you are entering a relationship in the lifestyle and you give in to some of your needs , there will come a time when the need or needs will come up and you have already agreed on certain things.

When I trained I focused on my needs and wants. Sitting down and drawing a picture in my mind on how I saw my everyday life in the present and future.

Dressing , when going out I myself dress very nice and in my mind if we were going out my slave would dress like she was walking the red carpet. The slave is a direct reflection of her Master. It also shows the Master cares for his slave.

Okay this is a short blog ..

I truly appreciate everyone who stops by.

Vile

How The Lifestyle Changed My Life

Posted in abuse, Arianna, bdsm, cock sucking, Collar, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Part Time Dominant, Part Time Submission, Slave, Submission, Submissive with tags , , , , , , on February 3, 2019 by thekinkyworldofvile

Even at a very young age I was kinky , going back to 12 and 13. Then I enjoyed bondage , face fucking and anal. There is just something about a nice ass that rocks my world , more so being in a nice ass.

In my late teens while stationed in Korea , my first look into a dark world I did not understand but I knew I had a connection.  Leaving Korea going stateside for a very short time then heading to Germany where I met Gretchen. Gretchen was up for anything and for two years it was like a 9 1/2 weeks. You would think after spending almost two years with someone love would of come up but neither of us used that word nor did it ever come to mind.

Heading back to the states I was even more curious , curious about something but I could not pin point it I just needed more of it. Most of the time if I went on a date it was a one time thing because if I got into her pants the real me came out.

Fast forward to the early 90’s and I met another Dom name Animel , the meeting him was just by chance and passing. While I lived in Daytona I would drive a cab part time during events. On any giving event I could make 3 or 4 thousand dollars. While sitting waiting on a call this old man pulled up next to me and struck up a conversation. It did not take long to figure out we had a lot in common and I knew he had a lot of wisdom to share. In a very short time we were like best friends and I found myself at his place just about every day. I would spend hours just listening to him about his life , relationships and why they failed..

At this time I had one thing on my mind and that was pussy. Back then yahoo was the best search engine when it came to finding someone. You could search other users right down to the city. Your search could include , submissive , slave , hair color everything. Then you pulled up their profile and off went a message.

Most Dominants place the blame on the submissive when a relationship fails , I find this hard to believe , because in my experience if the relationship fails it falls directly on the Dominant.  One lying about who he was , two not willing to put any effort into the relationship and last not staying consistent.

I met Bee on yahoo how fucking awesome and our relationship lasted for almost 7 years and when we split yes it was my fault. After Bee I jumped from bitch to bitch , most ending in less than a week. Those that lasted longer than a week was only because I wanted the companionship. As humans we tend to settle for less just for the sake of having companionship. I met Bee about 3 months before my divorce , the entire 7 years I was married and miserable I might add , I remained loyal. I remained loyal because while most might disagree I had some morals. The marriage was a mistake and I had to own it.  Prior to getting married I was in a long term relationship with a little Korean who danced for a living. This was a relationship that lasted 7 years or so and she ended up moving back home due to her parents health.

Being a Dominant is not a part time job , nor can you train a submissive or slave on a part time basis. So ask a Dominant or most how they train ? Ask a Dominant about his protocols and you get a blank stare. The training question never gives you a answer or a answer I got from a Dominant last year when he stated he was training a new submissive , of okay what is your training techniques ? The answer he was was uh you know the usual. Yes really that was the answer.

You as the Dominant you have to sit down and figure out not only who you are but what you want out of a relationship. Again a part time Dominant only gets part time submission and nothing more and if you expect more you are just living a fantasy and nothing more.

To train someone you have to have a clear understanding of what it is you want out of life. How do you picture your life? What type of submissive or slave are you looking for ? What amount of control do you want in your relationship?

If you are already in a relationship or even married the partner you are with can be trained , and can be trained and in most cases not even know it. It is much easier to talk you your spouse than to look elsewhere , unless you are upfront about your plans.

Back in the day I was pretty wild , heavy into pills , I smoked more pot than I can remember . Germany was good , I smoked Hash and a lot of beer , I love beer.

After I exited out of the Army and I lost my first two jobs I knew I had to do something and I just quiet everything cold turkey.

The lifestyle I knew I was different but I could not pin point what I was feeling or the way I was thinking. I knew I was different and I also knew if I wanted to find a partner I needed someone like me. It did not take me long to be able to recognize those who were submissive , but I was not looking for anything long term , just someone for the weekends.

Years go by and I began to feel like I was missing something and that was someone to come home to. I lived with several knowing all would be short term but I had company and I was able to get my kink on. I have never allowed clothing to be worn inside the home and getting dressed when company came over it depended on who it was.

At one point in life I tried to change , I truly thought I was missing out on something so I walked away from the lifestyle and married Vanilla. I wanted the house , the dog and kid but little did I know I would spend the next 9 years being miserable. I have made a few mistakes but this would be a mistake I would pay for 18 years.

I was married for 9 miserable years , and I paid for it and in the end I walked away with a son who was barely 8 years old. I left a house and a shit load of money. During my marriage while being unhappy I remained loyal. I did not step outside of our marriage because when I married her I made an agreement.  I am a man of Morals and integrity , if I give you my word you can take it to the bank.

My life has changed over the years and for the good. It is a different feeling when you own someone instead of just the thought of being married. In my head the responsibility is much greater. You not only own , your decisions affect someone more because your slave looks not only up to you, but follows you through good and bad. We as Masters making the setting. I tend to think things out more logically , thinking of the consequences as well as the good and bad.

You have a slave who depends on you to make the right decisions , you own a slave who has the thinking you have their best interest in mind. Our fuck ups can have a rolling effect , mentally and if you continue to fuck up there will surely be a loss of respect.

We as Masters cannot continue to make mistakes and expect to be looked up to , or even expect someone to follow our rules.

Our slave must be our main focus , our slave must come first even before family and friends.

Today my life is perfect ,  and many when I explain just how my life is I just get a blank stare as if my story is unbelievable.

I want for nothing including sex , sex is always on my terms. Sometimes I tend to get relaxed and I start taking advantage of the girls and tend to take more than I am giving back. When I speak of giving back that would be communication and just listening. Arianna gives me a little reminder and I get back on track.

The lifestyle has made me more responsible for my actions ,  I think things through before action. I never put more on my plate than I can handle.. In my relationship Arianna come first even before family , Lynn comes first as well. I think that is a huge mistake Doms make not putting their property first…

I have grown calmer over the years and I came to realize there is nothing really to get angry over. Why would you yell of abuse someone who lays on their back or sucks your dick? I learned long ago to think before I speak , it gives me time to process my thoughts and words.

You want the world but you are not willing to put any effort into making the relationship work. BDSM is so much more than having someone suck your dick , then you get angry when things do not go your way. You make unrealistic demands , demands you would not do.

Your Property comes first no matter what , before friends , before family and if you are married and seeing someone the man up and leave because you cannot give 100%. You as the Dominant cannot expect full time submission being a part time Dom it does not work and in the end you will lose.

We as humans tend to settle for less than what we really need , this is called pussylitice , your dick is your brain , depending on your Testosterone depends on how Dominant you are.

You can have the life you want but you are going to have to work for it.

 

 

 

 

Submission Is A Mindset

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Relationships, Bestslavetraining.com, cock sucking, communication, FaceBook Vile Woods, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive with tags , , , on September 15, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Wow we just recovered from a category 3 Hurricane , what a mess. I slept through most of it , Arianna on the bed looking out of the window with a flash light, only waking me when we lost power so we could set everything up for our salt water aquarium. Lynn was away taking care of a dear friend. The good thing is we now have power back but I did miss a few days of work. Arianna had a rough couple of days a work helping to get everything back in working order, she sent me a screen shot of her health app and by days in had walked over 21.000 steps or roughly 7 miles. Our house has gas so we were able to cook and yes I had fucking coffee. As soon as the winds died down I busted out my grill.. Ahhhh my 1977 Grand Prix was locked away in the garage , but my insurance company had already contacted me before the storm, how fucking awesome is that?

Now to the story

 

There is no one definition when it comes to the word submission , or even a Slave. It does not matter who or what you are you will not find the same pair of shoes or the same size..

Every Dominant is different , every Master is different so there is no comparison, same thing with the shoes all are different and no two pair are the same.

Defining your Submission can only be done by you , you know who and what you are. Even if your exploring you still have a good idea.

Training most in the BDSM community do not take that word very seriously  it may come up but will quickly pass or something may start but then fad very fast, but you the submissive are caught up in the heat of the moment and probably will not even notice.

Mo

The same with a Dominant or a Master we know who we are , we are the one who defines who we are and what type of relationship we are looking for. I spent years looking for that perfect shoe size.

When my relationships did not work in the past I put the blame on the submissive. She was not really a submissive , she was fake , she was to dumb to follow direction. That was was so far from the truth , it was my fault , I was focused more on the sex side of things and the physical play and not the control.

Asking the right questions when meeting a new sub or slave, showing a true interest in what is said.  We hear but do we listen ? Do we process the information that is giving ? Are we taking mental notes ? If you are considering the submissive as a potential partner are you coming up with a game plan as words are spoken?

Getting in ones head , processing their thoughts , figuring out how and why the sub or Slave thinks the way they do. If you do not know someone you cannot train someone.

Ask yourself this question does your dominant know your favorite color? Does he know what type of music you like, movies, food , your birthday? Does he know your brothers name , your sisters or parents names?

The mindset , your mind not your heart needs to want to give up control. I am not speaking of all because there are actually very few in our lifestyle who want to live a D’s Or M’s lifestyle , most again is just kink related , dom and sub while in the bedroom. Once your mind is in place and you have connected with the right one your heart will follow allowing your submission to grow.

Been around for more than a decade one of the best sites for information to date is http://bestslavetraining.com . There are books , there are articles that are written but what you are looking for is a guide , a guide that will lead you in the right direction. Books are and can be good but you are reading what has worked for someone else. This would not be the case for you. What works for me will not work for you.. However you can take ideas and experiment and maybe implement some things..

Capture the mind , you can rule the world , her world , your world. Capture the mind you capture the whole state of her submission. Capture the mind , and you capture the body and mind. Capture the mind and you capture the respect. Capture the mind and she will follow as you lead.

Knowing your limits , knowing where you stand when it comes to play and your body. Negotiations are very important when entering a relationship. This is not something that should take place in one setting. Mean what you say and say what you mean and stick to it.

Saying the word NO for some is very hard but it is a must at times. Even when it comes to friends. Friends will reach out to someone who cannot say the word NO more so than others and many times you get nothing in return. If you do not agree with something then say NO. You do not submit until both have to to some kind of agreement.

Put your limits on the table including the ones your not sure of and the ones you are willing to explore. Be smart but most of all be safe , think smart and logical , keeping your head clear with make you able to make the right decisions.

Your submission is a mindset , your feelings , your needs , you as a whole a mindset.

You and only you know what your needs are , you and only you control your own destiny.

I want to thank each and everyone of you who stop by. If there is a topic you would like for me to touch on just let me know…

Much Love

Vile

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, blow job, cock sucking, codependency, codependent, commitment, communication, consequences, Dominant and Submissive, Ego, Face Fucking, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, Kink, Low Self Esteem, masochist, Master And Slave, Online Dominants, owned property, Owned Slave, Poly Triad, Private Protocol, Punishment, self confidence, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission with tags , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sitting here listening to Bret Michael’s jamming with friends , and it fucking rocks. Music is a passion of mine , it is my release , it is my time to chill , gather my thoughts , enjoy my own little world.  Ted Nugent , KISS , Aerosmith , and some country at the top of my list Kid Rock. I love the cheesy kung fu movies that comes on Thursday nights. I am a huge news fanatic so if there is something you want to know just ask.

I am very laid back for the most , I have never raised my voice or lost my temper towards my property. This is not to say I am a push over because I am not , I speak my mind no matter where I am or who I am with.

I am a Buddhist , I have learned to channel my anger but as with any man or human there is a limit. At one time I had a very bad temper , I drank a lot , you could hand me a bunch of pills  and I would not even ask what they were I would just take them. I tried to smoke all the pot in the world but I failed. I would smoke and someone would just grow more. I was on a down hill spiral with not a care about tomorrow or the future.

A Dom who has a temper is not a Dom he is a abuser and nothing more. A man who hits a woman out of anger is a pussy because he will not hit anyone who will not fight back. A Dom who will not allow you to ask questions and want answers is not a Dom. A Dom who does not allow open communication is not a Dom…

However that road of destruction ended around November 1986. October and November I lost my first two jobs after my exit from the US Army. I went cold turkey I stopped everything at one time not looking back… I thought for sure I would of had some type of withdraws but that was not the case, however I did lose most of my friends or I assumed they were friends…

At this time I was living in a small town called canton Ga. It had changed a lot being gone for ten years. Most of the people I knew had moved or changed so much we no longer had anything in common…

My Dominance is a gift and I mean that. A gift means I am taking time out of my life and offering a gift. My gift I am setting my time and life to the side and offering you security , I am offering a sanctuary of peace no drama , no arguing . I am offering you respect , I am offering you me. I am offering you a open door 24/7 , I am offering you communication 24/7. I am offering you stability , I am offering you protection. I will allow you to grow and I will conform to your needs. I will take the time out of my life to train you to fit my needs. I will not take advantage of you , I will not mislead you , I will admit my mistakes. I will offer more than I take but most of all I will always put you first.

Wow! looking over the list and it could of continued I am sure with enough thought. I just wanted to crack the door open and let people take a peak inside.

Both dominance and submission is a gift both have much to offer and prove. I am of course speaking of the beginning steps in a new relationship.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.

I am at a later date going to speak about our triad , we now live as three and while there could be some improvement things are really going well. My time training is limited due to my work but Arianna has stepped up to the plate and is offering guidance .

The Slave has a different mindset than a submissive. A submissive can and has the right to say NO. The submissive can impose limits on the relationship. The submissive can have the choice of when and when not to submit.

The word Slave , the word ownership , the word property. We all know owning a slave is not in any way legal but it is a mindset. The slave kneels holds her hands out and says I am yours to take and use.

You have to want it , you have to need and crave, it has to be in your blood. You have to live, dream and walk with this deep need and desire.

Arianna is a very unique Slave , during her training there was no rejection , there was no resistance, I could see in her eyes she had a hunger. To this day she continues to seek ways to submit more to give more. Everyday I grow with her everyday my respect grows. As my needs change Arianna conforms , but as she changes I conform to meet her needs.

Giving yourself without a thought having that feeling of being completely owned. Willing to be trained to fit someones needs and wants. Being used as a sexual object at the drop of a hat. You can be loved but in the end you are owned property.

Now I sit looking back over the years and thinking about the transformation , thinking about the growth. Watching someones habits change, watching needs change. More than willing to follow rules , protocols and understand there are consequences for her actions. To this day Arianna continues to search and find ways to submit more , she has that need, it is something she craves.

You the Slave must be in the right frame of mind and have a understanding what is about to take place. You must be willing to have over your mind and body and be willing to hand over complete control without question.

Are you Domestic more service orientated ? Are you just going to be used sexually ? Are you a Masochist used for pain? Or are you a mixture of all rolled into one?

You also must be giving a clear understanding what is expected of you , what your training will consist of , how long your training will be. You will want to know what the final goal is.

Trust is the main factor in building a Master / Slave relationship. The slave knowing once she or he agrees to the terms negotiated during the process.

You have to know most of your rights will be stripped away from you. You must know you and your body will be used , without warning. You will be taken when and how your Master chooses.

However and there is a however , you should still be allowed to see friends and family , a slave needs what I call down time. A time to relax and breath , to be able to clear the mind. A time to reflect on past and future.

We as Masters and Dominants take and we must give back more than we take. Probably two or three times a week I tell both Arianna and L that I really appreciate everything they both do. At time I do help out as well. On my days off I cook and at times I even jump in and do a few dishes.

A Slave is not your maid although the slave will be giving chores to do , A slave is not your mom. I pickup behind myself. If I use something I put it back. I do not demand dinner be done at a certain time, both know when I take lunch , If I am going to be late they eat before me.

Many just sit back and look for reasons to punish and my question is why? We can just sit back and find something wrong and the first thing that most grab is a belt or paddle.

Although I run a strict house punishing is something I do not look forward to, just as a parent feels bad for punishing a child.

We as humans , Masters and Dominants make mistakes maybe not on a daily basis but we do. Slaves and submissive’s make mistakes as well but nothing more could be more devastating known they have failed.

As with the 7 types of Submissives there are just as many slaves , but also there are just as many Dominants or Masters..

The service slave is more geared towards service , cleaning , cooking , and keeping things in order. Although sex does play a part service is their main goal. Just knowing their Master is pleased gives them pleasure.

The sex slave can be a little service orientated but is geared more at being used as a sex object , at times no holes barred. The sex slave gets off more knowing they have pleased than them getting off. Most sex slaves will conform to what pleases the Master and urge those actions more.

The Masochist in most cases is neither just as a full blown sadist. Very little structure , very few rules, it is all about the pain and the pleasure the sadist gets out of inflicting pain.

The all around slave a mixture of all of the above , a slave that needs a little of all , being used , in service and at times stepping up to take what pain is giving..

We as Master need to step up to the plate , owning one of the above takes a great deal of time and responsibility. We must make ourselves available 24/7. Arianna knows she can wake me at any time to talk.. We must give more than we take.

Being codependent does not make you broken , being needy does not make you broken , having a low self esteem does not make you broken in fact many times it makes you special.

I have heard many times I am broken or I am not worthy of having a Dominant or Master.

I myself prefer the needy part even the codependent , it is just knowing how to handle and being able to offer the care. Short term neither play out good if both sides are not ready to commit.

I have found very few Dominants or those who call themselves Masters who are truly willing to take any type of relationship serious or willing to take the responsibility needed.  These are the guys who hide behind the computer , the trolls who really have no clue. Once they find someone who is gullible enough it is short lived . The crazy rules the unrealistic demands , the confusion of changing rules just so they can punish.

Training is very time consuming just the initial training I am going to say 90 days with hands on contact on a daily basis. In order to be in control you have to be able to reach out and touch. Online training does not work , it works as long as the computer is on and you have 24/7 contact then it is still iffy.

You have to have need , the craving to be owned , the craving to be used , the craving to be called property. The craving to be able to hand yourself over completely.

The hardest part is the first 90 days it will tell you number one if you are just going through a frenzy or the life of a slave is not you….. It is easy to throw in the towel and give up , it takes a lot to stick it out , but if things are not what they seem , the raise the white flag and say I am done… No shame your just being true. I can assure you the Dominant you leave is not the last in the world.

I believe at times humiliation is needed , it is needed to bring someone back down to reality. It is meant to give a shock , kinda like sticker shock when looking at a new car. It brings someone ego back down to earth. Even during my relationship there are times I will use some form of humiliation to keep things in check , it puts them or reminds the slave of their place..

The word USE I use my property , I use my property for my pleasure , even during fucking I use the word USE , I love using you , I love fucking my property , I love fucking your ass. I like the little reminders..

We live a micromanaged relationship as most of you know. I control everything. I control hair color , I control the length , the nail polish , her clothes . I control the way she walks , talks. I control how she acts in public. I control bathroom , food , bedtime , shower , shaving. I receive a hourly check in 90% of the time with pictures. Both girls have a mileage book although I do not check it on a regular basis it is there if I have the urge to look. I have no passwords , I see no need mainly because I am secure enough in my relationship. However I will at times pick up the phones and strum through them.  If you as a Dominant has the need to demand passwords you do not trust and you have a very low self esteem.

If you the Dominant are insecure how can you control someone and your ego not be behind the force of your relationship? A relationship based on insecurities and ego will be short lived and you brought it on yourself, but you will sit in a corner and cry like a little bitch. Even in a relationship when things don’t go your way you still act like a little bitch.

You cannot be a part time Master , you have to be a Master 24/7 365

If you noticed I did not speak to much about Kink , or Bondage. My relationship runs much deeper. While at times I enjoy getting rough , at times I enjoy bondage , at times I get off on sexual abuse , face fucking being my favorite, then anal. I am more about the control , I love being in the mind. I love the structure . I have a life with zero problems and zero drama.. I love my life

New Dominants your best source for information http://bestslavetraining.com/

Oh My Ride

 

Grow up and be a man…

 

 

Rules And Training

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Structure, BDSM TPE Relationships, cock sucking, codependent, Collar, communication, compatibility, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, MAST, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Protocols, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Submissive being used, training your slave on January 17, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

I get emails from Submissive’s and Slaves asking me questions about training and rules. Meeting Doms for the first time.

You meet on a dating site you send messages back and forth and the Dom hounds you for your phone number until you give in.

The first questions are how long have you been in the lifestyle, you state you are new to the lifestyle but you want to learn. BOOM first mistake you are hooked. You start texting back and forth hes not really asking questions about you he is more interested in what you’re limits are , are you bi sexual ? Do you swallow ? Do you do anal ? What is the shortest skirt you own ? Do you ever go without panties ? How often do you masturbate ?

So after being hounded you agree to meet because you are tired of the pressure. The place is classy probably a Denny’s in the corner . He has instructed you to wear a short skirt with no panties. You have second thoughts but agree after all you want to make a good impression. You are instructed certain time to text because the Dom is busy with work and works really crazy hours and when you do text most of the time it takes several hours to get a response or even a day or so.

When you meet the Dom still knows very little about you or you’re family and friends , what you enjoy doing in you’re spare time, music or food , just the kink side of things.

You are instructed not to make eye contact and you are told to address him as Sir. He does most of the talking mainly because you are afraid to ask any questions even though some of it does not sound right.

He spends a great deal of time just talking about himself , and bragging about everything he has done and ask very few questions about you.

Most likely hew ill pull out a collar he bought at Walmart or petco and throws it at you and you are now owned..

Now you’re training starts you walk out and get his car he unzips his pants and you are instructed to suck his cock. Keep in mind you have no clue who this dude really is, you have no clue where he lives because you do not have his address, you don’t even know where he works, and you are about to suck his dick.

You know in you’re mind this cannot possibly be right because you are seeking more but you will blow him just to please. These are guys who do not have a clue nor do they care about you or the out come.

The most difficult about training is being able to sit down and out a plan together. What worked with the last relationship will not work on the next. Every Slave or Submissive has a different personality , they have different needs and the out come of the training will be different.

You’re questions , why do you want to train me ? What is the end goal you have in mind ? What am I going to get out of you’re training ? What are you going to get out of training me ? Now this next question will stump a Dom who has no clue. What are you’re protocols public and private ? What type of structure will you provide? Do you have any Ex issues ? That is a huge biggie many Ex’s still have a hold on his belt. Am I going to come first ? Will I have 24/7 access to you ?

A few of the first questions a Dom will ask before even knowing you’re favorite color is are you Bi ? Are you poly ? Do you mind if I see other women ? What are you’re limits ? That is usually the first or second question believe it or not. Do you swallow ? Yes a lot of women do not. Do you like Anal sex? Everything is about sex and nothing about you.

To train you is to know you , You say you are a Slave but maybe you are not sure so there are questions that has to be asked and you have to be completely honest.

To train you is to know you , how you think , what makes you think the way you do, you’re habits , the likes , the dislikes what areas if any need improvement.

This should be you’re train of thought , although I have needs not wants but needs , my main purpose is to serve and please. The train of thought should be if my Dom is happy I am happy. Second you have to be sure you are getting the whole package.

There was a conversation about training but you enter the relationship and nothing changes. The only thing that has changed is he is barking out orders and he likes to beat you.  This is where communication comes in you should and have the right to ask questions, you have the right to get answers. If you ask a question and you get yelled and it happens on a regular basis then maybe you need to rethink you’re situation. Never I mean never let feelings get in the way of happiness that will fuck you up every time.

You have to be truthful from the start , if you tell the Dom you love being fucked up the ass and when it comes time and you freak out it will not be good. Honest you have to be honest and not honest just to please.

The Dominant has to be honest , once rules are giving out they are set in stone. Down the road a Dom may revisit the rules and maybe there is one he feels you  do not need any longer. Once rules are in place a Dominant will not change just because he wants to punish you. The truth is a Submissive or Slave will strive to be the best they can be. Mistakes do happen I know this and so do other Dominants.  If a Dominant has enough protocols in place very few rules are needed if any. Protocols are the driving force of structure.

When you first meet a Dominant you meet on you’re terms and you’re terms only , you can even go as far as picking the place somewhere on public. You pick what you are going to wear and how you will address him. Many will demand that you call them Sir. That right is earned after you have full respect for them and not until. Submission is earned not giving. Most Doms who have no clue will try to give you a collar. This shows the fuck is a total idiot and nothing more. The collar is picked up from a pet store or walmart and is just tossed across the table and you are told to put it on, you are now owned lets start you’re training.

I have had failed relationships some I did not care about others I lost sight of direction, or I was stumped and had no idea which way to go. I knew what I wanted and needed but had no idea how to get there. I could picture the type of relationship I wanted but was stuck in first gear. Most relationships at that time were just a matter of convenience. I had pussy on a daily basis and someone to suck my cock. I knew going in it would not last and would only be around until I got bored or she got to clingy.

A dominant is not born over night , it is not something you just wake up one morning and say hey I want a submissive. There is growth , the wisdom, learning to control the anger , and finding ways to divert the anger to funnel it out of your system. Learning words are far worse than being physical. Bruises go away words do not, not that I condone being physical no man should ever hit a woman out of anger.

Observation , asking questions , thousands of questions , Observing , learning , communication , learning how the submissive thinks learning what they think the way they do. Learning their habits , their needs, their wants. Tv , music, hobbies, reading the submissive like a book. Once you have that down you can begin their training. Training that will be effective , training that will benefit both.

You Guys , you Dominants , Masters you can have anything you want , you can have anything you need, you can have anything you have ever dreamed of, it just takes a little effort on your behalf. You have to be willing to put as much time into building the relationship as you want out of it. One thing you cannot take more than you give, if you do it will never work..

Good Info. http://bestslavetraining.com/

 

 

As A Dominant

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Behavior Modification, cock sucking, Consistency, Depression, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominant and Submissive, fucking, Manipulation, Master and slave relationship, Slave, Submission, submissive, viledesires62@aol.com on June 18, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

It is our responsibility to pick those up who have stumbled, those who are having a hard time coping , Those who are having a stressful position on life , those who are confused and feel they have no one to turn to.

Something that irks me , is to be at a public outing and the big bad Dom sits back and tells about his times and travels , what he has done, what he knows and the mile long experience he has, but when a submissive needs a helping hand they just turn their back and walk away.

You want the pussy but you do not want the responsibility , you want your dick sucked but you do not want the responsibility, you want to tie their ass up and beat them but you do not want the responsibility.

This does not pertain to all of course there are those who just enjoy fucking , but there are the few who are different , there are the few who suffer from depression. When you play with someone who has some sort of mental issue , you are doing nothing less that manipulating  them, your playing head games and once your front door closes your done your finished.

I was talking to someone the other day and he wanted to know hot to train someone , so in answering that each is different but I gave a few ideas and he stopped me midway and said it was to much work.  I explained that it could be a little work in the beginning but within 60 to 90 days everything would start to fall into place.

Training is no joke , as a matter of fact it is something close to rehabilitation , you are changing someones thought process, changing habits, the way someone dresses , talks and walks, of course this is a M’s relationship and at times it very well could be a D’s. Once everything is in place it is just daily maintenance , not weekly or bi-weekly it is daily.

You want the perfect relationship but your not willing to put the effort into building something that could be the most intense relationship you have ever had..

Karma is a bitch and it will bite you in your ass. Think twice before you ruin someones life. Unless your in for the long run leave the ones who are vulnerable   and need that guiding hand alone, unless your going to answer your phone at 3 am.

Playing with those who have emotional problems or suffer from depression does not make you a Dominant , it shows you are weak and you have no values, and if you think for one minute that you are not being talked about you are dead wrong..

So next time your sitting at at table at a munch and you introduce yourself as Master Dick , take a look around the room.

Vile

BDSM Relationships Move So Fast

Posted in Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM Abuse, BDSM Relationships, cock sucking, communication, control, controlling, Dominance, Dominant, Humiliation, Master, Meeting a new Dominant, Passwords, Slave, Submissive, sucking dick, Total Solitude, Verbal abuse, viledesires62@aol.com on March 6, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Your traditional dating is pretty simple, you meet , talk go out spend time with each other. You go out to eat the movies , parks, kissing making out a little foreplay. You know this things tend to move slowly , both of you are on your best behavior trying to convince each other your the perfect fit.. If it works out it does if it does not oh well.

Then we cross the tracks , the other side of the world a new world unknown to most, something with a dark side , but in a way it is exciting.

Your train of thought changes as a female , you have not yet figured out where you fit in, all you know is what you have read really gets you going.

Now all train of thought is no longer rational , your not thinking clear, your brain is moving at Mach one and as of this moment what you have read , what you have chatted about in chat rooms, and maybe some small talk with women at work or maybe your to ashamed to bring it up.

Your Hormones have just kicked into high gear, all of a sudden you need BDSM in your life this is what you have been missing in your life…

You meet a Dom or Master in a chat room , maybe a Daddy Dom. You now let a complete stranger dictate who and what you are and the way words are put you may not fully understand but you go along with what your being told. He gives little hints using key words you pick up on.

Unlike the traditional dating 20 minutes into the chat , your asked what your limits are ? Limits what the fuck is that? Ahhhh your not sure so he begins to explain feeding you more. The next question is are you Bi ? That is always the first question, the second is do you swallow, do you take it up the ass? Do you enjoy pain? Do you enjoy humiliation ? What is the shortest skirt you own ? What are the shortest shorts you own? Do you go out in public without a Bra? How often do you Masturbate ?

If your not lock then comes the webcam , or kik then talking on the phone leading up to phone sex.

Here is what really gets me is the self punishment , making you punish yourself, spanking your pussy , putting clothes pins on your nipple and clit. Then the name calling starts and you go along with it because you do not know any better. The isolation kicks in keeping you away from friends and family. Your passwords and in most cases your banking information. I have seen a few get completely wiped out, and left with nothing.

If your local and you meet you are to wear a skirt or dress with no panties which I have never figured out. Once you meet about twenty minutes into the conversation he wants to start your training, you either get a room or if your dumb enough you take a complete stranger back to your home.

Then the cock sucking training begins , he blows his load down your throat pats you on your head and tells you to wait on his text..

All of the above happens in a matter of days not weeks or months, days and at times a day.

You are experiencing mass confusion your mind is stuck in neutral and you feel you have no where to turn. On the other hand you are taking the word of one person, then one who claims he can lead you down the right path, the one word you hear is Trust, trust me.

Your going to make mistakes , your going to make more than one , more than two or three and you will continue until you get your head straight.

Everything becomes a chore nothing is now fun, you dread seeing your Dom but at that moment and time he is the only one in your life.

All of the above has to do with your Hormones , and nothing more until your able to take a grasp on things.

The process is not as bad as you think it is, thinking through things is the difficult part..

Vile