Your a submissive or a slave maybe a late bloomer. Who do you talk to? When you first make the discovery , you start to read, you look for as much information as you can. Are your thoughts a fantasy or do you truly desire the D’s way of life? Who can you turn to?
Chat rooms are polluted way to much drama. Mostly internet Doms or those who want to be a Dom, living out the ultimate Fantasy. The on your knees bitch Dom, demanding to be called Sir or Master. I suppose there are some who would follow such an idiot, those who do not have a clue.
On the other hand being in the closet chat rooms are about the only way to go, until you realize there has to be more to the lifestyle than sending pics and phone sex. Just so the Dom can get off over the phone while your spanking your pussy.
Those who have been in the lifestyle for any time are still in the closet. Maybe fear of losing their job, worried about what others will think. Maybe worried about being judged, what family will think.
I do not hide who or what I am, you either except me, or you don’t. Those who criticize really do not have a clue. You think BDSM , you look at the pictures on the net, and the first thing that comes to mind is abuse. Getting pass the pictures is the hard part.
Okay so 99% of the pictures when you click on images after you have searched BDSM are models, clips from movies. Why would you post a picture of two eating dinner, walking on the beach, or two people shopping? That would not be very interesting now would it.
Most people and it is the one who do not have a clue, are so close minded and set in their ways even if the two of you set someone down and tried to explain your life, they still have the images in their mind.
So now the Gays and Lesbians have come out of the closet, even famous people who have said they are bi-sexual have come out of the closet. Sports figures who are gay have come out of the closet, singers, actors, and actresses have come out of the closet.
Okay so now us the Dominant who needs to be in control, the submissive who needs to be controlled. We for the most live in a dark closet in fear of what others will think.
What about the Gay Dom, most probably know he is gay, but it is the other he hides from people. It is okay to be Gay but there is still a fear if someone finds out about his lifestyle.
The lifestyle is not something we admit openly in public, it is not something we brag about, but here is the truth a submissive or slave most of the time will not wear their collar to work or while out with friends in fear of being judged. Family members do not know of your lifestyle friends do not know, it is a deep dark secret.
So we find the one partner we can fully communicate with share things with, but your still in the closet. I have invited people to munchs so they can see first hand what the lifestyle is about, they still cannot get passed those fucking images. Even those in the lifestyle are afraid to go in fear of someone seeing them. Kinda like the married guy going to a Titty Bar and parking his car out back in fear of someone seeing him.
Okay so our lifestyle is no ones business, and I fully agree, it is not something I blab on a daily basis, but it is not something I hide either.
The world as a whole is very close minded. Way to many tree huggers who think they know how everyone should be living their life, they have all the correct answers.
You should not watch rated XXX movies, or you should not be drinking, please don’t go into that nude bar and corrupt your mind. You do not have to be in control, you have no right controlling your Gf or your wife. It is not right to tie her up, and spank her. How can you abuse her like that.The question never comes up. Does she like it ? Are these the things she wants ? Are these her kinks or needs ?
So lets say my partner was into all these kinks and I was not, but I went along with her needs, but if I did not understand what am I suppose to do up and leave. Sorry I cant do this I am gone.
I am not saying you should blab your private life, but never be ashamed of who or what you are. Our personal life is just that. Many who are owned are ashamed to wear their collar out in public in fear of being questioned. I would never expect someone to wear a leather spiked collar to work, I would hope your Dom would spend more than twenty bucks on a collar anyway.
Be who you are and stand proud.