Archive for the Dominant and Submissive Category

Obtaining Deeper Submission

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, codependent, Consistency, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Training your submissive with tags , , , , on December 12, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Deeper submission is something wanted by both the Dominant and the Submissive , however many times the submissive will want but is clueless about how to achieve such a goal. This falls onto the Dominants shoulders in guiding the submissive.

While trust is a huge factor there has to be some guidance , in assisting the submissive reach their goals.

Training is huge , it will be the main factor in not only the Dominants goals but the submissive’s as well.  I have said this before having a plan before you begin training is a valuable asset , having goals , setting rules and protocols. I have found it to be difficult to implement any rules until you truly know someone. You can add rules or take rules away but to alter a rule can had adverse effects. Rules are to enhance the submissive or slaves life. While protocols are meant to enhance the control of the Master or you could say protocols are rituals. The last sentence were words from my slave Arianna.

I myself begin training and continue without my slave knowing , I am going to try and explain some different methods but training will vary from submissive to submissive or slave to slave. Each personality is different , needs are different and habits are different.

I was speaking with another Dom yesterday and I was explaining he had to be able to define himself and know what he wanted in a submissive and what his final goals would be. It sounds pretty simple yes? Well truth be known it is not simple and it is a lot of work and it is work that is continued for the long term. I was chatting with a Gorean Master who takes in part time slaves for a weekend , a week , a month , 6 months and so on but nothing is set for long term. My time is more valuable than that but I also realize we are both on different playing fields. I do however use some of the Gorean rituals and protocols.

First your potential partner must be real and serious, by this time you should of seen if it is what I call sub frenzy , or just a fantasy because once someone steps into your world it is game over.

When you the Master explains something it should be in such great detail , when you are finished there are no questions , but you will ask if there are any questions , this is done each time.

What is wrong ? That question is so lame it has no meaning and should be dropped from your vocabulary. Instead try this, What is on your mind? Boom the first question puts up a defensive wall , guarded not letting you in. What is on your mind? What are you thinking? If there is anything the words will flow like a water fall I promise you, this will make life show much easier.

A Dominant or Master should never lose your temper when it comes to your property. Anger shows a lack of control , if you cannot control your anger how can you control someone else?  You must be respected before you can expect someone to submit. Five years I have never raised my voice towards my slave or my submissive 5 fucking years. Why? My slave Arianna is in service to me as with Lynn , both serve me , both take care of my needs. Both respect me and both depend on me , I have never used fear as a form of Domination .

Training you must be fair and the few rules you have in place should not be changed or altered. Now this is just my opinion and it works and worked for me.

Everything is earned , nothing is giving and what is earned can be taken away at the snap of a finger and this must be known.

Sitting at the dinner table is a privilege not a right. Sitting on the couch or chair is a privilege not a right, watching TV , texting friends , using a pad , showering , doing hair, nail polish everything is a privilege and privileges are earned not giving.

You the Master wants full and complete control , you the Master wants nothing less than full submission. You the Master wants loyalty , you want your needs met service and sexual.

Clothes in the house should be a privilege , I myself do not allow any clothes on unless I approve , but I am dressed , my right not a privilege.

Trust , Trust is HUGE , Trust is the main factor in the beginning of any relationship but even more so in our lifestyle. You can forget about any level of submission until you have full TRUST. You the Master will ask the Submissive or Slave do you trust me? The answer will always be YES. Dude it is a LIE a big FAT LIE there is no Trust there they don’t even really know you , why would you even ask such a question? Do you know why the answer was yes? Because it is what you wanted to hear and nothing more. You will know when the Trust begins and it will not happen over night. Now while you have been building this thing called TRUST you can fuck it up and the drop of a pin , meaning the first time you get stupid , lose your temper , screaming , calling names out of anger and if you can and that is a HUGE if you can start to rebuild what you fucked up.

Controlling your temper is much like gaining trust it does take time and it took me a very long time to learn how to channel my anger into something positive. Thinking before you speak will be your best friend , taking that deep breath , a silent deep breath and think about what you are going to say. That one short pause can save you weeks or months of work.  If you have anger issues you have zero business trying to own or be someones Dominant. Do I get mad? Absolutely I do I blow the fuck up but and there is a but not at my girls. Never. Remember they are in service to me.

Here comes the needy , here comes the codependency , but first things first I have to say because I will get a fucked email , not every submissive or slave is codependent , there I said it so deal with it. At any rate here it comes and it will hit you like a fucking train and you the Dom will deal with it because remember ? You wanted a relationship , this was the one and you are now president and will have to take that call at 3 am or what ever time 24/7. You have to be there 24/7 because you agreed to it and you said you would. So man up.

Actions speak louder than words , Actions are everything , Actions are visuals and we as humans are Visuals we see and for the most we believe even when it comes to watching news. You know what I am talking about so the visual comment is real. Actions mean everything. You sat your submissive down and you painted this white knight on this beautiful horse riding down the trail and swooping the submissive up and taking her back to your kingdom. You opened the can of worms now either you man up or you tell the truth , hey I am just looking for a quick fuck and nothing more. Be Honest.

Say what you mean and do what you say , actions speaks louder than words , you can now start building that bridge of trust. You will know when trust is achieved because a whole new room will open up and you will see a whole new openness , you will see a whole new person , someone who now desires to please , someone who has the need to please.

I love the word USE , and the word should be used often when you first begin your training. Sex is much different in our lifestyle mainly because in my eyes it is my right to use my property when and how I want , again the word USE. In the beginning stages using your submissive plays a very important role and there are two reasons. One it sets the scene and two it puts your submissive in her place. Now comes the hard part like when in a vanilla relationship the male spends much of his time begging to get some pussy , while the Dominant see’s sex as being a right. Sex is about me and only me. Yeah sounds pretty cold but there are times I will please but that type of pleasure is my call. Using your property is a reminder , it puts one in their place.

Taking privileges away , what was once so cherished now becomes a privilege as I stated above. Again everything is earned and what is earned can be taken back at any time. Limit the places in your home in which the submissive has access to , such as a spot on the floor next to the couch yea that one and only spot. Sitting next to you on the floor while you eat, and the submissive must not begin to eat until you have taken the first bite.

I find speaking in thirds to be very effective taking the words I and me out of the vocabulary . Replacing with your submissive or this submissive. Your Slave or this slave , the words I or me no longer has any meaning. This is a reminder of who and what she is and what her place in within the home.

This is done on a daily basis you cannot train 4 days and take 3 off it breaks the cycle. Your property will make mistakes and and verbal correction is all that is needed. The first 90 days will be the toughest but you should start to see things fall into place. Some catch on faster than others and raising your voice or beating her ass make no sense.

You cannot demand submission if you do it is fake submission. You cannot demand love if you do again it it fake love. Putting fear in someone makes no sense , you gain absolutely nothing with the exception of a swollen ego.

Respect your property and never ask them to do something you yourself would not do. Never ask for anything that is totally unrealistic , or something that would cause someone to fail. Always be positive and praise goes a long , long way.

I give reminders all the time to both of my girls , hey you know I truly appreciate everything you do. This is positive reinforcement , it is a builder and makes one feel proud and will want to please more.

I am not sure if I left anything out?

Consensual Objectification

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationship, Consensual Objectification, Dominant and Submissive, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Sexual Objectification, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Uncategorized with tags , , , on October 30, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

A very touchy subject to most ok for some it can be good but very can relate but I shall explain where I am coming from and maybe you will agree or maybe you will not.

 

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Sexual objectification is the act of treating a person as a mere object of sexual desire. Objectification more broadly means treating a person as a commodity or an object without regard to their personality or dignity. Objectification is most commonly examined at the level of a society, but can also refer to the behavior of individuals.

The concept of sexual objectification and, in particular, the objectification of women, is an important idea in feminist theory and psychological theories derived from feminism. Many feminists regard sexual objectification as deplorable and as playing an important role in gender inequality. However, some social commentators argue that some modern women objectify themselves as an expression of their empowerment.

Here come the feminist , I can hear the roar , the abuse , the lack of caring , but yet will lack the knowledge of what I am about to talk about.

Consensual Sexual Objectification , just as entering a D’s or M’s relationship everything is negotiated and is done so both fully understanding what is and is not being consented to.

Being treated as a object , a toy , but with these thoughts comes cherished , valued , and needed. I will explain my thoughts.

In a M’s relationship love is needed , caring is needed , communication is needed , showing appreciation , showing you value the relationship. There is a but and a big but , in order to maintain a M’s relationship there has to be some sort of separation in the mind.

Master and Slave not boyfriend and girlfriend or husband and wife , you are Master and Slave. In our minds we use the term owner/property. I own but it is a consensual ownership. A ownership that has grown over the years.

Arianna and I entered our relationship as Master and Slave so there was no confusion on where we stood. As we grew and our minds expanded , Arianna’s thoughts  came to Owner/property.

My thoughts turned to sexual objectification , a body for my use. A body for my use as I wanted to , when I wanted and how I wanted. I no longer see a mouth a pussy or ass I see three holes for my use. Yea that does sound pretty bad , in fact many will see it as abuse.

So what is the definition of Master and Slave ? Does a Slave have rights or a voice ? Absolutely they do , they have the rights and a voice , the same rights and voice when the relationship was negotiated. Can the terms of the relationship be renegotiated ? Again absolutely  at the Masters discretion. I myself decide when the terms of our relationship can be renegotiated. There is a but and a big but. If there is good communication a good Master can see the needs of his slave. A good Master will make adjustments and many times without the Slaves knowledge and I have done in the past and recent without Arianna knowing.

Can Arianna sit down and say hey I am interested a D’s relationship or a Daddy Baby girl relationship , would I then make adjustments ? Absolutely not , we met I explained my needs and wants in great detail , I also stated I was not willing to change or renegotiate my terms.

The frame of mind when it comes to the Slave , the need to serve , not a want. The need to please the owner , not because one is being forced. One cannot demand submission , one cannot gain submission through fear , submission is earned and earned through respect. Respect is not giving , respect is earned as with trust.

I have learned in the past in a D’s or M’s relationship you can let your feeling get in the way. Maybe not wanting to enforce rules , or when a rule is broken , not wanting to punish. I have also learned physical punished is not always the best avenue to take.

My way of thinking there has to be a mental wall , a wall that separates your feelings in a relationship. There is a very loving and caring side but there is a side that can be a total Dick.

In modern times we all know you cannot own a slave. The way we live is a mindset , it has grown into a way of living. Kinda like changing your eating habits trying to live a healthier life. It is not something that happens over night , there are steps that are taking and before you can take any steps you have to have a plan of action  and you must follow each step in the order you meant them to be. Once all steps are in place you have to maintain that level of everything you have put into place.

The object or the objectification , looking at someone as object even while having sex. Although there are feelings , I have a wall that separates two things , one being love , and the other being somewhat cold looking at my partner as a Slave , maybe cold is the wrong word but there is a wall..

RAPE

Now before I continue I will talk about consent , non-consent. If you both agree to enter a relationship is rape possible ? Now in a D’s relationship is rape possible? What about a M’s relationship is rape possible ? Is it right to give consent to fuck then take the consent away? If being in a relationship and your looked at as being a object a consensual object is rape possible? Rape is probably the worst act of violence there is. A man forcing himself on a woman or man , or maybe a woman raping a man. No one who commits such a act should never see the light of day.

My point is how can one consent then at a later date take the consent away? I am speaking about any type of relationship. There is a but , there is always a but. If there is a case of abuse , physical , mental or verbal which can be mental as well. Then I believe consent can be taken away.

I get fixated on a word at times and the word I am fixated on is Objectification , I stumbled across a article and it made a lot of sense. I contacted the Author and asked for permission to use his material and was granted permission.

– Sir Vice
© Limits Unleashed 2017

http://www.limitsunleashed.com/sexual-objectification-pt1/

Introduction

In this post I will be sharing a preview of a workshop I’m giving to a few events on sexual objectification & training.  In this instance we are defining sexual objectification fairly literally, that being (a) the act of treating a person as an instrument of sexual pleasure; (b) broadly implies treating a person as a commodity or an object.

The caveat is that none of the above should occur without full and enthusiastic consent.  In other words we are paying careful and mindful attention to the fact that we are dismissing the third common definition – (c) often without regard to others personal dignity or emotional experiences.

As a result, sexual objectification play is much more suited as an activity within a defined scene than a part of a 24/7 lifestyle. This is due to the risk that a habit can develop where the Dominant forgets that the submissive must be a willing participant.

Clarification

Consensual sexual objectification is less concerned with the immediate feelings or experience for the sake of providing or achieving a sense of value through utility.  Participants in BDSM and the objectification kink cannot fully remove all elements of self-agency and responsibility without the risk of it turning into abusive and unhealthy behaviors.  As a result, even objectification still must be consensual activity, though it can be very blurry (i.e. edge-play and/or Total Power Exchange).

As a result, this type of activity requires invoking a certain suspension of disbelief in having this role insisted on or subjected upon the submissive or bottom even though they are a willing participant, has negotiated proper opportunities and boundaries, and can cease such activities with the appropriate safe word.

Looking Deeper

There are many types and variants on sexual objectification. Most often the focus is on the use or attributes which defines the object, versus the experience (since objects don’t have experiences).  Common types include:

  • Role: bimbo/himbo, personal slut, sex slave
  • Toys & Parts: fuck doll, live dildo, T&A, etc
  • Degradation: party favor, house slut, performer/entertainment

So what is the attraction?  First we must acknowledge that the benefits people receive in sexual objectification are quite subjective to those involved. That said, the most often expressed benefits include a clear sense of role & purpose (utilitarian); the feeling of being removed guilt or shame; and a lighter conscious knowing that matters of safety and care are left to the one in control.

Sexual objectification is often no different in other forms of objectification in that the submissive or bottom will often experience being “turned on by turning off” – shutting off the brain, silencing the chatter, and allowing themselves to go into a state of dissociation (sub-space) and just “enjoy the ride”.

Note how these benefits often are about subverting the sense of personal agency to the whim of another’s control as a means to fulfilling desires or fantasies.  As such, sexual objectification is a very focused practice in power exchange – the Owner of the object, and the owned as the object, which exists for the enjoyment and use of the Owner.

All Good in Theory

As with many elements of BDSM and fetish activities, much sounds like a good idea in theory. I have found this to be particularly true of sexual objectification.  Indeed, the reality of such play may be vastly different that of your imagination.  As a result, all parties involved need to be mindful that something can (and likely will) go awry in practice.

All those involved must be prepared to plan for setbacks and triggers, as such events are nearly inevitable, and adapt accordingly.  Change and re-evaluation is an eventuality, not a possibility. This is largely because of the potential emotional risks involved in any kind of edge play, especially ones that are deeply psychological.  Key risk factors and setbacks include significant disillusionment; the loss of confidence or security in the relationship; prior abuse & PTSD triggers; mismatched pace or desire of progression (rushing); or finding deep contradictions in core values & beliefs.

As such, it is extremely important to strike a balance between the rewards and risks.  All those involved must be adaptable and ready to recognize challenges and change to help address issues.  In some cases that means taking a step back, while in others it may be re-negotiation as new limits may be uncovered.  Only thoughtful communication and discussion will help you surmount these moments and potentially adjust to them.

Closing

Depending on how well this post is received I may continue with a “part 2” will be looking at a methodology which describes a framework for how to actually train someone in this role. If you want to see part 2 make sure you rate the post and like/share through social media so we know you want more.   😉

For now, I will leave you with the strong suggestion that many things seem like a good idea at the time, and are exciting to entertain within the mind or bedroom on occasion.  Taking it further, however, requires significantly more investment of time and attention to ensure everyone is on the same page.  This means careful consideration of needs, wants, and limits; constantly evaluating and communicating; and being very adaptable and forgiving when things go off the intended path.

That said, if you find enough common working ground, you can find deep satisfaction and excitement as you explore hidden needs and unlock them through sexual objectification.

Yes there is a part two , the information here is really informative. I ran across several articles but found Sir Vice to have very in depth information…

Sexual Objectification Part 2 Training.

Introduction

In my prior post on Sexual Objectification Pt.1 I provided a high level introduction to what it is, why people do it, and some things to think about in terms of starting your exploration.  In this Part 2 writing I’m going to dive more into the Training aspect.  How does one train a submissive (or prepare if you are a submissive) for sexual objectification play and conditioning.  The methodologies in the following are typically key elements in sexual objectification training, which in no way is standardized.  Everyone has their own way of doing things. The below is presented in order of what I have found useful, but is subject to interpretation and the fit and response of those involved.

Negotiation

Before you even start the training, you have to try to get a full appreciation of the page on which everyone rests.  If you haven’t read my post on Negotiation & Consent, I strongly advise you do so before proceeding.

 

To review, Negotiation requires active participation by all parties to constructively and collaboratively build a framework of success.  This means being able to openly discuss desires, needs, limits, and potential solutions.  Sexual objectification training should therefore begin with an assignment for all to outline a history of inspiration or desire for this activity – What influences brought you here to desire to explore this aspect of yourself?   Itemize the desires, fantasies, wants and needs in one list.  Similarly, you should also itemize potential triggers, traumas, restrictions, or limitations.  For both of these lists it’s important to then prioritize by “forced ranking” – meaning each category can only have one number one or top priority.  This helps to reduce conflict resolution between wants, needs, and limitations.

 

Only once this is accomplished can you hope to sit down to compare & contrast ones desires with the limits, both for yourself (no matter what side of the power dynamic you are on) as well as between those involved.  This is when you start to work to find solutions as a cooperative team with the goal of developing something that is mutually satisfying.

Planning

Once everyone has a common understanding and goal, it takes some planning to get there.  Achieving any goal or destination requires some degree of active planning, at least at a high level or outline format.  This is to help ensure progress is taken in measured steps, and that all involved are ready for the next step once signs are clear.  As in Negotiation, there needs to be ongoing discussion about readiness, comfort levels, and if the goals remain valid.  Remember that change is inevitable, especially as progress is made, and one has to adjust accordingly.

 

Execution and planning is largely up to Dominant/Owner in the relationship, having drafted at least a rough plan or road-map with Indicators that things are on the right track.  The submissive must provide feedback & input, so a calm “sit down” is required prepare the submissive mentally and help remind them this is something that they accepted and are actively responsible for choosing to support.

Intensity & Control

Once conditioned to respond, constant use becomes predictable. As such one needs to intensify use through building sexual tension, feelings of suspense, even lack of use.  One needs to disrupt the rhythm in order to add to the intensity.  There is no brightness without experiencing the shadow, so contrast is required to help highlight the response and value from use.  One can accomplish this with periods of abstinence, edging, ad hoc “quickies”, public sexual simulation (without release), and others.

 

This is a form of control via removing the submissive’s sense of personal agency and self-control. The more the submissive is likely to be used at any time, the more likely they become compliant and remain fully “on alert” and desirous. Of course, you cannot do this without slowly ramping up the level of control.  You can exhibit control through general appearance & dress, dictated use (when and where), forced orgasm, using some spontaneous variety and/or innovation, etc.   Essentially you want to get to a place that says the sexual object is to be used by any and all (negotiated) means, at any time or place.  Again, within the confines of the negotiated and consensual terms.

 

Note that the above introduces selective chaos by creating patterns and then disrupting them.  We break the pattern to add to the suspense, we add tension by adding measures of interruption or uneven rhythm.  The purpose is to stimulate desire while conditioning to be “always ready” since the when is never quite known.  While surprise can build anxiety, if carefully employed gradually over time, it can greatly enhance progress.

Assess & Revise as Needed

Pushing the envelope of progression too far & too fast will cause problems, setbacks, or relationship failures.  All involved need to keep communication channels open and have regular “touch base” conversations.  Avoid giving in to frenzy or over-ambitiousness and trying to speed things along, as this will often lead to a catastrophic failure.  Cautious pacing is needed, as well as the need to remain adaptable.  Sometimes a step back is required to evaluate where someone is emotionally, physically, or otherwise.  The more we respect the truth that everyone processes their inner world experiences differently and at different rates, the less firm out expectations are and the more flexible we can be to a given situation.  The benefit of being “soft” is that we can respond with grace under pressure and allow progress to resume, even if modified.  What is too resolute and hard in its ways will often break.

 

Bear in mind broken toys are no fun, and leaving wreckage is irresponsible at best.  If we can accept the reality as it happens, then we can manage the consequences more readily and appropriately.  Managing the consequences (versus the intent) means working collaboratively, being clear in communication, and honesty with yourself and with all others.  Other than just managing the situation, we have to show compassion – care for another’s wellbeing.  Keep in mind to prioritize safe & healthy practices which will not damage or harm yourself or others physically or emotionally.  Take care of yourselves, of one another, and remember this is only a Part of your life, not the whole of it.

Conclusion

Sexual objectification focuses on use & utility, and while very exciting a notion, it often can sounds better in theory than in practice.  Be very honest about wants, needs, limits & risks, and focus on collaborative negotiation constructively for everyone’s success.   Bear in mind this is a form of conditioning, so take your time, there’s no need to rush, and being able to move forward at all is better than having to abandon ship entirely.  Since sexual objectification training is like any edge-play, there are increased risks inherent – be adaptable, flexible, and able to change as needs arise.

– Sir Vice
© Limits Unleashed 2017

Any type of training takes time , the first initial maybe 90 days , then depending on your goal 8 to 12 months. There is a conditioning  a transformation the slave goes through and this is a slow process. The training never ends it is a daily activity , that comes with consistency.

Vile

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Control The Mind Control The Body

Posted in bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, Dominance, Dominant and Submissive, Dominants who suffer from depression, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Train your slave with tags , , , on October 3, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Anybody can bark orders , anybody can intimidate someone into submission , but when you do that you are not getting true submission, it fakes you have absolutely nothing. You can scream , you can lose your temper or the best is using names like you worthless whore , cum dump or you stupid bitch. It goes on and on , you are the dominant at that moment and time. Making someone fear you does not equal service , humiliating someone does not make you a dominant. Forcing someone to have a low self esteem does not make you a dominant. The above you do not control anything you are forcing, and it is only you who needs the self gratification, you need that ego boost and really know absolutely nothing about true submission .

I have spoken in the past about Best slave training , http://bestslavetraining.com/ This is a awesome source of information. Recently I was made group leader of Best Slave Training on Fetlife which is truly an honor.. CuffsMaster the Moderator had taken a leave of absence and others were trying to take over the group. Some had said they tried to reach out to CuffsMaster and received no reply. On Fetlife if a group goes Un-moderated for a length of time , one can petition and take over the group. The funny thing I emailed CuffsMaster and he responded in less than an hour. That would be like well Vile has not posted in over a month and I want to take over his wordpress. I am also the Director of MAsT Kissimmee , which falls under MAsT International. http://www.mast.net/ MAsT International is dedicated to education within the lifestyle and is also world wide.

In other news there is now Thekinkyworldofvile.com which I am really excited about , this will allow me to be more open and practice my first amendment without fear of being shut down as I have been in the past. I was told I was not a real or serious blogger because I use wordpress. The truth be known I am not nor do I consider myself a blogger , what I do is share information so that others may take a little and put my words to good use. Everything I write about and I am by no means a professional writer is about my life, my thoughts , where I was and where I am at now in the present. At times I do share what others have shared meaning I will re-blog something but that does not happen very often. I will use quotes from other sites after asking permission. If the site is old , 5,10, 15 years and I contact someone and I do not get a response then I may post or I may not.

Submission is not giving nor can you take it. Submission is earned and there are steps that has to be taken. Earning trust is a huge factor , trust is not something that happens over night. Training is not something that happens over night.

When I was younger my thoughts of having a naked slave in the house seemed fun , it seemed controlling , there was power but little did I know there was a reason and a very valid reason and years later I would put my thoughts to good use. Out in public my girls are covered. Going out both girls are always dressed better than I am, do not take that wrong because I dress very nice when I go out. Keeping both covered shows respect , and it shows those in the community I have respect for my property not that it matters.

Keeping nude in the house is not a power thing nor is it a ego thing , it is continuous training , it is a mindset a reminder she is a slave. It has little to do with sex although it is there for my taking. Being nude is a high protocol of mine , I speak of protocols often but they are needed. Protocols are not only meant for training they are meant as a reminder. You keep reminding and it keeps your property in that frame of mind.

Many see BDSM as a sex tool , the kink , the spanking , flogging and bondage although those are good benefits but the lifestyle or my lifestyle runs so much deeper. BDSM has changed so much over the past 5 years or so and has turned to more of a kink base. Hey do you want me to tie you up and beat your ass , then you can suck my cock when we are done? There is no emotional contact just physical no meaning , no connection.

Today there are far more what I call true Submissive’s and true Slaves than there are true Dominants or Masters. Years ago it was just the opposite , I suppose things change. I wanted to introduce a Dom to a submissive , I explained she owned her own house , she made 45k a year and looking for a real Dominant. He asked me what she was looking for and I explained not to much , strict rules , complete control and accountability . His words were fuck that. I was like really dude?

Every time I meet a new sub or slave my words of advice is to think with a clear head , know what you need , and do not give in. How often does that work ? Never maybe for the first two hours then its like running down the street butt ass naked. At some point the stupid switch turns on and this Sub frenzy kicks in. You end up falling for the first Dom you meet which 99% of the time is online. My advice is to go out in public and meet people who can relate to you but the answer is always I am to shy or I don’t have time but you have time to turn your cam on and get naked, sending pics of yourself everyday to a man you do not even know. You give your phone number your address , where you work and within a week all of your passwords. WTF? Then you give all of your banking information to someone you hardly know. You have no idea where this guy lives , you have never been to his house , fuck you don’t even know where he works. What makes it sad is you know everything seems wrong , you know you do not want to give out any information but you do it out of fear. The fear of loss is a motherfucker , you fear you will never find another but in reality you are getting nothing out of the relationship with the exception of being used.

To control the mind you must know your slave , you must know their habits , food , movies , music , why the like the clothes they buy. What they fear , love , care about, what gives that cozy feeling. The master should be able to anticipate thoughts , movements and needs without asking.

These guys who spend so much time playing games just to get pussy or their cock sucked are total losers. They have huge egos , and for the most they suffer from depression and have a insecurity problem. Most do not even have a pot to piss in and are under employed.

Get in the mind and you can have anything you want without question….

 

 

Married And Interested In BDSM

Posted in bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Couples New To BDSM, Dominant and Submissive, http://bestslavetraining.com/, relationships, Slave, Submission, Submissive with tags , , , on August 21, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Stepping into the lifestyle and being a vanilla couple can be challenging but it can be obtained. I am not speaking of the Dom/sub bedroom only I am speaking of making a huge step into a total different world. The longer you are married the more difficult it will prove to be. The main reason is you already know each other inside and out. You will both need to do hours , days and months of research. Try your best to keep from speaking to others until you both think you have found your place. If you start trying to listening to others it can become confusing because everybody is different , and what works for one couple will not work for another.

Who will take on the Dominant role? Who will take on the Submissive role? Either way both have to decide just how much control one wants to give up and the other how much control one wants to take on.  Are you both looking at Dominant /Submissive , Master and Slave , Daddy/Baby girl who fits where and why?

This is when the time comes to sit down and just start talking crazy, all of those kinky thoughts you have had but you’ve been afraid to say anything in fear of what your partners thoughts might be. The best way is to write everything down a list 1 to 10 starting with the ones you are most interested in. As you bring each subject up talk about it and why you like it or may like it. This is when your fantasy’s come out but you have always been afraid to bring those up.

In my years I have found men are the ones who are most resistant to any kinky ideas and most do not want added responsibility. This is due to the wife cooking , cleaning house , laundry , grocery shopping , paying all the bills , and if you have kids taking care of them.

Some years ago I would only see married women , and there was no sex involved at all. Ranging anywhere from early 30’s to mid 60’s. What took place was bondage , some lite spanking , a lot of humiliation , oh did I mention head , I got a lot of head but according to congress here in the US , oral sex is not sex. You did not think I would take time out of my day and get nothing out of it did you? The bottom line is each Submissive I met had a couple of things in common. One a lack of communication. Two they women were afraid of bringing the topic up. Three when their kink was talked about they were told they were sick get over it.

Discussing what direction you both want to go and again just how far. Our lifestyle is so diverse , there is no end and we are all different. What some may call a D’s relationship others may call it just kink , or while others may call it extreme.

Allow mistakes to happen because they will , you will probably spend hours and hours talking about the progression and the mistakes. There is no need to get discouraged , the important thing is to learn from your mistakes. Allow growth and explore and take notes and talk about things you do not like or your not will to do , put limits in place.

Get out in the community , go to local events there will be a lot you can learn especially when it comes to play , rope but most important impact play, safety is very important.

It is a long road but can be very exciting and the growing never ends… A lot of couples talk but do not talk openly , a lot are not able to share their feelings or thoughts in fear of the reaction they will get.

Why do people cheat ? They cheat because there is something they are missing, and it can be something as simple as communication , a lack of attention , maybe the sex needs to be worked on. Most see see sex as a one way street. With men however the cheating has to do with sex. The wife wont give head or is against anal sex , or maybe just kink. This is why communication is so important. Most people think its easier to just walk away instead of fixing something.. All you have to do is pack up and start all over and most of the time you leave with less than what you started with.

You both may seem lost at times , you may see yourself struggling , but if you both stay vigilant your world will rock.

A good source for information

bestslavetraining.com

Vile

 

Why Not Give Her A Chance

Posted in bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, commitment, communication, Dominant and Submissive, Slave, Submissive, Train your slave, training your slave with tags , , , , on August 12, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

I was going to blog about something else but as I started this topic came to mind. I have over 2000 post but I do not believe Ive touched on this subject or if I did I am sure this will cover different material.

I had a friend and the key word is had , Arianna and Lynn had met him before a couple of times but in the past two years he has dated some two hundred women and met them on different dating sites. Every women he has met has had something wrong ranging from ADHD , to Depression , Anxiety , and a couple of girls back Asperger’s Syndrome.

Some men or Doms enter a relationship looking for the bad , looking for something wrong. Maybe the way they dress , which you can change , hair which you can change , they way they eat , which you can change , the way they communicate which you can change, their thought process which you can change or if you find nothing wrong at all you make something up.

If you are A Dominant , Master or Owner you have the ability to change anything in your relationship , you can change any of the above , you can alter ones way of thinking , but and there is a but, it will take some time and work on the Doms side , it will mean time invested.

Now this does not mean to be the knight on the White Horse , this does not mean to rescue. This does not mean to have someone dump all their problems on your plate and say hey fix this. If you meet someone and there is a container full of problems and they truly want a relationship you as the Dominant can give direction on how to fix everything but you should not enter any type of relationship until said problems are fixed. If the Submissive truly wants a relationship he or she will take the proper steps to begin fixing things if they are not willing to put forth a effort then drop them and move on , because some broke dick will step in and rescue. If you rescue it will not work , once everything is fixed you are gone.

On a mental level there are just some areas you do not want to step into. This does not mean someone is broke , no one is broke it just means what ever the problem is , is more than you can handle. You also have to look at the medications someone is taking , for instance someone who is suffering from Schizophrenia , I would think it would not be fair to even attempt to bring he or she into the lifestyle. Someone suffering from depression this does not rule out but what medications are they taking and why? It takes time to get to know someone but in out way of life it moves at subsonic speed. Many times you find yourself as a submissive sucking cock on the first date , or being tied up and getting your ass beat or your brains fucked out of you. Yes the first date how in the fuck does this happen? Then within  a day even then after you were fucked you find a collar around your neck and the dude knows absolutely nothing about you but and there is a but that will probably be the last time you wear the collar or maybe just during play.

So instead of just looking for the bad , concentrate on the good , find the good qualities , but more important look at the possibility’s , look at the quality’s , look at the compatibility, but more important what is the potential, look at the potential and what you could see in the future.  Look at how sincere their submission is , listen to their words look at their eyes. What are their goals ? What are your goals? If you look at everything meaning the whole picture you the Dominant may want to invest some time.

Start off small a few rules , give correction if needed , but this in no way means beating someone. You can go much farther speaking with someone adult to adult explaining what was done wrong or why a rule was broken. Barking orders does not make you a Dominant. Someone with good communications skills , someone who can listen , someone who can  give direction when looking out for the relationship.

Seeing potential in someone is very hard if your just interested in getting the pussy. Once you have banged her everything else goes out the window you no longer care because you hunted , you found , and you conquered.

Some are just happy with the kink , some are happy with just having a weekend fuck buddy , but there are many looking for more. Im thinking just how much of your life do you as a male or female want to waste. We as humans are a commodity and as we grow older our value drops. Our value drops each day , each month and each year for those of you who continue to play games. There will come a time when you roll over in bed and find yourself alone.

Seeing potential in someone , willing to invest time in someone can be very rewarding. If you are a experienced Dominant or Master and you put together a good training program , the rewards are not limited. If both are serious and in the right frame of mind , the growing never ends.

I pride myself on my relationship maintaining a drama free home with no problems. Make no mistake managing two can be a task at times but for the most everything just falls into place. Working together as a team makes a huge difference , and communicating. Every night at dinner that is our talk time and no cell phones are allowed , this is when everyone can speak freely about what is on their mind.

Sometimes we fail to see what a submissive or slave has to offer , it goes way beyond the the kink or just having someone around to clean. If your looking for a maid then you should move in with your mother.

Some Dominants you meet are insecure , emotional , and controlling. Those who have temper problems , a Dom who has a temper is a total no , no. Becoming a Dominant is a long learning process and many relationships will fail until you have found yourself and you have found the one who fits you. My advice would be when meeting someone take your time get to know your potential partner. Get to know them as a person and best friend before taking that huge step. Our way of life is so much deeper than just having a BDSM relationship you have to have some type of vanilla in your life..

Depression can be handled , weight can be handled , someone who is insecure can be handled.  Someone who is not organized can be handled , Someone who is emotional can be handled. Most anything can be handled if you the Dominant wants to take on such responsibility’s. Its very important if you start something finish it. Before you start make sure its a task you want to take on. If something does not work right it is on you the Dominant your the one in control , your the one who is training , your the one who makes sure everything stays in order..

If you are in a long distance relationship most of the above does not apply, in order to be in full control you must be able to reach out and touch , if your doing it by phone , or cam your playing a game…

 

My Cocoon And Fucking

Posted in Arianna, ass fucking, ass to mouth, bdsm, Bondage, Dominant and Submissive, Humiliation, Rough Sex, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Throat Fucking with tags , , , , on June 28, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Some days I sit back and think about how it all started , how over the years I went through this crazy transformation, how I was different and did not really fit in.

I grew up with a very dysfunctional family , always fighting , I mean fighting throwing punches not me but my parents , real hand to hand combat. Addiction to pain pills and binge drinking and yet I still for the most managed to stay mostly unnoticed.

I had no idea where I was going or how I would turn out but I knew what I did not want to be and that was like my parents.

The age of I am thinking 13 we moved to a little hick town one of our many moves and I remember my first day of school the 6th grade. Meeting the principle and him walking me to my first period class. As the door opened to the classroom , my first thoughts were holy fucking shit ,what the fuck have my parents done now ? Crew cuts , cowboy boot , army style hair cuts and overhauls.

My hair was almost to my waist and I was thinking this would never work , now I fit in less. I was right for about the first 6 months , the guys mostly ignored me but the girls for the most was pretty friendly. Sitting in class who ever sat behind me would braid my hair.

I remember one of the guys making fun of me because I had been wearing the same pair of jeans to school for 6 months , again my parents were pretty much useless but at 13 I had to do something about it.

Right across the street from us was a restaurant called the Skyline Cafe a little mom and pop place that was always busy. I walked over one day and asked the owner if there was anything I could do to make a little money. The next day I was washing dishes after school making 2.01 an hour. I started at 2.30pm and worked until 10.30 and still getting up for school. At the age of 13 I was making like 90 bucks a week so it was time to make some changes.

Family Discount , they were good for selling clothes that were seconds , meaning when finished something did not pass inspection. In about 3 weeks I had a closet full of clothes.

At the age of 15 I went to work at a cotton mill , and I was trained to work on a thread machine, now I was making 4.91 an hour and soon 6 dollars an hour making more than either one of my parents. I was working second shift and still going to school and at home I pretty much stayed to myself , locked in my room with my Tv and Boom box.

One day this was a few years back I got nosy and while my parent were gone I went into their bedroom and started going through their stuff not really looking for anything. Then I found this box under the bed full of paperback books. I sit down and started reading and I was thinking holy fuck what the fuck? Books like the daughter next door , the Babysitter, but they all had one thing in common. They are all about nasty degrading fucking. Rough humiliating sex , face fucking , stretching the ass with massive cocks, pulling hair and yes bondage. I fucking struck gold , I took two of the books and off to my room I went. Jumping in bed pulling my pants off and just started reading and jacking off. I now have learned about the birds and the bees. I knew what sex was and , and how a girl wanted to be treated.

Over a short period of time when I first started working one thing I noticed that was different was my confidence it was off the chain. I had changed , I was more out going, more out spoken and could walk up to a girl and strike up a conversation.

My biggest thing was what was called leisure suits with bell bottoms. I had a different color suit for every day of the week , and silk shirts but lets not forget the platform shoes. I felt like a rock star and the feeling was good instead of walking there was somewhat of a strut.

Riding the bus home one day I found myself sitting next to a girl named Beverly , she was not that pretty but had a fucking body that would derail a train. Talking and she invited me over to her house one Saturday. When she answered the door my jaw dropped she was wearing this short tee shirt and nothing under although I did not notice until in her bedroom and she sat one the bed. Here was my chance to put everything I had learned to work after all from reading I knew everything about sex.

Spread your legs so I can see your cunt bitch, the look in her eyes was a true Kodak moment but she did, grabbing her hair and shoving two fingers in her going as deep as I could I started pounding her. Standing up I dropped my pants grabbed her by her and to her knees shoving my cock in her mouth I began fucking her. What a fucking feeling , what a fucking rush. It was like two minutes and I blew my load. Once I let go Beverly sat back and just said holy fuck. I pulled my pants back up and said I gotta go and I just walked out. That was the beginning of my travels , that was the change, that is what got me to where I am today.

The next time I saw Beverly we went into the woods but I had something different in mind , this times I had rope with me and I was looking for the perfect spot , the perfect trees. Ahh there we go I placed her between two trees and told her to get naked. Without any hesitation in a matter of seconds she was butt ass naked. Grabbing one wrist I tied it with rope and attached it to a tree, then the other wrist. Sitting back I got this kinda evil feeling running through me and I walked behind her and took my belt off, remember the books , I knew what she wanted. I stood back and grabbed my belt the buckle in one hand and smack right across her ass then again and again until her ass was blood red and she did not say a word. I walked up behind her puling her ass towards me just bent over a little dropping my pants and I shoved my cock in her pussy yea the first time. Fucking seemed like forever , I guess because my mind was racing, I pulled out and found her ass and right in I went, then it was only seconds I blew my load. As I was fucking her ass I reached up and grabbed her throat and squeezed tight that is when I blew. Stepping back and looking I was thinking what power , I just took what I wanted.

Walking in class I would walk up to her and tell her to meet me behind the gym at lunch. On your knees, I would fuck her mouth cum and tell her to go eat. She always did what I told her and without question.

The bad thing is girls talk so reaching high school I did not date very much. There were a few but those were short lived. One or two outings and I was just ignored until I met Shannon , Shannon was a small little chunky blonde who had a ass sent straight from heaven and there was one thing I knew I had to have it. She had very pale skin and deep blue eyes , very soft spoken , quiet . She like me was a loner we stayed to ourselves , so we kinda hit it off. She to was much like Beverly , but Shannon was different her and I actually talked , played games together you know fun stuff but the sex was fucking incredible I could do pretty much anything I wanted to. Our relationship lasted about a year, there was no bondage just straight out fucking. The mouth , pussy and ass , she really hated being fucked in the ass but she took it. I knew she did not like being fucked in the ass but it was not about her it was about me , so once again I was dumped but it did not matter because Beverly was my go to girl. It felt incredible because I had this sense of power over her. I could treat her like shit and she would come at the snap of a finger. Beverly was my first ass to mouth. Fucking her ass pulling out shoving my cock in her mouth and back in her ass.

As I said my parents were drunks , both took turns going in and out of rehab , both had been hospitalized for drug over dose multiple times.

I was getting ready to turn 17 and a Army recruiter came to our high school , while listening to the spill I had one thing in mind and that was get the fuck out. One friday the recruiter stopped by and picked me up and I went down to take a test , the next week at high school I was told I passed. So I left with a huge file getting home I waited till dinner once finished I started talking about going to camp. I had to talk early because one or both would soon be passed out. Summer camp is where I wanted to go so I put the papers on the table everything marked in yellow , yea just sign here and here and here.

That night I went to a phone booth and made the call telling him my parents had signed everything. October 14th the age of 17 the car pulled up in front of out apartment and off to Atlanta I went. Then a snag , I was like 4 pounds under weight what the fuck ? So I was put up in a hotel room across the street from the famous Fox Theater. 3 days I was fed peanut butter and banana sandwiches. On the 18th I was put on a train headed to Ft Dix New Jersey. I was in for a rude awakening , it was the first time in my life I had truly been scared.

One thing I had learned by then , life was based on two things. That would be choices and consequences.

A whole new life had opened up , once I finished Basic training I was off to Aberdeen Proving grounds. This is where I took a turn for the worse, smoking pot , taking pills and my first experience with Acid. Going to Titty bars at 17 being able to drink , I thought I was all grown up but it would take me several years to regain control.

Two tours in Korea this was my first experience with the world of BDSM I have posted a story about that. Then from Korea I was off to Germany where I met Gretchen , Gretchen was a beverly but only hotter. She had this goth nasty look. visiting a bar that looked like a cave, a singer named Nina was playing that night. Standing at the bar I turned and looked and I thought holy sweet jesus there is a god.  I walked up to her and she just looked at me and for the first time in my life I was speechless. I turned and walked away had a few more beers and walked back over and I just said you are fucking hot here’s a beer and she took it.

Gretchen was only 4’10 and weighed about 85 pounds , and always dressed goth, knee high platform boots with ripped stockings and gloves with no fingers. Jet black hair , and wore dark makeup.

Her and I would go over to a friend of mines place we would all be drinking , Gretchen laying across my lap and I would be fingering her ass , or have her suck my cock while we played cards. Going out when needing a taxi she would call at a phone booth and while waiting she would drop to her knees and blow me, she would even blow me sometimes in the taxi or at a bar.

Jumping ahead a few years I left the Army after serving 8 years. This is when I got slapped in the face. Still drinking , smoking pot and popping pills. Losing my first three jobs. Sitting down one night I thought to myself this is the same road my parents had taking.  So I fixed it I went cold turkey , took a month off to gather my thoughts.

Here I am today life is good and Ive calmed down quite a bit. Ive learned to control my anger. I now think logical , deep and hard before making huge decisions. Ive learned to love and not lust , although the lust does come out in thoughts.

I am now Married to my wife and slave Arianna , and our sister L life could not be any better. Last year my health started catching up to me and I had to make some drastic changes but there has been a huge improvement and it gets better every day.

Just a little more about me , much love to everyone who comes by and more so to those who comment. It may take a few days but I will reply.

 

 

The Power Of Slave Training

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7, BDSM Relationships, Dominant and Submissive, Face Fucking, fetlife, Master And Slave, molding your slave, owned property, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Total Power Exchange, Total Submission, TPE, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , , , , , on June 26, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Training has to be a need , not a want, if it is just a want it has no meaning. One day a week or so ago Arianna made the comment about the Topic Brainwashing , other topics have been Hypnosis. Both topics were really no surprise as she spends a good deal of time looking for other ways to offer her submission even more than she does now, she continues looking for ways to give up more control.

A TPE relationship or Total Power Exchange is not a easy task and even more so if it is a micromanaged but as time goes on it becomes less of a task and more of a way of life. Generally it takes both about 90 days to get their feet in the ground and well adjusted.

So lets set sex to the side for now and concentrate on the building of a lasting relationship. In the past sex was hard to put on the back burner. Putting sex on the back burner is very important and it is a need in order to build a successful D’s Or M’s relationship.

Training is a need and not a want , I mean the type of need that keeps you awake at night, the need to please someone , the need to give up control. If your needs are met then there are no wants..

Your body and mind belongs to someone else, you are told how to do your hair, the color, nails and how do dress. Sex will be new as well , your told how to suck dick , how to fuck, you become a toy.

Arianna and I spoke at our local munch this past week on the building a TPE , Total power exchange relationship. We love sharing our story on how we met , how we started and how we grew and today we continue to grow.

Sitting back and watching the transformation , the changes not so much at first but then you can see almost on a daily basis. The Slave however in most cases are not fully aware of any changes at all.

Starting out taking small privileges away , things that are cherished such as being able to sit on furniture, being able to sit at the dinner table and sitting on the floor next to you. Giving direct times to shower , using the bathroom asking permission to do anything. The forming of habits it very important , again being consistent on a daily basis , even hourly.

I prefer keeping my property nude while at home , no clothes unless I give the word. This bring on a more humble feeling , the feeling of being exposed. At times depending on the company who comes over determines if I allow clothes or not. Putting restrictions in place on when and where the Slave can sit and permission must be giving before any type of action.

Everything is earned nothing is giving , there are goals put in place and goals must be reached before moving on to the next level of training. Reaching goals there are small rewards, small privileges are giving. What ever is giving depends on your dynamic , your agreement in your relationship after all each is different.

If you the Dominant are going to put rules in place , protocols you have the responsibility to explain everything in full detail so the Slave understands what you are saying. The Slave should be able to ask for clarification if there are still unanswered questions.

Training a Slave or Submissive cannot begin until you know either inside out, you cannot impose any rules without fully knowing the needs.

The Slave is not your mother , the Slave is not your grandmother , if you want a mommy figure then move back home. I pickup behind myself , there are some days I cook and I will explain why.

We expect so much from our property , and you can get to a point to where there is a breaking point , so we as Dominants have to take up some of the load. Every Slave needs down time, a time to relax , clear their head. Get out for the day , see friends or family , go to a movie doing something giving the mind a chance to relax. This also allows down time for the Dominant, because not only do we work but we take care of the home as well. I myself need that time alone just as a Slave does, I need that time to clear my head.

Accountability is huge , there is a lot of meaning behind that word. The Slave has to know they are held accountable for their actions. The Slave has to know there are consequences. The Slave has to know the privileges giving can be taken away at any time. If you are going to punish then punish , you cant bark like a wolf and never attack. Say what you mean and do what you mean and if your going to punish explain in detail why and what punishment you are going to use. However you cannot sit around and watch hoping something is going to go wrong you are setting the Slave up for failure.

Rules are meant for improvement , rules are meant to be followed however I prefer protocols over rules. If enough realistic protocols are in place then very few rules are needed.

Using the Slave , and this has worked for me over the years but more so while in my relationship with Arianna. In the beginning stages of our relationship I made it clear sex was all about me. If she was allowed to cum it was earned and no I was not using Orgasm control, again its about me. The slave gives her self , and giving I mean fully.

You the Dominant when entering a relationship make your needs known upfront, lay everything out on the table, be clear and make sure the Slave understanding. If the Slave states one of your needs is off limits then sit down and talk. At this point you cannot be making any type of demands. If the two of you cannot come to an agreement then you move on. Just as the Slave is looking for the right owner , the Owner is looking for the right Slave.

Watching fifty shades of grey almost made me sick, although the movie is credited to bringing more men and women alive and opening their eyes , and I am sure it has helped some relationships in the bedroom.

The first movie while negotiating their contract Mr Grey gave in to almost all of his needs, the word is need. The second movie when begging for her to come back he got down on his knee almost begging. This showed how weak he was , I was really disappointed.

While the movie was based on being submissive during sex , there was absolutely nothing in the movie about a Dominant or Submissive on how they live on a daily bases, there was no structure , thus having no meaning. The Movie had nothing to do with Master and Slave. To some men the movie was a open door to abuse, some men think all women think that way and that is just not true.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/02/23/college-student-accused-of-rape-claims-he-was-reenacting-50-shades-of-grey/?utm_term=.93211a13bf53

It is really fucked up how some people think, its fucked up how those who call themselves Dominants and see submission as a form of weakness.

Back to using , once you have agreed to enter a relationship and the terms are made clear you are ready to begin. I find the words making love very hard to use, It is seldom I can even get off in that frame of mind. I have the mindset I am using my property , I am using my property for my pleasure, I am using my property so I can get off. At times I am extremely rough and at times not so much. I love getting my cock sucked , there is not a better feeling and while I try to be somewhat gentle yea it does not end up as such.  I use the term face fucking, I love that gagging feeling , feeling the muscles grabbing my cock. I love anal sex at times I use lube then there are times I go straight from the mouth to the ass or from the pussy to the as. I love ass to mouth, which makes me wonder if banks know what ATM really means. The word again is use , you use your property.

This is something I shared on Fetlife.

I am not into the pain , I am not into humiliation although at times I do believe it is necessary .
I am not into abuse of any kind , be it physical , mental , or verbal.

My slave and I just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary and I cannot begin to explain how blessed I am .

On our wedding day we also had a collaring ceremony and to this day my slaves collar has never been off.

I am into a well structured home , I am into a drama free home, I am into a problem free home.

I run a very strict home , rules are followed , I have strict protocols in place both are followed without question.

I am into communication I set time aside on a daily basis.
There are no cell phones allowed during any meal public or private.

My slave comes first without question.

To this day we have yet to have a single argument, this is something I take pride in.

I just wanted to say thank you Arianna

I crave the control , I crave the structure , I crave the drama free life , I crave the problem free life, I am living the dream.

I dont want passwords  to accounts that is just fucking childish , if I cant trust you I dont need you. I am far from insecure, however I will take the phone or pad and go through when I feel like it. I think in 4.5 years ive going through Ariannas phone and pad maybe 5 times , Lynn now our third once.  There is a huge difference in being in control and being controlling.

Find your space , find your needs , and find someone who shares the same interest you have..