Archive for the Dominant Category

Rules And Training

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Structure, BDSM TPE Relationships, cock sucking, codependent, Collar, communication, compatibility, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, MAST, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Protocols, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Submissive being used, training your slave on January 17, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

I get emails from Submissive’s and Slaves asking me questions about training and rules. Meeting Doms for the first time.

You meet on a dating site you send messages back and forth and the Dom hounds you for your phone number until you give in.

The first questions are how long have you been in the lifestyle, you state you are new to the lifestyle but you want to learn. BOOM first mistake you are hooked. You start texting back and forth hes not really asking questions about you he is more interested in what you’re limits are , are you bi sexual ? Do you swallow ? Do you do anal ? What is the shortest skirt you own ? Do you ever go without panties ? How often do you masturbate ?

So after being hounded you agree to meet because you are tired of the pressure. The place is classy probably a Denny’s in the corner . He has instructed you to wear a short skirt with no panties. You have second thoughts but agree after all you want to make a good impression. You are instructed certain time to text because the Dom is busy with work and works really crazy hours and when you do text most of the time it takes several hours to get a response or even a day or so.

When you meet the Dom still knows very little about you or you’re family and friends , what you enjoy doing in you’re spare time, music or food , just the kink side of things.

You are instructed not to make eye contact and you are told to address him as Sir. He does most of the talking mainly because you are afraid to ask any questions even though some of it does not sound right.

He spends a great deal of time just talking about himself , and bragging about everything he has done and ask very few questions about you.

Most likely hew ill pull out a collar he bought at Walmart or petco and throws it at you and you are now owned..

Now you’re training starts you walk out and get his car he unzips his pants and you are instructed to suck his cock. Keep in mind you have no clue who this dude really is, you have no clue where he lives because you do not have his address, you don’t even know where he works, and you are about to suck his dick.

You know in you’re mind this cannot possibly be right because you are seeking more but you will blow him just to please. These are guys who do not have a clue nor do they care about you or the out come.

The most difficult about training is being able to sit down and out a plan together. What worked with the last relationship will not work on the next. Every Slave or Submissive has a different personality , they have different needs and the out come of the training will be different.

You’re questions , why do you want to train me ? What is the end goal you have in mind ? What am I going to get out of you’re training ? What are you going to get out of training me ? Now this next question will stump a Dom who has no clue. What are you’re protocols public and private ? What type of structure will you provide? Do you have any Ex issues ? That is a huge biggie many Ex’s still have a hold on his belt. Am I going to come first ? Will I have 24/7 access to you ?

A few of the first questions a Dom will ask before even knowing you’re favorite color is are you Bi ? Are you poly ? Do you mind if I see other women ? What are you’re limits ? That is usually the first or second question believe it or not. Do you swallow ? Yes a lot of women do not. Do you like Anal sex? Everything is about sex and nothing about you.

To train you is to know you , You say you are a Slave but maybe you are not sure so there are questions that has to be asked and you have to be completely honest.

To train you is to know you , how you think , what makes you think the way you do, you’re habits , the likes , the dislikes what areas if any need improvement.

This should be you’re train of thought , although I have needs not wants but needs , my main purpose is to serve and please. The train of thought should be if my Dom is happy I am happy. Second you have to be sure you are getting the whole package.

There was a conversation about training but you enter the relationship and nothing changes. The only thing that has changed is he is barking out orders and he likes to beat you.  This is where communication comes in you should and have the right to ask questions, you have the right to get answers. If you ask a question and you get yelled and it happens on a regular basis then maybe you need to rethink you’re situation. Never I mean never let feelings get in the way of happiness that will fuck you up every time.

You have to be truthful from the start , if you tell the Dom you love being fucked up the ass and when it comes time and you freak out it will not be good. Honest you have to be honest and not honest just to please.

The Dominant has to be honest , once rules are giving out they are set in stone. Down the road a Dom may revisit the rules and maybe there is one he feels you  do not need any longer. Once rules are in place a Dominant will not change just because he wants to punish you. The truth is a Submissive or Slave will strive to be the best they can be. Mistakes do happen I know this and so do other Dominants.  If a Dominant has enough protocols in place very few rules are needed if any. Protocols are the driving force of structure.

When you first meet a Dominant you meet on you’re terms and you’re terms only , you can even go as far as picking the place somewhere on public. You pick what you are going to wear and how you will address him. Many will demand that you call them Sir. That right is earned after you have full respect for them and not until. Submission is earned not giving. Most Doms who have no clue will try to give you a collar. This shows the fuck is a total idiot and nothing more. The collar is picked up from a pet store or walmart and is just tossed across the table and you are told to put it on, you are now owned lets start you’re training.

I have had failed relationships some I did not care about others I lost sight of direction, or I was stumped and had no idea which way to go. I knew what I wanted and needed but had no idea how to get there. I could picture the type of relationship I wanted but was stuck in first gear. Most relationships at that time were just a matter of convenience. I had pussy on a daily basis and someone to suck my cock. I knew going in it would not last and would only be around until I got bored or she got to clingy.

A dominant is not born over night , it is not something you just wake up one morning and say hey I want a submissive. There is growth , the wisdom, learning to control the anger , and finding ways to divert the anger to funnel it out of your system. Learning words are far worse than being physical. Bruises go away words do not, not that I condone being physical no man should ever hit a woman out of anger.

Observation , asking questions , thousands of questions , Observing , learning , communication , learning how the submissive thinks learning what they think the way they do. Learning their habits , their needs, their wants. Tv , music, hobbies, reading the submissive like a book. Once you have that down you can begin their training. Training that will be effective , training that will benefit both.

You Guys , you Dominants , Masters you can have anything you want , you can have anything you need, you can have anything you have ever dreamed of, it just takes a little effort on your behalf. You have to be willing to put as much time into building the relationship as you want out of it. One thing you cannot take more than you give, if you do it will never work..

Good Info. http://bestslavetraining.com/

 

 

Lets Play Chess

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, Chess, Dominant, Slave, Submissive, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on August 23, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Our relationship is much like a game of chess. We think each and every move, and the wrong move could bring great hardship.

We as Dominants are the King our Slave or Submissive , both are the Queen. If you are a single Dominant this is something to think about. Once in a relationship we now have the Queen, the Queen should be our main focus we should do what we need to do to protect. Okay maybe this may not be totally true in the Game because the King is the weakest, only being able to move one way and one block at a time, but it is more about the strategy , the thinking before we make that move. As the king we have to be able to control our every move and know there are consequences to each move.

Life is a Chess game every move we make can affect us good or bad.

When it comes to training it is almost like setting up the board , you sit back and think about your first move..

Several months ago a Dom contacted me wanting advice , my first words were you need a plan , you need a goal, you have to know what direction you need to go , not want.

Your Chess game must benefit both not just one, because if you try to play both sides alone there is no clear winner.

Vile

New Dominant

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, codependent, commitment, communication, compatibility, Dominant, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, New Dominant, Slave, Structure, Submission, Submissive, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on August 2, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/submissive

submissiveinclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others or showing such inclination; “submissive servants”; “a submissive reply”; “replacing troublemakers with more submissive people”

unassertiveinclined to timidity or lack of self-confidence; “a shy unassertive person”
obedientdutifully complying with the commands or instructions of those in authority; “an obedient soldier”; “obedient children”; “a little man obedient to his wife”; “the obedient colonies…are heavily taxed; the refractory remain unburdened”- Edmund Burke
humblemarked by meekness or modesty; not arrogant or prideful; “a humble apology”; “essentially humble…and self-effacing, he achieved the highest formal honors and distinctions”- B.K.Malinowski
subordinatesubject or submissive to authority or the control of another; “a subordinate kingdom”
submissiveabjectly submissive; characteristic of a slave or servant; “slavish devotion to her job ruled her life”; “a slavish yes-man to the party bosses”- S.H.Adams; “she has become submissive and subservient”
It took me some several years to get my feet firmly planted on the ground, it took me several years to figure out who I was and what I needed. It took me several years to figure out exactly what I needed in a partner a long-term partner.
One thing I never understood was the  word compatibility or how important that word would be in my search.
It took me a very long time to realize I had to be me and in order to be me I had to find someone who was okay with me being me, and I had to find someone who wanted to adapt to my ways.
I spent years trying to change people and forcing change never works in the long run , forcing change is only short time. Compatibility is the key word. Someone  who was willing to adapt to my way.
If you are new to the lifestyle , if you are a new Dominant take time find a mentor, a mentor who has life experience , experience in the lifestyle a Dominant who has built a successful D’s or M’s relationship.
If you are serious take a year out of your life and take the time to learn. Listen ,watch and learn.
Just because you meet a submissive it does not mean he or she is the right submissive for you… Compatibility is 90% the other 10% is finding that fit.
You’re  life is about to change , this is why I suggest a year. You are going to add more responsibility to your life , you are going to have to dedicate another 40 hours on top of your full-time job.
She is too emotional,  she is to codependent , she wants rules , she wants protocols , she wants to give up full control,she wants to be trained and you do not have a clue, why you ask? Because you did not take the proper steps. You did not want to invest enough time. You read a book and few post watched some porn and now you are a Self Ordained Bad ass Dominant who knows everything.  well , welcome to a whole new world.
This is where compatibility issues come into play, this is the time you discover if you fit or you just walk away.
There are d’s couples who have none of the above , there are those who have very few rules and protocols. The Dominant speaks the submissive listens. If this is you then find youre fit. Please do not drag someone through your mistakes and the lack of not caring.
She does not listen , she does not follow rules , she does not follow protocols. What have you done to control the above? What steps have you taken ? What have you done as far as Discipline ? If you are going to put a rule or protocol in place you have to enforce it , if you do not your words mean nothing and the submissive will lose respect for you.
As with any relationship we have to invest time , when it comes to a D’s or M’s you can double or even triple the time you will need to invest.
The more the submissive begins to trust the more they will want to give and in turn will come the added responsibility. The bad news is it is never ending,as with training, so be careful what you ask for…
To help you get a step in the door , find a mentor , find a Dominant support group . the chances are there is probably a group close to you even a Dominant to mentor you. Mentorship I would imagine would be at least a year, and i would think a year would be worth a life long relationship.
When I am approached about mentoring , I spend a little time seeing if the new dominant is really serious. The bad news is once i agree it usually only last a couple of weeks then the dominant knows everything and they no longer need my advice.
Remember I am living a successful M’s relationship
Again just because you find a submissive it does not mean she is the right submissive. It also does not mean you are the right dominant.
Vile

My Spirituality And BDSM

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Collar, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Relationships, consequences, Consistency, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, fetlife, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Part Time Dominant, Part Time Submission, Religion, Slave, Submission, Submissive, viledesires62@aol.com on April 1, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

While I may be very outspoken , loud at times , I do have a habit of speaking my mind, in private or public. I am far from politically correct and if I think your bull shitting me I will be the first to call you out.

One obsession I have is speaking with elders , I love their stories of life from the beginning to the present, very wise and most information can be put to very good use. Each story is different , their life is different, some have had a very easy life while others struggled growing up. Some had a good home while other faced abuse on a daily basis.

While in Korea an Elder I met named Kim I would sit for hours and just listen while he spoke in broken English. The stories were very intense. The came the subject of Buddhism which i found very interesting.

Being in the army I could fly most anywhere in the world for about 10.00 dollars and my next stop was Thailand, this was mid 1980 I had just turned 18 and my first taste of the lifestyle.

Although Buddhism is a religion I never looked at it that way , the way I understood it it was a way of life. While at times when I first meet someone I am quick to judge , I try to set aside those feelings and give them a chance but most of the time my gut feeling was right.

I seldom give second chances but there are exceptions at times I am not sure why such as a friend I use to have Daddy M not one but two chances and he proved to be a pig.

I will help others if I see they are doing something to help themselves , if not I decline or I do not even bring it up.

most expect others to just jump in and fix what they have fucked up, remember 90% of our problems are self inflicting , this happens by using bad judgement , and not thinking about the choices and consequences. Trying to cheat the system , trying to get over on someone , be it a friend or even at times family.  I believe today family will fuck you faster and more often than someone you call a friend.

I have said this before I am not against religion I am against organized religion. Organized religion is evil, it is money driven, the poor feed the rich.

Live as you would want to be treated by others and give the same respect.

Today i am not a full practicing Buddhist but I walk with much of the beliefs, I do find time from time to time to meditate. I live a good life and I treat others with respect and I expect the same in return. The only down fall is some take my kindness as a weakness and those who walk into me blind are in a pasture they have never walked.

I can care and have great love for you but that switch can be turned off in a split second and never turned back on, this includes family.

I have nor do I allow drama into our life, I stop it before it becomes poison . The same way I handle problems , I handle before they become a problem.

To have a  successful and growing relationship both have to be honest and upfront , both have to be truthful and able to communicate their needs.

Compatibility is the most important thing when trying to build a relationship. It is okay to give and take on somethings , but if you give on needs it will never work..

The almighty married Dominant who is cheating on his wife. This is no Dom in any way shape or form. His wife wont suck cock or take it up the ass, and not into pain. This is a kink to them and nothing more. They prey on those who are submissive because they believe you are weak and simple minded. They believe you just want to be used and punished.

Your a piece of ass, only able to experience submission when the Dominant can get away from his wife. He comes to your place or you get a room. You suck dick , get your ass beat and your dropped off. Ill text you later..

I get emails all the time and comments as well one just the other day about seeing a married Dom that turned into a disaster , she was able to see she was just being used.

A close friend of mine was seeing a married Dom, why ? I do not have a clue. He could only go out when he had something to do, other than that he was stuck home with wifey.

So he moved and the relationship ended or so she thought, when he sent her a text she politely turned him down and all of a sudden he had found someone younger and told her to go fuck herself.

A few months later another text. Want to Fuck ? She did not reply and the text continued, so I decided to send him an email on fetlife. He would not answer me , but continued to text her and tell her how weak she was followed by the names again. I sent him a total of 8 emails , shrugs. I even invited him to a local function , but that went unanswered …..

I would think as a submissive or slave while in a relationship you would want the whole pie and not just a slice. I would think you would want to be treated with respect. I would think you would want to be cared for. I would think you would want to be more than a piece of ass. I would think you would want to experience the training process, the experience of earning your collar.  Maybe I am wrong ?

My way is not the only way , but i do have a proven formula that I have put together and used and in my relationship it works, and it works well. I trained to fit my needs , I trained to help arianna , I trained so that she could achieve goals, and Ive supported her. Being supportive plays a huge role , just as communication.

As always i got off track a little, but if you follow you know this already. I love sharing my life , I love sharing my growth when it comes to the lifestyle…

Much love

Vile

 

BDSM Relationships Move So Fast

Posted in Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM Abuse, BDSM Relationships, cock sucking, communication, control, controlling, Dominance, Dominant, Humiliation, Master, Meeting a new Dominant, Passwords, Slave, Submissive, sucking dick, Total Solitude, Verbal abuse, viledesires62@aol.com on March 6, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Your traditional dating is pretty simple, you meet , talk go out spend time with each other. You go out to eat the movies , parks, kissing making out a little foreplay. You know this things tend to move slowly , both of you are on your best behavior trying to convince each other your the perfect fit.. If it works out it does if it does not oh well.

Then we cross the tracks , the other side of the world a new world unknown to most, something with a dark side , but in a way it is exciting.

Your train of thought changes as a female , you have not yet figured out where you fit in, all you know is what you have read really gets you going.

Now all train of thought is no longer rational , your not thinking clear, your brain is moving at Mach one and as of this moment what you have read , what you have chatted about in chat rooms, and maybe some small talk with women at work or maybe your to ashamed to bring it up.

Your Hormones have just kicked into high gear, all of a sudden you need BDSM in your life this is what you have been missing in your life…

You meet a Dom or Master in a chat room , maybe a Daddy Dom. You now let a complete stranger dictate who and what you are and the way words are put you may not fully understand but you go along with what your being told. He gives little hints using key words you pick up on.

Unlike the traditional dating 20 minutes into the chat , your asked what your limits are ? Limits what the fuck is that? Ahhhh your not sure so he begins to explain feeding you more. The next question is are you Bi ? That is always the first question, the second is do you swallow, do you take it up the ass? Do you enjoy pain? Do you enjoy humiliation ? What is the shortest skirt you own ? What are the shortest shorts you own? Do you go out in public without a Bra? How often do you Masturbate ?

If your not lock then comes the webcam , or kik then talking on the phone leading up to phone sex.

Here is what really gets me is the self punishment , making you punish yourself, spanking your pussy , putting clothes pins on your nipple and clit. Then the name calling starts and you go along with it because you do not know any better. The isolation kicks in keeping you away from friends and family. Your passwords and in most cases your banking information. I have seen a few get completely wiped out, and left with nothing.

If your local and you meet you are to wear a skirt or dress with no panties which I have never figured out. Once you meet about twenty minutes into the conversation he wants to start your training, you either get a room or if your dumb enough you take a complete stranger back to your home.

Then the cock sucking training begins , he blows his load down your throat pats you on your head and tells you to wait on his text..

All of the above happens in a matter of days not weeks or months, days and at times a day.

You are experiencing mass confusion your mind is stuck in neutral and you feel you have no where to turn. On the other hand you are taking the word of one person, then one who claims he can lead you down the right path, the one word you hear is Trust, trust me.

Your going to make mistakes , your going to make more than one , more than two or three and you will continue until you get your head straight.

Everything becomes a chore nothing is now fun, you dread seeing your Dom but at that moment and time he is the only one in your life.

All of the above has to do with your Hormones , and nothing more until your able to take a grasp on things.

The process is not as bad as you think it is, thinking through things is the difficult part..

Vile

 

 

 

Mastering The Master

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave training, BDSM TPE Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, choices and consequences, commitment, communication, consequences, Consistency, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, Dominants, emotional, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, MAsT Kissimmee Florida, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Masters And Slaves Together, Mental BDSM, positive reinforcement, relationships, Submission, Submissive, Total Power Exchange, Training Arianna, training your slave, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , , , , , , , , on February 29, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

As much as I would like to think I am not perfect, although many would disagree with that statement. Most who know me think I am loud , very out spoken and at times obnoxious.

On the way to a local coffee group which all the people whoa attend are awesome , a good get together at a local star bucks then at times dinner after. I work from home as most know and come my Friday I need to get out I need that interaction with like minded people.

On our way the group leader was warning new comers of my arrival. I am warning you ahead of time Vile is unfiltered. Unfiltered I never looked at it that way , I simply say what is on my mind be it serious or joking…

Some months ago I received and email from a woman who said my blog was the most disgusting place she had ever visited and i should be shut down. So sitting back I am thinking if you find it that bad, why did you spend time reading it and then making time out of your busy life to email me?

Out in the world I like to have fun , I like to joke around , I enjoy making others laugh, but mostly I love learning how others live our wild lifestyle. I listen , I observe and I take in just like a hard drive on a computer.

I have come a long way in the past twenty five years or so and I am making plans for the next twenty five. I have grown on so many levels , I have set goals , I have made most of my goals and I continue to march forward.

My MAsT Chapter has been approved, Masters And Slaves Together. It was not an easy task and it was about a 13 month process.

Over the years I made mistakes, some were a mistake and at times things I did was because I could, I am me , I will stay me and I will walk my own path , but most of all I will not live a life where I have to be politically correct , my life is on my time and my time only.

I am positive , very optimistic , even if I have negative thoughts I keep them to myself. Everything I do has a plan and I seldom make a mistake but if I do I admit it, after all I can be wrong.

I am in control, I am control of my everyday life, my home and in most cases my job. I run my house , I am in full control, but with all of these choices comes consequences.

Mastering the Master is a long path and it is not an easy road to walk. You have to define who and what you are, you have to define where you are and where you want to be, you have to define the type of relationship you want, but most of all you have to define the type of partner you need in your life, not want but need, a want is nothing a want has no meaning and at times a want can be destructive and childish. I concentrate on my needs if my needs are met there are no wants.

When I first met Arianna I made a promise and a commitment , I told her I will never raise my voice towards her or call her names out of anger and some 3 years later this still holds true. Being in control was a strong need to me , being able to not only listen but being able to communicate in a clear and understanding voice. Saying what I mean and mean what I say , not only saying what I will do but do the things I said I would.

Some say it is healthy to argue and while I may agree a little it depends on how you agree to argue. Bruises heal words cut deeper bruises hurt but words effect someone on a very deep mental state and while one can forgive one will never forget The more you hurt with your words the more you are in danger of losing what you have.

If you are fighting with yours Slave or submissive if you had any type of training then you as a Master needs to sit back and maybe come up with a different approach.

MASTER / SLAVE

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

No where in the above definition does it mention a Master Arguing with their Slave. No where in the statement above does it mention a Master Losing control.

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship.

If you the Master argues with your Slave not submissive but your Slave who is the bitch in the relationship ?

When entering a M/s relationship , a power exchange relationship or a Total power exchange you the Master are taking on a huge responsibility. You need to have a clear plan and a training program in place and a training program that puts you in the lead but more important one who will follow and have the need to follow.

Training someone takes a great deal of thought , every submissive or Slave has a different thought process, different habits and react in different ways . Some are emotional , some may suffer from some type of depression , some may suffer from anxiety the list goes on and on, so what worked in your last relationship surely will not work in your next , that includes training and rules..

I think a lot of the misunderstanding comes from someone who is new to the lifestyle and just jumps in head first and not really having a clue… Waking up one morning and your a Master because of a blog or a porn site you ran across. We as humans are visual and you google BDSM and click images and there is your definition.

Mastering the Master , Mastering communication , Mastering honesty , Mastering commitment, Mastering your devotion , Mastering your understanding of ones needs , Mastering your loyalty , Mastering your consistency , your training but most of all your continued growth.

Each and everyday I work on most of those , not only daily but hourly . I work to maintain what I and we have. I want us as Master and Slave to continue to grow.

The out come is you end up with a best friend , partner , and Slave.

 

Vile

 

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, A Slave Is High Maintenance, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Rules, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Collar, Collared Slave, commitment, communication, compatibility, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, Dominant, emotional, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Inservice Slave, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Mental BDSM, Micromanagement, positive reinforcement, Private Protocol, Protocol public, Protocols, Punishment, Slave, Slave Owned Property, Submission, submissive, TPE, Training Arianna, Vile Woods on FaceBook, viledesires62@aol.com on February 22, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

I never pressured Arianna to call me Sir or Master , I waited because such an honor is clearly earned.

I loved the steps I took in building a relationship, I loved watching the relationship grow, but I also knew in order for it to be successful I had to be who and what I was.

I wanted Arianna to ask , and I waited for that question. Will you be my Master, I knew then I was on the right path.

Although we spoke of training and what our goals were , yes hers and mine , I did not go into any great detail and only answering questions when they were asked.

By earning ones respect you get so much more than trying to demand submission. You can demand submission but your not getting the whole picture nor are you entering a true relationship with any meaning.

A slave is not weak a slave is strong in mind body and soul, however a Slave does have different needs and goals, along with a different type of structure.

I had a strict 90 day plan in hand and I began training without a word. The one thing that made me stop and think was there was absolutely no resistance this was something I had never experienced. Today our relationship requires only daily maintenance , as with any other relationships just on a different level.

There are many definitions today when we try to define a D’s or M’s relationship we are all different and we have different needs.

Although Arianna may be my wife, best friend and partner she is property first, she wears a collar 24/7 that shows my ownership, I can proudly say it has been over 3 years she she has been collard and it has not been off one time. She wears her collar proudly and yes this includes work. Before entering a relationship that was a strict requirement of mine.

Many today do not take the collar serious , it is worn during play , when out to local functions, or when company comes over that is the only time it has any real meaning. If that is your lifestyle that is fine it fits you…

Although we train and we train to fit our needs  , we also have to take the slave into consideration. We need to set goals, we need to insure our property fully understands what is about to happen. We need to insure their needs are met on all levels, many would like to think it is a one way street but that is so far from the truth.

I myself take the collar very serious , it is a sign of ownership, it is a sign of devotion, it is a sign of submission, again do not take this wrong this is only my opinion.

Master/slave

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Respecting ones limits be it physically or mentally , knowing the limitations , knowing just how far you can go and still remain in control. Fixing problems before they become problems.

The feeling of security , the feeling of being wanted , the feeling of being needed, but most of all the feeling of being able to trust and respect.

In the beginning when the relationship is defined , what is expected , the rules and protocols, once everything is in place we as Masters cannot change things up a year later, many times going back on your word can be a deal breaker. There are times when something may need to be changed but I feel it needs to be explained in detail how it would benefit the home.

Training is changing the thought process , training is changing habit and replacing them. If you sit and think if done right you can create the perfect partner, that is the easy part , the hard part comes with maintaining it.

The training would include verbal , physical , mental, emotional , and at times rituals this is where structure comes into place. In my Master , slave or Owner , Property structure plays a huge part as with rituals , rituals become rules, protocols become rules.

Although I do feel punishment is needed that is not my main focus, I do not sit around and wait on Arianna to break a rule, she knows when she breaks a rule, which I can say has only happened once in 3.5 years. Positive reinforcement and communication plays a huge roll in any relationship.

Breaking someone to the point of feeling worthless , constant humiliation , abuse mental and physical , remember if you break it you have to fix it. I am more than sure the end result is not something you would want in a lifetime partner.

Training comes in a few different areas , be it service , sexual,  how to speak in public what to wear , how to talk , how to communicate with people or who not to communicate, who to hug or who you shake hands with ,how much do you want to control? We live a Owner Property relationship , a consensual relationship , consensual being the key word. Make no mistake I run and control everything in my home.

Just make sure who ever you are considering make sure they have your best interest in mind..