Archive for the Dominants Category

Eye Restrictions And Why I have Changed My Mind

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave training, Dominants, Eye Restrictions, Rules, Slave, Submission, submissive, Train your slave with tags , , , , on January 7, 2018 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have a disagreement about eye restrictions when a Dom first meets a submissive , I myself believe eye contact means everything when getting to know each other because the eyes tell everything.

Control the mind and you control everything else , being able to get in someones head and fully understanding what makes someone think the way they do, why they do the things they do , you are able to understand their habits and change habits.

After training , the initial part of training because training is on going it never stops. Throughout the relationship the Dominant must make changes , maybe small changes or maybe drastic. Many times I make changes and neither Arianna or Lynn are even aware I have made changes. It is to easy to get into a routine and the relationship becomes stagnate its going nowhere.

Sub-space many think sub-space happens only during play but in fact sub-space happens on a daily basis , minute by minute and hour by hour. This happens with rules and protocols. Having enough protocols through out the day , changing habits , the way one thinks all keep the submissive in some sort of sub-space. Rules are put in place to make improvements of ones life. A new protocol I have put in place is before Arianna sits she stands at parade rest and she makes the request to sit , this is not a rule it is a protocol , public or private. I am keeping that level of sub-space.

Eye contact restrictions refer to a popular protocol within BDSM play whereby the submissive is not permitted to look at a dominant directly in the eye.

This is done as a general may of emphasizing hierarchy in the relationship but is also used as a tool for humiliation, with the idea being that the submissive is not worthy of looking in the eye of the superior dominant.

This practice is a mainly psychological activity.

Eye contact restriction is commonly maintained through the submissive having to look at the floor, with transgressions normally punished through punishments such as face slapping. In other cases eye contact restriction can actually be enforced through the use of blindfolds.

Most of the above I disagree with , it has nothing to do with Humiliation unless the submissive sees it that way. A Hierarchy yes in any D’s or M’s relationship there has to be a Hierarchy. The practice is psychological it is maintaining that sub-space because every time one speaks they are reminded of who they are and what their position is in the relationship.

Not being worthy I disagree with that statement as well , the submissive or slave is more than worthy after all they are the ones who keeps the house together. They are the ones who makes sure everything runs smoothly. They are the ones who do most of the planning. In my case Arianna does all of the above including taking care of the funds of the house keeping everything balanced , insuring everything is paid and some goes into savings. Arianna and Lynn both plan meals , clean and do chores that were assigned to them so the word worthy needs to be scratched off.

Keeping that level of sub-space , keeping one in that frame of mind and keeping one thinking.  At times I will add different protocols , one I have recently added is when we are out the girls will stand with their arms down in front with hands clasped. When my girls are out they both look like a million dollars , why? One because I care and two they both represent me. How they dress , how they talk , how they sit is all a representation of me. How they both act shows the amount of training I have provided and it shows their loyalty.

Humiliation there are at times I will use some form of humiliation nothing to extreme , but it is to remind them of who they are and what their place is within the home. Remember you can get into that routine rut and again you the Dominant needs to change things up.

So my thoughts on eye restriction , keeping one humble , a simple reminder of ones place.

My way of thinking is if you implement eye restrictions , there has to be a time when your property is allowed to look at you eye to eye. At dinner for instance this is what is called free time to speak. There are no cell phones and most of the time the TV is turned down but from this moment forward the TV will be off. At dinner I address each asking if anything is on their mind? This is total free time to be able to address anything be it good or bad. This is the time to clear the chest , clear thoughts or concerns. At the end of the day I can only make a informed decision based on the information provided. If you did not provide the information or enough or even correct information and I make a bad decision it then falls on my girls not I.

Eye restrictions is something I am still up in the air on , I am giving it a great deal of thought. Once I implement something I seldom change it..



Anal Sex And Submission

Posted in anal sex, Arianna, ass fucking, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, communication, Dominants, Slave, Submission, Submissive with tags , , , , on January 6, 2018 by thekinkyworldofvile

There is just something about Anal sex. To me the ass is the most intimate part of the female body.

Bondage , restricting the movement of the body , face down on the bed , lubing a finger and sliding in the ass , then pulling out adding more lube then sliding two fingers in slowly stretching getting it ready.

I am a huge fan of ATM , its almost a fetish but a real need when it comes to submission , there is something about ATM that is taboo. Being something so intimate to me its just not with anyone. In order for me to have sex with someone I have to have a connection , a deep connection. I suppose as we age our thought process changes or maybe not , maybe its just my way of thinking..  There are some dogs out there , men and women who just have that fuck thing going in over drive, but I wonder if they are truly happy or just fulfilling that moment. Then going home alone with a cold empty feeling. We as humans have that need for companionship , then need to be close to someone.  We have that need to be needed even when entering a relationship knowing it will not work, it is for that moment.

Bondage , tight bondage is the ultimate aphrodisiac it puts the submissive in a mindset of being helpless. Gagged and hood adds more , when you take away one or more senses away it causes a type of confusion.

Sex today it seems different , I have talked to some and it seems sex has no meaning. Sex is just a act of physical contact with no feelings or emotions. I wonder how someone could be in a relationship and it last with thoughts like that in ones mind?

I can no longer use the word making love , nor can I have that genital touch although at times I do try and I try , I try because in my mind it is needed , or that is my way of thinking. Just like getting head most of the time I love that slow gentle touch but at times I just have the need to grab her head and just start fucking her mouth.

We all look at sex in different ways , we think different and some consider sex as being meaningless. Sex just being a act with no emotions.

I find my slave when giving head as submission , but anal sex is more intimate to me because I feel it is something or the most private part of the female body.

One of my first questions when I meet someone this is after getting to know the potential partner is how she feels about anal sex? The word no ends the conversation , why? Although sex should not be based off of sex , sex does play a huge role. If you are male or female and you give into a need there will be sometime down the road when it will come up again. Making sure your needs are met is a must and if you give in then down the road you will not be happy.

A sadist meeting a submissive who cannot even stand to wear nipple clamps well do you think the relationship would last? Not it would crumble within weeks because a sadist has the need to inflict pain , inflicting pain is the way the sadist gets off. There are not many sadist who are Dominants , nor are there many Dominants who are true sadist.

Anal sex if done right can be pleasurable for both , the building up , the foreplay , taking your time , not just bending over and shoving your cock up her ass. I myself are guilty of that at times because 99% of the time the sex is about me and me only , I just want to get off and go about my business. This was all negotiated prior to entering our relationship so there were no surprises.

Some Dominants and those who are submissive may not have any interest in anal sex , there are those who are dominant I have talked to have no interest in anal sex because they felt it was dirty , and many of those who made the comments felt the same way about eating pussy. Some even said eating pussy was to submissive or it was a submissive act by a Dominant. I am not sure where those thoughts come from but to each their own I suppose.

In the past I settled for part time submission while I was trying to be a full time Dominant and it does not work. Why should I give 100% and a slave only give 50% or less? Why should I give all and not get my needs met or why should I meet needs while mine are not being met?

I cannot stress enough on how important it is to truly know each other before entering a full blown relationship , then sitting down and expressing each others needs and making sure they are going to be met. It takes very little time to sit down and talk.

You only have one life to play with , why not play it with the ball in your court?


You Want The Pussy But Not The Responsibulity

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, anal sex, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, codependent, commitment, communication, Dominants,, Protocols, pussy, Slave, Structure, submisive, Submission, sucking cock with tags , , , , , , on February 19, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

There are idiots everywhere , and there are people who think with their Cocks as a matter of fact their cocks run their life. If you were to cut the mother fucker off they would be lost.

Why do most people associate BDSM with abuse ? Because of the above the idiots , the retards who want the pussy but not the responsibility.

Those who play the game , those who hurt people because they have no clue, just take out a flogger and start swinging without a care. Those who rape because you think they want to be forced. Those who see Submission as a weakness. Those who want the control but give nothing back.

I have zero respect for those Married Doms or claim to be Dominant. Think about it if they were so Dominant they would be running their house , but that is not the case their wife better known as Mommy take care of them.

Something I hate some stupid fuck makes a comment and leaves no way to contact them or respond to my reply.


There are still core behaviors consistent to all humans. While everyone is an individual, they still share humanity’s foils.
Where is the line between domination and abuse? Are those interchangeable terms? When does the master/submissive/slave relationship change from positive to negative? In-fact what constitutes a positive relationship?
This fuck has not a clue about the lifestyle but has read enough to know there are millions of fucking retards who are predators , those who abuse.
I have blogged about Married Doms probably 50 times or more out of almost 3000 post and not one , not one has stood up and said a word or justified his reasoning .
You who are submissive seeing married Doms and that is cool as long as you know he will never divorce Mommy. He is with you because his wife will not take it up the ass but you will. The minute you become needy he will drop you like a bad habit.
If and when a Dominant takes that step into a brand new world your life changes , it is like hitting puberty all over again. Your thought process changes , your needs change , your wants change, and the type of woman you are looking for changes.
It is like starting elementary , stepping up to middle school then high school , you never stop learning.
I watch , I listen and I observe. I never want to stop learning each day is a new experience . You learn by others mistakes , you learn by thinking before you act , you learn by thinking logically, you learn by taking responsibility for your own actions, You learn by knowing your decision affects two and just not one.
The main problem with a new Dominant is he kinda knows what he wants , he has envisioned the role , the things he wants to do , but his thoughts are purely sexual. He has not sat down and thought the whole process out. His rules are sexual , demeaning , humiliating , rough and thoughtless. He has not thought through the emotions that will come out , nor the neediness , and in some cases the codependency side of the submissive. While thinking about having a slave non of the above has come to his thoughts. The Dominant will become defensive , he will start losing his temper pushing you away , calling you names, then comes the end he explains you are not the one for him.
One of the first things I tell a new Dominant is to find a mentor 1 out of a 100 will take that advice and 1 out of a 100 will succeed. The other 99 will put the blame on the slave because she was not a true slave , her submission was fake.
These guys fail because of a lack of knowledge and a lack of caring. These guys will move from slave to slave to slave and he will find something wrong with each one because he is not willing to put the effort into building a relationship. These guys are only interested in getting their cock sucked , fucking someones ass , just using until she is no longer fun or he just gets bored.
Building a M’s or D’s relationship is not an easy task if you are serious and have a plan. Before handing out any rules you have to know the Slave inside and out. You have to know what makes her think the way she does. Again this takes the want , this takes effort and this takes a need.
As young Dominants we all had the same thoughts when it came to rules . You will never wear panties , you will always wear a skirt, you will worship Master Cock, you will be ready for inspection at all times, your pussy must be shaved at all times , your ass will be ready at all times. Then we hit the Dominant Puberty stage and our thoughts change..
The truth is with a little planning , a little need , a little caring both can have the ultimate relationship but both have to have the need. The Slave the need to submit and serve , the Dominant the need to take control and responsibility.
I run a very smooth home , there are no problems , there is no Drama but most of all there is no arguing. I have more protocols than I do rules , as a matter of fact you can turn your protocols into rules. Rules are meant for self improvement , rules are meant to keep your slave on a straight path. Both rules and protocols are to be followed and it is the Dominants responsibility to insure the Slave follows and he has to let the Slave know there are consequences if a rule or protocol is not followed. In public a Slave is a direct reflection of her owner.
You want sex on demand , you want your cock sucked on demand, you want anal sex on demand. You want everything on demand but you have to give back more than you take. You have to be willing to take the good and bad. You have to be willing to stay consistent on a daily basis. You have to be willing to communicate and listen. You have to be willing to talk to your Slave and not at her.
The question that comes to mind is , is there a such a thing as a perfect Slave ?  Absolutely there is and we The Masters create that perfect slave we mold to fit our needs and wants. We as Masters create our own world , have have the ability to control our life , our surroundings , and even out in public. If you are going to talk you have to be able to walk the talk,,, Hmmmm did that come out right?

I Am Still Around

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Triad, Dominants, FaceBook Vile Woods,, Sister Slaves, Slave, Submission, Submissive with tags , , , , on October 2, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

What a fucking month it has been insane , long hours at work yes I do have a everyday normal life well somewhat.

To add as I have spoken about in the past we are adding a third to our home, as a matter of fact we just had a two week time trial period and it went very well.

The Triad has been in the works now for about 6 months and I have been taking it slow. When bringing someone into your home you want to make sure everything is a perfect fit.

My next blog coming up is a topic that was brought to my attention by a very good friend. I introduced two a New Dominant and a Submissive somewhat new to the lifestyle.

As we sit in my car the question that really got me thinking was. What Does She Get Out Of It? That is deep and a lot of work , a lot of thinking, a lot of dedication.  That is the first time in my 53 years years on this earth , my first time in 25 years years in the lifestyle that any Dominant has ever posed that question, this told me one thing he cares and wants to succeed,. There is a age difference and he was thinking with him being older what can she possibly get out of the relationship.

As always I want to thank all of you for stopping by, please feel free to email, I have a few I need to catch up on but I will answer….

The Pic I have a ass fetish

Check out my slaves wordpress as well.




BDSM And Discipline

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Abuse, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave, BDSM Structure, Building a BDSM Relationshp, communication, consequences, Consistency, controlling, Discipline, Dominant and Submissive, Dominants, Ego, fucking and sucking,, Humiliation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Protocols, punish, Punishment, Slave, Structure, Submission, training your slave, Training your submissive, with tags , , , , , , , , , on March 25, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Discipline is something I do not look forward to nor do I set back and hope a rule will be broken. That takes way to much time and causes one to walk on egg shells….

My observation in the lifestyle most Discipline or punishment is in a  physical form and consist of pain and leaving black and blue marks , how ever I believe something that is looked over when others speak of being punished is aftercare.

Being punished the different forms , the main of course which is most commonly used is physical, which I have used in the past , but my way of thinking if a rule or protocol is broken 99% of the time it was a mistake. So I sit down and talk so I can find out what happened. Did something come up , or was it forgotten? The next question is what can be done to prevent it from happening again , what steps are going to be taking to make sure it does not happen again?

Some different ways besides physical , would be verbal , talking and seeing what happened.  taking something away , taking a privilege away , confinement, you get the idea. Beating someone is not always the answer although if you read enough blogs or talk with others this seems to be the trend today.

If a submissive or slave is breaking rules on a daily basis there is a problem, a lack of attention or maybe the training.

I met a Baby girl at a local function I know the Dom well, and while outside I could hear the displeasure in her voice. She had just moved from Main down to Florida and the end result was not good he ended up putting her out on the street.

A friend of mine sent me a text and asked me to call him so we could figure out what happened and what we could do. We did find her a place to stay but she had already made arrangements to fly home with the help of her parents.

Why was it her fault ? Number one she did not do her homework , she did not Vet him prior to moving down meaning she did not contact anyone to see if he was who he said he was, as it turned out he was not.. She took his word on everything , only to sell everything she owned moved and found out soon afterward everything was a lie.

I tried to reach out to him after she contacted me and asked why he was kicking her out? He just stated she was not for him, and when I asked if he was just going to put her out his answer was yes.

The texting was going good until I asked him what steps he had taken in training her , and the conversation went dead. This just proved he had no clue, nor did he care about putting the work into the relationship to make it work.

I think when it comes to our lifestyle Discipline in someways are over played , many see discipline as a daily ritual , see it as needed in order to be in a relationship.

Just a few and the first and most popular is the physical part the spanking, the beating, the leaving bruises as a reminder a show of Authority showing who is in charge.

Self punishment which I always found funny, that is something I never took part in and I find it to be Ego driven and someone who is full of their own shit.

Taking a privilege away something the submissive or slave enjoys, be it TV , a girls night out, their ipad something one cherishes. Free time giving during the day , down time, I have found this to be very effective.

Then talking , communication sitting down one on one and find out what happened , why was a rule broken ? There are times when it cant be helped, and at times things need to be looked over.

As Dominants you spend so much of your time building an awesome relationship why would one take the time to beat someone so precious, someone who is suppose to mean the world to you.

Those who do not have a clue spend much of their time talking down to the sub or slave, degrading and humiliating. This is to keep someone at a very low self esteem, and unless they are able to communicate with others, they do not know any better..

Mastering The Master

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave training, BDSM TPE Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, choices and consequences, commitment, communication, consequences, Consistency, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, Dominants, emotional,, MAsT Kissimmee Florida, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Masters And Slaves Together, Mental BDSM, positive reinforcement, relationships, Submission, Submissive, Total Power Exchange, Training Arianna, training your slave, with tags , , , , , , , , , , on February 29, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

As much as I would like to think I am not perfect, although many would disagree with that statement. Most who know me think I am loud , very out spoken and at times obnoxious.

On the way to a local coffee group which all the people whoa attend are awesome , a good get together at a local star bucks then at times dinner after. I work from home as most know and come my Friday I need to get out I need that interaction with like minded people.

On our way the group leader was warning new comers of my arrival. I am warning you ahead of time Vile is unfiltered. Unfiltered I never looked at it that way , I simply say what is on my mind be it serious or joking…

Some months ago I received and email from a woman who said my blog was the most disgusting place she had ever visited and i should be shut down. So sitting back I am thinking if you find it that bad, why did you spend time reading it and then making time out of your busy life to email me?

Out in the world I like to have fun , I like to joke around , I enjoy making others laugh, but mostly I love learning how others live our wild lifestyle. I listen , I observe and I take in just like a hard drive on a computer.

I have come a long way in the past twenty five years or so and I am making plans for the next twenty five. I have grown on so many levels , I have set goals , I have made most of my goals and I continue to march forward.

My MAsT Chapter has been approved, Masters And Slaves Together. It was not an easy task and it was about a 13 month process.

Over the years I made mistakes, some were a mistake and at times things I did was because I could, I am me , I will stay me and I will walk my own path , but most of all I will not live a life where I have to be politically correct , my life is on my time and my time only.

I am positive , very optimistic , even if I have negative thoughts I keep them to myself. Everything I do has a plan and I seldom make a mistake but if I do I admit it, after all I can be wrong.

I am in control, I am control of my everyday life, my home and in most cases my job. I run my house , I am in full control, but with all of these choices comes consequences.

Mastering the Master is a long path and it is not an easy road to walk. You have to define who and what you are, you have to define where you are and where you want to be, you have to define the type of relationship you want, but most of all you have to define the type of partner you need in your life, not want but need, a want is nothing a want has no meaning and at times a want can be destructive and childish. I concentrate on my needs if my needs are met there are no wants.

When I first met Arianna I made a promise and a commitment , I told her I will never raise my voice towards her or call her names out of anger and some 3 years later this still holds true. Being in control was a strong need to me , being able to not only listen but being able to communicate in a clear and understanding voice. Saying what I mean and mean what I say , not only saying what I will do but do the things I said I would.

Some say it is healthy to argue and while I may agree a little it depends on how you agree to argue. Bruises heal words cut deeper bruises hurt but words effect someone on a very deep mental state and while one can forgive one will never forget The more you hurt with your words the more you are in danger of losing what you have.

If you are fighting with yours Slave or submissive if you had any type of training then you as a Master needs to sit back and maybe come up with a different approach.


From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

No where in the above definition does it mention a Master Arguing with their Slave. No where in the statement above does it mention a Master Losing control.

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship.

If you the Master argues with your Slave not submissive but your Slave who is the bitch in the relationship ?

When entering a M/s relationship , a power exchange relationship or a Total power exchange you the Master are taking on a huge responsibility. You need to have a clear plan and a training program in place and a training program that puts you in the lead but more important one who will follow and have the need to follow.

Training someone takes a great deal of thought , every submissive or Slave has a different thought process, different habits and react in different ways . Some are emotional , some may suffer from some type of depression , some may suffer from anxiety the list goes on and on, so what worked in your last relationship surely will not work in your next , that includes training and rules..

I think a lot of the misunderstanding comes from someone who is new to the lifestyle and just jumps in head first and not really having a clue… Waking up one morning and your a Master because of a blog or a porn site you ran across. We as humans are visual and you google BDSM and click images and there is your definition.

Mastering the Master , Mastering communication , Mastering honesty , Mastering commitment, Mastering your devotion , Mastering your understanding of ones needs , Mastering your loyalty , Mastering your consistency , your training but most of all your continued growth.

Each and everyday I work on most of those , not only daily but hourly . I work to maintain what I and we have. I want us as Master and Slave to continue to grow.

The out come is you end up with a best friend , partner , and Slave.




Giving Up Control

Posted in Arianna, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, BDSM 24/7, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Structure, BDSM TPE Relationships, commitment, communication, Consistency, consistent, Dominants,, Manipulation, Married Dominant, Master and slave relationship, Part Time Dominant, Protocols, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission, TPE, with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 9, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

My favorite new question is , What Are You Going To Do With Your One And Only Life.


Giving up control is a huge step, it is a step that should be given much thought , and the one deciding factor is how much control do you want to relinquish.

Once you have decided everything it is time to look for the right Dominant. Dominants come in many different flavors. Some are gentle and not so strict, some are very strict. Some enjoy inflicting pain while others do not, some punish while others do not and yes some even lie and I am going to give a very good example….

Giving up control is no easy task, the one thing you have to look at when speaking with a new Dominant is if your going to be able to comply with his demands, his rules and so on. This is not a decision that should be made at the time you are talking about everything, this is something you should mull over……

When talking to the new Dom you need to know what questions to ask, is he a 24/7 Dominant , or is he just a bedroom Dominant ? Is he just into the pain side of things ? Questions are important because if you do not ask you could find yourself in a bad situation.

Training your Baby Girl your submissive or your slave is actually a form of behavior Modification , I have spoken about this before. Changing ones thought process, habits, dress, talk, walk everything. When I was younger I did not really understand the process , nor did I care I found it to be much more work than I was willing to take part in.

It is possible for a D’s relationship to just fall into place with no formal training at all… You have to find your own fit, your own kink, your needs.

My check list , we all need a check list when we are looking for a partner in the lifestyle, I have spoken about this before. Once you put it on paper it should be LAW.

I did however change my stance on the type of relationship I was willing to enter, but as far as my needs I did not bend.  Arianna explained she needed a Micromanaged relationship, someone who could keep her in check, keep things flowing in the right direction.

Living a D’s or M’s lifestyle is different for each, the definition is different, I get it. Everyone should be happy and be in that place, that comfort zone , the feeling of security.

I am far from insecure but I do need that feeling of security, I need that closeness , the communication, and yes the control. I want to control my world and my surroundings. I keep everything in check.

My list I showed when meeting prospective slaves was not really that long, but to some it was not attainable. When explaining my list if the word NO or I cant came up , it was simple the conversation was over , I refused to bend because if I did I knew down the road I would not be happy..

There were things I was looking for in a slave, there were specific things I was looking for. It really had nothing to do with looks , it had nothing to do with what kind of job they had. It was the person , the personality ,  how sincere they were about the lifestyle , how sincere they felt about who they wanted to be and needed to be. With me personality plays a huge role , if we can talk to each other and not at each other then we are good. How serious they were about their training , how entering a relationship would benefit us both ?

Giving up control is something that happens over time, the more you communicate , spending a great deal of time together, taking the time to learn about each other outside of BDSM . As a submissive the closer you get the more control you are naturally going to give, and this will happen without thought..

The only factor that really comes into play is you giving up control to someone who has your best interest in mind. Someone who is going to dedicate the time to spend with you.

Submission is not a game , to some Dominants submission is a game such as the part time Dominants I spoke about on my last post, the weekend warrior, the married Dom cheating on his wife. It should not be fair when you the submissive are the only one taking part in such a journey.

The game is using you, humiliating you , hurting you physically and mentally , ignoring your needs without a care , and you sit there alone wondering what you did wrong. Your relationship is based on you sucking cock , sending videos, and pictures so the so called Dom can get their rocks off.

I was reading in a forum not long ago about Red Flags, how many red flags do you allow when you first meet a new Dominant? I was surprised at the answers , some were 2 some were3 even up to 5 flags before ending the relationship. My thinking is any type of flag , be it something not adding up or you catch someone in a lie. If someone lies to you once they will do it again.  A flag is a flag.

Another Scenario that takes place , prior to entering a relationship you think everything is flowing in the right direction.. Then you find once you have committed yourself things begin to change. Things are not what they were , now it seems you are in more of a vanilla relationship than a D’s or M’s. and when you question , you get well I am in a slump or everything will be okay.

As you read in the Part Time Dominant , being a Dominant requires a great deal of work, it requires one to be consistent , in control, insuring rules and protocols are being followed.

What do you want to do with your one and only Life ? How long do you wait for the relationship you were promised ? How long do you go along with the communication break down ? How long do you endure the abuse in a relationship? Your scared because that is how you were made to feel, your insecure because that is how you were made to feel, your not good enough for anyone else , because that is how you were made to feel.