Archive for the Ego Category

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, blow job, cock sucking, codependency, codependent, commitment, communication, consequences, Dominant and Submissive, Ego, Face Fucking, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, Kink, Low Self Esteem, masochist, Master And Slave, Online Dominants, owned property, Owned Slave, Poly Triad, Private Protocol, Punishment, self confidence, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission with tags , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sitting here listening to Bret Michael’s jamming with friends , and it fucking rocks. Music is a passion of mine , it is my release , it is my time to chill , gather my thoughts , enjoy my own little world.  Ted Nugent , KISS , Aerosmith , and some country at the top of my list Kid Rock. I love the cheesy kung fu movies that comes on Thursday nights. I am a huge news fanatic so if there is something you want to know just ask.

I am very laid back for the most , I have never raised my voice or lost my temper towards my property. This is not to say I am a push over because I am not , I speak my mind no matter where I am or who I am with.

I am a Buddhist , I have learned to channel my anger but as with any man or human there is a limit. At one time I had a very bad temper , I drank a lot , you could hand me a bunch of pills  and I would not even ask what they were I would just take them. I tried to smoke all the pot in the world but I failed. I would smoke and someone would just grow more. I was on a down hill spiral with not a care about tomorrow or the future.

A Dom who has a temper is not a Dom he is a abuser and nothing more. A man who hits a woman out of anger is a pussy because he will not hit anyone who will not fight back. A Dom who will not allow you to ask questions and want answers is not a Dom. A Dom who does not allow open communication is not a Dom…

However that road of destruction ended around November 1986. October and November I lost my first two jobs after my exit from the US Army. I went cold turkey I stopped everything at one time not looking back… I thought for sure I would of had some type of withdraws but that was not the case, however I did lose most of my friends or I assumed they were friends…

At this time I was living in a small town called canton Ga. It had changed a lot being gone for ten years. Most of the people I knew had moved or changed so much we no longer had anything in common…

My Dominance is a gift and I mean that. A gift means I am taking time out of my life and offering a gift. My gift I am setting my time and life to the side and offering you security , I am offering a sanctuary of peace no drama , no arguing . I am offering you respect , I am offering you me. I am offering you a open door 24/7 , I am offering you communication 24/7. I am offering you stability , I am offering you protection. I will allow you to grow and I will conform to your needs. I will take the time out of my life to train you to fit my needs. I will not take advantage of you , I will not mislead you , I will admit my mistakes. I will offer more than I take but most of all I will always put you first.

Wow! looking over the list and it could of continued I am sure with enough thought. I just wanted to crack the door open and let people take a peak inside.

Both dominance and submission is a gift both have much to offer and prove. I am of course speaking of the beginning steps in a new relationship.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.

I am at a later date going to speak about our triad , we now live as three and while there could be some improvement things are really going well. My time training is limited due to my work but Arianna has stepped up to the plate and is offering guidance .

The Slave has a different mindset than a submissive. A submissive can and has the right to say NO. The submissive can impose limits on the relationship. The submissive can have the choice of when and when not to submit.

The word Slave , the word ownership , the word property. We all know owning a slave is not in any way legal but it is a mindset. The slave kneels holds her hands out and says I am yours to take and use.

You have to want it , you have to need and crave, it has to be in your blood. You have to live, dream and walk with this deep need and desire.

Arianna is a very unique Slave , during her training there was no rejection , there was no resistance, I could see in her eyes she had a hunger. To this day she continues to seek ways to submit more to give more. Everyday I grow with her everyday my respect grows. As my needs change Arianna conforms , but as she changes I conform to meet her needs.

Giving yourself without a thought having that feeling of being completely owned. Willing to be trained to fit someones needs and wants. Being used as a sexual object at the drop of a hat. You can be loved but in the end you are owned property.

Now I sit looking back over the years and thinking about the transformation , thinking about the growth. Watching someones habits change, watching needs change. More than willing to follow rules , protocols and understand there are consequences for her actions. To this day Arianna continues to search and find ways to submit more , she has that need, it is something she craves.

You the Slave must be in the right frame of mind and have a understanding what is about to take place. You must be willing to have over your mind and body and be willing to hand over complete control without question.

Are you Domestic more service orientated ? Are you just going to be used sexually ? Are you a Masochist used for pain? Or are you a mixture of all rolled into one?

You also must be giving a clear understanding what is expected of you , what your training will consist of , how long your training will be. You will want to know what the final goal is.

Trust is the main factor in building a Master / Slave relationship. The slave knowing once she or he agrees to the terms negotiated during the process.

You have to know most of your rights will be stripped away from you. You must know you and your body will be used , without warning. You will be taken when and how your Master chooses.

However and there is a however , you should still be allowed to see friends and family , a slave needs what I call down time. A time to relax and breath , to be able to clear the mind. A time to reflect on past and future.

We as Masters and Dominants take and we must give back more than we take. Probably two or three times a week I tell both Arianna and L that I really appreciate everything they both do. At time I do help out as well. On my days off I cook and at times I even jump in and do a few dishes.

A Slave is not your maid although the slave will be giving chores to do , A slave is not your mom. I pickup behind myself. If I use something I put it back. I do not demand dinner be done at a certain time, both know when I take lunch , If I am going to be late they eat before me.

Many just sit back and look for reasons to punish and my question is why? We can just sit back and find something wrong and the first thing that most grab is a belt or paddle.

Although I run a strict house punishing is something I do not look forward to, just as a parent feels bad for punishing a child.

We as humans , Masters and Dominants make mistakes maybe not on a daily basis but we do. Slaves and submissive’s make mistakes as well but nothing more could be more devastating known they have failed.

As with the 7 types of Submissives there are just as many slaves , but also there are just as many Dominants or Masters..

The service slave is more geared towards service , cleaning , cooking , and keeping things in order. Although sex does play a part service is their main goal. Just knowing their Master is pleased gives them pleasure.

The sex slave can be a little service orientated but is geared more at being used as a sex object , at times no holes barred. The sex slave gets off more knowing they have pleased than them getting off. Most sex slaves will conform to what pleases the Master and urge those actions more.

The Masochist in most cases is neither just as a full blown sadist. Very little structure , very few rules, it is all about the pain and the pleasure the sadist gets out of inflicting pain.

The all around slave a mixture of all of the above , a slave that needs a little of all , being used , in service and at times stepping up to take what pain is giving..

We as Master need to step up to the plate , owning one of the above takes a great deal of time and responsibility. We must make ourselves available 24/7. Arianna knows she can wake me at any time to talk.. We must give more than we take.

Being codependent does not make you broken , being needy does not make you broken , having a low self esteem does not make you broken in fact many times it makes you special.

I have heard many times I am broken or I am not worthy of having a Dominant or Master.

I myself prefer the needy part even the codependent , it is just knowing how to handle and being able to offer the care. Short term neither play out good if both sides are not ready to commit.

I have found very few Dominants or those who call themselves Masters who are truly willing to take any type of relationship serious or willing to take the responsibility needed.  These are the guys who hide behind the computer , the trolls who really have no clue. Once they find someone who is gullible enough it is short lived . The crazy rules the unrealistic demands , the confusion of changing rules just so they can punish.

Training is very time consuming just the initial training I am going to say 90 days with hands on contact on a daily basis. In order to be in control you have to be able to reach out and touch. Online training does not work , it works as long as the computer is on and you have 24/7 contact then it is still iffy.

You have to have need , the craving to be owned , the craving to be used , the craving to be called property. The craving to be able to hand yourself over completely.

The hardest part is the first 90 days it will tell you number one if you are just going through a frenzy or the life of a slave is not you….. It is easy to throw in the towel and give up , it takes a lot to stick it out , but if things are not what they seem , the raise the white flag and say I am done… No shame your just being true. I can assure you the Dominant you leave is not the last in the world.

I believe at times humiliation is needed , it is needed to bring someone back down to reality. It is meant to give a shock , kinda like sticker shock when looking at a new car. It brings someone ego back down to earth. Even during my relationship there are times I will use some form of humiliation to keep things in check , it puts them or reminds the slave of their place..

The word USE I use my property , I use my property for my pleasure , even during fucking I use the word USE , I love using you , I love fucking my property , I love fucking your ass. I like the little reminders..

We live a micromanaged relationship as most of you know. I control everything. I control hair color , I control the length , the nail polish , her clothes . I control the way she walks , talks. I control how she acts in public. I control bathroom , food , bedtime , shower , shaving. I receive a hourly check in 90% of the time with pictures. Both girls have a mileage book although I do not check it on a regular basis it is there if I have the urge to look. I have no passwords , I see no need mainly because I am secure enough in my relationship. However I will at times pick up the phones and strum through them.  If you as a Dominant has the need to demand passwords you do not trust and you have a very low self esteem.

If you the Dominant are insecure how can you control someone and your ego not be behind the force of your relationship? A relationship based on insecurities and ego will be short lived and you brought it on yourself, but you will sit in a corner and cry like a little bitch. Even in a relationship when things don’t go your way you still act like a little bitch.

You cannot be a part time Master , you have to be a Master 24/7 365

If you noticed I did not speak to much about Kink , or Bondage. My relationship runs much deeper. While at times I enjoy getting rough , at times I enjoy bondage , at times I get off on sexual abuse , face fucking being my favorite, then anal. I am more about the control , I love being in the mind. I love the structure . I have a life with zero problems and zero drama.. I love my life

New Dominants your best source for information http://bestslavetraining.com/

Oh My Ride

 

Grow up and be a man…

 

 

BDSM And Discipline

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Abuse, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave, BDSM Structure, Building a BDSM Relationshp, communication, consequences, Consistency, controlling, Discipline, Dominant and Submissive, Dominants, Ego, fucking and sucking, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Protocols, punish, Punishment, Slave, Structure, Submission, training your slave, Training your submissive, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , , , , , , , on March 25, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Discipline is something I do not look forward to nor do I set back and hope a rule will be broken. That takes way to much time and causes one to walk on egg shells….

My observation in the lifestyle most Discipline or punishment is in a  physical form and consist of pain and leaving black and blue marks , how ever I believe something that is looked over when others speak of being punished is aftercare.

Being punished the different forms , the main of course which is most commonly used is physical, which I have used in the past , but my way of thinking if a rule or protocol is broken 99% of the time it was a mistake. So I sit down and talk so I can find out what happened. Did something come up , or was it forgotten? The next question is what can be done to prevent it from happening again , what steps are going to be taking to make sure it does not happen again?

Some different ways besides physical , would be verbal , talking and seeing what happened.  taking something away , taking a privilege away , confinement, you get the idea. Beating someone is not always the answer although if you read enough blogs or talk with others this seems to be the trend today.

If a submissive or slave is breaking rules on a daily basis there is a problem, a lack of attention or maybe the training.

I met a Baby girl at a local function I know the Dom well, and while outside I could hear the displeasure in her voice. She had just moved from Main down to Florida and the end result was not good he ended up putting her out on the street.

A friend of mine sent me a text and asked me to call him so we could figure out what happened and what we could do. We did find her a place to stay but she had already made arrangements to fly home with the help of her parents.

Why was it her fault ? Number one she did not do her homework , she did not Vet him prior to moving down meaning she did not contact anyone to see if he was who he said he was, as it turned out he was not.. She took his word on everything , only to sell everything she owned moved and found out soon afterward everything was a lie.

I tried to reach out to him after she contacted me and asked why he was kicking her out? He just stated she was not for him, and when I asked if he was just going to put her out his answer was yes.

The texting was going good until I asked him what steps he had taken in training her , and the conversation went dead. This just proved he had no clue, nor did he care about putting the work into the relationship to make it work.

I think when it comes to our lifestyle Discipline in someways are over played , many see discipline as a daily ritual , see it as needed in order to be in a relationship.

Just a few and the first and most popular is the physical part the spanking, the beating, the leaving bruises as a reminder a show of Authority showing who is in charge.

Self punishment which I always found funny, that is something I never took part in and I find it to be Ego driven and someone who is full of their own shit.

Taking a privilege away something the submissive or slave enjoys, be it TV , a girls night out, their ipad something one cherishes. Free time giving during the day , down time, I have found this to be very effective.

Then talking , communication sitting down one on one and find out what happened , why was a rule broken ? There are times when it cant be helped, and at times things need to be looked over.

As Dominants you spend so much of your time building an awesome relationship why would one take the time to beat someone so precious, someone who is suppose to mean the world to you.

Those who do not have a clue spend much of their time talking down to the sub or slave, degrading and humiliating. This is to keep someone at a very low self esteem, and unless they are able to communicate with others, they do not know any better..

BDSM And Drama

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, Adapt, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Safety, Cheaters, Cheating Dominant, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Conversation, Daddy Dom, Dominant, Dominants, Dominants Protocol, Drama, Ego, emotional, Emotions, Humiliation, slave, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used with tags , , , , , , , , on October 10, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

First before I get started I wanted to share some breaking news.

U.S. airstrikes “are not going to save” the key Syrian city of Kobani from being overtaken by ISIS, said Pentagon spokesman Rear Adm. John Kirby.

Now on the good side of things. US Airstrikes were successful yesterday hitting ISIS targets.
The US hit 4 Toyotas a Chevy and a Hurst . While this may not seem bad. ISIS did take a hit on their credit score according to credit Karma. The 4 Toyotas were leased and ISIS did not have Gap Insurance. The Chevy was stolen so it did not count.
It also turns out the Hurst was the remaining band members of the Greatful Dead on tour in the middle east.

I would like to say I believe we are moving in the right direction.

I would also Like to apologize about a post I did last week.

If The Truth Hurts Go Fuck Yourself.

That post was not in my character , and I should have never posted it. I let someone upset me, because they Blasted my name out in a public forum.
While the outcome disappointed me it also did the same to Arianna. Acting out in such a manner is just not me.

The last thing you want or need when entering a new D’s or M’s or any relationship for that matter is a boat load of Drama.

It is not fair to you if you enter a relationship and someone just dumps their fucked up world in the middle of your floor.
Here you go now your part of all of my bullshit, for anyone to do such a thing is really self centered , non caring, and very selfish on their part.

If a Dominant cannot control his own life, how can he control you ? If a Dominant cannot take care of his own problems, if you have any how can he possibly help you ?

Any Dominant is in full control of his life, be it at home , at work, or out in the public world.
A Dominant will not show any signs of anger, or aggressive behavior. The more in control the Dominant is, the more you are going to be willing to submit, once he has earned your respect.

A Dominant who is not in control and has a lot of Drama will put all the blame on you. Everything will be your fault. You will be the cause of the problem is the relationship does not work.

Ego this seems to be a problem going around our Happy Little community. If your Dominant is ego driven he will never have your best interest in heart. You will never be his number one priority.

A Dominant who wants to share you has a huge ego and probably knows nothing about the lifestyle.

Before entering the relationship you have to put ground rules in place, and you need to stick by them. If being shared is a hard limit then speak up.

I spoke with a Guy last year who said before his slave could come back she would have to agree to a bare back gang bang, by the men he would choose.

So where does the concern about her health come into play? Is or was he really looking out for her best interest ? I would say no myself.

Being forced to be shared can cause you harm if not physically it could do so mentally as well, and you could end up dying in the end.

Keep drama out of your life , no matter the connection you think you have. Because if your relationship is causing you heartache , and problems there is really no connection.

drama

Vile

Training Arianna

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Adapt, anal sex, Anger Issues, Arianna, ass fucking, bdsm, Cheating Dominant, cock sucking, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, Daddy Dom, Depressed, Depression, Discipline, Dominant, Ego, emotional, Emotions, Gorean Portocol, Jealous, Married Dominant, MAST, Master And Slave, Masters And Slaves Together, micromanage, Micromanagement, molding your slave, owning a slave, Patience, Protocol, Protocol public, Punishment, references, Rough Sex, Rules, slave, slave positions, Spanking, Speaking In Thirds, Structure, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Text, The World Of BDSM, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Power Exchange, TPE, Train your slave, Training Arianna, training your slave, Training your submissive, Training your wife, Vile Woods on FaceBook on June 6, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Training still continues today, after two years we still continue to add. What is more interesting is Arianna continues to think of ways to give up more control. Truth be known she would be happy if she could stay home 24/7 chained to the floor, or most of her day spent in a cage.

When you hear the words A no rights Slave if you want to know the definition you can look to Arianna to find out that answer. Some take the no rights thing to an extreme but we all have common sense or I would hope. You would never want to do anything that would cause your slave any harm, or push them to the point of breaking. That is why I have stated over and over it is very important to know your submissive or slave inside and out.

What do I mean when I say no rights. First Arianna has no say so at all, before you jump the gun this was something she needed and wanted. This is why at times it is hard for a submissive or slave to find the right Dominant. If he is in it just for the game he will want no responsibility , meaning he is just after the pussy. The minute you show you are the slightest bit needy you will see a fast change in the Doms attitude.

When you speak of living D’s compared to living an M;s relationship there is a huge difference. A submissive has the right to say no, a submissive submits on their terms. While it is true a slave could really do the same if it really came down to it, but for the most that is not the frame of mind a slave wants or needs.

While there are many different resources and books on the market today, if you are a new Dominant or your interested in exploring the lifestyle then I recommend, http://bestslavetraining.com/ There is just a huge amount of information that is provided, it is almost endless.

The new Dominant who is just entering the lifestyle or the young Dominant I truly recommend this site. Also to those who are submissive it is good reading and it will show and teach you about how a D’s Or M’s relationship should truly be, again a lot of good info.

So you take a Slave and you mold them into someone you need. I myself had a very clear picture of how I saw my life living as a Master , and fully owning a Slave. In reality in today’s times you cannot legally own someone, but to be able to achieve that frame of mind is truly an unreal feeling.

You take someone and mold them into someone who fits exactly what your looking for when it comes to an M’s relationship. This is why once I started my search it took well over a year, as a matter of fact I was at the point of saying fuck it I am done, because there is no one out there who truly wants to live as a Slave. I was at the point of packing everything up and I was going to move overseas, I already had a job in place, and a place to live.

Then I met Arianna , I could tell just by talking to her she was different, the way she sat, talked , the way she communicated, the way she carried herself, the way she expressed herself and explaining why she needed to be a slave. I asked several times a Slave are you sure a Slave and not a submissive.

Then as she began to go into details about how she saw herself living as a Slave, I myself began to have doubts about taking on so much responsibility. Now it was I who had to decide if I wanted to take that step. You know I never really gave it much thought until Arianna shared how she wanted and needed to be treated. Rules , Structure , the giving up total freedom.

So I had a very short time to think about if I wanted to take such a deep step, I also have a very short time to put a plan together so it was very important to spend as much time with Arianna as I could , so I could really get to know her inside and out.

Arianna had been going through some very bad times before I met her , she was like a kid turned lose in a toy store but on an adult level, and she was very close to having a break down. She had been seeing a Doctor who had been prescribing the wrong medication for years, and every time Arianna went for a visit it was always her fault. So shortly after we met Arianna did in fact have a break down. So it was I who found a Doctor, and the doctor put her back on the right track. In the meantime I had come across Journals that Arianna had written, hundreds of them, note books dating back some 15 years, full from front to back. I spent a day and three pots of coffee just reading. I could not believe how one person could possibly endure so much hurt and pain. So we talked about the journals and I explained it was a need to get rid of the past, so we sat down and went through the journals and one by one putting each one in the trash. There were a few I did allow her to keep, those with poems that she had written or ones she felt really close to. I had someones life right before my eyes. A true story of a life full of pain and confusion, and people who did not understand her.

I suppose there comes a point where people want to care about someone until you have to put a little effort back into the relationship, once it becomes a little work to make the relationship work it is no longer adventitious so you slowly begin to start being pushed out, or everything is just blamed on you.

You can do it, there is nothing wrong with you. I do not understand how or why you feel like you do, I just want you to fix it.

Now my challenge had grown ever bigger because I had to change my whole plan, I had to sit down and think and think fast. I knew she wanted to be trained but I also had to consider her health factor, on the mental side of it. Her past relationships with Dominants had been abusive, verbally and physically and neither one of them had a clue who Arianna really was. Neither one really knew Arianna as a person , neither one knew her thoughts or needs nor did they really care. At the same time I had to stand firm, I had to implement rules, put structure into place.

Shortly after her break down I was called in to meet with her doctor, and after explaining our relationship she even said Arianna was in a good place, and the structure I provided was good for her..

You can only be trained if you actually live the D’s or M’s lifestyle 24/7. If you do not live together there is noway to even implement a plan. The Dominant is not there to enforce the structure, rules or protocols. Some may disagree and if you do I would like to see your plan because I am going to lay my plan out here.

If you do not live together you really do not have any control, you as the Dominant may think you have control but you are not there. Being in control via text, chat, on the phone, Skype does not compare to being able to wrap your hands around her throat and looking straight into her eyes, and speaking, then you are and have control.

If you are only seeing your Dominant once or maybe twice a month you are not living the true D’s more so if your just meeting up in a motel room, you are only experiencing the kink side of it, your there for a couple of hours maybe the night, the Dom leaves happy and you leave full of cum until the next meeting.

Training your Slave I am going to leave the submissive out of this picture for now because the Submissive has the right to say no. The Submissive puts limits on their submission. Just as the Bottom the bottom for the most only submits during play and will tell you before hand what is going to happen.

I believe many who are new to the lifestyle and who are submissive are being told they are a slave when in fact they are only submissive. Many men who claim to be the Fifty Shades of Grey for what ever reason prefer the word slave, or they try and plant a seed in your mind to make you think. You already have a pretty clear picture of what your limits are and you should stand by them.

This is why I did not want a D’s relationship, I had tried a D’s relationship several times and it just did not pan out. Once I started my search it was well over a year before I stumbled across Arianna, and it was like she just fell from the sky right onto my Lap

When training your slave you are taking bad habits and changing them with new habits. You are implementing new habits into ones life. The thing that really got into my mind was Arianna really had no habits, there was nothing she did on a regular basis that you would actually call a habit.

The same with rules and structure you are implementing new habits. I will say this none of Arianna’s rules are sexual. Rules are meant to improve ones life, to help guide, provide structure. safety , and make one feel secure. Ive read many post and blogs where rules are posted and they are sexually based. I really find this to be really disturbing , because the Dom or Daddy is really doing nothing to improve.

If you do not get to know your Submissive or Slave inside, out and you start implementing things and you do not know them on a emotional playing field you could really fuck someone up. If you have a submissive who suffers from any type of depression and you don’t know the medications they are taking, again you can really fuck someone up. If you do not ask these questions in depth during your first meeting , then it is apparent you really do not give a fuck, your only thinking of yourself.

You take someones life and you turn it completely around, you take a human and turn them inside out, you change everything about them right down to their personality, in some cases even the way they think.

I started training Arianna the day she moved in. I did not say okay your training has started, or this is what we are going to do. The training is something that we had been talking about but I really did not go into any great details.

I have talked about this before but I did not really go into any great detail. One huge mistake that most Dominants make or Daddy’s once in a relationship they tend to isolate the submissive, they cut them off from all friends and sometimes family. My train of thought is this is a huge mistake, because you still have to allow them some freedom, because there is a breaking point. The Submissive or Slave does need a break, a day off , time to visit friends, a girls night out, a day with the family. Doms who do not allow this have a very low self esteem, they are very insecure, jealous, they have trust issues, and probably ego driving, these are the abusers be it verbal or physical. Your relationship is a power struggle between the two of you, your resisting on all levels but you do not know why you cannot fully submit.

The first week we lived together we were like your every day normal Vanilla couple, we talked laughed, joked. The 8th day I restricted certain areas of the house. I walked Arianna around the house showing her where she was allowed to sit, and the furniture was not anyplace she was allowed. This was practiced on a daily basis. She now had to have permission to enter the bed. She now had to have permission to shower, to go to the bathroom. She now had to have permission to play on her phone, watch TV . When we ate dinner she sat on the floor next to me, and at times I would feed her. While in the house there were only two places she was allowed to sit. On the floor next to the sofa, or on the floor next to me at the dinner table. In the morning time I would allow her to sit at the table while we had our morning coffee.

Over a period of ninety days I implemented 20 rues, all of which were meant for self improvement. Again none of the rules were sexual. To gain more control, I implemented the speaking in thirds, may this slave, can this slave, this slave would like. Speaking in thirds is an awesome training tool, but I use only for a short time, or at times I will use as a form of punishment

I changed Arianna demeanor meaning the way she walked, the way she spoke to people. I implemented protocols for private and public. I trained her for in house service for when company was over.

One of the first things I did when Arianna and I first met I introduced her to others who were in the lifestyle, people I had known for 20 plus years. This I believe gave me greater credibility in her eyes, because she knew then I was who I said I was. We went out to eat with other couples in the lifestyle, we were invited to friends of mine for dinner , people just had to meet Arianna, and everyone welcomed her with open arms.

The came the service test I invited a Master and Slave over. Arianna and I cooked a rockin dinner, and Arianna served, and before we ate she either stood behind me or knelt beside me while we talked. That night she was the perfect host.

During this time sex was kept minimal and only on my terms. I said spread I used her and I got off, most of the time without even speaking, until she asked permission to exit the bed.

Arianna now needed permission to shower , she now needed permission to go to the bathroom. There were no exceptions. I now controlled what Arianna ate while at work, and how much she was able to spend.

Arianna now had to keep a daily journal one in the car so she could write down the time and mileage, when she left the house to go to work, when she arrived to work, when she left from work. If she needed to stop by the store if we had not discussed prior she needed permission. Once home she had another journal. This was so she could write down the time she started task, and the finish times.

I then implemented a few of the Gorean slave positions I did not use daily but when I did they were used mainly for humiliation to sort of remind her who and what she was.

Sex I love to fuck, I cannot remember the last time I made love. I do not even think it is possible for me any more, I love to fuck. There are three holes and I use which ever I want without asking.

You know years ago I never would of thought you could actually teach someone the way you wanted your cock sucked, or the way you wanted them to spread while your fucking, or if you told someone to lube your cock and they immediately got on their hands and knees and reached around spreading their ass open with out having to tell them, or to snap your finger and that was the notification to suck your cock.  There is nothing like the feeling knowing that your Slave lives to please you.

Okay so going on a little over two years now, wow time has flown by. Arianna has been punished one time and one time only. I usually do not spank as a form of punishment but this time it was needed. It reminded her of what she did, and now she thinks before acting, because she knows in our house there are two things you take note to, Choices and consequences.

To be able to train someone or be trained if you do not live together it is almost impossible, its like putting a screen door on a submarine and not expecting water to come in.

Now before you jump the gun and say wow vile your an asshole, or your mean and cruel, I am going to say 90% of the above was Arianna’s idea this is how she saw herself living as a slave, A slave not a submissive.

We were only able to achieve such a relationship with constant communication. Communication is the magic key, and if your submissive or slave does not feel they can talk to you about anything on any level, then you will never have their total submission, and your relationship will crash and fucking burn.

If you are seeing a married Dominant who is cheating on his wife, you will never be able to explore your submission to the depths you need, you will never be allowed to be who you are, most of all you will never be fully free.

One thing that just blows my mind and maybe someone can answer this question. If your seeing a Married so called Dom or Daddy, what do you think about while your sucking his cock? Do you think about how his wife sucks his cock? Maybe you think about him fucking his wife? Maybe he fucked her in the ass and did not shower before coming to see you? Do any of these things go through your mind? Do you ever think he just fucked his wife and your cleaning his cock off? Worst if you think your the only one he’s banging if hes married, WOW . Just keep texting or trying to call see how long you have to wait, go on be miserable. Or if your texting stops abruptly for no reason. You know what the deal is, you really know but you ignore it. You will sit there and wait and wait and wait, now that is really pathetic no matter what page your on, that is truly pathetic, and you deserve everything you wish for. If you were willing to enter such a relationship, LISTEN TO ME, you get what you deserve.. Get upset with me I did not do anything I am just speaking the truth.

More to come here shortly.

Guys you can have the world, you can have the perfect relationship, you can have anything you want or need, it is at your finger tips. All you have to do is be real and stop playing games. If your married and your not happy this is for male and female get the fuck out, just fucking tell who ever your living with, Hey I am done, I am outta of here. Don’t bring your drama into their life fucking leave.

As I am nearing 250.000 visitors Sometime next week I want to share the different country’s that have visited. This is really awesome to know that people from all over the world are reading my blog….

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Vile

Living The Threesome

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, anal sex, Arianna, ass fucking, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, Collar, Collared Slave, communication, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, control, Dominance, Dominants, Ego, kinky, poly, Polyamory, Protocol, rimming, Rules, self centered, sharing, slave, submissive, sucking cock, Threesome on December 21, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

What better way than to wake up with a Bitch on both sides of you. Walking into BDSM events with a woman on either side. Being able to bring another home so you and your slave can enjoy her. Even letting your Master go out with other slaves and fucking them but he always comes home to you.

I have talked about poly several times, but then I read other blogs and they bring up new points that I did not cover. Every mans dream why stop at two, why not three, or four?

Poly can be good more so in today’s times so now you have three putting into the pot, and it does make things easier on the Alpha female, or so it would seem.

Poly is not a good thing when your relationship is fresh, poly is something that you should take your time when seeking another. I am thinking six months maybe a year. The two really need time to get to know each other

It is my opinion having a new slave for a month or two, is not a time to be bringing another into your home. Number one you do not even really know your slave, her emotions, what she can take or not take, her feelings. Surely after knowing someone just over a month you would not already have her collared. How could that possibly happen.

If your collar is just giving to you because your new Master wants to own you, how can you as the slave respect wearing a collar you did not even earn. Or you except it because you want to be owned. Again would you marry someone only knowing them for a month?

A collar is earned , Earned being the key word. I know for myself even implementing rules takes a good thirty days, I believe with Arianna is was roughly 2 months before I had my rules in place. In order to put any rules into place you have to know your slave inside and out. The rules we give are rules to improve, to make better, to insure they are using their time wisely, for the betterment.

So the rules are in place, your own protocols are in place, then the collaring begins. I myself just sit back and observe I watch I take mental notes. I look for consistency, but most of all I look for the need, the need to be owned, the need to be collared.

I do not have a desire to bring another into our home, my house. Its just not the sex I get, but it is everything that encircles our relationship. One piece of a pie does not make a whole. You have to start from scratch. You have to add all the ingredients, then you have to mix everything together, pour into your pie pan, add the crust, then you bake until done.

That is the same way when it comes to building a relationship, you are baking a pie, and you have to keep a close eye on it to insure it does not burn.

So if Arianna came to me and said Master I think we should bring another Slave into our home, your house. My first question would be why. Why do you feel we need another? Her reason would have to be a valid one, and I can tell you it would not just be about sex. It would be about helping with the daily chores, the daily task, such as cooking, or shopping, taking care of bills.

The poly relationship should never be based just on sex. The foundation should be built, the need has to be brought out, what you expect out of the relationship. More important how is a third going to benefit your home. How is the third going to make things better. What are the good point and what are the bad points?

I have someone who is somewhat of a friend who moved in with a slave, and from day one it was a total fuck up. He could not control what he had or the house, but once home from work, he spent hours on his computer trying to find another to add.

Is this fair to the slave you are bringing in? Not at all your going to bring someone into all your problems, your drama, your arguing, and say welcome to our happy home.

A good portion of slaves or those who are submissive do not even want anything to do with poly, but they will agree just to please. Because they have this acceptance thing going on, maybe a low self esteem. The need to please.

Again poly can work and it can be good for some, but it takes time , not thirty days after you have met your slave.

Okay lets say I wanted to bring in another lets say I needed more than one. I would leave that up to Arianna because she is the one who is going to have to get along with her, she is the one who is going to be going shopping with, standing side by side cooking, cleaning, laundry. The slave has to get along with your slave, they have to become best friends.

If I brought another slave into my house it would make Arianna feel inadequate, she would feel as though she was not enough, or she was not able to please me.

Okay my check list here, maybe I do need a third.

I have awesome communication , check , I have the best friend I have been looking for all my life , check, We enjoy our time together, check. We enjoy doing the same things, check. We enjoy the same foods, check. Okay now the kinky stuff. We both enjoy bondage, check. I get my cock sucked anytime I have the want, check. I get pussy anytime I want, check, I fuck her ass anytime I want, check. I can just play with her, probing both holes, really anything I want to do, check. I love being rimmed, I get that anytime I want, check, I love foot worship all I have to do is point , check. I even have my own Titty Bar, when I want her to dance for me, check.

You know I have got it made. I cannot think of a different flavor I would need. So to bring in a third there has to be a valid reason, there has to be a need that would benefit the both not just one.

I know that Arianna is against the poly thing, I know bringing in a third would do more harm than good, but if I really wanted to and I insisted on it, she would keep her mouth shut and do it. That still does not make it right. We talked about this before, she was against it and I agreed the case was closed.

Before bringing in a third sit down and talk. There has to be a reason and having a different flavor is just not a valid reason. More so in today’s times when there is some bad shit going around. Back in the day you could go down and get a shot to get the drip to stop. Today it is tons of medication just to keep you alive. Is the different flavor really worth ones life. Unless you really know someone, I still do not know.

The reason has to benefit your slave in some way. I would think there would have to be a good reason, not just so the Dom can get off. The power trip, the ego booster. Watch me while I fuck her.

Just my opinion you can agree or disagree , but do not just let someone walk all over you. You should both agree on what is good for your relationship and what is not, what is healthy and what is not.

Here is a question you can ask your Dom. Can we bring in another Male Dominant. See how far that gets you. Instead of you eating pussy in front of him, see how he feels about you sucking another cock in front of him, or how much your enjoying getting banged by another dude. See how far that conversation goes.

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Vile

Being Owned , Before You Sign A Contract

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, bdsm, Consensual, control, Discipline, Dominants, Ego, Fake Dominants, Humiliation, Master, My Bitch, Owned Slave, owning a slave, Patience, Protocol, punish, Punishment, Rules, Security, serve, slave, Slave Contract, submissive on October 11, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Some do take the lifestyle to the extreme, and not just the male at times it is the female who takes the lifestyle very serious. Nothing bothers me more than when I hear a Dominant complain about how a submissive or Slave is being treated. Maybe just maybe it could be at the sub’s request. It is fairly simple to see if someone is not happy, more so if you know them.

I have known Slaves who requested a contract, I have known Slaves who needed a contract. I am guessing this gives them a sense of security. Things are a lot different when it comes to needs , than wants.  As Dominants we are to insure all needs are met regardless of how non-important the needs may seem to us.

How could having a daily list possibly be a need for someone ? How could having a daily spanking be a need  ? How could being humiliated at times be a need ? When entering a relationship we need to go in it with both eyes and ears open.  What is not a need to one Slave may be a dire need to another.

Something else you may run into is what is called the EGO driven Dom, the chest puffed out master. Sign here Bitch or I am gone. You are my Bitch now on your knees, yea it happens.

We as Dominants are suppose to be the Elite, we are like the Special Forces of men. Not that we are really different but we have to handle things much different than say a vanilla male, mainly because of the lifestyle. We are suppose to have much more patience , we are suppose to listen, we are suppose to to structure in place, we are suppose to enforce rules, enforce daily task, we are suppose to have an open line of communication. We are suppose to be more understanding, The list just goes on and on. We are the Elite.

Just as we set boundaries , when entering a new relationship, the same should go when you are about to sign a contract. Just as you are suppose to put limits in place and you expect those limits to be respected. Once that line is crossed you begin to lose the trust you have worked so hard to build.

The same goes when you are about to sign a contract. A great deal of thought should be giving, at that point and time in your life signing a contract may be needed. The feeling of being owned, the feeling of being wanted, the feeling of security.

Arianna and I never spoke of a contract, I for one never thought such was needed. Most of the time a verbal understanding is all you really need, on the other hand some may have the need to see something in place, after all we are visual. Just as Arianna’s Slave number is framed and hanging on the bedroom wall, it is a reminder.

A contract outlines what your relationship is going to be about, it lays out the expectations of both. It also tells you the Slave how you will live your life. Your life on a day to day basis, and if not followed to a T, you then have consequences.

Take a close look before Signing , although is most states it is not recognized, it could surely cause some complications if you were to have a bad breakup. The last thing you want is something being mailed to your friends or family, much worse your work. So a lot of thought has to go into something so serious.

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Vile

Sub space Does Not Have To Equal Pain

Posted in abuse, Adrenaline, anticipation, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Session, blindfold, Bound, Consensual, control, Dominants, Ego, emotional, Emotions, endorphin's, erotic, Fear, Hot Wax, Ice, inhibitions, masochist, Master, music, Pain, sadist, Safe, Sensory Deprivation, session, slave, sub-space, Submission, submissive on October 2, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sherri was a true Masochist in almost seven year that bitch did not cry one time, with the exception of us parting. I had never seen anything like it. A belt, a single tail whip, or with a flogger with each strike her eyes would just glaze over. I remember our first session, I did not have a clue to what was going to happen or what I was going to do. She knew I was fairly new to the lifestyle so I let her instruct me. When I left her house some five hours later, I was scared to death, that bitch was black and blue from the neck down. I had even broken skin open in some places and she would just run her fingers across the cuts, and just moan. At times she could not even speak, her eyes just staring off into space with each contact the whip would make.

In the beginning it was fun well with the exception of the first session. I would have a bad week and I could take all of my frustration out on her, and she enjoyed it. A couple of years passed and my side of the enjoyment was coming to an end, along with the pain and the much needed humiliation it was now a task, a task that had to be out done from the last. It was taking it’s toll on me.

I was not in love I had not been nor would I of ever been, in the seven years being together I never fucked her one time, she sucked a lot of dick, but I never banged her. To this day I am not sure why, I just did not have that connection or the want. Maybe I did not want to develop any feelings. The only thing I truly liked and enjoyed the word NO never came out of her mouth. The words I can’t never came out of her mouth. Today that is not so important to me, I suppose back then I had somewhat of an ego.

Subspace you must be able to get into the mind of the submissive, the same if you want a relationship with a submissive or slave the Dominant must be able to get into their mind. To be able to figure them out, know what they are thinking, you must know your partner inside out.

Subspace is not obtainable every time you play it may not happen every twenty times you play. Some say they are able to achieve subspace every session but I find that hard to believe, I am not saying it is not possible, I would think it would be hard. Subspace also depends on the submission you are playing with, if you fully have control, if the submissive has giving herself to you mind and body.

You can actually achieve subspace without even touching the submissive, the idea is during play to confuse the mind, a type of sensory deprivation , I have blogged about this before with just blindfolding, music ,incense and being bound.  I have been wanting to try this on Arianna but our work schedules are pretty full. As a matter of fact although we do play it is not near as often as I would like.

You tie your submissive up, blindfold her, you have two or three CD player , playing different music at a low volume, you lite two or three different incense, then comes the hot wax, and the ice cubes. The mind cannot possibly process everything that is going on. You have the submission, she is tied spread. She is blindfolded. At this point the submissive feels vulnerable, now adding everything else, not speaking just mostly watching, this is where it all begins.

It may not work the first session but it will. I am also not sure how it would work in a vanilla relationship I have never tried it. When one hits subspace you are confusing the mind, most of the time with pain, but pain does not have to play a part in order for them to hit subspace.  Some enjoy pain some get off on pain even the thought of it, then some do not. If they are not into pain or they cannot take it, you will do more damage than good. I have heard Doms say I can train you to take pain, that is a load of crap.

I have a huge surprise for Arianna this weekend.

Try it you might like it.

 

Vile