Archive for the events Category

Leash Training

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, Behavior Modification, Collar, collar and leash, Collars, communication, Consensual, control, Discipline, Dominants, events, FaceBook, https://www.facebook.com/groups/230204630487640/244088752432561/?notif_t=like, Married Dominant, Master & Slave, Master And Slave, Masters, poly slaves, Protocol, Protocol public, Rules, Safe, slave, Slave Leash Training, Submission, submissive on February 2, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Many laugh at the idea when someone says I am going to Leash train my Slave or Submissive. The fact is, if the two are very serious about the lifestyle. The leash can have a great impact on the Slave/ Submissive.

Just as the Collar has a great emotional impact, once it is placed around the neck. The same goes when the leash is added. Now there is someone to guide you. Someone is not in full control of your movements.

The Master would teach commands not with words but with movements of the leash. Up and down are the two basic. Pulling down on the leash indicates you wish for yours to kneel, pulling up indicates you wish for them to stand. .

The Master should always hold the leash with the dominant hand. This is to insure he has full control. Teaching the slave the different movements without speaking is not as easy as it sounds. You are teaching the Slave/Submissive to follow on your commands without speaking. It would be almost the same as Pony training.

Any training for that matter you as the Dominant has to stay consistent in your training. Once you implement a rule or protocol , then you stay on that path. Staying on a path you set helps set standards. More so the Submissive/Slave knows what is expected.

To take it one step farther You can use cuffs, behind their back. This give the Master total control, and the Slave/Submissive will have to pay attention to your commands. The commands are much like the commands you would give if you use slave positions in your relationship. I do not recommend most of the positions on a daily basis, but the Slave/ Submissive will pick up on one or two the Master likes and will use without being told.

The other day Arianna and I was talking and I was going to change the way she greeted me. She did greet me on knees bent forward with arms stretched out face down. I instructed her I now wanted slave position # 2 The same but facing away from me hands on ass spreading apart. She did as instructed but later explained she did not get the same feeling. In the first position she felt more like a slave and explained while in that position she had a big grin on her face because I was home, and she could not wait to see me.  So after we talked I made that change. It truly makes Arianna proud to kneel and wait for me to walk through the door. That my friend is devotion. This is not when she feels like it, the greeting is everyday. I expect no less from my Slave.

While leash training when you are speaking all eyes should be on you. You can tell when someone is listening and when they are not and you make the corrections with a slight pull on the Leash.

Now depending on who you are and how open you are about your lifestyle. You may want to keep the Leash play just at home. You may want to wear the Leash at local BDSM events such as munchs. Or where someone is giving a Demo, on rope or maybe spanking.

You may feel comfortable wearing your leash in public. Many years ago during a bile week event here in Daytona Beach I walked Chong down Main Street with a collar and Leash on. Up one side and down the other, and not one person made a comment. People took pictures but no one said anything. I did not really expect any comments, but during bike week I have seen way crazier shit than some bitch wearing a collar and leash. You may not want to be seen in public, and that is fine.

I have not giving much thought to training Arianna with a Leash. She has enough on her plate, and to add anymore at this time would not be fair to her. I have giving it some thought in the past, and I may very well here in the future.

The Collar once put around their neck gives them a feeling of being complete. They have worked so hard to earn. They have giving more in six months to a year than they have ever giving. I cannot even imagine the rush that goes through ones mind once the collar is put on. There is way more than just the feeling of being owned.

Then you add the Leash. You the Dominant are now in full control. If the Slave or Submissive is in the right mindset it will take them places they have never been before. Total power exchange. They now know they must follow without question.

This is also a type of Behavior Modification, you are giving a different mindset. Used on a daily basis they will soon adapt, and will most likely welcome the Leash when you bring it out.

One thing you never use is a choker collar, never, never , never.

Trust me it puts them in a different place.

Hey check out my friend on facebook she has an awesome group. Hers is more active than my group is you will have a lot of fun.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/230204630487640/244088752432561/?notif_t=like

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Vile

I Am Me

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Acceptance, Advice, Argue, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Safety, blog, Bondage, Collar, communication, Consensual, control, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, events, Giving Head, Humiliation, Impact play, Kink, kinky, Lie, Lies, Love, Loyal, Master, Masters, munchs, needy, oral sex, sadist, Safe, Safe and Sane, sex, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock on December 6, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

In he past I have posted a little about who I am but I never have gone into any great detail. I have been into the lifestyle for longer than I can remember this dates back into my teens, before I even knew what BDSM was all about. Even in my teens I had the need to be in control.

I grew up in a very small town in Northern Georgia my 8th grade class had 23 people in our graduation. Going into high school it was somewhat bigger but total 9th 10th 11th and 12th only had about a thousand kids so compared to today’s school it was small. I played baseball in elementary and high school. I was a relief pitcher. I was only good for 2 or 3 innings though due to my side arm throw. At the age of 16 I was throwing 86 MPH so after a few innings my elbow would swell.

I was popular with most of the guys, but I cannot say the same about the girls , due to my sexual behavior. At that age I enjoyed bondage, face fucking, anal I was game for pretty much anything. It was a control things.

I caught onto life pretty fast I grew up in an abusive home, and both parents were addicted to pain medications, and of course alcohol. The one thing I learned on a daily basis is I was not going to be like them. To this day I could never figure out why they argued. My real mother has since past but my father is still living and we have somewhat of a good relationship. I have one brother who just turned 46 I am 51 by the way. Him and I talk often but have only seen each other maybe 3 or 4 times in the past 15 years.

I have never really been into drugs although as a teen I tried to smoke all the pot in the world but they just grew more so I lost that battle, I have never done any hard drugs such as cocaine , I am not big on pills , but I do have a drink from time to time. Every now and then I will get sideways but that is far and few.

I learned about the lifestyle shortly after I joined the Army and was stationed in Korea, and even then I just happen to stumble into it. I was introduced to an old man named Kim who lived with 5 slaves.

There is a huge difference in the lifestyle than in the US. In Korea a Slave would have nothing to do with a Dominant or Master unless she knew who trained you. Since the lifestyle in Asia is so underground it is probably still the same.

Once back in the states I was still young and dumb, but I had a couple of things on my side. I no longer had a temper, I was very calm, and I knew how to get into someones head. All of the sex, face fucking, ass fucking meant nothing but now I had a weapon that was very effective.

So for many years I spent most of my time just using, I would get what I wanted and just toss to the side and look for the next. This went on for a number of years. To me a long term relationship was a three day weekend, much more past that I was just bored.

One thing I did learn and it can be good and bad, I learned from an early age to speak my mind, If I thought it I said it. Another thing I learned was to observe people, I am a people watcher. What I learned from watching people is how I did not want to live.

So I have had several long term relationships, but have only been in what I would call love maybe 3 times in my 51 years. That is not a very good track record. In between up until a couple of years ago there were a couple of times I settled for less that what I needed and wanted, knowing it was not going to work, but I am human.

How you see me on here is me, once I log on and I start a new post I do not change. I am the same at home, in public, at work or at a local munch, I am me. I never try to be someone I am not.

I remember several years ago and this is what hit me, I was at a Chinese buffet with a friend and another friend showed up with a date, and when he said hey Vile whats up I asked them to sit down and join us and his date was just starring at me, and finely asked if I use to live in these apartments and I said yes. She actually started trembling and told her date she wanted to leave. She was truly scared of me. On my way home Animel and I were laughing at her, but once home I mixed a jack and coke and I was standing outside on the river bank and I started thinking. Wow if she was scared of me just how many more feel the same way. Then it hit me being feared is nothing to be proud of, that is not how I wanted to be known as.

So I put a plan together, I was going on a Vile clean up campaign. I was going to be my own public relations manger. I was going to clean the story of Vile up.

I became more active in the community. I started doing a lot of speaking, dating more, changing up my way of playing, putting my sadistic nature to the side, and before I knew it I was back in the game, I was back in the hunt. I was no longer feared I was very respected in the community, today even more so.  So a year later standing outside looking over the river drinking a jack and coke, I thought to myself well done Vile you did the impossible.

I was still missing something though and I could not put my finger on it, then I was at Bush Gardens one day and I saw all of these family’s walking by with kids and I said that is it man you need a wife and a kid. So off I went 3 months later I was married and a short time after she was pregnant. We lost our first son to a heart transplant he was 18 days old. By this time I had enough of the vanilla life and I had to get back to being me, and wow she was pregnant again. So I stuck it out for another 3.5 years then I had to come clean about who and what I was.

Now I was married for nine years to the most vanilla woman in the world, the sex was horrible, she could not suck a dick to save her life, and no ass fucking. I said you are killing me here. So after I came clean she agreed to let me move a Slave in, yea baby , but she was only an in service slave, NO SEX. My ex-wife was a horrible house keeper, she could not cook, and clutter everywhere. So I moved this bitch in and she went to work. A week later spotless house, meals cooked every night, my lunch packed kids off to school, picked up this was the life. So my ex gets jealous and says you both have to go. Let me think okay I am out of here. I told the salve hey its been nice love ya go back home.

I have a very good relationship with my Ex wife, there is no drama, Arianna and her get along good, my son likes Arianna. So now life is good.

So when I log onto wordpress I am me, this is who I am. If I were to try and be something different what would people who read here think of me. I tell the truth , I live by the truth.

Many have asked for advice and when I tell them what they do not want to hear, most get mad. If I told everyone what they wanted to hear where would that get you ?

I do not want you to agree with everything I post, or the way I believe, the way I think. My post are to make you think, my post are meant to be objective.

Much of my blog is about safety okay so Ive had a change of heart over the past several years. I speak on safety because you as a submissive or slave can get fucked up, you can get hurt and hurt bad. Most do not think before entering a relationship. More so the new who are entering the lifestyle. You do not listen until it is to late. You want what you want and you want it now. It does not work that way

So the next morning when you wake up and your bruised from head to toe, or something is broken, you can think back, yea Vile told me, and I did not listen. Bondage is no game and if you get some dude that does not have a clue to what he is doing, you just may not wake up the next morning.

Most new Doms are into hard impact play, again if he does not know what he is doing he could break sometime, or even worse while spanking and he hits to high and to hard, you could lose a kidney. BDSM is not a game you can get fucked up. Bondage there are many no’s. You can damage tendons if tied to tight. Remember that when you meet a Dom for the first time and he brings his little travel bag and he is totally clueless about what he is going to do. Yea take his word when he says oh I have been in the lifestyle for 20 years. Are you really going to take his word ?

The first thing I did when Arianna and I agreed to enter a relationship was to introduce her to people I knew in the lifestyle people I had known for years. There is nothing like the feeling of being safe.

Keeping your girls safe is what the majority of my blog is about, it is up to you if you listen or not. Again why do you think that over 95% of the 236 followers are women and there are so few men ?

I am not here to put other Doms or Masters down. I am not here to say I am better than your Master, because I am not we all have our own way of living.

Being a Submissive or Slave is not about being on your hands and knees scrubbing the floor, doing laundry , cooking or cleaning house. Being a Slave is not about being passed around like a dog, unless that is your kink, if so then go with the flow. Being a Slave does not mean your stupid, or you cannot think on your own. You are human, but a Human with different needs.

Slaves are needy for the most as with those who are submissive. You should not have to change who you are. I like needy myself, I like my Bitch to hang all over me. If your Master excepted you the way you were then he should not try and change you.

I share things because I want you to see what kind of relationship you can have, a relationship filled with love and respect. A relationship where you are cared for. A relationship filled with communication, then you add all of the kink.

You do not have to put up with drama, you do not have to put up with lies , you do not have to put up with abuse, arguing the list goes on and on. Before a Slave or Submissive you are human, you have feelings, you have needs and they should be met. If they are not speak your mind and if things do not change, fucking leave.

Why would a Master argue with his Slave ? Who is in charge at this point ? Why would you allow a Master to Slap you around ? degrade you, humiliate you in anger, call you names out of anger. Why would you allow such things ?

You as a slave or submissive has the right to be happy treated with respect, you do not needs someones drama brought into your life nor should you bring your drama with you.

I put a lot of work into my relationship 25 hours a day 8 days a week 366 days a year. I take care of mine and only mine. I am there through good and bad. I am there when Arianna gets emotional . My time is dedicated to her and only her. I am not looking to add to my house. Because I get anything I want when I want.  She would never think of saying NO. Be it sucking my cock, fucking , anal anything. Why ? Because I go above and beyond to insure she is taking care of. She knows that not matter what she comes first. That is the way it should be.

Be who and what you are, and make sure your Master does the same.

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Vile

An Email From A Slave

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Acceptance, Advice, anal sex, Argue, Arianna, Ass, ass fucking, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Safety, blow job, Cherish, codependent, Collar, collaring ceremony, communication, Consensual, Consistency, control, Discipline, events, Friends, Friendship, Giving Head, Indebted, Manipulation, Marriage ceremony, MAST, Master, munchs, No Rights, oral, oral sex, owning a slave, Patience, Rules, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, sucking dick, Total Power Exchange, Total Slavery, TPE, training your slave on November 17, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

At our last Munch Arianna met a new Slave, new to the lifestyle. She was there to meet Sir E who I have very much respect for.  Although I may not agree with everything he believes in, we are all different so I do try to keep an open mind.

As Dominants we all train different, we all want different things from out Slaves, different goals. How one Dominant trains his Slave is really none of my business, her rules, her task, what ever it is really nothing to me. If I see some type of abuse I may say something but other than that to each their own.

Sir E instructed his new Slave to contact Arianna , I suppose for advice, tips and friendship. She started sending Arianna emails asking questions since she is new to the lifestyle. This is her first Master and Slave relationship, this is also her first poly relationship, so yes there are a ton of questions.

I myself lived in a poly relationship , the second female was mainly my slaves pet we never had sex nor did I want to. If it had been the other way around and all three of us were really close I do not know if I could of giving both the attention that was needed. I think Sir E has 4 or 5 Slaves, but as far as I know only one lives with him.

In my world and my views Slaves are very needy, this is not true will all Slaves but I believe for the most they are. Some slaves can be independent when needed, while some do not want that independence. I prefer the later.

Being a Slave does not make one a Doormat either, being a Slave does not make one weak, being a Slave does not make one Dumb. Slaves are very strong willed.

So Arianna forwarded and email response and was seeking my approval before she sent it. As I was reading the email it really got me to thinking because I had heard all of this before, but maybe I did not listen as well as I should have. Some of it caught me off guard, but the entire email really impressed me.

Many of the people we meet in the lifestyle do not really understand how our relationship works. This sounds funny coming from Master’s and Slave’s

Just like at the Last MAST the first question I was asked is how do we argue? My answer was we do not argue we never have. When I make this statement and I have several times in a group. THERE HAS TO BE A BITCH IN THE HOUSE. As I am looking around I see the Jaws drop, mostly from Slaves and Submissive’s I live by those words, and I stick to them on a daily basis. Why would a Slave argue with their Master, more so why would a Master stand for it. If the two argue is it truly a M’s relationship?

I treat Arianna very well, as you will read from her email. I have the up most respect for Arianna as you will read. There is no abuse in our relationship as you will read. One thing I want to point out is you will see that we are a true Master and Slave, we live in a TPE Total Power Exchange relationship.

There has been a few emails from this other Slave but I am going to share one, and then Arianna’s response.

On Nov 16, 2013, at 10:48 AM, @aol.com> wrote:

OKAY!!!! you win. Just thought i got lost in that social calendar of yours……lol

my real name just for “us” not munchers ……:-0

 

is E some people call me LAINEY…….nowadays i seem to answer to alot of things……..lol

 

 

MASTER did not approve of slave name list so i am back to ground zero

 

i won’t be seeing him this week either    bummer all the way around.

 

 

So, what’s on your agenda for Thanksgiving i forgot  if you told me. do you cook? bake? Do you spoil your Sir? Does he spoil you?

 

Do you have vaniila family? DO they know? approve? Is it separate? mine would commit me…i couldn’t even explain.

 

 

i am a fabulous cook and baker . BUT since losing weight i don’t No temptation  for me. I seem to be a two note prson i want something in my mouth either or seems to do the trick.  so i’m not doing food anymore…….haha

 

 

No more discussion about the positions “Just keep practicing” i’m told. This is like the CIA need to know basis .

 

 

it’s the POLY part i guess cause you know how we women are …has to be difficult to keep evryone happy im sure its easy to keep everyone in line  but Happy ? that’s probably different. ???????? very  different. i like different  so this is all about trying new and living  for now and seeing everything i missed being a good little wifey……….

 

 

What does your day include ? Does your Master give you assignments? Do you ever meet him for sexy lunches?

 

Do you ever start things to surprise him? Does he have total power over that? What if you wanted to,  but he hadn’t initiated it?

 

What if he said  NO?  Would he make you beg? Could you seduce him into changing his mind?  Yes, i have been reading again? just curious……if too personal don’t answer. I am curious about some things that are involving slave Master things if i ask and you dont want to reply just say no comment E  go read. i won’t be offended i’m just trying to see if this is normal or weird? of course who can really judge what’s normal for one is weird for another but i guess i mean is it usual in the “life”.

 

but for the record i have no say in anything so far i just show up when told it’s 100% surrender of power. at this point i can have some passes on some things i’m scared of “still never done yet”-we discussed but once collared that goes away.

 

is that normal? slave/ MASTER stuff?

 

 

It looks like a day to be outside so i’m leaving now…..have a good one  take care beauty! from J, E, Rebekah,Jamsine,

 

Cassandra, ect ect ect……..OH the KING and i……….

 

 

As you can see there are a ton of questions. I suppose Master E instructed the Slave to write Arianna, because for one she is experienced , two Master E knows we are a true Master and Slave, three he knows Arianna will not cross any boundary’s. four Master E knows Arianna will be truthful.

 

Here is Arianna’s response.

 

 

My response is first. Her email is second.
This is unsent. Waiting for your approval. Master
Dear E,
Well E was one of my guesses so you have to give me credit there.
I’ll try and answer most of your questions. Forgive me if I miss a couple.
Thanksgiving- my mom, stepdad, adopted baby brother (he’s 11) and his friend are coming over to our house for dinner. My mom and stepdad know about my lifestyle although my mom doesn’t like hearing about it. She knows that our wedding and collaring ceremony was rolled into one and did not want to attend. That was fine because it would have made it awkward. Lol
Other than my parents, no one else in my family is aware although I wear my collar 24/7.
I do most of the cooking lately. Mainly because Master works more than me. He does spoil me though with surf and turf dinners and all the fixings sometimes. He enjoys cooking but just doesn’t have the time. Although he is the grill god. We grill at least once a week. My baking consists of boxed cakes and brownies. Hehe
My day…  Well when I get home from work, I must shower before Master gets home so I am all clean and ready for use if he so chooses. I have responsibilities of keeping the house, I do 95% of the shopping and cleaning and laundry. It’s not a big deal though. I think woman in general like to keep a clean house.
Each morning when Master and I have our coffee together I write a to do list which either gets approved, added to, or items vetoed. Master does not like me to get too tired and realizes that with me working full time that some things on the list may not get done. He will asterisk the important things.
Master wakes up with me at 3:40am on my work days. Everyday without fail. He will also talk to me in the phone during my hour commute. This is before he himself works a 9-11 hour day.
I am open to initiate serving him sexually. He likes when I ask to service him but sometimes the answer is no. He has total control over that. Most of the time it’s about him but if I ask I sometimes can play too.  I do not, seduce him. It’s really not an option because he is in control at all times. So if it happens then he so chooses whether I am putting on a show or not. He is the first man I met that doesnt think with his dick.  His no means no.
I also would be hard pressed to define what is “normal” in the lifestyle because there are so many variations.
I know that, for my Master and I, the collar means a commitment similar to a marriage. It a consensual agreement for me to be a servant to his wants and needs. I gave myself to him and trust that he will not push hard enough to break me. He does not want to harm his property but takes great care to make sure that I have my needs met. The wants, maybe. But my needs definitely are met.
That is the basis of our commitment to each other. I take care of his wants and needs and he gives me what he decides I need for ultimately he knows me best. He gives me structure and purpose. A guided hand to lead the way. Most of the information about our issues are on a need to know basis. He does not involve me in some things because he handles everything. I gave all my rights to him and I only have the rights that he allows me to have.
I ask for permission to use the restroom, and sit on furniture when we are together. When we are apart I can use the restroom at will but still not allowed on our furniture at the house except for the dining room table. Permission is needed to sit on soft things.  Lol
Permission is needed to enter and exit the bed. My Master controls my sleep, when I go to bed and if I get a nap. And When I shower.
Some of our rituals include me keeping journals of my activities. For example. When I leave the house I write down time and mileage in a book. He wants to know when I arrive some place and when I’m leaving. Permission is needed for any stop that I make if it’s not planned ahead of time.
I also keep a log of my activities when I am home alone. This includes times of things I do. For example, log how long it took to wash dishes, take a shower, when I put laundry in, clean the bird cage, vacuum, make the bed, etc.
I am considered micromanaged which isn’t for everyone. Most masters don’t want to be bothered with the details like that but it works for us.
There are things that I do without being asked. I greet Master at the door usually naked and in a kneeling/head to the floor. Arms stretched out position.
Sometimes when he leaves the room, I wait in a kneeling position for his return. I dry him off once he is out of the shower and kneel next to the tub when he’s in the shower. I help undress him after he gets home from work and lay out his clothes. I normally will pick his clothes out for him to wear out. He has full say over what I wear out although I get to give him options which he can overrule at any time.
He has say over the color of my nails and hair.
I wear a bracelet engraved WWVD- what would Vile do
This reminds me that my actions both public and private reflect my submission.
He has access to my phone which includes all texts, contacts, and emails. Basically he has full control.
Our communication though is like no other. He listens. Really listens and remembers every thought. He is inquisitive about how I’m feeling and what’s going on in my mind. I feel totally indebted to him and respect him galore.
Anyways…. I was kind of all over the place but hope that gave you an insight Into my slavehood. But this is only my own experience. Yours could be totally different.
Sincerely
Arianna.
When I read this I was just blown away. I am going to print it and save it, so when we are out at other functions and people ask, I will just say here read.
I do not think with my cock. I did that when I was a teen in my early 20’s maybe even very early 30’s ….. I run my house, I have the final say. This does not mean I never ask for advice or Arianna’s opinion because I do. Just like she stated most everything is on a need to know basis.
Arianna spoke the truth. I do get serviced anytime I wish but she does ask several times a day if she can service me. That is how you can tell if someone truly cares. Yes most of the time it is about me. I want to fuck bust a nut and go about what I was doing.  Her Body and mind belong to me. The same with her mouth pussy and ass, which I use when I wish, and I use how I want to. As you read I give a lot back, I just do not take. Arianna gives 150% while I give 200% that is on a daily basis.
Much Love to everyone who has stopped by. It is you the readers that keeps me going. I will have a website up pretty soon, so I can be more open, more so with the picture thing, but everything will be from my WordPress.
Image Our Slave does look up to us.
Vile

 

Total Slavery 101

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Acceptance, anger, Argue, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Session, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, blow job, Bondage, communication, Consensual, control, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Discipline, Dominants, events, Ex wife, Fetish, Floggers, Giving Head, Humiliation, Kink, kinky, masochist, Master, Masters, Mentor, Micromanagement, molding your slave, No Inhibitions, No Rights, oral, owning a slave, Pain, Pony Girl, pony play, problems, punish, Punishment, Rules, sadist, Safe, Safe and Sane, Self-Discipline, session, sex, slave, Spanking, stupid, submissive, sucking cock, sucking dick, Total Slavery, TPE, training your slave, Verbal abuse, Viles House on August 14, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

A Slave is not dumb, a Slave is not weak, a Slave is just like any other with different needs and desires.

Looking back I am not as strict as I once was. I am not as harsh, nor am I any longer into the pain.

Before I met Arianna I had been asked several times to play by different Masochist, and I did give it some great thought but I had to pass. It was just not me any longer, I no longer had to desire or the need to inflict pain. There are times when my mind wonders  about the relationship I had with Sherri, and I think man what the fuck were you thinking. How could you of done some of the things you did? At that point in my life what made me tick?

The willingness to give, maybe the pain in her eyes, and she never showed one tear. With the cracking of the single tail whip, the twelve pound flogger with BB’S on the end. Speculum’s in both holes at the same time, double fisting, forcing her to eat pussy, or blow some stranger, and things I do not wish to share at this time.

She was my first real slave my first and only true masochist, I gained great knowledge from her, but it was a relationship I knew would not last. Almost seven years and I never once fucked her, not sure why there was just something about her, I was not attracted to her in that way. She did suck a lot of cock though daily.

It took me a long time to realize that not every slave or submissive was a masochist, many thought I was abusive, which is far from the truth. Then I began meeting other Doms, and finely an awesome mentor. Then and only then did I learn the difference. The caring part I had to learn on my own.

As we grow older we have the need for more, we need something deeper, and real. The control is the main factor. I am not sure what makes me tick, but I spent way to much time trying to figure it out. I am me and I will never change.

Today while I am strict, I am also fair. I do not change rules to fit my needs. I try to talk through mistakes, because beating is not always the answer. Many are to quick about grabbing a belt or a whip, as a way to correct. Many times a good verbal scolding works much better

BDSM has many different levels that is why it is so easy to find the place we belong, any kink you can think of is out there, and chances are someone shares that same kink with you, but as in any relationship it has to be a give and take.

A slave has no rights, none. A slave gives everything in hopes they will not be abused or misguided. There is no second guessing, even if the owner is wrong. If we as Dominants make a mistake we have to fix it. I myself fix problems before they become problems. We Arianna and I have zero stress in our life. There is no drama between my ex-wife and I none. We even had her over for dinner last week.

You enter a relationship as Master and Slave. I will state I made no demands on what Arianna would call me. She asked if she could call me Master, at times she calls me her Owner

Over a period of a month maybe a little longer, I controlled every movement Arianna made. Bathroom, eating and what to eat, how to dress, walk, talk, what time to go to bed, what time to get up, and yes I controlled her money. I will say this, Arianna does contribute to the house, but I do not take her hard earned money, I stated that I controlled what she spent.

The training was not purely sexual, most of the training consisted of conversation, communication. Teaching her my way, my rules and yes my protocols.

It was exactly two months into our relationship, I invited a M’s couple out to dinner. This was Arianna’s first test, on protocol and etiquette. She passed with flying colors. My friends loved her. Shortly after that I invited an M’s couple over to the house and Arianna would be the host for the evening, again she passed, and the couple loved her, the slave really really loved her. Four months into our relationship we met a Domme for dinner it was her Birthday, again the Domme was very impressed with how Arianna carried herself. at that time we began to attend local events, munchs and MAST meetings. MAST Masters and Slaves Together, a great bunch of people, again Arianna was awesome, when someone did not understand what I was saying I allowed her to step in.

To fully control someone is a huge huge task, a task not many understand or wish to understand, nor is it a task that many want. With me it is a need, a deep craving. I do not even think of my wants, because all of my needs are met.

A short time ago I shared Ariannas rules with a few subs who followed me, the rules were not sexually based. Rules are meant to help. We as Dominants take ones bad habits and replace with good ones.

So think about this Arianna has no rights, no say, nor does she want. That is the key, she does not want, she is giving and she has the trust that I will not mislead or abuse the situation.  If a problem arises and when I take care of it 95% of the time Arianna does not even have a clue. Everything is on a need to know basis. Now if I ran across something I needed advice about, she would be the first and only one I would turn to, but so far that has not happened.

Every day when I arrive home, I walk through the door, Arianna is nude and kneeling. I did not ask for this nor did I require. She does it because she has the need. I walk into the kitchen to sit, my cold drink is in place waiting, she takes off my hat, pen, name tag, then shoes. Dinner is promptly put on the table. Arianna does not begin to eat until I have taking the first bite. Once finished with dinner, shower time. When I finish Arianna drys me off, my night clothes are laid out on the bed. Time to relax. Before bed a huge glass of ice water is placed on the table beside me. Once in bed we talk more about our day, I want to know whats on her mind, this is her time to talk about anything and everything that’s on her mind, her free time to express herself.

Okay I get anything I want without question, be it in everyday life, sexual, play time. When it comes to sex there are no limits, I just do not push her farther than she can go. There is no arguing, of any kind, although I do know at times I do get on her nerves, I just get the eye role she does not think I see.

There are really very few true submissives or slaves, and fewer real dominants. Once into a relationship most find it is not their cup of tea.

There are those who are quick to judge, because they either do not understand, or they believe the slave is weak, which is far from the truth. We judge what we do not understand. You would not want anyone to judge you would you?

Most other relationships I do not understand more so when it comes to a D’s type of relationship, but I do not judge, if it works for you then so be it. While I do find Pony Play interesting, I do not understand the concept, or what someone would get out of such a lifestyle, but it works for them, I am still not going to judge unless your pony takes a huge dump in my living room floor.

I keep an open mind when it comes to others, our kinks are all different, our needs, it would be much better if we could just all get long.

 

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Vile

Is There Really A Difference In Daddy Doms

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, anger, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bond, Cherish, Collars, control, controlling, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Dominants, events, fetlife, slave, submissive, swinger club, Under Consideration on August 5, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Over the past 10 years or so Daddy Doms have become very popular. going back to the mid 80’s you were either a Top, a Bottom , a Master or Slave. The word submissive rarely came to surface.

Most if not all clubs were invitation only, and you had to know someone to even be considered. In the early 90’s there was a swingers club here local called charlie woods. A very nice couple ran the place, but if you wanted to attend you had to exchange a couple of emails, then a phone call, then finely meet in person for an interview. This was to keep all the wackos out.  Although it was not a private club they did have a set of standards.

Myself at that time had a name out in the community, I was really feared by most, although that is not what I was trying to accomplish it just happened. Then there were not that many what you would call hardcore Sadist, nor were there very many hardcore Masochist far and few between. Since I had only really been with one slave who was a Masochist that is pretty much all I knew.

Since then I have calmed down a lot, what use to get me off as far as pain really does not interest me any longer. I take a softer stance, and a much different out look on D’s and M’s.

So over the years the lifestyle branched out and different names began to pop up, Dominant, Master, Poly, Hetroflexible which means anything is game on. Then came the switch which to this day I do not understand, more so when it comes to the male Dominant.

If you look at some of the fetlife profiles some of the sexual orientation is just unreal, and the list of names they are either associated with protecting, or even under consideration. I have seen as many as 20 names. Master Bob is protecting Slave Karman who lives three thousand miles away. Or Master Gary is considering Slave Kathy who lives in another country, even better being collard by someone you have never even met.

Then along comes the Daddy Dom, I have filled and enjoyed this role, many do not understand the concept or the mindset of the relationship. Even today when I talk to some they still consider it to be gross, acting out incest. Conversation over.

So we have the Daddy Dominant, then we have the Dominant. We both want the same for ours. We both want improvement, we both set goals, we both want to see ours excel in everything. We are both there for support, we both care, we both communicate. So the question is. Is there really any difference?

We both step in to fill a void, we both step in to take control, we both earn respect, and we both give respect. We both praise when one has done well, and we both punish when a rule is broken.

You call one Daddy the other calls one Master. In the lifestyle much of the past is forgotten, but things change everyday, we grow, and our needs are different. Even in a relationship our needs change our kinks change, so it if very important to be with someone you can openly communicate with.

I do know today Daddy Doms are not as strict, most are forgiven very easy, maybe scolded but rarely punished, so most baby girls are submissive, very few are slaves.

While at a munch sometime ago I met a Daddy Dom and we were outside talking, he had just met his Little girl, and we were talking about the difference. Then the arguing thing came up, he said they did argue at times, which I do not understand, but to each their own, if it works then so be it.

We all want ours to excel, be better. So why is it that we are so different when the only difference is a Title that most self impose on themselves instead of it being given. I am Master Johnny and you will respect me. Um yea okay.

A couple of years ago, and what a small world a guy called me out of the blue, he had gotten my phone number from a slave I use to live with, at that time I did fill the Daddy Dom role, not so much because I liked it or needed it, it was what she needed. Anyway I jump in my car drive some 60 miles, I walk up to the door and I hear yelling and screming, I am thinking WOW really WTF. So I knock and this guy answers the door he is a lot taller than I am which is not hard to be, he invites me in and the living room and kitchen is a mess broken glass all over the place. The Slave just looks at me very surprised to see that I am even there. I am not sure at this point why I was even called, besides my name being brought up in his face several times a day. They start yelling again and I am just amazed

So I tell her to shut her cock sucker up and sit down, and when she did sit down this guy just looked at me and the room got very quite. I said what the fuck is going on? How did you get my number? Why did you even call me?  They fought everyday, which to this day I do not understand because while with me that was not her demeanor, nor was it her personality, but I suppose if you push the right buttons anything is possible.

He could not believe the control I still had even after not seeing her for over a year. The bottom line was it was all about respect, the respect I had earned, and not demanded. I truly thought after seeing her I would have feelings, but nah the past is the past. If you live in the past you are stuck, and your past will not allow you to move forward.

At one time he had even asked me to mentor him which lasted all of two or three days, it is all good, I had enough on my plate. I really did not need anymore task, and to this day he is still single.

It does not matter what role you play in your relationship it boils down to respect. Respect is earned you cannot demand it. Okay sure you can demand and the giving can be fake but if that cranks your tractor then go for it.

I can really see no difference in the two types of Doms, in the end we both want the same things.

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Vile

Find Your Own Bitch

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, bdsm, communication, control, controlling, Discipline, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, events, Honesty, Master, Masters, Owned Slave, Protocol public, slave, submissive on July 31, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have not found the reason, but men want what someone else has. Most men are willing to lose everything over some ass. Wife, kids, house, half of their pay check over some pussy.

What really gets me is no one forced anyone to say I Do, No one forced the man to ask a woman to marry him, but the vowels only remain true until he sees something else he wants. Willing to risk everything, be it married for a year or twenty years a man will walk away from everything without a care.

Now on the other side of the pasture, the male will stray, make great promises to the female who is on the sideline , but he will stand firm because he has to much to lose. He has not a care what e is doing to someone else, or how he is wrecking their life. Once the other makes a demand he steps aside, your emails begin to slow it takes hours or days for him to answer your text. Then in most cases even if she does go to his wife she will stand by her man. Maybe this is something she is use to, but she is not going to lose everything she has, we have moved into a material world.

I have had men ask me directly if they could fuck Arianna, or if they could have her for one night, or they drop their slave off, make a switch for a night. Are you kidding me?

We were invited to a couples house some time ago, and the last text I received was, well if she is not ready for a full swap there is no reason in coming. Okay we did not go, then I get a text we are at the beach, can we stop by, sure we are home but we are just having coffee.

You the Dominant make a list, you make a list of everything you want in a submissive or slave, it should be a page long. You stick to that list.

Likes spanking, likes ball gags, likes some form of humiliation, ahh a must swallows, likes anal, able to follow rules protocols. Open communication, loyal, smart, intelligent, what type of build are you looking for? Petite, average, a little chubby, fat or Oh My God.

You stick to this list, because if you do not your newly relationship is going to fail, if you over look or cross anything out on your list, you are settling for less, and it will not last. The problem is many will settle for what ever and when they think they have found someone better, they cast their partner aside like a toy.

It does not bother me when other men talk to Arianna, I am far from jealous, and to this point no one has really stepped over any boundaries. All comments have been made to me. Most who know me will not even bring the subject up.

Men see the outer shell, they see nothing more, The inside of the shell could be way to much to handle, then when things go south it is always the females fault things did not work out.

I am like man what happened? Oh she is a stupid bitch, the cunt cant think straight, she has issues I don’t want to deal with, she was not a real slave> It goes on and on, it is never the Dominants fault. Because all they saw was a piece of ass.  Once the shell is cracked open it is like what the fuck.

Okay it is true many not all but many who are submissive or a slave do have issues I will call it. I said this in a comment earlier. Some suffer from depression, some are bi-polar,  some Anxiety. Then before entering such a relationship we as Dominants have to decide if we want to enter such. If we agree we have to put a plan together on how to combat these issues , once the plan is in place you have to be willing to stick with it. I can tell you in most cases the good out weighs the bad.

Calm cool and collective, it is not hard, being in control, being self sufficient being able to think outside of your dick.

The list stick to it, I searched for almost two years because I would not alter my list, almost two years. I was just about to give up and say fuck it. I will find someone not let them move in, have a piece of ass from time to time give out a few rules, and not have to worry about the responsibility. A perfect world you would think.

Then I met Arianna, I remember the first time she got out of her car, I was thinking fuck me running look at what I found. Blood rushed down to my dick so fast I got dizzy, fucking incredible. So we talked, and we talked , and we talked. When she left I was thinking she wont be back not a fucking chance in another world. Then some hours later I text and said well thank you I had fun, I did not think I was the kind of Dom you were looking for. The reply was can I come back over tomorrow.

As I wonder through other blogs I cannot believe some of the comments that are being left. Are these actually grown men or are they hacking their parents account? Are these really Dominant men who are suppose to be setting the example? Are these leaders, who are wanting to take control in a real relationship?

You know I have never done the cyber thing, I cannot picture myself sitting in a chair and jacking off to a bunch of words, nor have I ever had phone sex. I am a hands on man I like to be able to reach out and touch.

This is an idea take your list to a real Slave trainer, and tell this trainer what your looking for, have him find you a slave, train her to fit your needs and then he can hand the slave over to you, eh let me know how that works out.

Find your own bitch, take the time to find who and what your looking for. Train the way you see fit, fill that void you have been missing.

You have no idea how pathetic one looks when the other Dom or so called Dom is trying to moving in on another’s slave, it truly makes one look weak.

Vile

Is Old Guard Real ?

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, Alt.com, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Safety, Breaking Rules, Collar, Collarme.com, communication, control, controlling, Conversation, Discipline, Dominants, dress, Dress Protocol, Ego, etiquette, events, Gorean lifestyle, Gorean Master, Gorean Portocol, Honesty, Kink, kinkster, kinky, Leather Guard, Master, Masters, morals, munchs, Old Guard, Old Leather Guard, older Dominants, Open Minded, Private Protocol, Protocol, Protocol public, Rules, Safe, Safe and Sane, Self-Discipline, slave, submissive, TPE on July 24, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Many of the new today will argue that Old Guard is just a Myth, it never was and never will be. When in fact I do believe and have spoken to elders who were a part of Old Guard, in the late 60’s through the early 80’s

Old Guard refers to the leather community mainly the gay community. I myself am not into the leather scene, nor am I a part of any leather family since most have blown the protocol way out of text. In my eyes a lack of respect of what use to be.

Most of the Leather Family’s today are known as pansexual , you can google that. Unlike Old Guard, today’s Leather family’s welcome most anyone, without even really knowing anything about them. In the Old Guard days there were strict rules and Protocols to be followed. The Old Guard was a closed community and you had to become a member. Before membership was allowed one had to learn all rules and protocols and follow them, if not you got the boot.

Over the years we have strayed, we have lost the meaning of BDSM and it has falling more into just a kink, a past time, weekend warriors, bedroom only. Which is okay but the problem is everyone is right, no one is wrong. When someone hears how a slave or submissive lives they are just blown away and cannot believe they would allow someone to treat them a certain way.

It is not that a slave or submissive in today’s times are part of or believe in Old Guard, they just fall into their Dominants ways of doing things. Being strict, having rules, even protocols both public and private is perfectly okay, when there is no physical or mental abuse involved.

It is not that we take the lifestyle differently some are just more serious than others when it comes to the world of D’s and M’s. How Master Joe runs his house is on him, I do not and will not judge.

Back in the day a Dominant had to make his way through the ranks, there were steps that had to be taking. If a submissive or bottom had more experience than the Dom the sub out ranked the Dom, yea sounds weird. The problem is today’s Dominants want to start out as president they are right and everyone else is wrong.

Unlike today back in the Old Leather Guard there were dress codes, and they were enforced. Arianna and I have attended some local groups and I cannot believe they way some of the sub/slaves come dressed, more so the way their master allows them out of the house. Arianna has pointed out how mouthy some are, how she cannot believe how some disrespect their Doms.

Today it would be almost impossible to put together an exclusive group for meetings or teachings because of how BDSM  has branched out. Most groups come and go because of a dictatorship or just huge egos. Most people today are close minded when it comes to how others live as well

Old Guard when in a social setting it was the Dominant with the most experience who led the conversation, on the other side if the bottom had more experience they led the conversation, if equal the Dom was giving the go ahead.

When walking the submissive walked one or two steps behind, remember you are not equal in a sense. A Dominant would never think of hugging or shaking the hand of a submissive, nor would the submissive make direct eye contact, though the Dominant would. A Dominant would never think of touching another who was owned and collard, there was a respect thing.

Protocols is a lost art today, but what I expect if out in public a Dominant or Submissive should not assume anything. A Dominant should not just walk up to a submissive and strike up a conversation, they same with a submissive. It is however proper and okay to ask. Some couples have no protocols at all, nor do they wish to, this is where the lack of respect comes into play when it comes to what others believe. I have had people say they could never live like Arianna nor would they want to. What we have as a Master and Slave is very unique and special.

Old Guard when a Dominant was being served there were two ways, one palm out and flat drink on palm, the other the sub would kneel head down and arms extended making the offering. Depending on the protocol the sub could either leave or had to ask permission.

Those who play on the internet who belong to sites such as Collarme.com Alt.com BDSM.com and so on generally stay on those sites with very little real in person interaction, those who get lucky enough to find a submissive or Slave generally fuck it up because they have no real clue what a in person interaction is. It does not take long for the Submissive to realize they have been played. The so called Dominant will generally put the blame of the submissive when it comes to the relationship not working.

When I speak about myself at times I mention old school, and not old guard. Old School just means I hold certain values when it comes to the lifestyle, I give and expect respect. I set my life to a certain standard as I do with my Slave. I expect when out my slave is giving the up most respect and she will do the same in return.

So in closing I think we should all get back to the basics when it comes to the lifestyle. Yes we do need rules, yes we do need guidelines, yes we do need dress codes, yes we do need protocols. More so we do need to respect others.

Coming in at the top of those who truly live the lifestyle with the fullest respect are those of the Gorean lifestyle. If you should ever have the honor of meeting a Gorean Master or Slave you would be truly amazed. Old Leather Guard probably not since the lifestyle is based on a line of books, but the lifestyle is very strict and respected by many. I am not saying everyone should live the Gorean way, but if you study up on it, it will give you a way different out look and perspective of their lifestyle.

We should all come together as one, and set standards, keep the lifestyle proud, keep the fakers out. It could be done.

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Vile