Ahhh the fucking Drama with Ex’s, it can go on and on for years, and can cause great devastation in future relationships.
While I did meet Bea prior to my divorce, we did not take our relationship to a sexual level until I was divorced and moved out. While I was no longer in love with my then wife, I respected her enough not to go behind her back, My son played a huge role in that as well. After all I am to set the example..
If you start such a relationship, the good news is now you are getting what you were not at home. The bad news is you will get caught. I got caught, it did not matter that the relationship was not sexual. I still got caught, and my ex ran off at the mouth, not only in front of my son, but everyone else as well, not that I cared, I was more worried about my son.
So our divorce was clean, she had asked me to move out, due to me coming clean about my lifestyle, and what my needs were. I am also proud to say, I have not missed a child support payment in almost nine years, so all you dead beat dads go fuck yourself. Although we had agreed on about 340.00 a month there are many times I double or triple that. How much does it cost to raise a child ? Plus the things I buy on the side, I just spent 900 dollars on a surfboard kit, that him and I will build together. He will be an eagle scout next yr. He makes Honor role every year. I play a huge part in his life.
My Ex hated Bea with a passion, she saw first hand how different Bea was treated, the things I bought Bea, and yes how submissive Bea was when my Ex was around. I had hoped they would get along, but nah that would never happen.
My Ex and I have a good relationship, although we do not talk much, but when problems arise with my son, we communicate very well. After my son spends time with me, my Ex does drill him, but there is never any information, so whats the harm.
So a year into our relationship we were going good, even talking marriage, then the Ex Bomb, landed.
My Ex called me and informed me her engine in her car had blown up, she had noway to work, nor to take my son to his after school programs. So I as a father stepped in.
I picked up my Ex, and we went to s Saturn Dealership, I said I have 10K pick out a good used car. I bought her a car, now this is on top of the child support mind you. It was my son I was looking after.
Here is where the shit hit the fan, I had been promising Bea a new car for sometime, but for what ever reason we just never got around to it, Bea had a nice Eclipse anyway, I paid for the Gas, the insurance, and any maintenance.
So over dinner I told Bea what I had done the day earlier, I could tell this was not going over very well. Although Bea was smoking hot, I mean killer hot, she was very insecure.When I first met Bea she was a little overweight , and in 8 months had lost about 55lbs.
Even after I explained why I bought the car, I could tell it was not sitting easy, she did not blow up, scream or throw things, it was just her eyes.
I had to keep them separated, like two females cats locked in a bathroom. Bea was very protective towards me, and no one had better say anything bad about me, for an introvert she could fucking blow up.
Now the entire time of our relationship. We did not have one ARGUMENT, not one, we did not yell at each other, nor did we make threats. I let her go out with her friends, this was very important, even if I was displeased with some, she still needed that.
So into our sixth yr of our relationship is when things began to break down. I would no longer punish her for the things she did, I would just simply scold. What happens then? She begins to lose respect, once this road starts if you do not catch it in the early stages, there will come a time, when it is just out of control..
If your having Drama with the Ex, stop it put your foot down, or you will never have a lasting relationship, because your submissive will always be second, she will never be number one.
My Ex is very sick now, although she still works there will come a time, when she will not be able to, now she is in stage four kidney failure. There are times when she gets bad infections and is out of work for sometime. So going into our sixth year, Bea and I, my Ex got sick and was out of work for about 6 months.
At that time, Not only did I pay child support, but I made her house payment every month as well, until she got back on her feet. Well it was my house but the great State Of Florida thought she needed it .
Now keep in mind Bea was in school, and she paid nothing, and I gave her spending money as well, but now I was tapped out.
In six and a half yrs Bea had never opened any of my mail she would not dare, but this time she opens a bank statement, which shows 981.00 a month for five months on top of the child support, which I paid that in cash, tax purposes.
So I get off work, I open the door she greets me, dinner was nice, ran my bath for me. Then come talk time, I sat an hour aside everyday to just talk. To talk about anything.
Well here we go, Bea ask me, are you paying your Ex more than child support, well the first thing that comes to mind, is me being upfront about the car, which in five yrs I still got reminded daily.
My first thoughts and words without hesitation. Absolutely not. Well she hands me the bank statement, and she says well I guess your not fucking her either. Wow, I was busted. I was only busted because I was not upfront and honest from the start.
So in the end my lack of discipline and the lack of being honest I believe led to the downfall of our relationship.
At that time I did not feel that Bea had any business of knowing. Everything was provided for her, food clothing, car, gas, ins, everything.
If I had not let my feelings get in the way, had I not lost control, of our relationship, I believe I could of weathered out the storm, but because of the above and not being honest, is what caused the crash…