Archive for the Finding the right Dominant Category

If Your With The Wrong Dominant

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, Argue, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, communication, control, controlling, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Drama, Finding the right Dominant, In Search Of A Master, problems, slave, submissive on March 16, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Finding the right Dominant or Master very important. Finding the one you click with, the one who has the same needs as well as the same kinks.

The one thing for sure is finding a Dom who is in control of his life and his surroundings . If he cannot control the simple things in life, then how can he control a submissive, slave or Baby girl.

Then you have the Doms with serious anger issues these are ego driven, again they are not in control, but they are controlling you, and you will take what ever is handed out. Either not knowing any better or your just happy to be with someone.

I believe a Dominant just as a submissive can adapt in most situations, I know myself If I truly care about someone I can adapt some, but I am not going to give up my needs to please someone else. Lets say an adult baby, that is not something I would want to be a part of. That is their need, their kink, but there are Doms out there that prefer adult baby’s.

If a Dominant lets say met someone who was a slave but he was looking for a submissive, but he found out they had more in common then he would be willing to adapt, change up his game a little, a baby girl the same. This goes more towards a Dom who has been in the lifestyle for sometime.

If your looking for a Dom or Master and you meet one, your main question should be. What can you do for me ? What do you have to offer? How are you going to help me ?

Before moving into any type of relationship it is very important to find out your new Doms temperament. If a Dominant or Master tells you he has been in the lifestyle for lets say 10 years but he has anger issues, the truth is probably less than a year. Being in the lifestyle for even 5 years allows a good Dominant to grow. I know myself it took me well over 5 years maybe a little longer before I was able to control what I would call my anger issues. It also took me sometime to realize that I was taking on a huge responsibility, because the mistakes you make effects the submissive your with.

Every Dominant is different, every Daddy Dom is different, as with every Master. We all fall under a different category , we all expect different things from ours, we all have different needs, and wants.

If you are a submissive , Baby Girl or a Slave you have a pretty good feeling to what your looking for. If not you need to sit down and think. Think about how you can see yourself living everyday as the submissive you need to be, what you want out of life and out of a relationship. What kind of rules you need to keep you structured.

A Dominant should have goals in life, he should have high standards  he should have high expectations in life, he should have the need to excel in life. If you have a Dominant who jumps from  submissive to submissive then something is very wrong. This is something you need to question. If you are getting the blame game then chances are he is the one to blame.

If your a Submissive then find a Dominant that fits you. Remember you are the one who makes the decision to enter a relationship. The same with a Baby girl find the daddy that fits you as well as with the slave. Each of us are unique and very much different.

If you are with the wrong Dominant you will never be able to excel in life, you will never have that feeling of being complete.

If you are going to lay on your back and spread your legs, or your going to get on your knees and suck cock, then make sure it is with someone who is going to take care of you and your needs. If your not getting everything you need, why would you give yourself ? Why would you allow yourself to be used ?

Your limits are things you feel strongly about, although some will be pushed it is very important to find the one who will respect what limits you have in place. If you tell a Dom that anal sex if off limits, and he pauses and says that is fine with me but deep down its not, down the road it will come up again, because you have something he wants and you said no.

If your not a Masochist why would you hook up with a sadist, or if your a masochist why would you hook up with a Dom who is not a sadist. In real life there are very few sadist who are Doms, and very few masochist who are submissive.

I know a Daddy Dom who moved in with a Masochist Baby Girl, he was not a sadist and he felt guilty doing some of the things she needed. It did not work that was not the only factor, but that would of been the killer.

I have stressed many times it is very important to get to know someone before entering a relationship. Make sure your both on the same page

You have spent time finding the right Dom , or Master, and your willing to do just about anything to make it work. Well the same goes for him. You should make sure he is ready to enter a relationship. He should be problem free, drama free, no problems with ex’s because if he as any of these things going on, how can he possibly control you, how could this be fair to you. Why you you be brought into all of his problems, his fucked up world.

In your search you may meet several before you find the right one, or you may meet several and decide the first or second one is the one for you. If you ask questions and your not getting the answers you think you should be getting then get up and walk out you owe him nothing.

Image I love this pic

Vile