Archive for the Flogger Category

New Toys For Arianna

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, Anal Plug, anticipation, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, BDSM Rules, blindfold, blow job, Bondage, butt plug, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, Dominance, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominant, endorphin's, FaceBook Vile Woods, Flogger, Floggers, Fox Tail Butt Plug, fuck hole, Gagged, Manipulation, Master And Slave, Mind Fuck, music, punish, Punishment, Rules, Safe and Sane, session, slave, Sub Drop, sub-space, Submission, submissive, submit, sucking cock on August 31, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I love Sensory Depravation it can make the mind think of some crazy things. Under the right conditions you can also reach sub-space.

When people talk about sub-space many think there has to be pain involved , and that is so far from the truth it is not funny..

I was talking to someone the other day about planting a seed. Your planting a thought, the thought then becomes a need. This is a way to get something across without really having to say anything, and yes it works.

If that seed is planted you need pain to reach sub-space, guess what ? Then that will be the only way to achieve reaching that point.

In reality reaching sub-space is about getting into ones mind , once your able to do so, the fun is unlimited.

Many also confuse reaching an orgasm during play is part of sub-space, and that is far from the truth as well..

The pain side of things, the body knows when it is being hurt, and there are steps the body takes to protect itself. Once you start feeling pain, your body sends most of your blood to your abdominal area, causing you to get cold, and confusion sets in, and you believe your reaching sub-space. Even during impact play, blood is rushed to your stomach area… Impact play that includes breast, pussy, or ass, all the body knows its being hurt and it is trying to protect itself..

Sub-space is an art, sub-space is the ability to get into someone’s mind, be it erotic or causing confusion. It is how intense the play session is, and this can be done without pain.. The key is to get those endorphin’s flowing, once you have hit that process the sky is the limit.

You start by taking senses away, sight, hearing, are the two most valuable, then of course touch and smell, but you take sight away, and you bring in a little fear, the mind begins to wonder. Music is always good even being played a little loud, losing sight and not being able to comprehend what is going on around you, causes confusion.

I myself do not enjoy marking up my property, I do not enjoy leaving bruises, this is mainly because if something went wrong, and for some reason I had to explain what happened, yea just not good, because even when consensual, sometimes the law does not see it as being consensual.

A good thing to do is to get familiar with BDSM and the Law, I have blogged about this before. This is why I have mentioned it is very important to get active in the local community. You meet people Doctors, Lawyers, you meet people from every walk of life. It is good to know the right people just in case..

Okay I am sorta of bouncing around here today, so back to the toys. Here lately, Arianna’s needs have began to grow even more.

When I first met her I explained BDSM was like a drug, the more you experience the more you need. The more control you give, the more you want to continue giving..

It is a drug and it is a very powerful drug. The one thing you need to be sure of is your dealer is in full control.. Because if he is not you can get hurt and you can get hurt bad.

BDSM is a mind thing, getting in your head, not only getting in your head but having the ability to stay there, get inside move around, look around see what’s going on. Being able to figure you out, know what makes you think, and then being able to toy around a little.

This is achieved through trust, real trust, I mean trusting someone with your life, because if you are not there, sub-space will not be there.
Trust, would your Dominant take a bullet for you? Would you take a bullet for your Dominant? that is trust.

hood

The seed was planted, a couple of days ago Arianna brought up the subject about wanting a hood, but now it has become a need. You plant the seed and you leave it alone.

Arianna loves Butt Plugs but she wanted one with a tail, so I placed an order.
tail

This will surely bring out the submission on a higher level, being home, nude and being instructed to insert and wear.

The new Vibrator I picked out along with the hood and the fox tail, her old one is almost ready to retire. No woman should be without a Vibrator.

pink

I am also looking for a new flogger, but yea I am not paying 90 bucks for one so I will just keep shopping…

Okay I know I jumped around a lot I hope everyone is having an awesome weekend..

One more thing I am preparing more interviews. I have a Dominant who is married with children and he will explain how D’s works in his home.
Also the famous Cinnimon will be dropping in and helping me out with the Baby Girl thing, and helping us understand more. I wish more Baby girls would step forward but she is going to be awesome…

Much Love
vile

Making Love Nah , Having Sex Nah , Just Raw Fucking

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, Alt.com, Arianna, bdsm, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, Cheating Dominant, Collarme.com, communication, control, Dating, Deception, Discipline, Dominant, Drama, Emotions, Fake Dominants, fifty shades of grey, Flogger, Floggers, Honesty, Kink, kinky, Loyal, Manipulation, Married Dominant, masochist, Master, Master And Slave, Pain, Patience, punish, Punishment, pussy, Rules, Self-Discipline, sex, slave, sub-space, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Text, TPE, Vile Woods on FaceBook on April 20, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Arianna cooking dinner I get home from work walk over bend her over and push three finger inside her pussy, slowly fucking her until she starts to breath a little heavy, then I just simply walk away going about my business.

Being able to just snap your fingers and your submissive drops to the floor without question, even better tell them to go to the bedroom and strip and spread you will be there in a minute. Crawl on top bust your nut and get off. It can be that simple.

The thing is every Dominant , every Master can have it this way.  No questions asked, never. You can lead and they will follow you where ever you go.

Being a Dominant is much more than barking our orders, going to wal mart and buying a dog collar, changing rules when no rules are being broken and you want to punish.

I saw a post on Facebook not long ago a submissive was going to meet her Dom, and he was figuring out different ways to punish her, just for the sake of punishing.

The truth is most of you who except bruises except only because you think that is part of the D’s lifestyle , then there are those who except them because you want the relationship to work, so you will take what ever. Then there are those who truly enjoy them. There are Masochist who truly enjoy pain, there are those who need pain as an escape a way to release, but for the most, many of you just except it.

I heard some time ago that pain was needed to reach sub-space and that my friends is so far from the truth. There is nothing written anyplace that says pain is need to reach sub-space.

Sub-space is mental, sub-space is the connection the two of you have with each other, sub-space depends on how far your Dominant can get into your head, sub-space depends on the intensity of play, and it does not have to do anything with pain.

Okay so lets take the words BDSM we have the kink, we have the sex, we have the control, we have the bondage, the floggers, whips, cuffs, ahh the St Andrews cross. The list goes on and on, and while it is true all of this is a huge plus it is not the foundation of the relationship.

The foundation first and for most is the communication we have, second is the control we show at home and while out. Being honest, loyal, most of all truthful. You learn to guide they will follow and follow without question….. The rest is just a bonus, and the bonus’s just keep getting better and better. The longer you are who you say you are, the more your subs or slaves wall will slowly come down.. Once those walls come down your relationship has no end, it will continue to grow.

All these fake dudes the Fifty shade dudes who do not have a clue, the married dudes who do not have a clue. Their life is so fucked up trying to juggle two lives, hiding everything hoping they don’t get caught. Or the guy who thinks he is King Dom after reading Fifty Shades now he wants to be king master and he is on the hunt. These are all short lived relationships. The married one is not going to leave his wife, more so if he’s not investing anything into the relationship.  If your his submissive and your living alone he should be paying for part of your upkeep he should be helping with the home. I am telling you this from a mans point of view, if he is married he will not leave his wife, he has way to much to lose.

Listen to this you who are seeing married Doms, you are only getting one side of the story about how bad their home life is, you are getting their story. If their life was so bad, they would have already moved out, yes just like I did, they would of already left their wife and kids behind. . He can go on and on about how bad his marriage is, how much he hates his wife, but the bottom line is he is still there and he will be there when you are gone.

Now my question is how can you sleep at night with a clear conscious? How can you sleep at night knowing what you are doing to his family, destroying what she has worked so hard to build. Because what ever a man has it is because of his woman, it is because of his wife. Just something to think about because it is not fair that she does not have the ability to share her side of it. If his marriage is so bad put your foot down, put a time limit that he has to move out, then see what happens. It is not fair to destroy something his wife has worked so hard building, and the bad thing is she does not have a clue that things are so bad, because he will not communicate with her. Now if you think your the only one he is seeing you are stupid, and I know you are thinking the same thing in the back of your head. When you go days with out a call or email, or even a fucking text.

On the other hand if you do not care, and you are that cold you don’t have any feelings then go for it. To each their own I am not judging anyone, have a little compassion.

If he will fuck around on his wife, guess what ?

Now all the trouble you girls go through someone made a comment just a little bit ago.

You are a minority Vile… and are one of the rare ones to do it right.

Okay that can be a true statement but it is really not, you have to weed yourself through all the fake ones. It is like when you open a door and it is full of horse shit, your thinking fuck there has to be a fucking horse somewhere in here. So you open a door and there is a room full of Doms you think one of them has to be real. You have to be able to think with a clear head. You have to have a plan in place before you start your search.

Fuck Collarme.com fuck ALT.com both of those are meat markets to men, and that is exactly what they think. Now are some real sure they are but very few and far between. You have to be willing not to settle for second best, and many times you get the feeling something is not right but you go right along with it. You continue to go along with it even though you feel something is wrong hoping your thoughts are wrong, and you know most of the time they are not.

If you do not live together you cannot truly know the fulfillment of living a D’s style relationship, to know what it is like waking up every morning with your Master, following his rules, his guidelines there is no way to experience it. The little you get while on the phone and it is phone sex mostly, the weekend out of a month if that, maybe a night or even just a couple of hours. You will most likely spend your Birthday alone, as with all of the holidays.

So no it is not that I am a minority , because there are plenty of me out there. It is just you the submissive or slave taking the time to weed thought the bad to get to the good. There are Dominants out there that will more than fit your needs. There are Dominants out there who will treat you with the respect you deserve, who will treat you as their princess.

For you Doms in the lifestyle for a while, just learning or the Fifty Shades, if you play your cards right, the submissive is for your taking. They want to be used and used on a regular basis, nothing brings more pleasure to a submissive to be used. Some of you guys just kill me.

Lady’s all you need is a plan.

Image

Vile

 

 

So The Universe Gave Us A Dominant

Posted in Advice, anger, bdsm, BDSM Collar, Collar, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Dominant, Flogger, Love, Loyal, Patience, Punishment, Rules, Safe, Safe Word, slave, submissive, The Universe Gave Us A Dominant on March 3, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

The Universe looked down one morning and clearly saw the submissive was lost, so the Universe gave us the Dominant.

The Universe said I need a man who can work a 50 hour work week and still keep his home in good running order, so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who can be very loving, but strict when needed, and be able to control his temper and emotions and still remain strong, so the Universe gave us the Dominant.

The Universe said I need a man who can implement rules and give structure , and make the home feel safe, and offer security with open arms. So the Universe gave us the Dominant.

The Universe said I need a man who can talk on all levels, interact well with others , and offer his wisdom when needed. So the Universe gave us the Dominant.

The Universe said I need a man who is good with rope, one who is able to tie a knot and do it well, a man who can be artistic while exploring the world of bondage. So the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who knows how to spank, and do it well, so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The Universe said I need a man who is as strong as a Bull , a man with the memory of an elephant , the wisdom of an owl, A man with enough knowledge to fill a terabyte hard drive , so the Universe gave us the Dominant.

The Universe said the submissive needs a leader, someone who is understanding, caring, loving, a man who is clearly in control, and not controlling, so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who will put his submissive first no matter what , so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who will take what he wants but give much more in return, so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who is skilled with a flogger, and know that spanking is meant to be erotic , so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man with a clear understanding of the true meaning of a collar, a man who knows a collar is earned and not giving. So the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man after hours of play who will provide aftercare, so the universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who can stand tall and not back down, a man who can debate with the best and still remain calm, cool , and collective, and walk away proud no matter the outcome. So the Universe gave us the Dominant.

The universe said I need a man who will hold his submissive when things do not go right, a man who will provide positive reinforcement, and make everything alright. So the universe gave us the Dominant.

Image

Vile

Shut Up And Fuck Her

Posted in 24/7, Argue, Arianna, ass fucking, bdsm, Being fucked, Bondage, butt plug, Consensual, Consistency, control, Daddy, Daddy Dom, doggy style, Dominants, Flogger, fucking, Giving Head, http://mastermdsg.wordpress.com, Joseph McNamara, Lube, MAST, Master, Masters, Masters And Slaves Together, men begging, Mynx's Sir, nipple pump, pussy, sadandmas4u.wordpress.com, session, sex, Sexually Broken, Sir franco bolli, slave, snake bite kit, Southern Sir, SouthernSir, submissive, sucking cock on January 4, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

What is so special about the lifestyle is we are all different, we all come from different DNA, well unless your from West Virgina. Bad joke I know.Every Dominant is different we all have a different approach, we all act different, we train different, we have different needs, and wants. We come from different parts of the world, different cultures. We grew up with different back grounds. Most of all we look for different things when it comes to a slave or submissive.So what I am going to do is point out four other Dominant and you will clearly be able to see the difference, if your not already following them. We are all different in every sense. The way we speak, the way we put words down, and our thoughts on relationships are very different.I am sure our rules differ, our protocols differ. The thing is we are five Dominants and Masters who take the lifestyle very serious. Another thing is we are all in a relationship. Most are settled in and some are just getting to that point.If you submissive’s and Slaves would just pay attention and read. Reading is the easy part, taking it all in and putting it to good use is the hard part.Just as I was speaking last night at the MAST meeting. I am a Mother fucker to live with or so it would seem. I am strict, I do not give in I refuse to give in. If you can survive 90 days with me, you can live with any Dominant or Master. One or two things would happen. You would leave a new woman, a proud woman, a woman ready to face the world and find that special one, or it would BREAK you.Those words SHUT UP AND FUCK HER I mean that. a Happy Slave is a well used Slave, using all three holes. Spanking , tying up, probing holes with objects. In my eye a Slave has three pussy’s I am sure you guessed which holes. All holes and they are for my use when ever I have the want, no questions asked.The first is someone I have a great deal of respect for that would be Joseph McNamara, calm cool and collective, and he deeply cares for his submissive Gemini. He stands true to the lifestyle. His words are somewhat deep, but very structured.http://sadandmas4u.wordpress.com/2013/12/22/dominance-and-submission-happy-holidays-from-joseph-and-gemini-asmsg-spanking-happyholidays/.The second would be southern Sir and he dear submissive Kayla, who at one time I was hoping her name was Traci, but it did not turn out that way. Southern Sir and I again are very different, we both have different styles, we train different, we treat ours much different, but in the end we want the same. That is for ours to succeed.Then we have Sir franco bolli Who is in a newly found relationship with his Princess. They are both seeking their way with each other but I am sure they will find a happy medium. Sir Bolli is more Sensitive than the other four of us, but that is in no way a bad thing. That just means he enjoys expressing his feelings and thoughts more. My hat goes off to both of them.Another I am getting to know is http://mastermdsg.wordpress.com Check out his blog you will see the same he does seem very genuine and most sincere.Then comes okay I have added more than five. but I cannot forget about I believe he is called Mynx’s Sir on word press. The two are on a journey and have a long way to go, but with the path they are on they will be there in no time.I do not expect everyone to agree with me, if you did then something would be wrong, bad wrong. We are all different, all from different parts of the world, but the bottom line is we all want the same out of life.I do not envy those married men who spend their afternoon trying to warm up to their wife in hopes of getting a little at night. Or her causing an argument so she can avoid having sex. You men dug your own grave by cowering  down and giving in, your you no does mean no. The truth is if you would just man up, and take the lead things would be so much better Today I had Arianna in what I call a sexually broken position. Hand cuffs, ankle cuffs, ear plugs in. Blindfold, then I use clear body wrap to go over the mask to make sure she could not see. I placed her on the bed on her side. Rope around the back of her neck down to the ankle cuffs, pulled her legs into her stomach turned her around so her ass was hanging a little off of the bed. Lubed up the 4in butt plug slid it in and I just just back and looked. I looked at what I owned. I then walked up slid my cock in and fucked like it was New Years all over again. I used the flogger a little but I do need a better one. I also used a snake bite kit for the nipples, you leave them on for 10 minutes and they grow three times the normal size.Although sex is not the core of a BDSM relationship and it is just the tip of ours, even at 51 I love to fuck.We do have it made. href=”https://thekinkyworldofvile.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/doggy.jpg”>Image

Vile

 

 

The Difference Between A Master And A Dominant

Posted in 24/7, Argue, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Behavior Modification, being used, Bestslavetraining.com, blog, Collar, Collared Slave, Collars, communication, Consensual, consistent, control, Dominance, Dominants, extreme, Flogger, Franco Bolli, Local events, Master, Masters, Molding, owning a slave, Pansexual, Protocol, punish, Punishment, serve, session, slave, Slave no rights, submissive, The Difference Between A Master And A Dominant, Top and Bottom, Vile on December 25, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

I ran across an Article this am I found on a website I hope you enjoy.

http://www.denversub.com/labels.html

I suppose you could debate the two, who is who and what is what, but if you really think about the difference , the two are only similar in a small aspect of the lifestyle. While Both are Dominant 95% of the time the two live in two totally different worlds.

I will also cover the difference between a slave, submissive and a bottom. All three are very different and all three have different needs.

A Master Is certainly a Dominant , but not all Dominants are Master, within the local community. The term Master is usually those who live with a slave on a 24/7 basis. The title if we were giving one is mostly giving to those who are highly recognized within the community . I do believe that the Master and Slave is wired much different than lets say a Dominant and his submissive. I am not saying one is better than the other, or one has an advantage over the other, our lifestyle are just different.

The Dominant and Submissive. The Submissive , only submits when they choose, the play sessions are talked over before play, The Submissive will say what is allowed and what is not. The submissive will follow some rules but usually in the bedroom only. Once out of the bedroom there is still a Dominance and submissive feeling but not as noticeable as it was during play.

A Master / Slave relationship the Slave Submits once and only once giving up full control over their life. The only rights are those giving to them by there owner or Master, again the is mostly in a 24/7 relationship. The slave gets pleasure from serving their owner, be it helping with the shower, undressing , cooking, cleaning, and yes sexually. Sex between Master and Slave the Slave is more concerned with their owner receiving pleasure than their self, knowing their Master is pleased, is what brings on the feelings they are seeking.

Last night I logged onto FaceBook and I started chatting with another Dominant who also has a blog on wordpress. Franco Bolli. We were talking about the Holidays and he brought this subject up to me, he said.

For me there is a difference between a Master and a Dom, like there is a fundamental difference between a slave and a sub.

Yes he is correct, but those of you who are submissive and new to the lifestyle you really do not have a clue, or maybe you do but your afraid to speak up.You the submissive has the right to submit on your terms, when and where, and how. You have the right to follow what rules you want.

The word Dominant in the lifestyle is relatively new, , or calling someone their Dominant is relatively new going back some 15 years or so, when the pansexual revelation came about.. When BDSM started breaking off into separate groups

So the terms would be Master and Slave, Dominant and Submissive or Top and Bottom, Now the Top and Bottom really differ from the other two, and here is how.

The Bottom will dictate the entire scene , the Bottom will instruct the top , what they can do and what they cannot do, right down to how many times they can be spanked with a belt or flogger. The Bottom can refuse to do certain sex acts or bondage.

Again it is not that anyone is better than the other our lives are just very different. I know even here in the local community some Dominants are called Masters by their Submissive’s, and there is nothing wrong with that, it is what makes your relationship. It is what puts you the submissive in that frame of mind.

Remember the difference between a Slave and a Submissive. Many who are Submissive do not understand how a Slave could live such a life, While a Slave cannot understand how one could only submit at their will. Arianna does not understand those who are submissive, but she respects them. She does not understand how a submissive could talk back to their Dominant, or even argue with them. Arianna knows there would be great consequences if she were to question me, but this is the relationship we have.

Remember the above is just my opinion and nothing more. I have included an article that was written some several years ago That I would like to share, and it speaks about the same subject.

The biggest difference is the COLLAR Like Arianna since she excepted my Collar it has not been off one time. She even wears it to work without question. A Submissive will determine when and where she will wear her collar, if she wears one at all.

One of the best sites out there for information more so those who are new to the lifestyle is Bestslavetraining.com

There is a ton of information it will take you a week to read everything. It will also give you the submissive or slave some ideas on how your Dominant or Master should be,. Read you will truly enjoy.

The slave also goes through what some would call a Behavior Modification process, this happens during training. The way the slave talks, walks, how they act in public, around their owners friends, and yes even sex.

What really got me thinking was what Franco Bolli had said to me about how a Dominant was different than a Master in his eyes or thoughts. You can find him here   http://francobolli666.wordpress.com/

So here is the Article have fun reading maybe it was explained a little better and more detail than I was able to.

The last words are so right, Lets all be kind to each other we Deserve it.

Image I love this position

The article I found below is what I came across this am. All credit goes to.

http://www.denversub.com/labels.html

Master or Dom? / slave or sub?

Labels… we use them… we abuse them.  Disclaimer: this is only one person’s opinion.  You may find it helpful… if not, you may ignore it… Probably the most difficult thing to explain (and some would say impossible) is the difference between the labels we use to define us.  The most common argument occurs with the labels Dominant, Master, slave and submissive.  This page will include opinions… some mine, some borrowed from other sources.  I will attempt to credit those sources where I am able.  If you visit this webpage and see something that was originally yours, please email denversubmissive@aol.com and I will either credit you or remove it, as you wish.

“To be thrilled at the touch of leather, aroused by the sound of harsh words, or satisfied by the security of rigid bondage is the mark of a lover. To be thrilled at the opportunity to provide useful service, aroused by a pleased nod, and satisfied by the proverbial job well done is the mark of a slave.”
The Marketplace, Chapter 7, by Laura Antoniou writing as Sara Adamson

Well, that’s not very sensual or erotic, is it?  But it is a good definition of the term “slave“, and one that is used in our lifestyle quite often to describe a voluntary submission of one’s will completely to another.  In truth, very few “slaves” would apply this definition to themselves, if they are honest with themselves about what they require to be fulfilled in the role.  Most of us (at least part of the time), want the thrill of leather, the arousal and satisfaction provided by the role, and would be less than satisfied with simply service.  So, we modify the definition a bit.

Another common distinction between “slave” and “submissive” is that a slave submits only once, and that given her submission to her Master, she no longer negotiates anything with him.  A “sub”, by contrast, negotiates each scene, or changes in the limits of the relationship as time goes on.

A popular debate takes place over the difference between a submissive and a bottom (meaning the noun).  I think this one is solved fairly easily.  A submissive is a bottom who submits to the will of the Dominant in a scene, within the pre-negotiated limits they agree upon.  She does not direct the scene in any way and it is his choice which of those negotiated items he will incorporate into any particular scene.  By contrast, a bottom often negotiates precisely what will happen in a particular scene, down to how many strokes with a particular toy.  She does not submit her will to that of the Dominant or Top, and there is no exchange of power… simply a planned scene.  The verb form, to “bottom” can apply to either a bottom or a submissive, describing the activity of being the recipient of the Dominant’s actions.

I often tell those I mentor that you can picture it on a scale of 1 to 5.. with the submissive being 1 (“whatever pleases you, Sir”) and the bottom being 5 (“This is the way we are going to do the scene”).  We fall all along the scale, rather than at one end or the other.  This is what makes labeling impossible.  There is no right or wrong way to bottom… everyone should find the place that gives them the most satisfaction.

A similar scale exists for “Dominants” and “Tops”. The Top in a scene is the person giving the sensation or pain.  Picture the scale with the “Service Top” at 1 (“My pleasure comes from giving the bottom exactly what she wants to be completely satisfied”) and the Dominant at 5 (“Now that we have negotiated what is allowable, I will choose what pleases me”).  Again, we fall all along the scale… there is no right or wrong way to top someone.  I believe that most 5’s on the scale are hard-core sadists who derive their primary pleasure from the infliction of pain, and playing with one of these sadists can be a heady experience… they *enjoy* it so much!

Now we come to the most difficult: Master and Dominant.  Obviously all Masters are Dominants, but certainly all Doms are not Masters!  At least not in the generally accepted use of the term, which is someone who owns a slave and controls her life completely.  In some communities, the term “Master” is reserved for highly qualified Dominants who have proven themselves to be of excellent character and skill.  The community itself reserves the right to bestow this title and does so sparingly.  For others, it is simply a condition of the mind… the thought processes that a Dominant entertains as he tops… and some believe that the “Master” truly feels the ownership and responsibility of the slave under his control in ways the Dominant does not.  I tend to believe in “slave” wiring and “Master” wiring myself, and don’t consider them better, just very different.

The most important point I hope to make with all this is that we should avoid using labels to rate someone’s skill or dedication to our lifestyle.  Labels are beneficial in helping others understand us… but statements like “oh.. she’s just a bottom” or “he’s only a Service Top” do an injustice to us all.  Whether someone likes a lot of pain or none at all; total surrender or neatly negotiated play; absolute control or a part time play experience… we all have a right to pursue our fantasies and desires, and deserve better than to be labeled by the very people who should understand the most clearly how diversified we all are.

Let’s be kind to each other… we deserve it!

Vile

Arianna’s Safe Word

Posted in abuse, Arianna, bdsm, blindfold, Body Tape, Bondage, Duct Tape, Flogger, masochist, Master, Safe Call, Safe Word, Scared, session, slave, Spanking, submissive on April 17, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Back in the day I was a full blown Sadist. My first Slave was a total Masochist, with no limits.  As I look back on our relationship there were things I did that I am not proud of today. I did things that I would not attempt or ask of another today. Over the years I have moved away from being a Sadist to more of an M’s relationship without the pain.

Cherri being my first and it was like a game with no rules, although she did guide and instruct me on how and where to hit. I learned much of what I know today from Cherri. I have said all of this before. I was with Cherri for almost seven years, and I never fucked her. I did not want that close feeling, and there was just something about her that did not sit with me right.  Now she did suck a lot of dick, that was a daily thing, as well as Rimming. As far as sex nah I was just not into her like that.

I did allow others to use her. I had two close friends a male who for what ever reason had no luck in picking up women, and an older Domme who had a clit the size of Dallas.

At one time I was feared, a lot of subs and slaves were scared of me. I remember one night I was at a Chinese restaurant with a date, and a friend of mine showed up with a girl, as we were talking his girl said wait , did you use to live in that house on robins street. I said yes for about six years. She started shaking and told Jerry she wanted to go, she did not want to be around me. Then my date looked at me like what the fuck is she talking about.

Over the years I calmed down a lot, , but I did not know if I was capable of having a normal D’s or M’s relationship. I found it very difficult to break away from the pain game.

Then I learned that it had everything to do with feelings. Feelings for the other. Why would you want to hurt someone you cared about? Although I do know Sadist who are Married to Masochist, and they seem to be doing just fine. Another thing most Sadist are poly, having more than one partner.

Once again the poly thing I do not understand. I mean if you have the whole package at home, why look for another.

Now the Safe Word thing, this is a huge controversy, and most in the BDSM community strongly believe in using a Safe Word. Okay so in someways I do still consider myself a Sadist, maybe once a Sadist always a Sadist, it seems you never lose that title.

Those Dominants just entering the lifestyle should use a Safe Word and the Submissive or Slave should insist on a Safe Word. I believe if you are in a long term relationship you get to know your partner and their limits. You know what they can take and what they cannot take.

Well then I am told, you need a safe word so you can push their limits. Each time you session you want to push their limits more than the last time. I myself disagree with that method.

When in a long term relationship more so if you are living together, you form a mental bond, you know what ones limits are, and you care what their limits are, or you should. Pushing one to far I believe can be departmental to ones mental state, I do believe there is a breaking point, and that fear emerges . Once you bring that fear out, it never goes away, just like someone who beats a dog on a regular basis. The dog will cower when called.

I do get rough at times, sexually speaking, but as far as pain, not so much. I can tell when I am starting to spank to hard, and I stop.

The other day we were in a session and I wanted to tie Arianna up. I wanted to know she could not get loose no matter how much she tried. So first red body tape. Clear and about as wide as duct tape. First the wrist almost to the elbow. Then the feet, ankles to midway up the chin. Then my favorite the almighty duct tape. I never put duct tape directly on the skin because it can rip the skin coming off. Then the Blindfold, red body tape, then duct tape, she could see nothing. I have a bull whip that I un-braded, I unwrapped the handle cut the leather strips and made a flogger, I love it.

I am totally quite, just walking around looking down at Arianna, I reach over and lightly touch her and she jumps, she has no idea what I am about to do. Then I reach for my flogger and I start to run the leather up and down her body. Then I begin to strike her with the flogger.

Then I hit right above the clit, Arianna has my first initial cut out in the pubic hair above the clit which is awesome. I strike again then I hear two words. OH FUCK.

Yep Arianna;s safe word, she has had enough, so I stop immediately, no questions asked. OH FUCK that was her breaking point.

Now if I were to play with someone new, or someone I had never been in a  session  with I would insist on a safe word, because I do not know what their limits are. I have been told I am a Masochist, and I reply well you have not met a Sadist like me, so yes a safe word.

While in a session, the Dominant should be in full communication with his partner, so he can insure their safety. Even while in sub-space communication is more important then.

One day I may share some of the things I did with Cherri, I am just not ready yet. I will say if any of you has seen the movie Strange Land with Dee Snyder that would say a lot. Again nothing I am proud of and I would not enter another relationship like that again. I have had other Dominants ask me to session with their slave, just because of the Sadist in me, but I decline.

I like the place I am in. I am content, I am happy. I am me.

 

Vile

Bondage The Ultimate Aphrodisiac

Posted in Aphrodisiac, bdsm, Bondage, chain, Chained to the floor, control, Fantasy, Fear, Flogger, Master, Mind Fuck, Safe, Safe and Sane, session, sex, slave, sub-space, submissive on February 27, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Many of us in the lifestyle use Bondage as a form of play, just as we do spanking. Even those who are vanilla dabble in a little kink from time to time.

To me Bondage means so much more, Bondage puts one in a different frame of mind, a since of security, sub-space, and at times the mind is zoning, not really thinking of anything your mind is just blank.

Arianna enjoys Bondage, but to her it is more of a comfort zone, she feels safe, and secure, it puts her mind at peace. I remember not long ago I had her tied up and blindfolded, and it was not long until she just started rambling. What she was saying made no sense at all, a little giggly. She felt safe yet vulnerable, open and exposed.

Arianna loves to be restrained at night, this is done when I want. I do at times when she makes the request, but if I did it every time she made the request who would be in control. I have a very heavy chain that is attached to the bed, then up and around her neck. I do keep the key close at hand in case of an emergency. I also have cuffs that attach to the bed, when cuffed she is fully open.

I seldom have sex while I am tying up, this is her time. This is her release, and at times I tie her down and leave the room and she naps while restrained.

I myself have never been tied up, and I can assure you that will never happen, the thought of being tied up has never crossed my mind, I am not a switch, nor do I desire to be.

Although during bondage sub-space is seldom reached, but you the dominant can help the submissive reach that point once bound and blindfolded, just through peaceful conversation, reminding her of her place. The things you want to do to her. Slightly running your fingers across her body, not touching her breast or vagina.

Great care must be taking during play. Nothing at all around the neck, you would really be surprised at how easy it is to hurt someone. Although I do use a chain at night I leave it lose enough not to cause any choking . We Doms have a Dom-space we go to at times, so it is very important we stay in the right frame of mind. There are times I have to sit down and take a breather because I get so excited, and I need to clear my head.

At times I also use what I call a total mind-fuck bondage. Maybe six or eight months ago I was seeing Lyn the married Jehovah Witness , yea I know go figure. Anyway I had her tied down spread eagle. I was using my flogger on her, and every time I would make contact she would tighten up. We got to the point where it was getting to intense for her, and wanted to be untied.  I told her to move her legs and arms towards her, once she did the ropes almost fell off, and she was able to get lose. A total mind fuck.

Bondage can be beautiful, I am not to artistic , I do plan on learning some basic Japanese bondage such as the dragon sleeve, but I am not into the full drop dress stuff, way to time consuming to me.

 

Vile