Archive for the kinkster Category

MAsT Kissimmee

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, bdsm, BDSM Education, BDSM Relationships, BDSM TPE Relationships, Building a BDSM Relationshp, communication, kinkster, kinky, MAST, MAsT Kissimmee Florida, Masters And Slaves Together, munchs, slave, Structure, submisive, Submission, TPE, Vile Woods on FaceBook, viledesires62@aol.com on September 13, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I am not only proud but I am Honored that I have been giving the opportunity to start a New MAsT chapter here in Kissimmee Florida.

This has been a 6 month process but I can assure you it was one worth waiting for.

There are a few things I stand for in life and the lifestyle.

  1. Truth
  2. Honesty
  3. Education in a D’s and M’s relationship.
  4. I am against any type of abuse , be it physical , mental or verbal. This also includes the Dominant being emailed or text and no reply for days.
  5. We all know where I stand when it comes to people who cheat male or female.
  6. Communication can make or break a relationship Lifestyle or vanilla.
  7.  I do not know everything , everyday is a new learning experience , sometimes my mind may wonder off thinking about my past and some of the decisions I have made , and noticed mistakes I made, this makes it possible for me to correct so it does not happen again.
  8. Respecting your Baby girl your submissive your slave , your property.

 

MAsT Core Values

Core Values

Personal Fulfillment

MAsT believes that power exchange relationships can be a valid path to authenticity, self-actualization, and happiness.

Inclusivity

MAsT is open to all adults interested in consensual power exchange relationships.

Diversity

MAsT welcomes people of every sexual and gender identity, race and ethnicity, body type, socio-economic status, physical capability, and religion or spiritual practice (including those with no spiritual beliefs).

Free Association

MAsT’s respect for inclusivity and diversity does not preclude each MAsT chapter from assembling according to the desires of the chapter director, and from determining the criteria for membership or participation in that chapter.

Community Support

MAsT encourages the healthy development and support of power exchange relationships through the sharing of knowledge, experiences, perspectives and ideas among its members.

Mutuality

MAsT believes that the individuals who enter into a power exchange relationship do so as equals and that, as with other types of personal relationships, power exchange participants have an obligation to support the well-being of the relationship and that of those with whom they’ve engaged in such relationships.

Personal Responsibility

MAsT believes that every individual who engages in a power exchange relationship has a primary obligation to their own well-being and is therefore responsible for taking appropriate action if such relationship becomes detrimental to their sense of well-being or is otherwise no longer personally satisfying.

Boundaries

MAsT believes that the protocols created by those in a power exchange relationship apply only to the individuals engaged in that relationship. The individuals in the relationship do not have the right to impose their protocols onto others, and those who are not a part of that relationship have neither the right nor the obligation to participate in such protocols when interacting with the individuals in the relationship.

A  group of people coming together sharing and learning. How awesome is that? A place where everyone is welcome who is interested in a Total Power exchange relationship….

One thing I have noticed in the past five years or so , the community as a whole lacks Education. Most of the functions today is circled around kink. I know my slave and I are active in the local community , we meet for coffee , then dinner and it is over as fast as it started.

Although My next post or blog coming up is about a new Dungeon here in Orlando Florida called The Ninth Circle, a very well structured group..

Much Love

viledesires62@aol.com

Vile

 

BDSM The Problem Is The Lack Of Education

Posted in Arianna, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, BDSM Education, BDSM Munch, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, Collar, collaring ceremony, communication, Dominants, http://mast.net/history.php, kinkster, kinky, Living Poly, Living Triad, MAST, Master And Slave, Masters And Slaves Together, munchs, Open Minded, Protocols, slave, Stephan Pot, Submission, submissive on May 31, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I am always starving not for food well yes I am but Arianna has put me on a diet , well she did not put me on one I agreed to go on one. I am starving for information when it comes to the lifestyle , I watch , I listen , and I ask questions. I am a people watcher , I watch and I listen, I am observing how someone sits , how they use body parts when talking , or sitting and bouncing knees when talking , nothing gets by me. Just meeting you , you have about 15 seconds to make a friend. I have very few friends and I have my reasons, my number one is drama , and two most of the time when you have a friend they have a motive , what can you do for them? Fifteen seconds to make a friend and I know after the first 15 or 20 words out of your mouth is I am going to like you. I can count on one hand and tell you how many true friends I have , and these are friends who would drop what they are doing if I ever needed them or something.
Even on Fetlife most of my friends on my profile I have met I have 49 friends and I have met roughly 40 maybe a little more. Someone will send me a request who lives ahhh I don’t know Dallas Texas and I look at their friends list and they have 5.000 friends man please. I have added people who follow my blog, and most of us email each other, but if you have 500 friends how are you going to make time for me?

The era of the internet , it has exploded over the past ten years , you can find anything and it is right at your finger tips. Dating sites have exploded , craigslist WOW , and even BDSM sites.

Before the explosion The lifestyle was still around it was just not as easy to meet people, so you had to kinda feel people out , it was like dark and underground. More Taboo , or sick , kinda like incest.
People were sneaking around not wanting people finding out who or what they were into. The long Trench coats with hates to cover their face , it was really funny.

There were kinky parties , Private dungeons you had to be invited to. You would be met somewhere , interviewed then a decision was made to let you come or not and many times the answer was NO.
Safety was a much bigger issue , the older Dominants looked out for the subs and slaves. The older Dominant would school the younger Dominants, it was a very tight group group a small community.

San Fransisco wow Broadway st. I was at a titty bar one day and had been there since it opened around 10am around 7pm I walk out then sun had gone down , and it looked like the village people convention , of course it did not help when I called the police and reported my car stolen and it was parked across the street. After the sun goes down San Fran is a different city , and I suppose at the age of 20 it was intimidating , as much as I remember. I enjoyed visiting fishermans wharf and china town the food was awesome.

While stationed at Ft Ord I happened to stumble across a few kinky clubs , but people were paranoid , kinda like smoking pot and you keep looking out the window. Sitting in someones house thinking they are going to be raided at anytime. I found this to be very awkward because we were doing nothing , except talking.

Even today most who are in the lifestyle are scared and ashamed of who and what they are. BDSM has to be a secret no one can know. What will my fiends think of me ? What will my family think of me ? Co-workers today all someone has to do is google your name , and it is out there. I was in my yahoo mail a month ago or so and I was messing around with the settings or something , and I called Arianna in because I found pictures that were taking in the 90’s online and I had no idea they were there.

It is not like I care but if something happened to me the last thing I want is my family going through my stuff and finding , rope , leather hoods , leather restraint’s , vibrators , rope put away all nice and neat. and a large dog crate in my closet and we do not even own a dog. So okay my family knows , most of my friends know well okay all because I do not have any vanilla friends..

Okay so your a professional and you do not want your life all over the break room, well if you think no ones knows, then your some kind of stupid. Over the years at work Ive been called out or little remarks were made and for the most I just ignored as if nothing was said , unless it got to stupid for me then I would speak up.

All of the above falls back to a lack of education and for the most you cannot educate the vanilla world because there is way to much stupid going around. People are so judgmental, politically correct , wanting to point fingers, telling you how your abusing your partner. The truth is it is their life that is all fucked up , and you know it but you cannot say anything.

I am not saying you put a BDSM patch on your back and announce to the whole world your kinky , but why live in fear ? Why worry what someone else thinks about you ? Why worry if your family finds out ? These people you worry about are any of them making your car payment ? Your house payment ? Maybe they want to flip the bill for your next service on your car ?

Living a double life is way to much work and I would imagine it is pretty stressful as well. Maybe kinda like Batman , or Superman

The lack of education within the community , where Arianna and I live there is Zero gatherings that off any type of lifestyle education. We did attended a munch Thursday night , fuck what a long day we had. Wednesday night one of Ariannas friends wanted to go to Karaoke , so you know me I was game. The Retro Room is the name of the bar, its okay the service for the most sucks, but the drinks are good. So after talking with the DJ for a little the blonde Bartender comes over and she says Tequila sunrise ? Yup thank you. So about every 20 minutes she would just bring another , and another , and another , then I asked for a double, and another and another, and when my face was numb I stopped, I knew I had enough. I love hearing Arianna sing and one night I will record it and post the music.

Although I drink some when we go there it had been a long time since I had been sideways , or what some may call blind, but I was feeling good. The couple that came is new to the lifestyle and I am trying to be nice on Arianna’s behalf because she really likes the submissive, who is really not submissive she is only acting the part because of her partner. Okay enough of that.

Home late I am feeling right and up at 7.30 out the door and we head to the west coast to a park called Fort Desoto.
fort-de-soto

Arianna wanted to go sea shell hunting for her salt water tank , so her little crabs would have new homes. The water was incredible I was chest deep and could look down and see my feet and all the small fish swimming around. At one point two manatees swam as near as a hundred feet from me , that was awesome.

So off we go head home we took a half hour nap , and off to a munch we go , I am some kind of tired. The restaurant was a small upscale place , with finger foods and wine. What was really awesome about 25 people showed up so the place was packed. They were suppose to close between 6pm and 8pm but they also had a wine tasting going on at the same time.

The topic was suppose to be safe words, but with the layout of the place it was almost impossible and with people walking in and out made it impossible. It was brought up to the moderator that there was no need to have educational classes and a monthly get together would be just fine.

Okay no problem but now you can start to see a pattern now , this is all about change and in someways I do understand but for the most I do not.
I have been talking to the moderator for a couple of months about getting something going and she agreed until Thursday night..

Last week I contacted MAsT International and I requested a New Chapter Formation Petition. So now all I have to do is wait it out to see if I can get approved.

http://mast.net/history.php

MAsT International is an educational based group for all genders who believe in power exchange relationships. Groups are held for all to learn and participate. Monthly discussions on topics about the power exchange relationships. Which would include safety, relationships , structure and so on. Like many Munchs or gatherings there is no play parties it is strictly educational.

The Weekly and monthly group Arianna and I attend , we were hoping the moderator was going to put something together as far as something educational.
That would of meant I could of helped instead on taking on a new project. That is not going to happen so now I will take things into my own hands. The key is to schedule so there is no conflict with other dates in the local community here, which can be done with ease.
I also believe in this area a MAsT would do well because there are those who are truly interested in learning , and we also have a population of around 200.000. Where we live it is called four corners meaning four counties are connected , so I am not just servicing one county.

The Kink side of BDSM is just a treat but it is not the base of the relationship. The enjoyment comes from the power exchange as long as it is consensual.
Setting the foundation , moving into the needs for the two, then exploring the inner self as you both continue to grow. Taking each and every step so it allows you to define your relationship, a TPE relationship can be awesome. It is when you start to try and cut corners , this is where the problem come into play. Once your negotiations are set in stone you can then move forward.

Stephan Pot here on wordpress sent me a comment about a collaring ceremony he was invited to , and was stating how intense it was. Collars are earned not giving because you want to own someone. As with anything it means nothing or has no value if something is not earned.

The education process has changed so much in the last 10 years , I do know change happens , and at times change can be good , but what I am finding what you are finding , what we are finding people are getting hurt , relationships are short lived, and some even take their own lives. This stems from the lack of knowing , the lack of education and the lack of caring.

dirt

Vile

Fetlife = Drama

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Structure, communication, Dominant, Dominants Protocol, fetlife, Fetlife Groups, fucking and sucking, kinkster, Master And Slave, sex, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock on May 1, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

Everybody is wrong , but at the same time everybody is right, everyone has the answer, everyone knows what is best for you or how fucked up you are and you need to just call it quits and stay home and be a hermit.

The only people who know your wrong are those telling you how stupid you are, they all have to be right , right ? Or maybe just maybe they are the ones who are fucked up and your the smart one for asking questions ?

One question was and believe me no question is stupid but one question. How do you maintain your Head space between being a submissive and living in the Vanilla world.
What the fuck these people just started Bashing this girl to no end , Arianna pointed it out to me and I could not believe the remarks I was reading. It is no wonder not only people but those who are new to the lifestyle are scared to even ask what fucking time it is..

Why do some like to swallow ? why do some loving sucking cock? while there are those who refuse. Why do some love anal sex and can cum while being fucked in the ass while there are those who refuse to give up the ass ?
Why do some get off on pain while there are others who want no part of it? Why are some just into kink but not the lifestyle ? Why are some Baby Girls who want Daddy Doms , while others are submissive but only in the bedroom ? Why do some want to be 24/7 while others just want a fuck buddy ? Why do some want to live as a slave and give up total control ?

The list goes on and on and on and on , it is never ending and it will continue to grow. You know I do not understand why someone would want to be a pony but I think it is cool as fuck.

The thing is no one is wrong , you cant do that ? Well who in the fuck are you to tell me what I can and cannot do ? Which bill are you paying this month.
The funny thing is these loud mouth no it all’s are the ones who are single.

What I do not understand I try and learn , instead of putting people down I try to understand which is not always easy. One thing no one can change is we are all different , we all come from different walks of life and we all have different needs.
Sometimes it take some a little time to find their fit , where they belong.

I myself cannot believe the amount of disrespect a lot of subs and slaves show on Fetlife , it makes me wonder if their Dominant , Daddy or Master knows the things that are being said.
The Baby Girl , the Submissive , the Slave is a direct reflection of your owner. The way you act in public , in a chat room , or on a post reflects directly on your owner. It is also a direct reflection of your training if any training at all.

Most of the Doms or Masters who tell others they are wrong or they do not know what they are doing are in fact single. The Internet Kings trying to tell others how someone should be living.

We will never understand everyone , we will never understand others kinks and non kinks , but we can all try to understand and maybe learn from others.
I do try and keep an open mind , I enjoy reading how others live and what they have to share.

Social groups would be much more enjoyable and a lot less drama if people would jut try to understand.

gene

vile

When I Was A Daddy Dom

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, BDSM Collar, Change, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Divorce, Dominant, fuck hole, fuck meat, fucking, hoe, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, kinkster, kinky, Loyal, Manipulation, masochist, Master And Slave, Mentor, mistakes, Pain Slut, punish, Punishment, pussy, Rough Sex, Rules, sadist, SADOMASOCHISM, session, slave, slut, Structure, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used with tags , , , on July 13, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I actually met Bea online about 6 months before my life pretty much fell apart, we did not meet in person until about a month before I moved out.

I had already confessed to my then wife who I was and what my needs were. I also knew there was no turning back I had already reveled way to much information.
Then came the divorce, I had stayed at the house because of guilt, but the day the divorce was final, out the door I walked.
I let behind my 1976 Fiat Spider,my 1955 chevy that I had before we married, but the judge felt she needed it, and the 160.000 dollars we had in the bank account.
I left with a duffel bag and my Yamaha 750 Seca. It had about 77.000 miles on it, and I had about 1600 dollars on me.
Bea and I had met at an apartment I was going to rent. It was beach side in Daytona Beach. A nice 4 unit building, 2 upstairs and 2 down stairs. I opted for the top floor.
Two weeks later bea moved in as my submissive. It was some 6 months later I collared her. We had drove up to St Augustine for sunrise and I collared her by the old Spanish fort.

At that time I was going through some serious changes in life, I still had a huge guilty feeling concerning the Divorce. I had a young son as well, but instead of the 85.00 a week I was suppose to pay in child support, I paid 600 a month sometimes up to a 1000.00 dollars.

During this time I decided to drive a cab locally, who would of thought you could make a 1000.00 dollars a week driving a cab. I also drove a limo as well kinda like an on call thing.
Bea was working part time at a day care but wanted to be a teacher. So I set that as a goal. During our relationship I set many goals for her, because I wanted her to succeed in life, I also knew being her first daddy it would not last.
It is not to often the Baby Girl stays with their first Daddy and I knew that. I was 37 and Bea Had not been 18 very long, yea I was robbing the cradle. Her mom and dad came unglued. It was not very pretty at all, but they more less wanted her out of their hair anyway.

Bea was a cutter, she was a bad cutter, she could no longer wear short sleeves or shorts that were very short. There were times she would just cry for no reason.

I walked in the bedroom to let Bea know dinner was ready and when I walked in she was cutting herself. I just looked and said when your done , dinner is ready. That is all I said and nothing more.

Our relationship continued to grow, now Bea was about 5’2 a little chunky, she had the palest skin I had ever seen, Dark black eyes, and black hair that went to her ass, she was really beautiful.

As we continued to grow our communication also grew, and the more we communicated, the more she was able to release.

Now I was going through a lot of changes, prior to getting Married I was a full blow sadist, Sherri was my first slave. I had grown cold, no feelings and I cared about no one even Sherri. Cherri was just a target, nothing more. The whole time we were together for what ever reason I never fucked her, not one time. There was either something about her, or I did not want to become that emotionally close.
She loved being fisted, once my hand was in I would just pound that bitch, fucking her with my arm as hard as I could. I would have her tied down spread eagle on the bed, spanking her pussy with my hand, I would use a belt, and just spank and spank until it was so swollen, it almost looked deformed.

At first I got off on the humiliation, I got off on inflicting pain, I got off on seeing the pain in her eyes, but it soon became a burden, because each session I had to out do the last.

Before getting married I was jumping from one slut to another, but now I was fucking.
Yahoo profiles that was the shit. I could log on and have a date in an hour. I was upfront as well, you are just fuck meat and nothing more. Today or the next couple of days you are my whore.

So I was going through an adjustment, I met an older Dominant his name was Animel, yup that is his real name. He looked like a pissed off Santa Clause, I stayed by his side day in and day out. My mind could not take in enough information. To this day I consider him a mentor, we are not as close as we once were, but he is still here..

Six months into our relationship Bea has just gotten out of the bath, and walked into the living room , and kneel and said Master I want you to have this I do not need it any longer, and she handed me her razor. I took it from her and I said good girl, and I held her for what seemed like hours.

I had to teach her how to cook, she could not boil water, but that was really no task because I love to cook.
At night most of the time I would bath her, and wash her hair, once out we went to the bedroom and I would put lotion on her.

She followed rules and protocols without question. I do believe I was somewhat stricter then than I am now. Once she was home she had a collar and leash she would put on, the chain ran through the whole apartment.

This was about the time I was starting up my internet cigar Business, which was really doing very well. It was almost to the point I was not going to have to work any longer.

I remember one day we walked into a golf store I was seeing about putting cigars in his store, and Bea had stopped at the door and just stood there with her hands in front of her. The clerk asked me what she was doing and I said just what she is suppose to, we are talking, she has nothing to do with this. When I walked out, Bea was two steps behind me.

Bea wanted to lose weight, not that she really needed to, so everyday we would walk 3 miles, down A1A and back, in the evening just as the sun was setting.
It was almost our 5th year together and Bea enrolled in UCF She wanted to become a teacher, she had really come a long way, and I supported her in everything she wanted to do.
After all that is what Daddy’s do, we want our girls to grow, we encourage growth.

It was really amazon because going on 5.5 years and we had not yet had an argument.This was due to us being so open, and the communication we had, but I also had a tight leash on her as well.
I allowed her to have friends in and out of the lifestyle, and once a month she was allowed to have a girls night out..

I came home one evening and Her demeanor was different she was more girly , although she was wearing her collar and chain.
As I started dinner because I did 90% of the cooking she started talking about how her feelings had changed, how she had been talking to other girls about their daddy’s.
I was not sure where all of this was going, but after dinner I helped her with her homework, and once we were ready for bed. She went to the bathroom and came back in and she kneeled and ask for permission to enter the bed, she handed me a bottle , a baby bottle, and she asked me if I would feed her, I was stumped at first but I said sure.
This was the transition from Dominant and submissive to Daddy and baby girl.
If it had been anyone else I do not believe I would of went through such a transition.

To date she had only been punished twice, she walked a straight line, and was very proper inside and out. Friends who would come over always made a comment about how good of a host she was.

Something happened though, and I started to let my feelings get in the way. I no longer wanted to tell her what to do, or what to wear, or what to take out for dinner. I stopped enforcing rules, I let protocols slide.

Once I realized what had happened , I tried to regain control but it was way to late, we even had long conversations about what was going on, because we could feel both of us falling apart.
Once you lose control, there is no way to get it back. Because a different side of you has been seen, that is something a submissive or slave, and baby girl will not forget.

Then I got sick , I got bad sick , one morning I got up and I was in the bathroom choking and I coughed uo this black stuff which was dead blood. so I grabbed my blackberry and I dialed 911. That was the last thing I remember. Seven days later I woke and I was in ICU I had 6 bleeding ulcers, and by this time 3 blood transfusions.

Bea would come and visit me everyday , except for the last week I was in. I spent 31 days in the hospital. On the day I was released I called and all I got was voice mail.
I actually called an escort service because I had to have someone sign me out. I did not have my cell phone so I had no one to call. This hooker looking bitch came up and asked for me, and off I went.
A cab waiting down stairs, I paid the girl a 100 bucks and I fell in the front seat.
Once home the cab driver whom I knew had to help me up the stairs, because I was to weak to walk.
He unlocked the door and when it opened everything was gone. no couch, no TV, no dishes, no bed nothing.

I was not mad or upset, because I knew why she left the way she did, but she took the fucking bed.

It was some 6 months before I was back to normal. My landlord and his wife would bring food over daily.
They furnished the apartment for me. It was some three weeks before I was able to go back to work, and then I was only able to work 4 or 5 hrs a day.

My website had been shut down, well my merchant shut it down , during the month of December I had over 10.000 dollars in charge backs. Shrugs

Today life is good I am in a good place. We all learn from our mistakes. The only bad mistake is the mistake you repeat.

protocols

slaveleash1

Vile

Is Old Guard Real ?

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, Alt.com, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, BDSM Safety, Breaking Rules, Collar, Collarme.com, communication, control, controlling, Conversation, Discipline, Dominants, dress, Dress Protocol, Ego, etiquette, events, Gorean lifestyle, Gorean Master, Gorean Portocol, Honesty, Kink, kinkster, kinky, Leather Guard, Master, Masters, morals, munchs, Old Guard, Old Leather Guard, older Dominants, Open Minded, Private Protocol, Protocol, Protocol public, Rules, Safe, Safe and Sane, Self-Discipline, slave, submissive, TPE on July 24, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Many of the new today will argue that Old Guard is just a Myth, it never was and never will be. When in fact I do believe and have spoken to elders who were a part of Old Guard, in the late 60’s through the early 80’s

Old Guard refers to the leather community mainly the gay community. I myself am not into the leather scene, nor am I a part of any leather family since most have blown the protocol way out of text. In my eyes a lack of respect of what use to be.

Most of the Leather Family’s today are known as pansexual , you can google that. Unlike Old Guard, today’s Leather family’s welcome most anyone, without even really knowing anything about them. In the Old Guard days there were strict rules and Protocols to be followed. The Old Guard was a closed community and you had to become a member. Before membership was allowed one had to learn all rules and protocols and follow them, if not you got the boot.

Over the years we have strayed, we have lost the meaning of BDSM and it has falling more into just a kink, a past time, weekend warriors, bedroom only. Which is okay but the problem is everyone is right, no one is wrong. When someone hears how a slave or submissive lives they are just blown away and cannot believe they would allow someone to treat them a certain way.

It is not that a slave or submissive in today’s times are part of or believe in Old Guard, they just fall into their Dominants ways of doing things. Being strict, having rules, even protocols both public and private is perfectly okay, when there is no physical or mental abuse involved.

It is not that we take the lifestyle differently some are just more serious than others when it comes to the world of D’s and M’s. How Master Joe runs his house is on him, I do not and will not judge.

Back in the day a Dominant had to make his way through the ranks, there were steps that had to be taking. If a submissive or bottom had more experience than the Dom the sub out ranked the Dom, yea sounds weird. The problem is today’s Dominants want to start out as president they are right and everyone else is wrong.

Unlike today back in the Old Leather Guard there were dress codes, and they were enforced. Arianna and I have attended some local groups and I cannot believe they way some of the sub/slaves come dressed, more so the way their master allows them out of the house. Arianna has pointed out how mouthy some are, how she cannot believe how some disrespect their Doms.

Today it would be almost impossible to put together an exclusive group for meetings or teachings because of how BDSM  has branched out. Most groups come and go because of a dictatorship or just huge egos. Most people today are close minded when it comes to how others live as well

Old Guard when in a social setting it was the Dominant with the most experience who led the conversation, on the other side if the bottom had more experience they led the conversation, if equal the Dom was giving the go ahead.

When walking the submissive walked one or two steps behind, remember you are not equal in a sense. A Dominant would never think of hugging or shaking the hand of a submissive, nor would the submissive make direct eye contact, though the Dominant would. A Dominant would never think of touching another who was owned and collard, there was a respect thing.

Protocols is a lost art today, but what I expect if out in public a Dominant or Submissive should not assume anything. A Dominant should not just walk up to a submissive and strike up a conversation, they same with a submissive. It is however proper and okay to ask. Some couples have no protocols at all, nor do they wish to, this is where the lack of respect comes into play when it comes to what others believe. I have had people say they could never live like Arianna nor would they want to. What we have as a Master and Slave is very unique and special.

Old Guard when a Dominant was being served there were two ways, one palm out and flat drink on palm, the other the sub would kneel head down and arms extended making the offering. Depending on the protocol the sub could either leave or had to ask permission.

Those who play on the internet who belong to sites such as Collarme.com Alt.com BDSM.com and so on generally stay on those sites with very little real in person interaction, those who get lucky enough to find a submissive or Slave generally fuck it up because they have no real clue what a in person interaction is. It does not take long for the Submissive to realize they have been played. The so called Dominant will generally put the blame of the submissive when it comes to the relationship not working.

When I speak about myself at times I mention old school, and not old guard. Old School just means I hold certain values when it comes to the lifestyle, I give and expect respect. I set my life to a certain standard as I do with my Slave. I expect when out my slave is giving the up most respect and she will do the same in return.

So in closing I think we should all get back to the basics when it comes to the lifestyle. Yes we do need rules, yes we do need guidelines, yes we do need dress codes, yes we do need protocols. More so we do need to respect others.

Coming in at the top of those who truly live the lifestyle with the fullest respect are those of the Gorean lifestyle. If you should ever have the honor of meeting a Gorean Master or Slave you would be truly amazed. Old Leather Guard probably not since the lifestyle is based on a line of books, but the lifestyle is very strict and respected by many. I am not saying everyone should live the Gorean way, but if you study up on it, it will give you a way different out look and perspective of their lifestyle.

We should all come together as one, and set standards, keep the lifestyle proud, keep the fakers out. It could be done.

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Vile

BDSM VS KINK II

Posted in bdsm, Collar, Kink, kinkster, kinky, slave, submissive on May 15, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

On my last post I believe I looked over a few key points. While the Dominant is in full control of not only himself but his surroundings . The kinkster on the other hand is just that a Kinkster. The Kinkster is only interested in Kinky play. The Kinkster thinks being a Dominant is just about barking out orders and the female is suppose to just follow. The Kinkster will make unrealistic demands, and not understand why the submissive cannot or will not follow through. The Kinkster is quick to lose their temper, scream yell call names. The Kinkster can lose control while playing, not really caring if they hurt someone. It is easy to confuse ones self when it comes to the lifestyle.

The Kinkster who wants to Dominate and thinks he is a Dominant will make unrealistic demands of the submissive. Such as phone sex, make them stop in a parking lot to masturbate, demand videos, pics. Rules are based on sex and not for the good of the submissive. Most are very controlling, and demand things knowing the submissive cannot complete. They will punish for no reason, or change the rules midstream. If the submissive is not experienced it can cause much harm until they catch on to the game.

The Kinkster will make demands when meeting, yea short skirt no panties. Demand sex on the first meeting. Offer a Collar thirty minutes after meeting the submissive.

We all know about the Dominant. In full control, puts the submissive first. Does not make demands that cannot be met. Rules are based on structure , and for the good of the submissive. There is no yelling, screaming losing control. He does not change rules just so he can punish.

We all know this, I just wish more would be more careful when they are getting to know a new Dominant, so the two could be separated..

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Vile

Can You Just Turn Your Dominance Off

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, control, Dominance, Dominants, fetlife, Kink, kinkster, kinky, Master, slave, submissive on April 7, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

This is a question I have been asking myself for many years, and I do not understand those who are Dominant who say they can just turn it on and off.

I have a very good friend, I have known for sometime. He will tell you that although he lives with his slave, he is not 24/7 but he expects his slave to be.

He went on to say that he is to busy to be 24/7 and has no time, but is still yet searching for three more slaves to complete his stable, his flavor, spice things up.

So maybe for some there is a magic switch I have not yet found, maybe once you leave the house, you are now Mr, Goody.

My question would be since you are not 24/7 why would you expect the slave to still continue to follow the house rules? How could someone still expect the slave to feel like a slave? How can one be expected to follow the rules, if we are not in that frame of mind 24/7.

While I do not understand the switch, I can see one turning off the Dom switch, and going into the submissive mode. Nah I really do not get that either. I believe you are or your not. Your a slave or your not. I do know Arianna could not turn being a slave off.

I have never gave it a thought to submit to anyone at anytime , I am not wired like that, nor would I ever let some bitch tie me up and spank my ass. Not going to happen.

Being a Dominant takes a great deal of responsibility. So when you turn this switch off, does the responsibility go out the door as well.

Even while at work Arianna is in that frame of mind, even more once she is home. The master and Slave does not turn off at a certain time. If for some reason I said well you know honey I just do not feel like being Master today, so your off you can do what you want, have a good day. I am sure I would just get a blank stare. Do I get tired? sure I do, I get plenty of down time once Arianna is off to bed. Viles time. Arianna has been working on a quilt a lot here lately so this is her down time. I am not sure what a square is but she has about six of them done so far. She cuts everything by hand. She buys these quarter goobers from Joanns ,and yes I do go shopping with her, be it for food, clothes, or just to window shop, I am there by her side.

Arianna’s mother does know about our lifestyle, I am lucky in a sense I suppose. I have tried to explain things to her mother but I just get a blank stare. So when her mother sends me a text, I say she cant come to the phone right now she is tied up at the moment, it takes sometime to get a reply.

If you are into the lifestyle just for the kink, I could see a switch being turned on and off. I suppose it works the same way for a couple who are only D’s in the bedroom, but I would think at some point there would still have to be some D’s once out and about.

I would think if living an M’s relationship and the Dom just turned the switch off, it would lead to mass confusion. More so if a slave is being Micromanaged. Where would that leave her?

The lifestyle is changing daily, more and more groups on Fetlife are called Kinksters. There are some Master and Slave groups, servitude groups, but for the most it is just kink.

I think the control is to much of a need for me to just turn something off. I also would not know what to think if I told Arianna to go to the bedroom I want to fuck, and she said eh I am not a slave right now ask me later. WOW…

Either you are or your not.

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Vile