Archive for the Micromanagement Category

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, A Slave Is High Maintenance, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Rules, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Collar, Collared Slave, commitment, communication, compatibility, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, Dominant, emotional, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Inservice Slave, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Mental BDSM, Micromanagement, positive reinforcement, Private Protocol, Protocol public, Protocols, Punishment, Slave, Slave Owned Property, Submission, submissive, TPE, Training Arianna, Vile Woods on FaceBook, viledesires62@aol.com on February 22, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

I never pressured Arianna to call me Sir or Master , I waited because such an honor is clearly earned.

I loved the steps I took in building a relationship, I loved watching the relationship grow, but I also knew in order for it to be successful I had to be who and what I was.

I wanted Arianna to ask , and I waited for that question. Will you be my Master, I knew then I was on the right path.

Although we spoke of training and what our goals were , yes hers and mine , I did not go into any great detail and only answering questions when they were asked.

By earning ones respect you get so much more than trying to demand submission. You can demand submission but your not getting the whole picture nor are you entering a true relationship with any meaning.

A slave is not weak a slave is strong in mind body and soul, however a Slave does have different needs and goals, along with a different type of structure.

I had a strict 90 day plan in hand and I began training without a word. The one thing that made me stop and think was there was absolutely no resistance this was something I had never experienced. Today our relationship requires only daily maintenance , as with any other relationships just on a different level.

There are many definitions today when we try to define a D’s or M’s relationship we are all different and we have different needs.

Although Arianna may be my wife, best friend and partner she is property first, she wears a collar 24/7 that shows my ownership, I can proudly say it has been over 3 years she she has been collard and it has not been off one time. She wears her collar proudly and yes this includes work. Before entering a relationship that was a strict requirement of mine.

Many today do not take the collar serious , it is worn during play , when out to local functions, or when company comes over that is the only time it has any real meaning. If that is your lifestyle that is fine it fits you…

Although we train and we train to fit our needs  , we also have to take the slave into consideration. We need to set goals, we need to insure our property fully understands what is about to happen. We need to insure their needs are met on all levels, many would like to think it is a one way street but that is so far from the truth.

I myself take the collar very serious , it is a sign of ownership, it is a sign of devotion, it is a sign of submission, again do not take this wrong this is only my opinion.

Master/slave

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Respecting ones limits be it physically or mentally , knowing the limitations , knowing just how far you can go and still remain in control. Fixing problems before they become problems.

The feeling of security , the feeling of being wanted , the feeling of being needed, but most of all the feeling of being able to trust and respect.

In the beginning when the relationship is defined , what is expected , the rules and protocols, once everything is in place we as Masters cannot change things up a year later, many times going back on your word can be a deal breaker. There are times when something may need to be changed but I feel it needs to be explained in detail how it would benefit the home.

Training is changing the thought process , training is changing habit and replacing them. If you sit and think if done right you can create the perfect partner, that is the easy part , the hard part comes with maintaining it.

The training would include verbal , physical , mental, emotional , and at times rituals this is where structure comes into place. In my Master , slave or Owner , Property structure plays a huge part as with rituals , rituals become rules, protocols become rules.

Although I do feel punishment is needed that is not my main focus, I do not sit around and wait on Arianna to break a rule, she knows when she breaks a rule, which I can say has only happened once in 3.5 years. Positive reinforcement and communication plays a huge roll in any relationship.

Breaking someone to the point of feeling worthless , constant humiliation , abuse mental and physical , remember if you break it you have to fix it. I am more than sure the end result is not something you would want in a lifetime partner.

Training comes in a few different areas , be it service , sexual,  how to speak in public what to wear , how to talk , how to communicate with people or who not to communicate, who to hug or who you shake hands with ,how much do you want to control? We live a Owner Property relationship , a consensual relationship , consensual being the key word. Make no mistake I run and control everything in my home.

Just make sure who ever you are considering make sure they have your best interest in mind..

 

 

 

Training Arianna

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Adapt, anal sex, Anger Issues, Arianna, ass fucking, bdsm, Cheating Dominant, cock sucking, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, Daddy Dom, Depressed, Depression, Discipline, Dominant, Ego, emotional, Emotions, Gorean Portocol, Jealous, Married Dominant, MAST, Master And Slave, Masters And Slaves Together, micromanage, Micromanagement, molding your slave, owning a slave, Patience, Protocol, Protocol public, Punishment, references, Rough Sex, Rules, slave, slave positions, Spanking, Speaking In Thirds, Structure, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Text, The World Of BDSM, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Power Exchange, TPE, Train your slave, Training Arianna, training your slave, Training your submissive, Training your wife, Vile Woods on FaceBook on June 6, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Training still continues today, after two years we still continue to add. What is more interesting is Arianna continues to think of ways to give up more control. Truth be known she would be happy if she could stay home 24/7 chained to the floor, or most of her day spent in a cage.

When you hear the words A no rights Slave if you want to know the definition you can look to Arianna to find out that answer. Some take the no rights thing to an extreme but we all have common sense or I would hope. You would never want to do anything that would cause your slave any harm, or push them to the point of breaking. That is why I have stated over and over it is very important to know your submissive or slave inside and out.

What do I mean when I say no rights. First Arianna has no say so at all, before you jump the gun this was something she needed and wanted. This is why at times it is hard for a submissive or slave to find the right Dominant. If he is in it just for the game he will want no responsibility , meaning he is just after the pussy. The minute you show you are the slightest bit needy you will see a fast change in the Doms attitude.

When you speak of living D’s compared to living an M;s relationship there is a huge difference. A submissive has the right to say no, a submissive submits on their terms. While it is true a slave could really do the same if it really came down to it, but for the most that is not the frame of mind a slave wants or needs.

While there are many different resources and books on the market today, if you are a new Dominant or your interested in exploring the lifestyle then I recommend, http://bestslavetraining.com/ There is just a huge amount of information that is provided, it is almost endless.

The new Dominant who is just entering the lifestyle or the young Dominant I truly recommend this site. Also to those who are submissive it is good reading and it will show and teach you about how a D’s Or M’s relationship should truly be, again a lot of good info.

So you take a Slave and you mold them into someone you need. I myself had a very clear picture of how I saw my life living as a Master , and fully owning a Slave. In reality in today’s times you cannot legally own someone, but to be able to achieve that frame of mind is truly an unreal feeling.

You take someone and mold them into someone who fits exactly what your looking for when it comes to an M’s relationship. This is why once I started my search it took well over a year, as a matter of fact I was at the point of saying fuck it I am done, because there is no one out there who truly wants to live as a Slave. I was at the point of packing everything up and I was going to move overseas, I already had a job in place, and a place to live.

Then I met Arianna , I could tell just by talking to her she was different, the way she sat, talked , the way she communicated, the way she carried herself, the way she expressed herself and explaining why she needed to be a slave. I asked several times a Slave are you sure a Slave and not a submissive.

Then as she began to go into details about how she saw herself living as a Slave, I myself began to have doubts about taking on so much responsibility. Now it was I who had to decide if I wanted to take that step. You know I never really gave it much thought until Arianna shared how she wanted and needed to be treated. Rules , Structure , the giving up total freedom.

So I had a very short time to think about if I wanted to take such a deep step, I also have a very short time to put a plan together so it was very important to spend as much time with Arianna as I could , so I could really get to know her inside and out.

Arianna had been going through some very bad times before I met her , she was like a kid turned lose in a toy store but on an adult level, and she was very close to having a break down. She had been seeing a Doctor who had been prescribing the wrong medication for years, and every time Arianna went for a visit it was always her fault. So shortly after we met Arianna did in fact have a break down. So it was I who found a Doctor, and the doctor put her back on the right track. In the meantime I had come across Journals that Arianna had written, hundreds of them, note books dating back some 15 years, full from front to back. I spent a day and three pots of coffee just reading. I could not believe how one person could possibly endure so much hurt and pain. So we talked about the journals and I explained it was a need to get rid of the past, so we sat down and went through the journals and one by one putting each one in the trash. There were a few I did allow her to keep, those with poems that she had written or ones she felt really close to. I had someones life right before my eyes. A true story of a life full of pain and confusion, and people who did not understand her.

I suppose there comes a point where people want to care about someone until you have to put a little effort back into the relationship, once it becomes a little work to make the relationship work it is no longer adventitious so you slowly begin to start being pushed out, or everything is just blamed on you.

You can do it, there is nothing wrong with you. I do not understand how or why you feel like you do, I just want you to fix it.

Now my challenge had grown ever bigger because I had to change my whole plan, I had to sit down and think and think fast. I knew she wanted to be trained but I also had to consider her health factor, on the mental side of it. Her past relationships with Dominants had been abusive, verbally and physically and neither one of them had a clue who Arianna really was. Neither one really knew Arianna as a person , neither one knew her thoughts or needs nor did they really care. At the same time I had to stand firm, I had to implement rules, put structure into place.

Shortly after her break down I was called in to meet with her doctor, and after explaining our relationship she even said Arianna was in a good place, and the structure I provided was good for her..

You can only be trained if you actually live the D’s or M’s lifestyle 24/7. If you do not live together there is noway to even implement a plan. The Dominant is not there to enforce the structure, rules or protocols. Some may disagree and if you do I would like to see your plan because I am going to lay my plan out here.

If you do not live together you really do not have any control, you as the Dominant may think you have control but you are not there. Being in control via text, chat, on the phone, Skype does not compare to being able to wrap your hands around her throat and looking straight into her eyes, and speaking, then you are and have control.

If you are only seeing your Dominant once or maybe twice a month you are not living the true D’s more so if your just meeting up in a motel room, you are only experiencing the kink side of it, your there for a couple of hours maybe the night, the Dom leaves happy and you leave full of cum until the next meeting.

Training your Slave I am going to leave the submissive out of this picture for now because the Submissive has the right to say no. The Submissive puts limits on their submission. Just as the Bottom the bottom for the most only submits during play and will tell you before hand what is going to happen.

I believe many who are new to the lifestyle and who are submissive are being told they are a slave when in fact they are only submissive. Many men who claim to be the Fifty Shades of Grey for what ever reason prefer the word slave, or they try and plant a seed in your mind to make you think. You already have a pretty clear picture of what your limits are and you should stand by them.

This is why I did not want a D’s relationship, I had tried a D’s relationship several times and it just did not pan out. Once I started my search it was well over a year before I stumbled across Arianna, and it was like she just fell from the sky right onto my Lap

When training your slave you are taking bad habits and changing them with new habits. You are implementing new habits into ones life. The thing that really got into my mind was Arianna really had no habits, there was nothing she did on a regular basis that you would actually call a habit.

The same with rules and structure you are implementing new habits. I will say this none of Arianna’s rules are sexual. Rules are meant to improve ones life, to help guide, provide structure. safety , and make one feel secure. Ive read many post and blogs where rules are posted and they are sexually based. I really find this to be really disturbing , because the Dom or Daddy is really doing nothing to improve.

If you do not get to know your Submissive or Slave inside, out and you start implementing things and you do not know them on a emotional playing field you could really fuck someone up. If you have a submissive who suffers from any type of depression and you don’t know the medications they are taking, again you can really fuck someone up. If you do not ask these questions in depth during your first meeting , then it is apparent you really do not give a fuck, your only thinking of yourself.

You take someones life and you turn it completely around, you take a human and turn them inside out, you change everything about them right down to their personality, in some cases even the way they think.

I started training Arianna the day she moved in. I did not say okay your training has started, or this is what we are going to do. The training is something that we had been talking about but I really did not go into any great details.

I have talked about this before but I did not really go into any great detail. One huge mistake that most Dominants make or Daddy’s once in a relationship they tend to isolate the submissive, they cut them off from all friends and sometimes family. My train of thought is this is a huge mistake, because you still have to allow them some freedom, because there is a breaking point. The Submissive or Slave does need a break, a day off , time to visit friends, a girls night out, a day with the family. Doms who do not allow this have a very low self esteem, they are very insecure, jealous, they have trust issues, and probably ego driving, these are the abusers be it verbal or physical. Your relationship is a power struggle between the two of you, your resisting on all levels but you do not know why you cannot fully submit.

The first week we lived together we were like your every day normal Vanilla couple, we talked laughed, joked. The 8th day I restricted certain areas of the house. I walked Arianna around the house showing her where she was allowed to sit, and the furniture was not anyplace she was allowed. This was practiced on a daily basis. She now had to have permission to enter the bed. She now had to have permission to shower, to go to the bathroom. She now had to have permission to play on her phone, watch TV . When we ate dinner she sat on the floor next to me, and at times I would feed her. While in the house there were only two places she was allowed to sit. On the floor next to the sofa, or on the floor next to me at the dinner table. In the morning time I would allow her to sit at the table while we had our morning coffee.

Over a period of ninety days I implemented 20 rues, all of which were meant for self improvement. Again none of the rules were sexual. To gain more control, I implemented the speaking in thirds, may this slave, can this slave, this slave would like. Speaking in thirds is an awesome training tool, but I use only for a short time, or at times I will use as a form of punishment

I changed Arianna demeanor meaning the way she walked, the way she spoke to people. I implemented protocols for private and public. I trained her for in house service for when company was over.

One of the first things I did when Arianna and I first met I introduced her to others who were in the lifestyle, people I had known for 20 plus years. This I believe gave me greater credibility in her eyes, because she knew then I was who I said I was. We went out to eat with other couples in the lifestyle, we were invited to friends of mine for dinner , people just had to meet Arianna, and everyone welcomed her with open arms.

The came the service test I invited a Master and Slave over. Arianna and I cooked a rockin dinner, and Arianna served, and before we ate she either stood behind me or knelt beside me while we talked. That night she was the perfect host.

During this time sex was kept minimal and only on my terms. I said spread I used her and I got off, most of the time without even speaking, until she asked permission to exit the bed.

Arianna now needed permission to shower , she now needed permission to go to the bathroom. There were no exceptions. I now controlled what Arianna ate while at work, and how much she was able to spend.

Arianna now had to keep a daily journal one in the car so she could write down the time and mileage, when she left the house to go to work, when she arrived to work, when she left from work. If she needed to stop by the store if we had not discussed prior she needed permission. Once home she had another journal. This was so she could write down the time she started task, and the finish times.

I then implemented a few of the Gorean slave positions I did not use daily but when I did they were used mainly for humiliation to sort of remind her who and what she was.

Sex I love to fuck, I cannot remember the last time I made love. I do not even think it is possible for me any more, I love to fuck. There are three holes and I use which ever I want without asking.

You know years ago I never would of thought you could actually teach someone the way you wanted your cock sucked, or the way you wanted them to spread while your fucking, or if you told someone to lube your cock and they immediately got on their hands and knees and reached around spreading their ass open with out having to tell them, or to snap your finger and that was the notification to suck your cock.  There is nothing like the feeling knowing that your Slave lives to please you.

Okay so going on a little over two years now, wow time has flown by. Arianna has been punished one time and one time only. I usually do not spank as a form of punishment but this time it was needed. It reminded her of what she did, and now she thinks before acting, because she knows in our house there are two things you take note to, Choices and consequences.

To be able to train someone or be trained if you do not live together it is almost impossible, its like putting a screen door on a submarine and not expecting water to come in.

Now before you jump the gun and say wow vile your an asshole, or your mean and cruel, I am going to say 90% of the above was Arianna’s idea this is how she saw herself living as a slave, A slave not a submissive.

We were only able to achieve such a relationship with constant communication. Communication is the magic key, and if your submissive or slave does not feel they can talk to you about anything on any level, then you will never have their total submission, and your relationship will crash and fucking burn.

If you are seeing a married Dominant who is cheating on his wife, you will never be able to explore your submission to the depths you need, you will never be allowed to be who you are, most of all you will never be fully free.

One thing that just blows my mind and maybe someone can answer this question. If your seeing a Married so called Dom or Daddy, what do you think about while your sucking his cock? Do you think about how his wife sucks his cock? Maybe you think about him fucking his wife? Maybe he fucked her in the ass and did not shower before coming to see you? Do any of these things go through your mind? Do you ever think he just fucked his wife and your cleaning his cock off? Worst if you think your the only one he’s banging if hes married, WOW . Just keep texting or trying to call see how long you have to wait, go on be miserable. Or if your texting stops abruptly for no reason. You know what the deal is, you really know but you ignore it. You will sit there and wait and wait and wait, now that is really pathetic no matter what page your on, that is truly pathetic, and you deserve everything you wish for. If you were willing to enter such a relationship, LISTEN TO ME, you get what you deserve.. Get upset with me I did not do anything I am just speaking the truth.

More to come here shortly.

Guys you can have the world, you can have the perfect relationship, you can have anything you want or need, it is at your finger tips. All you have to do is be real and stop playing games. If your married and your not happy this is for male and female get the fuck out, just fucking tell who ever your living with, Hey I am done, I am outta of here. Don’t bring your drama into their life fucking leave.

As I am nearing 250.000 visitors Sometime next week I want to share the different country’s that have visited. This is really awesome to know that people from all over the world are reading my blog….

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Vile

Our Search For A Third , Our Bubble Our World

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, Arianna, ass fucking, Baby Girl, bdsm, blow job, Bondage, cage, Change, Commit, commitment, communication, Consistency, consistent, control, Dominant, Emotions, FaceBook Vile Woods, Living Poly, Living Triad, MAST, Master, Master And Slave, Masters And Slaves Together, micromanage, Micromanagement, No Rights, Poly couple, poly slaves, Polyamory, Protocol, Rules, sex, Sister Slaves, slave, Submission, sucking cock, Task on April 26, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

First I want to say I have been cigarette free since January 1st, okay sort of, I am still using the ecig thing. Second I have to wait until October for the Walking Dead to come back on. I am addicted to that show. Now I have to wait almost seven months, and it is killing me.

 

Well it is almost 6am eastern time , I am up as I am every morning. I wake at 3.40 am with Arianna we sit in the dinning room and have our morning coffee and we talk. Then around 4.30am I walk her out to the car and see her off to work, then our morning drive talk. Sometimes we talk about nothing, then at times like this am we have a deep conversation, and the conversation did get pretty deep and personal, mainly about our life.

The one word that comes to mind is simplified , our life is very simple, but I have made it that way. I have made our life simple and drama free, not a worry in the world, why or how is that ? Vile has made it that way. We live in a very controlled environment. It is almost like walking into a clean room in a hospital, you dawn your little paper suit, your paper boots and your mask, then you enter Vile and Arianna’s bubble our own little world.

The world of a Slave, the surroundings of a Slave, the thoughts of a Slave. What I have done it taken someone and I have molded them , I had a perception of what I needed out of a Slave. I had a picture of my own little bubble, I had a clear picture of how I saw my life.

When I first met Arianna she was way out of control, her life was in total shambles, a life with no direction. This was not her fault not in any way. Once she found out who and what she was she needed guidance she needed a teacher, someone to step in that really cared about her well being. What she found was men who thought they were Dominants or who thought they were Masters who were controlling and lived their life with their cocks. One thing on their mind and one thing only PUSSY.

The sad part is many of you out there have been through the same thing and many still are but you feel you have no place to go, or you think okay I am here I just might as well stick it out, better to have someone than have no one.

Now this can be a little scary and some will think there is no way, but when I say train a Slave that is just what I mean. Having this ability does not come over night, nor does it always work. One you have to be true to yourself, two you have to have the need to own, three you have to be willing to step up to the plate, four you have to have someone who is in need and also willing. It is kinda like okay my way is not working you do what you need to do.

So I open my world, you can step into my bubble , I will share what is so precious to me. In my world you will find no problems, you will find no stress, you will find no drama. Welcome to Vile’s world.

I am very much in control of my life and I let very few people into my world. When I invite someone over which is very seldom, even then I do not allow them into my bubble, I unzip and I step out, once they are gone I step back in.

Arianna was talking about how much she has changed, and how she missed somethings, it was like she did not care about anything or anyone any more.

Then I began to explain, I talked about the local news the other day she said I want to change this it is so depressing. The thing is none of that effects us. The problems around the world does not effect us, the cost of food going up, the price of gas going up, the problems the people next door have, all of the killing going on around us the everyday problems around us, none of that effects us, because I do not allow it to. Mainly because of our own little bubble. I handle things before they become problems, many times I handle things without Arianna even knowing. She will bring something up and I will say its already done. There was a problem from her past that came up and it had a huge effect on her. All along I told her I had a plan and when the time came I would take care of it, and sure enough I did. It is not something that will happen over night there are steps we have to take, but I am doing the stepping, Arianna just has to follow. It was a huge load off of her shoulders, and once it is finished there will be a great relief.

The bottom line is I will not let anyone or anything disrupt our way of life, our bubble our world. I am in full control and I will continue to be in control. Sure even I have rules, I have rules that come with daily life. I may or may not like them but they are there, sometimes they have a meaning and sometimes they do not but they are there, I follow the process because I do not want to disrupt what I have.

So I met Arianna and we hit it off , but after we had met I had a lot of thinking to do because it was really the first someone had laid out to me what they fully needed. It was now me who had to decide if I wanted that much responsibility. If I wanted to take on such a task. The I had to stop and think wait a minute you are Vile, there is nothing you cannot do. The one thing I learned long ago is, you never tell someone you cannot do something even if you do not know how, you say yes I can then you learn how to do it.

Okay so Arianna needs this and this and this, Arianna needs to be micromanaged, she needs daily structure, she needs rules, she gets pleasure out of being used, so I just had to come up with a plan. I was about to venture a total new training process. I called several Doms who I consider friends not close friends but friends, and everyone gave me the same answer. DUDE FUCK THAT, THAT IS WAY TO MUCH WORK. I can tell you the first time I walked Arianna into a munch and I saw Jaws dropping open, I was thinking yea mother fucker eat your hearts out, this is my bitch. You can look and then go home and jack off thinking about her.

So I had a plan it was a plan I had to sit down and put on paper, and once I was done I knew I had to stick to it. Although she was a slave and she had needs it was her who had to adapt to my ways, she had to adapt to my way of living, my thoughts and needs, it was her who would crawl to me.

A month into the training, I remember eating Dinner,Arianna was chained to the kitchen table and I was feeding her, I knew then the Adapting process was well underway, or when I chained her to the couch. Then when she asked for permission to go to the bathroom, I knew I was on the right path.

So our search for a third, it has been on and it has been off. The need for another Slave was not something I brought up, it was Arianna who brought up the subject. This was after attending a few MasT meetings and then we had a Dom invite us to lunch because he wanted to drill us about our life and how it worked. We get that a lot people want a peak into our little world, people seem so amazed when we talk about the way we live. We are really no different I do not think. Either you are Master and Slave or your not.

I am very protective of Arianna , I keep a close eye on her, while at home and even while at work. While I am in control, while she is my slave, it is her who comes first. I make sure her needs are met before mine. Why? Because she gives so much, even when she does not see what she gives. She does not see how she has changed mainly because she lives her life daily, I keep everything in check. I keep the two of us in our own little world…

So in the past couple of months I have emailed, spoke with and text several slaves, and I have nixed all of them with the exception of one we have been in contact with now for about a month. We talk on the phone and Arianna and her are in consistent contact with each other during the day, and soon she will fly out to visit.

When her and I first started talking I explained to her that is was not me she had to win over it was Arianna. Her and Arianna had to become friends, because well on my end, I know everything would just fall into place.

There are things that have to be understood and after reading this she may very well change her mind, but I cannot bend from our way of life. It is the Slave who will have to adapt to our way of life, my rules, my protocols , then she may enter our world our bubble.

The third will not be micromanaged which is obvious , I have no room for that. She will not have to follow the same rules Arianna does, she will not have the same task Arianna does. She will have to understand Arianna’s way, the way she is treated, she will have to understand her rules, her protocols, and be willing to except them. Arianna does have a cage, it is Ariannas cage and only her cage. That is her special place, she goes there to let everything go, to relax, she feels safe from the outside world. The slave will have to adapt to our way of life, our surroundings. The slave will have to fulfill our needs. Although Arianna does not fit into that normal Alpha position the third will still have to be the beta. The slave is there for Arianna.The slave will serve the home, the slave will help with the upkeep of the home. The slave will become part of the family, and except the way things are ran.

My first thoughts when thinking of adding a third was someone who is docile, and introvert, someone who is quite. This slave is some of those things but I think will be able to adapt.

We had thought about a Baby Girl in the recent past but I decided against that  because it would disrupt our process, it would disrupt our way of living. I think Arianna might be willing to except someone with one child, we spoke a little about it the other day and she said something about needing a three bedroom, that was the end of the conversation.

The slave the third would have different rules as I have stated, different task, but most important be willing to except Ariannas way of life, and not make any judgements one way or the other. Arianna is in a very happy place right now, Arianna is in a very safe place right now.

I have not brought up the extra flavor yet. This is what most Doms or Master say their reason is for needing another Slave. You know I get everything I need from Arianna. The word no has never come out of her mouth. I get my cock sucked when ever I want, I fuck when I want, I get the ass when ever I want. Sometime I just pull out of her pussy and slide it right into her ass without a though. I can do pretty much anything I want . Arianna does really not have any limits, that in itself is not easy to find, with the only exception she is not into pain.

So while sex would come up , that is not our main reason for adding a third. The third has to bring something to the home, the third has to be able to add to the home and to help continue to build a solid foundation.

Another thing I have to keep in mind Arianna will pretty much go along with anything, so I have to be careful with some decisions I make, things I do, again it is her who will need to benefit from such a relationship.

With the right Slave a Third could be good.

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Vile

 

It Is Not Always The Dominant’s Fault

Posted in abuse, Acceptance, Adapt, anal sex, Arianna, bdsm, Consensual, consistent, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Dating, Dominant, Face Fucking, Fake Dominants, Lie, Master, Master & Slave, Master And Slave, Meeting your new Dom/Master, micromanage, Micromanagement, mistakes, morals, Patience, Protocol, references, relationships, Safe, Safe and Sane, sex, slave, Slave no rights, Submission, submissive, sucking cock on March 2, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

A year and a half I have been ragging on other Dominants because of abuse. The fake Dominants who lurk in the shadows waiting for the perfect prey to come along.

Even those who are Submissive or a Slave has said well this Dom is a fake that Dom is a fake, but that is not always the case. There are those few times the submissive has just read someone wrong.

When you first meet a Dom, or a Daddy, maybe a Master, they all have a series of questions they ask you. When a question is asked they want a straight forward answer. They want the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. When asked questions you give a direct answer, and sometimes it is good to add if you see the need, or you want the conversation to take a different avenue.

If your asked a question or he makes a statement and you agree, you have just started digging yourself a hole, and unless you do something to correct it, your hole will continue to get deeper, because this is your train of thought.

When you speak about limits stand firm on your hard limits. Do you like anal sex ? No I do not that is a hard limit. If you do not like Anal sex say so? Do you enjoy pain ? No Pain is a very hard limits.  If pain is truly a hard limit say so. Do not say something that may have a bad outcome if you choose to enter such a relationship.

This is Vile.

Why do you want to be a Slave. I am looking right in her eyes waiting for a reply. I also want full eye contact.

When did you first become interested in the lifestyle ? Wait for answer.

How many Doms or Masters have you been with and what happened ? May I contact them ? And I have contacted other Masters.

How do you see yourself in an M’s relationship on a daily basis ?

The Slave What are my rules ? Vile I do not know as of yet I do not know you well enough to give or enforce any rules..

Vile

Before we go any further let me explain who I am. I am looking for a slave with little to no limits. I am looking for a slave who wants to be completely owned.  Sex is when I want and need, you have three holes and I plan to use all of them is that understood ? If the answer is no to anyone of those the conversation is over because I Vile will not bend.

You will follow my rules once I know you well enough to start implementing them is that understood ? Again the answer must be yes, looking at me in the eyes.

You will follow my protocols to a T without question,  is that understood ? What are your protocols ? I then say I am simple I have three that will be followed 1 2 3 I may add more as I see fit.

Vile

I do not share, you must remain loyal at all times is that understood ? Again the answer must be yes.

Are you into pain ? The Slave no I am not, good because I am not either. If her answer would of been yes that would of ended the conversation. Why ? Because that was something I could no provide her.

Vile

What are your needs ? What is it you need to be a slave on a daily basis ?  Very important questions there, again you must give a straight answer. You should already have every answer in your head by the time you meet someone. You should have a fucking list a mile long.

Vile

I am going to go one more step. In my home there has to be a bitch, you would be my slave, I would owne you without question, you are to follow. You do not have the right to question me and the word no never comes out of your mouth, unless.

There is an unless and a exception to the rule. If the submissive or slave sees their owner is making a mistake and it will effect the house, then they have the right to question, and they have the right to know what is going to be done to fix the problem.

Vile

Have you understood everything ? Did I leave anything out ? Do I need to cover anything I said again?

It is very important for the Dominant to be very clear when he is explaining his need, his rules and protocols. It should be explained in such a manner that he leaves no rock un-turned.

Vile

Do you have any questions or comments, or something you would like to share?

Answer I need all of the above, but I need to be micromanaged . WHoa , she just through in a wrench into my thinking process, that was something I was not expecting, so now my brain has just hit Mach one.

Vile

Micromanaged as in ? I want you to completely run my life, including my daily task, what I eat, when I sleep, when I shower, what I wear, everything.

Vile

Well um hmmm let me think. This was something that caught me totally off guard.

See now the Slave has the upper hand, the slave is now in control of the conversation.

Vile

That is something I am going to have to think about. I did not give a reason, I did not have to.

Vile

So if I agree to your terms and you agree to mine, your thinking maybe we should try to move forward is that correct ?

If I had agreed to her terms right then and there I would of been stuck, or played the micromanage part until I felt like I had enough control so I could back off.

I had to think about that part for a day. That would be taking a very large step. Before I could commit I had to come up with a plan, I even tried consulting with or Dominants, and their answer was man fuck that shit.

I however felt we had enough in common that I just might be up for such a task.

Everybody is not going to have the same questions, or the same needs, but you get the idea.

If you give the Dom a false answer or your just saying yes to please, you are like the Titanic you will sink and you will sink fast, and there are no life boats.

Sex is not the main road in a relationship, but if someone answered no to anyone of mine, the conversation was over, done. In the past I had giving in and it did not last. Why ? Because I was not upfront and I lied.

Be prepared, ask questions, do not be afraid to say I will not or afraid to use the word no. If the Dominant gets up and walks out, then it was not meant to be.

That goes the same with the Submissive or Slave, you to should get up and walk out. Kick the dirt and move on

It is not always the Dominants fault.

If a Dominant tells you when you are meeting with him, and he says your not allowed to have any eye contact. Tell him to go fuck himself. He does not have that right. If you agree you are already submitting , at this point that is not where you want to be.

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Vile

I Could Of Fucked Her

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, Be who you are, being used, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, Dating, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, extreme, Face Fucking, Finger Fucking, Finger fucking pussy, fingering, fisting, fucking, Humiliation, kinky, masochist, Master, micromanage, Micromanagement, oral sex, Philippines, punish, Rules, sadist, SADOMASOCHISM, slave, submissive, sucking cock, Total Slavery, Trust, Vile on January 6, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

BDSM has changed as well, the people, the respect everything. More so the younger generation. I just googled BDSM clicked on images and nothing but pain and torture. People are visual,it does not matter what you read , who you talk to, its all about being visual.

I remember the first time I left Sherri’s house I was scared to death, she was black and blue from the neck down from and back. She got off while I was just terrified. After that day though something clicked, the more control I had, the more pain I could inflict the harder I got. During sessions I am talking sessions that lasted hours, there had been times I had actually came, and came hard, just off of impact play.Seven years and she did not cry one time, until the day came and I said goodbye.In that relationship Humiliation was a huge part of her kicks, at first mine but as time went by it was more like a job, I had to out do each session.That is the past, maybe at times we reflect on the past to much and it does not allow us to move forward.

We all have thoughts, and it is good to have memories , but that is what they are just memories, some were good some were bad.Over the years the Sadist part of me seemed to slip away, or maybe I just truly wanted more out of a relationship. I can tell you the vanilla mistake I made, was just that a mistake. What was the hardest was having to live two different lives. Although I remained loyal during that ever so shocking adventure, and it was so not me. Because there were times I just wanted to let loose, but I would of never disrespected her in that manner.

Going from using a Masochist to a vanilla marriage puts one in shock. What the fuck did I just do, and I knew it was a mistake. I knew from the first time I went to her house and it was trashed. I refused to live in a dirty home, it was not like filthy it was just cluttered papers piled everywhere just fucking cluttered.What else is odd is to be in a relationship for seven years and never fucking, that was while with sherri. Unless face fucking counts, that was almost daily. I think if we would of had sex that would of put me on a much different emotional playing field and I did not want to be that close. While she did have rules I seldom enforced them . I did not care because I was getting off. The Fisting part is what was incredible, she was my first.I remember the first time I laid her on the coffee table and told her to spread and my hand just slipped in, I closed my fist and I just started pounding her. I could open my hand and feel all around and I could make her stomach move.Today I enjoy fisting but it is not a need like it was then. Then it was a new experience , it was taboo to me, everything with her was taboo.

As I grew older the more control I needed, as I grew older the more in control I was. As I grew older I became aware of my surroundings. I started observing people more, and trying to figure them out. Wondering what their home life was about. Wondering if they harbored a deep secret like I did.When out I felt kinda like a freak show, because of being so different. While at the mall in the food court eating I would look at different women, and imagine different ways of tying them up, and using every hole. Or what it would be like to face fuck them, to humiliate them, to take them down as low as I could, get my nut and just walk away as if nothing had happened.

I was the guy who would walk up to the women other men were afraid to, being afraid I mean being rejected. I have always had standards , and I always set them high, because I refused to fuck someone I did not want to wake up next to. So I suppose when it came to fucking someone I never settled for less.

I remember one time I was at a convenience store visiting a friend, and this woman walked in, I was like fuck me , she was fucking hot, maybe 5.0ft even ,long dark brown hair, fakes tits. She was wanting to know if we knew anyone who sold pot, she said her husband was in their truck past out. As we were talking I told her I might know someone but I had to call in private so I walked in the stock room and she followed. I made a call , I hung up and I put my flip phone back in my pocket and I just looked at her. I walked closer to her  and she was backing up I did not say a word I just looked into her eyes. Once she was against the wall, I wrapped my hand around her throat and kissed her for what seemed like for ever. While kissing my other hand was down her shorts banging her pussy with my hand three fingers deep. After I finished kissing her , I pushed her down to her knees and I took my cock out and it slipped into her mouth and I just started fucking, it took all of a minute for me to blow my load. Once finished she got up and said in this little country accent, No man has ever treated my that way. I gave her the number to my friend and told her when her husband woke up show him what you like.To stop everything all she would of had to say is no or stop, and I would of apologized, but I could read her from the second she walked in. I didn’t want to fuck her I just wanted or needed that control.

Then the stuck up bitches , until 5 or 6 years ago I would work at a shell station during events to help out and make some extra cash Arianna has met the owner of the store before. Anyway This girl Sarah would come in every night and buy one beer Coors. Then a week went by and she did not come in. The following week Sarah came back in and I greeted her, then I said there is something different about you. I said ahhh you got a boob job, she made the comment I was not to worry I would never get the chance to touch them. So I closed my eyes and I started moaning, then I stopped. She said what the fuck are you doing. Well Sarah I have a very vivid imagination and I just fucked you and you were by far the worst piece of ass I had ever had, so I do not want to touch them. I never saw her again.That was how open I was, and yes those are true story’s.

Being a Dominant for any period of time it is so easy to spot the submissive women. I have point out a few to Arianna but she just laughs, little does she know.As I grew older I needed more. I needed more control but there were very few who could give up the control I needed. BDSM is much like a drug, the more you learn about it, the more you take part, the more you converse about it the more you need.There was never a shortage of pussy, it was finding women who did not use it as a tool , so they could get their way.

I wanted to have it my way.A year and a half before I met Arianna, I got up at 3.30 am, turned on the coffee pot waited, poured a cup went back to the bedroom, I was watching the morning news and I started thinking, Vile what the fuck are you doing. You are 48 years old and your waking up alone, that is fucked up. You come home to two dingy roommates . What kind of life is that?So while at work I began to put a list together, A list of what I wanted out of a relationship. The type of slave I wanted to have a life with. A slave who would want to follow. A slave who had no rights. A slave who would want to drop to their knees because it was a need, or spread because it was a need to please. A slave who wanted to communicate,

A slave who was smart, beautiful and intelligent. A list I was not going to give in, just so I could get some pussy.So I met Arianna, we talked for hours, even after I told her what I needed she did not flinch. I had pretty much figured out what she needed, but I was thinking what the fuck she has needs to, do I really want to do this. Just by talking to her and with out her giving out to much information. I had figured out she was being used, your whole life was out of control, she needed micromanagement, she needed someone to take her by the neck and say stop. Did I really want to invest that much time? I had to think about it for a day or so.Okay she is beautiful, her smile is one to kill for, she has a body built for sin, an ass to die for, each cheek just fits in the palm of my hand, small but firm breast, just fucking wow. The first time she got out of her car, blood rushed down to my cock so fast I got dizzy.There had to be more to the relationship than just sex, I needed so much more. I was in the process of moving to the Philippines , I had already made up my mind. I had a job lined up. I was going to start over.
I was going to start fresh, but something inside me clicked, just like the first click in my life. I was thinking maybe just maybe this will work, but I will have to put a long term plan together, a plan that I had to stick to, and I knew I had to remain consistent or I would loose.The first time she wrapped her lips around my cock I knew I had her, more so the first time I crawled between her legs, and I wrapped my hand around her throat, and I started to fuck her, I looked in her eyes and said I am going to own you. That statement proved to be correct, because I did everything in my power, my years of knowledge, and experience I had gained within the lifestyle, everything that I had learned, and for once I was putting it towards good use. I was finely using what I had learned over the years. I can tell you this believe it or not. If I want something bad enough, Vile always wins. If your just a passing thought that is what you are or were a passing thought. I never lose.

Image The key is to give back as much as you take, sometimes you as the Dominant has to give back much more. In the end though you can have anything you want, without question.

Vile

Why Dominants And Slaves Are Single

Posted in abuse, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Collars, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Dating, Dominants, Fake Dominants, fucking, In Search Of A Master, Master, micromanage, Micromanagement, needy, Rules, slave, Spanking, sub-space, submissive on December 8, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have been trying to mentor a local Dom for sometime now. Him and his baby girl split on bad terms but are still living together due to financial reason neither can afford to live on their own, which makes Bad Medicine if you follow me.

It goes both ways as far as being single not so much a submissive or Slave but more so men who claim to be Dominant and active in the local community it does not take long to get a bad name.

The problem is these men do not have a fucking clue. A Slave in the lifestyle is not someone who picks cotton, or builds pyramids, but this is the way they see it. You are no more than an object that is able to spread.

Master M is really a good guy, but he has no concept about what the lifestyle is about. His profile reads I have been a Daddy for 10 years but probably 10 months at best.

I met him at a local munch with his baby girl about 8 months ago, and shortly after I invited them over for dinner, after they left I told Arianna they would not be together another 3 months well I was wrong it was only a month.

So I tried to talk to both and it was like talking to a wall, she was fed up and he did not want to put any effort into the relationship. He would spend all his time while at home on the computer looking for another female to move in.

People have disagreed with me before about this statement but here goes. If a man tells you he is Dominant and he has been in the lifestyle for ten years , are you just going to take his word or do you dig deeper?

Since Arianna had been burned twice maybe more than twice I wanted to make her feel safe. I introduced her to my friends who were also in the lifestyle, these were people who had known me for ten years or longer.

It does not take you long to figure out you have stepped in a mess, but sometimes it takes you longer to figure out the Dom is controlling and not in control. All they want to do is fuck and punish. You never go out besides the first couple of dates , you never meet any of his friends, you are stuck at home waiting on his call or visit.

If a Dominant is single and has been for sometime there is a reason. Knowing what questions to ask is very important when your meeting someone for the first time. One being what is sud-space ? If he has to stop and think, yea then you know. Ask why he wants a submissive or slave ? If it is because he likes giving orders, of punishing, or just being in charge, you know you just on a one time date. I promise you they will give some goofy answer.

While at a local munch a couple of months ago we were eating and i was talking to Daddy M and I made the statement if a slave or submissive has been single for a long time it was because she is nutty, as I looked up there were about 16 eyes just looking at me.

Well that is not always the case, many are just selective , and that is a good thing, many take there time in their search as you should. Many are able to wait it out until the right one comes along. While those who are new are just running full steam ahead, and not even looking back.

Another reason is a slave could be to needy to most, a Dom not wanting to invest that much time. When I was explaining to Master R about my relationship being micromanaged, he said fuck that, it is way to much work. Being needy is not a bad thing, many Doms prefer a needy slave. I know I do , I am an attention hound.

Finding the right one is very important, again spreading your legs does not make you submissive, sucking cock does not make you submissive. Your actions, how you carry yourself, your personality , your wanting to serve, the list goes on and on.

The best thing you can do, is make a list and keep it with you. A list of how you see yourself in a relationship. A list of your needs, a list of what you expect from a Dom. A list of what you do not expect, such as anger, yelling, changing rules midway , maybe not being shared. I know many who pass their slave around like a bucket of pop corn. Show the Dom your list, he will either say yes or no. Do not be afraid to speak up. This is your life, this is your body, this is your mind. Ahh the number two top things, NO DRAMA and no problems with EX’S.

More important if a Dom wants to collar you on the first date, just look and shake your head, watch him blow up. when you say no.

You get the picture.

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Vile

I Have Molded The Perfect Slave

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, anticipation, Arianna, bdsm, Bond, Collar, control, Dating younger woman, Dominants, MAST, Masters And Slaves Together, Micromanagement, No Rights, Protocol, punish, relationships, Rules, serve, slave, Slave no rights, Structure, Submission, submissive, The perfect Slave on November 13, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

I cannot even begin to tell you how many Slaves I met during my search. Over a year and a half and it seemed endless. Yea I met a lot of nutty ones but there were probably some if not most who thought I was nutty with the type of TPE Total Power Exchange relationship I wanted. The words out some some mouths were Fuck That, or I could never give up that much control, or your crazy.

I was just about to give up as a matter of fact I was already making plans to move out of the country. I had a place to stay and a good job already lined up with sprint.

Then I signed into AOL one morning and I had an Email from who is now Arianna. . I thought what the fuck I will go ahead and reply it is probably nothing anyway. That day or the next nothing. The third day another email. Telling me she was not sure what she wanted, and she thought my age would play a factor. That was because she had been seeing an older Dom who lived out of state, and was well less mobile.

Her first email included a few pics, when I clicked open, my Jaw dropped to the floor, I said Lord have mercy fuck me with a chain jaw this is perhaps the finest female I have ever run across. I still had not sent a pic. I was trying to do self pics, I had the guy down the street takes some pics. I was thinking man this will never happen.

I knew then that what I wrote back had to be perfect, it really depended on what my reply was. I knew just one word out of place and it would be over. I knew I had to come across just right, not to cocky, and no ego. It took me a couple of hours sitting in front of the computer, drinking coffee and thinking word for word, ahh fuck I almost forgot the fucking pics, clicked on add file then pics when done. Then I set there for a minute and  I hit the send button. Now I just had to wait it out. That was around 11am I did not know she worked until 2.15 so the wait seemed like days.

The third email I just looked at it for a few minutes, I got up poured another cup of coffee. I sat back down and clicked open and I started reading. Now she wanted to meet me. I went Whew , now comes the test. I Vile not only had to walk the walk but I had to talk the talk, Hmm did that come out right ? You get my point.

When I saw her pull up and she got out of the car, blood rushed down to my dick so fast I got dizzy, I was just fucking numb, I almost got tongue tied, but I took in a deep breath , stood tall and introduced myself.  We had coffee and we just set and talked maybe a couple of hours, then she had to leave.

I walked her to her car and we said goodbye , she told me she would contact me soon. As she drove off, I was thinking man just fuck me running already. An hour had gone by and nothing then two hours and nothing. So i sent her a text thanking her for her time I had hoped it would have worked out, the next text was I want to come back over tomorrow. I knew at that point and time, it was game on, Vile had to go to work.

Now that I had told her everything I needed and she agreed without hesitation she then began to explain what she needed. She was looking for a Micromanagement type relationship. She was also looking for a No Rights relationship. That threw me a curve ball I was not expecting those words, so I had to think and think fast. Was that something I could manage. Was that the type of relationship I wanted. My brain was playing tennis back and forth , back and forth. Then I agreed yes I can do that, and it has worked, and worked out for the best.

Well just a few days short a year now, Living as Master and Slave, Husband and Wife, and she is collard. I can say Life Is Good.

I was at a loss of words when we were talking and I was telling her about me and what I expected, and her words were Okay. Okay I was pretty much speechless , I had to gather my thoughts , and I had to put a plan together.

I thought I would be met with much resistance but that was not the case, everything just fell into place. I had never met a Slave who was so docile, a slave who was so compliant , a slave who truly had the desire to please.

I encourage all new slaves to be active in the local community . I think this is very important in a new beginning, taking baby steps. I also believe if a new slaves meets a new Dominant she should insist on attending Munchs and local groups. This truly helps in the growth.  I would not think a Dominant would ever refuse to take a slave to a local function.  If the Dom refused I would question why. It is very important for slaves to interact with other slaves, again the allows growth.

I told Arianna the first 90 days would be the tell, tell I said the first 90 days could be the breaking point, but everything just really fell into place. I had never experienced anything like it before.

The first thing I wanted to do was introduce Arianna to people in the local community, to make friends but also to help validate me as a Dominant. A Dominant should not be afraid to introduce a slave to others.

When I get off work the first thing I see when I walk through the door is this.

Image Right there by the door. This is not something Arianna was instructed to do she has a need to do.

I suppose those who are true, I mean true in heart there will be no resistance. If the Dominant is in the right frame of mind there will be no resistance. If both are on the same page there will be no resistance.  Resistance can be a passing thought, everything will just fall into place.

When we are out attending local functions I hold my head up high. I walk proud, I am a proud Dominant, owner and husband. When I start to explain how our relationship works people just sit with their mouths open in disbelief. About a month ago while at a MAST meeting MASTERS AND SLAVES TOGETHER, I walked outside to grab a quick smoke , and a Mistress walked up to me and said that is some kind of a relationship you just explained, and I just nodded. Then last weekend at another MAST when Arianna made the comment that she felt indebted there was silence, and the Dom running the group said he had never heard that before.

I have said this many , many times if you the Dominant are true to your word, you stick to the truth, you are consistent. You are not just waiting for a rule to be broking, or a reason to punish. Everything will just fall into place, you will have the relationship that most only dream of having.

Submissive can be good, being a Dominant can be good, you put both together and nothing will break the bond.

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Vile