Archive for the Owned Slave Category

BDSM With No Emotion

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, anal sex, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, choices and consequences, codependency, commitment, communication, compatibility, CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENT, fifty shades of grey, https://ncsfreedom.org/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, https://www.facebook.com/vile62, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, NCSF, owned property, Owned Slave, sadist, SADOMASOCHISM, sane and consensual, sex slave, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Submission, TPE, Training Arianna, viledesires62@aol.com on July 12, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I love comments , I love what others have to say, I love hearing their point of view, I love it when others share feeling and their thoughts. How ever if you are just going to Bash me your comment will be deleted. I am far from a professional writer and most of my post are done in 10 or 15 time slots in the early am of the hours.
Enough about that , from time to time I will get a comment or a question from a younger Dominant who is up and coming , while it is true we all have to start somewhere , that starting point is the beginning of a new foundation in our life…..

The early steps we take will be our paths for many years and we do not get the opportunity to change it that often , and if we do it really takes a lot of work, mainly because you pretty much have to reconstruct your whole thought process. Wow that is pretty deep coming from me.

Maybe sometimes we get caught up in life and screwed over enough we lose our emotions, we lose feelings or the ability to have feelings towards someone in a relationship. Maybe trust comes into play , maybe your not capable of feeling any longer, maybe your not able to trust.

No emotions no feelings when entering a relationship is not fair to someone who attempting to build a lasting relationship. This is where communication comes in and sharing your point of view, maybe leaving no hope of building something or maybe there may be light at the end of the tunnel.

Arianna and I met a Master some time ago who was or is looking for a consensual , non consensual relationship. We met up for lunch one day and he literally drilled us for a couple of hours wanting to know about the foundation of our relationship and what we did to make it work.

One thing I found odd is he would not really share much of his thoughts on how he saw his relationship , mainly because I think it was really dark and maybe I am better off not knowing. I would not of judged or thought his way was wrong , maybe I would of even tried to understand.

There are so many different levels of submission , and the same for those who are Dominants or Masters, from mild and no control , to the most , unthinkable acts one could think of.

I know from experience being a sadist at one time , very few sadist are capable of developing any feelings or emotions. While I liked I did not want to feel , because if I felt I would not of wanted to inflict pain and at that time inflicting pain was a need.

To date I am living the dream, it may seem like I brag a lot but it is really not bragging. I want to show others in the lifestyle your relationship can be the same if not better.

A Question that came up on the topic of Sex and submission was …

Again I’m pretty new to the scene so sorry if this is rude, but I thought in TPE the decisions were up to the Dom. Why would a third need to win over Arianna, doesn’t she consider your word final?

This is an awesome question and and yes in my home I have the final say the final word case closed. Looking deeper though if you have never known or felt love just ask me how deep my love for Arianna is. My last thought and night and my first breath when my eyes open.
Arianna is my responsibility and she not only needs me to make the decisions she trust me enough to know I will. What ever I decide effects both of us, and the outcome of any decision I make could make or break.

Talks of a Triad is still on going , and we are still giving it great consideration but it would really have to be someone special. You have to be careful when you bring someone into your home, because what you have built could come tumbling down out of control and no way to fix it.
While I could just bring someone else in and say to Arianna this is our new slave take it or leave it. While Arianna is my slave she does have the right to leave at anytime. This falls under the consensual side of things, and our relationship is 100% consensual….

Question….

1. Does there have to be an emotional component to a Master / Slave relationship? I’m very turned on by the idea of owning a woman and using her sexually as I like. However, I don’t feel like I could love such a woman, and I’d prefer she not love me either. The few women I’ve loved in my life were pretty amazing as-is and needed no correction from me, I’d have gained no pleasure from disciplining them. The desire to train a slave and punish her for disobeying is a purely sexual one. Is that unheard of in the BDSM world? Are there subs who get off sexually on subbing without expecting a dom to take care of their emotional needs, and who don’t expect him to be all sweet and romantic?

So your thinking a consensual non-consensual relationship which would be made during the negotiation process. Both agree or the slave would agree you can do anything to me without question or without future negotiation. That truly takes a lot of trust.

The answer is yes there are those out there dominant and submissive who are seeking relationships where there would be no feelings involved at all, purely sexual.
Here is where the problem lays, most but not all who are submissive to have a codependency problem to a certain extent, some more than others, then you speak about a slave. A slave requires a great deal of care, not only physically but mentally . While it is possible to have the type of relationship your looking for, you would have to do it without any type of connection between the two of you, there would not be a bond, nor would the slave truly be able to trust, she could trust enough to play but not trust enough to fully let go.
Training takes a lot of time and dedication , if you do not live together training is nearly impossible because you really have no control. You as the Master have to set down and define who and what you are, you have to know what you need and what you need out of your slave. Being upfront about your intentions, being open about your thoughts…

3. I am really, really turned off by the idea that the sub is really in control of everything, and that this all secretly for her benefit. That the dom’s job is to orchestrate every sexual encounter to be totally mind-blowing for her like he’s choreographing a Broadway show. No thanks. I want a woman who genuinely wants to be my property, a toy I use how I want, when I want (within her limits, obviously). So many submissives claim that the pride they feel in pleasing their master is all the pleasure they need, but then go on to talk about lovely spankings and reassuring hands. Really? Is he your master or your slave? Does he rub your feet too? 😀
Meanwhile I read some of your slave’s blog and, wow. You have her trained so damn well. That post where you face-fucked her til she puked and then you made her clean it up was the hottest, rawest thing I’ve read in so long. You are the first dom I’ve encountered who trained a sex slave that actually does what men want. None of that dainty Fifty Shades stuff, riding crops and silk blindfolds. How did you do it? I mean was she always into throat-fucking and painal or did you push her there? If you did it, you should write a book, man; you will make a million dollars. If you didn’t, where did you find her?!?

You know you speak of your turned off by the idea that a submissive is in control , and in most cases this is true. The Dominant will want something but will cave in under pressure. So the Dominant is in fact in control until the submissive Barks and the dom backs down. So in this type of relationship who is really the Dominant?

What your seeking can be found it will just require a lot of time and patience on your part and sticking to what you need in a relationship. Many who live the lifestyle are not truly 24/7 even though they come off as being , some even say you cannot live 24/7 and that is a crock because I do.
I control everything from the time we get up until we go to bed. Many claim they do not want that kind of responsibility but it is really easy to put a plan into place.

Yes Fifty Shades was a let down I did take Arianna to see it but instead of BDSM it was a love story about a Dominant who suffered from childhood problems and depression. There was no structure , no rules or any reason to why he wanted to do the things he wanted to do….

So how did I do it you ask? Well as I said above I had to define who and what I was. I had to have a clear picture as to what type of relationship I wanted. I have had relationships in the past and for the most all were good and we parted on good terms, but I was still looking for that definition.

The rules , structure and protocols you had for you last slave will not work for someone new, mainly because people are different, needs are different and we grow , we grow on a daily basis.

Once you start your training you have to stick with it, once you explain how the relationship will work and what you expect you have to stick to it. Once you change or give in you have lost control.

While sitting here I started thinking Arianna and I have what you would call a consensual non-consensual relationship. Our relationship was negotiated before we agreed to actually enter a M’s relationship. As I stated before when entering a relationship I would bend when it came to my needs but in the end I was not in a fulfilling relationship. My needs were not being met and I was not able to be who I was.

Many in the BDSM world view consensual non -consent bad many see it as an open door to abuse , and the term is mainly geared towards owners of property.
I suppose there are those who take the term to the extreme , but if you truly care about your slave or property surely you would not bring and physical or mental harm to them.

The basis of consensual non-consent is: “I consent for You to do whatever You like to me without future negotiation”. There is just the first consent. Yes, I consent to whatever is going to happen, without needing to further negotiate what is going to happen. Obviously, strong trust is involved.

There are many reasons why consensual non-consent is a common way for BDSM partners to play. It is a strong reinforcement of the power exchange, and it supports mystery, spontaneity and excitement from the unknown. Many people argue that SSC (safe, sane and consensual) takes away the ultimate BDSM experiences in exchange for relatively safe exploration.

While you can have a relationship without caring , or not having any emotions , that would also bring no connection and a lack of trust on the slaves part , not that it cannot be done. If you were to find such a partner the relationship would be based off of just lust and we all know those are short lived. In the end you put a lot of time into a relationship and when it ends you have nothing to show for it.

It may not seem like much when your 20 , or 30 maybe even not 40 , but there will come a time when you are going to need more , and your needs will out weigh your wants. Once you hit 30 time does fly….

dirt

vileschair
Our New Toy

Vile

Our Total Power Exchange

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, adapting, Argue, Arianna, Baby Girl, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Munch, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Slave training, BDSM Structure, commitment, communication, compatibility, consequences, control, Daddy Dom, Discipline, Dominant, Dominants Protocol, MAST, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Masters And Slaves Together, molding your slave, munchs, owned property, Owned Slave, Protocol public, Protocols, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Submission, TPE, training your slave, Training your submissive on June 3, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I searched for some two years for what I will call the perfect partner. I was extremely tired of settling for less when I knew a relationship was not going to work. Maybe I did it because of the companionship , a steady piece of ass , or maybe because I love a challenge I was hoping to take something impossible and make it work.

Here is where it gets somewhat tricky. As long as I can remember I have viewed women as objects , toys , here for service and pleasure. There is also another side to that statement. If you were not submissive Id id not try to push my beliefs on you nor would I try and change you.
I gave those the up most respect. Today I have females who are friends who are not in the lifestyle and I do not discuss the lifestyle in anyway. There are those who I have bent over backwards to help who are not in the lifestyle. So the above statement does not pertain to everyone.

I may not know everything and I have never claimed to know everything but I do know if you do not have a plan , if you do not have some kind of idea when it comes to the type of relationship you want, or the type of Baby Girl , submissive or slave it will never work. These are the people who settle for less. These are the Dominants who try to change someone into someone they are not and it never works. So he ends up exerting all of this energy and time to only find it has been wasted and the slave takes the blame.

Those who are new to the lifestyle are easy targets , they have this huge target on their shirt that says , Hi I am new and I am Gullible.

Although I have had 3 or 4 long term relationships , it was not until many years down the road that I realized I had not defined who or what I was.
Defining myself was a huge piece of the puzzle and without that piece I could never complete the puzzle.

While standing on the side of a canal one night thinking , Animel and I had just left a Chinese Buffet , where I met a woman who knew me but I did not know her and she was scared to death of me, I blogged about this before.

While thinking it hit me like an asteroid , WOW you stupid mother fucker you have had the last few pieces of the puzzle all along you just were not ready to complete it or maybe I was not ready.

I was more concerned about the next piece of ass , the next blow job , or who I could inflict pain on. I was a sadist for many years but I was not a Dominant. Mainly because I did not want that kind of responsibility , nor did I care , or maybe I did not have a clue.

So lets look at the three Basic types of Dominants , first is the Daddy Dom , I know of one I can say I respect and I believe their relationship is steadily evolving , into something more, John Brownstone. Most Daddy Doms are married and cheating. Most daddy Doms are not active in the local community due to the fact of being married, most do not impose rules or structure again because of the responsibility….

This is from a profile on Fetlife………. FInally I seek discreetion as I am married to a ultra-vanilla wife who has zero interest in the lifestyle and hope to eventually find my sub who knows she will be treasured.

Just how fucked up is this? His wife has no clue and as far as she knows everything is fine, and I am sure if she read his profile she would run. So my question is , why not just leave ? The remark She will be Treasured is a total lie because he will not be able to dedicate this time needed. Because when he is needed he will not be able to be there for her.

The Dominant who is Dominant but he is not in complete charge nor is he in control 100% of the time because his submissive has the right to say no even when it comes to following rules. The Dominant is only in charge when the submissive allows him to be in charge. The submissive will only follow rules when it is convenient or they are feeling submissive.

Those who do not live together do not have a clear understand of how a power exchange relationship works. This is because the Dominant clearly has no control over the relationship nor is the submissive able to submit on a regular basis. Training cannot be done and this is because Training has to be daily and consistent. It is not like a book where you read a few chapters , put it down and pick back up a week later.

Total Power Exchange..

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Total power exchange)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which “love” is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.
The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Outside the BDSM community, the relationship of Master/slave is sometimes regarded as a form of consensual sexual slavery. In BDSM, a slave is a specific type of submissive. The Master/slave relationship refers to the relationship between the individuals involved, and does not necessarily require any specific acts, sexual or otherwise, though sexual activity is usually an aspect of the relationship. The sexual aspect could be conventional, and not necessarily BDSM. A slave could also be a masochist or bottom, but this is not always the case.[2]

Some participants regard the relationship as sexual roleplay, while others enter into the relationship on the basis of a highly committed, long-term, submissive lifestyle.

Some practitioners feel the difference between submissive and slave is the degree of submission. However, many who are involved in Master/slave relationships see the difference as being conceptual. For example, some slaves may not have a naturally submissive personality, but choose to surrender their will and volition to another.

Slave Training

Slave training is a BDSM activity usually involving a consensual power exchange between two people taking on the roles of a Master or Mistress and a slave. The objective is to change the slave’s behavior in a manner that is pleasing to the Master or Mistress, for example to train the slave to follow a set of rules or commands that the Master or Mistress has provided.

Slave training can be a learning process both for the slave (or submissive) and for the Master or Mistress (or Dominant). Training is usually defined in clear steps or lesson plans before it begins. The Master or Mistress teaches the slave how to speak, act and think in a way that is pleasing the Master or Mistress. The slave, in return, derives pleasure from being able to please and serve the Master or Mistress. The slave may also be rewarded tangibly, such as with food, a bed, etc

Training is something I have believed in for sometime , and although in previous relationships there was training , it was nothing compared to the training Arianna went through. Maybe one reason is I was not really ready to settle down, or maybe I had never found the one.
To change ones behavior , the way someone talks, dresses , speaks as well as to others. Hair color, nail polish really everything. I mold to fit my needs. I mold to benefit the slave , my slave.
Every rule I have in place is to benefit Arianna not me, after all the relationship is to insure she is taken care of. I however do come first that includes eating.

I would suspect many relationships fail because there is not a clear understanding prior to entering a relationship. This is due to both trying to be politically correct in fear of not being accepted , or rejected. If both are not upfront about their needs in fear of losing a potential will still end in a total disaster.

A Kinkster is just Kinky , A submissive submits because it is a need but submits on their terms. A slave you needs a TPE relationship Total Power Exchange gives herself or himself because it is a need.
The TPE does not make one weak as most think , Arianna has a degree and has had the same employer for almost 16 years.

What people do not understand is everyone is different , everyone has different needs. Every Dominant , Daddy and Master are different but many times people are to quick to judge and tell others how they are doing it wrong.
The people telling others who are wrong are the ones who are fucked up. There is no BDSM bible and while there is a lot of literature on this subject you are reading someones opinion , just like what I write is my opinion.

Our TPE Total Power Exchange was worked out prior to entering a relationship , it was not something I was interested in but I felt we had enough in common to move forward and give it a try.

I control everything in our home , to include what Arianna wears , hair color , bed time and what time to wake, what she eats. Most of the time I leave cooking up to her but at times I tell her what I want to eat. While I am in full control of the finances I do let Arianna take care of that end, but I know where every penny is spent.

The relationship started out as consensual and today it is still consensual , through our communication and being open with each other , I am proud to say it has been almost 3 years and to date we still have not had an argument. I have not raised my voice nor have I called her any names out of anger.

I have a firm rule I follow , I never lose my temper towards the one who gets on their knees or lays on their back and takes what I have to give.

We are going through changes and our relationship is still continuing to grow, now Arianna is always looking for more ways to submit. As we grow and talk she still wants to dig deeper into her submission.
I will admit she does keep me on my toes and keeps me thinking. My question or thoughts are how deep can one go ? Is there an end or does one continue to travel deeper ?
Ia m going to implement more protocols that will be a reminder of who she is. Just as speaking in thirds which she has mastered , that is a reminder and today she does not even think about the way she is talking and is able to change once out in public.

Putting protocols in place provides structure, structure provides a stable relationship , and then comes communication.
I can say without a Doubt and in Honesty I run my house. I am head cheese , Head Honcho , the king and Emperor. That is something i had to earn it was not giving nor was it demanded , it was earned.

respect

Vile

My Short Story Is Out. The Breaking Of Sabrina

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, Breaking a Slave, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, control, controlling, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominant, FaceBook Vile Woods, http://leabarrymire.blogspot.com/2013/02/demystifying-male-15.html?zx=becc23191815c038, https://www.facebook.com/lea.barrymire., Humiliation, Humiliation Training, masochist, Master And Slave, non-consensual, Owned Slave, owning a slave, Pain Slut, sadist, SADOMASOCHISM, slave, Stockholm syndrome, Submission, submissive with tags , , on July 14, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

One Complaint, to short.

I have been in three TPE relationships over the past twenty something years TPE.
My first Slave Sherri , was a total masochist, and was into deep humiliation, and a total pain slut. The only time I ever seen her cry was the day I told her it was over.

In the beginning the relationship was a lot of fun, but as time went on it grew old, because it became more of a job.

I guess one reason was I never developed any real feelings for Sherri, and I cannot explain why, unless it was her three kids.

My second was Bea who I truly thought I was in love, but I now realize I was not. I cared for Bea but I now know it was not Love..

I know this now because my now wife and Slave, I am deeply in love and I truly cherish her. I hate being away from from her on a daily basis but I know it is only a short time.

The thing I want to point out is each Slave was different, each had a different personality, but most important each had different needs.
So the way each was handled was different, the same rules, or protocols would not of worked for either.

You have to be able to open ones mind so to speak and take a walk around in their brain.

Sherri was not hard because I was told what and how to do something . I understand more today than I did then.

Bea was a little more of a struggle. Once I knew her, then I had to figure out how she thought, what made her tick, what made her want to cut herself, once I was able to communicate with her on her level and the more I understood her, the less of cutting there was until it stopped all together.

Arianna was a task in the beginning , it was not until I had access to her journals did I grow to have a clear understanding of what made her tick..

So each and everyone of us is different, every Dominant, and Master, every Submissive and Slave. It is finding the one who fits your needs.
If you rush without really looking at the whole picture you could fall prey.

Which now brings me to my short story, being a sadist at one time, I was able to clear my mind and take a walk. I actually viewed myself in the book, the only difference is I would of never trained Sabrina for someone else she would of been for my own use.

Which Brings us to The Subject of Stockholm Syndrome. A human can be broke in as little as 48 hours under the right conditions.
Now everyone who is taken captive does not suffer from Stockholm. Some are stronger than others.
In the case one does, it is because they develop feelings for their capture, they develop feelings for the one who is abusing them, I know its weird. No one really knows what sets that timer off.

I saw myself, how would I break someone if I was going to take that type of path. Starting out with pure fear, and humiliation, then moving to a more caring individual. Those steps I believe may have to be repeated it would depend on who you were trying to break….

So here is the link it is a very short story, but at the end you should see the purpose of the book..

There is one more coming out sometime in November I do believe, it will be much longer, and it will be Non-Fiction. It will be about the life of a master and slave, and the safety steps you should take when looking for a relationship.

Much love to everyone who has stopped by over the last two years.
As always feel free to drop me an email
viledesires62@aol.com

Smashwords (for all but Kindle users): https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/457549

Amazon/Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00LRZLRUO

Coming soon to B&N, iBooks, KOBO and other retailersbreak

I want to thank Arianna for giving us such a great cover. Lea Barrymire did finish it up for us…

If you do make a purchase please leave a review, good or bad, but keep an open mind when reading it.

Vile

Introducing BDSM To The Home

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, anal sex, Arianna, ass fucking, bdsm, Collar, Collars, commitment, communication, consistent, control, Dominance, Dominant, Dominants, emotional, Fake Dominants, Fantasy, Humiliation, Introducing BDSM To The Home, Loyal, Lube, Married submissive, Master, Master And Slave, masturbation, oral sex, Owned Slave, predators, Punishment, Rules, Security, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock on March 30, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

This can be very difficult but if the communication is right and both parties are open minded enough it could work. There are more than a few ways the idea could come into play, some are good while some are not so good.

The male will take one of three stances, yes , no , or maybe. This is it being brought up to him. Much of the time a male needs time to roll ideas through his mind. The main thought is what do I get out of this if I have to put any effort into it. I have to get something or its just not worth my time.

The female however will take two stances on the subject it will either be yes or no, there is no maybe. Just as I brought up the idea and the need I had to my ex-wife, but I got the your fucking perverted . It took you seven years to come to that conclusion congratulations you stupid bitch. So yes it does pay to be honest at all times even if you do not get the out come you had hoped for..

Most men who say NO or let me think about it truly have this guilty feeling, because no matter how you explain it, it is still drilled in their mind that it is abuse. Somehow being tied up , spanked, told what to do, or face fucking is abuse.

How ever those who stray have no problem bending some bitch over and dry fucking her ass until she passes out. Why ? I suppose there is no real connection between the two, there is no love between the two. The male does not feel ashamed doing what he is doing because it is now expected. With his wife he was exploring uncharted territory or he knows she is against any type of kink

If your a woman who is married and you have been asked to suck cock, or do anal and you refuse he will find someone who will do those things for him. He may not leave you and the chances of him leaving is very slim. The main reason is he has already built his kingdom, he feels secure, he feels safe, and he knows you are not going anyplace. He will how ever step out on you, and find someone who will fulfill his needs.

While you can get pissed off, while you can scream and yell because how dare he let some other women suck his cock.  Think about how you refused to. The worst thing you can tell a male is NO, because when say say that one word it now becomes a need, and vengeance will be his.

I believe sex falls under wifely duties, short of being abuse you are meant to please, now that does not mean you do not get anything in return because any relationship was meant to be a two way street. You as the wife are suppose to lay on your back, get on your knees, or on your hands and knees bent over spreading your ass. Everyone is not going to think the way I do and that is fine, I am expressing my own opinion. The husband has duties as well, and I have covered much of that in my 800 and something post. I have covered the abusive male, so do not think for one minute I am about abuse because I am not.

The key to a successful relationship is finding someone you are compatible with, you like the same music, food, going out, walking the beach at night, and then yes this also includes sex.

While I was searching for a partner I dated probably a 100 who thought they were slaves, and I refused to settle for less, if you told me you did not suck cock, the conversation was over, if you told me you did not do anal the conversation was over, which means I just blew 30 bucks for dinner, and I was going to go home and jack off. If you settle for less you will never be happy, you are only happy for that moment and time.

The man brings up BDSM to the wife and she may go along with it just to please, but most of the time the male gets a little rough because why? We are visual he has googled BDSM clicked on images and what do you see? Some bitch getting her ass beat. So he truly has no clue, or he has read some stories on erotica.com. The woman if she is in love enough or she thinks it will improve their already soggy relationship she will go along with it for a while, only to find out things are still soggy.

Now the female brings it up, now we are in a whole different ball game, the rules have changed, because what she is thinking is nothing the way the male see’s how things might turn out.

The woman has thought things out for the most. The woman can see herself living as a slave 24/7. She can see in her mind how it would be her living as a slave. The truth is she thinks about it for a long time before bringing the subject up, for a couple of reasons. One she is ashamed of her now kinky thoughts, second she is afraid of rejection, or third she is afraid you the husband will leave because she is not the woman you married..

Now while you the husband knows nothing of this, while your at work and she is at home having full blown fantasies, your working and she is at home pounding her pussy with something , and she is probably masturbating 3 or 4 times a day. Even while your fucking her she is thinking about kinky things and you do not have a clue.

To the male most of the time it is about kink, giving out orders, bondage, subjecting your wife to pain she does not want.

To the female it is much different, the submission is a need, to be a total slave is a need, because she has already thought it out. The fact is once she has already put all of her thoughts into motion you the male only has a small role to play in your new relationship, and it really takes very little of your time. She the slave is going to do most of the work all you have to do is keep things consistent.

Really the only thing you the husband has to do is except her for who and what she is. Let her ask for permission, write down a few chores. Come up with a few realistic rules, rules that you know will not be broken. The last thing a slave wants to do is break any rules, if they do it is truly a mistake.

She the wife is looking to be excepted, she wants to be able to be who is is and needs to be. When it comes to women this is not something that just happened on the contrary this has been brewing for a very long time. There was something at a young age that had a mental impact on her, something happened that more than likely she has not even shared with you. She could of been raped, maybe molested by a family member, or even abused at home, but something happened when she was younger to trigger her thoughts. I am not saying that is accurate 100% of the time but I will say 95% maybe a little higher. Most suffer from some type of depression, some are bi-polar, some suffer from anxiety , and most are on some type of medication.

That is what these men who prey on women do not realize or if they do they do not care. These women are looking for help, they are looking for someone to except them, they are looking for security. They expect the kink, why ? Because we are visual animals and nothing more, now some do enjoy the kink, some need the kink. These men prey on those who are submissive because they see it as a weakness, they see an easy fuck, or when they are talking to you the only thing on their mind is you sucking their cock.

I preach over and over when your first meeting a new Dom keep your legs close and your mouth shut, find out if he is really interested in you, or if he just wants the pussy.

Let your wife be who she needs to be, the only thing that will happen for you the male is your life will get a whole lot better. You as the husband will want for nothing, your every need will be answered without question. There will be total submission, and this submission will only benefit you, and remember your role is very small, it is not going to add to your day.

Think about it, you have what most men only ready about, you have what most men talk about when out with the boys.

You have someone you can dress how you want, eat what you tell them to eat, they feel good because you have giving them task. You get your cock sucked when and how you want, she will lay on her back at the snap of a finger, and will proudly lube your cock for her ass. She will be loyal to you and only you, you are not replaceable the main reason is she has gone through to much to get your relationship where it is at today. If she strayed she would have to start all over.

The collar this is a biggie. The collar is a sign of ownership. She now has a purpose, she now belongs, she is now who she truly needs to be not wants to be who she needs to be.

That is what we do as husbands we meet ours needs. Your wife, your slave we still need to provide their needs, we have an obligation to meet their needs, we have an obligation to make them feel wanted, and we have an obligation to reward when the time is right.

The wife or slave has done everything to insure the home is ran smoothly, she takes care of you without question. To make her feel complete is something we should have a need to do. The collar will bring out someone very special, and your relationship will blossom it grow 100 times over and end the end it will only benefit you.

Long ago I only use to see married slaves or more so those who were submissive. These were women who were not able to express their needs to their husbands, or their husbands thought they were sick.

I had hours and hours of sessions, which mainly included bondage some lite spanking never any bruises, and a lot of humiliation. I how ever never fucked anyone of them, there was never any penetration vaginal or anal. I did leave cock sucking out. I did get my cock sucked. If I was going to spend a couple of hours of my time pleasing you because hubby would not, you were going to suck my cock. I did that for a year or so, because I was not looking for any type of commitment. She got a motel most of the time, she paid for it, took us out to dinner, and I got to play with her, and I got to watch my cock slide down her throat.

I suppose it goes the same way, if the submissive or slave is not getting what they need they will seek out those who will give. This is not every case though. Many just sit at home and suffer with their thoughts to afraid to bring the topic up.

Let your wife be who she needs to be, it will cost you very little time. Let her be the slave she needs to be, let her be humble and thankful laying at your feet. While she reaches up and touches her collar, knowing that she is loved, cared for and owned.

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Vile

My Way Of Thinking

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Argue, Arianna, bdsm, commitment, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, Dominants, Local events, MAST, Master & Slave, Master And Slave, needy, Owned Slave, owning a slave, poly, poly slaves, sex, slave, Slave Onwer, Structure, Submission, submissive, sucking cock on February 7, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I need that control, it is like I thrive, it is like fuel. That is one thing we all have to master. The Mastery of being in control.

Some say I am somewhat unethical in the way I run our relationship. Most will say I am to strict. Most say I have to much control. They may be right in everything they are saying, but the key factor is. It is not their house. So in the end they can think what ever they want but it does not matter they have no control over me or how I run my home.

That being said. My entire world revolves around Arianna. She is the only one I care about. She is the only one I have to take care of or worry about.

The other night we were talking about somethings I liked but she was more than willing to follow through with things. One she is a Slave, but two and the most important she loves and cares about me.

So I have to think about her. What the outcome would be doing things she is not happy with. I have to think if I do this what is it going to do to her mentally .

Also just like my ex wife, after I opened up about my kink and my needs she had agreed to try something. The first was spanking. I could see immediately that she was getting nothing out of it. That being the case It was less of a turn on to me, and in the end it did nothing for me.

Before we act we need to think of the submissive or slave. Most will go along with pretty much anything if they think they are pleasing. It is the inner thoughts we never know about, or what effects it is having on them.

Then there is the other side. If the Dominant has been up front about everything and his needs are agreed on, then there is no guilt.

Most who are not who they say they are, and they prey on the submissive, generally have no feelings about the other nor is it ever a thought. These guys are getting what they want and nothing more.

As far as the poly thing goes I have talked to other Dominants about it. When I ask why do you need more than one slave, the only answer I get is I need more flavor. It is never how it could benefit the house or the other slave. So I wonder when the Dominant explains to the slave how they need more flavor. How does that make the slave feel ? How does it make the slave feel knowing their owner needs more than one to fill complete.

Let me explain something. Most poly relationships are not live in situations. Most live apart. Although there are some family’s that live together for the most that is not the case. So the Slave who does not live with the couple , seems to me they are just a piece of ass on the side. The Dominant usually has full control over the third. At times there is a third Then another reason is maybe the first slave is not into pain. So the Master seeks out to a Masochist, again they do not live together. These types of relationships are short lived, it does not take the third long to figure out they will always be on the other side of the fence.

The second scenario the three live together. They can either have separate bedrooms or all three can sleep together. Now why bring another into a relationship that is going good?

One reason would be to take some of the load off of the first slave. Be it task, shopping, cleaning, and I suppose to fill in for the other kinks the first one is not happy with doing. The two form a bond, almost to the point of being a sister. They become inseparable, and grow to depend on each other. This type of relationship can work, I have seen it work, I have made it work in the past. It takes a great deal of time, but it can happen.

The main two the Master and Slave have to talk about the up’s and downs and the what if’s . Then the Master needs to decide if a third is really needed.

The other thing that bothers me at times. It is really hard for a slave to make friends outside of the home. Arianna knows this first hand. Everyone she has met seemed okay in the beginning but in the end they turned out to be flakes. So I decided that I would step up to the plate and I would choose her friends. Well It turns out I didn’t know people as well as I thoughts I did. They were still flakes, full of problems, full of drama. So maybe one day Arianna will find that one she can truly call a friend.

When I had talked about a third that was really my reasoning behind the whole thing. The truth is Arianna is way to insecure for such an adventure . That is not her fault nor is it mine, it just is, and I am good with that.

So my way of thinking along with the above. I do consider myself an owner, even in today’s times to some that is kinda hard to grasp. My slave has giving herself willingly and without question. Our relationship is consensual in all aspects. I am the owner of living property. I am Master because that is what she chooses to call me.

I asked her recently if she would like to call me My Owner although she does say that sometimes , she said it made her feel distant. I do understand.

My way Of thinking being an owner of property. It gives me many rights. I have the right to use as I see fit. Although before entering the relationship we did negotiate on some things, more on her side, because I refused to budge on my needs. On the things she is against , I respect her stance on somethings. It is my responsibility to insure she remains in good health not only physically but mentally.

I told Arianna from the beginning. The word NO does not come out of her mouth. I also explained that I would use her and use on a regular basis. I am speaking of sex of course. Again that is my right as an owner of property.

Let me explain what gives me these rights. I from the start of the relationship have kept my word. I have done everything I said I would do and much much more. I have stepped up to the plate, every time, and will continue to do so. I have been completely honest, I have never lied to her. I have remained consistent. She does know my main focus is on her, she does know that no matter what I will be there for her.

My way of thinking. I lead she will follow without question.

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Vile

Arianna’s Post Permission

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, An Owned Slave, anal sex, Argue, ass fucking, bdsm, blow job, communication, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, control, Dominance, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, fucking, Humiliation, Inservice Slave, Master, Owned Slave, owning a slave, Patience, Protocol, Protocol public, Rules, serve, session, slave, slave dress, Slave no rights, submissive, sucking cock, sucking dick, Total Slavery on December 12, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

http://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/author/vilesarianna/

If you read Arianna’s blog about permission that is what I was speaking about the first ninety days of training. Going through a reprogramming , so to speak.

You take everything away that someone was use to having on a daily basis , and slowly return some. I never at one time explained to Arianna what I was going to do, or what I plans were. The only thing I assured her of was she would not be hurt.

I would think and we have not talked in great detail about the first ninety days, but my take is there would be a great deal of humiliation. The humiliation factor coming from telling an adult what they can do and what they cannot do.

I took away furniture, I took away clothes, if people visited she could dress but it was minimal. at times she would sit on the floor while I ate dinner in front of other people and I would feed her. At times she was cuffed to the table while eating.

I limited her space within the home, not allowing her to sit on any furniture , or standing next to me. She now was not allowed to pick her clothes besides her work clothes, everything else was picked out for her. She now had to sleep nude, unless that time of the month.

Slave dress I bought two of the ugliest cotton dresses that went almost to the floor, when she was not nude she had to wear what I had bought. I had even had her wear in public a couple of times while going to the store. .

Although I did not take her money I did take full control of it. Arianna now had to account for every penny she spent. She had to keep a daily log two of them as a matter of fact. One in the car and one for home. Before leaving the house she had to write time and mileage, once home she had to account for just about every minute. She could no longer just go to the bathroom, she had to have permission, she had to ask even if people were present, it is the same with taking a shower.

Sex she would be clean and available , if I wanted to fuck she would lay and spread at times no foreplay at all. I would just stick my cock in blow my load and walk away. If I want my cock sucked I snapped my fingers.

Behavioral modification you take someones life and turn it inside out. The key to everything was consistency and being consistent was a huge part I had to play, making sure I did not bend or give in.

Now many of you are probably thinking , what the fuck, how could you treat someone in this manner ? Or how could someone live as she does.

The micromanage part is something she needed, and she needed on a daily basis, and hourly basis. So it was something that was discussed prior to us entering a relationship.

When I first met Arianna she was totally out of control, work, home life everything about her was just a mess. At that time she was seeing a couple who were being abusive towards her, not so much the wife but the husband.

Those of you who are submissive or a slave you know how easy it is to get out of control. It does not mean anything bad, it means there is something lacking. Someone to guide you, take care of emotionally, the lack of structure.

Before I met Arianna I had been searching for over a year, but I was looking for a sex slave, a long term relationship but someone I could just use when I had the need, still a D’s ran home just not as strict. I was not looking for a maid, I cleaned my own house, I was not looking for a cook, I enjoy cooking, I did my own laundry. I was looking for a Sex Slave, someone I could just pump when I wanted, someone to suck my cock when I wanted, anal sex when I wanted and bondage.

The first time I met Arianna and she got out of her car I almost spit my coffee out, I was thinking look at this fine Bitch here, WOW. We spent a couple of hours talking and the next day she came back over. The second visit I knew she was had.

When she began explaining her needs I just sit there thinking, do I want to invest all that time, fuck I am 50 years old. Really all I was looking for was a fuck toy, nothing more. As we talked I realized we had more in common so I had to give it a great deal of thought.

As I said about the first ninety days being the breaking point that goes for the Dom as well. The time spent is just as hard on the Dom as it is the slave, both are giving and taking. Although the slave gives up much more. The slave gives up their whole life.

A year later and nothing has changed, we are still growing closer to each other, life is good. All the work paid off in more ways than one.

Arianna also made the statement I enjoy helping other slaves and submissive’s that was true before I met her. Today I still offer advice. I have a huge heart when it comes to women, more so those in the lifestyle. I have taken women in and helped get back on their feet, and I expected nothing in return. With the exception of paying their way. No sex ,no sucking cock notta I treated with full respect. The thing is You cannot fix someone they have to want it, they have to need it, if not it is just time wasted.

Today I am not so sure I could offer in person, because Arianna requires so much care, I am not complaining but there is just not enough of me to go around.

So now before you think how could anyone live like Arianna does and be happy. Every Slave is different, every slave has different needs. Every slave requires different care. We are talking about a slave not a submissive. A submissive may submit on their terms and after play or a session, they return to their normal lives. That is true in most cases, although a submissive enjoys serving, the submissive can impose limits. A slave has no limits, the only limits are those that are giving to by their owner.

I am a Husband , I am a Dominant but I am also an owner, Arianna is my property. This relationship is purely consensual . It was and is a consensual  agreement before entering the relationship. I put all the cards out on the table. If I agreed to be the Dominant she needed Arianna had to be the slave I needed, and I told her I refuse to bend. If you want to be my Bitch, you live in my house , my rules no questions asked.

In the lifestyle every Dominant could have the same type of relationship we do, maybe not as in depth but the same service, no arguing, no drama. The thing is it is so fucking simple, sure I get tired from working 55 hours a week, I get stressed I just hold it better than most, but at the end of the day I made an agreement, no matter how tired or stressed I am, I still have a responsibility and in the end it does pay off.

You cannot want to be a slave, you have to need it, you have to have a burning desire. You have to crave it, crave the control. TPE Total Power Exchange.

A slave has no control. A slave is owned property who obeys…period. She may respectfully discuss and share her feelings with her Master, but he makes the final decision, and she must abide by it. If she doesn’t , then she is dealt with harshly.

We must respect one another, we must respect how others want to live and be treated, we must be open minded enough so we can try to understand others. The one thing we must bot do is judge people because of their needs.

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Vile

Part Time Collar’s

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, Bdsm events, Collar, Collars, communication, Fake Dominants, Master, Owned Slave, owning a slave, slave, submissive on November 20, 2013 by thekinkyworldofvile

Here put this on , you are now my Slave. Look I know we just met , but it feels like I have known you forever , here wear my collar.  I know it is our first date, but I would really like to collar you.  Go to Adam & Eve and pick out a collar, find one you like and I will buy it for you.

I am sure if your a submissive or slave you have heard these if not I can assure you that you will. Those are either Desperate Dominants or just plain flakes. What kills me is a Dominant who is looking for a long term relationship will settle for way less than what he is really looking for, but here is the thing if he does this, your relationship will be cut short six months tops. You the slave are just there for the ass and nothing more, you are an object nothing more. Once the Dom feels he can upgrade he will drop you like a bad cold.

This is true Arianna and I just witnessed the same thing.  A Dom moved in with a Baby Girl, and as soon as he moved in he wanted a second female. What he was doing the whole time was finding a replacement. Well go fuck him he thought he had found one then two then three then four, and he has been dumped every time. Then he comes crawling back wanting to work it out and she tells him to go fuck himself. Good for her.

Now on the other side of the fence, you are a D’s or M’s couple you have been together for a while and you have a collar, but you only wear it when your at home , or when the two of you go out or you wear it during play.

I have a huge problem with this. When your at work do you take your wedding ring off.? Okay so you cannot wear a leather spiked collar to work that is very understandable. I would never make Arianna wear such a collar to begin with. I can say though Arianna’s collar has not been off since the day I put it on and locked it.

Most of the of the Eternity collars can be worn everyday, they even have anklets that can be worn. Since Arianna started wearing hers one person has made a comment about her collar at work and that was another slave wearing one.

http://www.eternitycollars.com/lp/eternity-original-collection-locking-collars.html?gclid=CJHSk-Dz87oCFcRi7AodOWsA3Q

The point I am trying to get across here is even if not a collar but something to wear on a daily basis, when you touch, when you feel it gives you that feeling of being owned. I do believe that is the feeling your after anyway is it not ? The feeling of being owned puts you in that safe place. The feeling of being owned makes you feel complete , loved and cared for. It does not have to be a Thick leather collar, but something you never take off.

Arianna has pointed out to me while at functions the Slaves who were not wearing collars. A collar is something you should wear with pride. Just because you wear a collar does not mean you have to explain anything to anyone. I am sure you have seen others wear jewelry that you did not like.

I know if I were a Slave and my future owner tried to give me a cheap ass piece of leather he bout at the flea market, I would be thanks but no thanks you wear the mother fucker.

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You get the picture, there is a Collar for everyone

Vile