Archive for the professional Dominatrix Category

I would like to know what a professional Dominatrix Is

Posted in bdsm, professional Dominatrix on July 31, 2012 by thekinkyworldofvile

Dominatrix (plural dominatrixes or dominatrices) or mistress is a woman or women who takes the dominant role in bondage, discipline (in sexual-fetish sense of the word) and sadomasochism, or BDSM. A common form of address for a submissive to a dominatrix is “mistress”, “ma’am”, “domina” or “maîtresse”. Note that a dominatrix does not necessarily dominate a male partner; a dominatrix may well have female submissives, nor must the role of a dominatrix involve pain toward the submissive; her domination can be verbal, involving humiliating tasks and servitude.

The term “domme” (play /ˈdɒm/) is a coined pseudo-French female variation of the slang dom (short for dominant). It stems from the Latin words “dominus” = master, “domina” = mistress. The pronunciation is identical to the term dom, by analogy to one-syllable French-derived words like femme or blonde.

Now The Dominant or Master

In BDSM, a top or dominant is the partner in a BDSM relationship or in a BDSM scene who takes the active or controlling role over that of the bottom or submissive partner(s).

A person who submits control of a large percentage of his or her day-to-day life to a dominant partner, or who submits within a formal set of rules and rituals, is the slave, and the person who assumes power over the slave is the master or mistress.

Terminology

Agreement on the exact meanings of the following terms is far from universal. For example, the function of tops and dominants is similar, and, in many cases, overlaps, but while the terms are used interchangeably in some discussions, there are differences between the two.

The top is the actor within the BDSM context who applies to the bottom partner(s) the techniques of a sexual, sensual, and psychological activity: flogging, bondage, servitude, or humiliation. The dominant controls the BDSM scene or relationship, exercising authority over the submissive partner(s). A dominant who exercises control over a large percentage of a submissive’s day-to-day life, or within a formal framework of rules and rituals, is a master or mistress.

The functions of top and dominant often intersect, where the top is the dominant, but this is not always the case. Someone who is “topping” may be doing so at the request, or even the direction, of a bottom partner; in this case, the bottom is the dominant partner. A top who acts within this kind of relationship dynamic is sometimes called a service top. A bottom who has dominance over the activities or the relationship is said to be topping from the bottom, even though he or she is really exercising dominance from the bottom. Another possibility is that the top and bottom are acting at the direction of a third, directing person.

Within communities of lifestyle BDSM devotees, there exists a widespread prejudice against both those who act as service tops and those who top from the bottom. Both are considered by many to be failing to achieve a proper BDSM relationship dynamic, especially, if the partners are purported to be trying to achieve a dominant-top/submissive-bottom relationship.

While it is possible that a dominant would not act as a top and thus have no expression of his or her control through kink– or fetish-based activities, it may be argued that such a relationship, lacking any erotic aspect to the exercise of control, would fall outside of the BDSM context.

Tops or dominants who also assume a bottom or submissive role are referred to as switches.

Master or Mistress

Master or “Mistress” is one of the honorifics some people use to describe the dominant partner or “owner” in a Master/slave relationship. Because it is an honorific of the dominant form it is usual for it to be written with a capital letter.

It might also be used by the submissive partner as an honorific term in a D/s relationship. This can cause confusion when trying to understand BDSM terminology as both “Master” or “Mistress” and “slave” might be used – as terms of endearment – even though neither considers himself to be owned nor owner.

Some people enjoy the connotations of servitude or submission in calling their partner “Master”, or being called “Master”. To others the ritual of such a formal mode of address may be appealing. It may also be useful in building roles in which one partner or the other may indulge in sadistic or masochistic desires, although people living as Master and slave are not necessarily sadomasochistic.

Usage of “Master” or “Mistress” in most BDSM environments does not imply any specific expertise, abilities, or formal training. To successfully maintain a Master or Mistress/slave relationship takes abilities and skills beyond or apart from normal relationship skills.

The term “Master” can be gender-independent but is mostly used only in reference to males. There is otherwise no male-specific equivalent. The female equivalent is “Mistress” or possibly dominatrix.

Although the Master is understood to have authority over the slave in some sense, this never extends to one’s legal rights and thus there must always be an implicit element of consent involved.

Now most of the time when you hear Professional Dominatrix this first thing that comes to mind is someone who gets paid. I know a Dominatrix here local that pulls in 150 an hr, sometimes more. I have had people call me, and want to know if I know of a Pro Domme . I get the guys number and screen a little to make sure he is not a nut case. The I call and she decides , I never know if she see’s who ever we do not get into that part. I do know I would not want to be in the same room with her. Fuck that.

I am just not sure where the Professional part comes in. I have been in the lifestyle for 20 years, Does that make me a professional Dominant?

There are no BDSM School’s well that is not true, there are and you pay, to go through. These are ran by Dominants as well.

Here is the thing and I have covered this before, there are no books, literature, with the exception of what is available on the Web. What is on the web is others opinion’s , just like I have my own opinion.

20 years go when I saw my first slave what I knew to be a slave, was really my first hands on, and a Masochist at that. I said be fore I learned much. I met other Dominants in the area, and listened and watched, and over a period of year I put my own style together. Many think I am to strict, many think, I carry things to far. Many think my protocol is out of line. Do I care not in the least I am me.

I am not speaking badly of Dommes or Dominatrix, you will never hear me bad mouth another Dominant, I may not always agree, but he has put his own style together.

I am who I am, The lifestyle is not a means of support, even in a relationship is the submissive works, everything goes together just like a vanilla relationship. She handles all the bills.

I was just curious if someone could enlighten me…..

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Vile