To the new submissive this is a very common thing, many new to the lifestyle really has no clue what to expect from a new dominant. The submissive really has no idea about the lifestyle, only what they have read, and if you frequent chat rooms. I have not been in a chat room in years.
Every Dominant when it comes to training is different, their rules, protocols, and expectations of their submissive.Every Dominant has different needs, some are just about sex, while others are more interested in service, or both. Some want their subs to excel in life, while others hold back, and just use. So it is very important as you the submissive to find your click.
One thing I can tell you from experience, there are a lot of predators, those who seek out who they believe to be weak. Those who use, and toss aside, when done or they have grown bored. Then the search starts all over. One thing about a submissive, is when she has a bad experience most times she just wash’s her hands and moves on….
When I first meet a new submissive or slave, I want to spend a great deal of time getting to know her. Although sex may come up at times, that should not be the main topic of your conversations. You want to know how they think, what they like? what makes them happy, angry, foods they lie, movies, you get the drift.
Many Dominants will come off playing the Dom card. Hear me Roar, I am Master you are Bitch. While there are those who are true and sincere, those who truly want a relationship.
The two should take the time to learn each other, become friends, best friends, talk, laugh joke. These things are first and foremost. If you start out with a sexual relationship or if you live long distance you start out on a webcam putting on little shows. There is a very good chance your relationship is going no where fast. No real Dominant would even consider asking you the submissive to get naked on cam or masturbate on cam. If he does guess what he is just jacking off getting off at your expense, and he will grow tired, there is only so much you can do on cam.
One of the biggest jokes I have heard is how they are going to put their submissive through cock sucking training, anal training. Are you serious? Now while it is true not every sub or slave may be good at sucking cock, then the dominant can teach, but to come out and say training. This happens mostly on the first meet, and 99% of the time the submissive will comply, going to a motel on the first meeting. The Dom brings a small bag, which is always in the trunk of his car. Chances are he is married, if he wants to get a motel, and yes he will expect you to pay for half if not all. I am not saying this happens all the time, but in most cases the sub flips the bill. So in his bad, a little rope, maybe a dildo, or vibrator. Now think about this, would you want a toy used on you, that has been used on someone else. I would not think so. Maybe a pair of cuff’s, maybe some lube.
If you are seeing a Dominant and you are having a long distance relationship, do not think you are the only one he is seeing. I know many Doms , and no you are not the only one. He has several, on the side, but your going to think what you want, you have to find out on your own… A good Dom will always find a way to make time for his, no matter what.
Just be careful when first meeting, never session on the first meeting, never go to a motel on the first meeting. Ask why cant we go back to your place. If he gives an excuse then you know he is probably married. It does not bother some women to see married men, just do not get any ideas he is going to leave his wife, he has the best of both worlds, his wife and a piece of ass on the side. More so if he has children and owns a home, he is not going to risk having to give up anything. If he is fucking around on his wife, he is fucking around on you.
Make a list, what you expect out of training, where you want to be in a year, five years, what goals you have, that is real training…