I was sitting on the couch the other day and I was looking at Arianna. I was thinking how fast time has flown by , but what I was really thinking is how lucky I am to have found the perfect Slave , partner and wife.
I cannot say I built our home I have to say both of us built our home. It takes two to build a relationship and it takes two to work together so it can continue to grow.
So for me to sit here and say Look at what I did , would be a false statement. I may of laid down the grown work but without Arianna it would not of been possible.
I am always very cautious of those who use the words I or me on a regular basis. Most who do spend a great deal of time bragging, about what they have done or accomplished.
I am a firm believer we write our own ticket , we decide where and when we are going to go. We are responsible for our decisions, we are responsible for our right and wrongs. It is us to sets the pace in our life and what happens. Now there are times a wrench gets thrown in and we have to back up a little, but staying true in what you believe and do unto others as you would do to them, hmmm did that come out right ?
Although there are not very many people I like , I treat everyone with respect. If I don’t like you I have nothing to do with you. I am not going to get wrapped up in others drama or problems , I have my own house to take care of.
Drama will eat you up from the inside out like a cancer. Drama can destroy your home , drama can and will destroy your relationship no matter who brings it in through the door. It is not fair to bog someone else down with problems. This does mean you do not listen or help a friend in need , but there has to be a limit. Once it becomes a problem or a burden to you , then it is time to cut the rope unless you want to go down with the ship.
Submission is a beautiful thing , It puts you in a peaceful state of mind , the feeling of freedom , the freedom of being who and what you are, and you only have one to answer to. Your Dominant is the only one in your life you have to answer to, well excluding work but you know what I am talking about.
Just like meeting a New Dominant , and being asked about your limits. Well if your new to the life style you really have no idea. Being in a secure relationship with communication allows you to explore that side of you. Maybe you had limits in place, which is normal but as you grow those limits will slowly fade.
On Fetlife I love reading post when a guy says, I am looking for a bitch with no limits. What he is looking for is someone he can abuse and degrade and feel okay about it.
Early last year I was chatting with a Dominant who was mad because his slave left him because she would not fuck who ever he wanted her to. It was his right to make her lay down for who ever. The bad news is she came back , I am guessing maybe a codependent thing , maybe the feeling of being secure.
Can you really love someone if you just pass them around to just anyone ? Your going to fuck and suck who ever I say, where I say and how I say. Can that really be love?
There are those who share , there are those who explore but that is generally worked out between the couple, and there is nothing wrong with that. I myself am not the sharing type, well with a male anyway , a female would be different , but only if Arianna brought it up and she has a few times. Then you have to think about what your going to catch. It is not like it was in the 70’s when you could go get a shot.
You plant the seed , you water it , you fertilize it and it will grow. The same with your relationship. In a relationship your fertilizer is communication , and honesty. This allows the both of you to grow together..
All the kinks , the bondage , the cock sucking , the ass fucking , even to some the humiliation , the control , the submission. All of this comes as you grow , the more communication you have the more you will want to try or do, the more you will want to please the one who is in control.
In a steady long term relationship the submissive , or slave has the need to please and gets pleasure out of pleasing or know they are pleasing the one they are with.
Submission is not something you can demand , respect is not something you can demand. You will call me Sir , you will call me master. Really have you earned that much respect? I just met you why would I call you Sir? Maybe because it makes your ego swell. Maybe it fuels the Dominant inside you. Maybe you should earn that right.
Calling someone Sir or Mam is a lot different when your doing it out of respect than it is when being demanded.
I like the game , playing the game of earning someones respect , then one I am trying to form a relationship with. I like the challenge , I like the finding out how , when and where. I wait for that one word Sir. Then I know without a doubt I have been on the right track. Once you have earned that respect you have a wide open road.
When I met Arianna , I was truthful from the start about who I was and what I needed out of a relationship. I explained everything is such detail she had no questions. I am like that about anything I explain to her. Before I speak I look at every possible question that could be asked , even before Her Training started I explained everything is such detail she had no questions about anything , she just followed.
Following was her greatest down fall because she is one to trust to easy , she thinks other she had seen had her best interest in mind, just as many of you trust to easy. Under the wrong hands it can turn into a bad situation.
Rescuing and submission is not a good combination. You never as a Dominant want to be put in a situation where you are rescuing someone. Many times these are the ones who are wanting you to step in and clean up the mess they made. It is not that they cannot fix it , they just do not want to put in the time or resources it takes to fix.
Entering a relationship many do have some problems and some have problems they have no idea how to fix. If you feel you have a good chance in a long term relationship then it is okay to step in and handle a few things, just make sure your not on the Titanic with a bucket.
I told Arianna , I want you to be able to anticipate my every need. I want you to know when I need something. This was confusing to her at the start of our relationship. She asked me how am I suppose to learn all that , it seems your setting me up for failure?
Watch me and listen , that was the first 90 days of her initial training , and I can tell you the first 90 days was not a very easy task. Training is not made to be easy.
She watched and she listened and to this day she is on top of things. She is because it is a need for her. Her knowing she is pleasing me fuels her submission.
Knowing when someone needs down time is very important , knowing when someone has had enough and they just need time to let their mind go. This is something huge I believe in. Allowing Arianna down time , to see family and friends, taking her shopping. This place a huge role in supporting her.
You know at times Arianna gets somewhat Manic , that is her I accept her for who she is, but there are times you have to let the manic run its course , because slamming the breaks on something could do more harm than good, so I let out a little rope and if a mistake is made I fix it, not that there has ever been something drastic.
Knowing your partner means the world , knowing when to let a little rope out does more help than bad. Being there to pick things up , insures your partner you have their back.
Male insecurities , the two words that start almost everything argument , is what’s wrong ? These two words do more damage than anything , because it is not asked just once or twice especially is the answer is nothing. Then if the answer is nothing there has to be something wrong, so that question is just hammered until something is made up. This all comes back to the down time. Sometimes we just need to vegetate , think , let our mind go and just chill.
Who are you seeing? Are you cheating? Are you talking to anyone else? This means one or two things , the Dom you are seeing is very insecure which is not a good quality when it comes to a Dominant or he is the cheater. 99% of the time the accuser is the one who is stepping out , so then you need to ask him those same questions..
A Dominant who demands your passwords to all of your accounts that is a security problem as well as an ego problem, not to mention a lack of trust.
It cracks me up when these married fuck tards who are cheating on their wife does not trust their submissive. They cant be trusted but they cant trust the other one they are with. How fucking stupid is that? Fuck Tard was a nice word by the way.
We all choose our own path , you just need to make sure you are traveling down the right path , and you need to know your partner has your back..