Archive for the Self-Discipline Category

Master And Slave Behavior modification

Posted in 24/7, Adapt, adapting, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Slave training, BDSM Structure, BDSM TPE Relationships, Behavior Modification, cock sucking, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, Dominants Protocol, FaceBook Vile Woods, Giving Head, Gorean Portocol, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Manipulation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, owning a slave, provocative, Rules, Self-Discipline, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Total Power Exchange, Total Submission, Train your slave, Training Arianna, training your slave, Training your submissive on April 25, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have covered this before , but I would like to go into a little more detail. I am not by any means an expert , nor do I have a PHD. What I do have though is almost 25 years experience in the BDSM lifestyle. I have played many different roles , the only thing I have not done and never will is be in the submissive role.
Some will argue you have to be submissive before you can be a Dominant and I find that statement to be complete hog wash. I have filled the Sadist role, I have been a Daddy Dom , A Dominant and a Master , owner of Property. Each role is very different , each role needs different care , but what they all have in common is they all require communication and honesty.

I have done years and years of research, met thousands of people in the lifestyle some good and some bad , some real and some fake. The one thing that is for sure you have to take your relationship serious. You have to know without a doubt what type of relationship you need , not want.

Behavior modification
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
For the journal, see Behavior Modification (journal).

Behavior modification is the traditional term for the use of empirically demonstrated behavior change techniques to increase or decrease the frequency of behaviors, such as altering an individual’s behaviors and reactions to stimuli through positive and negative reinforcement of adaptive behavior and/or the reduction of behavior through its extinction, punishment and/or satiation. It is similar to operant conditioning but with the absence of the antecedent. Behavior modification is now known as Applied behavior analysis (ABA) which is more analytical than it used to be..

http://www.livestrong.com/article/234171-examples-of-behavior-modification-plans/

Basics

Behavior modifications plans will vary depending on the individual and the behavior or behaviors that need to be changed. Behavior modification plans will include reinforcers, which are consequences that increase the behavior, and/or punishments, which are consequences that reduce the behavior.

Here comes a word I bring up in just about every post, can you spot it ?

Consistency

When developing any type of behavior modification plan, it is important to keep in mind the ease of use. For behavior modification plans to be effective, they must be followed with consistency . Therefore, if the plan is hard to use, the likelihood that it will be effective will decrease because there will be inconsistent follow through. Okay maybe you missed it ? consistently , Consistence.

During any training the key is consistency if you the Dom or Master are not consistent you will fail and it will be your fault.

No matter your degree of submission you are going to go through some type of behavior modification.

Okay so BDSM is not medical and we certainly not shrinks by any means , but we are not only Dominants Masters or Daddy Doms , we are giving the responsibility and have agreed to take care of someone.

Now you the Dominant if you have any plans at all , in introducing any type of Behavior modification during your training this is something you should cover during your negotiations.

Adaption is a form of Behavior Modification , submission is a form , or just in general your employer.

When you speak in terms of BDSM your life takes a 100 degree turn, the way you talk, act , walk , speak, dress and in most cases even your hair color. Speaking of sex you will go through a few changes , now the sex is on your owners terms, the way you fuck , the way you suck cock, the way you lay , and at times when your allowed to cum.
Sex is on my terms , many men think with their dick and some would crawl naked through broken glass if they thought they were going to get a blow job, that is a true sign of being weak , and weak minded.

We train to fit our needs and wants , we train to fit your needs. Training can only be successful through positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement is a reward , you have done well, you are doing good thank you for all of your effort, you will make me a good slave. I really appreciate the effort you have been putting into our relationship.

I have covered in great detail about Arianna’s training and today it is on going. It is funny when I first met Arianna I asked her, how do you see your self as a salve? Her reply was she did not know. I asked her if she had any ideas about what she wanted out of training and her answer was no.
I then explained as we grew together and we learned each other she would have questions and things she would want to try and today that statement proved me right. Arianna is always trying to come up with ways to deepen her submission. The truth is she would rather be chained 24/7 and just used for pleasure and service.

Recently ahh about 3 months ago I required Arianna to speak in thirds , Speaking in thirds is mainly a Gorean protocol , while I am not Gorean I do use many of the lifestyles protocols. Speaking in thirds is a reminder of not only who Arianna is but what her position is in out relationship. Now she never uses the words I or me, it has been replaced with she or your slave. While she had second thoughts about being able to master such a task , Arianna has perfected it.
Did it happen in a week ? Of course not , did it happen in a month ? Again no it did not , did it happen in two months ? Again it did not , did I punish her when she messed up or forgot ? The answer is no I did not punish her. You have to remember I changed her whole thought process as far as speaking and thinking before she speaks. The harder=est part was being able to change her speaking process when around family and friends, I can assure you that is or was not an easy task. Everything is done through Positive Reinforcement

Rules that are attainable not out of reach , unrealistic will break a relationship. To many rules can cause a over load and cause a mental crash. The Dom spends more time waiting on a rule to be broken then training.
Rules are a type of Behavioral modification , your taking bad habits and replacing with good habits and again the is done through positive reinforcement , security , structure, communication , and rules.

You have to determine how far and deep you want to go with your submission. You have to determine how much control you want to hand over , you want to make sure your needs are met because if they are you will have no wants.

One last thing i want to add is , if you do not live together the above is nearly impossible to achieve. The Dominant really has no control over you and you will grow tired of trying to please someone who is not there.

train

Vile

When Your Life Self Destruct’s

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, anti depression medication, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Mentor, Bipolar, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, control, Depression, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, Master, Master And Slave, Self-Discipline, slave, Submission, submissive, Vile Woods on FaceBook on December 10, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Things get crazy at times , life gets crazy , work and even family. Then at times it seems friends or co-workers want to dump their life in your lap hoping you can fix what ever is wrong.

I talk about Depression a lot , and that is because it seems to play a huge role within our lifestyle.
While it is true there are those who do not suffer from depression or anything , I do believe the numbers are pretty high.

The good news is with the right care , the proper medication , and the right partner in the lifestyle or not , things can and will flow pretty smoothly.

When things go wrong or not as planned this is when things get complicated , but there is really no need for it.
It seems when things get a little crazy the thoughts get a little crazy and here comes the confusion.

Arianna does suffer from depression and we have been pretty lucky the last 2 years or so things have continued to have a upward swing.

It is not to say things do not get a little crazy because they do, but what ever is going on is controlled and controlled very quickly.

When I first met Arianna I went to a few of her Doctor appointments hoping to speak with her. The Doctor declined which I found kinda weird but anyway it was time for me to step in.
I found Arianna a new Doctor someone who would talk to me, we changed up the medication a little and WHAM as good as new.
There is always room for improvement but if you can find stable ground you pretty much just chill.

A couple of months ago I lost a friend in the lifestyle due to depression and she was only 23. She had spent a long time being abused and I am sure she felt like she had no one to turn to.

23 Years old she had a whole life ahead of her and there is no telling what she could of accomplished in her lifetime.

You can have friends and still feel like you have no one to talk to. You can be in a room full of people and feel like there is no one to talk to.

You can become depressed in a split second and you do not know what put you in that frame of mind. You ride it out and in a day or so your back to normal.

The health issues I have talked about over the past few years is a topic that should come up when you first meet someone. I have a list in my mind a mile long and at the end of the conversation I have much to think about before I want to commit to a relationship as I did with Arianna.
Arianna was not a split second decision , entering a relationship was something I had to give a great deal of thought.

I myself get into down and out moods from time to time, I get quiet and I am just thinking and really thinking about nothing, and it does pass.
I am not on any type of medications nor do I need to be. As of right now I am in a good place and it will continue to get better.

Depression can be bad , it can be really bad and at times people take the easy way out. That is not always the answer because I am a firm believer anything can be fixed and I do mean anything….

Knowing someone is truly interested in you and not just your cock sucking skills makes a world of difference.
Knowing that someone is working towards putting you back on the right track makes a world of difference.
Someone stepping in and taking up the slack makes a world of difference.
Someone who is willing to communicate with you , makes a world of difference, someone who cares about your thoughts and needs makes a world of difference.

There are a lot of factors that come into play when your in a relationship and not just a D’s or M’s relationship. The structure , the drama , the consistency , and helping you reach your goals.
Positive reinforcement

Being depressed does not mean you are broken , it just means you need a little more support. There is nothing wrong with that.

There is only one thing you need to get straight in your life before entering a relationship , and that would be your life.
It is not fair to someone to enter a relationship and you just dump your baggage in the living room and say hey fix it..
It is not fair to dump everything on someone and expect someone else to fix something you fucked up

If your in that depression mode , you should not even being considering entering a relationship , again it is not fair. At this point and time your problems are not for someone to fix, you have to fix yourself.

Being open and upfront about your depression and the problems is causes should be brought into the conversation when meeting.
This will give the Dominant time to decide if this is a path he wishes to walk or just tell you its not for him.

Looking for a relationship is one thing but looking for someone to rescue you in much different.
The rescue Dominant and there are a lot of them out there , but those relationships are very short lived because many bite off more than they can chew.

Before entering a relationship come up with a check list, and check things off one at a time until the list is completed.

Depression if your meds are not working then maybe your due a change or even another Doctor. Because if your on the wrong medication nothing is going to help.
Most Doctors today just want to push pills instead of getting to the root of the problem.

Always have someone you can talk to a close friend we all need one of those. We all need someone we can confide it.
That is very important and will help you stay a float when times are bad.

The submissive should have a mentor in the lifestyle a female mentor.
Most Doms who want to mentor subs or slaves are just out for ass.
A female mentor is going to understand you on much more deeper levels , you will also want to share more.
A female mentor has no motive when it comes to helping you.

Medication , you can be on the right medication but if your with someone who is just toying with your mind, it will no doubt put you in a bad place.
You want to make sure the one your with has your best interest in mind. If your just being used they are not going to care what state of mind your in, once you become a liability to them , your going to get dumped anyway.

To keep things on a smooth tract and it is possible , you need to have certain things in place, again things such as structure , rules , you need daily routines , and none of these things mentioned are hard it is just finding someone who is willing to devote the time that is needed..

You can prevent any of the above if you just sit down and think things out, and talk to someone.

Life is meant to be good.

self_destruct_large

Vile

Earning Ones Submission

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, anger, Anger Issues, Bad Dominant, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, Cheating Dominant, Commit, commitment, communication, conceded, control, controlling, Daddy Dom, Depression, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominants who suffer from depression, emotional, Emotions, Fake Dominants, Health, Humiliation, Married Dominant, Master & Slave, pussy, Rules, self confidence, Self-Discipline, sex, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used, sucking cock, Total Submission, TPE, violence, you have to train yourself with tags , , , , , , , , on October 6, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

First of all I would like to apologize for yesterdays post. That post is not who or what I am. After being called out in public by someone who clearly has no clue about submission or the lifestyle just really set me off.
If it had been a private email things would of been much different and probably not even brought up.

At one time I just expected submission, if you were submissive you belonged on your knees with a full mouth. I did not want to hold you, I did not want to hear about your day, I could care less about your family or friends. In fact I did not even want you to speak unless you were cooking and wanted to know what I wanted to eat.

Those who are true slave, and submissive’s are not weak, infact those who wish to submit are very strong, and most are very intelligent, but for some reason some see it as a weakness, and some Doms prey on such.

So it took me from about the age of 14 until I reached maybe 31 to realize there was so much more out there.

The truth is when I looked at a woman , I saw three holes and nothing more. You were only good if you were on your knees, your back or ass in the air.
Aftercare was unheard of, you know fuck that. If you want aftercare hold your pillow.
That was really my train of thought. Women were put here to suck cock, cook and clean.

I remember being out in California, I was seeing this little Blonde, well okay I saw her once. As she was sucking my cock in the Mcdonalds parking lot while I was eating my big mack, I didn’t even let her finish. I pulled her up by her hair and looked at her eye to eye, and I asked, what the fuck are you doing ? I am sucking your dick. Um no your being stupid and your broken, I started the car and she asked where we were going and I said I am taking you home, then I am going to jack off.
If you wanted to hang out you were going to suck my dick, or lay on your back. That was really my train of thought.

By the time I left Korea I knew how easy it was to get in someone’s head. It was so easy to play off of someone’s emotions. Once you were able to find that emotion button, it was game on, until I grew tried of her, which was maybe a week, that was a long term relationship to me.

When I first met you within the first 5 minutes, I knew if you sucked dick, and took it up the ass, if you answered no to any of those two questions the conversation was over.

Although I was active in the community, it was really hard for me to hookup with anyone at the local events, because they all knew me, and what I was about.

My early 30’s my train of thought began to change, as I began to have more interest in submission. I wanted to know what made them tick, what made them think, and why they needed to be submissive.

Over the years I have seen a pattern, this does not include EVERYONE so please take note.

I have had the privilege of meeting a lot of slaves and submissive’s , and one thing I have noticed , while each is very unique many had something in common. Many suffered from depression , anxiety , and even bipolar while most were on medication there was a handful who were not.
Many of these women tend to trust way to easy, thus making them an easy target.
The one major thing they all have in common is they are looking for security, they are seeking a home, and someone who will provide structure and safety.
Under the right circumstances many will adapt without question.
I can assure you that you will not find a more loyal partner. All we have to do is provide the right setting.
I have said in the past the first 90 days are the hardest but that is not always the case, many will fall right into place with the proper communication.

Trust is a huge issue and many are willing to turn over their life to you, in hopes you will take care of them.

If the Dominant is truly interested in you, he will have a long list of questions.
It is up to you to answer and be as honest as you can. If the answer is no, do not be afraid to say no, do not say yes just to please.

You should never allow anyone to demand you call them Sir , Master or Daddy. The Dominant will know it will come in time, he will know he has to earn your trust, and respect.

I know twenty years ago I didn’t care what you called me as long as you were on your knees. I had the attitude a woman had three pussy’s and they were just used as a cum dump nothing more. If I wanted to see you again I would say so, but I would make it clear I was not looking for anything long term.
Hey Vile can I come and visit? Sure you can if you plan on sucking cock I could use the company, that was the attitude I had, but I never lead anyone on.
Today I am not sure why some men have that need, why they have the need to lead on. Make someone believe something that is not true.
Well I plan on leaving my wife, yea we all know that is bullshit because if he was going to leave his wife he would just do it
Trust me I am not having sex with my wife. Really ? Get the fuck out. There is pussy in his bed and it is not free so he is fucking her.
My wife said I could see other people. Okay fine let me talk to her, since she does not care.
Yea then his cock sucker shuts up, well um not today or its okay she just does not want to know.
Okay when are you leaving? Why have you not left already if she is such a bitch ?

Last, a man who has a temper, a man who has a drinking problem, a man who is cheating on his wife , a man who is abusive , mental or physical , a man who lies.

Listen to me, that man is no Dominant, that man is no Master, That man is no Daddy Dom. In fact that man is nothing at all, he is just taking up valuable oxygen others need..

If a man cannot control his own life how can he control someone else?

Someone said the other day I am an egomaniac , and that statement is so far from the truth.
I may be a little cocky at times, but in real, I am just very confident.

crying

Vile

If something is earned you have so much more respect. There is no greater gift than earning someone’s submission.

Making Love Nah , Having Sex Nah , Just Raw Fucking

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, Alt.com, Arianna, bdsm, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, Cheating Dominant, Collarme.com, communication, control, Dating, Deception, Discipline, Dominant, Drama, Emotions, Fake Dominants, fifty shades of grey, Flogger, Floggers, Honesty, Kink, kinky, Loyal, Manipulation, Married Dominant, masochist, Master, Master And Slave, Pain, Patience, punish, Punishment, pussy, Rules, Self-Discipline, sex, slave, sub-space, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Text, TPE, Vile Woods on FaceBook on April 20, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

Arianna cooking dinner I get home from work walk over bend her over and push three finger inside her pussy, slowly fucking her until she starts to breath a little heavy, then I just simply walk away going about my business.

Being able to just snap your fingers and your submissive drops to the floor without question, even better tell them to go to the bedroom and strip and spread you will be there in a minute. Crawl on top bust your nut and get off. It can be that simple.

The thing is every Dominant , every Master can have it this way.  No questions asked, never. You can lead and they will follow you where ever you go.

Being a Dominant is much more than barking our orders, going to wal mart and buying a dog collar, changing rules when no rules are being broken and you want to punish.

I saw a post on Facebook not long ago a submissive was going to meet her Dom, and he was figuring out different ways to punish her, just for the sake of punishing.

The truth is most of you who except bruises except only because you think that is part of the D’s lifestyle , then there are those who except them because you want the relationship to work, so you will take what ever. Then there are those who truly enjoy them. There are Masochist who truly enjoy pain, there are those who need pain as an escape a way to release, but for the most, many of you just except it.

I heard some time ago that pain was needed to reach sub-space and that my friends is so far from the truth. There is nothing written anyplace that says pain is need to reach sub-space.

Sub-space is mental, sub-space is the connection the two of you have with each other, sub-space depends on how far your Dominant can get into your head, sub-space depends on the intensity of play, and it does not have to do anything with pain.

Okay so lets take the words BDSM we have the kink, we have the sex, we have the control, we have the bondage, the floggers, whips, cuffs, ahh the St Andrews cross. The list goes on and on, and while it is true all of this is a huge plus it is not the foundation of the relationship.

The foundation first and for most is the communication we have, second is the control we show at home and while out. Being honest, loyal, most of all truthful. You learn to guide they will follow and follow without question….. The rest is just a bonus, and the bonus’s just keep getting better and better. The longer you are who you say you are, the more your subs or slaves wall will slowly come down.. Once those walls come down your relationship has no end, it will continue to grow.

All these fake dudes the Fifty shade dudes who do not have a clue, the married dudes who do not have a clue. Their life is so fucked up trying to juggle two lives, hiding everything hoping they don’t get caught. Or the guy who thinks he is King Dom after reading Fifty Shades now he wants to be king master and he is on the hunt. These are all short lived relationships. The married one is not going to leave his wife, more so if he’s not investing anything into the relationship.  If your his submissive and your living alone he should be paying for part of your upkeep he should be helping with the home. I am telling you this from a mans point of view, if he is married he will not leave his wife, he has way to much to lose.

Listen to this you who are seeing married Doms, you are only getting one side of the story about how bad their home life is, you are getting their story. If their life was so bad, they would have already moved out, yes just like I did, they would of already left their wife and kids behind. . He can go on and on about how bad his marriage is, how much he hates his wife, but the bottom line is he is still there and he will be there when you are gone.

Now my question is how can you sleep at night with a clear conscious? How can you sleep at night knowing what you are doing to his family, destroying what she has worked so hard to build. Because what ever a man has it is because of his woman, it is because of his wife. Just something to think about because it is not fair that she does not have the ability to share her side of it. If his marriage is so bad put your foot down, put a time limit that he has to move out, then see what happens. It is not fair to destroy something his wife has worked so hard building, and the bad thing is she does not have a clue that things are so bad, because he will not communicate with her. Now if you think your the only one he is seeing you are stupid, and I know you are thinking the same thing in the back of your head. When you go days with out a call or email, or even a fucking text.

On the other hand if you do not care, and you are that cold you don’t have any feelings then go for it. To each their own I am not judging anyone, have a little compassion.

If he will fuck around on his wife, guess what ?

Now all the trouble you girls go through someone made a comment just a little bit ago.

You are a minority Vile… and are one of the rare ones to do it right.

Okay that can be a true statement but it is really not, you have to weed yourself through all the fake ones. It is like when you open a door and it is full of horse shit, your thinking fuck there has to be a fucking horse somewhere in here. So you open a door and there is a room full of Doms you think one of them has to be real. You have to be able to think with a clear head. You have to have a plan in place before you start your search.

Fuck Collarme.com fuck ALT.com both of those are meat markets to men, and that is exactly what they think. Now are some real sure they are but very few and far between. You have to be willing not to settle for second best, and many times you get the feeling something is not right but you go right along with it. You continue to go along with it even though you feel something is wrong hoping your thoughts are wrong, and you know most of the time they are not.

If you do not live together you cannot truly know the fulfillment of living a D’s style relationship, to know what it is like waking up every morning with your Master, following his rules, his guidelines there is no way to experience it. The little you get while on the phone and it is phone sex mostly, the weekend out of a month if that, maybe a night or even just a couple of hours. You will most likely spend your Birthday alone, as with all of the holidays.

So no it is not that I am a minority , because there are plenty of me out there. It is just you the submissive or slave taking the time to weed thought the bad to get to the good. There are Dominants out there that will more than fit your needs. There are Dominants out there who will treat you with the respect you deserve, who will treat you as their princess.

For you Doms in the lifestyle for a while, just learning or the Fifty Shades, if you play your cards right, the submissive is for your taking. They want to be used and used on a regular basis, nothing brings more pleasure to a submissive to be used. Some of you guys just kill me.

Lady’s all you need is a plan.

Image

Vile

 

 

Training Your Slave And Having The Proper Keys

Posted in 24/7, abuse, Argue, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, cheating, Cheating Dominant, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, control, controlling, Daddy Dom, Dominant, Dominants, emotional, Emotions, fetlife, hoe, Lie, Lies, Master, Master & Slave, Master And Slave, Patience, rimming, Rules, Self-Discipline, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock on March 16, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have talked about Training your Slave in the past, not so much a submissive because a Submissive still has some control about what goes on. A Submissive has the RIGHT to say NO, and that word has to be honored.

Many of you have seen me, I am an average looking guy, nothing special, I don’t have that Tom Cruise thing going on, but I am me. I am me inside out. I am not someone from 8 to 5 then someone different when the clock hits 5.05pm I am me 24/7. I do not care what others think of me, I do not care if others talk about me, I do not mind being the gossip of the day or the week. Why ? Because I am me and no one can change that,

Many of you have seen Arianna she is without a doubt a Total Fucking Knock out. She was built for fucking, she is perhaps the best cock sucker I have ever cum across. She is truly a perfect sign of beauty.  Last she is a True Slave at heart, she has giving me not 25% not 50% or 75% not even 100% but 150%.

To put us side by side you would look and go what the fuck? How did Vile pull that off, I know other Dominants and Masters ask me the same thing. My answer is always the same, I pulled it off because I am just me I am Vile, I have never put up any fronts, I have never pretended to be anyone else.

My Training also includes being Vile being me and no one else. I can tell you if you can pull that off just being yourself and staying yourself you can go places.

I have fucked some of the most beautiful women in the world. I have fucked models, Doctors, Lawyers, women who were married, Ive fucked their sisters and at times I lowered my standards some not much but some. I have fucked some I knew I would never be in a relationship with. I have fucked those and threw them taxi money while pushing them out the door, and they still call me the next day.

Okay Ive made some mistakes, Ive used some, Ive hurt some, but then you grow the fuck up. I can tell you and maybe some of you men can relate it does not matter how many women you fuck, it still gets lonely waking up alone in the am.

Then you have to stop and ask yourself what am I doing wrong ? Pussy is not in shortage. You can go out to a nigh club pick someone up within an hour bring them home bust a nut and send them on their way, you feel good, but we never stop to think about their feelings. We never stop and think what we are doing to them mentally and emotionally. Okay on the other side some women are Hoes as well, some women use men.

I am not off track I am getting to the training part. I am just sharing a little about my past, while I had fun, I had fun being alone. That was one thing I was not able to see until my late 20’s early 30’s.

When someone ask me hey how are ya doing? My answer is always the same. I am Living The Dream, my dream, viles dream. I am living in the present, I am living in the today, not yesterday or tomorrow, but the present. The past is just that it is the past. Nothing I do is going to change that. The future I do not have a clue, all I know is for right now I am living the dream.

I recently took part in a training seminar in sales, and the Motivational speaker is just fucking unreal and it works, it works to a T. The thing is you can do what he says and speaks about, but you have to throw in your own personality, you have to be you, and no one else.

The way I trained Arianna worked for me, the way I trained my last long term was far different, and chong the training was way out the door. I was more cold, more self centered , I was more stand offish , but that is the type of master she needed, but at the same time I was me. The only thing I changed was my training process.

Rules every submissive, Baby Girl or Slave needs rules, they all need to know there are consequences as well. Rules with no consequences are no more than words. You know what words get old, promises get old, lying gets old, cheating gets old, losing your temper gets old, being abusive gets old. Then when it does not work out you can blame it on the Bitch, she was the one who was fucked up, she was a total fake. The fact is that is a lie, because if you had been yourself, chances are it would of worked out.

Now the almighty question. How long does it take to train a slave ? Well how long does it take to make something a habit. Note you are not just making one thing a habit, you are changing someones life around to fit your needs and wants.

The key is but there are a couple of keys to many locks. The main key is being yourself, another key is have self control, another key is not having any anger issues. If you have anger issues you have no business being in the lifestyle , and you should be ashamed demanding someone call you Master or Daddy or even Sir. Those terms are earned. If you have anger issues, and I have met several who could not control their temper, and wondered why their relationships failed, yes that was plural.  Another Key is having no Drama, drama kills you. Your Submissive , baby girl, or slave does not want to be part of a mess you created, and to get them in your fucked up shit is not fair. Another Key being truthful , just tell the truth, even if its going to piss someone off. . Another key is being in control, and not controlling, this falls under anger issues again. The thing is to properly train someone you have to have every key I just mentioned, and there are a few more. The key to respect, the key to understand the word no.  These keys get Heavy but in your relationship you have to use each key and use on a daily basis, if you start leaving keys out, you will slowly start to lose control. Once you have lost control you can rarely regain. Ive been there done that, once its over its over.

When I met Arianna her life was in a total mess, and even after she explained to me what kind of Dominant she needed I still had some hesitation. So I had to spend sometime thinking, was this something I wanted to take on. Did I want to micromanage someone, did I want that much responsibility , did I want that much control over someone’s life. Well I am happy to say going on almost two years well six months short of two years my math is probably different than yours but that’s OK. It is working and working well. Arianna can tell you I use all of the keys on a daily basis. When she gets upset I am there for her, when she gets emotional I am there for her. The key is I am there no matter what, see we just found another key.

My way of training may not fit your way, it may not fit your baby girls way, submissive or slaves way, but if you take bits and pieces and use some of what I am saying and be yourself it can work.

My thought of a Triad was not for me it was for Arianna, fuck I get anything and everything I want, when I want and how I want it, without any resistance. I get waited on hand and foot, sex is when ever I want, I get my cock sucked more than Bill Clinton, I get my ass licked when I want, my feet. I want for nothing. Another key is, I have to give back and more. I give back more than I take. I am there 24/7 no questions asked. If Arianna needs me I drop what ever I am doing. She knows this as well.

Now to you married dudes who have the need to fuck around because your wife wont lick your ass, or the dudes who prey on those who are submissive just so you can use. You do not have any KEYS. All you have is the gift of Gab, and that only last so long, she will leave you and yes you will blame her. Or if you do have any keys it will not unlock any doors, they are useless, until you decide to man up. When you go in the bathroom turn on the water look in the mirror and wash all of the pussy off of your face, your keys will never work.

I read a Doms profile on Fetlife not long ago, he stated he could train any Slave in less than 30 days. That is a complete joke and he is truly living in a fantasy world, or maybe he can make someone think he can, but again he does not have all the keys.

The fact is the training never stops, the training is never complete, training is something that has to be done daily, and that falls under consistency daily consistency, and being who you are.

You are changing someones whole thought process, you are changing their way of thinking, and I will give you a good example.

While meeting with another Dominant he was quizzing me on how I trained and was able to maintain such a relationship. With Arianna sitting right there and as I was explaining she really heard nothing, even when I mentioned the part about mind modification, and I have mentioned it before in front of her, and she hears nothing. That is how I can tell Ive done well, that is how I know my training was and is successful. I can speak of training her in front of someone and she hears nothing, even if she does it goes in one ear and out the other. She cannot see it because she lives it everyday and I continue the training daily.

If your training starts out with learning to suck cock, then your fucked up. Why don’t you suck someones cock and see what you get out of it. See what benefits you get from sucking cock. Then you can explain to the submissive what the benefits are to learning to suck cock.

If you use all of your keys and you are truthful during the process you to can have anything and everything you want. I want for nothing, I ask for nothing, and I truly mean that because everything I need is anticipated . When we are going out all I have to do is tell Arianna to get in the car, if I tell her where we are going fine if I do not that is fine.

Train your own way just make sure you have the proper Keys.

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Vile

Arianna And I watched, My Five Wives, Well Almost All Of It

Posted in abuse, Argue, Arianna, bdsm, Buddhism, Christians, church, communication, Consensual, consequences, consistent, control, controlling, Discipline, Domestic Discipline, Dominant, Family Values, Gay, Living Poly, Living Triad, married, Married Polygamist, Master, My Five Wives, Open Minded, Patience, Polygamist, Protocol, relationships, Religion, Rules, Self-Discipline, sharing, Sister Slaves, Sister Wives, Structure, Submission, submissive, Triad on March 16, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

My Five Wives

While skipping through channels the other day I stumbled across this show called, My Five Wives

Brady who is married to five wives in Utah and has 24 children lives in two houses built side by side and a food bill of over 4.000 dollars a month seems to have it down for the most part.

The family were all Mormons at one time but have split off from the traditional Mormon religion and kinda added their own flavor.  While the family follows no real religion they all believe in Buddhism, all the women are pro-gay marriage and they all have a drink from time to time.

Each wife has their own bedroom and Brady takes turns spending the night with each one. One Birthdays each wife gets an extra night.

I have nothing against those who believe in polygamy or who live it, if it works for them then so be it.

If a family can live the Polygamy lifestyle and make it work, and not live off of government assistance then leave them be. We are in a new time where we allow gay couples to marry so why would be draw a line on how many people can live together.

While the family is not religious based they were all Mormons at one time, and they do live in a  Polygamist community , which they have been asked to leave because of the way they believe.

There are a few things that caught my eye in the short time we watched the show. The main thing was the jealousy between all of the wives as Brady took turns spending the night with each one. The second was no structure within the home, third there were no rules that had to be followed. Even though the show is not geared towards any BDSM lifestyle or Domestic Discipline the family did lack the fundamentals of any type of real structure and no protocol. I do believe Brady tries to communicate the best he can, but the main factor that keeps everything from working is the jealousy. There is no real communication with the wives, they all work toward the building of the home, but there is clearly no team work. They do have family outings which is good, yes all thirty of them, wow can you imagine going to McDonalds and having a bill for thirty.

So I wonder if others who live as Polygamist have the same issues , the same problems , if they have the same jealousy issues going on.

None of the wives on the show are Bi Sexual and that should never come into play anyway if you are looking to expand your family. I do not see the need in having partners and seeking out those who are bi as a need and that should never be part of the reason you are wanting to expand your family.

While I have done research on Domestic Discipline family’s I have not run into any who live as Polygamist. I have run into family’s who suffered from abuse and while a couple disagreed with me they mentioned all of the arguing that went on daily, and the fighting that went on daily so I was not able to connect them with living a Domestic Discipline lifestyle which for the most is religious based as well.

In the short time watching the show I was able to pin point where the problems came from. First there was no Alpha female, if there was she was not willing to step up to the plate. I can see where they all were wanting to be treated equal but in a live in situation like that I see no way that would work.

There was zero structure everyone did their own thing, having no structure causes arguing. There were no house rules again having no rules causes arguing.  Last but not least there were no consequences for any actions. Although he did try and communicate with everyone it was clear he was not getting through to them.

I can see where such a lifestyle could work if the male is in full control, and I can also see where it can fail. Those who live the polygamy lifestyle keep it such a secret I do not believe there is any hard statistics that shows if it works more than it fails.

I also believe a man can stretch his self way to thin and not being able to maintain any type of control, and it is clear when one of the wives stood toe to toe and argued with him he clearly had no control.

When Arianna and I were talking about the possibility of adding another, there would of been a plan in place. There would of been house rules to follow, there has to be structure, there has to be protocols , and most of all there has to be an alpha female, and the other has to know the alpha is just that and will always be the alpha. So a third would have to be okay being the third, and know that will never change.

I was reading some of the comments about the TV show My Five Wives, and there was not one good one, well until I commented. These people who were complaining are the same ones you see as customers in the TV show Hardcore Pawn, or guest on the Jerry Springer show, These are the ones talking about how others live their lives.

You have people protesting Gay Marriage if your so against it then don’t marry someone who is gay, BOOM problem solved. If you judge someone for having more than one wife, then just marry one, problem solved.

What is really stupid is you spend and hour watching a TV show about Polygamist then you spend the next day complaining about it. Wow fucking really. Truth be known your the fucking moron for wasting an hour of your life watching something you hate so much.

Let people be who they want and need to be. A friend at work was talking about a family he was working with they were Mexican, he was saying that two family’s lived in a two bedroom apartment, and how crazy they were. Well it is not really crazy, they make it work, who cares how they live.

If your going to live, live the dream, but don’t waste your time talking about how others live, when your own backyard is fucked up….

By the way I can talk, my backyard is clean.

Image Just how many is to many? How many can you keep under your control.

Vile

30 Days Of Submission

Posted in 24/7, 30 Days Of Submission, abuse, Adapt, anticipation, Arianna, bdsm, Be who you are, communication, Dominance, Dominants, Master, Meeting a new Dominant, Patience, Protocol, relationships, Respect, Rules, Self-Discipline, skirt no panties, slave, Submission, submissive on January 18, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

This is where you write your own book. Your 30 days of submission. This should be giving a great deal of thought before you even enter your relationship.

How do you see yourself as a submissive? How do you see yourself living as a submissive ? How deep do you want to submit ? Do you just want to submit in the bedroom only ? Do you want to submit outside of the bedroom ? Do you want 24/7 submission ?

If is up to you for the most part keeping yourself in that submissive mode. What rituals would you like to implement on a daily basis, rules for yourself to keep you in check. What protocols do you want to put into place ?

Remember once you enter a relationship and you have a plan, you this submissive will have to adapt to the Dominants way, his surroundings, his needs and wants. You are there to follow.

At times you do not feel submissive and staying in that frame of mind is not always an easy task, so putting a game plan into action can make all the difference in the world. You in a way can put your life as you see it into place.

Once you enter a relationship or lets say your in the process of entering a relationship you should go over everything with your potential Dominant. How you see yourself in a relationship, and what it is you want out of the relationship. Remember everything you do effects not only your Dominant but you as well. You have to get just as much out of the relationship as your new Dominant.

Most how ever do not think about the 30 days of submission until they have already entered the relationship. Sometimes that works but for the most it does not and if it does it turns out to be a one way street, and this is not fair to you the submissive. If you just give and give and get nothing in return, what do you really gain?

Your 30 days of submission should never have to stop at just 30 days. You go 30 , 60 , 90 , 120. It is a never ending story, it is your story, it is your life.

If you choose to only submit in the bedroom, why would you try to connect with someone who wants a 24/7 ? If you want a 24/7 why would you try to connect to someone who only wants the bedroom.

This is where your 30 days of submission begins. You have a clear plan and you stick to that plan. Share your thoughts, and get answers for everything.

The world of submission and Dominance can be a very beautiful thing. The ability to be as open as you want, the open communication like you have never had before. The Bond you have never felt. Yes all of this is in your hands. You control the level of submission.

No one can tell you that you are submissive, more so do not let anyone twist your thoughts around telling you that your more of a submissive. Maybe your told you are a slave, when in fact your not , but you will go along with what ever because you feel this is the right Dominant. Never allow yourself to be pushed into a corner, and if you are speak your mind.

This is probably one of the most important things you need to learn. If you are asked a DIRECT question you need to give a DIRECT answer. You need to give a truthful answer, you need to share your feelings. If you are not allowed to speak your mind, or share your thoughts and feelings, then you have the wrong Dominant.

Maybe instead of 30 days of Submission, you should think about doing 30 days of Interviewing , while your sharing your 30 days of submission. Because until you commit to such a relationship you are the one who says yes I can or no I cannot. It does not matter what is said prior to entering a relationship. You should be able to speak your mind.

Another good thing to do is write, not on a daily basis, or hourly but when you feel like it. This book should be yours and only yours. This is your private get away place, your own little world.

The book would be called The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly . Picture a piece of paper with three lines going down. one is the good, one is the Bad, and last the Ugly. This will help you see things more clearly, and it just may help you understand your own little world. If your filling up the two last then something is wrong, and then and only then should you start to question yourself. Then and only then should you share your concerns. After all you are submissive, you are not a Slave.

The difference between the two is a huge difference. You as the submissive has the right to speak up when things are not going as planned. You have the right to say hey wait a minute we did not agree to this. You do have that right, just as you have the right to open and honest communication.

You the submissive before entering a relationship should already have a list of rules in your mind that you would like to follow. What is going to help you thrive? What rules are going to benefit you you as a submissive ? What rules are going to help you in daily life ? Share these ideas with your new Dominant.

Protocols , when that word comes up most people just shrug their shoulders. Why do I need protocols ? Protocols are stupid. Well Protocols help keep you in that mindset , they help with your submission. Depending on the protocols you have depends on your state of submission. These are some of the things that should be in your plan when meeting someone new.

Listen to me , because when you first meet someone and you already have your plan in place. The new Dominant will know you are not a push over. He will know you know what your talking about, and your not going to be an easy target.

When asking questions make direct contact with his eyes, and make sure you get direct contact with yours. If his eyes are drifting or looking around, that is not a good sign.

Now most will say before you meet, there will be no eye contact, you will address me as Sir. Wear a skirt with no panties, high heels. Again this is not the case because you do not know if this Dominant is for you. Addressing someone as Sir is earned, it is not giving.

The Good, The Bad , and The Ugly your own book, write it and stick to it. Do not I repeat do not use an eraser. Once you have your thoughts and ideas down stick to it.

I can assure you if you stick to your plan things will work out to your advantage. It may not work out in the time line you want, but it will work. Having a plan before hand will make a huge difference. White writing your book before entering a relationship you can make changes, because as you are writing you will grow inside, you will grow daily, weekly and monthly. It is okay to make changes, but before entering a relationship have your book finished. Most of all make sure your new partner is willing to follow your ideas as well as you follow his. The two of you need to work together.

I am not speaking about a Slave although a Slave should have a game plan as well in the type of Master they are seeking, but a Slave is looking for total submission. A Slave wants a master to take full control, so please do not confuse the two.

If you think for a minute you may be a Slave you need to do some hard soul searching because once you cross that line it is real hard to walk backwards.

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Vile