Archive for the Thekinkyworldofvile Category

I am Alive And Well

Posted in Arianna, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Relationships, slave, Submission, submissive, Thekinkyworldofvile with tags , , , , , on August 8, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

Work has been crazy , life is good, Arianna has a Birthday coming up on the 27th, the big 39.

I have been working on several blog which lay in the not finished folder.

I just wanted to say I really appreciate everyone who stops by. The coolest thing when looking at the stats is how many different country’s from around the world stop by..

Arianna and I attended a MAsT meeting last night , and there was an awesome turn out of people.

The topic was Topping from the Bottom, and I think that will be a post down the road very soon….

I am still waiting to see if I get the Approval about starting a MAsT chapter it has been almost 3 months since I submitted my application but at Last nights MAsT I heard encouraging words.

I am moving in a different direction with the Kinky World Of Vile and I am sure you all will see the difference, I think we are in need of more kink….

Much Love

BDSM With No Emotion

Posted in 24/7, Acceptance, anal sex, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, choices and consequences, codependency, commitment, communication, compatibility, CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENT, fifty shades of grey, https://ncsfreedom.org/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, https://www.facebook.com/vile62, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, NCSF, owned property, Owned Slave, sadist, SADOMASOCHISM, sane and consensual, sex slave, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Submission, TPE, Training Arianna, viledesires62@aol.com on July 12, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I love comments , I love what others have to say, I love hearing their point of view, I love it when others share feeling and their thoughts. How ever if you are just going to Bash me your comment will be deleted. I am far from a professional writer and most of my post are done in 10 or 15 time slots in the early am of the hours.
Enough about that , from time to time I will get a comment or a question from a younger Dominant who is up and coming , while it is true we all have to start somewhere , that starting point is the beginning of a new foundation in our life…..

The early steps we take will be our paths for many years and we do not get the opportunity to change it that often , and if we do it really takes a lot of work, mainly because you pretty much have to reconstruct your whole thought process. Wow that is pretty deep coming from me.

Maybe sometimes we get caught up in life and screwed over enough we lose our emotions, we lose feelings or the ability to have feelings towards someone in a relationship. Maybe trust comes into play , maybe your not capable of feeling any longer, maybe your not able to trust.

No emotions no feelings when entering a relationship is not fair to someone who attempting to build a lasting relationship. This is where communication comes in and sharing your point of view, maybe leaving no hope of building something or maybe there may be light at the end of the tunnel.

Arianna and I met a Master some time ago who was or is looking for a consensual , non consensual relationship. We met up for lunch one day and he literally drilled us for a couple of hours wanting to know about the foundation of our relationship and what we did to make it work.

One thing I found odd is he would not really share much of his thoughts on how he saw his relationship , mainly because I think it was really dark and maybe I am better off not knowing. I would not of judged or thought his way was wrong , maybe I would of even tried to understand.

There are so many different levels of submission , and the same for those who are Dominants or Masters, from mild and no control , to the most , unthinkable acts one could think of.

I know from experience being a sadist at one time , very few sadist are capable of developing any feelings or emotions. While I liked I did not want to feel , because if I felt I would not of wanted to inflict pain and at that time inflicting pain was a need.

To date I am living the dream, it may seem like I brag a lot but it is really not bragging. I want to show others in the lifestyle your relationship can be the same if not better.

A Question that came up on the topic of Sex and submission was …

Again I’m pretty new to the scene so sorry if this is rude, but I thought in TPE the decisions were up to the Dom. Why would a third need to win over Arianna, doesn’t she consider your word final?

This is an awesome question and and yes in my home I have the final say the final word case closed. Looking deeper though if you have never known or felt love just ask me how deep my love for Arianna is. My last thought and night and my first breath when my eyes open.
Arianna is my responsibility and she not only needs me to make the decisions she trust me enough to know I will. What ever I decide effects both of us, and the outcome of any decision I make could make or break.

Talks of a Triad is still on going , and we are still giving it great consideration but it would really have to be someone special. You have to be careful when you bring someone into your home, because what you have built could come tumbling down out of control and no way to fix it.
While I could just bring someone else in and say to Arianna this is our new slave take it or leave it. While Arianna is my slave she does have the right to leave at anytime. This falls under the consensual side of things, and our relationship is 100% consensual….

Question….

1. Does there have to be an emotional component to a Master / Slave relationship? I’m very turned on by the idea of owning a woman and using her sexually as I like. However, I don’t feel like I could love such a woman, and I’d prefer she not love me either. The few women I’ve loved in my life were pretty amazing as-is and needed no correction from me, I’d have gained no pleasure from disciplining them. The desire to train a slave and punish her for disobeying is a purely sexual one. Is that unheard of in the BDSM world? Are there subs who get off sexually on subbing without expecting a dom to take care of their emotional needs, and who don’t expect him to be all sweet and romantic?

So your thinking a consensual non-consensual relationship which would be made during the negotiation process. Both agree or the slave would agree you can do anything to me without question or without future negotiation. That truly takes a lot of trust.

The answer is yes there are those out there dominant and submissive who are seeking relationships where there would be no feelings involved at all, purely sexual.
Here is where the problem lays, most but not all who are submissive to have a codependency problem to a certain extent, some more than others, then you speak about a slave. A slave requires a great deal of care, not only physically but mentally . While it is possible to have the type of relationship your looking for, you would have to do it without any type of connection between the two of you, there would not be a bond, nor would the slave truly be able to trust, she could trust enough to play but not trust enough to fully let go.
Training takes a lot of time and dedication , if you do not live together training is nearly impossible because you really have no control. You as the Master have to set down and define who and what you are, you have to know what you need and what you need out of your slave. Being upfront about your intentions, being open about your thoughts…

3. I am really, really turned off by the idea that the sub is really in control of everything, and that this all secretly for her benefit. That the dom’s job is to orchestrate every sexual encounter to be totally mind-blowing for her like he’s choreographing a Broadway show. No thanks. I want a woman who genuinely wants to be my property, a toy I use how I want, when I want (within her limits, obviously). So many submissives claim that the pride they feel in pleasing their master is all the pleasure they need, but then go on to talk about lovely spankings and reassuring hands. Really? Is he your master or your slave? Does he rub your feet too? 😀
Meanwhile I read some of your slave’s blog and, wow. You have her trained so damn well. That post where you face-fucked her til she puked and then you made her clean it up was the hottest, rawest thing I’ve read in so long. You are the first dom I’ve encountered who trained a sex slave that actually does what men want. None of that dainty Fifty Shades stuff, riding crops and silk blindfolds. How did you do it? I mean was she always into throat-fucking and painal or did you push her there? If you did it, you should write a book, man; you will make a million dollars. If you didn’t, where did you find her?!?

You know you speak of your turned off by the idea that a submissive is in control , and in most cases this is true. The Dominant will want something but will cave in under pressure. So the Dominant is in fact in control until the submissive Barks and the dom backs down. So in this type of relationship who is really the Dominant?

What your seeking can be found it will just require a lot of time and patience on your part and sticking to what you need in a relationship. Many who live the lifestyle are not truly 24/7 even though they come off as being , some even say you cannot live 24/7 and that is a crock because I do.
I control everything from the time we get up until we go to bed. Many claim they do not want that kind of responsibility but it is really easy to put a plan into place.

Yes Fifty Shades was a let down I did take Arianna to see it but instead of BDSM it was a love story about a Dominant who suffered from childhood problems and depression. There was no structure , no rules or any reason to why he wanted to do the things he wanted to do….

So how did I do it you ask? Well as I said above I had to define who and what I was. I had to have a clear picture as to what type of relationship I wanted. I have had relationships in the past and for the most all were good and we parted on good terms, but I was still looking for that definition.

The rules , structure and protocols you had for you last slave will not work for someone new, mainly because people are different, needs are different and we grow , we grow on a daily basis.

Once you start your training you have to stick with it, once you explain how the relationship will work and what you expect you have to stick to it. Once you change or give in you have lost control.

While sitting here I started thinking Arianna and I have what you would call a consensual non-consensual relationship. Our relationship was negotiated before we agreed to actually enter a M’s relationship. As I stated before when entering a relationship I would bend when it came to my needs but in the end I was not in a fulfilling relationship. My needs were not being met and I was not able to be who I was.

Many in the BDSM world view consensual non -consent bad many see it as an open door to abuse , and the term is mainly geared towards owners of property.
I suppose there are those who take the term to the extreme , but if you truly care about your slave or property surely you would not bring and physical or mental harm to them.

The basis of consensual non-consent is: “I consent for You to do whatever You like to me without future negotiation”. There is just the first consent. Yes, I consent to whatever is going to happen, without needing to further negotiate what is going to happen. Obviously, strong trust is involved.

There are many reasons why consensual non-consent is a common way for BDSM partners to play. It is a strong reinforcement of the power exchange, and it supports mystery, spontaneity and excitement from the unknown. Many people argue that SSC (safe, sane and consensual) takes away the ultimate BDSM experiences in exchange for relatively safe exploration.

While you can have a relationship without caring , or not having any emotions , that would also bring no connection and a lack of trust on the slaves part , not that it cannot be done. If you were to find such a partner the relationship would be based off of just lust and we all know those are short lived. In the end you put a lot of time into a relationship and when it ends you have nothing to show for it.

It may not seem like much when your 20 , or 30 maybe even not 40 , but there will come a time when you are going to need more , and your needs will out weigh your wants. Once you hit 30 time does fly….

dirt

vileschair
Our New Toy

Vile

Our Total Power Exchange

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, adapting, Argue, Arianna, Baby Girl, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Munch, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Slave training, BDSM Structure, commitment, communication, compatibility, consequences, control, Daddy Dom, Discipline, Dominant, Dominants Protocol, MAST, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Masters And Slaves Together, molding your slave, munchs, owned property, Owned Slave, Protocol public, Protocols, slave, Submission, submissive, sucking cock, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Submission, TPE, training your slave, Training your submissive on June 3, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I searched for some two years for what I will call the perfect partner. I was extremely tired of settling for less when I knew a relationship was not going to work. Maybe I did it because of the companionship , a steady piece of ass , or maybe because I love a challenge I was hoping to take something impossible and make it work.

Here is where it gets somewhat tricky. As long as I can remember I have viewed women as objects , toys , here for service and pleasure. There is also another side to that statement. If you were not submissive Id id not try to push my beliefs on you nor would I try and change you.
I gave those the up most respect. Today I have females who are friends who are not in the lifestyle and I do not discuss the lifestyle in anyway. There are those who I have bent over backwards to help who are not in the lifestyle. So the above statement does not pertain to everyone.

I may not know everything and I have never claimed to know everything but I do know if you do not have a plan , if you do not have some kind of idea when it comes to the type of relationship you want, or the type of Baby Girl , submissive or slave it will never work. These are the people who settle for less. These are the Dominants who try to change someone into someone they are not and it never works. So he ends up exerting all of this energy and time to only find it has been wasted and the slave takes the blame.

Those who are new to the lifestyle are easy targets , they have this huge target on their shirt that says , Hi I am new and I am Gullible.

Although I have had 3 or 4 long term relationships , it was not until many years down the road that I realized I had not defined who or what I was.
Defining myself was a huge piece of the puzzle and without that piece I could never complete the puzzle.

While standing on the side of a canal one night thinking , Animel and I had just left a Chinese Buffet , where I met a woman who knew me but I did not know her and she was scared to death of me, I blogged about this before.

While thinking it hit me like an asteroid , WOW you stupid mother fucker you have had the last few pieces of the puzzle all along you just were not ready to complete it or maybe I was not ready.

I was more concerned about the next piece of ass , the next blow job , or who I could inflict pain on. I was a sadist for many years but I was not a Dominant. Mainly because I did not want that kind of responsibility , nor did I care , or maybe I did not have a clue.

So lets look at the three Basic types of Dominants , first is the Daddy Dom , I know of one I can say I respect and I believe their relationship is steadily evolving , into something more, John Brownstone. Most Daddy Doms are married and cheating. Most daddy Doms are not active in the local community due to the fact of being married, most do not impose rules or structure again because of the responsibility….

This is from a profile on Fetlife………. FInally I seek discreetion as I am married to a ultra-vanilla wife who has zero interest in the lifestyle and hope to eventually find my sub who knows she will be treasured.

Just how fucked up is this? His wife has no clue and as far as she knows everything is fine, and I am sure if she read his profile she would run. So my question is , why not just leave ? The remark She will be Treasured is a total lie because he will not be able to dedicate this time needed. Because when he is needed he will not be able to be there for her.

The Dominant who is Dominant but he is not in complete charge nor is he in control 100% of the time because his submissive has the right to say no even when it comes to following rules. The Dominant is only in charge when the submissive allows him to be in charge. The submissive will only follow rules when it is convenient or they are feeling submissive.

Those who do not live together do not have a clear understand of how a power exchange relationship works. This is because the Dominant clearly has no control over the relationship nor is the submissive able to submit on a regular basis. Training cannot be done and this is because Training has to be daily and consistent. It is not like a book where you read a few chapters , put it down and pick back up a week later.

Total Power Exchange..

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Total power exchange)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which “love” is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.
The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Outside the BDSM community, the relationship of Master/slave is sometimes regarded as a form of consensual sexual slavery. In BDSM, a slave is a specific type of submissive. The Master/slave relationship refers to the relationship between the individuals involved, and does not necessarily require any specific acts, sexual or otherwise, though sexual activity is usually an aspect of the relationship. The sexual aspect could be conventional, and not necessarily BDSM. A slave could also be a masochist or bottom, but this is not always the case.[2]

Some participants regard the relationship as sexual roleplay, while others enter into the relationship on the basis of a highly committed, long-term, submissive lifestyle.

Some practitioners feel the difference between submissive and slave is the degree of submission. However, many who are involved in Master/slave relationships see the difference as being conceptual. For example, some slaves may not have a naturally submissive personality, but choose to surrender their will and volition to another.

Slave Training

Slave training is a BDSM activity usually involving a consensual power exchange between two people taking on the roles of a Master or Mistress and a slave. The objective is to change the slave’s behavior in a manner that is pleasing to the Master or Mistress, for example to train the slave to follow a set of rules or commands that the Master or Mistress has provided.

Slave training can be a learning process both for the slave (or submissive) and for the Master or Mistress (or Dominant). Training is usually defined in clear steps or lesson plans before it begins. The Master or Mistress teaches the slave how to speak, act and think in a way that is pleasing the Master or Mistress. The slave, in return, derives pleasure from being able to please and serve the Master or Mistress. The slave may also be rewarded tangibly, such as with food, a bed, etc

Training is something I have believed in for sometime , and although in previous relationships there was training , it was nothing compared to the training Arianna went through. Maybe one reason is I was not really ready to settle down, or maybe I had never found the one.
To change ones behavior , the way someone talks, dresses , speaks as well as to others. Hair color, nail polish really everything. I mold to fit my needs. I mold to benefit the slave , my slave.
Every rule I have in place is to benefit Arianna not me, after all the relationship is to insure she is taken care of. I however do come first that includes eating.

I would suspect many relationships fail because there is not a clear understanding prior to entering a relationship. This is due to both trying to be politically correct in fear of not being accepted , or rejected. If both are not upfront about their needs in fear of losing a potential will still end in a total disaster.

A Kinkster is just Kinky , A submissive submits because it is a need but submits on their terms. A slave you needs a TPE relationship Total Power Exchange gives herself or himself because it is a need.
The TPE does not make one weak as most think , Arianna has a degree and has had the same employer for almost 16 years.

What people do not understand is everyone is different , everyone has different needs. Every Dominant , Daddy and Master are different but many times people are to quick to judge and tell others how they are doing it wrong.
The people telling others who are wrong are the ones who are fucked up. There is no BDSM bible and while there is a lot of literature on this subject you are reading someones opinion , just like what I write is my opinion.

Our TPE Total Power Exchange was worked out prior to entering a relationship , it was not something I was interested in but I felt we had enough in common to move forward and give it a try.

I control everything in our home , to include what Arianna wears , hair color , bed time and what time to wake, what she eats. Most of the time I leave cooking up to her but at times I tell her what I want to eat. While I am in full control of the finances I do let Arianna take care of that end, but I know where every penny is spent.

The relationship started out as consensual and today it is still consensual , through our communication and being open with each other , I am proud to say it has been almost 3 years and to date we still have not had an argument. I have not raised my voice nor have I called her any names out of anger.

I have a firm rule I follow , I never lose my temper towards the one who gets on their knees or lays on their back and takes what I have to give.

We are going through changes and our relationship is still continuing to grow, now Arianna is always looking for more ways to submit. As we grow and talk she still wants to dig deeper into her submission.
I will admit she does keep me on my toes and keeps me thinking. My question or thoughts are how deep can one go ? Is there an end or does one continue to travel deeper ?
Ia m going to implement more protocols that will be a reminder of who she is. Just as speaking in thirds which she has mastered , that is a reminder and today she does not even think about the way she is talking and is able to change once out in public.

Putting protocols in place provides structure, structure provides a stable relationship , and then comes communication.
I can say without a Doubt and in Honesty I run my house. I am head cheese , Head Honcho , the king and Emperor. That is something i had to earn it was not giving nor was it demanded , it was earned.

respect

Vile

As Promised

Posted in 500.000 views, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, bdsm, slave, slut, Submission, submissive, The World Of BDSM, Thekinkyworldofvile, Vile Radio, wordpress, Wordpress Awards on April 26, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

I approached someone who has a Internet radio show and I have been invited to skype with the owner this week. I just hope they do not find me to offensive. well maybe not offensive maybe to open minded. The show would really consist of what I have on my blog and then some.
I had planned a venture on my own but with our move the new job which is not new now and everything else I have just not found the time.

I have also been tossing the idea of starting a new MAsT group here in Orlando. Masters And Slaves together , it is just a matter of filing the paper work , and getting approved which I do not for see a problem.

All in all life is good things are running very smooth right now just the way I prefer it.

Arianna and I have been to several Local functions and it just seems we do not really fit in with the local crowd. It makes you wonder how so many people are in the lifestyle but you have nothing in common.

I have been blogging for a little over 3 years I do believe it is. Although my blog may seem pretty repetitive I have a different message each time. I suppose there are somethings worth repeating.

What I share is not what many share , I actually give you a peek into my life as well as Arianna’s . I seldom bring up our sexual activity between the two of us and that is mainly out of respect.

Over the past ten years I have gone through a huge transformation , some in my eyes good and some not.

I am a huge advocate when it comes to abuse.. Be it mental , verbal , or physical. Other forms of abuse is lying and not doing what you say your going to do as Dominant.

I despise married men who go behind their wives back and cheat, those so called men who are not men and they are not Dominants , they are cowards with the name pussy on their forehead. You better believe if someone was fucking their wife they would come un fucking glued. The subs who are with them are just as worthless , I suppose it sucks having to scrape the bottom of the slim barrel to get laid.

Anyway this is a HUGE deal to me and I am sure many others have hit this mile stone. WordPress usually gives out awards but since I am on their shit list I did not get a badge from them. It is all good I love being the talk of the break room…

Drum Roll please and survey says..

249 Visitors 456 Views
Best ever
1,757 views
All time
501,386 Views
Yup 500.000 people have looked at The kinky World Of Vile

Fucking Wow what a rush.

500-000

hate

Vile

We Are Still Moving Forward

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, bdsm, Christians, church, FaceBook Vile Woods, Living Poly, Living Triad, Master And Slave, Rules, slave, Submission, submissive, The World Of BDSM, Thekinkyworldofvile, Vile, Vile Radio, Vile Woods on FaceBook with tags , , , , , , , on September 27, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

The last two months have been seriously crazy. While my career as a car salesman are blowing in the wind, the 60 and 65 hours a week, and still running our home, and yes much needed Blogging time, ahhh yes my down time, my home away from home.

As I sit on the couch, and I think about how I rolled up a piece of paper like a Dildo and handed it back to the public relations manager and told her it looked like it would fit, I laugh inside, what a fucking relief.

Working as a car salesman if you are not in the little click, it can be very difficult. You can be good at a job, but you can be prevented from being good if you do not fit in.

I never ate lunch with the boys, I never joked around with them.
While standing outside hearing the men moan and bitch about how bad their life was at home. There is nothing worse than a whining man, you is acting like a little bitch. It is really , really sad when a man cannot run his own home. More than half were fucking around on their wife including the general manager.
You know if your going to stoop so low to fuck around, at least fuck around with someone better than what you have.

I am very vocal in my beliefs. It is funny because I will say something to someone and Arianna’s eyes get huge, like no he did not just say that.

Anyway I brought up a subject a couple of months ago, about Vile Radio, and yes it is still coming, like I stated things have just been wacky. There has not been anything I have not been able to handle, I strive better, when I am pushed.

There were times I became somewhat stressed but I really have no signs of being stressed, I just get kinda quite.
I am also one to believe everything will always work out, and so far in my lifetime it has, maybe not exactly the way I wanted but it does.

Someone made a comment here not log ago, that rules are made to be broken. Well no they are not, even I have rules I have to follow in everyday life. I have mentioned a thousand times if you go through life and you do what your suppose to by the book, life will be good. As soon as you start trying to take short cuts, and things get fucked up, you have to rush so you can blame someone else. We all know its not our fault so we have to blame someone else.

We were in the process of moving, and we were down to a month, but when I saw the added stress it was putting on Arianna, I advised her we would be moving at a later date, so I opted to sign another lease for a year.

I like having a plan, in everyday life we should wake in the morning with a plan. It makes the day so much easier. Things do come up, as well as obstacle’s, but again the by the book thing.

So we are still looking and once we find a place then, I will start putting everything together.
So who is going to pick our new home? It will be Arianna, Arianna has to fall in love with it, and the kitchen is the deal breaker.
Me I could really give a fuck, as long as it is nice and clean, and public enemy number one is not selling drugs next door.
I have also been working on two books. I have released one short story already as most of you know. The Breaking Of Sabrina. A very short story, but a second is in the making and will prove to be much better and longer.

The main book I want to do is about building BDSM relationships, and being able to maintain what you have. It will also cover abuse, and what to look for when meeting a new Dominant.
I will also go into great depth about Training, and what I do and the steps I take.
It will not be much about sex. I just want to show everyone how it is possible to have an awesome relationship in our lifestyle.

I do have another Author helping out her name is Lea Barrymire
http://leabarrymire.blogspot.com/?zx=80d58364c2fa41c

I can assure you it will be good and it will have a ton of good information.

What I say here is just my opinion, and nothing more. What works for me may not work for you, but I can give you the foundation to build on.

What bothers me is when someone visits, and they want to blast me, telling me I am wrong.
Don’t get me wrong, I love comments, I love interacting with everyone, and I have made some good friends.
The truth is we are all right, while there are books out there that will give you someone good information, you have to find what works for you.

I have never gone to another Blog and bashed someone because of their views.

What I can tell you about me, is I have been in the lifestyle for more than twenty years, I know hundreds if nota thousand people, and I am very respected here in the local community.

So those of you who want to Bash me because of an opinion I have or something I have stated, you can go fuck yourself. I did say that in a polite Manner. so no need to get upset.

I have really grown over the past twenty years, and I have made many mistakes, I have been the abuser, not in a physical way it was more mental, and taking advantage of others feelings, mainly not giving a fuck.

I had a blog not long ago called, You can have your whore, and fuck me the Christians went fucking nutty, I believe it was a Morman, not that it matters

I am totally against Organized religion, for many reasons, one it is all about money and power. The Catholic’s condone child molestation. While I do enjoy watching Joel Olsteen from time to time, his net worth is about 150 million.
I am not ragging on the rich either I love to see others get ahead in life. I just see to much taking from the poor to feed the rich.

I have said before I am not politically correct, I know I am not. The reason being I am not going to live my life, to make others like me. I am not going to by pass the truth in fear of hurting someone’s feelings. If you speak to pacify others you are not being you, you are being someone else just so someone will like you.
So if you do not like my blog, or I offend you, once again just right click the X.

I know when we walk into a Munch or MAsT who likes me and who does not, but you know what ? I am good with that, I still sleep at night with a clear conscious.

So we will move in the near future, we will narrow our new home to two places, and we have one Arianna is in love with. Once we find the one, I will start putting everything together.

The biggest thing was finding someone who could move our fish aquarium , it will have to be disassembled, the fish will be bagged up and then moved. We were able to find are doing.
someone, imagine that, and someone who knows what they

Arianna and I had talked in the past about a closed Triad, I suppose that is on a hold for now, as we have not talked about it now for a couple of months.
The main problem that main her change her mind was it seemed to be more trouble than it was worth.
The key was to find the perfect fit, and everyone was either not real and playing a very bad joke, or they wanted us to adjust to their way which would never happen.
Who knows one day someone may pop out and Arianna would say WOW okay lets try this.
The one thing I could not get clear was, it was not I they had to get close to, it was Arianna.
So for now we are on hold, or maybe it will never happen.
Either way I am good.

I love doing the Interviews, if anyone would like to volunteer that would be awesome……

naked

Vile

If Your Partner Is Not Dominant

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, bdsm, BDSM Rules, Commit, commitment, communication, Consensual, consequences, consistent, control, Dominant, Dominant in Training, Dominants, If Your Partner Is Not Dominant, Master, Mentor, Protocol, Rules, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Power Exchange, TPE on August 17, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have received several emails here in the last week asking the same question. My Husband is not Dominant can I change his mind? My boyfriend is not Dominant can I change him?

Believe it or not that has been the million dollar question for years.  As a matter of fact Eve was probably talking to some chic because Adam was not Dominant. We all know what happened with Adam and Eve , Adam wanted the pussy.  So no he was not Dominant.

This is really a tough situation you ladies are in, and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but your stuck.

Well you do have a couple of options that are open to you, but you need to give those doors great thought before you open one of them, or you could choose not to open any of them.  How big of a chance are you willing to take ?

You can either come out looking like gold , or you could look like a complete idiot , and your whole life could fall apart at the seems. So it takes a great deal of thought and knowing what you really want out of life before making that freedom jump.

If your in a settled relationship and your husband or Boyfriend is not Dominant then you have a better chance of hitting the lottery, if you think he is going to change.

I am not sure where your thought process is, but to be a good Dominant does not happen over night, it does not happen in months, it can take years.

Number one most married men will not be willing to find a mentor, two you cannot learn to be a Dominant from a book, I don’t give a fuck what anyone says. You are either wired like that or your not.

Another great factor, most husbands married their mother. You cook, you clean, you pay bills, you do laundry, you take the kids out. Hubby plays golf, and watches Monday night football, and kiss’s you on the forehead and goes about his business. If anything goes wrong you also take the blame. Your his mother.

Another factor, most men do not want that type of responsibility, because then they will have to give you an hour of their time everyday. They will actually have to communicate with you but now on a deeper level.

Having to enforce rules and punish when you break one or two. Having to tell you what to do.

You cannot just say I need to to be Dominant. Here I need to you fly this 747 and Don’t crash really?

Another thing is most vanilla men see BDSM as abuse, and no matter how much you talk to them and try to explain they will see it no different.

That is like asking me to be Vanilla , it is not going to happen, I am me, your boyfriend is your boyfriend and hubby is hubby.

You have this new found submission, you need to be Dominated, you need to feel your partners control, you need to submit. It does not work that way.

I have seen couples get divorced, I have seen couples cheat and lose everything they have.

So you have a couple of options you can take, but you need to take with care.

One. You speak with your partner, in depth, you need to have a clear explanation of why you have these burning needs. Why your submissive now and you were not a year ago.  You need to be able to explain how you being submissive is going to help you.

 

Door number one. You talked to your Husband or Boyfriend and if they say no, you suck it up and just continue on the road your on.

Door Number Two .You talk about an open relationship, you have about a 90/10 chance, but hey you never know.

Door number Three. You cheat, you go behind your partners back and find someone who will take care of those needs. Here is the thing though, if your not living with your Dominant you are not getting the whole. Your only getting pieces, the kink. Your not getting the structure, the security, and that is only fun for a little while.  Then you break up and you hunt again, mean while your leading your husband along. Then you get caught, and you will get caught.

Door Number Four. You leave but you make it clear you have tried everything to make the relationship work, but you have needs as well. You also make sure when you enter a D’s relationship it is someone who is on the same page you are.  The last thing you want to do is look like a dumb ass jumping into a bunch of drama.

When you are communicating your needs to need to be completely open, you need to think about what your going to say before hand. You need to be honest and open. If your not able to openly communicate with your partner, then your will the wrong man.

There is a couple who attends our munch his wife is submissive and her husband is not Dominant. He allows her to play while he is present, but there is no sex. Now this is an awesome dude.

So Ladies which door are you going to take?

hang-up

I love this Pic

Vile

Words And Submission

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, Gorean lifestyle, Gorean Portocol, Master, Master & Slave, Master And Slave, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, The slave must adapt, The World Of BDSM, Thekinkyworldofvile, Total Slavery, Total Submission, TPE, Train your slave, Training Arianna, training your slave with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 14, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

One thing I do during training is, I utilize what is called speaking in thirds. This is something that is common in the Gorean lifestyle.

To me speaking in thirds has a purpose, and the purpose is to make one focus, to think, to think before they speak.

The words tend to have more meaning, and the slave is able to explains things better if she has to think before speaking.

Speaking in thirds gives one a total different aspect of who and what they are, it is like a reminder, and it teaches self discipline.

Once I start training I use the technique for a couple of weeks or sometimes I will use as a form of punishment, again to make the slave think.

When a Dominant uses the word Train, it is good to ask what he hopes to get out of it, and how the training is going to benefit you ?

So the night before last we were laying in bed, I was watching shark week, Bah Humbug, and I get an email. Guess from who? Yup Arianna, I was like what but sometimes she is able to express herself better writing things down, or in an email , than talking sometimes and I do understand her reasoning.

Arianna was expressing interest in speech restriction, and using the term your property when addressing me.

Her reasoning was it would make her feel a deeper submission, not only speaking in thirds but using the word property.

Once you give up full control , and you learn to follow the rules, protocols, it becomes a habit, and when things are a habit there are times we do not even realize we are doing them.

That is how Arianna feels at times, everything just falls into place and she does not see her submission.

That is why I have said in the past it is very important for the Dominant to remain consistent on a daily basis. If you say something, then mean what you say. If you say your going to do something then do it.

Although I am not Gorean I do follow many of the protocols, and I am consistent.

I can also tell you what rules work for one does not work for another. It would be almost impossible for every slave or submissive to have the same rules.

What protocols, and rituals that worked for one will not work for another. Every Slave or sub is different, their habits are different, but more so their needs…

Behavior Modification, changing the way one thinks or acts, in public or private.  Changing ones thoughts, or how they view things.

This can be done, if the Dominant is true to the relationship , but just as I tell those who are submissive, I tell the Dominants the same thing. Be careful what you ask for.

The best way to kick off your training, is for both to be able to take a vacation, and no I am not joking. You have kinda like a 5 to 7 day mini boot camp.

Before you say anything Arianna has been there, and she can tell you that her changes have only been positive.  Being able to let your mind go, and just flow with your training, but truthfully training can only be successful if you trust the one your with.

So there are some who wish to move into a deeper submission, even after training, the training never really stops, it does continue and it is daily maintenance.

The changing of one word , yes that is all it takes, just as Arianna stated in her email.

Instead of using the word I, she wanted to use your slave, or this slave.

About a month ago , I instructed Arianna to use the words Thank You. Thank You for everything.

Thank you for letting me sit, shower, bathroom. After taking the first bite of food, Thank You.

This all falls under Behavior Modification, but you as the Dominant you need to remain consistent.

You know what I truly find disturbing is a Dominant who is not really a Dominant, but enters a relationship with a Baby Girl a Submissive, under false pretenses. Promising one thing but not being able to deliver.

The Dominant not thinking of the negative effects he is having on someones life, the damage that is being done, and playing with someones emotions.

Then it is clearly not the Submissive who is the problem, it is the Dominant who will put all the blame on the sub or baby girl because the relationship did not work. When in fact the Dominant either had no intentions of making things work, or he did not have a clue.

Changing one word, can change ones life.

problem

Vile