Archive for the violence Category

Earning Ones Submission

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, anger, Anger Issues, Bad Dominant, Bad Reltionships, bdsm, Cheating Dominant, Commit, commitment, communication, conceded, control, controlling, Daddy Dom, Depression, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominants who suffer from depression, emotional, Emotions, Fake Dominants, Health, Humiliation, Married Dominant, Master & Slave, pussy, Rules, self confidence, Self-Discipline, sex, slave, Structure, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used, sucking cock, Total Submission, TPE, violence, you have to train yourself with tags , , , , , , , , on October 6, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

First of all I would like to apologize for yesterdays post. That post is not who or what I am. After being called out in public by someone who clearly has no clue about submission or the lifestyle just really set me off.
If it had been a private email things would of been much different and probably not even brought up.

At one time I just expected submission, if you were submissive you belonged on your knees with a full mouth. I did not want to hold you, I did not want to hear about your day, I could care less about your family or friends. In fact I did not even want you to speak unless you were cooking and wanted to know what I wanted to eat.

Those who are true slave, and submissive’s are not weak, infact those who wish to submit are very strong, and most are very intelligent, but for some reason some see it as a weakness, and some Doms prey on such.

So it took me from about the age of 14 until I reached maybe 31 to realize there was so much more out there.

The truth is when I looked at a woman , I saw three holes and nothing more. You were only good if you were on your knees, your back or ass in the air.
Aftercare was unheard of, you know fuck that. If you want aftercare hold your pillow.
That was really my train of thought. Women were put here to suck cock, cook and clean.

I remember being out in California, I was seeing this little Blonde, well okay I saw her once. As she was sucking my cock in the Mcdonalds parking lot while I was eating my big mack, I didn’t even let her finish. I pulled her up by her hair and looked at her eye to eye, and I asked, what the fuck are you doing ? I am sucking your dick. Um no your being stupid and your broken, I started the car and she asked where we were going and I said I am taking you home, then I am going to jack off.
If you wanted to hang out you were going to suck my dick, or lay on your back. That was really my train of thought.

By the time I left Korea I knew how easy it was to get in someone’s head. It was so easy to play off of someone’s emotions. Once you were able to find that emotion button, it was game on, until I grew tried of her, which was maybe a week, that was a long term relationship to me.

When I first met you within the first 5 minutes, I knew if you sucked dick, and took it up the ass, if you answered no to any of those two questions the conversation was over.

Although I was active in the community, it was really hard for me to hookup with anyone at the local events, because they all knew me, and what I was about.

My early 30’s my train of thought began to change, as I began to have more interest in submission. I wanted to know what made them tick, what made them think, and why they needed to be submissive.

Over the years I have seen a pattern, this does not include EVERYONE so please take note.

I have had the privilege of meeting a lot of slaves and submissive’s , and one thing I have noticed , while each is very unique many had something in common. Many suffered from depression , anxiety , and even bipolar while most were on medication there was a handful who were not.
Many of these women tend to trust way to easy, thus making them an easy target.
The one major thing they all have in common is they are looking for security, they are seeking a home, and someone who will provide structure and safety.
Under the right circumstances many will adapt without question.
I can assure you that you will not find a more loyal partner. All we have to do is provide the right setting.
I have said in the past the first 90 days are the hardest but that is not always the case, many will fall right into place with the proper communication.

Trust is a huge issue and many are willing to turn over their life to you, in hopes you will take care of them.

If the Dominant is truly interested in you, he will have a long list of questions.
It is up to you to answer and be as honest as you can. If the answer is no, do not be afraid to say no, do not say yes just to please.

You should never allow anyone to demand you call them Sir , Master or Daddy. The Dominant will know it will come in time, he will know he has to earn your trust, and respect.

I know twenty years ago I didn’t care what you called me as long as you were on your knees. I had the attitude a woman had three pussy’s and they were just used as a cum dump nothing more. If I wanted to see you again I would say so, but I would make it clear I was not looking for anything long term.
Hey Vile can I come and visit? Sure you can if you plan on sucking cock I could use the company, that was the attitude I had, but I never lead anyone on.
Today I am not sure why some men have that need, why they have the need to lead on. Make someone believe something that is not true.
Well I plan on leaving my wife, yea we all know that is bullshit because if he was going to leave his wife he would just do it
Trust me I am not having sex with my wife. Really ? Get the fuck out. There is pussy in his bed and it is not free so he is fucking her.
My wife said I could see other people. Okay fine let me talk to her, since she does not care.
Yea then his cock sucker shuts up, well um not today or its okay she just does not want to know.
Okay when are you leaving? Why have you not left already if she is such a bitch ?

Last, a man who has a temper, a man who has a drinking problem, a man who is cheating on his wife , a man who is abusive , mental or physical , a man who lies.

Listen to me, that man is no Dominant, that man is no Master, That man is no Daddy Dom. In fact that man is nothing at all, he is just taking up valuable oxygen others need..

If a man cannot control his own life how can he control someone else?

Someone said the other day I am an egomaniac , and that statement is so far from the truth.
I may be a little cocky at times, but in real, I am just very confident.



If something is earned you have so much more respect. There is no greater gift than earning someone’s submission.

Abuse Is Alive And Real ,A Friend Took Her Life This Week , She Will Be Missed

Posted in abuse, bdsm, munchs, relationships, slave, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used, Verbal abuse, violence with tags , on July 11, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I knew a submissive who has been lost for many years. In person she always seemed very upbeat , the last time Arianna and I saw her at a munch, she made the comment, I wish I could have what you two have.
On Wednesday night of this week she committed suicide and took her own life.

Her name on Fetlife is Pocket Mouse, and at the tender age of 22, had a full life in front of her.

Here is a message from a friend of mine, after I emailed him to confirm what I was reading on her wall.

written about 1 hour ago:

Hey did pocket mouse pass?

written about 1 hour ago:

Yes she took her own life Wednesday ….fucking sad, last week she seemed idea what triggered her to take her own life…very sad

written about 1 hour ago:

Wow I am so so sorry , she was truly a good person. Just lost at times. WOW I am like numb

written about 1 hour ago:

she has really gone through a lot over the past couple of years

written about 1 hour ago:

I used to joke with her about being my favorite daughter…her bio family and she never got along while growing up and she was mentally abused by a so called Mistress from Melbourne and I felt she never fully recovered.
What goes around comes around to bite you in the ass I HOPE.

written 43 minutes ago:

I knew about the Mistress. We had only met a couple of times, once at the Chinese buffet when she was trying to put a munch together, and out at our munch.

Just at a loss of words

Thank you

I had contacted her a couple of years ago when I saw she was looking for a place to start a Munch. I new a Buffet that had a large room they were not using so I agreed to meet her there, and speak with the owners.
There had been a Much there in the past so I knew they would not mind.

Pocket Mouse was really a confused girl, not ever knowing where to turn, and would take people for their word, she was truly a follower, and she trusted so so easy.

Then comes the Mistress , this relationship was only about mental and physical abuse. Sometimes it is not as easy as just packing things up and moving.
Just as the other Dominant had stated he felt she never fully recovered from the relationship and the abuse. I cannot imagine the mental abuse she was subjected to, and the lasting effects.

Before you enter a relationship , you need to make sure your in the right place, and your with the right Dominant or Mistress before you hand over power. This is no game , you can get hurt.

22 years old, still just a young woman, with many years ahead of herself.
With a Mistress who did not care, or did not want to understand her.

The last words she said to me, I wish I had what you two have.



A Slave Shows Up At The Bus Station

Posted in abuse, Aftercare, bdsm, blog, Bond, Chat, Cheat, cheating, Cherish, communication, control, controlling, Daddy Dom, Domestic Abuse, Email, FaceBook, Fear, Humiliation, married, Runaway, sadist, Safe, Safe and Sane, slave, Spanking, Thekinkyworldofvile, violence on November 22, 2012 by thekinkyworldofvile

About six months ago,  a slave who follows my blog emailed me and wanted my yahoo id. I enjoy chatting with people so I gladly gave it to her.

We chatted on and off on a regular basis. Then she found me on Face Book. I play a few games, and she began playing games with me. She was posting pictures on my page, but it was like we were interacting with each other, for instance her and her dog was playing tug of war, but the caption was sparky, Amber, and Vile playing tug a war.

She is married, has three children. She has been married since 2006. She married an Egyptian, which there is nothing wrong with that.  She met him in a religious Chat room.

She saved money to fly over, they met. She came home started the paper work, paid for his ticket over, paid for the wedding rings, and the wedding.

Okay the wages are not that good in Egypt I suppose I can see this happening. Shortly after the marriage the abuse starts, mostly verbal. He soon adopts her children, and bring his parents over, where he spent the majority of his time, with her children.

Both worked at her parents family owned businesses. He worked for a short while, then left, to go to school to be an RN which he has never completed. Amber was the bread winner, but both lived in one of her parents houses and paid 200 a month for rent, just to cover the property taxes.

A little back ground on Amber. . She is very very tiny, very beautiful. When she sleeps she looks like Mona Lisa. Amber is also Deaf. So being she does read lips, I can see she would have trouble reading someones lips from a different country. If someone did not have patients when they had to repeat several times I could see where some anger issues would come in.

A little deeper now, to give a better prospective on what Amber was like and what she needs. In the end I was unable to provide that for her even though I opened my home to her.

At the age of 18, Amber moved to KC she moved in with a roommate. Shortly after she met a man named Mike.Who just happened to be a Sadist. I am not going to say if her story is true, but it was a little out there, and to make it up, well I am not sure.

Mike basically held her hostage for almost three years. Ana commented on her blog which is no longer up. It is there but blank.

Most of the time she slept in a closet tied up. When out she serviced Mike and his mother. No sex between Mike’s mother.

In the course of three and a half years, she was a total slave not allowed out of the house. Her cheek bone was broken , as well as a finger.

In the course of her travels she had three children with two different men. It happens I am not here to judge her.

She was verbally abused at work, I am guessing because of having to repeat things to much.

Around Mid October I get an IM on Face Book. Here is the Beginning of our conversation.

each Sand

Chat Conversation Start
October 17

Do we know each other

Somewhat, ur nickname is Vile and a writer of many helpful blots. You might know me as slavetowant. We never met in person. :)

no we have not your in orlando?
you have a Daddy

I’m from Wichita, ks.

I was a few miles off
same birthday
why are you single

Where did you guesses? We do have same b-day :) I’m married only by name for children’s sake.

your the first to fine me on FB

Really? I used find your friends button by email. That’s how I found you.

so how are you

I’m doing good. How about you? Are you still writing your blogs? I haven’t been on wordpress for a long while. Busy with work and looking for another job.
Hows everything on ur end?

yes I am still blogging I am good

Bet I have a lot of reading to catch up on. :D

Pretty much you should always take a few minutes of time for yourself
October 19

yeah i shld. How are you? Hows the weather down there? :)

I just got back from the beach

What happened to your wordpress

how was ur time at the beach? I totally forgot my password on WordPress but no worries, i just made a new one :) Right now im reading my favorite writers’ blogs. I just read some of yours. :) Trouble is its hard to remember the titles but its easy to remember whats it all about!

That you, dont for get to let me know what the new blog is. I would write the password down maybe

sure, ill let u know. Im thinking about what to write… many thoughts, dont know what to start with. :)

at the begining

which begining? :D lol

honestly, im picking up where i left off sometime during the month i stopped blogging. :) Thanks for helping :)
will let u know as soon im done :)
ttyl and have a wonderful afternoon
October 22

Your pretty fucking hot there missy

thank you :) How was ur weekend?

Well it was ok, would of been better if you had been here

:) awww Yeah, Im sure we would have good time. Are you moving to another state?

Most likely yes, Tnn probably. Yes a lot of fun.

If u dont mind me asking, how come? I would have thought Florida would be like a paradise with nice weather.

Its ok, my dad is not doing well. Tnn is really pretty, ive been looking at houseboats
Why are you single?

Im sorry to hear about your dad, hope he gets better soon. Actually, I’m married only by name for children’s sake.

That is not a good situation

we make the best of it for kids sake.Im looking for article about daddy dom. Have you written any or know any common knowledge of what is daddy dom?

I will write something for you. Daddy Doms are very special. I am working on my first fiction now. What would you like to know? I was in a daddy relationship for a long time with bea
I wrote about her

Wonderful! I appreciate that. Is your first fiction going to be in your blog? I think i have read about you and bea. Is she the one you fell in love with? Im curious how daddy dom’s behavior and mindset should be and what are common expectations of daddy and the girl?

Well the truth any Dom should be able to fill that role, I mean if he really cares. A Dom no matter should always be calm and in control, very supportive, loving,
The daddy should support the girl in every way, encourage, insure she meets all her goals
Calm, cool, and collective
One should never show anger, yell so on

Are you seeing a dom now ?

no, i dont. I have a childhood friend that says he is. So far we are just friends, getting to know each other again.

What has he shown in the way of being a dominant. The topic of sex should not come up for sometime. Ask about past subs he has had or other doms he knows that you can meet. You are in control until you chose to submit
I dont know him , you do.

Thats the trouble im having. He hasnt shown anything but just being a listener, not talktive much, going with flow kind of a guy. Its almost like pulling teeth with him and kinda of awkward sometimes….I cant imagine him being one. He said he was daddy dom for couple of years and only had 1 girl. That one girl isnt a friend to him anymore; they hate each other….

Well I would back off. A dominant is very confident, most are out spoken, all show some type of authority, firm when he speaks, he will look at you in the eyes when he talks. He is in control. Takes charge. You cannot just take his word. Last night I was on a date , I invited a master and slave along.
He has to know other dominants if he is really in the lifestyle

If he is not in control, how can he control you?

Thats what i assumed doms to be; confident, says whats on his mind, Extrovert type of behavior. He doesnt know any others and I know u have said this in other words in ur writings that its good if doms are known among others and attends get togethers.

Ask him what his role a daddy ia
Correct I did say that. So all you have is his word no proof at all. So the question is do you just roll the dice, or wait

I have asked today and am waiting for his reply. I honestly dont think hes “it” :)
Im waiting for a sign
Dont think ill see it

For instance last night I ordered my food as well as hers. I knew what she liked before hand.
I controlled the conversation, that is just my nature

what did you ordered?

Prior to meeting the couple I set guide lines for her, when to speak and not to.
She had 9oz prim rib, and a salad baked potato

Ask him about sub space and how he takes one to that point

I will ask him im hungry….

Go eat

i forgot my lunch lol! guess u can say its monday.

Well that has to

yep it does

You have never been with a dom be careful. Ill even talk with them if you wish, email

his answer for daddy dom is ……”just one that provides takes care of punishes and makes certain demands from time to time”

Really ? Are you serious
Get the fuck out

yeah, im so glad i didnt “roll over” for him
We kinda hit it off from that point. Chatting daily, playing different games, but I noticed she was paying way to much attention to me, okay maybe she is just a little lonely.
Last Friday I was on Face Book wondering where she was, and I receive a text from her.. I remembered she was off on Fridays , so I ask where are you. Her reply was I am in Arkansas . What the fuck are you doing in Arkansas ? She reply’s I will be in Daytona Beach at 6.35am on Saturday. Okay why are you coming to Daytona Beach. She states to stay with you.
I sit dumb founded scratching my head. What about your husband ad children. I am done I am tired of the abuse, and the children have very little do do with me anymore.
6.55 am I show up at the bus station walk in and there she sits. Like Mona Lisa.
She brought 3 small back packs with her, I singled for her to pick them up and follow me to the car. While on the way home she was glued to me, would not let go. Once home I told her to shower. I found a long Tee Shirt she would wear as a gown she is that small. Then I let her sleep.
She slept for about four hours. I cooked her dinner, and we talked. So everything back home is straight Amber, she said yes. I said how did you tell everyone you were leaving. She replied I left a note and told a co-worker.. I just look at her with a blank face.
Amber was starved for affection, she would not let go of me. I knew then there was more to her story than what she told me, but I let her be.
Now I am thinking the shit is going to hit the fan, a petite deaf girl is missing. I told her to contact her sister in law on Face Book to insure she was okay.  Monday I made her show me, she did not. I made her do it right then.
She wanted to play, so I tied her up, she could not get lose like she thought she could. We did have sex, which was really fucking incredible. The best in years.
Sunday Night I noticed she was not feeling well, she was running a very high fever. I got up went to wal greens, pickup flu medicine, cough medicine, and drops, by morning she was feeling better.
Amber wanted to be treated the way Mike treated her. I could not do that. Number one, I did not know her well enough, number two she was still sick.
Wednesday she received and email from her Husband, it had to be a good one, because she wanted to leave after being with me for five days. The real reason she wanted to leave I am guessing, is because she thought she could relive Mike. I guess from reading my blog she thought I could be who she needed.
Under the right circumstances I probable be who she wanted and needed, Maybe. What she needed is really deep. Just meeting, I did not have those kind of feelings.
So last night around 10.30pm I get a text.
You do not know me. We are just friends on Face Book. Well no it does not work like that. I will tell the truth, about everything, if I am asked.
I do wish her well, I really do. We did hit it off really good. She was a lot of fun to be with, very easy to talk to.
What really bothers me is. The abuse is not going to stop, it will only get worse now. She does deserve much better…
ImageThe bad thing is I would probably Let her come back.

You are a Reflection of your Dominant

Posted in abuse, bdsm, communication, control, controlling, Protocol, Protocol public, Punishment, relationships, Religion, Safe and Sane, Sane, sharing, slave, Spanking, submissive, training your slave, violence on November 1, 2012 by thekinkyworldofvile

I may have posted on this topic before. I did not want to scroll through 350 post to see. This was just something I was thinking about last night, while in bed.

I taught a Munch in Deland Florida for short time, but dues to an accident I was in, and a great lack of respect towards the lifestyle, and here we go again the protocol.

A friend of mine and I arrived early the first munch, C who is a Dominant has been a good friend on and off for sometime. It was funny because after Bea and I broke up, she ended up seeing C for about a year. He had gone through her phone and retrieved my phone number and email. After the split he contacted me.

We had already ordered our drinks, I drink sweet tea when out. I never drink and drive, I save the Jack for home.

I was seeing someone named Lynn , she was the married Jehovah Witness I have spoken about. I picked her up, then swung by and picked up C and we were sitting and talking about what ever, and I turn and see this couple walking towards us, I look at C and ask him what the fuck is that.

The Dom was dressed okay, but his submissive wow. She looked like she had just come from a homeless shelter. Her hair was not brushed, she was a bigger woman which does not matter, it is how you carry yourself. She had no bra on , wearing an old tank top and a pair of cotton shorts her crotch was eating.

Lyn who is taller than I am stands at about 5 ‘ 9 135lbs and is well over 6ft in heels. She was wearing a tight skirt that barely covered her ass, with a real nice blouse on, and makeup. It always took her about 6 hrs to get ready, ill never understand that, but you could tell the other submissive felt uncomfortable, and she should have.

I am going to start attending a munch next month a Mistress has just started in Port Orange Florida. Jane and I have pretty much the same belief’s and protocol when it comes to the lifestyle, I believe she may be a little more stricter than I am.

The BDSM community is really pretty small. Once you get out and start attending local events you are sure to run into someone while out in public. I have several people in the lifestyle on a few of my social sites, but very vanilla, with the exception of one submissive who just post some pretty wild shit. I do not care let her be who she is..

So your looking for a Dominant, once you have made that step, you begin a new learning process, a whole new world. He is going to take windows XP out and install windows 8.

When you first meet sex should be the last agenda. I very seldom have sex with a new submissive with in the first month maybe longer.

Now there are some exceptions to my rule, but never I mean never on the first couple of meetings. It takes a month or longer to get to know someone, this is seeing someone on a regular basis. If you start the relationship out sexual, then that is all you have.

Once the submissive has giving herself, that takes things to a new level, so we as Dominants should take note, if we are ready to move that fast.

The KEY to gaining ones submission is being able to get into the submissive’s head. The Key to getting a submissive to submit, is to gain her respect. The Key to leading, and having one follow is to show you are in full control, and not controlling.

You cannot begin to give out rules just from chatting and talking on the phone. You as the Dominant cannot possibly know the submissive on that level. Again the Key is getting to know her. This takes time, just as dating someone, and wanting a relationship, it takes time to build a foundation.

Yes there are exceptions to the rules above. If the two are just interested in a kink relationship, and they see it going no further, then go for it, have fun. Go for it.

While in a relationship, I encourage my slave to speak with other slaves or subs, even Dominants. I want to show the difference in the lifestyle, the way some of the subs or slaves live, their rules, and protocol.

There is a Master and Slave couple who lives in south Florida who have been master and slave since they were just out of high school, they have been married 25 years now, while her and I are closer, R did monitor our chat conversations for sometime, and I understand that. The talk should never turn negative, nor should it turn sexual. I am sure that from time to time he will ask her to pull the chats up, and that is a very good idea.

There are several Dominants of respect for here in the area., and I speak with both, but in a respectful way as it should be.

The reflection, is how you as a submissive carry yourself when out, with friends, how you dress act. You never know when someone in the lifestyle may see you, or who you may run into.

Now the same goes for your Dominant, for the most we are calm cool and collective. We are in control and should act as such while out. We are a leader not a follower.

Being a Dominant does not happen over night, nor is it easy. As with most men we have anger issues, and alter ego, and controlling. So we have to take the time and yes install a new windows, so to speak, we have to reprogram the way we act, speak. We have to learn the difference between being in control, and not controlling. Then the other, the Bondage, spanking, all the other kink. I was taught 90% of what I know, and there is more I want to explore, but I need to be shown. I have never nor do I want to hurt anyone.

So we as Dominants have the same protocol if not higher, while in public or private. We are teachers, well so to speak.

The reprogramming is not an easy task, the first is our tempers, all males have a temper, but again the KEY is learning to control it. This took me several years.Although I do contribute much to me belief’s and meditation, it is simply thinking about what your going to say before the words come out. More so if your angry.

If you as a Dominant are angry, no matter what this is something that we should not show, in front of ours. So the KEY is to clearly think before we speak, take in a deep breath, then let the words flow.

There is never an instance when a Dom should yell, or fight with a sub or slave, after all who is really in charge. When you as the Dominant show anger , we are now showing a weakness, this is a new button for the sub to push.

A submissive will push her limits, to see how far she can go, just what she can and cannot get away with. It is up to us, to stay in control. Many times this will throw the sub for a loop, when you stay in full control of a situation.

Again if we cannot control our emotions, how do we control a submissive. You will find that by punishing will get you much further. I am not speaking of beating, or spanking. Most subs love to be spanked, if you beat or threaten, that falls under abuse.

You take something away that is very dear to them, their laptop, kindle, corner time, or just simply ignore, that is the killer, but before you punish you need to sit down and explain why you are doing what your doing, in a nice even, in control voice. You will find you will gain much more ground, and the respect level will go higher as well.

Remember communication again is the KEY. you as a Dominant should set time aside each day to just talk, give your submissive free rein , let her express herself, her needs, without worry of being punished, you will find this will help you grow.




Posted in abuse, bdsm, Rape, slave, submissive, violence on July 21, 2012 by thekinkyworldofvile

I was posed the question, by my post women were put here to serve. A man raping his wife that draws a fine line with me, although I am not a religious man, the bible does say the wife must submit.

In my lifestyle I find it kinda of hard for a dominant to rape his submissive or slave. There is an agreement prior to entering the relationship. I do believe women were put here for service, again domestic or sexual.

Can a boyfriend rape his girlfriend, yes I do believe that. If a woman says stop, then you stop. The word no means just that no.

Rape is not about sex, or pleasure, it is about power. rage, violence , it has nothing to do with pleasure.The affects on the one who was raped, last for years. Some do not recover, from the act.

I know submissives and slaves who have been raped, and none of them reported, because of the lifestyle. I am not sure how they do it, but they just kick the dirt and move on. Many fake dominants prey on submissive women, just because they think they are an easy target, .

At one time the BDSM community was very close, and it was easy to weed out the fake doms, for what ever reason its just like any other community, everyone is in their own little group.

Question do you believe a Dominant can rape his submissive or slave ?