I have been around for a few years and I am more of an observer , I enjoy figuring people out. Just sitting listening and taking information in. Over the years I have met a lot of people and the one thing I have noticed is when it comes to the BDSM lifestyle the first impression is not always true when it comes to peoples actions.
When you first meet someone be it a Dominant or Master the first impression means absolutely nothing. Most times it takes 3 or 4 conversations and once someone is comfortable with you the truth flows from their mouth. 9 out of 10 you find they are full of their own shit and nothing more.
The M’s community is very small that would be Master and Slave relationships , not LDR but when two actually live together. If you do not live with and cannot reach out and touch someone the training if any will not be effective. If the slave does not live with you , you have no real control , only the control you are told you have.
Now I am far from perfect , but I keep my word , I am who I am and I follow through with what I say. I run a very strict high protocol home , where the word yes means yes and no means no. My slave comes first even before family , that my friend is very important.
The Pussy Dominant I call them a real down to earth Pussy who spends their lives being topped from the bottom in hopes for a little pussy or a blow job from time to time. The pussy Dominant is giving just enough control to boost their ego , many times having to beg to get laid. This type of dominant is afraid to enforce any rules in fear of making the submissive mad. Only when in public do they show show their dominance until the submissive either speaks up or gives that fuck you look. This is the Dominant who did not negotiate the relationship or was scared to in fear of the submissive walking away , remember the Pussy Dominant. The pussy Dominant is one with zero experience and while being topped from the bottom they have no clue as to what is happening. The pussy Dominant can be told no and will go along with it , only because the fear of the pussy getting cut off.
These types of Dominants are driving by sex and sex only. This is a chance to get their kink on even if they are told no much of the time. The pussy Dominant looks much like a sad , sad puppy. This is the Dominant who wants advice but will not follow anything in fear of what pussy hr gets being cut off
A D’s relationship , M’s relationship should be 100% consensual , the relationship should always be negotiated before making any type of commitment.
A angry mans words are a calm mans thoughts. No man or Dominant should raise his voice out of anger to his partner or Slave. These are the same men who will call them a stupid bitch and in an hour expect them to lay on their back.
A Dominant who has anger issues is not a Dominant. You just do not wake one morning and say hey I am a Dominant and I want a submissive or a slave. A slave is looking for a few quality things in life. One being security , another would be communication , wanting a Dominant who understands them and are able to meet their needs in life. One of the last being taking care of , not so much monetary but the mental side , the physical side , knowing they are cared for and they come first before anything or anybody.
Something that rarely comes up is depression , those who are on medication, those who may be Bi-Polar , suffer from anxiety , or just depression. If you like millions are on medication , you can take all the medication you need but if your home life is a total wreck then the medication is worthless. If you are being yelled at or told how worthless you are , or even becoming physical then the meds you are taking serve no purpose.
If a Dominant cannot control their own life then how can they control someone else ? Calling you names or hitting you then expecting you to lay on your back to fuck. How would this situation be helping you as a slave? How could you treat your property so bad then expect to have your dick sucked ? Or maybe fuck and expect them to enjoy ?
If things are not going your way then maybe take a looking at the training you provided. What did you do to improve the situation? Are you keeping your word , you know the words you spoke when you first met. When you talked about how you were in control , you had zero problems , zero drama , how calm you are , you remember those words yes?
While I do enjoy Mentoring I can be very demanding , if a question is asked and I give advice I expect it to be followed. If not followed and you call again and ask another question I re-answer the first question because I am assuming you did not get it the first time.. Something I bring up to everyone is the importance of getting in the subs head.. Out of all my years I have only had one Dominant ask me how to, yes only one.
I have come to a age in life where I will no longer be mentoring anyone , for one I just do not have the time and two the lifestyle has changed to more of a kink base.
Maybe there are a few other types ?
Vile
I love the analogy. In my life, I find that when the focus is on my Master, other things seem less important. There’s a freedom in prioritizing ones life in one direction. There’s always an answer. I wear an engraved bracelet that states, WWMD, ( what would Master do?). This reminds me that my actions both public and private reflect my submission. Another bracelet is engraved, VKA, Vile knows all. This isn’t because he’s egotistical but because in my submission there are no secrets. My likes, needs, wants and desires, even thoughts are to be known to my Master. I strive to be complete in my submission. My submission is no longer mine to give but once accepted it became a need. The need to continue my commitment to Him.
It was easy for me to walk down the path of slavery. My Master portrayed confidence, intrigue, intelligence, and insightful questions. He challenged me to look past my own definitions and become His definition. So, His needs became my wants. His wants became my desires. His desires became my goals. It was an AHA moment when I released my own vision of what slavehood should look like and adopted His. That was hard because I wanted to give more and more. I trust that although I need to anticipate His needs that He will not allow me to continue once His own definition of Mastery is completed. In other words, I had to let go of my ambitious ways that were intruding into His ideal vision and release my own desires and adopt His even if the picture was different.
The compass is a great picture of ones truth. The stronger the bond, the deeper the connection, and the freedom in adopting another’s life as their own is a wonderful achievement in my own journey. For us, it works and each day I can look forward to having a focus in the turbulent seas of life because I have found my compass.
Thank you
~arianna