Archive for pussy spanking

When I Was A Daddy Dom

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Arianna, Baby Girl, bdsm, BDSM Collar, Change, Consensual, consequences, Consistency, consistent, Daddy, Daddy Dom, Daddy Doms, Divorce, Dominant, fuck hole, fuck meat, fucking, hoe, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, kinkster, kinky, Loyal, Manipulation, masochist, Master And Slave, Mentor, mistakes, Pain Slut, punish, Punishment, pussy, Rough Sex, Rules, sadist, SADOMASOCHISM, session, slave, slut, Structure, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used with tags , , , on July 13, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

I actually met Bea online about 6 months before my life pretty much fell apart, we did not meet in person until about a month before I moved out.

I had already confessed to my then wife who I was and what my needs were. I also knew there was no turning back I had already reveled way to much information.
Then came the divorce, I had stayed at the house because of guilt, but the day the divorce was final, out the door I walked.
I let behind my 1976 Fiat Spider,my 1955 chevy that I had before we married, but the judge felt she needed it, and the 160.000 dollars we had in the bank account.
I left with a duffel bag and my Yamaha 750 Seca. It had about 77.000 miles on it, and I had about 1600 dollars on me.
Bea and I had met at an apartment I was going to rent. It was beach side in Daytona Beach. A nice 4 unit building, 2 upstairs and 2 down stairs. I opted for the top floor.
Two weeks later bea moved in as my submissive. It was some 6 months later I collared her. We had drove up to St Augustine for sunrise and I collared her by the old Spanish fort.

At that time I was going through some serious changes in life, I still had a huge guilty feeling concerning the Divorce. I had a young son as well, but instead of the 85.00 a week I was suppose to pay in child support, I paid 600 a month sometimes up to a 1000.00 dollars.

During this time I decided to drive a cab locally, who would of thought you could make a 1000.00 dollars a week driving a cab. I also drove a limo as well kinda like an on call thing.
Bea was working part time at a day care but wanted to be a teacher. So I set that as a goal. During our relationship I set many goals for her, because I wanted her to succeed in life, I also knew being her first daddy it would not last.
It is not to often the Baby Girl stays with their first Daddy and I knew that. I was 37 and Bea Had not been 18 very long, yea I was robbing the cradle. Her mom and dad came unglued. It was not very pretty at all, but they more less wanted her out of their hair anyway.

Bea was a cutter, she was a bad cutter, she could no longer wear short sleeves or shorts that were very short. There were times she would just cry for no reason.

I walked in the bedroom to let Bea know dinner was ready and when I walked in she was cutting herself. I just looked and said when your done , dinner is ready. That is all I said and nothing more.

Our relationship continued to grow, now Bea was about 5’2 a little chunky, she had the palest skin I had ever seen, Dark black eyes, and black hair that went to her ass, she was really beautiful.

As we continued to grow our communication also grew, and the more we communicated, the more she was able to release.

Now I was going through a lot of changes, prior to getting Married I was a full blow sadist, Sherri was my first slave. I had grown cold, no feelings and I cared about no one even Sherri. Cherri was just a target, nothing more. The whole time we were together for what ever reason I never fucked her, not one time. There was either something about her, or I did not want to become that emotionally close.
She loved being fisted, once my hand was in I would just pound that bitch, fucking her with my arm as hard as I could. I would have her tied down spread eagle on the bed, spanking her pussy with my hand, I would use a belt, and just spank and spank until it was so swollen, it almost looked deformed.

At first I got off on the humiliation, I got off on inflicting pain, I got off on seeing the pain in her eyes, but it soon became a burden, because each session I had to out do the last.

Before getting married I was jumping from one slut to another, but now I was fucking.
Yahoo profiles that was the shit. I could log on and have a date in an hour. I was upfront as well, you are just fuck meat and nothing more. Today or the next couple of days you are my whore.

So I was going through an adjustment, I met an older Dominant his name was Animel, yup that is his real name. He looked like a pissed off Santa Clause, I stayed by his side day in and day out. My mind could not take in enough information. To this day I consider him a mentor, we are not as close as we once were, but he is still here..

Six months into our relationship Bea has just gotten out of the bath, and walked into the living room , and kneel and said Master I want you to have this I do not need it any longer, and she handed me her razor. I took it from her and I said good girl, and I held her for what seemed like hours.

I had to teach her how to cook, she could not boil water, but that was really no task because I love to cook.
At night most of the time I would bath her, and wash her hair, once out we went to the bedroom and I would put lotion on her.

She followed rules and protocols without question. I do believe I was somewhat stricter then than I am now. Once she was home she had a collar and leash she would put on, the chain ran through the whole apartment.

This was about the time I was starting up my internet cigar Business, which was really doing very well. It was almost to the point I was not going to have to work any longer.

I remember one day we walked into a golf store I was seeing about putting cigars in his store, and Bea had stopped at the door and just stood there with her hands in front of her. The clerk asked me what she was doing and I said just what she is suppose to, we are talking, she has nothing to do with this. When I walked out, Bea was two steps behind me.

Bea wanted to lose weight, not that she really needed to, so everyday we would walk 3 miles, down A1A and back, in the evening just as the sun was setting.
It was almost our 5th year together and Bea enrolled in UCF She wanted to become a teacher, she had really come a long way, and I supported her in everything she wanted to do.
After all that is what Daddy’s do, we want our girls to grow, we encourage growth.

It was really amazon because going on 5.5 years and we had not yet had an argument.This was due to us being so open, and the communication we had, but I also had a tight leash on her as well.
I allowed her to have friends in and out of the lifestyle, and once a month she was allowed to have a girls night out..

I came home one evening and Her demeanor was different she was more girly , although she was wearing her collar and chain.
As I started dinner because I did 90% of the cooking she started talking about how her feelings had changed, how she had been talking to other girls about their daddy’s.
I was not sure where all of this was going, but after dinner I helped her with her homework, and once we were ready for bed. She went to the bathroom and came back in and she kneeled and ask for permission to enter the bed, she handed me a bottle , a baby bottle, and she asked me if I would feed her, I was stumped at first but I said sure.
This was the transition from Dominant and submissive to Daddy and baby girl.
If it had been anyone else I do not believe I would of went through such a transition.

To date she had only been punished twice, she walked a straight line, and was very proper inside and out. Friends who would come over always made a comment about how good of a host she was.

Something happened though, and I started to let my feelings get in the way. I no longer wanted to tell her what to do, or what to wear, or what to take out for dinner. I stopped enforcing rules, I let protocols slide.

Once I realized what had happened , I tried to regain control but it was way to late, we even had long conversations about what was going on, because we could feel both of us falling apart.
Once you lose control, there is no way to get it back. Because a different side of you has been seen, that is something a submissive or slave, and baby girl will not forget.

Then I got sick , I got bad sick , one morning I got up and I was in the bathroom choking and I coughed uo this black stuff which was dead blood. so I grabbed my blackberry and I dialed 911. That was the last thing I remember. Seven days later I woke and I was in ICU I had 6 bleeding ulcers, and by this time 3 blood transfusions.

Bea would come and visit me everyday , except for the last week I was in. I spent 31 days in the hospital. On the day I was released I called and all I got was voice mail.
I actually called an escort service because I had to have someone sign me out. I did not have my cell phone so I had no one to call. This hooker looking bitch came up and asked for me, and off I went.
A cab waiting down stairs, I paid the girl a 100 bucks and I fell in the front seat.
Once home the cab driver whom I knew had to help me up the stairs, because I was to weak to walk.
He unlocked the door and when it opened everything was gone. no couch, no TV, no dishes, no bed nothing.

I was not mad or upset, because I knew why she left the way she did, but she took the fucking bed.

It was some 6 months before I was back to normal. My landlord and his wife would bring food over daily.
They furnished the apartment for me. It was some three weeks before I was able to go back to work, and then I was only able to work 4 or 5 hrs a day.

My website had been shut down, well my merchant shut it down , during the month of December I had over 10.000 dollars in charge backs. Shrugs

Today life is good I am in a good place. We all learn from our mistakes. The only bad mistake is the mistake you repeat.

protocols

slaveleash1

Vile

Guest Blogger Today. Husband Abuse vs. submission

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Advice, Argue, bdsm, controlling, Disrespect, Divorce, Domestic Abuse, married, Safe and Sane, self confidence, Submission, submissive, Submissive being used with tags , , , on July 9, 2014 by thekinkyworldofvile

You know in two years since the start of Thekinkyworldofvile , I have never had a guest blogger, the truth is I had never really given it much thought.

Much of my blog is about abuse,I am against any type of abuse be it verbal, physical, or mental, and yes to the almighty married men who cannot run their own home.

Recently My dear friend Franco Bolli here on wordpress and several other men brought up the subject about men being abused , and I have witnessed it first hand but never gave it much thought..

I was in the car business I worked as a salesman, and now that I look back on the last couple of years.
I was selling a Dodge Ram Pickup to a man , he was like 10k upside down, looking at a 47.000 truck. Well I said what kind of payments are you looking at ?
He then said I want the truck for 38.000 out the door, god I hate stupid people. So where did you come up with that number ? He said that is just a number I had in my head. I said well I am guessing there are more numbers in your head somewhere.
So I asked do you have a payment goal ? Yes I do 450 a month. so I said even if I could do 38.000 out the door, if you divide 38.000 by 72, that is about 527 a month and you have not even added interest.
So I get up I go into the tower and I come back and I sit down. Okay your truck is worth 29500 and you still owe 39000.
Well Kelly Blue book says its worth 36000, I said fine call kelly blue book and get them to cut you a check.
so when it was all said and done, his payments were going to be around 850 a month.

His wife blew the fuck up. I told you, you stupid mother fucker, you are so fucking ignorant, I never should of married you, it went on and on and on, then she slapped him in the head.
So he comes back in and says hey I am sorry my wife blows up every now and then. I was like man don’t tell me your sorry, your the one sleeping with her.
That was something that happened often, and I just shake my head.

So anyway Mel contacted me and told me what she had witnessed first hand, and that she had written a story about it. So I asked her if she would like to be a guest Blogger, I am not sure where that came from, but hey it is a good idea.
Here is her wordpress a lot of interesting things, you will enjoy.

http://pushingourlimits.wordpress.com/tag/pussy-spanking/

Yea I started off on the page about pussy spanking, so enjoy.

Husband Abuse vs. submission

I witnessed an arguement between a couple recently in the grocery store parking lot. With my son.

They were in the space next to the one I chose with their windows rolled down, and I was unfortunate enough to hear some of the worst verbal abuse I’ve ever heard. If I’d still been in the drivers seat when I heard it, I would’ve started my car and moved spaces. Though, it was a great teaching moment for my little man.

As we were walking in, the man got out of the car, calling the woman a few bad names, and slamming the door. He then stood outside of the car, hitting the roof and roaring, wordlessly at her.

There were plenty of other patrons staring, and as I ushered my almost first grader into the store, I felt so sorry… Not for that woman, but for him. And for all of the other people around me who didn’t understand the REAL abuse that happened prior to his outburst.

Before his shouting and her tears, before almost anyone noticed them, that woman beat down her man with the vicious skill of a practiced abuser. She pummeled him with quiet, but scathing words until he simply could not sit and take it any longer.

When I opened my car door, I heard her say she was glad she’d cheated on him and that she would do it again. Since he wouldn’t fuck her, she found someone who would. Then, methodically, she went over all the reasons he deserved it. She jabbed him about his weight, seared him about his job, mocked him for his social skills, and just before we were out of earshot, she harassed him again about his lack of desire for her.

The man was not more than a few pounds overweight, and honestly, I was surprised when I saw her inside later, because she truly had no room to comment on his weight. They were in a very new car and both had on lovely clothes, so I cannot imagine his job was that terrible. I can’t attest to his social skills, but I’m quite sure that any social awkwardness he had was only amplified by her negativity.

And I certainly could understand not wanting to get intimate with a woman who emasculates you constantly.

Honestly, I can’t imagine this was a random occurrence. He followed her around the store looking like a beaten puppy. And while it sickens me that any man would put up with that, I also feel sorry for him. Because it truly is a form of abuse.

I know women do this. I know they believe they are justified in tearing their men apart because they aren’t perfect. I understand the draw to hurt the person whose inability to meet her needs, hurts her. Calling him names, showing him all the ways he fails, listing all the things he is already insecure about… In an effort to prove to him that he needs to change… Never once thinking about the damage these insults cause and how they never work to improve or enlighten…

It is so sad.

Yes, men do the same. And it’s considered verbal or mental abuse. But, for some reason, it is rarely considered abuse when women do it.

She’s a nag. She just complaining. She belittles him, but it’s ok, because she does it under the guise of wanting to help him. Or the worst, he deserves it.

People feel sorry for her.

And so this man gets the double whammy of not only being abused, but is looked upon as the abuser.

I’ve been guilty of emasculating my man in this way. I’m not a horrible nag, in fact, I’m really easy to please and demand very little. But, at the beginning of this journey toward submission, I basically dropped my unhappiness in my husband’s lap and told him to fix it. I believed he needed to change and laid responsibility on him to do so.

I recognized, after a lifetime of denying it, that I truly wanted my husband to rule our home, including my life and body. I no longer had any desire to lead, and felt that he should simply grab the reins.

Had I not spent a decade taking away every decision and bending him to MY will, he may have easily done so. I recognize the irony in my own arrogance, that I could somehow dominate him into dominating me. I realize how little I actually understood about my OWN submissive desires back then. I see how it must’ve felt and sounded to a man who was happy with his marriage and life, and honestly did not have a clue that his wife wasn’t.

When he couldn’t or wouldn’t “step up” and “take over”, I belittled him to no end… just not to his face. On my blog, in my mind, to his mother, my sisters, anyone who would listen. And though I struggle to use my voice with him directly, that is all still a form of abuse. Surely, he could feel that venom of my resentment, even if I never openly spoke those biting words to him. It was certainly present in my attitude and demeanor.

Then, some things changed this year. I enjoyed a clear glimpse of what praise, adoration and respect could do for a man. I find it easy to build people up, and wondered what would happen if I tried to do that with my husband. Would he respond the same as others have? Could I set aside my expectation and just submit?

I’ve read a lot about marriage, submission and ridding oneself of resentment (cited at the bottom of this post). I’ve pushed myself to communicate more (though I’m still horrible at it). I’ve gained clear perspective of how my submission actually enhances my husband’s natural dominance. I work every day to take what he says literally and never over-analyze his actions (he’s a simple man, he says what he means and does what he says).

I no longer feel unloved, unwanted or unimportant. He is stronger and much more in control. He sees how it affects me which only feeds it. He sees me. Like he’s never seen me before. Because I don’t hide behind “wearing the pants”. Because I need him him to wear them.

And he is. He is taking care of me.

Suddenly, my marriage feels safe and comfortable. No, it is not perfect. But it will probably take a long time to undo what I “trained” him to be. It is a process.

It is like healing abuse.

There are lots of ways women abuse men. Vile’s recent post about Gold Digging was a great example. My testimony above of the verbal abuse I witnessed is probably the most common. Some are far more subtle. But they cause pain or discomfort, and most are clearly intentional.

Withholding sex, denial of other basic needs, ignoring or refusing to communicate, intimidation, threatening false accusations, making false accusations… I could go on. Basically all the tools women use to control men, they are, in fact abusive. The fact that men “shouldn’t put up with that shit” doesn’t change that.

Women react to any sort of stress with fear, it is our predetermined go to emotional response. The matching male response is shame. And the two can feed off each other, creating stress upon stress, forever.

The interesting thing is, the fear response is easier to control. In my personal experience, and through the books I have read (which I will cite below), it is evident that when a women actively prevents herself from contributing to the stress that causes her husband (or any man) to feel shame, her own fear is dampened and sometimes eliminated.

We are sort of programmed to make others feel good, it’s in our chemical makeup, we get a hormonal high off of it. That high makes us feel safe. Even before there is any sort of response from our man.

When you abuse a man, contribute to his shame in any way, his chemical makeup responds with aggression. Abuse leads to abuse.

No abuse is acceptable.

But certainly, lashing out against your abuser is understandable.

In my opinion, I think a very solid majority of failing marriages could be saved by some level of submission by the wife. I know there are lots of relationships out there with a submissive husband and Dominant wife, and I don’t belittle those relationships at all, I know they work and those couples are very happy.

I’m simply using this equation because, in my research, our familial roles are set by our gender. Chemically, biologically and historically.

When a woman decides not to refuse her husband sex, praises him for his successes and achievements instead of demeaning him for his failures, respects his decision making abilities and even relies on them, consistently, and actively gives, pleases and appreciates, effectively submitting to his leadership, guidance and natural role as the “Head of Household”, these changes within her create significant changes within him.

I’m at the front of this process, deciding within the last two months to truly surrender to my husband, instead of expecting him to exert his dominance over me. It has been enlightening. My submission blooms within me, every day. And in turn, he has truly begun taking care of me. As I slather on the praise and adoration, the more he steps up to the plate.

I am a masochist and he is definitely no sadist, but the more I accept what he can offer, appreciate it and revel in it, he seems to delve just a bit deeper and push his own limits without the demands and pleading that I wasted the last year filling his mind with. (Though I do still beg a lot… just in a different context).

Submission means letting go of expectations. Submission means allowing your path to be carved out by someone else. Submission means handing over control.

Surrender means abandoning oneself completely. It’s not about you. It’s about him.

But trust me when I say, when you make it about him, he’ll make it about you… times 100.

Remember what I said about women being programmed to make others feel good? Well, when you succumb to that and do it regularly, his natural response will be taking care of YOU. That will become his top priority.

At least that is how it’s worked out for me, so far. And it is Really. Very. Nice.

The books that I’ve read and am reading that helped me figure out a lot of the things I discussed above:

The Surrendered Wife: A Practical Guide for Finding Intimacy, Passion and Peace with a Man
How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking about It
Becoming the Woman of His Dreams

Vile & Mel

argue