What your slave wants ?

Pretty simple answer yes? It should be but it can be pretty complex. It can be very little work or effort or it can be a career. Does that make sense?

Security would be on top of the list I would guess.

Maybe honesty? Someone who puts the slave first to include family? Someone who communicates ? someone

Someone who puts reachable goals in place? Someone who provides growth and structure in the slaves life?

Someone who is loyal? I have seen masters who have a slave and still cheat. So if your poly be upfront about it, if the slave says she is not, then move on.

Someone who is not abusive, to include verbal and physical. A man who beats a woman will always beat a woman. Tons of broken promises, over and over again. Anger issues has no place in a relationship M’s or not.

Appreciation? Appreciation goes a long way. I will at least once a day tell Arianna how much I appreciate her. This lets a slave know their services do not go unnoticed.

A slaves home

There are old school masters who will say, a slaves only needs are food, water, clothing and a roof over their head. I get it I really do and I understand their view. After all we are talking about property right?

I love and cherish Arianna, she is my best friend and let it be known my only friend. However when it comes time to play, she is a toy. I use for my pleasure. I have played for a couple of hours , just bondage, floggers , cuffs, fucking all three holes. Arianna has created her own safe word. FUCK and really loud.

I am sure I missed out on other things, but I just covered a few.

You as a master has to be willing to give more than you take. Don’t get me wrong, the slave is to serve and be used, but you can only take so much before you break.

So you want a cock sucker on demand. You want pussy or ass on demand, but you don’t want to take the time out to invest in what you have.

This is the honest truth, I know a Dom who over the past year has banged over a dozen women, maybe more. So you still have the same girl? Nope I moved on, she was not submissive enough.

All he talks about how there is a pandemic of women feminists. The female culture is running rampant with feminism.

I’m like really are you being serious? Then he starts showing me all these videos from YouTube about the take over of wild feminists. Totally brainwashed.

Your slave is not your mommy.

The first time Arianna came to my house, it was almost spotless. I clean up behind myself. Now laundry I dropped off and for another 15.00 she dropped it off at my front door. I cooked and washed dishes but I never made the bed. I never understood the need to do that.

The slave has the right to speak up, call a fucking time out.

You have the right to speak up.

Ohh gainfully employed, now that is a good one.

Well that is it for today, be safe and remember, no passwords, or bank information.

Vile

Have You Ever Met A Dom?

Now I am not a male basher but I speak my mind when it comes to abuse. Abuse does not have to be physical, it can be mental, it can be isolation and many other forms.

Have you ever met a dom at a Dennys and wanted to start your training in his car by sucking his dick? Telling you not to wear and panties or not to make eye contact?

The Dom has no control over you until you choose to submit. Until then you are just two people meeting to see if their might be some compatibility. You have to listen intently and ask plenty of questions. If there is something you do not understand ask again. The smart thing to do it to write it down, and ponder on it for a few days. Remember you do not have to give definite answers, after all it is your first meeting.

Many will try to claim you right then and there with a collar he picked up from petco. I am sure many of you have experienced the same thing.

Those of you who state you are submissive, at times a dom will tell you that you are a slave. The dom will spend a great deal of time convincing you of it. Most of you will give in but a few will Stand firm.

Ok so you agree to see each other again, now he will ask if you are talking to other doms. If you are he will direct you to stop. He will then ask for your passwords to your social media accounts. This is a sign of insecurity and trust, it is also a sign of power on his part. It now becomes a power trip, he now feels fully in charge. I can assure you, you are not the first nor will you be the last.

What you do need is his cell phone number, you need his address for sure and work number. It would also be advised to take a pic of his tag. What you are doing is protecting yourself, and letting him know you are watching him.

Also you need to let him know if you text you expect a reply within a hour or so.

It is unfortunate one has to take all these steps, but you need to protect yourself.

Again I am not bashing males but I am speaking from experience.

You the slave hold all the cards until you are ready to submit. The new Dom has one thing on his mind, and that is your mouth and pussy.

Never give your passwords unless the Dom is prepared to give you his. Never give your banking information, you could wake up broke. Someone who wants your password is a little insecure bitch.

Do you go braless? Do you wear skirts with no panties? Are you Bi? Are you Bi has to be the number one question. Are you poly? This is another question that comes up. If you are not poly then say so.

You have to stand firm and mean what you say. This lifestyle is more about compatibility. If you are not a masochist then don’t meet a sadist.

I would really like more likes and comments.

Thank you for stopping by

Vile

Pussy Rules The World

Recently trying to mentor someone and yes I stated I never would mentor again but I really thought the guy was serious. As it turned out he was not and only interested in how many times he could make a woman cum. Shaking my head thinking this is coming from a 59 year old man.

Pussy is easy to get , keeping it is where the work comes in, and while you guys think you are rocking the boat, chances are she cannot wait for you to bust your load so she can move on to more productive work.

Do not get me wrong I love pussy, the way it looks, smells and taste but most of all the way it feels sliding in but let me make one thing clear. Sex is on my terms and my terms only. I actually prefer head and on a average week , I am being serviced about eh maybe 8 hours or a little more. Lets face it there is nothing like a warm mouth sliding down a dick. Just as with men and all men claim they are the king of eating pussy but that is really another myth. Just like women sucking cock if they do not love it then eh we really get nothing out of it.  I can say though the worst blow job Ive ever had still felt pretty good.

Arianna bless her heart she tries so hard to make me cum but that has only happened with her twice I believe and when all said and done she looked like she just ran a marathon. It is nothing she is doing wrong because if you ever got your dick sucked by her you would beg for more. She has this way of rolling her tongue while going up and down each time is a new experience. She is a fucking machine and can squeeze your dick so hard its like a vice grip but and but again sex is on my terms. I fuck when and how I want just like playing. I tell her the equipment to get out but share nothing else about what I am going to do.

Arianna sleeps naked well because she is not allowed to wear clothes while home unless I approve and late at night the covers come off and there she is spread eagle, and my dick says hey lets hit it.

We agreed when we first negotiated our relationship that there would be no sharing, she made it clear she did not want to be shared with anyone and I agree and why? Remember the oral skills I talked about and the vice grip?

Well that seemed to change for just a short minuet and I will explain. I bought a used car and it needed some work done on it and I had a very good friend who spent hours working on the car and once finished I offered to pay him and he refused the money.

So talking with Arianna one night I brought up sharing again and explained why I was thinking about it and she agreed, she even stated he would really appreciate you giving as a gift. Well he fucked that up, we went away for a weekend the 4 of us him , his wife and the two of us. A real nice hotel on the beach near Tampa and all hell broke lose with the other two. They fought all night long and I was thinking well his loss.

I get asked all the time from those who are novice , do you share? About a week ago a dom I did not even know wanted to take her out to dinner, I was like really are you serious? What was he thinking you ask? Pussy his mind was focused on one thing pussy.

A submissive or slave watches every move, listens to every word and how you act in public and they take in all of this information? Why do you ask? I am glad you did because they are looking for a weakness and why do they look for a weakness?  There will come a time when you can be manipulated with the all mighty pussy and you will cave like a kid at a willy wonka chocolate factory. You would crawl naked through a mile of broken glass just to taste her.

When a Novice dominant or maybe even experienced what comes up first in conversation? What are your limits, do you wear skirts with no panties? The deal Breaker is are you Bi ? Is you are a submissive somehow this dude who just met you , he says you know what? I believe you are a slave I really do and you just listen with confusion.  The list goes on and on and if you are new to the lifestyle you are clueless.

I need all of your information, all of your passwords and banking information so I can take care of you, and you give it , you give everything. Some have commented here before when they woke up their bank accounts were empty.

When you first meet you the submissive , slave you are in control and why are you in control? One your mouth and two look between your legs, yes the pussy. Your pussy controls the outcome of the relationship, your mouth controls the outcome of the relationship.

So the guy I was going to share Arianna with asked me before what it would take to let me let him fuck her. I was joking but I said a 2018 Dodge Challenger RT with a real shaker hood. We were going to the dealership the next morning but his wife blew the fuck up. Would I have done that? I cannot say for sure but probably not..

The power of pussy.

 

 

Training A Slave To Fit Your Needs

You have to have great appreciation for your slave ,in a way you have to love and cherish probably more than your slave will love you. The slave in today’s world probably works a full time job , then comes home and another job begins. However the work at home is more than likely more intense once home than at work.

Depending on the master there is a breaking process, some are extreme while some not so much but you have to be able to bring out the humble that is within the slave. My philosophy is if you break it you gotta fix it.

I have mentioned in other post the importance of getting to know the slave, the importance of knowing the slave better than family and friends and better than the slave knows themselves.

Knowing who you are , how much control you want, how much responsibility  you want, and how much care. Are you strict ? Are you easy going? Are you looking to take full control of someones life? Are you more service orientated, into humiliation, pain?

While sex is not my main driver in a M’s relationship  it does play a part and sex has to be compatible. Both have to be on the same page and both have to talk about sexual needs before entering a relationship.

If you are going to put rules and protocols in place you need to follow through on a daily basis. If you are going to take full ownership there is no what I call downtime , while I do allow my slave to have days just so she can unwind , relax and clear her head, my days are much different. I have no what I call true friends , I do have friends but no one I can really confide in , maybe sit down for a couple of beers or have a in dept  conversation about training. One of the subjects I have been studying for sometime is hypnosis but this is only a me thing. I have practiced on my slave and have been successful there is really no one to talk to. In the community I know a great deal many people but talking to someone and having to worry about something getting out is not something I want to deal with. I actually spend more time speaking with what I do call friends who live overseas , yea I know weird but it works.

I was really young when my kink first came to light , maybe 13 or 14 with a girl my same age. I spoke about her probably seven years ago and I am going to correct what I called her. I called her the school whore but the word whore was really pretty bad so I am going to replace it with the word slut. Just because someone is a slut is not a bad thing , it just means they have a huge sex drive, maybe slut is a word that does not fit but anyway.

Beverley was the first girl I tied up , spanked fucked and face fucked, yea she talked so I did not date very much while in school but she was a regular hookup for several years. The more we saw each other the more extreme we were even to the point of fisting, and wow the first time my hand vanished deep inside her pussy wow! I remember once my hand was fully inside and opening it and feeling all around inside her pussy , it was just amazing.

So while I was kinky and I wanted to be in control , I had no idea what I was doing. At that time is was hunt , fuck and move on.

To the slave, why do you want to be a slave ? What was it that drew you to this lifestyle? Something you read , maybe talking to someone, a movie? What type a slave are you ? Are you more about service? Are you a slave but a masochist ? This is something you have to figure out to insure you find the right match because not one master is the same.

Questions that are seldom asked of the slave is about health , be it physical or the most important mental. Medications the slave is on and why they are on them and what they are for. You as a master are responsible for doing research and it should give you a greater understanding on just how far you can go when it comes to play and that being physical and mental to include pain. If you break it you may not be ale to fix it and you could find yourself answering questions to law enforcement.

As a slave you have to have a need not a want because if it is just a want then while you are training there will be some internal fighting and will case you to resist to a point or you may find you are objecting to most.

Being mentally prepared having your mind right knowing you are about to step off a cliff and expect someone you trust to catch you.

The master must know the slave , the master must know the slave better than the slave knows themselves. You have to know the slaves limitations and something many look over are medications. What type of medications is the slave taking? Does the slave suffer from any type of depression? If so then this may alter your training program some. Remember if you break it you have to fix it and depression may not be something you can fix. I have found over the years those who do suffer from some type of depression are much better suited to be a service slave. Working with a masochist is this a area you have experience in?  The truth not many who are masochist are slaves just as not many who are sadist are actual master. Their pleasure comes from inflicting pain and humiliation.

Training a slave is really not as difficult as many think but it does take a lot of work and going into a relationship you really have to have a game plan. Some ask me about rules when they first meet a slave and my answer is you cannot give out rules until you know the slave. Rules are for the betterment of the slave and this does not include not being allowed to wear panties. I have found over the years that protocols can actually take the place of many rules although some see both as the same.

The one thing many look over is negotiating the relationship and if you do not it can cause a lot of confusion and trouble because you just cannot make shit up as you go.

I have standards when it comes to upkeep. I dress nice when out but I expect my slave to look 100 times better at all times. It is the masters responsibility on how the slave presents their selves when out. A slave is a direct reflection of the master and the masters training.

I had a list, a list of my needs when it comes to ownership and if the answer was no to anything on my list the conversation was over. The slaves needs are different, you have clothing, food, and a place to sleep anything else is a privilege and privileges can be earned or taken away.

Negotiations should include how much control the master wants to take, how much freedom to take and give. Sex is on your terms and your terms only after all it is about you the master. The slave must agree to your terms and speak the word I agree out loud not just by nodding. If you like anal sex and the slave does not and is not willing to compromise then the slave is not for you. If the slave does not swallow and it is a requirement for you , then the slave is not the right one for you. Do not give in to any of your needs.

The slave will come back with a list of needs besides the three basic. You the master must agree, if you say no and the slave does not agree then the slave is not the right one for you.

The slave has rights , the slave has the right to be able to communicate openly 24/7 to include waking you at night. The slave has the right to communicate freely without being judged and you the master must listen. This includes during your busy day, if the slaves sends a text you are to respond it only takes a few seconds.

A part time master cannot expect full time submission.

Ok you are taking a human and you are changing their train of thought, you are changing their habits, you are changing their needs. Needs in my eyes are four simple things. Food, water , clothing and a place to live. These are absolute needs

Training is about being consistent hourly, daily, weekly and monthly and so on. Once you begin the training there must be no interruptions. My thoughts on LDR these are extremely  hard because if you cannot reach out and touching someone you really do not have any control over someone, you have the control you are being told you have and nothing more..

You have a vision on how you see your daily life , you envision your home, you are the master , living with your slave. One thing, if you are looking for a slave then look for a slave. Your search should not include a submissive or a baby girl, a brat nor a switch. You are looking for a slave and nothing less.

One of the first words out of your mouth should be privilege. Everything you allow the slave to do or have is a privilege and privileges can be taken away at anytime. This is one area of the relationship the slave has control, privileges are in the slaves court and the slave controls the outcome.

You as the master having a clear game plan and knowing what your expectations are is a must. You can not just go in winging it or playing by ear. Once you start training it is really hard to make changes and this is mainly because you have already set the pace.

Strip, standing right there and strip as she walked through the door. Hand me you cell , your purse. In today’s the cell has become a part of life so allowing the slave to check a couple of times a day is important , maybe family friends, emails and so on but limited time.

You may sit here and here but not here or here. You are not allowed at anytime to sit on my furniture , you do not have that right. See what I did there? I have taking what once was normal freedoms and taken them away. Everything in a slaves life is a privilege and privileges  can be taken away at anytime.

Dinner time you may sit on the floor next to me , you do not have the right to sit on a chair, you are the slave remember? You will not begin to eat before I take my first bite,then and only then may you begin to eat and after the first bite you will thank me.

When you sit you will sit with both legs closed and hands placed on your lap, you will never cross your legs , you are not permitted to do so. When you stand and you are speaking or not your hands will be clasped in the front hanging in front of you.

You will ask permission to sit on my floor , you will ask permission to stand , to go to the bathroom , to get a drink or water , to shower and to enter the bed.

Here is the key as masters we can only make a informed decision based on the information given to us, if you do not communicate your feelings I cannot read your mind. If you ask a slave a direct question you expect a direct answer, if something goes wrong and the slave did not communicate the problem is clearly the slaves fault.

I have three main protocols in place while out. Protocol one, the slave may speak freely, two the slave may speak when spoken to and three speaking is not permitted.

My slave does not wear clothes while at home, she is not permitted  and does not have that right. If requested such as cooking or taking the dogs out I allow.

In the beginning of your relationship after you have agreed to enter one,  Use your slave this is your right. Guide the slave to the bedroom place them on the edge of the bed and tell them to spread. You fuck , bust a nut and walk away after you have finished. You and use often many times without saying a word. I have my slave trained I just tap on the back of the head and she knows it is time to suck dick, if I tap twice she knows to go all the way down and hold it until I grab a hand full of hair and pull her up.  If I want pussy I take pussy if I want the ass I take the ass but I do without giving any indication until I start.

All of the above is done in repetition , hourly, daily , weekly and so on.  You must remain consistent and what you have done over the past 90 days or so is changing the slaves mindset and taking old habits and replacing with habits you want in place. Just because a slave makes a mistake but not mean the slave should be punished after all the slave is human and even masters makes mistakes.  Punishments do not always include physical punishment. There is a mindset that if a slave breaks a rule which seldom happens then we must beat them.

The Collar is very sacred to me and I hold it above a wedding ring. The collar shows ownership , you own your slave , you own property. While negotiating find out what kind of collar would be suitable for everyday wear.

Myself I use a Turian collar  which for the most is Gorean and it locks with a allen screw. I am the only one with the wrench to remove it. Arianna has worn it for almost 7 years and it has never been off her neck. She wears to work and is out in public and in 7 years has been asked about it 3 or 4 times. She simply replies it is like a wedding ring and nothing else is said.

A collar is earned not giving , if it is just giving there is no appreciation

I do not believe in under consideration collars or training collars. I did make a leather one I put on Arianna when we went to events so others would know she was taking. Many today run down to the local pet store and purchase a dog collar and give it with no meaning. Most wear the collar as a trophy or to be able to stand out , maybe play.

Leave sex off the table until you get to know the slave, as a matter of fact let the slave bring the topic up when it comes to sex, kink and bondage as well as fetishes.

Shut up and listen

Start with a blank canvas and build what you need.

Fetlife you can find me

I_Vile_Own_Her

 

Vile

 

 

 

She is your Bitch why not man up ?

I had a friend who recently passed a very young age 49 years old. I had known him for several years and he had a habit of picking up a 20.00 hooker every week to suck his dick.  Now he did this because his wife refused to go down south and take care of business. She never knew what was going on until one day while over at his place him and I were talking in the kitchen and she had come home and decided to listen in on our conversation.  So I asked why do you pick up a 20.00 dollar crack whore to suck your dick when you have someone here to blow you. I mean really how fucking nasty is that a bitch who has not showered in day?

Oh then here she comes screaming at the top of her cock sucker yelling at me , yea me. Why are you yelling at me ? Your husband is the one picking up hookers because you wont blow him.

Most men are afraid to bring up any type of sexual needs when they first meet a female. This is the beginning of the end of the relationship and often the female will not bring up her sexual needs as well. These actions spell disaster and neither know it.

Back in the 90’s for a short time I went through a phase and I started dating older married women but there was a catch. There was no intercourse , while there was no fucking I did get my dick sucked a lot . The reason these women were reaching out is because they had approached their husbands about their kinky needs and many thought their wife was sick and even brought up counseling.

Now this is something I have never understood , you have a woman who is willing to do anything sexually with no questions and the husbands call them sick.

One woman I was seeing was the CEO of a large telecommunications company and her husband would only fuck her doggy style because he could not stand the look on her face while having sex. To make things worse sex was planned and put on his calendar and it was subject to change.

If you are dating someone and you are afraid to bring up your sexual needs in fear of losing a partner then they are not your match. Many men will cave in the hopes of just getting pussy. and many women cave for the security , yea a big difference there.

So women for the most are just looking for a few things , companionship , communication , which most men fail at and security. Women tend to blindly trust while the man who is cheating becomes possessive and often starts accusing the female of cheating when in fact it is the male who is cheating.

At one time I thought I could be poly and my slave and I had even tried a triad. The triad was successful for 3 years , everyone got along and I can point out one thing ,there was never any arguing. The problem was and still today my slave is very possessive but I knew that from the start. My reason for the triad was not sexual but more so for my slave and again nothing to do with sex but to be with someone who understood her. Today the three of us are still very good friends and will always be.

Okay so where am I going with this ? You find someone who meets your needs , friendship wise , communication  , having fun hanging together and then comes sex. While sex should never be at the top of the list it is still there. So I searched and found someone who could meet all of my needs. I was upfront from the start , I wanted sex on demand. I love having my dick sucked , many times at night while she is sleeping I will crawl on top bust a nut and get off and go back to sleep. I love anal sex to me it is the most private part and total submission again this is just how I feel.

My slave agreed to my terms , one thing I would like to point out is we entered our relationship as master and slave and we both negotiated our needs , well her needs but my needs and wants and in the end we both agreed.

In past relationships while I remained loyal I always looked and just had thoughts of what if. Today that is different because I have the full package and I know I have the best.

Today men cave like Christian Grey did in 50 shades when the two were negotiating their contract , he caved into almost every need and this is why most men cheat.

You can love someone and still think of her as your bitch , your slut , whore what ever you can think of but if you are not compatible you are a loser and you cant blame your partner because you were weak and remained silent. You might as well tattoo the word PUSSY on your forehead so everyone can see the real you. Then your work days become longer and you disappear on your days off because you are now cheating. Your cheating because you found someone who will take it up the ass because your wife will not but you knew this from the start. This makes you pathetic ,  this makes you a loser and you will get caught. If you have children what type of example are you setting for your children but many could careless and I have seen this happen.

When you meet not on the first date maybe not the second but sit down and have a heart to heart talk.

My ex wife told me onetime she was to tired to have sex. What the fuck are you talking about ? All you have to do is fucking lay there , I bust a nut and it is done.

Anyway peace out..

Vile

Total Slavery

As a young Dominant we dreamed of owning a slave , keeping them in a cage , feeding and using when ever we wanted. Although most never reached that dream for those who did I am sure reality kicked in finding it was not possible after all. Most young slaves just entering the lifestyle had this fantasy but once reality hit it turned into a nightmare .

Being able to maintain the strictness of what you dreamed at one time would be extremely difficult , this is due to time , life and working. Today it is almost impossible to have a one income home unless you are a billionaire but if you lived in a trailer you would be a creep. Then you have medical you have to worry about after all you agreed to take care of your slave right?

Love is a motherfucker and if not careful it can cause misjudgement and gilt will hit you. Once this happens you start to lose control. Once you have lost control there is no turning back. It is almost like a car out of control during a heavy rain.

The general public for the most looks down on our way of life , many see it as abuse and again  if you google BDSM you see porn , you see men and women being what it looks like abused.

How ever there are those who have the need to be under someones wing , someone who can guide them. Many professionals still today see being submissive a sickness. but if they would actually listen and not judge their thoughts might be different. Many say they understand but how can that be if they have never lived that role?

What type of master are you ? How much responsibility do you want to take on ? How much control do you want ?

Looking over some post on Fetlife got me to thinking , those who are having trouble finding a partner , but the real story is those who are seeking a lifestyle relationship are looking in the wrong places.

Times have changed and so have people some for the better but then you have those who feel entitled. Everything should be giving and nothing earned. If you are giving a car as a child you do not appreciate it as you would if you worked and paid for it out of your own pocket.

The one who will not go out with you is the one you are afraid to ask out. Most men stay clear in fear of rejection but rejection means nothing , their loss your gain. If you are going to Wally’s Bar and Grill on Friday night looking for the one then you need a different plan.

To be a slave , to be property has to be a need and not a want , if it is just a need then training will never be effective.

A friend of mine Malkinius wrote a book called ” I Can Do This ” and it is available on Amazon.

The book starts out with a slave wanting to be trained and the first thing that is done the slave is stripped of everything. Clothes , watch , purse and yes cell phone , everything is taking and the slave enters the house naked.

Putting the slave in their place is the first step and although you will take the phone you should allow time during the day to check email , text and so on but very limited time. You direct the slave around the house and point where they may and may not sit. It was over a year before my slave was allowed to sit on any of my furniture. At the dinner table she sat at my feet to eat dinner. This will include bath time , bed time, preparing your meals and coffee in the am if you drink coffee.

Your main objective as a master is to make your life as easy as possible but there is a catch and the catch is if you expect 100% from your slave you have to give back 150% at all times. The training must remain consistent , hourly and daily. You set rules and protocols but with the rules they have to be obtainable.

 

Behavior Modification

https://www.kinkly.com/definition/6612/behavior-modification

Behavior modification is a type of consensual domination practice that involves changing undesired behaviors into more desirable ones by using reinforcement or punishment. For example, a Dominant would use behavior modification techniques to encourage a submissive to use proper titles (like Sir or Madam) at all times.

Behavior Modification is something I have been very successful with using. While the slave goes through a transformation in many cases the changes are so small the slaves does not even know.

If you enter the relationship as a dominant or submissive , master and slave the transition is more obtainable and in most cases the transition is very smooth. If you are moving from lets say a daddy and baby girl to a D’s or M’s relationship I do not believe it is possible. I also want to add using this technique must be a need and not a want. The submissive has to want to be a submissive and the same with the slave.

Behavior Modification must also be consensual while the slave must have a idea of what it going to take place the slave must also consent to such changes. Such training if not meant to be long term can be damaging to the slave , I am speaking about the mental aspect of the modification.

While you explain what you are going to do you never give a reason , you the master does not have to explain yourself. While explaining something when finished ask if there are any questions , this is the time to make things clear but again you never have to explain yourself and do not allow such behavior.

Use and use often and the most effective way is to use without notice. If you want to fuck put the slave on their back , get it done and walk away. If you want your dick suck just walk up and put your dick in the slaves mouth. Again all of this is made clear before you enter the relationship , again the word consensual.

If you have anger problems you need to rethink your lifestyle , as a master you need to remain calm , cool and collective at all times. You are the master , the owner , why would you raise your voice or argue with your slave , think about that word , Slave.

It is funny you can ask someone for a good reason why two people would argue and no one can answer that question. Arguments stem from a lack of communication. You also need to let it be known you the master can only make a informed decision based on the information giving to you.  Many slaves come from broken relationships and they can even be making that transition from a vanilla relationship. The last thing the slave needs is to be yelled at or put down.

Egos if you have a ego problem you need to open the trash can and get rid of it. A ego has not place in a M’s relationship and will set you up to fail. You are no different from the guy next door , the only difference is your lifestyle. You are no better than the person who only makes 20K a year compared to your 100K a year.

The final word

Sit your potential slave down , explain what you need and want out of a slave and listen to the slaves needs. Make your expectations clear , make your goals clear for the short term and long term..

Check out my slaves blog

Life

Fetlife you can find me

 

https://fetlife.com/users/1322593

 

Vile

 

 

 

 

Imagine A Perfect World

Imagine a world without any problems , or imagine a world with the perfect partner , the perfect submissive , the perfect slave , is it possible ? Imagine having zero drama , imagine no arguing , imagine receiving perfect service with no complaints , again is it possible ? Absolutely it is and more but with all of these rewards comes a little work.

The submissive or slave you have chosen to serve you was born to serve just as you the Dominant , Master or Owner were born to lead . Little did we know it would lead us down the road of kink.

Just because you meet a slave does not mean the slave is meant to be with you. Both have to have somethings in common outside of the land of kink and service , if not kink will be the only thing you have in common and the relationship will be short lived.

Knowing the slave , knowing the slave inside and out is very important before taking that step.  You have to be able to form a relationship based on friendship first , then slowly introducing kink.

If you start with kink then you have nothing else to build on , making conversation hard , making communication hard and it makes it hard for the slave to communicate when the time comes.

Nothing comes easy , everything we have we all had to work for. In a relationship if we do not work for it , at some point and time it will fall apart. Any type of relationship requires regular maintenance , if we do not in the end it will fail.

Learning to communicate is not an easy task , we all know how to talk and hear but to be able to communicate and listen requires practice but most of all it is something you have to be passionate about.

The problem with most D’s or M’s relationships just starting , is the lack of compatibility. If either have a need or needs and you give one or more up during the negotiations , in the end you will not be happy. Just because you are submissive does not mean you have found the right Dom and you can reverse that as well. As humans it is a need to have a companion and at times we tend to settle for less knowing its not going to work.

Try to picture a perfect world , your own world , a world you have complete control over , then you add the perfect relationship and both are attainable.

Meeting leaving sex out of the conversation is a must , and while it is hard to do it will prevent you from reaching your goal.  Knowing who you are trying to form a relationship with is most important. The problem is most men see someone who is submissive as weak and that is far from the truth. Men are natural hunters , the hunt then the kill and its over you move to the next.

I cannot stress enough on how much training will make a difference. One of the first words out of a Doms mouth is I am going to train you , then nothing happens. Training is mental not just for the submissive but the dominant as well. The training you used on the last will not work with any future relationships. The personality’s are different , the needs are different and the structure needed.

Making your slave your number one priority , the slave comes first and yes before family and friends. The life you have always wanted is right in front of you but now there are things that will come to an end. The life you have always wanted is kneeling right before you , hands face up laying in lap. It is you who has made the decision to take ownership.

Molding the slave to fit your needs and wants can happen but as with any relationship you have to put work into it , but living a Master and slave relationship will be much different. While in a vanilla relationship you did not train your partner.

You are going to mold your slave , walking , talking , how the slave stands and sits , even when it comes to sex. You will control how the slave dresses if clothed , hair color and nails.

I have always been a firm believer to train a slave you have to be able to reach out and touch , be able to look into the slaves eyes , the eyes tell all , the eyes tell the truth. I have not seen to many LDR relationships really work. Although today you have email , text , face time , you are still not in 100% control. Again I did not say all , just from my experience.

During the negotiations you present your needs and wants . Since you have I would assume giving the two a great deal of thought then you should stick to your guns. Once you give up one need you have become fair game and you will lose other needs or wants.

When out at local events there are those who take notice. When out I have 3 protocols that are followed. 1 do not speak to anyone even if spoken to , 2 speak when spoken to and 3 you are free to speak and have fun. People take notice how the slave stands , sits , how one is dressed , hair makeup. My slave is a direct reflection of me and my training , and when out my slave dresses like she is walking the red carpet.

I do not have to explain myself when I maybe change a rule or add a protocol but my slave may ask for clarification.

You the Dominant can have the life you want but as with anything nothing is free.

Vile

 

 

 

My Soul Searching

Before meeting Arianna I was single for a little over two years , my you it was by choice. I had spent that time in doing some deep soul searching and I needed to find out a few things about myself. One who was I , I mean really I needed to know who I was in terms of the lifestyle. I cant remember back far enough when I had what you would call vanilla friends and my circle of friends in the lifestyle well I could count on one hand. There are reasons I keep my circle so small , one being if my circle is small and I am in contact with someone on a regular basis and I know I can turn to them ,  then I can consider them to be a friend. Even social media like Facebook or Fetlife I am not a friend collector , after all what is the point of having 2000 friends if you are never in contact with them?  Two I needed to find out what my needs were , what type of relationship did I need to have to keep the fire inside going ? Three what type of woman did I need in my life , was it a submissive ? Was it a Slave ? Or the last thing that popped in my head was she to be property ? There are clear differences between the three and each Dom or Master or owner differs as well , after all we are all different.

Knowing those three things before you enter a relationship is very vital when it comes to having any type of successful relationship but more so when it comes to our lifestyle.

Now during the 2,5 years I was single I did date and the dating process was so I could eliminate what I was not looking for and again I wanted a better Idea as to what I truly needed out of a partner…

One date I remember submissive saying I do not swallow , now sex was really down at the bottom of my list but to tell me you are not going to do something is a strike , and another no anal for me I get nothing out of it. It was obvious we had different out looks when it came to a relationship because it was not about her it was about me. I do not like bondage it does nothing for me , another I do not like humiliation it takes me to a bad place , the list went on and on. So at the end of the dates I would pay for the dinner and explain we were way to far apart to be able to come to any type of an agreement when it comes to a relationship. You mean because I do not like anal you do not want a relationship ? You are 100% correct that would be a need for me and while anal is not at the top of my list I may at times go a month or so just ass fucking , but of course then I always want to finish in the mouth. ATM is my favorite word..

Being a Dominant just did not fit me , this is mainly because a submissive has the right to say no. Being a master there are still negotiations which meant something on my check list could be marked off , yes such as no anal , or no sex when I dont feel like it or I am to tired. Tired really ? All you have to do is lay on your back I bust a nut and get up and you can go back to being tired.  I am to tired what the fuck does that mean ?

I wanted the word NO wiped from ones vocabulary , I cant , I wont. I wanted and needed full control over someones life, I would be responsible for taking care of everything , I would meet ones needs but then I expected my needs and wants to be completed again after all it was about me.

First entering the lifestyle the first slave I met was a total Masochist and needed humiliation just to survive , now how awesome was that ? Well one would think they struck gold but in time I found the Humiliation to be difficult because each time I had to out do the last. The pain part I learned where I could hit and where I could no that my friends is very important because you can really fuck someone up and try explaining that to a Judge. Sherrie wanted a relationship but I did not and while we dated for almost seven years I never not one time fucked her , yea that is the truth. Now she did however suck a lot of dick and I mean a lot but I never fucked her. I did fist her pussy and ass she really got off on that. I would stop by her work and insert a coke can and come back several hours later so I could take it out.  Driving down Hwy 95 in Daytona one time we were pulled over , and I am thinking what the fuck. Sherrie was sitting in the passenger seat butt ass naked holding a huge ass dildo. So the cop walks up and looks in the car and I am thinking this is not going to be good. He simply asked if everything was ok and Sherrie said yes. She was giving a ticket because her tag had expired. The cop never said anything about her being naked , I am guessing the size of the dildo did shock him because it took two hands to hold it.

Years and years past since the late 80’s and while I thought all of my relationships were on spot they were not and each one failed because of me. They failed because I was not willing to commit the time needed and it was pretty much one sided , which now it is pretty much one sided but what makes it different now is I give back , on my terms..

Now you are thinking the kind of relationship you want is impossible. You would never find a slave who would just submit to your every need right ? The key word is patience , good things come to those who wait and most of the time just like my now relationship Arianna fell right into my lap out of the sky. Speaking to a Dom one night and him and I are pretty close with our thoughts when it comes to ownership , anyway we were talking after a MAsT meeting one night and he stated I was lucky and just like I thought he said it was like Arianna fell from the sky as a gift.

I have been very blessed over the past 6 years and knowing many more years to come is more of a blessing. I am also blessed to live with not one but two women Arianna my slave and Lynn our submissive. Arianna completed most of Lynns training taking a huge weight off of my shoulders. Our house runs smoothly and without a glitch , both girls get along with each other.  There is zero Drama and zero problems yea sometimes I cannot believe how smoothly things are going.

Negotiating our relationship was really pretty easy it was my way or no way. I was straight forward and to the point. The thing that blew my mind was Arianna said one word, Okay. That threw me off for a few minutes but I did not show it. Arianna then explained her needs , now in order for me to get what I want I knew I had to give back and her one and only request was to be micromanaged. This was a area I had zero experience in , even asking others in the lifestyle I was told it was way to much work let her go..

Remember the slave must adapt to your way of living , your life , your needs and your training.

Training is something I take very serious and I put a lot of thought into it. What worked for the last slave will not work with a new one. The rules are different , their personality is different , their mindset is different and of course needs. If all the needs are met there are no wants.

I asked the question several times are you sure ? Are you sure this is the path you want to take? Each time the answer was yes and so our journey began.

I am more of a Mental Owner , in order to control someone you need to be in their head , you need to know what makes them think the way they do , their habits , why they have those habits. You have to know their reasoning , now that part is deep. You have to know what makes them think the way they do. Once you are inside as confusing as it may be you are now in full control. The hard part is knowing what to do , when and why. If you fuck something up you gotta fix it so be careful.

What I do in a sense is strip one of ones dignity , I take everything away that was a need and turn them into privileges. I took all clothes away including when company came over , again depending who it was. I took all furniture away including being able to sit at the dinner table. I controlled shower time , bed time , food that was prepared. I controlled hair color , nail polish and I controlled what clothes would be worn outside when we did go out.  I controlled the way she sat , how she spoke and who she spoke to. I used her and used often. I used without a word , I used every hole , I let her know I was taking what was mine.  The slave is yours , your property , you own after all they gave you that right. Use and use how you want and when you want. While I am not a huge fan of Humiliation I do use some form during my training , again this is to reinforce our positions within the home.

Breaking a rule must be a serious offense , the slave forgot to text this is part of training. There is no reason to go off the handle. Training is about changing habits and depending on who you are working with you are looking at 90 days or more before most things catch on. We as owners must show patience.

Keeping that mindset , putting protocols in place and staying on top of the protocols , ownership is not a 9 to 5 job. As Dominants , Masters and Owners we must be available to our partners 24/7 no questions asked.

The one weakness that can kill a M’s relationship is when the Master feels guilty about punishing , or slips and does not stay on top of things , begins to let rules go without consequences. Once you change and your property has seen the difference it is impossible to turn back the pages.

The words I wish I was a better Dom or a better Master , I am sorry I am a failure. Think about those words yea pretty pathetic and your property may not say anything but the same thoughts are there. There are thoughts you keep to yourself , it is actions and words you share. The property looks up to us , not only for a relationship but guidance , direction and depends on us to keeps the rules we have put in placed enforced..

I had thought about Blogging about feminism but as stated above I will leave that as a thought..

Vile

Communication

I Am A Dominant Call Me Sir

You are new to the lifestyle and very excited to learn everything you can but most of all finding the One. I hope that you would talk to many but chances are you will end up speaking with only 2 or 3 before taking that leap.. After only chatting for a short time you are giving a direction to call the one you met Sir.

I firmly believe in the lifestyle we need titles , we need titles to identify ourselves when it comes to meeting others. It explains our position in the lifestyle , maybe a Daddy , a Dominant a Master and so on. In the end it is our property who addresses our identity.

Speaking with someone a couple of months ago who is somewhat new to the lifestyle , he had asked me if I could introduce him to a submissive. Being new Dominant in our community can be somewhat tough because there is a vetting process we all go through. I was told by this new Dominant that he was displeased with the vetting process and thought it was not fair. I sent information one being bestslavetraining.com a huge source of information and the other of course my blog here although most is just my opinion but my opinion is based on more than 20 years experience. You do not have to agree with everything but I am sure there are parts you can take and put to use.

So I introduce the Dom to a submissive a very good friend and at first everything seemed to be going well but it soon fell apart. One was the work schedules but my thoughts are if you want something to work it can work if you are willing to make the effort. Once the frenzy fizzled out he lost interest. I asked if he had read the material and he stated he looked over it but was more worried about his own well being , so in short no he did not. I sent it again and received the same answer so I see this as not wanting to put any effort into learning. I also made the point that it was very important to get out in the local community , you cannot just sit at home and hope someone will just walk up to your front door and drop to their knees.

The truth is you are in full control for the most until you decide to submit. The Dominant may make request but it is you who has the final say. You have the right to question , you have the right to avoid any situation that may make you feel uncomfortable.

What do you want me to call you ? You will address me as Sir! By now you may have formed some type of rapport but not near enough for you to have gained enough respect to call someone Sir , unless you were brought up in such a way and just being polite. One who makes such demands again have severe ego and security issues.

Here is the problem , most not all who are new to the lifestyle want to learn but they want to learn on their terms. When a relationship fails the blame goes to the submissive and not the one who is truly at fault.

Things have changes , people have changed but most of all the lifestyle has changed. The new Dominants entering the lifestyle wants the cake and ice cream but do not want to put in the effort.

Recently mentoring someone for a very short time , I found this to be true. What I found disturbing is wanting me to introduce him to someone.  Introducing a Dominant with no experience , nor the wish or need to learn placed me in a very bad place. So I decided to give it a try and I knew someone who I thought might have some compatibility , this ended to be a huge mistake.

You cannot start off on the right foot when one starts off making demands. You cannot start a relationship when a 100 rules stuffed down your throat.  One may be able to start off with a few small rules such as bed time or texting ,  but to hand you a book of rules without even knowing you is insane.

Remember rules are strictly for the betterment of the slave. If it starts out with you having to send naked pics or videos then you should just move the fuck on..

Stay calm and think logical and your way of life will come..

Much Love

Vile

 

Submission

What better way to start out than a definition from wikipedia ?

A 1985 study suggests that about 30% of participants in BDSM activities are females.^[1][2] A 1995 study indicates that 89% of heterosexual females who are active in BDSM expressed a preference for a submissive-recipient role in sexual bondage, suggesting also a preference for a dominant male, and 71% of heterosexual males preferred a dominant-initiator role

Female submission describes an activity or relationship in which a female submits to the dominance of a sexual partner. The submission can be voluntary and consensual. The dominant partner is usually a man, but can also be another woman, or there can be multiple dominant partners simultaneously. The term female submission most commonly refers to a woman who derives sexual pleasure or emotional gratification from relinquishing (to varying degrees) control to (as well as satisfying) a trusted dominant partner.

I like this.

Submission may be manifested in a multitude of ways whereby a woman relinquishes sexual or personal control to another, such as acts of servitude, submission to humiliation or punishment such as erotic spanking, or other activities, at times in association with bondage. Female submission can take the form of engaging in sexual activity with a person other than her normal partner, as in the case of swinging (sometimes called wife swapping) or prostitution. The level and type of submission can vary from person to person, and from one time to another. Some women choose to include occasional sexual submission in an otherwise conventional sex life. For example, a woman may adopt a submissive role during a sexual activity to overcome a sexual inhibition she may have. A woman may choose to submit full-time, becoming a lifestyle slave.

Where did your journey begin ? Most will say at a very young age , while others are hit later in life , maybe a life changing event , a thought , words someone speaks or maybe you stumbled across a website and you were intrigued. Growing up submissive can at times be confusing because you know you are different but you just cannot figure it out. You may go through your life and never learn the definition of who and what you are. However you do know you enjoy service, you enjoy giving up control , you enjoy letting others take the lead. Someone will say at a young age there where thoughts of older men , or being kidnapped and used. I am not sure if all have these thoughts or just those who are submissive.

In our lifestyle there are a great number who suffer from depression , I have no data this is just from my experience in the lifestyle. I am not sure how the two are connected or if they are at all. Some are willing to share with others in the lifestyle while some keep things to themselves. So this is where the importance of finding the right Dominant , one who understands you and is willing to take the lead and guide.

Depression is not the end even for those who are Dominant , although in the past I have made statements to the contrary. With the right medications and the right submissive things can run smoothly. The problem would be a submissive who is combative , has a short fuse when it comes to temper , not following rules but most argumentative. Many Dominants though will hang on with the fear of losing a partner , the fear of being alone. The greatest fear when it comes to being human is the fear of loss , be it material , or a partner.

The good is you get pleasure by serving , helping others completing task on time and the rewards of being a good girl.

The bad , you are with someone who does not understand you , nor have they ever heard the word submissive or slave , submission. What they see is someone who is weak , someone who will stand and take verbal abuse and at times physical abuse , but after all is said and done you still stand tall and proud.

Some who are submissive not all but some do not really enjoy sex , what they do enjoy is knowing they have pleased. This is where their greatest pleasure comes from. Now do I have any data ? Absolutely not , I am just speaking from my own experiences in the lifestyle. When I meet someone I drill their mind , I want to know more about them than they know their own self. The knowing you have pleased someone , makes sex enjoyable , it makes you feel needed and cared for. You are willing to do things you never even thought of or maybe thought you would never do such things but you do because you have this deep desire to please.

Over the years the different roles have come to light , it is no longer just submissive , slave or dominant or master.  The daddy dom , the daddy dom master , then the master .The baby girl , the little ,Submissive , slave  and the list goes on and one so finding the right partner , someone who understands you is most important. We as humans by nature have to have companionship we need to be with someone even if that someone is wrong , not the right fit but they are filling that hunger for the time being.

How much are you willing to give up ? How much freedom are you willing to give up? Are you going to follow rules and rituals? Are you going to allow someone to take full control? Maybe you need more but your Dom is only dominant in the bedroom and you are more of a 24/7 how would that work ? Are you willing to compromise your needs for a little companionship?

What type of submissive are you? What type of dominant are you looking for ? We are all different , we all have different needs , we all have different taste , we all have different goals.

One of the biggest myths you will hear is a submissive does not have the right to say no. That is a outright lie. You as a submissive determine how much you will give , when you will give and how and where. Remember you are a submissive not a slave but the truth is even a slave can say no if they feel like they are in danger. There is also a on off switch and many times it confuses the dominant. Once you have had enough and you are done the word no will just flow.  Once you are done you are done , the feeling of being submissive for that time just goes away.

There is a difference between fantasy and reality knowing the difference before entering a relationship. Take your time and speak with other who are submissive , stay clear of dominants , but find out what others are thinking and doing. If you do not take the proper steps you could find yourself in a world of hurt.

How do you see yourself ? How do you envision your life? What are your goals?

Meeting a new Dominant you the submissive , the slave are in complete control until you feel the time is right to enter a relationship. You should be his number one priority , you should come first no matter what. If you go a day without hearing from him , you give your first warning. This kind of behavior is not acceptable and will not be tolerated , the second time it happens you drop him like a bad habit, there is no strike three. How long does it take to answer a text? How long does it take to drop a email?

Vile