Archive for the Punishment Category

She Is Your Bitch Run Your House

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, adapting, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Relationships, Behavior Modification, Consistency, Master And Slave, Punishment, Slave, Submission, Submissive, training your slave with tags , , , on March 26, 2018 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have had a few Dominants approach me , telling me that they let their feelings get in the way. When it comes to control , punishing or even giving out task , the biggest is when it comes to enforcing rules. The feeling of guilt like you are abusing someone , mistreating , being unfair , being to strict. Well! You did not have these feelings before you entered the relationship ,or when you both agreed to enter the relationship , you had everything planned out right ? You told the Submissive you were a dominant , you told her you wanted to take control , you gave out rules right?

Many over time begin to get this deep sense of guilt , like everything is abuse , maybe mistreating their partner but remember these are thing that were agreed on before you entered the relationship , so was it just Dom frenzy or maybe just a deep fantasy and instead.

When you both sit down and start talking about each others needs and most important what they Dominant lays out about how he envisions how the house will be ran. It is okay as a slave or submissive to express your feelings but to be outright argumentative is nothing more than disrespect and should not be tolerated. When should you question your Master ? When you see a bad decision  is going to affect you and your house , put you in danger or possibly homeless. This should include while out in public , if you have something to say it should be in private , calling your Master out in public is nothing more than being disrespectful. If there are no consequences to ones actions then the Master is no longer in control.

Neither Master or slave should be afraid to speak up , if you do not communicate the slave in a respectful manner the Master has no way of knowing what you are thinking or what problems you may have until you the slave blows up.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master”, whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Keeping that head space , one the collar if you the slave should ever have a doubt about your position in the home then reach up and grab your collar , if your Master requires you to wear one. It seems today very few Master require a collar for what ever reason , maybe he does not want to spend the money on one or he simply does not care. Putting rituals and protocols in place. Putting things in place even slave positions keeps the head space and is a reminder. Everything put in place has to be consistent or they will not work.

http://www.bdsmwiki.info/Protocol

A protocol is any defined, enforced code of behavior, and or rituals whether it be within the confines of a particular group, community, or other interpersonal dynamic (such as a power exchange relationship).

Protocols are a set of governing rules that dictate the body, behavior and attitudes through an enforced code of behavior and/or rituals whether it be within the confines of a particular group, community, or interpersonal dynamic.

Protocols are often referred to those found within a power exchange relationship. The reason there is no set rules about universal protocols is because every power exchange relationship is different, not just based on relationship style, but more specifically on the individuals involved in the relationship and their needs and wants.

Best Practices indicate that it is unreasonable to expect that others should or must respect your particular set of protocols if you have not negotiated for such things with them.

Why would a Master argue with a slave ? What sense does it make for either to even argue with each other? If a Master will argue with his slave then he becomes the bitch.

The Master

http://bdsmwiki.info/Master

Values , and this is interesting….

Some commonly emphasized values consistent with best practices concerning a Master may include but are not limited to: (in no particular order)

  • Honorable behavior in word and deed.
  • Is in touch with their wants and needs; gives clearly stated expectations, orders and instructions.
  • A clear understanding of their own personal limitations and failings while consistently seeking to learn more and better themselves.
  • The ability to respect and forgive the personal limitations and failings of those that serve them while still helping them push towards and achieve self betterment.
  • Possession of sound judgement, logic, reliability and the ability to keep their personal affairs in reasonable order.
  • An amazing degree of control of temper and impulse.
  • Recognizes both service and Mastery as callings worthy of respect.

You set the rules , you sit the rules and protocols and you enforce consistently ,  Your house you the Master sets up how things will be ran. Many at sometime will begin to feel guilty about enforcing rules or afraid of rejection , or maybe even your slave will leave you. It is the slave who has to adapt to your way of living.

You cannot change up the rules after you have put them in place , rules can be amended but there are some who will change just so they can punish.

Keeping that head space , protocols and rituals along with a few slave positions , all of these not only induce good behavior but they are a training tool. Having to ask permission to do anything and everything even when it comes to scheduling a free day with family or friends.

Use your property and use on a regular basis , the slave is there for your use , your enjoyment and it is up to you if you let your slave get off. Play and do not share what you plan on doing but it is good to give warnings throughout the week. Take what you want when you want and how you want , this will also keep your slave in that head space.

A good Master shows control , not only at home but while out it is the Master who sets the example. The way your slave acts in public is a direct reflection of your training.

Do not make demands that are not reasonable , do not make demands that will set the slave up for failure. Do not make demands that would cause the slave harm or get into trouble.

Positive reinforcement goes along way , several times a week I tell my girls how much I appreciate them and the things they do. Reward when the slave does something good. The system put in place should be everything is earned nothing is giving. All of the privileges are just that privileges and anything can be taken back.

Restrict the space with in the home the slave is allowed to sit and the way the slave sits. While out my girls sit with hands in lap and are prohibited from crossing their legs. While standing the hands are clasped in front. All of these are reminders of the slaves position within the home.

The Master needs down time a time to relax clear your head , time alone , this is just as important as the slave having down time..

You can change plans when they are not working but never change goals.

 

Why I Love Micromanagement

Posted in bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Dominant, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, Micromanagement, Punishment, Slave, Submission, submissive with tags , , on March 21, 2018 by thekinkyworldofvile

My first experience with micromanagement was when I first met Arianna , this was the first time that subject had ever been brought up , well I had been around other Doms who brought it up but I never gave it much thought…

There are two different types of people who use Micromanagement , those who are total fuck heads at work and need that control to make it through the day , and those who need that control in their home and environment if that makes sense.

Micromanaging someone does not mean they are weak , it does not mean they do not have a brain , it does not mean they cannot function , it means the slave wants to give up total control and say. Some find peace within giving up total control in the right hands. Some are able to be who and what they are giving up total control , notice I said some.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master”, whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.

If we are single not that I like titles or I need one but being single we take on that Dominant role. We are in search or a slave not a submissive , I myself would not and I refused to settle for less. Many times it is our human nature to settle for less just for that security , the security of being but not getting our needs met and it is short lived very short lived. Many times we enter a relationship under false hopes words that were spoken but not followed through with.

Many not all but many will become needy many will become codependent and there is nothing wrong with either it just adds more responsibility . To some it may seem like a dreadful task but if you truly care it will go unnoticed.

If you are going to be a Master you cannot pick and choose what part of the relationship you want. You want the slave to give 100% and in return you must give 150% that just kinda evens things out on a level playing field.

You the Master hast o be willing to take the good with the bad , in the right frame of mind and again if you care enough there is no bad , there are just areas that needs a little improvement.

Before entering the relationship the slave has to be in the right frame of mind. The slave has to know what they need in a relationship. The slave must be willing to give up total control. The slave must be willing to follow and never question. There is a exception to that rule, if a Master is about to do something that is not in the best interest of the home then the slave should be allowed to speak up…

Something you hear of often is when a slave has a question or has the need to voice their opinion the Master shows anger or begins to yell , thus causing the slave to go silent. Anger is not a good trait , not being able to control anger is not a good trait, not allowing communication is not a good trait.

I am in full control of not only my life but my surroundings , I am the one who has to answer to any mistakes that are made. I make decisions for 3 now so anything I do affects all.

I still allow freedom , time off , time off to relax , clear the mind , go out with friends and family , those two are most important. Allowing your slave to relax , go out with friends and family , have fun being able to let their guard down. A Slave needs down time, time to relax , time to unwind , time to clear their head.

In the beginning it is very important to explain everything in great detail , what is expected and what will not be tolerated , but most important there are consequences to their choices.

Plan everything is pre-planned , both girls have a calendar and the entire month is planned with my approval and only I can approve any changes. The only way any changes can occur is if I decide I want to do something.

I myself am held accountable for my actions and decisions , if something goes wrong I have to explain why I made such a bad decision.

Before meeting Arianna , I had never even thought of micromanagement , at that time it did seem like way to much work , but I have come to realize it does make life run so much smoother.

Nudity , I am a firm believer in keeping my property nude while at home , this is a tool I use as a reminder , while I myself stay dressed. Nudity is a reminder of who they are and what their status is within the home.  There are at times with a request I may allow a shirt and panties , sometimes I may feel it is a bit chilly and I will give clothing as a option.

While I do make all decisions I do not have to explain why I made certain decisions although there are times I may elaborate if I feel something is not understood.

I hate repeating myself , I feel I am talking to adults and once I have explained everything and I ask if it is understood , then the conversation is over.

Punishment , I am against corporal punishment although it is not out of the question , it really depends on what the severity of what happened or what rule was broken. I feel sitting a adult down and speaking to them as if they were a child is way more effective. Another reason I do not like leaving marks on my property. I am proud of what I own and enjoy showing off to much.

Dressing ,  before going out I am presented with outfits and I pick what I feel will be appropriate. If we go out the girls look like a million dollars , they are a direct reflection of who I am and my training.

I have some 600 drafts I am working on..

Much Love

Vile

 

 

 

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, Arianna, Bad Dominant, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Online Relationships, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, Being A Dominant is 24/7 365, blow job, cock sucking, codependency, codependent, commitment, communication, consequences, Dominant and Submissive, Ego, Face Fucking, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Humiliation Training, Kink, Low Self Esteem, masochist, Master And Slave, Online Dominants, owned property, Owned Slave, Poly Triad, Private Protocol, Punishment, self confidence, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Total Submission with tags , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Sitting here listening to Bret Michael’s jamming with friends , and it fucking rocks. Music is a passion of mine , it is my release , it is my time to chill , gather my thoughts , enjoy my own little world.  Ted Nugent , KISS , Aerosmith , and some country at the top of my list Kid Rock. I love the cheesy kung fu movies that comes on Thursday nights. I am a huge news fanatic so if there is something you want to know just ask.

I am very laid back for the most , I have never raised my voice or lost my temper towards my property. This is not to say I am a push over because I am not , I speak my mind no matter where I am or who I am with.

I am a Buddhist , I have learned to channel my anger but as with any man or human there is a limit. At one time I had a very bad temper , I drank a lot , you could hand me a bunch of pills  and I would not even ask what they were I would just take them. I tried to smoke all the pot in the world but I failed. I would smoke and someone would just grow more. I was on a down hill spiral with not a care about tomorrow or the future.

A Dom who has a temper is not a Dom he is a abuser and nothing more. A man who hits a woman out of anger is a pussy because he will not hit anyone who will not fight back. A Dom who will not allow you to ask questions and want answers is not a Dom. A Dom who does not allow open communication is not a Dom…

However that road of destruction ended around November 1986. October and November I lost my first two jobs after my exit from the US Army. I went cold turkey I stopped everything at one time not looking back… I thought for sure I would of had some type of withdraws but that was not the case, however I did lose most of my friends or I assumed they were friends…

At this time I was living in a small town called canton Ga. It had changed a lot being gone for ten years. Most of the people I knew had moved or changed so much we no longer had anything in common…

My Dominance is a gift and I mean that. A gift means I am taking time out of my life and offering a gift. My gift I am setting my time and life to the side and offering you security , I am offering a sanctuary of peace no drama , no arguing . I am offering you respect , I am offering you me. I am offering you a open door 24/7 , I am offering you communication 24/7. I am offering you stability , I am offering you protection. I will allow you to grow and I will conform to your needs. I will take the time out of my life to train you to fit my needs. I will not take advantage of you , I will not mislead you , I will admit my mistakes. I will offer more than I take but most of all I will always put you first.

Wow! looking over the list and it could of continued I am sure with enough thought. I just wanted to crack the door open and let people take a peak inside.

Both dominance and submission is a gift both have much to offer and prove. I am of course speaking of the beginning steps in a new relationship.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.

I am at a later date going to speak about our triad , we now live as three and while there could be some improvement things are really going well. My time training is limited due to my work but Arianna has stepped up to the plate and is offering guidance .

The Slave has a different mindset than a submissive. A submissive can and has the right to say NO. The submissive can impose limits on the relationship. The submissive can have the choice of when and when not to submit.

The word Slave , the word ownership , the word property. We all know owning a slave is not in any way legal but it is a mindset. The slave kneels holds her hands out and says I am yours to take and use.

You have to want it , you have to need and crave, it has to be in your blood. You have to live, dream and walk with this deep need and desire.

Arianna is a very unique Slave , during her training there was no rejection , there was no resistance, I could see in her eyes she had a hunger. To this day she continues to seek ways to submit more to give more. Everyday I grow with her everyday my respect grows. As my needs change Arianna conforms , but as she changes I conform to meet her needs.

Giving yourself without a thought having that feeling of being completely owned. Willing to be trained to fit someones needs and wants. Being used as a sexual object at the drop of a hat. You can be loved but in the end you are owned property.

Now I sit looking back over the years and thinking about the transformation , thinking about the growth. Watching someones habits change, watching needs change. More than willing to follow rules , protocols and understand there are consequences for her actions. To this day Arianna continues to search and find ways to submit more , she has that need, it is something she craves.

You the Slave must be in the right frame of mind and have a understanding what is about to take place. You must be willing to have over your mind and body and be willing to hand over complete control without question.

Are you Domestic more service orientated ? Are you just going to be used sexually ? Are you a Masochist used for pain? Or are you a mixture of all rolled into one?

You also must be giving a clear understanding what is expected of you , what your training will consist of , how long your training will be. You will want to know what the final goal is.

Trust is the main factor in building a Master / Slave relationship. The slave knowing once she or he agrees to the terms negotiated during the process.

You have to know most of your rights will be stripped away from you. You must know you and your body will be used , without warning. You will be taken when and how your Master chooses.

However and there is a however , you should still be allowed to see friends and family , a slave needs what I call down time. A time to relax and breath , to be able to clear the mind. A time to reflect on past and future.

We as Masters and Dominants take and we must give back more than we take. Probably two or three times a week I tell both Arianna and L that I really appreciate everything they both do. At time I do help out as well. On my days off I cook and at times I even jump in and do a few dishes.

A Slave is not your maid although the slave will be giving chores to do , A slave is not your mom. I pickup behind myself. If I use something I put it back. I do not demand dinner be done at a certain time, both know when I take lunch , If I am going to be late they eat before me.

Many just sit back and look for reasons to punish and my question is why? We can just sit back and find something wrong and the first thing that most grab is a belt or paddle.

Although I run a strict house punishing is something I do not look forward to, just as a parent feels bad for punishing a child.

We as humans , Masters and Dominants make mistakes maybe not on a daily basis but we do. Slaves and submissive’s make mistakes as well but nothing more could be more devastating known they have failed.

As with the 7 types of Submissives there are just as many slaves , but also there are just as many Dominants or Masters..

The service slave is more geared towards service , cleaning , cooking , and keeping things in order. Although sex does play a part service is their main goal. Just knowing their Master is pleased gives them pleasure.

The sex slave can be a little service orientated but is geared more at being used as a sex object , at times no holes barred. The sex slave gets off more knowing they have pleased than them getting off. Most sex slaves will conform to what pleases the Master and urge those actions more.

The Masochist in most cases is neither just as a full blown sadist. Very little structure , very few rules, it is all about the pain and the pleasure the sadist gets out of inflicting pain.

The all around slave a mixture of all of the above , a slave that needs a little of all , being used , in service and at times stepping up to take what pain is giving..

We as Master need to step up to the plate , owning one of the above takes a great deal of time and responsibility. We must make ourselves available 24/7. Arianna knows she can wake me at any time to talk.. We must give more than we take.

Being codependent does not make you broken , being needy does not make you broken , having a low self esteem does not make you broken in fact many times it makes you special.

I have heard many times I am broken or I am not worthy of having a Dominant or Master.

I myself prefer the needy part even the codependent , it is just knowing how to handle and being able to offer the care. Short term neither play out good if both sides are not ready to commit.

I have found very few Dominants or those who call themselves Masters who are truly willing to take any type of relationship serious or willing to take the responsibility needed.  These are the guys who hide behind the computer , the trolls who really have no clue. Once they find someone who is gullible enough it is short lived . The crazy rules the unrealistic demands , the confusion of changing rules just so they can punish.

Training is very time consuming just the initial training I am going to say 90 days with hands on contact on a daily basis. In order to be in control you have to be able to reach out and touch. Online training does not work , it works as long as the computer is on and you have 24/7 contact then it is still iffy.

You have to have need , the craving to be owned , the craving to be used , the craving to be called property. The craving to be able to hand yourself over completely.

The hardest part is the first 90 days it will tell you number one if you are just going through a frenzy or the life of a slave is not you….. It is easy to throw in the towel and give up , it takes a lot to stick it out , but if things are not what they seem , the raise the white flag and say I am done… No shame your just being true. I can assure you the Dominant you leave is not the last in the world.

I believe at times humiliation is needed , it is needed to bring someone back down to reality. It is meant to give a shock , kinda like sticker shock when looking at a new car. It brings someone ego back down to earth. Even during my relationship there are times I will use some form of humiliation to keep things in check , it puts them or reminds the slave of their place..

The word USE I use my property , I use my property for my pleasure , even during fucking I use the word USE , I love using you , I love fucking my property , I love fucking your ass. I like the little reminders..

We live a micromanaged relationship as most of you know. I control everything. I control hair color , I control the length , the nail polish , her clothes . I control the way she walks , talks. I control how she acts in public. I control bathroom , food , bedtime , shower , shaving. I receive a hourly check in 90% of the time with pictures. Both girls have a mileage book although I do not check it on a regular basis it is there if I have the urge to look. I have no passwords , I see no need mainly because I am secure enough in my relationship. However I will at times pick up the phones and strum through them.  If you as a Dominant has the need to demand passwords you do not trust and you have a very low self esteem.

If you the Dominant are insecure how can you control someone and your ego not be behind the force of your relationship? A relationship based on insecurities and ego will be short lived and you brought it on yourself, but you will sit in a corner and cry like a little bitch. Even in a relationship when things don’t go your way you still act like a little bitch.

You cannot be a part time Master , you have to be a Master 24/7 365

If you noticed I did not speak to much about Kink , or Bondage. My relationship runs much deeper. While at times I enjoy getting rough , at times I enjoy bondage , at times I get off on sexual abuse , face fucking being my favorite, then anal. I am more about the control , I love being in the mind. I love the structure . I have a life with zero problems and zero drama.. I love my life

New Dominants your best source for information http://bestslavetraining.com/

Oh My Ride

 

Grow up and be a man…

 

 

I Am Going To Use You

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, commitment, Consistency, control, Master and slave relationship, Punishment, Slave, Structure, Submission, Submissive, training your slave, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 25, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

I want to be your friend , I want to be your best friend , I want to know everything about you  starting with your earliest memories. I want to know the foods you like, movies , music, hobbies.

I want to be by your side , I want to be the shoulder  you lean on , I want to be the one you know you can depend on. I want to hold you so I can feel your inner soul , your thoughts and your needs. I want inside your mind including the good and bad . I want to know your thoughts at all times, but most of all I want you to know you can come to me and speak openly. I want you to feel as if you can speak to me without fear , this is a need I have.

I am going to use you , you are for my pleasure , you are for my use. I do not want to make love I want to fuck , I do not want my dick sucked I want to fuck your mouth. You have three holes for my use and will use when I have the need.

I will tie you up, gag you and at times even leave my mark. You have moved from being my best friend to my slave and property.

I am going to train you to fit my needs, I am going to change your train of thought , I am going to implement rules which you will follow, I will put protocols in place in which you will follow. I will allow open communication that is a need for me.

I am not trying to change you, I am going by what you told me from the beginning , you expressed your needs , you told me you wanted and had a need to be owned.

I am going to train you , train you how to act while out in public , remember you are a direct reflection of me your Master. When out alone you are a direct reflection of me , our world is small but you never know who you may run into, so it is best to be on your best behaviour.

I will put rules and protocols in place and you will follow, I will punish when needed but I will not punish you for no reason.

I will make you mine, I will make you feel owned, I will make you want to feel owned, I will make you crave submission. I will make you.

Now you ask what do I get out of the relationship ?

You get my undivided attention , I am here for you 24/7. I give you open communication, I give you loyalty , I give you the security you need, the guidance you need. I will alway put you first in my life no matter where I am or what I am doing . Yes you get me and all of me.

I will walk proudly with you , I will be honored to have you at my side. I will talk to you not at you.

I want you to have friends , I will encourage you

I will make sure your needs are met, I will not push you to the point of breaking you, but most of all I will respect you.

Vile

 

 

BDSM And Discipline

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Abuse, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Slave, BDSM Structure, Building a BDSM Relationshp, communication, consequences, Consistency, controlling, Discipline, Dominant and Submissive, Dominants, Ego, fucking and sucking, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Humiliation, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Protocols, punish, Punishment, Slave, Structure, Submission, training your slave, Training your submissive, viledesires62@aol.com with tags , , , , , , , , , on March 25, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Discipline is something I do not look forward to nor do I set back and hope a rule will be broken. That takes way to much time and causes one to walk on egg shells….

My observation in the lifestyle most Discipline or punishment is in a  physical form and consist of pain and leaving black and blue marks , how ever I believe something that is looked over when others speak of being punished is aftercare.

Being punished the different forms , the main of course which is most commonly used is physical, which I have used in the past , but my way of thinking if a rule or protocol is broken 99% of the time it was a mistake. So I sit down and talk so I can find out what happened. Did something come up , or was it forgotten? The next question is what can be done to prevent it from happening again , what steps are going to be taking to make sure it does not happen again?

Some different ways besides physical , would be verbal , talking and seeing what happened.  taking something away , taking a privilege away , confinement, you get the idea. Beating someone is not always the answer although if you read enough blogs or talk with others this seems to be the trend today.

If a submissive or slave is breaking rules on a daily basis there is a problem, a lack of attention or maybe the training.

I met a Baby girl at a local function I know the Dom well, and while outside I could hear the displeasure in her voice. She had just moved from Main down to Florida and the end result was not good he ended up putting her out on the street.

A friend of mine sent me a text and asked me to call him so we could figure out what happened and what we could do. We did find her a place to stay but she had already made arrangements to fly home with the help of her parents.

Why was it her fault ? Number one she did not do her homework , she did not Vet him prior to moving down meaning she did not contact anyone to see if he was who he said he was, as it turned out he was not.. She took his word on everything , only to sell everything she owned moved and found out soon afterward everything was a lie.

I tried to reach out to him after she contacted me and asked why he was kicking her out? He just stated she was not for him, and when I asked if he was just going to put her out his answer was yes.

The texting was going good until I asked him what steps he had taken in training her , and the conversation went dead. This just proved he had no clue, nor did he care about putting the work into the relationship to make it work.

I think when it comes to our lifestyle Discipline in someways are over played , many see discipline as a daily ritual , see it as needed in order to be in a relationship.

Just a few and the first and most popular is the physical part the spanking, the beating, the leaving bruises as a reminder a show of Authority showing who is in charge.

Self punishment which I always found funny, that is something I never took part in and I find it to be Ego driven and someone who is full of their own shit.

Taking a privilege away something the submissive or slave enjoys, be it TV , a girls night out, their ipad something one cherishes. Free time giving during the day , down time, I have found this to be very effective.

Then talking , communication sitting down one on one and find out what happened , why was a rule broken ? There are times when it cant be helped, and at times things need to be looked over.

As Dominants you spend so much of your time building an awesome relationship why would one take the time to beat someone so precious, someone who is suppose to mean the world to you.

Those who do not have a clue spend much of their time talking down to the sub or slave, degrading and humiliating. This is to keep someone at a very low self esteem, and unless they are able to communicate with others, they do not know any better..

The Slave

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, A Slave Is High Maintenance, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Protocols, BDSM Relationship, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Rules, Building a BDSM Relationshp, Collar, Collared Slave, commitment, communication, compatibility, Consensual, Consistency, consistent, Dominant, emotional, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Inservice Slave, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Mental BDSM, Micromanagement, positive reinforcement, Private Protocol, Protocol public, Protocols, Punishment, Slave, Slave Owned Property, Submission, submissive, TPE, Training Arianna, Vile Woods on FaceBook, viledesires62@aol.com on February 22, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

I never pressured Arianna to call me Sir or Master , I waited because such an honor is clearly earned.

I loved the steps I took in building a relationship, I loved watching the relationship grow, but I also knew in order for it to be successful I had to be who and what I was.

I wanted Arianna to ask , and I waited for that question. Will you be my Master, I knew then I was on the right path.

Although we spoke of training and what our goals were , yes hers and mine , I did not go into any great detail and only answering questions when they were asked.

By earning ones respect you get so much more than trying to demand submission. You can demand submission but your not getting the whole picture nor are you entering a true relationship with any meaning.

A slave is not weak a slave is strong in mind body and soul, however a Slave does have different needs and goals, along with a different type of structure.

I had a strict 90 day plan in hand and I began training without a word. The one thing that made me stop and think was there was absolutely no resistance this was something I had never experienced. Today our relationship requires only daily maintenance , as with any other relationships just on a different level.

There are many definitions today when we try to define a D’s or M’s relationship we are all different and we have different needs.

Although Arianna may be my wife, best friend and partner she is property first, she wears a collar 24/7 that shows my ownership, I can proudly say it has been over 3 years she she has been collard and it has not been off one time. She wears her collar proudly and yes this includes work. Before entering a relationship that was a strict requirement of mine.

Many today do not take the collar serious , it is worn during play , when out to local functions, or when company comes over that is the only time it has any real meaning. If that is your lifestyle that is fine it fits you…

Although we train and we train to fit our needs  , we also have to take the slave into consideration. We need to set goals, we need to insure our property fully understands what is about to happen. We need to insure their needs are met on all levels, many would like to think it is a one way street but that is so far from the truth.

I myself take the collar very serious , it is a sign of ownership, it is a sign of devotion, it is a sign of submission, again do not take this wrong this is only my opinion.

Master/slave

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Respecting ones limits be it physically or mentally , knowing the limitations , knowing just how far you can go and still remain in control. Fixing problems before they become problems.

The feeling of security , the feeling of being wanted , the feeling of being needed, but most of all the feeling of being able to trust and respect.

In the beginning when the relationship is defined , what is expected , the rules and protocols, once everything is in place we as Masters cannot change things up a year later, many times going back on your word can be a deal breaker. There are times when something may need to be changed but I feel it needs to be explained in detail how it would benefit the home.

Training is changing the thought process , training is changing habit and replacing them. If you sit and think if done right you can create the perfect partner, that is the easy part , the hard part comes with maintaining it.

The training would include verbal , physical , mental, emotional , and at times rituals this is where structure comes into place. In my Master , slave or Owner , Property structure plays a huge part as with rituals , rituals become rules, protocols become rules.

Although I do feel punishment is needed that is not my main focus, I do not sit around and wait on Arianna to break a rule, she knows when she breaks a rule, which I can say has only happened once in 3.5 years. Positive reinforcement and communication plays a huge roll in any relationship.

Breaking someone to the point of feeling worthless , constant humiliation , abuse mental and physical , remember if you break it you have to fix it. I am more than sure the end result is not something you would want in a lifetime partner.

Training comes in a few different areas , be it service , sexual,  how to speak in public what to wear , how to talk , how to communicate with people or who not to communicate, who to hug or who you shake hands with ,how much do you want to control? We live a Owner Property relationship , a consensual relationship , consensual being the key word. Make no mistake I run and control everything in my home.

Just make sure who ever you are considering make sure they have your best interest in mind..

 

 

 

Your Slave Is Your Property

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, abuse, Acceptance, adapting, Adrenaline, are you submissive, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, BDSM Rules, BDSM Slave, BDSM Slave training, BDSM TPE Relationships, commitment, communication, compatibility, CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENT, Consistency, Daddy Doms, Dominants, Master And Slave, molding your slave, Punishment, slave, Submission, submissive, Total Power Exchange, Total Submission, TPE, Training Arianna, training your slave, Training your submissive on July 27, 2015 by thekinkyworldofvile

Your Slave is not your maid , your slave is not your mommy, your slave is not your punching bag when you lose your temper.

This includes those who are submissive, Baby Girls , what ever you define yourself in the lifestyle, you should not be part of the above.

Those Dominants , those Daddy Dom’s and Masters who show the above behavior are very short lived, some learn from mistakes but most do not.

Much of my blog has been about abuse , I suppose it stems from having a soft spot when it comes to abuse when women are involved.  What I have learned though in the last three years is no one listens, I am of course speaking of those who are baby girls, those who are submissive, and even slaves. I will say the only ones who do not listen are those who are new to the lifestyle, those who are fresh meat, less than a year maybe two.

At times I share my personal email , I want to help , I thrive in that role.I love picking those up in need and showing them the right way, but what is most important is I never ask for anything in return. It is unfortunate most want you to fix everything without putting any effort into the cause. Most want everything handed on a silver platter and walk off into the sunset dusting their hands off acting like it was them who handled everything. Shrugs it is what it is.

I receive emails asking for advice , and after the first email I never hear anything back because it was not what they wanted to hear. Again it is what it is.

So I am going to be moving in a different direction for the most , moving away from the advice and the abuse blog , because every blog in that direction is time spent I will never get back. You guide those who truly want it , but you cannot fix stupid.

Most people are not really into the BDSM lifestyle , I think most fall under Kink and they want to be associated with the term BDSM , maybe it gives some type of validation. I would like to remind some that these are the same people telling those who do live the lifestyle they are wrong.

What if things were different ? What if three thousand years ago there were 12 Dominants and one Master who walked the earth teaching BDSM ? What if these 12 men wrote a BDSM Bible ? How would things be different today ? How different would our lives be ?

There are thousands of books that focus on BDSM relationships , while some of these books are good, and while some do have some good ideas , very few of them would actually help those in the lifestyle or those who are new to the lifestyle.

Those books just like my blog are my opinion and what works for me, those books are their opinion and what works for them.What works for someone else will not work for you because our needs and wants are much different.

As usual I am way off track so let me focus a little bit here.

It is funny my wife and slave wrote a blog while I was trying to finish this one up. Today with work and life if I do a blog it is stretched over 4 or 5 days.

https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/07/26/observations/

Arianna calls me Master , and Sir was something I earned, as she states in her blog , she did turn down my collar the first time I offered it to her, and I understood why. I knew though as long as I stayed on the same path there would come a time she would kneel and allow me to slip the collar on.

Although she does call me Master I consider myself to be an Owner, and Owner of property, we live a Total Power Exchange, consensual , none consensual.

Arianna speaks about how I support her, how I am there for her not just part time but 24/7 no questions. That is the role I not only signed up for , but that is the role I agreed to.

The love and only love of my life, but before being my wife and slave , Arianna is my property, I own her. As A Daddy Dom, a Dominant , Master or Owner you have to keep that frame of mind. There is no switch that can be turned off and on, the switch is in the open and locked position.

You as the Submissive , the slave when entering a relationship you have to be in the right frame of mind, you have to not only want to submit, you have to have the need to submit. You have to have the need to be trained, to be trained to fit someones needs and wants. You have to put all resistance to the side. You have to be able to communicate openly without fear, you have to be able to communicate your feelings and needs.

Day one until about six months into our relationship , Arianna still questioned me about my choices , she questioned me about the things I did that would effect our lives. Why did she do this ? I had not fully gained Arianna’s trust, she trusted me but not enough to fully give herself. She still feared giving herself fully. She had just been through a couple of bad relationships, and the Break down as well. Arianna had to know without a doubt I had her best interest in mind.

How did I win her over? I was honest, I told the truth, I introduced her to people I knew in the lifestyle dating back to 15 and 20 years. I communicated , but the key that un locked everything is I remained Consistent on a daily basis, on a hour by hour basis.

It was roughly about the first year into our relationship that Arianna received her first punishment. Think about that one year, I cannot just sit around and watch and hope Arianna breaks a rule, I am not going to waste my time with such little boy thoughts.

If you the Dominant or Master are spending more time punishing than communicating , then you need to sit down and think about your relationship and what is going wrong.

Either your training is or was not effective or your submissive does not take the lifestyle serious. Maybe it is you the Dominant who does not take your relationship serious. Maybe she is not submissive but just more into the kink, Maybe your not Dominant?

If you are one to lose your temper, if your one to scream and yell, if your one to get physical, you will never be respected and respect is not something you can demand.

A submissive emailed me about a new Dom she had met. One of his first rules was for her to call him sir, I simply asked if he had earned her respect and she never emailed me back….

So what do I get out of all of this you may ask? The truth is anything I want, when and how and where I want. Bringing back up the consensual , non consensual M’s relationship.

Still to date I can honestly say Arianna and I still have not had one argument, I have never lost my temper with her nor have I had the desire. This is due to our communication.
I am however ashamed to say she has seen me lose my temper in public and she actually thought I was going to jail, the security Guard had his hand on his gun, but in the end it was settled when I spoke with a different rep.

Being a Dominant is not an easy task , and that would be someone new as well as someone who is experienced. We are now looking out for two, so what ever decision we make now effects two not just one.

Your property should come first without question , I have stated this many many times. When you agreed to enter a relationship that is what you the Dominant signed up for, the good, the bad and the ugly.

trust

Vile