2020 What a fucking year

It has been sometime but as you know life does tend to get in the way. Ive been contemplating on what to write and my brain just sits and spins.

I do hope everyone is doing ok and I am hoping we are nearing the end of a total fucked disaster. Arianna and I stayed locked up for the better part of 7 months or so and we both came to a conclusion that we needed to get out.

We were within days of purchasing a new home, well not new but new to us and as the purchase was getting closer I began to have second thoughts. Our current house payment is less than most pay in rent but the new house the payment would of doubled a little more, costing us about a 1000.00 a month more. I am 58 and Arianna wants me to retire when I turn 62, fuck I am counting down the days. Anyway making that new purchase would of delayed my retirement by some 15 years or so. The thought of spending nearly 300K on a house really made us think.

Arianna and I stayed locked up for about 6 months and together we made the decision to venture out and to date everything is good.

There is this dive bar we enjoy going to it is like everyone is family, Arianna enjoys Karaoke and we hit it about 3 or 4 times a month. The DJ really sucked so I spoke with the owner and told her arianna and I were interested in taking over and we would blow peoples minds. When asked about experience I told her we have zero. Her question was how do you know you will be good at it? Well because I just told you we would be.

We really knew nothing and went out about purchased crappy equipment and we both learned our lesson. Arianna called peavey and directed us in the right direction. We purchased equipment you could use for a concert. Three days a week 5 hours a night and it is mad money. The equipment cost was 3100, but that was paid off in less than two months.

I have been contacted by several in the community asking if I would consider starting a local MAsT chapter and my answer was no, there was no need since there was a active chapter in Orlando which to my knowledge is doing well.

I have learned one thing and that is to keep your friend circle really small. If you check my Fetlife account I actually have very few friends.

I have also learned if you are having issues or problems it does no good to reach out to others in the community. I was contact by someone last year looking for some type of counseling. I reached out to a few people and was told it was not their problem. I did the same for me, having some issues and I blew up at some people but what caused it was trying to reach out to others and was told the same thing. Now I am not here bitching or crying, I am just stating facts. This is why I said keep your friend circle as small as you can..

Things here are good and life is good we both hope everyone is doing Ok.

I am thinking of something to write about.

Vile

Your Going To Be Someones Personal Bitch

I use the word Bitch Loosely , to me it is more of a pet name, my bitch , my slut, my whore, my everything.

It is only our lifestyle you can teach someone how to sit , eat , dress, walk , talk, suck cock and fuck. It is only our lifestyle you can enforce rules , protocols and for the most structure. Our lifestyle is the only one where someone will fully submit without question or hesitation.

There are a few things in life that I strive for and thrive in. That is a well structured home, a drama free home and a home without fighting. I am and need to be in control of my home and surroundings.

I dated a hundred before I found the one. I did not fuck a hundred , I fucked the one. The one takes time, it takes dedication, and you need to stay on one path and not many.

After years of settling for less I had to do some soul-searching , because I had to figure out who I was , what I needed and the type of slave that would make me complete, someone who would compliment me. Someone who needed the above not just wanted.

So you can gain submission through intimidation but your really not accomplishing anything , you’re not earning anything in fact it is fake submission and that will only last so long. However if you earn the respect someone will want to follow on their own free will.

It is amazing to be able to sit back and watch the transformation when training someone, watching the changes and the one being trained does not even notice the changes.  Then one day it will hit them and it will be like holy fuck batman what the fuck?

Here is something to think about. Words yes I said words , words have different effects on people more so those who are submissive or slaves.

Words, No , Sit , stand , spread, inspection , suck my cock , lube your ass. These words have different meanings , depending on who you are speaking to and the depth of ones submission. Some may take those words as being funny, a joke if they are not in the right frame of mind.

You think about Rules , and Protocols all have a different meaning depending on where you are at in your head. The above should be a need and not a want. In the lifestyle wants have zero meaning, it is needs that should be met.

You are now someones property , you are now for someones use. You are going to do things you either do not like or have no interest in, but the same will go the other way.

If you are not in the right frame of mind you get nothing , you get nothing out of training or the relationship. What is more important if you are not in the right frame of mind or it turns out it is just a fantasy you have wasted someones time who has dedicated time into building a relationship , and all is for nothing.

This is part of a comment I just replied to , she had found a Slave contract online ..

I just read the most appalling example of a slave contract where it was proposed to beat her daily, keep her in a cage, make her drink piss and eat dog food, enslave her for life or sell her, own her bred kids as though chattel, and let her kill self when old and sick.

Okay pretty extreme , I have known Masters who were this strict, not to the point of killing ones self. I think if someone spent a great deal of time with someone the Master or Slave would take care of someone if they got sick.

If Arianna was Bedridden I would take care of her that is how deep much love is for her. I would not think of putting her in a home , because she has giving me so much, and I promised to take care of her.. Divorcing or separating is the easy way out today , why would you want to work something out? Maybe because it takes up to much of your precious time ?

You the Slave has to be in the right frame of mind, your Master is already there or you hope he is. A Master can let his feeling get in the way when it comes to enforcing rules, or even punishing.

You know what fuck looking at contracts online if you are both serious about having a paper contract you should sit down and come to some sort of agreement. When a submissive goes out and googles slave contract it scares the fuck out of her, daily beatings, drinking piss, being shared , eating dog food, really ?

How deep does your submission run ? What makes you think your submissive ? What makes you think your a Slave ? Have you really thought about training ? What do you want out of training ? Have you thought about what type of Dominant your looking for ? Have you thought about turning your life over to someone?

I want all of your passwords, I want access to your cell phone, I want your banking information.  My question is why? When I hear these words they come from a Dominant who has no experience, has a low self esteem. Has trust issues , or just a mental case.

A submissive contacted me last year and said she had giving all of her passed words and banking info , woke up the next day flat ass broke because he emptied her bank account, shut her phone off and had bought a new cell phone with her money. Did she call the police ? Nope , why? Because she was ashamed to tell anyone about her lifestyle.

In the end your going to be someones Bitch you have to decide which side of the fence you want to be on..

Remember one thing a True Dominant will never scream or lose their temper towards you.

It is not always the Dominant , at times there are those who get off on playing games. Mind fuckers is what I call them..

While your at it go check out this awesome blog , there is so much information..

https://livingwithx.wordpress.com/

 

Vile

 

 

 

 

 

I Am Going To Use You

I want to be your friend , I want to be your best friend , I want to know everything about you  starting with your earliest memories. I want to know the foods you like, movies , music, hobbies.

I want to be by your side , I want to be the shoulder  you lean on , I want to be the one you know you can depend on. I want to hold you so I can feel your inner soul , your thoughts and your needs. I want inside your mind including the good and bad . I want to know your thoughts at all times, but most of all I want you to know you can come to me and speak openly. I want you to feel as if you can speak to me without fear , this is a need I have.

I am going to use you , you are for my pleasure , you are for my use. I do not want to make love I want to fuck , I do not want my dick sucked I want to fuck your mouth. You have three holes for my use and will use when I have the need.

I will tie you up, gag you and at times even leave my mark. You have moved from being my best friend to my slave and property.

I am going to train you to fit my needs, I am going to change your train of thought , I am going to implement rules which you will follow, I will put protocols in place in which you will follow. I will allow open communication that is a need for me.

I am not trying to change you, I am going by what you told me from the beginning , you expressed your needs , you told me you wanted and had a need to be owned.

I am going to train you , train you how to act while out in public , remember you are a direct reflection of me your Master. When out alone you are a direct reflection of me , our world is small but you never know who you may run into, so it is best to be on your best behaviour.

I will put rules and protocols in place and you will follow, I will punish when needed but I will not punish you for no reason.

I will make you mine, I will make you feel owned, I will make you want to feel owned, I will make you crave submission. I will make you.

Now you ask what do I get out of the relationship ?

You get my undivided attention , I am here for you 24/7. I give you open communication, I give you loyalty , I give you the security you need, the guidance you need. I will alway put you first in my life no matter where I am or what I am doing . Yes you get me and all of me.

I will walk proudly with you , I will be honored to have you at my side. I will talk to you not at you.

I want you to have friends , I will encourage you

I will make sure your needs are met, I will not push you to the point of breaking you, but most of all I will respect you.

Vile

 

 

Implementing Rules

Over the years I have talked to hundreds or slaves and those who are submissive, most of the conversation has been about rules , who when , what and where?

You meet a new Dominant and after the meeting you have a long list of rules you must learn and remember word for word, you must be able to repeat them when asked , but the fact is the Dominant cannot do that. Why ask someone to do something if you cannot do it?

Knowing someone for an hour , a week or even a month there is no way someone could possibly implement any type of rules.

You have a Dominant then you have a Master these are clearly two different type of people. In most cases the Master is in a TPE relationship , Total Power Exchange while a D’s relationship the submissive has say in what happens and can say NO fuck you I am not doing it. A TPE relationship runs much deeper but in many ways both have the same responsibility. We are to take care of ours and we ensure our partner is on the right path. We set goals , we have a plan for self-improvement so the rules we put in place should be for the good.

Dominants and Masters are in theory Therapist  without PHD’s  but the difference is we can come up with a plan, a plan to guide someone in the right direction. A Therapist spends about 15 minutes in a session and tries to make decisions based on the information giving. Based on the information giving is based on the prescription giving, and I know from experience more often the information that is giving is not 100% honest. Most do not feel comfortable opening up their life to a complete stranger more so if you’re in the lifestyle. If you do not share your lifestyle there is no way anyone can possibly make the right decision.

When asked by a doctor about our home life I explain we have a very structured home, we have communication, no drama but most of all no arguing. Most catch on  to our lifestyle without me having to go into great detail. I go on to explain I take care of everything , I handle all problems we may face and at times I handle problems Arianna knows nothing about.

A great deal of those who are slaves and submissive suffer from some type of depression , some are even bi-polar. I did not say all so please do not put words in my mouth.

Many take medications many take more than one, so we need to know what type of medication and why? What is your medication suppose to do and what happens if you do not take it?

we have to know all of the above before we can even think about giving out any type of rules.

We have to know what makes them tick, why do they think the way they do, but most important what are they thinking at any giving moment. I know several times a day I ask Arianna what is on her mind, what is she thinking? Many times if you ask what is wrong it throws up a defense a wall goes up and the fight begins, when in actuality there may have been nothing wrong. This is the base of most arguments , fights screaming at each other. we say things to hurt each other, we use words we would not normally use. It takes longer for words to heal than it does a black eye, words are never forgotten.

A few things we tell a potential partner when we first meet them is always be honest , meaning always tell me the truth. Be open , communicate and always be loyal. We also state we will be there no matter what and we have their back when no one else will.

If we expect the above then why would a Slave not expect the same in return? Why should we be held to different standards ?

Submission cannot be demanded, respect cannot be demanded, loyalty cannot be demanded. Everything we do as a Master or Dominant has to be earned.

You will call me Sir , you will call me Daddy, you will call me Master why ? This or those titles we so crave are earned, the same way we earn respect , the same way we earn trust.

Once you begin or agree to start a relationship then we can start to implement some rules, perhaps a daily bed time or a wake up time. If medication is being taking a good rule would be to let you know when and what.

Most Dominants who are new to the lifestyle often give rules out that are just sexually based. Like you must worship my cock  or suck whenever we are alone. You must wear short skirts with no panties. You will learn to take my pain, you get the idea nothing has to do with structure or improvement.

Just because we are Dominant does not mean the submissive next door  will fit our needs, it does not mean the slave we are talking to is our fit. This is where the getting to know each other comes in. Learning about each other, our likes and dislikes. We do not want to come off as trying to change someone, we want to let the slave know we want to improve.  Although changing someone can be done it does in tell a lot of work and should only be done if you plan on the relationship being long term.

There are two hard parts in finding the perfect partner and there is someone who is perfect. Finding the right partner, then finding the right partner who is willing to adapt to your ways, follow your rules, follow your structure and be willing to be trained and take it seriously. If you find the above then it is a need for the slave..

Have a plan put in place, knowing who you are and what type of Dominant you are will determine what plan you need. This goes for the same with the sub or slave.

If you’re a Daddy Dom why would you pursue a Submissive or even a Slave? If you’re a Baby Girl why would you pursue a Dominant or a master?

Rules and protocols run the same path both basically have the same outcome. However, both will help where help is needed.

The slave must be willing first off, rules , protocols, and training must be a need , if everything is just a fantasy it will be time wasted, if a need the possibility’s are unlimited .

The need to give up total control the,  need to give another total control, not a want but a true need.

If your rules are mostly about sucking cock, no panties in public , or anal training if you’re in a LTR , sending pics or videos , then maybe you should sit back and rethink your relationship.

You have to truly need it, you need to crave and with the right leader your relationship will truly rock.

Before moving into a relationship why would you not want someone who wants to be friends, someone who wants to get to know you as a person a friend , even a best friend before moving into the kink area. I would think you would want someone who has your best interest in mind and you can see the difference but you turn your head hoping everything will be okay , even if it is not you stick around in fear of being alone…

Living apart makes a D’s relationship rather hard for the Dominant to maintain control. I myself am hands on, I am visual. I like to stay in contact even through out the day, I like knowing where mine is and what she or they are doing. I require check-ins, I want to know how the day is going. These are forms of protocols  if you have enough protocols in place very few rules are actually needed..

Rules are meant to improve where improvement is needed…

Last you must have 24/7 access toyour  Dominant , you must be able to ask questions ands hare your concerns. You must be allowed to communicate.. A good Dominant will never raise his voice or shlow anger towards you

Vile

 

 

 

Abuse Is Alive And Well

MAsT:Kissimmee

 

May 19th

 

Meeting

A small group of 9 attended the 19th meeting and the topic was abuse. Even though I lead the MAsT, Masters and Slaves Together. http://www.mast.net , if you are not familiar with MAsT check out the site.

Abuse many understood how abuse can happen in a D’s or M’s relationship some were still unsure.

Girl- L  who is an awesome friend helped facilitate the meeting and she came loaded with awesome information. I myself like to let different people facilitate MAsT meetings because it make someone feel a part of. We also get different point of views which is truly needed.

The meeting is held at our home , meeting in this type of environment allows people to speak freely with out prying ears. It allows people to relax and let go where as they would not in a public setting.

We also spoke about how abuse is just not about men but there are women who abuse as well , mainly through manipulation or known better Topping from the Bottom. Most of the time this only occurs if the Dominant is not experienced or very new to the lifestyle…

Many times the abuse can be stopped prior to entering a relationship with the right education and asking the right questions. The problem today is many are to impatient and do not care about taking the proper steps. Being active in the community is a huge step forward , making friends as well. I have a handful of people I actually consider my friend. However being active does not always solve all problems because there is a dick or a bitch at every corner. The thing is it does not matter what others think about you or how you should be living your life, that is unless they are going to pay your bills..

One thing about the BDSM lifestyle is everybody is right and no one is wrong , everyone has the right answer and everyone is wrong. No one knows what they are talking about, even on Fetlife everyone is wrong. The one thing i noticed is all the people giving advice about how your life should go are single more so Doms. So yes taking advice from someone who has never been a D’s relationship is the way to go..

Abuse when it comes to the lifestyle is a huge gray area and it can be a touchy subject for some.

I know I have been approached by Doms in the community asking me if I thought I was to strict on Arianna. I suppose this is the difference between a Master and a Dominant, a Submissive and a Slave, having rules and protocols or just letting your girl run wild, and having no consequences for their actions.

I run a very smooth home, I am strict and firm, but I do so without arguing , screaming, calling names or even getting physical. I have rules in place and they are followed, I have protocols and they are followed.

I am not a 9 to 5 Dominant , I am not a weekend warrior , I am not a once every now and then Dominant , I am 24/7 and no less. I take full responsibility for not only my relationship but I admit when a mistake is made. One thing Arianna comes first and always will , I will drop what ever I am doing if needed. A Submissive or Slave should have 24/7 access to their Dominant or Master and no less, there are no excuses.

Okay ive been ranting a little and if you follow me you know by know I get off the subject at times.

One thing that really irks me is when mental abuse comes into play. When a slave or submissive is suffering from depressions, maybe being bipolar , manic and the newly found Dom does not see the signs or maybe he just does not give a fuck. Having any or all of these symptoms can put unneeded stress on someone and cause more damage.

Many times everything is in the open but many times who ever suffers from such a  disease will not be upfront about their illness. Many are ashamed but more are scared of failing a new relationship.

I myself cannot even imagine how someone who is bipolar , come close to even knowing what their thought process is, or even how one makes it through a normal day , much less how someone would handle being tied down and beaten, or used sexually. I would not even want to comprehend the thought process, or how scared or confused someone might be.

On the other hand there are some aspects of the lifestyle in which someone could benefit from a D’s or M’s home , if it was based on more of a structured setting , where rules and protocols were put in place to be beneficial. Understanding ones limits and not trying to push that explore button.  Insuring they are on medication and on the proper medication.

Just to let you know I am not talking out of my ass I am speaking from experience. I am living in such a relationship. The beginning  was a rough start but 3 years later I am and we are blessed. I suppose the setting would be different if love did not play a part , I suppose it would be different if you were just being used as a fuck toy….

The above can only be accomplished if you truly know someone and you care enough to put any effort into building a lasting relationship.

Some of the most common situations when it comes to abuse starts out with isolation. Separating you from friends and family. Making you turn over passwords to all of your accounts. Emails , social media , not allowing you to speak with other Doms, and the most severe is your banking information.

These tactics are used by Doms who are insecure or new to the lifestyle. Many have anger issues and use fear in order to obtain your submission, verbal and eventually it will turn physical.

Being new it will take some time to catch on before you will see the abuse or something pay hit you , thinking Hmmm there is something here that is not right. You feel like you have no one to turn to, after all you have turned your back on all of your friends, but even then how would you explain such a relationship?

Female abuse happens often and this is done through manipulation, and it happens with a Dom who lacks experience. However there are times when ones judgement can be blurred by letting feeling get in the way of a D’s or M’s relationship.

I have written about this subject many many times and at times I get this fuck it attitude because the truth is maybe one out of a hundred even takes notice.

The signs are clear first is isolation from friends and family , making you give all passwords to your email and social  media and email. Constantly putting you down calling you names and telling you , you area  worthless bitch. At times taking your banking information.

The fist date is either a Denny’s or a motel and your training starts off with you sucking cock. You get to see your new Dom maybe once a month if your lucky, or maybe more often to suck cock. The first date is the only date you are seen in public with him, unless your dumb enough to invite a total stranger to your house.

When you ask a question or question the way the relationship is going you get yelled at.

You the s;ave the submissive should have 24/7 access to your Dominant no questions asked. If you text you should get an answer , but most of the time it is days not minutes.

Most of the time you know something is wrong but you have it in your head he is the one, there is no one else who can fill his shoes , or should I say diapers.

You know I am not so sure it is abuse at times , I think it is more on the side of the Dom not knowing what they are doing. Many do not understand the amount of time it takes to develop a new D’s or M’s relationship, or most may not want to invest the time it takes, or some may not even consider the needs the submissive may have. Many see the relationship more as a maid service or just a sex toy but it runs much much deeper than just a piece of ass.

Ive had many new Dominants tell me they want to talk and spend time with me, and after I agree I hear nothing else from them.

There are those who are just male chauvinist pigs who see a bdsm relationship as a open door to abuse and just use and toss away until they have that need again.

After 3 years I am still finding it takes a great deal of time and communication.. I get to a point to where I have to alter things such as protocols or rules , I may have to add or take away. Both of us sit down and go over the rules to see if they still apply or maybe make some changes, maybe head in a new direction.

Only you the submissive knows what you need and you need to have a plan and know exactly what you need out of a relationship. Because a mistake made more than once is a decision , and everything falls on you if you allow yourself to continue to be unhappy or used…

What kind of Dom are you looking for ? What type of submissive are you ? Are you a slave? If so a Daddy Dom would not fit your needs. Are you a Masochist ? Then a Daddy Dom is not going to work.

You need to know who you are and what you need before you can begin your search.  Just because a Dom contacts you does not mean he is the one for you…

Last you need someone you can talk to , someone who understands you or at least tries, you need to have an outlet when something is not going well….

Again a Mistake made more than one is a decision..

There are those who crave to be used for what ever reason , those who continue to fall into the same trap, and just sit around wondering what has gone wrong or blaming others.. life is based on two things and only two choices and consequences .

Then I have to rag on the married Doms who are married and they cheat on their vanilla wives who know nothing about the other side of their husband. The wives who believe they have built the perfect home. Let me tell you something a man has what he has because of his partner , be it a vanilla wife a submissive or slave she built the kingdom.

He will talk about how bad she is and how he plans to leave her, she is a bitch and does not understand him, there is no communication , she takes no interest in his likes or hobbies. She is a total bitch.

If she was really so bad he would of left long ago. However maybe if this so called Dom had communication skills and really tried his wife who built his kingdom might be open to a little kink.

Instead he finds someone like you, who will take his bullshit , who will take his verbal abuse, and physical abuse. Someone who will take his humiliation, someone who wants to control you but he is controlling not in control. Someone who takes it up the ass because his wife will not…

Your a piece of ass and you will lose every time. You would cost him to much money if he left not to mention if there are kids involved… He is not going to leave the security he has the security his wife has built. You will do just fine until you become to needy and you will and he will dump you because you have become a liability.

While I was married to a vanilla for 9 years I never stepped out on her. I was in the lifestyle prior to meeting her but I was trying to change who I was. I wanted the house, the cars, the kids and the dog. My first month I knew I had made a bad mistake. Remember the choices and consequences ?

After 9 years I came clean about who I was and what I needed. I lost a house on the beach , two cars and a lot of money. I left with 1500 dollars in cash a canvas  bag full of clothes dirty and clean, and a beat up Yamaha 750.

My philosophy is if your not happy get the fuck out.. There is no reason to drag someone through the mud more so over something I did. I lied to her , I mislead her, I was someone I was not, and I made a fool out of her. I can say for the past 9 years I have paid child support every week and I have never missed a payment working or not..

You do not have to let someone drag you through the mud and in the end it will be your fault…

 

 

 

 

Mastering The Master

As much as I would like to think I am not perfect, although many would disagree with that statement. Most who know me think I am loud , very out spoken and at times obnoxious.

On the way to a local coffee group which all the people whoa attend are awesome , a good get together at a local star bucks then at times dinner after. I work from home as most know and come my Friday I need to get out I need that interaction with like minded people.

On our way the group leader was warning new comers of my arrival. I am warning you ahead of time Vile is unfiltered. Unfiltered I never looked at it that way , I simply say what is on my mind be it serious or joking…

Some months ago I received and email from a woman who said my blog was the most disgusting place she had ever visited and i should be shut down. So sitting back I am thinking if you find it that bad, why did you spend time reading it and then making time out of your busy life to email me?

Out in the world I like to have fun , I like to joke around , I enjoy making others laugh, but mostly I love learning how others live our wild lifestyle. I listen , I observe and I take in just like a hard drive on a computer.

I have come a long way in the past twenty five years or so and I am making plans for the next twenty five. I have grown on so many levels , I have set goals , I have made most of my goals and I continue to march forward.

My MAsT Chapter has been approved, Masters And Slaves Together. It was not an easy task and it was about a 13 month process.

Over the years I made mistakes, some were a mistake and at times things I did was because I could, I am me , I will stay me and I will walk my own path , but most of all I will not live a life where I have to be politically correct , my life is on my time and my time only.

I am positive , very optimistic , even if I have negative thoughts I keep them to myself. Everything I do has a plan and I seldom make a mistake but if I do I admit it, after all I can be wrong.

I am in control, I am control of my everyday life, my home and in most cases my job. I run my house , I am in full control, but with all of these choices comes consequences.

Mastering the Master is a long path and it is not an easy road to walk. You have to define who and what you are, you have to define where you are and where you want to be, you have to define the type of relationship you want, but most of all you have to define the type of partner you need in your life, not want but need, a want is nothing a want has no meaning and at times a want can be destructive and childish. I concentrate on my needs if my needs are met there are no wants.

When I first met Arianna I made a promise and a commitment , I told her I will never raise my voice towards her or call her names out of anger and some 3 years later this still holds true. Being in control was a strong need to me , being able to not only listen but being able to communicate in a clear and understanding voice. Saying what I mean and mean what I say , not only saying what I will do but do the things I said I would.

Some say it is healthy to argue and while I may agree a little it depends on how you agree to argue. Bruises heal words cut deeper bruises hurt but words effect someone on a very deep mental state and while one can forgive one will never forget The more you hurt with your words the more you are in danger of losing what you have.

If you are fighting with yours Slave or submissive if you had any type of training then you as a Master needs to sit back and maybe come up with a different approach.

MASTER / SLAVE

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.^[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master,” whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.^[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

No where in the above definition does it mention a Master Arguing with their Slave. No where in the statement above does it mention a Master Losing control.

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship.

If you the Master argues with your Slave not submissive but your Slave who is the bitch in the relationship ?

When entering a M/s relationship , a power exchange relationship or a Total power exchange you the Master are taking on a huge responsibility. You need to have a clear plan and a training program in place and a training program that puts you in the lead but more important one who will follow and have the need to follow.

Training someone takes a great deal of thought , every submissive or Slave has a different thought process, different habits and react in different ways . Some are emotional , some may suffer from some type of depression , some may suffer from anxiety the list goes on and on, so what worked in your last relationship surely will not work in your next , that includes training and rules..

I think a lot of the misunderstanding comes from someone who is new to the lifestyle and just jumps in head first and not really having a clue… Waking up one morning and your a Master because of a blog or a porn site you ran across. We as humans are visual and you google BDSM and click images and there is your definition.

Mastering the Master , Mastering communication , Mastering honesty , Mastering commitment, Mastering your devotion , Mastering your understanding of ones needs , Mastering your loyalty , Mastering your consistency , your training but most of all your continued growth.

Each and everyday I work on most of those , not only daily but hourly . I work to maintain what I and we have. I want us as Master and Slave to continue to grow.

The out come is you end up with a best friend , partner , and Slave.

 

Vile

 

We Are Master And Slave

Last Friday we attended a local MAsT meeting and I can say it was one of the best meetings I have been to…

The topic was one I would of never thought of , The Seven Deadly Sins , how interesting does this sound when you attached BDSM to the topic.

Last year I was speaking with a very good friend of mine and the topic of Arianna came up and he said it was like I hit the power ball . He continued saying the relationship we had was very unusual even for a Master and Slave. As I was trying to take in his words I did not fully understand mainly because I am just me.

I very seldom speak about what I have done , nor am I one to brag. Many who know me think I am conceded but that is so far from the truth, the bottom line is I am just confident, and I am confident be it in private or public..

While at MAsT a Mistress made a comment that in any relationship there must be some sort of a exchange of power. As I listened I was trying to understand and I spoke up and said I disagreed , continuing I began to explain in my home I had complete control and the final say.

The Mistress then asked Arianna if she worked out of the home, of course the answer was yes, a 40 hour a week job she has been at for some 16 years. She was then asked if I controlled what she did at work and made her decisions , I saw this getting way off topic, but Arianna replied while she did make decisions at work I knew her every move, Arianna stated if she was told to quit her job she would do so , but it would fall on me, the responsibility and the consequences.

What makes a Master and Slave relationship ? The answer is there is no real clear definition , Each M’s relationship is unique in its own way, it is the way each relationship is defined between two.

The same with those who live a D’s relationship , it is the two who defines their relationship. No one has the right to tell someone they are wrong, no one has the right to tell someone they do not know what they are doing.

Many do not understand our relationship, and while some may be curious once I try and explain some find it to be unbelievable.

Some 3.5 years now I can say Arianna and I have yet to have an argument, and that is something I am proud of , that is something I have or we have both worked hard for. The base of this is from our communication.

When her and I first met we noticed the compatibility right away, we noticed how easy it was to talk to each other and not at each other.

I put strict protocols in place more protocols than rules. Protocol creates stability, consistency and forms good habits , Protocols keeps everything in check, and by staying consistent it keeps everything smooth…

At times a Master needs to humble , a Master needs to accept responsibility when something goes wrong. A Master must admit when he is wrong, as much as I would like to say I am perfect I am not, although at times I may feel I am, but I truly believe that is just confidence.

Expressing my needs prior to entering our relationship , I went into great detail when it came to my needs being met and I was not willing to give in or change anything.

On the other side I had to agree to Arianna’s needs in the type of M’s relationship she was seeking. If I did not agreed with her needs then it would not of been fair if she settled for anything less.

 

Going into a Lifestyle relationship you have to have a clear picture and understanding of what your getting into. If you look over the bad then you have to deal with the consequences, after all you made the choice…

A mistress was questioning Arianna or stating that there had to be a time in our relationship where she had some control, as the conversation continued it was a D’s relationship she was speaking about and not an M’s.

Arianna made the comment , My master has complete control but with control comes consequences. That is a very true statement that is why when I make a major decision I am thinking of two and not one, however there are times we sit down and I want her opinion and there are times when I do take her advice and roll with it.

Instead of criticizing someones relationship  maybe we should take a little to understand their dynamics. Maybe if we took the time to learn our community would not be so divided.

Vile

 

 

 

The 128 Rules

At one time I blasted the 128 rules , maybe because the author of the 128 and I were on a different page or so I thought.

I run a very strict home , I have strict protocols in place as well as rules that are followed to a T.

When I first read the 128 rules , I or my way of thinking the rules were just sexually based , and no structure , well this will be the first time you will hear me say I was wrong.

Okay there I was wrong.

While sitting in the living room I asked Leticia what she was doing , and she stated she was reading the 128 rules.

I kinda looked up and said really ? So tell me what you think about the 128 rules?

Arianna started explaining what the rules really meant was a lot of structure , and protocols, and if a Dominant or Master was able to stay consistent there would be a lot of good growth..

After listening to her side of the story and once I gave it some thought I agreed back tracking from my previous thoughts..

So I reached out to Johnathan Kay , the original Author and asked for permission to use his information in full and he agreed , of course giving credit which he deserves…

128 Rules for the female slave

by Johnathan Kay
(Warning: This is not sex positive. It’s proudly privileged.)

You can learn why I’m not sex positive here.
You can learn why I “Called Red on the Center for Sex Positive Culture” in Seattle here.

You can read my final review of the Center for Sex Positive Culture in Seattle, WA here where I mention I was a member for 15 years. 

Please note the following:

“128 Rules for the female slave” and former “128 Basic slave Rules” are under copyright 1992 by Johnathan Kay. Email me at 128rules@gmail.com for permission to use any of it for any reason. This site is the official blog for the rules:  http://www.128rulesguy.blogspot.com. (use this credit after receiving my permission for use in your application)

Use at your own risk. I take no responsibility for what happens to you when you use the rules. Email me if you have any questions. Remember: First aid works for kinky injuries. So does common sense. Don’t be an idiot. Take precautions. You can do this.

Rules change when I feel like changing them. I’m the Master here…remember that. This blog is the official version….no numbers, no letters….just this blog. You’re reading the current version unless I’m updating it while you’re reading them.

I am “Master-JK” on Fetlife. 

Context

“128 Rules for the female slave” are written for het M/s (Male Master/female slave) relationships.  While it can be converted for other orientations – the focus here will be strictly for Male Dominants/Masters and female submissives/slaves. Those who convert it to fit other orientations must give credit to the blog here as stated above. 

Author’s History

Way back in my college years in the 70’s I had found some adult magazines that depicted either women being restrained in various positions or women as Mistresses (or Dominatrixes as they were also called) who topped people. I like them both. It struck a cord with me and seemed very natural. And through a bit of experimenting over the years with girlfriends whom I would dominate and switching into submission to serve professional Mistresses – I learned a whole lot and I wanted to know more. I read what I could find. I examined toys and how they were used. I wrote various journal entries, stories and scenarios of play and training.


And much later in the mid-80’s I had moved into Seattle and decided to go public, to crawl out of my very private life and go to a conference on bdsm. And wow did I learn so much more. There were people who did all this for real, taught classes, did demos, sold toys. And they were from all walks of life and all different sexual orientations which took some getting used to over the years. It was more than just Masters and slaves. There was all this terminology I had to learn. I found a group called C-Space that offered education that I tried to get to almost every week for more almost four years. And there were more conferences I attended to take classes, play and observe others playing and to buy toys that were being put on a little known group back then called the National Leather Association.


I placed personals in various papers and found submissive women on dating chat lines. I found a kind of freedom where I could be very explicit and more open about what I wanted and how I wanted it done. I attended local events and found a kind of family atmosphere to it all. I found others who needed this lifestyle.


I had started to train gals I met and later one of them asked if I would write all this stuff down that I was teaching her. And the rules document was born – first with 77 rules and later 128. 


While offering the rules to others in newsgroups a gal wrote me and asked if she could print it on her website “Enchantress’s Secret Garden” – found here in the wayback machine internet archive – this one dated in the 90’s (no longer active online),which I allowed back then, and where it spread like wildfire. 


Years later, I was contacted by an editor, Jurgen Boedt, of a magazine in Europe who wanted to print it in his black and white publication called “Secret Magazine” at which point I rewrote the document to include an intro and other parts because I felt readers who would get it in more than six countries would need a little more then just the rules. They would need some background,  some caution and some instructions of how to use the rules list. Secret Magazine spread the rules document over two issues – Issue 14 and 15. 


Through all this I started to join more groups in Seattle, Portland-OR, and Spokane-WA where I was a board member, Tri-Cities-WA and was playing up in Vancouver-BC. And after Beyond the Edge Cafe in Seattle closed after years of being an eating establishment with play spaces in the basement a new group opened and I became a member of SPCC where later I became a life member, still with only a two digit membership number, out of what has grown to nearly 14,000 members in 2011, in what became known as CSPC: Center for the Sex-Positive Culture – a community center model for socializing, play, classes and vendor fairs and where I have played nearly every week for years mainly at the Grind and Pan-Sexual play nights. Soon I had a bit of a dance card schedule going with people scheduled for one of those two nights. And here I am still going at it and loving it. I became polyamorous over the years to expand my skills and give what I learned to more people. I played in the M/s mode, D/s mode and as a Top playing with a bottom. I bought better toys and developed a group of skills of many variations. I acquired a following and a wonderful primary female slave partner whom I live with and enjoy life with in so many ways. Yes, you can find a partner to play with who needs what you can give and what you can offer. 


All in all, from my secretly kept life to going public, I have never turned to look back. This is where I belong. This is what I need. This is what I want. This is where I feel the most alive. This is where I feel like I have come home.

Purpose of the Rules

• For anyoone who wants to find out more about what might be included in a heterosexual Master/slave relationship. 
• To know, as I found out, how fulfilling this lifestyle can be. 
• To feel this ‘at home’ feeling. 
• To feel an intimate sexual ingredient in every part of your life. 
• To know there is a source from which all this comes and allows for living like this to be so special, wanted, and most of all needed and necessary. 
• To feel alive. 
• To know that everything about your life and your past finally makes sense. 
• To feel sensual, sexual, enlightened, and empowered, cared for and desired in a manner you have not found in a vanilla lifestyle. 
• To know how it is to be made free through it all. 
• To seek guidance and realize favor and acceptance with reason. 
• To know what gets you wet and hot and bothered. 
• To find, finally, who you are and where you fit. 

 

Notes for the female slave to Keep in Mind

1. Go slow, have lots of discussions, know that a M/s relationship goes fast, be honest, open, communicate all issues, learn, be ok with mistakes made, listen, and be protective of your well being, psychological, physical, sexual, social and emotional health. 
2. Use your safe words if you have them. 
3. Ask lots of questions. 
4. Read whatever you can find on the M/s lifestyle, toys used, safety, sexual safety, positions, other people’s rules, first aid, techniques, etiquett, practices, culture, traditions, aftercare – this is very important to bring you back from intense play, spiritualism, etc. 
5. Expect to be tested on what you are taught. 
6. Understand punishment as something you would rather not get often. Know that discipline helps to remind you of how to behave. 
7. Each rule has many meanings. Find what speaks to you most to understand and apply the rule. Work with each rule often coming back to re-evaluate them. 
8. Trust is everything. Know your Master. Understand how problems can be resolved. Know to walk away if necessary till you find the right Master for you. 
9. Consider a trial period. 
10. Have a kind of third person thing going on with you and allow it to watch over you and help you get through what you are put to use for and to evaluate how use of you fits. Be able to talk about issues and work to resolve them. 
11. Ask for release from a Master rather than storming out. 
12. Get tested for sexual safety. Be honest with your  Master. Insist your Master gets tested. 
13. Don’t be afraid to use condoms, dental dams, latex or nitrile gloves to be sexually safe. 
14. Tell you doctor exactly how you got the marks on your body so that you get the right kind of medical help. 
15. Adjust and fit the rules for your relationship and needs. Eliminate those you don’t want to use. 
16. Avoid drugs and alcohol when in a M/s relationship. You don’t need any more problems. This lifestyle can be dangerous and you will want to act safely and be safely led and used.
17. Keep a journal – one for you, one for your Master. 
18. Expect assignment. Do your best. 
19. Your primary focus is to serve, obey and hope to be found pleasing in all you provide and do.
20. Be of good health to be flexible as much as you can be for use. 

How to Use the Rules

1. Kneel in an attentive position in a safe place nude as if on assignment along with some paper and a pen.  

2. Read through all the rules in a whisper and feel in your heart how they sound to you. It may take you from hours to days to read through all the rules.  
3. Using the following to rate the rules by number or your chosen color code:

• Will do.
• Want to do, but will need a little push.
• Won’t do ever. In fact, if so required, will ask for release. 
• Find questionable and may be in need of a rewrite or elimination.
• Must do without question – an absolute need.

4. When finished with the rating – leave the rules alone for a bit and come back and do it again. Some decisions might change after the first time. 
5. You do not have to memorize all the rules you want to use. 
6. The rules are for building a mindset. 
7. Take the time to read your final selections often to help keep you in your place. 
8. Discuss your selections with your Master or with those you wish to consider to be taken by as you Master. Follow what is finally chosen and approved by your Master.

The 128 Rules

1. i will serve, obey and please my Master.

2. Above all else my primary focus shall be to please my Master, hoping that He finds me pleasing in all that I do, whether i am in His presence or not. my Master knows of my potential, learning more about me in each day i am with Him. He trusts that i will act in accordance with what He percieves of my potential – He knows what is best for me and how important it is that i set a good example for other females who may be present around me.

3. i worship my Master’s abilities and focus to keep me in my ‘place’ to serve His needs.

4. i worship every inch of my Master’s body.

5. The power of my Master fills me with awe. The sheer thought of Him or to hear His voice gives me strength and confidence to serve Him to the best of my abilities regardless of the circumstances going on in my life and His.

6. To receive pleasure i must not only earn it, but accept Master’s permission when it is granted to me. Pleasure is a gift and i must not ever abuse it in any way for it can be taken from me at any time.

7. i worship my Master’s whip whether it is used for His pleasure upon my flesh or to punish me for my behavior.

8. i trust my Master: His responsibilities, His skills, His hunger and needs, and His concern for my safety, my emotional, psychological, social, sexual, and physical health.

9. i am nothing more than an object of Master’s choosing to use for His needs. 

10. i will not act to satisfy my needs without Master’s permission.

11. my body and my mind are the property of my Master.

12. i must always give thanks to my Master for whatever He gives to me and do so in the manner i was taught by Him.

13. i must be specific and very explicit in my speech.

14. i will not hesitate to respond to my Master. 

15. i will thank my Master for the discipline and punishments i receive, specifying what i received and the reason as to why i was given them.

16. i have no will of my own accept to behave in the manner which Master has taught me, according to the rules He expects me to follow, seeking to be found pleasing by him in all i do, to listen when He teaches me, or to report to Him of my progress in serving Him and when given His guidance to do better.

17. i am always in submission to my Master whether He is present or not, ready to please Him at anytime, in any place, under any circumstances, regardless of who may be present. For the opportunity to submit and to please is by far more important and satisfying than any other pursuit. i trust my Master will keep me safe, protecting His reputation and mine in the presence of others, as He examines my ability to present myself to Him and to others in a subtle manner when required to protect our lifestyle from those who may not understand, nor support, as long as our behavior is not in anyway misrepresented nor misinterpreted by those who may be afar. i am to set, once again, a good example, ready to explain my position to others when required to do so. my lifestyle is a part of a growing culture for which i must never forget that i am an integral part.

18. All my choices shall be based upon whether or not they will please my Master.

19. When i am not in the presence of my Master and i have choices to make – i will perform them to the best of my abilities and within the boundaries and guidance He has allowed me.

20. i shall wear the collar my Master gives me with pride for it signifies His ownership of me and

my devotion to Him.

21. i shall wear the chains my Master gives me as a symbol of my position in life – that of bondage to Him. i shall wear them, as required, around my neck, my wrists, my ankles or around my waist.

22. When i am ready – i shall wear His rings to signify my submission to Him – one pierced through each nipple of my breasts and one through each labia of my pussy.

23. my mouth shall only be referred to as a cunt for it will often be used as if it were a pussy.

24. my sex shall only be referred to as a pussy.

25. When the cock of my Master is put into my cunt and i am directed to suck it – i will do so vigorously as long as i am required to do so. my hands shall be placed on the tops of my thighs, behind my neck or held at the base of my back so that during the sucking i can use my whole body to display my hunger to my Master.

26. my Master’s cum must never go to waste – i will swallow all of it when Master cums into my cunt (and be punished should I spill any of it from my lips), licking it up if Master cums into my hands or into a plate i hold in front of Him to receive it, or onto the food He gives me which He may require of me to hold just under His cock as He ejaculates over it. i will clean His cock thoroughly squeezing out every last drop. In rare and privileged cases i may wear my Master’s cum on my body, sometimes after massaging it into my skin. Cum is a gift from my Master and it is an honor to receive it. The eating of my Master’s cum will be counted as one of my meals for that day.

27. i worship my Master’s cock, its head and its shaft, especially when it is hard or when i am given the opportunity to make it hard for Him.

28. i will worship my Master’s ass only after a thorough washing of it. i shall do so hungrily, being sure to lick between the cheeks for as long as Master requires me to do so. i will use my hands to spread my Master’s cheeks apart.

29. i will never look into the eyes of my Master without his permission. To do so would be inappropriate of my position, and doing so could be interpreted by Him that i am seeking His attention or expecting Him to act – when such things are up to Him and to Him alone.

30. my head must be bowed down in the presence of my Master unless i am given permission to do so otherwise. i honor the position of my Master and it is important that i am not distracted in my submission to Him.

31. my eyes must be cast down in the presence of my Master unless i am given permission to do so otherwise. i am to focus on my behavior, waiting to act appropriately and without hesitation when directed to do so by Him.

32. i must always wear revealing and sexy clothing of good taste around my Master unless given permission to do so otherwise. The clothing i wear will allow easy access to my pussy, ass and breasts. The clothing will emphasize and often exaggerate my assets. i will wear such clothing in any kind of weather. How i present my body to Him or in front of others is more important than my discomfort and insecurities.

33. When others show an interest in what i am wearing i must ask them if they would like to see more and then gladly show them what they would like to see – but only after i have received permission from my Master – for i trust my Master’s judgement that such a display is not only reasonable but is safe to do.

34. i must remove all of my clothing in the way i have been taught when Master commands of me to do so – regardless of who may be present and despite where it is i am – i trust my Master.

35. When i remove clothing from my body it must be folded neatly and placed in a small pile in front of me just ahead of my feet or my knees if i should be required to be in my kneeling position after unclothing myself.

36. my basic attire in the presence of my Master shall consist of a collar and my highest heels. The rings of my submission, if i have been pierced, must also be attached to my body, as should the chains He has given or allowed me to wear.

37. my legs, underarms and pussy must be kept completely shaved smooth and clean so that nothing of me is hidden from view.

38. Unless otherwise given permission – my hair must be kept up in a manner that is ravishing so that my shoulders and the nape of my neck are fully exposed – especially when i am naked. It is important to Master that i appear not just attractive, but alluring and desirable.

39. Whenever i need to pick something up or receive something from someone else i must do so wherever possible by going into a kneeling position to show that i am honored to do so. i will perform this motion according to how Master has taught me.

40. my pussy and ass must be thoroughly washed and of a good aroma at all times, if even perfumed, but especially before serving my Master.

41. my “place” is on my knees before my Master, for it is a privilege and honor to be His slave.

42. When in the presence of my Master, but not in use, i will go to the place He has selected until i am needed by Him.

43. my greatest felt satisfaction is realized when i know i have pleased my Master.

44. There can be no greater pain or suffering i can feel then when Master is not pleased with me. Naturally i will feel depressed, saddened, empty, and lost. i can only hope He will show His mercy upon me and provide to me the guidance i will need to be put back on track so that i will be forgiven and once again be allowed His eyes upon my flesh, His touch upon my soul, and His warmth and love upon my heart.

45. my submission is a natural inborn feeling, and at times a surging and powerful force inside me that only a respectable and knowledgeable Master can recognize, control and manage, for a He understands how my nature influences my behavior and how temptations to act outside of its drive can easily lead me astray and away from my primary focus: to please and to be found pleasing. He, too, manages and controls His Own natural state, sharing with me through a power exchange between us, bonding me tightly to Him, His needs with mine. my submission to such a Master allows for me to feel more aware and alive inside and out, bringing me to a feeling i cherish: ‘ at home ‘.

46. i fear no other power for my Master is always with me.

47. i will not hesitate in my obedience to my Master.

48. Whenever Master speaks, even when i am speaking, i am to immediately become silent so i may be able to listen intensely to what He has to say. i must never interrupt Him unless He has shown me how to communicate with Him, if i need to. i must ask first for His permission to speak, specifying to whom i would like to speak to, and whether or not i may be allowed to speak freely – then and only then, if granted, may i say anything more than asking first to speak.

49. The opportunity to please my Master is very important to me and i will take every chance to seek out such opportunities to do so to the best of my abilities and in accordance to how i have been taught or allowed to do so.

50. i choose willingly to be treated as my Master’s property – as long as such treatment is safe and legal.

51. When Master feels i am ready and our relationship has progressed to a lifelong commitment, i shall be specially prepared to receive His unique and permanent mark of ownership upon my flesh, in a place of His choosing, whether it be a piercing, a tattoo or a branding. Thereafter, i shall become His property and slave in the most strict sense – completely His for as long as the relationship continues to be managed and controlled in the manner in which is beneficial to each of us and in accordance with our mutually shared natures.

52. i am my Master’s greatest treasure.

53. i will learn all the positions my Master wants to teach me to the best of my abilities and will be prepared to take such positions when required and to display myself in a manner through them that He, and others who may be present, will find most pleasing.

54. i must never reach orgasm without explicit permission from my Master. Failure to receive properly asked for permission and i will endure the punishment Master will put upon me without my safeword. Such pleasure must be seen as a privilege so that i do not take advantage of it.

55. The safeword given to me by my Master can be spoken at any time – even when i have been told to be silent. If i am not able to verbalize it – i trust my Master will show me how i can express it. Safewords are for my protection as well as His. i must be careful not to take more than i can handle, as He will need to know when to stop from getting carried away with His own passions – so that i may be prepared over time to endure more for Him.

56. my safeword, verbal or otherwise, cannot be used when i am being punished. i must remember that punishment could never be very effective if i were able to control it – i must take it in full measure – so that i will focus on the correction of my behavior for the long term, for unlike discipline, punishment is not what i will want again. i should know better. However, safewords can be used when i am being disciplined – Master will let me know which is which when the time has come that such treatment is necessary to correct my behavior.

57. i must confess to my Master when i have been naughty so that He may decide if such violations require me to be disciplined or to be punished. i must accept whatever decisions He makes by thanking Him for His choice – if He allows it before or shortly thereafter, specifying as to why i will be or have been disciplined or punished. i must focus upon how sorry i am for not behaving in the way in which i have been taught – for i have brought defilement upon myself and to Him an unacceptable act which is displeasing to Him.

58. i realize Master may own more than one slave, if He so chooses, and that i, unless allowed by Him, may never be able to have another Master other than Him, except by His choosing to further my training. i trust Master will take whatever precautions are necessary to keep the slaves He chooses to own sexually healthy and to provide whatever measures are necessary to protect us from the eruptions and ravages of any jealously which may try to corrupt the relationships our Master has allowed between each of us – including the one we each have with Him.

59. i must never be concerned when i feel too much of my flesh is showing, in private or in the general public – however, i can ask my Master for permission as to how to handle my discomfort.

60. i am a female slave – of worth and value to any Master who would find me useful. my role has been clearly brought into definition through my ability to recognize and to act accordingly with my true nature, enhanced through the teachings of my Master, and through the continued practice of my primary focus, and my search for every opportunity to do so.

61. my Master will decide what my sexual orientation shall be. i will commit myself to His decision and perform as such only in His presence and only with His permission. i know my performance will be measured and corrected as He sees fit should i be required to attend to, provide myself to, perform with, or upon another female slave.

62. i must tell my Master if i have had an orgasm without His permission so that i can be properly punished for my disobedience and disrespect.

63. Pain and pleasure shall be with me always – in my thoughts and my fantasies – for the contrast strengthens me to behave in the manner my Master expects of me. Such thoughts and fantasies are tainted with the memories i have from the last time i was in the presence of my Master. He is with me always.

64. my limits do not have to be respected – i trust my Master to take me past them when He expects that i am ready – for each side of the wall of my limitations is both pleasurable and a challenge – one side more intense than the other. My only hope in such transferences is that Master will be able to take me there again and again as my relationship to Him progresses through time, that He too will need it as much as i will, and that He will not be afraid to increase the intensity while we are there.

65. i have much to learn in order to become a well-trained and well-behaved slave.

66. i will endure whatever discipline or punishment my Master gives me so i can become a better slave for Him.

67. i will work on building up my tolerances to the level my Master needs me to have, being careful not to push myself further or faster than i am ready to endure for Him, so that i may be able to expand my limitations and increase my value to Him.

68. Through discipline and punishment i shall learn to behave.

69. In bondage i am made free.

70. i will never touch my breasts, nipples, pussy or clit with my hands or sex toys in any manner where i could experience sexual or sensual pleasure without permission from my Master including washing them, shaving my pussy, adjusting my breasts as i fit them into clothing, or in attaching my rings.

71. Only through submission can i find my true self.

72. my life is empty without a Master to please – that lost feeling inside can be real and it can grow. i may be able to step away from the hunger of my nature, but not for long, for soon it could effect every part of my life. It is important that i seek a Master to please – but if i cannot find one or that i shall not be found, i am not totally lost for i must always remember: i will survive – for it is my nature to do so. my drive to please can be adapted towards the needs of others even though they may not be as satisfying as the one i would have towards a Master. i must keep in the back of mind that there is a Master who is looking too and that i need to be patient by redirecting my needs in other ways where i can provide pleasure to others.

73. i shall never think of myself as a weak person for it takes a strong female to commit to the drive inside me, to serve, to obey and to please a Master. i too have responsibilities and as natural as they may seem to me it is important that i use all of my faculties including my creative spirit to submit to a Master in a unique fashion personal to my relationship with Him. By doing so i hope to provide a good example to those females around me who may still be learning so they too are not led astray from their primary focus, that they are as true to their nature as i strive to continue to be to mine. i must remember that how i well i behave enlightens and empowers me to become even closer to who i am – a devoted slave, of good rapport to a Master who truly understands my needs in relationship to His own.

74. i will give all that i am to my Master in order to become free.

75. i must never show disrespect towards my Master in any way – no matter where i am – in his presence or not.

76. Crying and the shedding of tears at any time is good and expected for it softens my will and bonds me closer to my Master.

77. Only in complete submission to my Master shall i realize the depth of the love i have for Him.

78. The needs of my Master must always come first before mine own for they offer an opportunity to please Him.

79. i must be attentive to the needs of my Master and always be ready to respond to them to the best of my abilities and in the unique ways in which i have chosen and have developed for Him.

80. i am allowed to suggest ways to further my training or use of me, verbally or through my journal, as long as i address my Master properly first.

81. i must always respond fully both physically and verbally to whatever my Master does with me. The expressions of my emotions and my physical responses are important to Him. i must never hold back any part of their display, regardless of how intense they may be, unless restricted to do so.

82. i am a sexual and sensual being.

83. i must always remember how pleased my Master is when others delight in my sexiness as a result of my ability to show off my assets.

84. my behavior must always display a sexual content however subtle.

85. The only clothing i will buy and wear will be those items which my Master would find pleasing to Him: fitting to my figure and its assets, of good quality, of reasonable cost, and appropriate in His eyes and taste for the occasions i am allowed to attend with or without Him. i may ask if i may choose what to wear so i may be able take an opportunity to surprise Him to win His favor.

86. i may, at times, offer various parts of my body to my Master in hopes He will take pleasure in using them in whatever ways He wishes. my only hope will be that my offering will please Him. If not, i want Him to punish me.

87. It is important for me to eat plenty of carbohydrates, proteins and vitamins in the foods and fluids i am permitted to choose to nourish my body and mind, and to exercise my body regularly, as permitted by my Master, to increase my physical strength, to keep my limbs as flexible as possible, and to maintain or improve my figure so i may be able to endure my Master’s use of me however intense and for however long a period is required by Him. i want to be of a healthy and sound mind and body, free as possible of any personal limitations, when pleasing my Master.

88. If i am required to be my Master’s toilet, into or onto which He chooses to release the watery juices of His cock, i shall position myself to receive His personal waters by kneeling for Him, tilting my head back, opening my cunt wide, and closing my eyes so that He will delight in the display and offering of my body and of one of my orifices for Him choose upon which one to use. i shall remain still as He releases Himself, swallowing what i can of the waters He allows me. i shall play with myself during the release, as is instructed by Him, so that i am permitted to sexualize the experience as much as possible for His pleasure, thanking Him afterwards for allowing me the opportunity to honor Him in this most private way.

89. i will not wear a pad or tampon when i am on my period without His permission – my pussy must be available for His use at all times. Should i be allowed to use a pad or tampoon – it must be removed in His presence should He require my vagina to be emptied – regardless of where i am and who may be present. The use of a pad or tampoon is a privilege that can be taken away from me at any time. If so, i can only hope i will be allowed to bleed for His pleasure and to feel my blood trickling down my legs or to strain to hear it drip onto the floor or onto another female slave he has selected to punish with my blood.

90. If Master has chosen my sexual orientation to that of being bisexual, and He requires of me to receive the watery juices or blood of a chosen female slave’s pussy, i am to position myself, as i would for Master, to receive upon my flesh or into my cunt the slave’s juices, and if permitted to do so, either through His command or after receiving permission from Him to display for Him my hunger, i will cup my cunt tightly to the slave’s pussy to feed from her, licking and sucking, if allowed to do so, as much as I can get from her remaining tightly cupped to her until Master allows me to release myself from her. Thereafter, i am to be thankful for what i have received and for the privilege He allowed me. Such a feeding will be counted as one of my meals for the day.

91. If it is possible to practice my basic attire in my household i will do so. i will remove my clothing immediately after entering my household putting my collar on first, then my rings and chains (if i have them), and my highest heels.

92. i will always sleep nude – kneeling first before i enter my bed and kneeling first as soon as i get out of my bed – for it is a great privilege to have a bed to sleep on.

93. i must never tighten my body when it is being whipped, caned, cropped, slapped, paddled, belted, strapped, spanked, bullwhipped, signal whipped, or anally or vaginally pumped. my Master likes it when my flesh jiggles and He knows that when i tighten my body it hurts more and inhibits my ability to display my expressions and emotions.

94. i am proud to wear upon my body the marks given to me by my Master. i know that my Master will never mark me permanently – other than the mark of His ownership He will give me at the proper time, but i will gladly suffer for Him so he can mark me with the stripes he wishes to decorate my body with for His viewing pleasure.

95. i will always listen with a strong interest in whatever my Master has to say during my training. i want to learn all that i can from Him so i can understand more about Him, about me, about the bdsm scene and community, and those involved in bdsm relationships – so i may be able to better understand the world i am apart of and be able to communicate it accurately to anyone who wishes to know more about it.

96. When i take a shower i can do so the way i like to, but when i have finished washing i must rinse my entire body with only cold water for not less than 2 full minutes. i am not to try to cover my body with my arms and hands thereafter. i may use a towel to dry off, but in my Master’s house – only His whip shall be used to dry me.

97. When i walk, run, sit, stand, kneel, reach out, speak, or listen – i will do so in a sexual manner, however subtle, and with confidence and pride hoping other females around me will feel my projection upon them, that my performance is found admirable, that they would seek to emulate me without any of their insecurities or self-conscious thoughts holding them back. I want to set the best example of proper female behavior – especially if Master or someone He has chosen is nearby to examine and monitor it. However, my goal must be to behave as naturally and freely as is possible as if without any effort on my part.

98. When standing still i shall do so with my feet and legs together, my hands held behind my back and my head bowed down. i will remain silent in the way Master has taught me.

99. If required: the plug Master has provided me must be inserted deeply into my pussy before arriving at my Master’s house. Failure to do so and i shall feel the punishment He will give upon my pussy as i keep the lips of it pulled apart – for the plug was intended to provide me pleasure.

100. i hope Master will choose to use my tongue as His towel after His shower so i may be able to worship His body.

101. Until Master has chosen it is time for me to wear a more permanent mark of ownership upon my flesh, i shall proudly wear His temporary mark of ownership upon me wherever He chooses to place it.

102. When sitting i shall sit up straight with my legs together and my palms down on the top of my thighs.

103. i will not speak to others without my Master’s permission except to say to them that they will have to speak to my Master first. This is especially important at play parties.

104. i shall learn to the endure the whippings Master gives me by using the technique of saying ‘ YES ‘ through each of His strike brought down upon my flesh.

105. i shall gladly make my body available to my Master to be used as furniture: my body positioned to decorate a room or a garden, a footstool to rest his weary feet and legs upon, my backside as a His table to eat off of, the cleavage of my breasts to hold his wine glass, my palms to be used to hold a plate of His food, or my hands to hold a book open for Him to read or a lamp to for Him to see.

106. Privacy is a privilege – even to have it when i need to use the bathroom. i must ask for it and accept my Master’s decision even when i am denied of it.

107. As a helper slave i shall assist my Master in the setting of a scene or in the training and use of other female slaves.

108. As a preparer slave i shall ready other female slaves for my Masters use, harden His cock for Him, or harden the cocks of others He allows me to harden.

109. As a cleaner slave i shall use my tongue to clean the cum of my Master from the body of a female slave He has put it upon, my cunt to suck for it from a female slave’s pussy my Master has used for His pleasure, or to clean the cocks i am allowed to clean that have been pulled out of the pussies of other slaves. For as a cleaner slave i am to lick up what semen i can find.

110. As a provider slave i shall offer parts of my body to those selected by my Master for their pleasure. i will also offer myself to those who wish to use me for a demonstration or to experiment on.

111. As a domestic slave i shall perform chores about my Master’s house, and those of others He allows, acting in a sexual and enticing manner in all that i do.

112. As a sex slave i shall incorporate a sexual attitude and hunger in everything i do, being eager to sexually perform at the best of my abilities for my Master and for those whom He allows to use me. my hunger must be such that i would feel as if i could never be satiated until Master allows me to be.

113. The beginning and the ending of a day shall always be with a full body whipping and a cockfeeding to remind me of my place or to provide myself to my Master for His first and last use.

114. When i have been given permission to play with myself i shall do so in the following manner: working my clit almost to an orgasm and then stopping for a few minutes, then working it again to almost at orgasm and then stopping for a few minutes, and then finally working it again to a full orgasm. Then and only then shall i enjoy an orgasm on my own. Should i cum before the third tier – i will tell my Master so i may be punished. i will play with myself in this manner even in His presence.

115. Should Master ever wish to cage me for display, i will gladly crawl into it and proudly position myself in it in ways He finds pleasing, in solitude and quiet, so that if He chooses, others may delight in what they see without any interruption from me, seeing that i am well-behaved and humbled that i am Master’s property and slave. i can only hope that Master would never put me into a cage to confine me for my misbehavior, that i could never come that close to displease Him so much that i would have to suffer such humiliation, begging with my tears and my cries for his forgiveness, for i want the cage to be my safe haven from my fears, a place i can crawl into of my own free will, locked into it because Master granted my request to be locked in it.

116. i am free to leave my Master at any time without the fear of permanently losing Him as my Master.

117. At the beginning of my relationship with my Master i shall present to Him three names for Him to decide upon as to which one will be my slave name. i know that He does not have to choose any of them and that He can choose one of His own for me to be known by. Thereafter, when someone asks who i am i can respond by introducing myself in the following manner: ” i am slave [slavename], property of Master John.”

118. i will periodically examine my whole life and look for how it has changed as a result of my relationship to my Master. i will speak to my Master about those areas where there have been improvements and those areas where i feel uncomfortable, insecure, or unsure of what direction i should take, how i should behave, or how i can behave in a manner that is different than how i have been behaving in the past.

119. i want to suffer for my Master in ways that please Him and that are safe for me to do so.

120. i will not be passive in serving my Master. i will aggressively participate in my exchange with Him.

121. If i am sent to another Master to serve – i will serve that Master well, as if He were my Master, for i want my Master to receive a good report after i have been returned to Him.

122. Should Master wish for my breasts to be suckled by a female slave of His choice or that legal and safe drugs be used to induce the production of milk in my breasts, i will do my best to keep my milk up so that He and others may feed from me, that my breasts will be full, tight and extra sensitive as much as possible, for however long Master wants my breasts to produce milk for Him. Likewise, i will assist in the inducement of milk production from the breasts of any female slave Master has chosen for me.

123. i will not date others or form a relationship with others without permission and approval from my Master. If i should have sex with others i will have it safely and will always tell my Master in detail what i have done so that no part of me is a secret and that i am laid bare for his inspection and approval.

124. The money i earn, should i be allowed a career, or put to work, where i am paid for my responsibilities, is mine to keep. However, i must ask my Master how i should spend or save it. i may present ways to Him for His approval. i will accept the responsibilities He gives me in the handling of my finances. It is important to my Master that i learn to handle money wisely so, if needed, i can reach my goals or be ready for any emergency where finances may be required for resolution.

125. If i am wearing a dress or skirt and no panties and i am going to sit down – i must sit on my bare skin – and do so gracefully whether i am in private or in public. If i feel that i am not as clean as i should be, i will tell my Master, so that He can decide what should be done.

126. When i wear nylons i will wear them only with garters and high heels. i will never wear panty hose – such items of clothing shall be thrown out.

127. When i am in the presence of my Master and i am free to move about i will do so in seductive and enticing ways.

128. i will give to Master my body, mind and spirit, in faith of His knowledge of the skills, safety and first aid measures necessary to put me through painfully ecstatic and euphoric edgeplay: the use of needles and pins to pierce my flesh; the use of scoring tools to make drawings upon my body or to selectively and carefully cut my skin to make me bleed with little or no scarring; aromatherapy where He will throw me into higher states of consciousness with the scents of oils and incense; blood and breath control to bring me to the edge of my survival to feel the battle for my self-preservation; guns and knifeplay to intensify my awareness of my existence racing parallel with my threatened drive to live; and other such uses. Through these activities i shall learn to ride on the top edge of my fears and the bottom edge of my perception of utter terror – for it is there i shall come to know my greatest fear of all: that i will want to go there again and again.

The end.

by Johnathan Kay
(Warning: This is not sex positive. It’s proudly privileged.)

http://128rulesguy.blogspot.com/2011/07/128-rules-for-female-slave.html?zx=1d02ee047909b312

Do You Just Please , What About The Kink

Lets face it we are living the dream, the lifestyle allows us to be free , it allows us to be who and what we are.

When your Dominant enjoys things you do not , do you do them anyway just to please, or does it please you knowing you have made him happy ?

Do you follow rules , protocols just to please or do you get satisfaction out of knowing you have done well ?

Do you dress as your told , does it make you happy your owner is pleased ?

The list can actually go on and on and the longer we are together the longer the list can get.

Are you completely honest prior to entering a relationship when it comes to your needs , or do you just go with the flow ?

If you meet someone and the need is Anal , and that is something your against would you follow through just to please or would you keep that as a hard limit and risk the relationship?

The pain side of things do you except pain just to please or do you take it because you truly enjoy it ? Are you in fear of losing the relationship if you do not play along ?

Is your Dominant available 24/7 if not why ? This is something that is very important not only for support , but your communication , and training, your Dominant being available 24/7 is your right.

Your kink may not be your Doms , or your Doms kink may not be yours, are you going to give in and do things you do not like.

where do you draw the lines when it comes to your limits or are they really limits? Are your limits just set in your mind ? Have you tried what you call your limits ? Many times once in a long term relationship what were your limits most of the time become no limits ?

How deep is your submission ? Is it bedroom only ? Is it when your Dominant is around ? Is it 24/7 ? Maybe you live in a TPE Total Power Exchange ? Are you a submissive , a Baby Girl , a Pet , A slave?

How serious are you about your submission ? Is serving someone a true need for you ? Will giving up control put you in the place you need to be?

All of the above are questions you need to ask yourself , and knowing exactly  what your needs are will help you be in a better place..

Vile

 

 

 

 

Your Passwords.

Your Password is just that yours. No matter the relationship we need some source of privacy.

Trust is a major issue no matter what type of relationship your in, be it Vanilla or Submissive , more so if you have stepped into that Slave role in life.

I as Arianna , Master and Owner have the right to look at anything I want and at times I do pick up her cell and strum through it. At one point she did give me her passwords to all of her accounts but I no longer have. She has no Social Media accounts nor does she care to have.

Now lets turn the tables around , I am driving and I receive a text or email , or maybe an alert from Twitter , ill ask Arianna to read what ever it is to me, all of my emails are open , Facebook , twitter , everything , she as well has full access to anything.  Does this make me weak ? Does this make me Non Dominant ? The way I see it is it makes me open and I have nothing to hide, coming back to that trust thing.

All Dominants are different , Masters and Owners our needs are different, what I am posting about is my personal stance.

This happens mostly when a Dom is married and stepping out or a Dom could have a control issue , ego problems but most of the time it is a security problems meaning the Dom is insecure.

There are those who are insecure who have to bully their authority , who used fear to try and force submission. Fear and submission never works and when it does it is only for a short time. The out come of such a relationship could be devastating to the one who is submitting, not only on an emotional scale but mental.

Being open is very important in any relationship more so when it comes to a D’s or M’s relationship. A friend of mine at a MAsT meeting a couple of months ago made the statement. I can only make and informed decision based on the information that is giving to me, now that is deep. That is why it is so important to be able to communicate and receive the communication back. If you ask a direct question you should expect a direct answer, but it goes both ways.

A year or so ago Arianna came up with this idea , if she was to give me her passwords to all of her emails it would give me more control. I agreed but today I could not tell you what they are.

I myself cannot think of a reason why I would need such information, I however I felt like I needed them there would be a trust issue and I would no longer need your services…

If you have just met someone and you give out everything it can really fuck up your life in a big way and the effects could last for a very long time.

Keep your passwords

Vile