Archive for the Consistency Category

She Is Your Bitch Run Your House

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, adapting, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, BDSM Relationships, Behavior Modification, Consistency, Master And Slave, Punishment, Slave, Submission, Submissive, training your slave with tags , , , on March 26, 2018 by thekinkyworldofvile

I have had a few Dominants approach me , telling me that they let their feelings get in the way. When it comes to control , punishing or even giving out task , the biggest is when it comes to enforcing rules. The feeling of guilt like you are abusing someone , mistreating , being unfair , being to strict. Well! You did not have these feelings before you entered the relationship ,or when you both agreed to enter the relationship , you had everything planned out right ? You told the Submissive you were a dominant , you told her you wanted to take control , you gave out rules right?

Many over time begin to get this deep sense of guilt , like everything is abuse , maybe mistreating their partner but remember these are thing that were agreed on before you entered the relationship , so was it just Dom frenzy or maybe just a deep fantasy and instead.

When you both sit down and start talking about each others needs and most important what they Dominant lays out about how he envisions how the house will be ran. It is okay as a slave or submissive to express your feelings but to be outright argumentative is nothing more than disrespect and should not be tolerated. When should you question your Master ? When you see a bad decision  is going to affect you and your house , put you in danger or possibly homeless. This should include while out in public , if you have something to say it should be in private , calling your Master out in public is nothing more than being disrespectful. If there are no consequences to ones actions then the Master is no longer in control.

Neither Master or slave should be afraid to speak up , if you do not communicate the slave in a respectful manner the Master has no way of knowing what you are thinking or what problems you may have until you the slave blows up.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master/slave_(BDSM)

In BDSM, Master/slave or M/s is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures.[1] The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term “slave” because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave’s body, as property or chattel. While male “masters” will usually be referred to as “Master”, whether or not female Masters are referred to as “Master” or “Mistress” may depend upon whether they identify as following the “Leather” or BDSM path.[1]:27-30

The Master/slave (or owner/property) relationship is entered into on a consensual basis, without the legal force of historical or modern non-consensual slavery, that is forbidden by the laws of most countries.

Keeping that head space , one the collar if you the slave should ever have a doubt about your position in the home then reach up and grab your collar , if your Master requires you to wear one. It seems today very few Master require a collar for what ever reason , maybe he does not want to spend the money on one or he simply does not care. Putting rituals and protocols in place. Putting things in place even slave positions keeps the head space and is a reminder. Everything put in place has to be consistent or they will not work.

http://www.bdsmwiki.info/Protocol

A protocol is any defined, enforced code of behavior, and or rituals whether it be within the confines of a particular group, community, or other interpersonal dynamic (such as a power exchange relationship).

Protocols are a set of governing rules that dictate the body, behavior and attitudes through an enforced code of behavior and/or rituals whether it be within the confines of a particular group, community, or interpersonal dynamic.

Protocols are often referred to those found within a power exchange relationship. The reason there is no set rules about universal protocols is because every power exchange relationship is different, not just based on relationship style, but more specifically on the individuals involved in the relationship and their needs and wants.

Best Practices indicate that it is unreasonable to expect that others should or must respect your particular set of protocols if you have not negotiated for such things with them.

Why would a Master argue with a slave ? What sense does it make for either to even argue with each other? If a Master will argue with his slave then he becomes the bitch.

The Master

http://bdsmwiki.info/Master

Values , and this is interesting….

Some commonly emphasized values consistent with best practices concerning a Master may include but are not limited to: (in no particular order)

  • Honorable behavior in word and deed.
  • Is in touch with their wants and needs; gives clearly stated expectations, orders and instructions.
  • A clear understanding of their own personal limitations and failings while consistently seeking to learn more and better themselves.
  • The ability to respect and forgive the personal limitations and failings of those that serve them while still helping them push towards and achieve self betterment.
  • Possession of sound judgement, logic, reliability and the ability to keep their personal affairs in reasonable order.
  • An amazing degree of control of temper and impulse.
  • Recognizes both service and Mastery as callings worthy of respect.

You set the rules , you sit the rules and protocols and you enforce consistently ,  Your house you the Master sets up how things will be ran. Many at sometime will begin to feel guilty about enforcing rules or afraid of rejection , or maybe even your slave will leave you. It is the slave who has to adapt to your way of living.

You cannot change up the rules after you have put them in place , rules can be amended but there are some who will change just so they can punish.

Keeping that head space , protocols and rituals along with a few slave positions , all of these not only induce good behavior but they are a training tool. Having to ask permission to do anything and everything even when it comes to scheduling a free day with family or friends.

Use your property and use on a regular basis , the slave is there for your use , your enjoyment and it is up to you if you let your slave get off. Play and do not share what you plan on doing but it is good to give warnings throughout the week. Take what you want when you want and how you want , this will also keep your slave in that head space.

A good Master shows control , not only at home but while out it is the Master who sets the example. The way your slave acts in public is a direct reflection of your training.

Do not make demands that are not reasonable , do not make demands that will set the slave up for failure. Do not make demands that would cause the slave harm or get into trouble.

Positive reinforcement goes along way , several times a week I tell my girls how much I appreciate them and the things they do. Reward when the slave does something good. The system put in place should be everything is earned nothing is giving. All of the privileges are just that privileges and anything can be taken back.

Restrict the space with in the home the slave is allowed to sit and the way the slave sits. While out my girls sit with hands in lap and are prohibited from crossing their legs. While standing the hands are clasped in front. All of these are reminders of the slaves position within the home.

The Master needs down time a time to relax clear your head , time alone , this is just as important as the slave having down time..

You can change plans when they are not working but never change goals.

 

My Dark Side

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, anal sex, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Protocols, Consensual, Consistency, fucking, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, I own every hole, sex slave, Slave, Submission, Submissive, sucking cock, Total Power Exchange with tags , , , , , , on March 4, 2018 by thekinkyworldofvile

I am like a perennial flower , you think I am gone , then Boom I pop back up.

 

I suppose we all have thoughts and most of us even have fantasies and the same with both , somethings are just better off left as thoughts or fantasies. Sometimes our sexual desires can even become dark , the art of controlling every move , tied up , with a hood , total darkness. I have a set of leather cuffs that was made just for Arianna , and I love chain , thick chain then pad locked. If you use rope if someone wants out bad enough they can do it , it may take a while but one can escape. The Hood I have is made from spandex but it has a blindfold inside , so there is total darkness. I believe there may be a touch of fear when one loses their sight.

I suppose as a Dominant we all at some point come up with what we consider to be twisted thoughts. I am not speaking of any physical harm , I do not like putting any type of marks or bruises on my property , I am more mental , I enjoy being in the head , all the mind fucks , the not knowing.

I have been thinking of like a breaking weekend , kinda like a kidnapping , of course part role play but the not knowing what will happen. Just using for a whole weekend not saying a word. A couple of months ago I made a nice spreader bar and have yet to use it , timing has been one thing it seems we are always busy.

I find a few things to be humiliating and one of my favorite is face fucking , man I love that gagging feeling , and that sounds like a song to me. While sex is not the most important part of a relationship , there are somethings that are important to me and one is oral sex , I have had many a blowjobs but have came across very few who were either really good at it or those who tried really hard and was just not there. Anal sex is very important to me , the reason it is about submission , submission in my eyes. I not only want every hole , I need every hole.

I have acquired a few toys one being something I have been after for a long time and that is a spanking bench , the other was giving to me is a really nice fucking machine. The machining is almost brand new and was very expensive when first purchased. The girls do not really care for it but I enjoy watching it being used.

I like being in control , I take that back I need to be in control , I am in control of not only my life , my surroundings , and if I make a mistake then everything falls on me. I am in control at work for the most and 99% of the time I get what I want.

As a Dominant you have to be able to separate your feelings , you can still care for and even love , but when it comes to using what is yours , you have to be in a different frame of mind. What happens often is a Dominant will start to feel guilty , the feeling of guilt when playing , you start to grow a soft side and when you do this it changes who you were when the two of you first met. When you change , when you let your feelings get in the way , your slave will be the first to notice the difference , the mindset of the slave will change and will start to push barriers. Once you lose control of the mindset , once you lose control , it is impossible to regain. The slave has already seen that soft side , the side of feeling guilty and there is no turning back.

Just as you train your slave , you the dominant has to train your mind , this is a mistake I made more than once and I always wanted to blame the slave. It is very important to lay all of your needs on the table when you start to negotiate the relationship , If you truly have a need for something do not give in , this just means the slave you have met is not the one for you. If you do give in , the subject will come up again at some point and you cannot go back on your word.

We take 1 we give back 5 , what I am talking about is the more we take the more we have to give back. We must remain positive and give positive feed back , we need to give that reassurance , we need to praise even at times when not needed. I express my appreciation all the time , even telling I appreciate everything you are doing after all it makes my life easier.

To train is to change someones thought process , make changes in ones behavior , make changes to fit your needs. The mindset of the Dominant who own , your slave is valued property. The slave is for your use , be it for service , communicating , or sexual. Lets drop the kink side of things for just a second. Once you are inside the head , you know what makes the slave tick , the thought process , why the slave does certain things , the decisions that are made , to include their interest , likes and dislikes , foods and movies , music. Days that are special , Birthdays , Holidays , places the slave likes to visit , you get to the point you know the slave better than they do , then and only then can you begin true training.

You pile on a bunch of senseless rules that has no meaning , except to worship your cock , or not allowed to wear panties or maybe a bra. Those rules have zero meaning , the only benefit you get is getting your dick sucked but that comes later because you want the slave to want to please you .

I am huge on Behavior modification but it has to be consensual , agreed on with both Master and Slave and it has to be a need for the slave , a true need.  The relationship needs to be consensual , there needs to be negotiations prior to an agreement. You do not have to explain what your training will consist of , or when it will start.  If you explain anything a rule , maybe a protocol you explain it in such detail there are no questions.

Just because a rule is broken does not mean punishment , after all there are mistakes. Life does happen , things get in the way , if there is a resistance to something talk and find out what the root of the problem is. If a rule is broken does not mean you beat the slaves ass or smack them around , you sit down and talk like two adults and find out what happened. My two favorite words are Choices and Consequences. There has to be consequences to ones choices , just as there has to be rewards for the good that has been done. If we as Dominants take one we give back 10 , if we take two we give back 20. We have to give more than we take.

I have thoughts , thoughts of just rough raw fucking , like maybe a rape scene , or kidnapping , long hours of bondage and humiliation. My favorite before anal is face fucking , probably the biggest rush for me , the control and at times the forcing.

Maybe I am not as dark as I thought looking back over what I have written , to me I am normal. I do know when you are in control you are making decisions for two or three depending on your home , but everything is on the Dominants shoulders.

I get pleasure from using what is mine , I get pleasure in using as I see fit to please me.

Vile

 

 

 

 

Obtaining Deeper Submission

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, codependent, Consistency, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Training your submissive with tags , , , , on December 12, 2017 by thekinkyworldofvile

Deeper submission is something wanted by both the Dominant and the Submissive , however many times the submissive will want but is clueless about how to achieve such a goal. This falls onto the Dominants shoulders in guiding the submissive.

While trust is a huge factor there has to be some guidance , in assisting the submissive reach their goals.

Training is huge , it will be the main factor in not only the Dominants goals but the submissive’s as well.  I have said this before having a plan before you begin training is a valuable asset , having goals , setting rules and protocols. I have found it to be difficult to implement any rules until you truly know someone. You can add rules or take rules away but to alter a rule can had adverse effects. Rules are to enhance the submissive or slaves life. While protocols are meant to enhance the control of the Master or you could say protocols are rituals. The last sentence were words from my slave Arianna.

I myself begin training and continue without my slave knowing , I am going to try and explain some different methods but training will vary from submissive to submissive or slave to slave. Each personality is different , needs are different and habits are different.

I was speaking with another Dom yesterday and I was explaining he had to be able to define himself and know what he wanted in a submissive and what his final goals would be. It sounds pretty simple yes? Well truth be known it is not simple and it is a lot of work and it is work that is continued for the long term. I was chatting with a Gorean Master who takes in part time slaves for a weekend , a week , a month , 6 months and so on but nothing is set for long term. My time is more valuable than that but I also realize we are both on different playing fields. I do however use some of the Gorean rituals and protocols.

First your potential partner must be real and serious, by this time you should of seen if it is what I call sub frenzy , or just a fantasy because once someone steps into your world it is game over.

When you the Master explains something it should be in such great detail , when you are finished there are no questions , but you will ask if there are any questions , this is done each time.

What is wrong ? That question is so lame it has no meaning and should be dropped from your vocabulary. Instead try this, What is on your mind? Boom the first question puts up a defensive wall , guarded not letting you in. What is on your mind? What are you thinking? If there is anything the words will flow like a water fall I promise you, this will make life show much easier.

A Dominant or Master should never lose your temper when it comes to your property. Anger shows a lack of control , if you cannot control your anger how can you control someone else?  You must be respected before you can expect someone to submit. Five years I have never raised my voice towards my slave or my submissive 5 fucking years. Why? My slave Arianna is in service to me as with Lynn , both serve me , both take care of my needs. Both respect me and both depend on me , I have never used fear as a form of Domination .

Training you must be fair and the few rules you have in place should not be changed or altered. Now this is just my opinion and it works and worked for me.

Everything is earned , nothing is giving and what is earned can be taken away at the snap of a finger and this must be known.

Sitting at the dinner table is a privilege not a right. Sitting on the couch or chair is a privilege not a right, watching TV , texting friends , using a pad , showering , doing hair, nail polish everything is a privilege and privileges are earned not giving.

You the Master wants full and complete control , you the Master wants nothing less than full submission. You the Master wants loyalty , you want your needs met service and sexual.

Clothes in the house should be a privilege , I myself do not allow any clothes on unless I approve , but I am dressed , my right not a privilege.

Trust , Trust is HUGE , Trust is the main factor in the beginning of any relationship but even more so in our lifestyle. You can forget about any level of submission until you have full TRUST. You the Master will ask the Submissive or Slave do you trust me? The answer will always be YES. Dude it is a LIE a big FAT LIE there is no Trust there they don’t even really know you , why would you even ask such a question? Do you know why the answer was yes? Because it is what you wanted to hear and nothing more. You will know when the Trust begins and it will not happen over night. Now while you have been building this thing called TRUST you can fuck it up and the drop of a pin , meaning the first time you get stupid , lose your temper , screaming , calling names out of anger and if you can and that is a HUGE if you can start to rebuild what you fucked up.

Controlling your temper is much like gaining trust it does take time and it took me a very long time to learn how to channel my anger into something positive. Thinking before you speak will be your best friend , taking that deep breath , a silent deep breath and think about what you are going to say. That one short pause can save you weeks or months of work.  If you have anger issues you have zero business trying to own or be someones Dominant. Do I get mad? Absolutely I do I blow the fuck up but and there is a but not at my girls. Never. Remember they are in service to me.

Here comes the needy , here comes the codependency , but first things first I have to say because I will get a fucked email , not every submissive or slave is codependent , there I said it so deal with it. At any rate here it comes and it will hit you like a fucking train and you the Dom will deal with it because remember ? You wanted a relationship , this was the one and you are now president and will have to take that call at 3 am or what ever time 24/7. You have to be there 24/7 because you agreed to it and you said you would. So man up.

Actions speak louder than words , Actions are everything , Actions are visuals and we as humans are Visuals we see and for the most we believe even when it comes to watching news. You know what I am talking about so the visual comment is real. Actions mean everything. You sat your submissive down and you painted this white knight on this beautiful horse riding down the trail and swooping the submissive up and taking her back to your kingdom. You opened the can of worms now either you man up or you tell the truth , hey I am just looking for a quick fuck and nothing more. Be Honest.

Say what you mean and do what you say , actions speaks louder than words , you can now start building that bridge of trust. You will know when trust is achieved because a whole new room will open up and you will see a whole new openness , you will see a whole new person , someone who now desires to please , someone who has the need to please.

I love the word USE , and the word should be used often when you first begin your training. Sex is much different in our lifestyle mainly because in my eyes it is my right to use my property when and how I want , again the word USE. In the beginning stages using your submissive plays a very important role and there are two reasons. One it sets the scene and two it puts your submissive in her place. Now comes the hard part like when in a vanilla relationship the male spends much of his time begging to get some pussy , while the Dominant see’s sex as being a right. Sex is about me and only me. Yeah sounds pretty cold but there are times I will please but that type of pleasure is my call. Using your property is a reminder , it puts one in their place.

Taking privileges away , what was once so cherished now becomes a privilege as I stated above. Again everything is earned and what is earned can be taken back at any time. Limit the places in your home in which the submissive has access to , such as a spot on the floor next to the couch yea that one and only spot. Sitting next to you on the floor while you eat, and the submissive must not begin to eat until you have taken the first bite.

I find speaking in thirds to be very effective taking the words I and me out of the vocabulary . Replacing with your submissive or this submissive. Your Slave or this slave , the words I or me no longer has any meaning. This is a reminder of who and what she is and what her place in within the home.

This is done on a daily basis you cannot train 4 days and take 3 off it breaks the cycle. Your property will make mistakes and and verbal correction is all that is needed. The first 90 days will be the toughest but you should start to see things fall into place. Some catch on faster than others and raising your voice or beating her ass make no sense.

You cannot demand submission if you do it is fake submission. You cannot demand love if you do again it it fake love. Putting fear in someone makes no sense , you gain absolutely nothing with the exception of a swollen ego.

Respect your property and never ask them to do something you yourself would not do. Never ask for anything that is totally unrealistic , or something that would cause someone to fail. Always be positive and praise goes a long , long way.

I give reminders all the time to both of my girls , hey you know I truly appreciate everything you do. This is positive reinforcement , it is a builder and makes one feel proud and will want to please more.

I am not sure if I left anything out?

I Am Going To Use You

Posted in Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, commitment, Consistency, control, Master and slave relationship, Punishment, Slave, Structure, Submission, Submissive, training your slave, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 25, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

I want to be your friend , I want to be your best friend , I want to know everything about you  starting with your earliest memories. I want to know the foods you like, movies , music, hobbies.

I want to be by your side , I want to be the shoulder  you lean on , I want to be the one you know you can depend on. I want to hold you so I can feel your inner soul , your thoughts and your needs. I want inside your mind including the good and bad . I want to know your thoughts at all times, but most of all I want you to know you can come to me and speak openly. I want you to feel as if you can speak to me without fear , this is a need I have.

I am going to use you , you are for my pleasure , you are for my use. I do not want to make love I want to fuck , I do not want my dick sucked I want to fuck your mouth. You have three holes for my use and will use when I have the need.

I will tie you up, gag you and at times even leave my mark. You have moved from being my best friend to my slave and property.

I am going to train you to fit my needs, I am going to change your train of thought , I am going to implement rules which you will follow, I will put protocols in place in which you will follow. I will allow open communication that is a need for me.

I am not trying to change you, I am going by what you told me from the beginning , you expressed your needs , you told me you wanted and had a need to be owned.

I am going to train you , train you how to act while out in public , remember you are a direct reflection of me your Master. When out alone you are a direct reflection of me , our world is small but you never know who you may run into, so it is best to be on your best behaviour.

I will put rules and protocols in place and you will follow, I will punish when needed but I will not punish you for no reason.

I will make you mine, I will make you feel owned, I will make you want to feel owned, I will make you crave submission. I will make you.

Now you ask what do I get out of the relationship ?

You get my undivided attention , I am here for you 24/7. I give you open communication, I give you loyalty , I give you the security you need, the guidance you need. I will alway put you first in my life no matter where I am or what I am doing . Yes you get me and all of me.

I will walk proudly with you , I will be honored to have you at my side. I will talk to you not at you.

I want you to have friends , I will encourage you

I will make sure your needs are met, I will not push you to the point of breaking you, but most of all I will respect you.

Vile

 

 

As A Dominant

Posted in 24/7, @vile62 on Twitter, bdsm, BDSM Relationships, Behavior Modification, cock sucking, Consistency, Depression, Dominance Through Intimidation, Dominant and Submissive, fucking, Manipulation, Master and slave relationship, Slave, Submission, submissive, viledesires62@aol.com on June 18, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

It is our responsibility to pick those up who have stumbled, those who are having a hard time coping , Those who are having a stressful position on life , those who are confused and feel they have no one to turn to.

Something that irks me , is to be at a public outing and the big bad Dom sits back and tells about his times and travels , what he has done, what he knows and the mile long experience he has, but when a submissive needs a helping hand they just turn their back and walk away.

You want the pussy but you do not want the responsibility , you want your dick sucked but you do not want the responsibility, you want to tie their ass up and beat them but you do not want the responsibility.

This does not pertain to all of course there are those who just enjoy fucking , but there are the few who are different , there are the few who suffer from depression. When you play with someone who has some sort of mental issue , you are doing nothing less that manipulating  them, your playing head games and once your front door closes your done your finished.

I was talking to someone the other day and he wanted to know hot to train someone , so in answering that each is different but I gave a few ideas and he stopped me midway and said it was to much work.  I explained that it could be a little work in the beginning but within 60 to 90 days everything would start to fall into place.

Training is no joke , as a matter of fact it is something close to rehabilitation , you are changing someones thought process, changing habits, the way someone dresses , talks and walks, of course this is a M’s relationship and at times it very well could be a D’s. Once everything is in place it is just daily maintenance , not weekly or bi-weekly it is daily.

You want the perfect relationship but your not willing to put the effort into building something that could be the most intense relationship you have ever had..

Karma is a bitch and it will bite you in your ass. Think twice before you ruin someones life. Unless your in for the long run leave the ones who are vulnerable   and need that guiding hand alone, unless your going to answer your phone at 3 am.

Playing with those who have emotional problems or suffer from depression does not make you a Dominant , it shows you are weak and you have no values, and if you think for one minute that you are not being talked about you are dead wrong..

So next time your sitting at at table at a munch and you introduce yourself as Master Dick , take a look around the room.

Vile

Your Going To Be Used

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM 24/7 Relationships, BDSM Relationship Negotiations, Choices, commitment, communication, compatibility, consequences, Consistency, Dominance Through Intimidation, fucking and sucking, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Safe and Sane, sex, Slave, Submission, Submissive, Sucking and fucking with tags , , , , , , , , on April 24, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

Welcome to a whole new world , a world of  kink , bondage , Discipline , sex , things you like and things you do not like. Welcome to the world of giving up your control. Welcome to the world of taking orders , following rules , protocols and structure.

There are two types of Dominants and Domme’s , those who care about you and have your best interest in mind , and those who are just looking to use and abuse and could not give a fuck about your feelings or your emotions and well being.

The bad your a object, your a piece of meat you have three holes or two if male with no face and when you speak your voice is not heard. Once you become to needy or start to question your status you are tossed aside like trash.

To the users you are nothing more than a commodity on the stock market and as you grow older your value will drop , your cock will not work as it did and your tits will start to sag as with your ass. You will go from trading at a hundred dollars or more to penny stocks and your playing field will become much smaller, and there will come a time your game will end.

You can only use so much , you can only play on someones emotions so long before your called out.

These men and women see submission as a weakness and nothing more, You are stupid , you are ignorant you have zero brain cells. Once you have grown tired of sucking dick or emptying out your bank account  your tossed a side only to start your next search but you did not learn from your last excursion. You will take the same path of destruction and repeat the relationship again and again. You will continue to send your pics , shoot videos and self punishment, and you will repeat these actions over and over and over.

You will complain to your friends , you will blog about your sorrows, you will blog about how bad the Dom was, you will complain about how you were used , but not one time will you accept responsibility for your own actions.

You make a mistake you correct it , if you make the same mistake that is possible but if you continue then you are just as stupid and the one using you. It is no longer the user it is you and only you, your the only one to blame.

The fake Dominant shows up when no one else is available and if you think your the only one sitting on the couch waiting for a text , you need to change your light bulb.

When you do see him or her , you get the pleasure of sucking cock or being used for about an hour then they have to run and you repeat , you sit on your couch watching Jerry Springer , because you can somehow relate.

The good news is once you decide to get on the right path and find someone who truly cares about you, the one thing you will be proficient in is cock sucking.

I know

You will continue to lay on your back , suck dick and get abused until you come to terms that something is wrong. Those who see the fake Domme’s seldom get the pussy if every, it is more bout humiliation and your bank account.

Your not dating little Johnny anymore , someone you would sit in the car and make out for hours with, or go to a movie theater when he would finger you or cop a feel of your tits.

Your life is going to go through some pretty drastic changes and you need to be on your game when you open the door.

You are now going to give up most of your freedom and in some cases all of your freedom for sometime.

Your going to be told what to wear , how to speak and when to speak. How to dress , your hair, your nails everything about you will change and it will change to fit someones needs.

Your no longer going to be begged to suck dick your going to be told. Your no longer going to begged to give up some pussy it will be taken and you will agree.

You have moved from being viewed as a girl friend or partner to property, an object a toy meant to be used.

You have to be able to communicate your needs and your thoughts when entering a relationship. You have to be able to say NO before entering a relationship. If you are feeling intimidated through fear you are not in the right frame of mind to be making any type of lifestyle decisions.

If you do not agree with something be it a sexual act or a rule you need to speak up , because if you do not you may be in for a bad experience and one you could end up getting hurt.

Here is  the key though is you are going to give up all of the above, if you are going to agree to all of the above, if you are going to serve one, give up control of your life , you are entitled to get something in return. What you get in return I guess depends on what you want out of life. I guess it also depends on how long your willing to wait on the one or spending your time jumping from one relationship to another making the same mistakes..

So why do we see so many lifestyle relationships crash ? Just as I am guilty I have settled for less, I have giving into my needs just for that moment in time companionship. Putting my kink to the side well some of it. Entering a relationship knowing we were not compatibility , it works for a short time but in the end you crash.

Many of us including me have put sex ahead of everything else, knowing it was not going to work. If your relationship is based on sex alone it will crash and burn with both leaving very hateful , putting the blame on each other.

Most are not willing to wait for the one , because we are selfish we want it now , we want it yesterday. If you the Dominant or submissive operate like this you will have a very lonely life and in some cases abusive.

I get emails all the time of those wanting advice , i email back with my opinion and I never hear back, why? Because it was not what they wanted to hear. They did not want the truth, they wanted to hear everything was going to be alright.

Life is based on two actions and only two. Choices and Consequences

vile

 

 

My Spirituality And BDSM

Posted in @vile62 on Twitter, Acceptance, Arianna, bdsm, BDSM Collar, BDSM Communitys, BDSM Relationships, consequences, Consistency, Dominant, Dominant and Submissive, fetlife, http://bestslavetraining.com/, https://vilesarianna.wordpress.com/2015/02/10/life/, Master And Slave, Master and slave relationship, Part Time Dominant, Part Time Submission, Religion, Slave, Submission, Submissive, viledesires62@aol.com on April 1, 2016 by thekinkyworldofvile

While I may be very outspoken , loud at times , I do have a habit of speaking my mind, in private or public. I am far from politically correct and if I think your bull shitting me I will be the first to call you out.

One obsession I have is speaking with elders , I love their stories of life from the beginning to the present, very wise and most information can be put to very good use. Each story is different , their life is different, some have had a very easy life while others struggled growing up. Some had a good home while other faced abuse on a daily basis.

While in Korea an Elder I met named Kim I would sit for hours and just listen while he spoke in broken English. The stories were very intense. The came the subject of Buddhism which i found very interesting.

Being in the army I could fly most anywhere in the world for about 10.00 dollars and my next stop was Thailand, this was mid 1980 I had just turned 18 and my first taste of the lifestyle.

Although Buddhism is a religion I never looked at it that way , the way I understood it it was a way of life. While at times when I first meet someone I am quick to judge , I try to set aside those feelings and give them a chance but most of the time my gut feeling was right.

I seldom give second chances but there are exceptions at times I am not sure why such as a friend I use to have Daddy M not one but two chances and he proved to be a pig.

I will help others if I see they are doing something to help themselves , if not I decline or I do not even bring it up.

most expect others to just jump in and fix what they have fucked up, remember 90% of our problems are self inflicting , this happens by using bad judgement , and not thinking about the choices and consequences. Trying to cheat the system , trying to get over on someone , be it a friend or even at times family.  I believe today family will fuck you faster and more often than someone you call a friend.

I have said this before I am not against religion I am against organized religion. Organized religion is evil, it is money driven, the poor feed the rich.

Live as you would want to be treated by others and give the same respect.

Today i am not a full practicing Buddhist but I walk with much of the beliefs, I do find time from time to time to meditate. I live a good life and I treat others with respect and I expect the same in return. The only down fall is some take my kindness as a weakness and those who walk into me blind are in a pasture they have never walked.

I can care and have great love for you but that switch can be turned off in a split second and never turned back on, this includes family.

I have nor do I allow drama into our life, I stop it before it becomes poison . The same way I handle problems , I handle before they become a problem.

To have a  successful and growing relationship both have to be honest and upfront , both have to be truthful and able to communicate their needs.

Compatibility is the most important thing when trying to build a relationship. It is okay to give and take on somethings , but if you give on needs it will never work..

The almighty married Dominant who is cheating on his wife. This is no Dom in any way shape or form. His wife wont suck cock or take it up the ass, and not into pain. This is a kink to them and nothing more. They prey on those who are submissive because they believe you are weak and simple minded. They believe you just want to be used and punished.

Your a piece of ass, only able to experience submission when the Dominant can get away from his wife. He comes to your place or you get a room. You suck dick , get your ass beat and your dropped off. Ill text you later..

I get emails all the time and comments as well one just the other day about seeing a married Dom that turned into a disaster , she was able to see she was just being used.

A close friend of mine was seeing a married Dom, why ? I do not have a clue. He could only go out when he had something to do, other than that he was stuck home with wifey.

So he moved and the relationship ended or so she thought, when he sent her a text she politely turned him down and all of a sudden he had found someone younger and told her to go fuck herself.

A few months later another text. Want to Fuck ? She did not reply and the text continued, so I decided to send him an email on fetlife. He would not answer me , but continued to text her and tell her how weak she was followed by the names again. I sent him a total of 8 emails , shrugs. I even invited him to a local function , but that went unanswered …..

I would think as a submissive or slave while in a relationship you would want the whole pie and not just a slice. I would think you would want to be treated with respect. I would think you would want to be cared for. I would think you would want to be more than a piece of ass. I would think you would want to experience the training process, the experience of earning your collar.  Maybe I am wrong ?

My way is not the only way , but i do have a proven formula that I have put together and used and in my relationship it works, and it works well. I trained to fit my needs , I trained to help arianna , I trained so that she could achieve goals, and Ive supported her. Being supportive plays a huge role , just as communication.

As always i got off track a little, but if you follow you know this already. I love sharing my life , I love sharing my growth when it comes to the lifestyle…

Much love

Vile