I want Your Submission

Taking control over someones life is a huge responsibility. Turning your life over to someone takes a lot of trust.

Taking over someones life requires the Dominant to devote a great deal of time. Turning your life over to someone requires you to be open and truthful and having the ability to be able to communicate.

Taking control over someones life requires the Dominant to be truthful, and honesty and having the ability to communicate. Turning yourself over to someone requires you to give yourself 100%, 100% of the time.

The Dominant runs the show. The way the relationship turns out is soly on the Dominants shoulders.
The only exception would be if the Slave or submissive does not have the heart, or the will to enter such a relationship.

The Dominant sets the pace, the Dominant sets the standards, the Dominant sets the protocols , and The Dominant sets the rules.

Before entering such a relationship the Slave or Submissive has to be very clear about their needs. They need to be very clear as to what it would take for them to be able to function in such a relationship. What do you need in a D’s Or M’s relationship? What are your goals within a relationship? What do you expect out of your Dominant in a relationship?

Just as I find the 128 rules to be a fucking joke, I find Anal training by web cam to be a fucking joke, or meeting with no panties.
The above is something a 20 year old Dominant would expect, because it is then about being controlling and not in control.

Your fucking your ass on a web cam so some dude can jack off, and once you turn your computer off, you will crawl up in your bed alone and cry yourself to sleep.

The above is in no way, a way to gain someone submission. The above is no way to prove you are the Master Of disaster , man slayer woman player. Starting out training someone to suck your cock is not training.

The Dominant says well I am poly. The submissive thinks for a minute and finely says well you know I prefer a one on on, she never says she is not, I prefer.
What you have done then is opened a door you the submissive cannot close. If your not poly say it. If the Dominant gets up and walks out so fucking what.

Your having a problem finding the right Dominant or Master, I can honestly tell you that is your fault and no one Else’s , yes you the Slave or Submissive are the one to blame.

How can that be Vile ? How can it be my fault ? I am insulted by your remarks.

I am going to give you two main reasons. One your are not completely honest with yourself and who you are. Two you are not honest with the Dominant when you first meet him.

If you feel completely comfortable when you first meet then stay and see where it goes. If your first meeting is about fucking or sucking cock, get up and leave.
If you feel intimidated when you first meet get up and leave, because Domination through intimidation is no way to start a successful relationship.

These are my limits, um I do not do anal, and I am not into pain. Your limits are duly noted, and I will respect your limits.
If the limits are pushed and you are questioned, again tell the Dominant thank you and get up and walk the fuck out.

Vile that would be me, I never question limits, I never ask why? I never say well lets try. I never say well we can do someone anal training. I never say well while your at home why don’t you try.

I have a very good reason as to why I never bring it up again and it is so fucking simple you can be smarter than a 5th grader.

Because if you the Dominant are who you say you are, you do what you say your going to do, you are completely honest, and you remain consistent.
Now those are just a few of the keys, those are the keys that will open the door to submission, and as your relationship grows, and you continue your communication. Here it comes,,,,, wait for it, it is coming, wait for it.

Bam her submission will grow deeper, she will trust more, she will want to follow. In the end she will want to give you everything you need.
The minute you start to question someones limits, that is the time the trust issues come into play, and your relationship may or may not survive, if it does you are still not getting 100% and you never will, because you went back on your word, and that means you lied.

If you the Dominant are who you say you are. If you the Dominant does not have any anger issues. If you the Dominant are truthful and honest, and you do what you say your going to do, there is no end to the submission, there are no limits, well within reason.

I have something I live by. I never ask someone to do something I have not already done or I would not do. That includes needle play which I will admit I am very good at.
Needle play however is a very hard limit for Arianna and I fully respect that. Even if she came to me and wanted to try I would probably not because I know her fear of needles.

Your submission can and will grow under the right hands , but it depends on many factors, it also depends on what you want out of your relationship.

The start is the getting to know each other prior to any type of play, and you need to make it a point up front that is your intentions, getting to know each other.

In the past I have ragged on married men who cheat, I have also explained how they use you as an escape , an escape into a fantasy world they cannot have at home.
The things they are looking for is things their wives will not do, or they are to ashamed to bring the subject up.

Firs thing is he will not leave his wife, this is more true if he has kids. He is not going to lose his house and everything else, including paying child support.
What he has at home is security, he has someone who makes sure all the bills are paid, someone to cook and clean house, do laundry, and fuck from time to time.
You are there to fill the gap, you are there for one thing and one thing only, the Kink.

Entering a relationship any relationship for that matter you want to be number one, not two or three, number one.

Seeing a weekend warrior you are not getting anything out of the lifestyle. At the end of the day after a couple of hours of play you get in your car and drive home alone, you also wake up alone, and you go to bed alone.

You are now a piece of the pie, you are not the whole pie, just a slice, and you will continue being a slice until you figure out you have been played.

Some will play the fear game with you, the intimidation game and you fall for it. That is no way to start out a relationship. If you cannot communicate you have nothing.

You who are single it is not hard to find a partner, and it is easier to find the right partner, but you have to play the game of patience. Patience is the key and if you follow your own rules, your own guidelines , your own instinct it will happen. If at anytime you feel something is not right when you meet someone, excuse yourself and leave, you have lost nothing but an hour or so, which could of turned into months of drama and heartache.

I do not want to demand submission , I do not want to tell you to call me Sir Or Master , I want to earn it. When you kneel in front of me I want it to be because it is a need for you not just to please. I want you to crawl to me because you have the need.

Since the 50 shades epidemic , Doms have sprouted up like weeds , I call these Doms Kia Reo’s.
They have cheap payments, high maintenance , and very undependable.

I would hope you would want more out of a relationship , I would hope you think your better than that.

BDSM is not about sex , BDSM is not about learning how to suck cock, or train your ass.

BDSM is about respect, structure , communication , and finding your submission. Yea the kink is nice but you should take small steps.
Meeting someone in a motel once or twice a month is just kink and your being used. I know some are fine with this type of arrangement and if that is your game and your not looking for anything more , then more power to you.

I want everything you said you would not do when I first met you, no pressure no questions. I want to get you to that point, I want you to have the need to please.
This is done by being who you said you were, and doing what you promised. This is done by providing the structure , the stability , and the security you promised.

It is not a game , it is about being yourself.

What Makes A Dominant

thekinkyworldofvile

This is an answer that will differ from one person to another. Every Submissive, Slave, or Baby Girl will have a different definition. Every Slave, Submissive or Baby Girl has different needs, their submissive is on different levels, but the characteristics should be somewhat the same when it comes to A definition.

Honesty should be first on the list. When you first meet a new Dominant the first words out of his mouth is. You should always be honest with me. Now if he holds you to such high standards , why would he not be held to the same ?

I know I rag on married men who cheat on their wives, but if a man is married and he tells you, I want you to be honest with me at all times. You need to stop and think about those words coming out of his mouth, because he…

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Seven Most Common Types Of Submissive’s. What are you?

I wanted to share this again

thekinkyworldofvile

I ran across this article on Tumbler , Hmm I forgot I even had an account there. Southernbarbie asked me to post about a Brat, which I think fits her really well.

What this article did not cover in the Brat section was, most brats when around other females are usually pretty rude, they can be somewhat cold, and short to the point. The brat needs to be the center of attention. Most times a brat is hard to control, but can be tamed with the right partner, but at times she can still be somewhat defiant, stubborn, and if she has any rules, she does not think twice about breaking one. The brat worries about the consequences at a later date. Most of the time the brat thinks she can talk her way out of trouble.

With the right partner she can however be controlled, when in the company…

View original post 2,223 more words

The Definition Of BDSM Has Changed

In 1967 a book was released by an author named John Norman , and the Gorean lifestyle was born. Normans books were spread out over the years from 1967 to roughly about 1988.

While BDSM was still under ground the Gorean lifestyle was growing. Although the books were based on fantasy it was still about Dominants and women who served as Slave or Kajira.

Although the books may be about fantasy’s Dominant males and submissive females the Gorean lifestyle is alive and well.

In the past I have had the opportunity to meet couples who were in and lived the Gorean lifestyle, and I was amazed at how the female Slave, Kajira carried herself while in a public setting.

The Gorean lifestyle is not about sex, although it does take place. The lifestyle is about structure , protocols , and rules. While it is true most Gorean Masters do have more than one Slave , everyone works as a unit, a family. Everyone works to better the home the Master has provided.

Lets look at BDSM

B&D, which stands for bondage and discipline.

D/s, which stands for dominance and submission

S&M, which stands for sadism and masochism

No where in those words does it say your training starts with sucking cock , or if you take it up the ass or not. Through out the years the terminology has lost its meaning.

Somewhere we have lost much of the structure the lifestyle was once based on.

You will respect me. Respect it not something that can be demanded, Fake respect however can be, butt hat will washout in the laundry. With fake respect you have earned nothing but the dumb ass award, and showing just how childish you are.

You cannot demand submission, you can however receive Fake submission, if that is really what your looking for.

Again Fake Submission will only go so far.  If the submission is fake what are you really getting out of it , it would seem the submissive is getting even less.

This is the first time I have brought this up but I believe options are good.  Having options gives you a much bigger picture, and you have something to compare to as well.

I think dating more than one Dominant before entering a relationship would give you the bigger picture. It would also give you options.

It also gives you the chance to look at the different qualities in a Dominant, the different personality’s , and the different views when it comes to the lifestyle. Having choices is good and sometimes only having once choice is not so good.

It was sometime ago I had a post called 30 days of no fucking, keeping your legs closed and your mouth shut. The idea is to see if the Dominant is really interested in you or if he just wants a piece of ass. You are a slave or submissive, but you only submit when you choose to do so. The ball is in your court, that does not mean you are being disrespectful, that only means you are being careful, and you can do this while not letting your guard down.

Once you let your guard down you are had, then you only have a 50/50 chance of things going in the right direction. 30 days is not a long time when you are thinking about your future. It is your life you are talking about, whom you wish to submit to is up to you.

You can enter into a relationship and about two months into it you find out his life is a total wreck, problems coming out of his ass, drama, ex wife issues, kids, behind on child support, maybe a drinking problem, or even a drug problem.

A drinking problem equals a temper problem, and I promise you that is so true. If drinking impairs your driving, it does the same during play.

I am not sure why some will jump through hoops to pretend to be someone they are not. The truth is you can be who who are and no one gives it a second thought. Its when you try acting like your someone your not and people think your an idiot.

There are submissive’s who are just as bad as the fake male Dominant, there are those who have their own agenda , I call these women poison , they poison everyone they come in contact with. It is all about give me, give me this, give me that, I want, want, and want, but they give nothing in return.

Pure Poison and they will walk over who they have to , just to get what they want. Most Dominants or men in general cannot see it they are blind, and they will try and try and try, and continue to fail, and still wipe their tears and keep going, and really it is just over a piece of ass.
There is no pussy , ass , or mouth worth the stress they will put you through. The truth is when you are down and out you will be left out in the cold with no one to turn to.
If your damaged you may be able to be fixed, but if your broken, you will remain broken, well at least until you wise up and you realize the world is not about you.

I got off track there a little bit , Franco Bolli asked me some time ago why I just ragged on the Fake Dominants and never women, but he is right there are some gold digging bitches out there, who will drain you dry like a leach.

The respect thing, I have had other Male Dominants come right out and ask me if they could fuck Arianna, and I just get this blank stare from them like I am really going to answer their stupid question, or can we trade slaves for the weekend?
The someone sharing their property I never really got, or how a Dominant could just pass his property around like they are a bag of trash.
Here you go fuck her, or suck his dick make me proud , and there are some who really think this way. So some dude dumps his cum in your slave and you take her home and eat her out, really?

Your D’s or M’s relationship should not be about sex only. You want that bond between the two of you, you want that connection, that feeling, that craving.

I am not speaking about those who are married and they are venturing off into our world, they will find their own comfort zone , they will find their needs and kinks, and they will grow. Some will keep it just in the bedroom, but there are others who will grow, and continue to grow and search.

So with your new found Master your Training consist of meeting in public with a short skirt with no panties. Your not allowed to look at me eye to eye , Sucking cock, and Anal Training on cam. Oh and I almost forgot your not allowed to cum for 30 days or at times even longer.
I would like for someone to explain to me what are the benefits of the above ? What type of structure does the above provide , how does the above help you in your daily life ?

See this is not a game , if your going to suck dick , lay on your back and take it up the ass, what are you going to get out of the relationship?
You already have a vision , you already know what your looking for , but your to afraid to speak up in fear of getting dumped

Submissive, What makes you a Dominant ? Being a Dominant what do you get out of it ? Do you have any on going problems ? If divorced is there any drama with your ex ? Do you have a drinking problem or any type of drug problem ?
What are the goals you have for your property ? What type of structure do you plan on providing ? Are you going to require me to do something that could cause me to lose my job or family ? Will I be allowed to see my family and friends ?
How many D’s or M’s relationships have you been in and what happened ?
The list of questions just go on and on and on, and the funny thing is they are all in the back of your mind but your to scared to ask them again in fear of being dumped.

You could avoid a huge mess just by asking a few questions.

Why do I have to suck your cock to prove I am submissive ?

Never allow someone to disrespect you, never allow someone to use you unless it is on your terms.
You deserve the best life has to offer you do not have to settle for less..

I have a saying. I want the world and everything that comes with it, and the truth is today and everyday I feel like I have it, and you can as well.

Vile

My 1000th Post

It is hard to believe I have hit 1000 post, time sure does fly by.

I started my blog The Kinky World Of Vile with one intent.
I wanted to give a guide to those who are entering the awesome world of BDSM.

Much of my blog is about me, my past , present and a little about where I think my future will take me.

The biggest thing I hit on though is safety. What you should be looking out for when your looking for a new partner, a Dominant, a Master, or a Daddy Dom. Because in the past 20 yrs or so I have filled different roles in the lifestyle.

Safety is huge today, and if you do not know anything about the lifestyle, it can be a very hard road.
Unfortunately most of what we learn in life is by making mistakes , mistakes can be good if you learn from them.

In the past I have taken advantage of women, in the past I have used women, just so I could get what I wanted.

I have had many successful relationships that ended because it was just time to move on, and I have been in relationships that ended in failure, and the failure was my own doing, my fault.
I have been in relationships that were just convenient for that time. It is good sometimes to have a piece of ass around when you want it, or you would think so, but it is not always what it seems.

I have shared my first real experience with a Slave. How I learned so much from her, and now as I look back, what we did she craved but in my eyes it was just abuse.
Sherri called me Master but I was so far from being a Dominant it was not funny , and I was never a Master, nor was I in control.
I was someone who inflicted pain so someone could get off. There were no rules, no protocols, nothing.
The biggest part of the relationship was about humiliation. Some would think it was fun, but it really became a burden because I had to out do what I had done with new sessions.

What I did learn though was impact play. I learned where it was safe to hit and not safe to hit. Believe it or not you can really hurt someone if you do not know what you are doing.

As I look back if I had met her today I would not of entered such a relationship. Number one that is not me, and two I know now what I did was abuse, because of her mental state.

I do however believe just because someone is bipolar does not mean they cannot enter a D’s or M’s relationship. Being with someone who truly cares about you and your well being makes a real difference.

I have posted material about how someone knew could meet a new Dominant and the questions to ask. I have mentioned the warning signs, and how to tell if someone is real or not.
It is so easy to avoid a huge disaster , and move on until you find the right one.

While the majority of my relationships have been long term, the reason they did not last as in the one, was because I settled for something less.
I settled for the then, the now instead of what I wanted and needed

You cannot change who you are, I have tried, I left the lifestyle in search of something that was not there, and even being unhappy I remained loyal, until the day I left, because I made a commitment.
Many believe they are submissive but once they enter a relationship they come to terms that they are not. Most Dominants will try to stick it out, but will soon walk away.

This is something the submissive cannot understand but the Dominant is doing the right thing. It is not fair to her and it is not fair to him..

Many women who are married to a vanilla male and she wakes up one morning with a burning desire to serve, cannot expect her partner to step in and turn his life around or his beliefs.

Many see D’s or M’s as abuse and it is a mental picture that will never go away
The first word out of the submissive’s mouth is more control, and this is all the male hears and he wants no part of that.
He married you to take care of the home, the bills, the cooking the laundry, getting the car serviced.

So you either pack up and leave, or you suck it up like your suppose to.

I have talked about how I truly believe a woman can find herself at a later age, meaning something triggers an emotion, something triggers the need to serve.

I also believe this is less likely to happen with a Male Dominant.
A male Dominant is born, he is Dominant by nature. I knew in my early teens I was different. I had different needs when it came to sex.
It was not even really about sex it was about control, and it took me years to perfect what I have today.

When I am talking I am giving a males side of things not just mine. I am telling you how we think, what makes us tick.

So you need to take a few steps to insure you are getting exactly what you need in a relationship.

Okay so if a Dom you are first meeting gets upset because you are asking to many questions, he does not have your best interest in mind.

Your going to be the one laying on your back, your going to be the one on your knees, so you should have expectations, you should have questions and concerns.
Are your limits going to be respected ? Are you going to be number one in his life?

One of the first questions most ask is are you Bi ? Have you ever been with another woman ? Do you have fantasy’s about it?
If you say no then here comes the disapproval , here comes the I am the dominant you do as I say.

I myself love seeing two women together, there is nothing more hotter, than watching a woman go down on another woman.

Here is the thing Arianna is no Bi although she has been with a few women.

I respect her and I respect her enough to never force her to do something her heart is not into.
Another question , why would I take a chance and fuck up what I have now? Why would I want to possibly hurt Arianna? Hurting her mentally.
Arianna comes first and she always will, on another note I am living the dream because as it is I get anything I want, and I do mean anything.
So I would never jeopardize what I have , in the end I could lose everything.

So my 1000th post or blog what ever you call it. While I do not claim to know everything, nor do I believe my way is the only way, I would hope you can take bits and pieces and put something together.

I have talked about Training. Training does not really take place in a D’s relationship and even less in a Daddy Dom relationship.
Although at one time I filled those shoes, it was not who I was or wanted to be, I let my emotions get the best of me.
Even today When at a Munch or a MAsT meeting I have trouble relating to other Dominants and more so the Daddy Doms, because it seems there is no type of structure or protocols.
It is not to say all relationships are that way, but I suppose that is why I do not have that many friends.

Twenty plus years in the lifestyle and their is one Dominant I call a true friend, and sometimes he even makes me shake my head but we can relate to each other.

I currently have others I am trying to get close to, but I am having a hard time. Even as friends you have to have something in common.

I have spoken about how important it is to become friends before moving into a D’s relationship. Although communication is a very valuable asset, compatibility comes into play and compatibility in my eyes could be a serious deal breaker.
You want a Dominant who wants to get to know you as a person first, instead of someone who just wants their cock sucked.

A well structured home is a stable home. A Dominant with not anger issues is a stable home. Consistency equals a stable home, communication open communication equals a stable home.

The same goes for the male Dominant as well, many times the Dominant will settle for less, thinking he will be able to change someone. Many times this will not work out, and it becomes more of a struggle and causing stress and arguing.

The idea is not to change someone  but to improve on what is there , while it is true we train to fit our needs, changing someone to someone they are not will never work.

I think this goes to men who are vanilla as well, settling for less and they end up looking outside the home to be happy. It is not fair to your partner because you made the mistake. It is not fair to your partner to mislead them.

Then when your caught and you will get caught you put the blame on them, but that is just to make you feel good…

Think about it, if your seeing a married Dominant who is cheating, and he is telling you how bad his wife is behind her back, think about what he is telling his friends about you behind your back.

If you stop and think about it, if his life was really so fucking bad he would of been long gone. He would of already been divorced prior to meeting you. Then you have to look deeper, if he is cheating on her, he will cheat on you, if you think other wise you need to do some real soul searching.

Training a slave, I have talked about the importance of being not only consistent during training but after as well. Consistency means everything.

Prior to training a plan should be put together a short term plan as well as a long term plan. It is very important you know the slave, it is very important you know the needs of the slave.

Prior to training Arianna I spent about a week putting a plan together that I would would work. I also looked at what aspects of the training I would have any type of resistance , and how I would handle it.

Once I started I never said okay get ready get set go. I slowly introduced things into her life. One of the first things I did was validate who I was not what I was but who. So I introduced her to very close friends in the lifestyle I had known for 15 plus years and some beyond 20 years. I had nothing to prove, I wanted to make her feel more comfortable knowing I had been truthful with her, I was in fact who I said I was.

The initial training was roughly 90 days, and it was 90 days of no real freedom, very little speech, and a lot of listening and paying attention. We attended local events, and I even invited another Master and Slave over and Arianna was the host.

The one thing that threw me off was the lack of resistance, Arianna just went with the flow. The truth is that was something I had not counted on, and although I was somewhat confused I just went ahead as planned.

To date I have never left a Mark on Arianna, and I have never raised my voice to her. To date we have never had an argument. It is not because she is not allowed to voice her opinion, it is because we have the right connection.

A Dominant who is abusive has no place in the lifestyle, a Dominant with a temper has no place in the lifestyle. A Dominant with a drinking problem has no place in the lifestyle. A Dominant with drug addiction has no place in the lifestyle.

My way may not be your way, as a matter of fact I am almost sure its not, but what I am giving you is the foundation, something you can build on.

In my world there is such a thing as perfection and she wakes every morning. Perfection is in the eye of the beholder. At times I just set back and look and I think to myself , yea I did that.

Vile radio is coming That I promise, things have just been so busy, but it is something we are working on, it will be a lot of fun, and yet another get away for me…

1000 post post and another 1000 coming, much love to all the awesome people who follow my blog, and a huge thanks to those who stop by.

You know your always free to comment , and you do not have to agree with me, your also welcome to ask questions, but just make sure you want the truth.

Vile

10/ 20 Coming my 1000th post

I have covered a lot in two years and i am going to give an awesome recap of everything.
I hope everyone enjoys.

Vile

Why I got So Upset At The Library

Every week As I look at my pay stub, I just like every other worker pays taxes, some more than others but we still pay.

The way I look at it I own a chunk of that Library , it is mine. It is there for me to check out my movies if I so desire, books, or just go and relax and read in peace.

Many public buildings are used by the homeless to go in and clean up, use the bathroom, and get ready for their busy day of doing what ever they do.
Maybe go through the trash, panhandle, steal from people who work.

Several years ago I saw a young man standing on the corner with a sign. Will work for food my family is starving.

I pull into a Krystal’s fast food place and I go in and order 20 of their small burgers.
I walk outside and I say here man take these to your wife and kids.
He then opens the bag and looks at a burger and complains because there is no cheese. So I reach out and I take the bag back from him and I tell him to have a nice day… In short he was really looking for money and not food for his children.

Now in the past I have been down and out, never to the point of standing on a corner with a sign.
I have always managed to pull myself back up , dust of my shirt and keep marching..

I firmly believe we choose our own destiny , I also believe we can for the most control the outcome of our daily lives.
Now there are things that do come up that we have no control over, but if you have the drive to stay a float it can be done.

Sometime a go I managed a call center for MBNA bank, after leaving I managed an Eckerd drug store. I was with Eckerd for about 7 years until they were bought out by what is known as CVS today.
The reason I was let go even after being with Eckerd drugs was because I did not have a Masters Degree.
The truth is I made about 25.000 thousand more than a CVS manager did.
At that time I was giving a one day notice. We shook hands and I said fuck you very much as I was handed my severance pay.

I have made 85.000 a year, and in less than a week I went to a new job making 22.000 a year.
I suppose what I am getting at, I did not let it get me down. I kicked the dirt and continued marching.

Today the Eckerd drug store I managed is closed. CVS shut the doors two years after I left, Hmmm the new manager with a Masters degree?

I own the Library , maybe not the whole building but I still own, just as I own the courthouse, the police station.
My taxes I pay says I own them, so it is my duty to insure they are taking care of.

One problem many people have is they live far above their means. If you make a 150k a year you live like you make a 150k a year.
You lose your job, you find another but now your only making a 100k a year, guess what? Something has to go, you are going to lose something.

I could of said nothing yesterday, and just shrugged it off, but with a trash can within a couple of feet. It was clear neither gave a fuck.

So that was my reason for getting so upset.

Today if you are down and out, and even homeless there are organization’s who will help , maybe not the help you think you need but help. Maybe not as fast as you want it to be but still help.
That is of course you really want the help, if you do it is out there.

If you want to come in the Public Library I own you are going to respect it. I knew they would not of listened to me that is why I waited until the two walked through the doors, and the closer I got the madder I got.

Vile

Our Trip To The Local Library.

We needed to print a lot of paper work and Arianna wanted to go to the Library.

As we are walking in Arianna says Master remember this is the library please.  I was like um okay and she said well people here are quiet. Ohh okay got ya.

So this morning after feeding the fish we head over and Arianna goes to work.

So im in the history section I love history,  mainly stuff with war and dictators.

Anyway i want to hit my ecig and head down stairs step outside and what a relief.

This couple was walking up and they crushed two beer and throw them down on the ground. Im standing there in disbelief wondering , what the fuck.

I walk in behind them and im like yo dude what the fuck are you thinking?

Now everyone is just staring at me and i continue. Your a fucking moron go outside and pick your beer cans up and put them in the trash.

Here comes the security guard and shes telling me to calm down.

She ask what the problem was and i said this fucking idiot threw beer cans on the ground before they walked in.

He of course said he didn’t,  and i called him a lying bitch.

Everyone is still staring at me, then it hits me.

Library oops my bad.

So they are escorted out they pick up the cans, as they are walking away hes flipping me off.

Maybe next time it will be quiet right?

Vile

 

If I Control Your Mind

How much of her submission do you want ? Have you ever wanted a Slave or submissive who has no inhibitions? Have you ever wanted a slave or submissive who is 100% compliant ?
Have you ever wanted a relationship where the word argue is not in either ones vocabulary?
Have you ever wanted a Docile pet, Baby Girl, submissive or slave ?
Do you want someone who will follow you without question ?

The truth is you can have all of the above and more. The bad news is it takes a little work on your part, the Dominant, yes you are going to have to put in a little effort.

You know I was chatting with a Dom on Facebook the other day, and he told me his life was basically a wreck, and when I told him he needed a plan, he laughed at me. He laughed and he meant it.

If you the Dominant enters a relationship and you are true about what you want and need, and your willing to put your slave or submissive first, dedicate the time that is needed, you can have anything you want, and I do mean anything, and without question.

Some of you are going to say dude your full of shit, there is no such thing as a relationship like that is there?
I am here to tell you I am living the dream, and you the Dominant can live the dream as well.

BDSM is not about pain or how many bruises you can leave. BDSM is not about humiliation. BDSM is not about barking orders. Most of all BDSM is not about demanding respect or submission, it is about earning both.

You can never demand submission, it does not work that way, but some have it in their mind, I am Dominant and you will submit.
You may luck out and find a submissive who is down and out with a low self esteem, who will follow you for a short time, and meet your silly demands, but that bull shit is so short lived.

Control, that word openings up a whole new world. If your truly in control of yourself, your life, your surroundings the moon is the limit.
Being in full control, you will earn respect, you will earn the right to be called Sir, or Daddy even Master. Those titles what ever they are worth are earned. If you have to demand they mean nothing, nothing at all.

So we go a little deeper, instead of telling someone to crawl to you, or having trouble enforcing rules, not wanting to follow rules.
Why not have someone who wants to crawl to you, or someone who has the need to follow rules, the need to please ?

A D’s or M’s relationship is really easy, it does not require any drama, , no yelling, no getting angry and losing your temper. Just being who you say you are, just doing what you say your going to do, and keep your word, and be nothing but truthful….

Being truthful will help you earn the trust that is needed, and earning the trust will also lead to submission.

One thing that gets to me, is a Dom will say you must always be truthful and he is living a lie. You cannot expect someone to be someone if you are not who you are suppose to be…

This strategy will not only work is a D’s or M’s relationship but much of this can work in a vanilla relationship.

We as men, Dominant or not, we have to value our partner , we have to respect and be thankful for who and what they are, because in the end they are the only ones who will have our back in a time of need.

If you control their mind , for the most as well all know BDSM is mental, BDSM is communication, BDSM is about control and not controlling, BDSM is about having patience, BDSM is about understanding and caring about ones needs.

Being able to fully understand your partner and what makes them tick.
Being able to let your partner rant or share their thoughts without getting angry. Being able to understand when they are feeling funky and just letting them alone for a while.
You would not believe how many arguments could be avoided by using this practice.

You have to learn when it is okay to ignore certain situations and when some needs to be addressed.

I screw everything up, it is all my fault, I did it, I cant do anything right. Come on you have all heard this.
There are times when you just stay quite and let things pass, instead of drilling to find out what is wrong.

I mentioned how important the journal is, this gives the Dominant a great tool to find out where his slave or submissive is coming from.

Communication, several times a day I ask Arianna what is on her mind. She knows this is free time, she can share her thoughts and we talk about them.
Even if it is something that was brought up before, we should be open to talk about it.
Well we have already talked about that so there is no need to bring it up again.
Sure there is and it may have greater importance this time around.

This is how we access the open communication. The slave or sub will feel they can now talk about anything and everything.
This is also a step in the right direction when it comes to trusting.

Although we want to know what they are thinking, we want to know why they are thinking it. I know it sounds complicated but it is really not.

I mentioned the first 90 days of training. The training process is more effective if the two are living together.
Reason being there has to be some form of consistency while training if not , the process can take much longer. The 90 days does not mean training is completed because it never really ends.
As we grow we learn, and the more we learn the more we share. We also want our property to grow as well.

Living together allows you to put rules and protocols in place and the Dominant can be sure they are being followed.

If you the Dominant are in the right frame of mind, your property will want to follow without question.

Getting into the mind that is where you want to be. You should know your property inside out. You want to learn things they have never told anyone else.

Whether you know it or not when you the Dominant shows anger this is a weakness, and it is a weakness they slave or submissive will use against you.
These are buttons that can be pushed and will be pushed. Anger controlling anger take a lot of control and self training.
You want to figure the slave or sub out, what makes them tick, their thoughts , their needs, but if they ever figure you out, it is game over, and showing your anger, and being abusive, be it verbal, mental or physical, you just might as well pack up your bags.
Being happy in a relationship is one thing, but a submissive no matter how happy they may be if they are not getting what they need, it will be found somewhere else.
I know I am speaking from experience. Once you lose that control, it is nearly impossible to regain, I know I lost.
The best way to start is to think before you speak, think about how it is going to sound coming out of your mouth.

An angry mans words are a calm mans thoughts, that is true, just like a drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts. So thinking before we speak, taking in that deep breath, really makes a world of difference.

The calmer your are, the more in control you are, the greater the submission will grow.

What many of us fail to see is there is no right way, we all have different needs, finding the right partner to fill that void is the right way.
The last thing we should do or want to do is try to change someone. We can improve but to change is not fair…

Vile

Before Your Training……

Training seems to be an area many of you who are submissive have been mislead on. It seems many of you have been giving incorrect information, or your just being used.

Remember my blog is my own opinion , but you also have to remember I am giving you a males point of view and nothing more.

Courtship , courtships are so nice, I remember dating back in school, and the courtship set the pace of what was to come.

Although once I hit the age of 14 I went through some huge changes. It was as though I woke one morning a different person, something animalistic inside me came to life.

Courtship before BDSM the getting to know each other phase, the giggling and laughing. The different foods we like, how we like our steaks cooked. The music we like, places we have traveled and so on.

Something I did prior to meeting Arianna, if I was considering a relationship. I would require the slave to write a journal for 30 days.

You cannot possibly enter a D’s Or M’s relationship not knowing each other. You and I know this can not be done in a week or even two weeks.

Now if your just looking for the kink side of things, and your not interested in the structure, protocol’s and everything else that goes along with a D’s relationship , then the above would not include you.

It takes roughly a month for the Dominant to know you well enough , before he can start implementing rules and Protocols. The Dominant has to know you inside and out.

Something else you have to consider, every Dominant is different, every Dominant has different expectations, goals, and needs.

A journal is an inside peak into your life, it tells who you are, what your thoughts are, your needs, and what you need out of a relationship.

I would take the journal and spend about a week reading it so I could come to understand the slave. I wanted to know what made the slave tick. I wanted to know what the slaves needs were. Where she was now and where she wanted to be in the future.

Putting a plan together, a training plan that would benefit the slave.

As a Dominant or Master our only concern is our property is being taking care of, mentally and physically, nothing else matters because we are now going to put our property before anything else in our life. We have made a clear commitment and a promise we would be there for them no matter what….

You should be number one at all times, that is what you expect and you should not settle for anything less..

Compatibility is the first both will need to find out, if you agree to enter a relationship and you really know nothing about each other the relationship will be short lived..

I do agree the training should start once you enter the relationship but there has to be a getting to know each other phase, if it is just sexual then that is all your going to have.

Let the Dominant explain upfront what your training is going to consist of, what your going to get out of your training.
If those questions cannot be answered then you are with a 50 Shades of Grey Dominant, and that is one thing the movie left out was the training, why the training and how to maintain a D’s Or M’s relationship.

50 shades of grey is just a more intense version of the movie , 9 1/2 weeks and nothing more

If your Dom is not taking interest in your needs, or lets say your blog, or your not recognized on social sites as being their partner, or not interested in your hobbies, then you know he does not have your best interest in mind, and your probably really nothing to him.

The journal opens the door to your world. It shows the real you, it shows your inner feelings that you may not otherwise be willing to share.
Sometimes putting it on paper is much easier that trying to talk and share your feelings.

You know even today Arianna will email me if something is on her mind, because it is easier for her to explain something in that form, and I understand.

If your journal is your blog, make sure your Dominant reads it, ask him questions about your thoughts, sit down together and go over everything.
He may be able to give you a much clearer picture.

Both of you need a clear plan prior to entering the relationship. ..

Vile